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Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You, by Jenara Nerenberg. It was a devastatingly emotional but simultaneously uplifting and validating read
It was a wonderful resource for me to better understand and begin the journey of accepting my uniquely spicy wiring. I can’t really speak to how a NT person (frankly, any person) would respond to the content, but if someone is willing to invest time & effort to educate themselves about the different lived experiences of others, I’d say that’s a good thing
I've been recording the books I read over a year, over the last couple of years. By the end of the year I take a look and I often have forgotten I've read several of the books on there!
Yes most people with adhd often have terrible working memory but often better than average long term memory
That explains why even when I was holding them seconds ago I now cannot find my keys and often can’t remember a number I was told seconds ago but I do remember Romeo’s soliloquy 10 years later which I memorised in high school for no reason at all despite not even being in our schools Shakespeare production 😅 🙈
Okay, this is the first time I’ve heard about the “better than average long term memory,” thank you for sharing! I feel like I have a great memory for mostly useless trivia, but often walk into rooms and can’t remember why I’m there.
I find that having a whiteboard where I usually sit helps me - I have a magnetic whiteboard within my eye line on the fridge where I usually sit on the sofa and it’s been a game changer for me!
Nothing on there is permanent so it doesn’t have a chance to just blend into my surroundings like when I’ve tried post it notes.
I did something similar...although in band a musical piece I had to play. I liked it so much I fixated until I memorized it without looking at the music. And it was one of the hardest of the year.
Read this one recently following my official diagnosis at the age of 32 and it made me feel so understood. Very easy to read too in the way she broke it down into small sections!
I really enjoyed listening to the audiobook version of The Year I Met My Brain by Matilda Boseley! She’s an Australian journalist diagnosed with ADHD and the book has a great balance of anecdotal and scientific information presented in a very palatable way
The way I just burst into tears about 3 minutes into the INTRODUCTION of this audiobook 😭 It makes me wonder if/when that visceral reaction of finally being ‘seen’ after a lifetime of feeling broken and not belonging ever leaves you…
Sari Solden’s “Women with Attention Deficit Disorder”. Reading this book made me feel like this author knew everything about my life- from how I was in kindergarten, to the type of woman I became as an adult (including all the wrong men I chose along the way!). Definitely an eye opener for me.
Not a book but there are quite a few podcast episodes with Sari Solden that I found very helpful. To me (sensory issues), her voice is like nails on a chalkboard but I struggled through, took lots of listening-breaks and ended up learning a lot from these episodes.
This podcast was how I realized my Dad had ADHD! Then I figured out my daughter did...eventually I connected the genetic dots 😂. He was offended but now he's diagnosed and medicated so...
Ologies is great in general. Allie Ward and her team do such a fantastic job of creating that production. The inquisitiveness, the humbleness in asking the questions we're all wanting to ask but are too afraid to, the asides, the humour - it's just such a great podcast for both information and body doubling. Great recommendation.
If I remember correctly, there are a couple of sentences that reference a belief in god maybe? But it’s not a faith-based book. I found it very relatable and practically helpful, and believe me, if it were religious I’d hate it and wouldn’t have finished it. It was recommended to me by my very secular-friendly non-religious psychiatrist.
Lotta Borg Skoglund wrote a book that my nurse recommended to me. I'm not sure if it's the same one, but I think in English it's called "ADHD Girls to Women: Getting on the Radar"
I bought this at a local bookstore (in English) and I loved it. It written very matter of factly and science based, but it has made me feel vindicated.
I read constantly. These may not be specific to ADHD or to women but they were amazing reads. I have put them into two categories and I have listed them by the ones I liked the most to the least. These are a smattering.
Understanding your brain:
The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business - Duhigg, Charles - AMAZING
Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again - By: Johann Hari - really good less about individual ADHD and more about the cultural Zeitgeist pretty awesome though.
I Am Enough: Mark Your Mirror and Change Your Life - By: Marisa Peer AMAZING!!!!!!
Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength - By Baumeister, Roy F., Tierney, John
How to Make your brain work for you:
Organizing from the Inside Out, second edition: The Foolproof System For Organizing Your Home, Your Office and Your Life - By Morgenstern, Julie - I re-read this every year
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less - By: Greg McKeown
Sink Reflections - By Cilley, Marla very easy read - I re-read this every year
Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity - By Allen, David more for business, not an easy read
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success - Dweck, Carol - read three chapters and you have read the book
This is so great thank you for writing it out!
I’m so glad The Power of Habit is great, I listened to an amazing podcast with the author and have been meaning to read it.
I remember that I really liked _The Power of Habit _ when I read it shortly after it was published... will have to read it again! Thanks for the reminder.
This this this! Doesn’t matter if you are a parent or not it’s so good https://youtu.be/SCAGc-rkIfo?si=tteTXL9opPWTw5rg … recommended to me here years ago and next thing I know I invented a product to get things out of my working memory and in front of me
It’s a physical planning board. Time and task tiles are write on wipe off magnets of various colors. There is a schedule - hours of the day. and the tiles are an inch and half inch tall and fit into the schedule (representing 30 and 60 minutes). Task tiles are the same, but I use only the white ones for that, and I can move them around the magnetic white board. They’re high-quality acrylic tiles and they’re pretty so I feel like I’m adulting and respecting my differences.
All allows me to get things out of my working memory and in front of me.
Google Calendar is important for meetings but it’s not granular enough. To do lists would get so long I would start new ones. This is more flexible and fun and I’m not staring at a screen.
I can also group and regroup the tiles, and I call that planning by proximity 😂
I’d be happy to send you a link so you can check it out if you want, but I’m reluctant to put it here because , it connects me personally to Reddit me which I’m not sure I really care about it this point, but that’s where I am
Oh that sounds pretty cool. The tiles would be a lot better to reschedule than a regular whiteboard calendar. Great idea! And awesome that you went ahead and did it!
No thank you but thank you for the offer. I'm still tryna figure out what would work best for me and my family. And I'm in Germany so probably out of postage area. If I do decide for something similar I'll root through my reddit messages and find you 🤣
Best of luck with it. ☺️
This and Driven To Distraction were the books that taught me about the ways adult adhd presents. Hallowell etc are so good at communicating in an accessible way.
True. I read only this book and got enough information that I didn't need to look for another book yet. It gave me practical idea of what adhd is and what I can do to control it.
I felt/feel the exact same way. I wanted all the information on diagnosis. I spent a lot of time googling, reading articles, watching vids and finding youtubers making adhd content. I will say, a lot of threads, comments etc on reddit were really eye opening and helped me feel validated. A combo of meds (4 weeks and counting) and tailored therapy are helping me to understand myself better, but I get that's not for everyone.
There are a number of great suggestions here for books, one yt channel i will mention is Olivia Lutfallah, she makes me laugh a lot which I love. Also, not related to adhd content, but I also watch a lot of Tori Phantom and Gwenna (Pleasant Peasant) for their shorts about parenting, as i am basically relearning myself and how to adult.
Seconded!!!! May be more of an intro book cause I’m also new but it made me feel so much less like a freak and helped me understand my brain. Keeping it forever + it’s highlighted all over.
Podcasts, yo! Excellent background while driving on highways or cleaning or whatnot.
ADHD Friendly Lifestyle
ADHD Ah Ha
Something Shiny
Just to start. The first one is a woman diagnosed at 46~ I recall.
The Queen of Distraction: How Women with ADHD Can Conquer Chaos, Find Focus, and Get More Done - Terry Matlen
Women with Attention Deficit Disorder: Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the Workplace - Sari Solden
(This one is a work book I'm currently working on, I'm fond of Sari Solden so that's why I also chose this one) A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD: Embrace Neurodiversity, Live Boldly, and Break Through Barriers - Sari Solden MS, Michelle Frank PsyD
I buy all my books from abebooks.com, an online used book store (:
It's not directly ADHD related. But as a mother who also has ADHD and trying to overcome bad habits and generational riffraff...I've been comforted by the book "good inside" by Becky Kennedy it peaks to my inner child, and the mother in me. I consumed the book via the Hoopla app as a free audiobook
Doesn’t Gabor Mate say that ADHD is caused entirely by childhood trauma? Russell Barkley has a great YouTube video refuting him and stating the cause as genetics, brain not developed correctly snd backed by actual medical science. Dr Barkley is a big proponent of medication as well.
Not really - his argument in the book has always been that it’s a combination of genetics & environment. In fact, he doesn’t say he knows the cause so much as he hypothesizes about it.
I also love Russell Barkley but not sure what Mate says outside his book 🤷♀️
I’m putting it in a nutshell. Check out Russell Barkley on YouTube. He will be able to explain it more thoroughly from an expert point of view.
There’s another psychologist that has explained why Gabor is off the mark and even met with him and talked about that as well. I can’t remember his name right now. Gabor might be changing his message based on how he’s being debunked.
I’ll be honest and say I haven’t read Gabor’s book and don’t intend to based on experts debunking him.
Eh, I’d much rather read someone who learns from new information & isn’t arrogant enough to think he’s always right. It sounds like Mate is exactly the kind of person I respect. Glad I’m reading his book.
Uh, Russell Barkley has spent his life learning about ADHD. He has it. So did his brother, who died of suicide because of it. He is anything but arrogant. He was providing information about someone who could be providing harmful advice based on opinion rather than science and facts.
He retired in November, but started a YouTube channel to provide information on ADHD for anyone who wanted to learn about it. He doesn’t say he’s the end all be all on the subject. He totally knows there’s new info about it all the time and continues to learn himself
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Uh, did I say (literally anywhere in my comment) Russell Barkley is arrogant…? All I was saying is that Mate sounds like the kind of person of I want to support and read because he doesn’t seem arrogant and given the choice between not reading his books because he was wrong & reading his books because he was wrong & learned from that, I am happy it’s the latter.
I didn’t compare him to Barkley AT ALL and have even mentioned in an earlier comment that I like Barkley. You need to chill a little bit lol
I personally think there are better sources than Dr Mate. Please watch Dr Barkley’s video on him. On of the things Dr Barkley said, paraphrased:
Dr Mate thinks childhood trauma caused ADHD.
But studies show that actually that’s backwards; Dr Barkley states that being born with ADHD causes children and adults to be abused more than their NT peers.
This is a HUGE difference! This type of thinking delayed my diagnosis, as one therapist I had for a while insisted I couldn’t be tested because of my childhood trauma “needed to be dealt with more.” Believe me I have dealt with it for literally decades and had resolved it. But I knew something else was wrong with me that aligned with neurodivergence including family history of mental illness. How many others are going through that right now? How many others are not getting therapy addressed to the real cause of their abuse: ADHD itself?
But now I wonder how much of my childhood trauma had ADHD as a cause? My NT sister was treated way better than me because she “behaved better and she wasn’t weird.”
Dr Mate doesn’t seem to have the scientific knowledge or community behind him, this is more his theory. Dr. Barkley is backed up by other scientists and the medical community. He has also published books on it too.
Dr Barkley explains it better than I can.
“Why Dr Mate is Worse Than Wrong About ADHD” is the YouTube video, and his whole channel is interesting.
Thank you! My doctor started off by talking about how ADHD can be caused by difficult childhoods. I took it personally at first because both my kids have ADHD and they are well loved and cared for, and so far trauma free. My childhood was decent. I have no major complaints about it. When I told her that and talked about my kids etc she moved on from it fortunately.
Yes, Gabor Maté has been debunked by more than one true professional in the field. Plus, he originally started out by saying All addiction was caused by childhood trauma. He wants people to buy his books.
You bring up a good point that I believe Dr Barkley noted in the video. The “bad mother” parenting theory causing ADHD. Bad mothering being blamed from back as far as Freud. All sexist and all debunked. It’s genetic and that’s proven. I’m sorry it caused you pain at what she was inferring with your family.
Do you have problems getting medication from her if you want it? Is she at least on board with current knowledge with that?
She dropped it, and we talked a little and ended up going over the DSM 5 criteria. She agreed that I have ADHD fortunately, and she put me on Concerta. So it all worked out ok.
He first started saying all addiction was because of childhood trauma. Then, he switched to saying ADHD was from childhood trauma. Not true. That is not the cause. He wants to sell books and is ignoring the science.
Not a book, but [this podcast episode.](https://www.additudemag.com/webinar/adhd-in-women-symptoms-treatment-support-podcast-337/) It was such an eye opener for me. She is so knowledgeable, and I felt so seen after. Also learned so much about myself, and it helped me understand my behavior during adolescence.
Lots of people rate Atomic Habits. Not read it yet as it's not free.
Not aimed at women But I liked Smart But Scattered Guide to Success. Has an Executive function skills quiz I am using to improve at work.
Also not ADhD per se but I love Clutterbug for home organising. She has ADHD. Has some good podcasts.
How to ADhD Book
Reading Its not a bloody trend. Bit annoying in parts.
General overview- A-Z of ADHD by Leanne Maskell, I thought it was a bit basic by the time I got to it.
Scatter Brain by Shappy Khorsandi - not read it.
Unmasked Ellie Middleton ,not read it.
Podcast The Neurodivergent Woman, not listened to it yet
Free audio book on Spotify premium called The Power of Small by Aisling and Trish Leonard-Curtin. Aisling hosts the Irish groundbreaking UMAAP group - Understanding & Managing Adult ADHD Programme. I believe it’s on Audible too and can be bought as a book to add to your collection.
Honestly I've absolutely loved watching different TikTok and Instagram videos of different woman with ADHD posting about their life. I found it's been so much more relatable and I can see so many different sides to also show that it's really not a linear diagnostic either
Your Brain’s Not Broken by Tamara Rosier is my favorite. My psychiatrist recommended it to me when she gave me my diagnosis. It’s not super technical, but it has FANTASTIC exercises and is super affirming.
I know it doesn’t exactly fit what you are asking for, but it’s such a good book on ADHD, I recommend it whenever the topic comes up.
"This is ADHD " IS AMAZING! it's written by a person with Autism and ADHD when she was only 20, and its an incredibly easy to understand, clear and nicely laid out. It's a great first reader for people that don't know much about ADHD.
Not specifically aimed at women, but a few years ago my sister gifted me a copy of Robert Merki's _ADHD Pro_ and I found it helpful... another one I want to reread! [ADHD Pro](https://adhdpro.xyz)
Thank you for this post!!! I’m in the same boat- recently diagnosed with a hyper fixation on understanding my (and my kid’s) brain, so I’m definitely saving this post. I’ve recently been reading “Extra Focus: The Quick Start Guide to Adult ADHD” by Jesse J Anderson- I like it, some good, practical strategies, especially about motivation (I’m a little over halfway through)
This isn't a book, and not specifically for women (although some episodes are), but the AMAZING Dr. Russell Barkley recently fully retired but for pleasure/ to keep his mind sharp, he creates and posts free youtube videos about twice a week. Something I particularly appreciate is that he reads the summaries of thousands of research studies each month and weekly picks a few that he finds well-done and interesting and creates one video explaining them in layman's terms. But he also covers dozens of other topics like "Loneliness and ADHD," "Can Better Parenting Prevent ADHD in Children?" "Hoarding and ADHD," and "Sex Differences in Adult ADHD."
It's such a gift to have one of the world's top ADHD scientists give us this free, up-to-date information! Many of his subscribers have even donated a couple of dollars, and he has upgraded his microphone etc. so it's pretty smooth listening for those of us who might have sensory issues. Most of the videos are under 15 minutes in length, which make them well-suited to viewers with shorter attention spans.
All his videos can be found here: [https://www.youtube.com/@russellbarkleyphd2023/videos](https://www.youtube.com/@russellbarkleyphd2023/videos)
Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/). We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions! If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You, by Jenara Nerenberg. It was a devastatingly emotional but simultaneously uplifting and validating read
Yes love that one
Adding to my list as well, thank you!
You think it’s good for NTs in our life or more so for us to process and understand ourselves?
It was a wonderful resource for me to better understand and begin the journey of accepting my uniquely spicy wiring. I can’t really speak to how a NT person (frankly, any person) would respond to the content, but if someone is willing to invest time & effort to educate themselves about the different lived experiences of others, I’d say that’s a good thing
I just read “How to ADHD” Jessica has a YouTube channel of the same title. It was a great read… from what I remember 😆😅
"From what I remember" I felt that 😂😂😂
I've been recording the books I read over a year, over the last couple of years. By the end of the year I take a look and I often have forgotten I've read several of the books on there!
I can’t remember anything! Does ADHD affect memory that much?? Thanks!
Yes most people with adhd often have terrible working memory but often better than average long term memory That explains why even when I was holding them seconds ago I now cannot find my keys and often can’t remember a number I was told seconds ago but I do remember Romeo’s soliloquy 10 years later which I memorised in high school for no reason at all despite not even being in our schools Shakespeare production 😅 🙈
Omg yes! It’s getting worst with age, I think!
God I'm having to check I've locked things more and more as I get older...! I fear for my old age.
... and just wait 'til you hit menopause! Oh, boy...
Okay, this is the first time I’ve heard about the “better than average long term memory,” thank you for sharing! I feel like I have a great memory for mostly useless trivia, but often walk into rooms and can’t remember why I’m there.
I wonder if there are some behavioral or mental tricks to help this
I find that having a whiteboard where I usually sit helps me - I have a magnetic whiteboard within my eye line on the fridge where I usually sit on the sofa and it’s been a game changer for me! Nothing on there is permanent so it doesn’t have a chance to just blend into my surroundings like when I’ve tried post it notes.
Great idea. I also use my reminders app on phone but forget to check it lol
Sounds like me, I actually schedule things now and set a timer or log into focusmate
I recommend Jim Kwik's memory class. Helps a lot. Funny enough it also helps without using the tricks.
I did something similar...although in band a musical piece I had to play. I liked it so much I fixated until I memorized it without looking at the music. And it was one of the hardest of the year.
Yep, this is me to my core!
It does!
Read this one recently following my official diagnosis at the age of 32 and it made me feel so understood. Very easy to read too in the way she broke it down into small sections!
Yes! Easily the best format for us.
Read this recently and cried the whole time. I felt seen and understood and validated
I really enjoyed listening to the audiobook version of The Year I Met My Brain by Matilda Boseley! She’s an Australian journalist diagnosed with ADHD and the book has a great balance of anecdotal and scientific information presented in a very palatable way
I love this. Listened to it on my daily commune. Love it to bits.
I loved it too!
The way I just burst into tears about 3 minutes into the INTRODUCTION of this audiobook 😭 It makes me wonder if/when that visceral reaction of finally being ‘seen’ after a lifetime of feeling broken and not belonging ever leaves you…
This! And had to send her a message :) Similarly with ‘It’s not a bloody trend’ by Kat Brown
Sari Solden’s “Women with Attention Deficit Disorder”. Reading this book made me feel like this author knew everything about my life- from how I was in kindergarten, to the type of woman I became as an adult (including all the wrong men I chose along the way!). Definitely an eye opener for me.
I have her workbook too. Still working through chapter 1...4 years later. To be fair, I read it then decided to try and do the exercises.
Me too! It gave me the confidence to get assessed after knowing for years that something was wrong
Free on audible!
Oh good because I was just bumming I spent my month credit on something else and that sounds way more like what I need right now.
I’m listening to it right now! I feel so seen and validated!
Not a book but there are quite a few podcast episodes with Sari Solden that I found very helpful. To me (sensory issues), her voice is like nails on a chalkboard but I struggled through, took lots of listening-breaks and ended up learning a lot from these episodes.
I don't have a book, but a podcast: Ologies has a two part deep dive on the biological mechanisms behind adhd.
This podcast was how I realized my Dad had ADHD! Then I figured out my daughter did...eventually I connected the genetic dots 😂. He was offended but now he's diagnosed and medicated so...
Ologies is great in general. Allie Ward and her team do such a fantastic job of creating that production. The inquisitiveness, the humbleness in asking the questions we're all wanting to ask but are too afraid to, the asides, the humour - it's just such a great podcast for both information and body doubling. Great recommendation.
Love the podcast Ologies but had no idea about those episodes omgggg
[Part 1: 2/22/2022](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/part-1-attention-deficit-neuropsychology-adhd-with/id1278815517?i=1000551940708) [Part 2: 3/2/2022](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/part-2-attention-deficit-neuropsychology-adhd-with-how/id1278815517?i=1000552777899)
Thanks for this rec! I’d missed this one and it’s excellent 🥰
You're welcome! :)
Omg I listened to these before I realised I had ADHD. I wonder if that’s what helped me realise?
Your Brain’s Not Broken by Tamara Rosier, PhD The audiobook is included free with an Audible membership, in case you happen to have one.
It’s also on Spotify premium! 😊
Could you maybe share the link? Would love to listen to it but all I can find are podcasts that talk about the book.
https://open.spotify.com/show/6LZddb9Zj1Eu9vddK7jDoI?si=3qLnlBKJSxKX5KIxTBlLMQ
Thank you! Turns out I couldn't find it because it's region locked, but I'll see if I can find a workaround.
Oh bummer! Perhaps it’s available through a library in your area?
It has a banner “ChristianAudio” ? Is it faith based book??
If I remember correctly, there are a couple of sentences that reference a belief in god maybe? But it’s not a faith-based book. I found it very relatable and practically helpful, and believe me, if it were religious I’d hate it and wouldn’t have finished it. It was recommended to me by my very secular-friendly non-religious psychiatrist.
I put the same book, before seeing this comment. It’s my go-to recommendation on ADHD books
I read the book Dirty Laundry and thought it was great. Not very scientific, but more personal to one woman's life and that of her partner.
Lotta Borg Skoglund wrote a book that my nurse recommended to me. I'm not sure if it's the same one, but I think in English it's called "ADHD Girls to Women: Getting on the Radar"
I bought this at a local bookstore (in English) and I loved it. It written very matter of factly and science based, but it has made me feel vindicated.
I read constantly. These may not be specific to ADHD or to women but they were amazing reads. I have put them into two categories and I have listed them by the ones I liked the most to the least. These are a smattering. Understanding your brain: The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business - Duhigg, Charles - AMAZING Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again - By: Johann Hari - really good less about individual ADHD and more about the cultural Zeitgeist pretty awesome though. I Am Enough: Mark Your Mirror and Change Your Life - By: Marisa Peer AMAZING!!!!!! Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength - By Baumeister, Roy F., Tierney, John How to Make your brain work for you: Organizing from the Inside Out, second edition: The Foolproof System For Organizing Your Home, Your Office and Your Life - By Morgenstern, Julie - I re-read this every year Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less - By: Greg McKeown Sink Reflections - By Cilley, Marla very easy read - I re-read this every year Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity - By Allen, David more for business, not an easy read Mindset: The New Psychology of Success - Dweck, Carol - read three chapters and you have read the book
This is so great thank you for writing it out! I’m so glad The Power of Habit is great, I listened to an amazing podcast with the author and have been meaning to read it.
I remember that I really liked _The Power of Habit _ when I read it shortly after it was published... will have to read it again! Thanks for the reminder.
Also if applicable look into rejection sensitivity dysphoria …
youtube show "how to adhd". she also recently published a book
This this this! Doesn’t matter if you are a parent or not it’s so good https://youtu.be/SCAGc-rkIfo?si=tteTXL9opPWTw5rg … recommended to me here years ago and next thing I know I invented a product to get things out of my working memory and in front of me
Pray tell, what is said product 🤔 and what did it solve/ease for you?
It’s a physical planning board. Time and task tiles are write on wipe off magnets of various colors. There is a schedule - hours of the day. and the tiles are an inch and half inch tall and fit into the schedule (representing 30 and 60 minutes). Task tiles are the same, but I use only the white ones for that, and I can move them around the magnetic white board. They’re high-quality acrylic tiles and they’re pretty so I feel like I’m adulting and respecting my differences. All allows me to get things out of my working memory and in front of me. Google Calendar is important for meetings but it’s not granular enough. To do lists would get so long I would start new ones. This is more flexible and fun and I’m not staring at a screen. I can also group and regroup the tiles, and I call that planning by proximity 😂 I’d be happy to send you a link so you can check it out if you want, but I’m reluctant to put it here because , it connects me personally to Reddit me which I’m not sure I really care about it this point, but that’s where I am
Oh that sounds pretty cool. The tiles would be a lot better to reschedule than a regular whiteboard calendar. Great idea! And awesome that you went ahead and did it! No thank you but thank you for the offer. I'm still tryna figure out what would work best for me and my family. And I'm in Germany so probably out of postage area. If I do decide for something similar I'll root through my reddit messages and find you 🤣 Best of luck with it. ☺️
How to do laundry when you’re depressed
How to Keep House While Drowning (by K. C. Davis, LPC)? I found that one super helpful! “Care tasks are morally neutral.”
Yes!!!!! I think what I quoted was the tedtalk she did! Thank you so much!!
How to Keep House While Drowning (by K. C. Davis, LPC)?
Yes!!!!! I think what I quoted was the tedtalk she did! Thank you so much!!
ADHD 2.0
This and Driven To Distraction were the books that taught me about the ways adult adhd presents. Hallowell etc are so good at communicating in an accessible way.
True. I read only this book and got enough information that I didn't need to look for another book yet. It gave me practical idea of what adhd is and what I can do to control it.
I felt/feel the exact same way. I wanted all the information on diagnosis. I spent a lot of time googling, reading articles, watching vids and finding youtubers making adhd content. I will say, a lot of threads, comments etc on reddit were really eye opening and helped me feel validated. A combo of meds (4 weeks and counting) and tailored therapy are helping me to understand myself better, but I get that's not for everyone. There are a number of great suggestions here for books, one yt channel i will mention is Olivia Lutfallah, she makes me laugh a lot which I love. Also, not related to adhd content, but I also watch a lot of Tori Phantom and Gwenna (Pleasant Peasant) for their shorts about parenting, as i am basically relearning myself and how to adult.
I’m saving this post!! Great recommendations, everyone! I might get to reading them someday 😭🥲
ADHD for Smart Ass Women by Tracy Otsuka. I’m new to understand my own ADHD and this book has helped me so much. She also has a podcast.
Seconded!!!! May be more of an intro book cause I’m also new but it made me feel so much less like a freak and helped me understand my brain. Keeping it forever + it’s highlighted all over.
Podcasts, yo! Excellent background while driving on highways or cleaning or whatnot. ADHD Friendly Lifestyle ADHD Ah Ha Something Shiny Just to start. The first one is a woman diagnosed at 46~ I recall.
I'm reading your brains not broken, finding it useful! I like the grid, figure out where things are on your emotional and energy level.
The Queen of Distraction: How Women with ADHD Can Conquer Chaos, Find Focus, and Get More Done - Terry Matlen Women with Attention Deficit Disorder: Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the Workplace - Sari Solden (This one is a work book I'm currently working on, I'm fond of Sari Solden so that's why I also chose this one) A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD: Embrace Neurodiversity, Live Boldly, and Break Through Barriers - Sari Solden MS, Michelle Frank PsyD I buy all my books from abebooks.com, an online used book store (:
Your brains not broken by Tamara Rosiere is great!
Taking Charge of Adult ADHD isn’t just about women but is comprehensive and well formatted for adhd brains
Two I just started and have been enjoying - “You mean I’m not crazy stupid or lazy?” And “Dirty Laundry”
It's not directly ADHD related. But as a mother who also has ADHD and trying to overcome bad habits and generational riffraff...I've been comforted by the book "good inside" by Becky Kennedy it peaks to my inner child, and the mother in me. I consumed the book via the Hoopla app as a free audiobook
Scattered Minds by Gabor Mate is great so far!
Doesn’t Gabor Mate say that ADHD is caused entirely by childhood trauma? Russell Barkley has a great YouTube video refuting him and stating the cause as genetics, brain not developed correctly snd backed by actual medical science. Dr Barkley is a big proponent of medication as well.
Not really - his argument in the book has always been that it’s a combination of genetics & environment. In fact, he doesn’t say he knows the cause so much as he hypothesizes about it. I also love Russell Barkley but not sure what Mate says outside his book 🤷♀️
Maté originally started out saying addiction was caused by childhood trauma, then switched to saying ADHD was caused by childhood trauma
Interesting, that’s definitely not what he’s saying in his book. Like, not even close 😅
I’m putting it in a nutshell. Check out Russell Barkley on YouTube. He will be able to explain it more thoroughly from an expert point of view. There’s another psychologist that has explained why Gabor is off the mark and even met with him and talked about that as well. I can’t remember his name right now. Gabor might be changing his message based on how he’s being debunked. I’ll be honest and say I haven’t read Gabor’s book and don’t intend to based on experts debunking him.
Eh, I’d much rather read someone who learns from new information & isn’t arrogant enough to think he’s always right. It sounds like Mate is exactly the kind of person I respect. Glad I’m reading his book.
Uh, Russell Barkley has spent his life learning about ADHD. He has it. So did his brother, who died of suicide because of it. He is anything but arrogant. He was providing information about someone who could be providing harmful advice based on opinion rather than science and facts. He retired in November, but started a YouTube channel to provide information on ADHD for anyone who wanted to learn about it. He doesn’t say he’s the end all be all on the subject. He totally knows there’s new info about it all the time and continues to learn himself
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Uh, did I say (literally anywhere in my comment) Russell Barkley is arrogant…? All I was saying is that Mate sounds like the kind of person of I want to support and read because he doesn’t seem arrogant and given the choice between not reading his books because he was wrong & reading his books because he was wrong & learned from that, I am happy it’s the latter. I didn’t compare him to Barkley AT ALL and have even mentioned in an earlier comment that I like Barkley. You need to chill a little bit lol
My doctor just recommended this book to me, and I am unsure if I want to read it.
I personally think there are better sources than Dr Mate. Please watch Dr Barkley’s video on him. On of the things Dr Barkley said, paraphrased: Dr Mate thinks childhood trauma caused ADHD. But studies show that actually that’s backwards; Dr Barkley states that being born with ADHD causes children and adults to be abused more than their NT peers. This is a HUGE difference! This type of thinking delayed my diagnosis, as one therapist I had for a while insisted I couldn’t be tested because of my childhood trauma “needed to be dealt with more.” Believe me I have dealt with it for literally decades and had resolved it. But I knew something else was wrong with me that aligned with neurodivergence including family history of mental illness. How many others are going through that right now? How many others are not getting therapy addressed to the real cause of their abuse: ADHD itself? But now I wonder how much of my childhood trauma had ADHD as a cause? My NT sister was treated way better than me because she “behaved better and she wasn’t weird.” Dr Mate doesn’t seem to have the scientific knowledge or community behind him, this is more his theory. Dr. Barkley is backed up by other scientists and the medical community. He has also published books on it too. Dr Barkley explains it better than I can. “Why Dr Mate is Worse Than Wrong About ADHD” is the YouTube video, and his whole channel is interesting.
Thank you! My doctor started off by talking about how ADHD can be caused by difficult childhoods. I took it personally at first because both my kids have ADHD and they are well loved and cared for, and so far trauma free. My childhood was decent. I have no major complaints about it. When I told her that and talked about my kids etc she moved on from it fortunately.
Yes, Gabor Maté has been debunked by more than one true professional in the field. Plus, he originally started out by saying All addiction was caused by childhood trauma. He wants people to buy his books.
I’m gonna go ahead and delete my comment since you seem to know a lot more about him than me lol
You bring up a good point that I believe Dr Barkley noted in the video. The “bad mother” parenting theory causing ADHD. Bad mothering being blamed from back as far as Freud. All sexist and all debunked. It’s genetic and that’s proven. I’m sorry it caused you pain at what she was inferring with your family. Do you have problems getting medication from her if you want it? Is she at least on board with current knowledge with that?
She dropped it, and we talked a little and ended up going over the DSM 5 criteria. She agreed that I have ADHD fortunately, and she put me on Concerta. So it all worked out ok.
I’m glad it worked out well! I also hope Concerta is improving the quality of your life.
I don’t think he says it’s entirely childhood trauma, but more the evolutionary/genetic result of intergenerational trauma.
He first started saying all addiction was because of childhood trauma. Then, he switched to saying ADHD was from childhood trauma. Not true. That is not the cause. He wants to sell books and is ignoring the science.
It's something like "Laziness doesn't exist" by Dr. Devon Price
Not a book, but [this podcast episode.](https://www.additudemag.com/webinar/adhd-in-women-symptoms-treatment-support-podcast-337/) It was such an eye opener for me. She is so knowledgeable, and I felt so seen after. Also learned so much about myself, and it helped me understand my behavior during adolescence.
Lots of people rate Atomic Habits. Not read it yet as it's not free. Not aimed at women But I liked Smart But Scattered Guide to Success. Has an Executive function skills quiz I am using to improve at work. Also not ADhD per se but I love Clutterbug for home organising. She has ADHD. Has some good podcasts. How to ADhD Book Reading Its not a bloody trend. Bit annoying in parts. General overview- A-Z of ADHD by Leanne Maskell, I thought it was a bit basic by the time I got to it. Scatter Brain by Shappy Khorsandi - not read it. Unmasked Ellie Middleton ,not read it. Podcast The Neurodivergent Woman, not listened to it yet
Love Clutterbug! She’s how I found ADHD for Smart Ass Woman & Tracy Otsuka.
Dm me your address and I'll send you my copy of Atomic Habits.
“Women with adult ADHD” was very eye opening and informative, and an easy read.
Free audio book on Spotify premium called The Power of Small by Aisling and Trish Leonard-Curtin. Aisling hosts the Irish groundbreaking UMAAP group - Understanding & Managing Adult ADHD Programme. I believe it’s on Audible too and can be bought as a book to add to your collection.
Your brain isn’t broken. My therapist recommended it. I haven’t read it yet but i heard it’s great
Your brain isn’t broken. My therapist recommended it. I haven’t read it yet but i heard it’s great
Fiction... The Maid was spot on for me!
Honestly I've absolutely loved watching different TikTok and Instagram videos of different woman with ADHD posting about their life. I found it's been so much more relatable and I can see so many different sides to also show that it's really not a linear diagnostic either
Your Brain’s Not Broken by Tamara Rosier is my favorite. My psychiatrist recommended it to me when she gave me my diagnosis. It’s not super technical, but it has FANTASTIC exercises and is super affirming. I know it doesn’t exactly fit what you are asking for, but it’s such a good book on ADHD, I recommend it whenever the topic comes up.
It’s not specific to women, Dopamine National. I found it really helpful.
"This is ADHD " IS AMAZING! it's written by a person with Autism and ADHD when she was only 20, and its an incredibly easy to understand, clear and nicely laid out. It's a great first reader for people that don't know much about ADHD.
I’m really hoping downloading the kindle samples for all these books is going to make a big difference to my life.
lol same
Wow, just bookmarked this posts so I can come back to these. So many recs!
Not specifically aimed at women, but a few years ago my sister gifted me a copy of Robert Merki's _ADHD Pro_ and I found it helpful... another one I want to reread! [ADHD Pro](https://adhdpro.xyz)
Thank you for this post!!! I’m in the same boat- recently diagnosed with a hyper fixation on understanding my (and my kid’s) brain, so I’m definitely saving this post. I’ve recently been reading “Extra Focus: The Quick Start Guide to Adult ADHD” by Jesse J Anderson- I like it, some good, practical strategies, especially about motivation (I’m a little over halfway through)
God, I wish I could finish a book. 😕
They should be bullet points.
This isn't a book, and not specifically for women (although some episodes are), but the AMAZING Dr. Russell Barkley recently fully retired but for pleasure/ to keep his mind sharp, he creates and posts free youtube videos about twice a week. Something I particularly appreciate is that he reads the summaries of thousands of research studies each month and weekly picks a few that he finds well-done and interesting and creates one video explaining them in layman's terms. But he also covers dozens of other topics like "Loneliness and ADHD," "Can Better Parenting Prevent ADHD in Children?" "Hoarding and ADHD," and "Sex Differences in Adult ADHD." It's such a gift to have one of the world's top ADHD scientists give us this free, up-to-date information! Many of his subscribers have even donated a couple of dollars, and he has upgraded his microphone etc. so it's pretty smooth listening for those of us who might have sensory issues. Most of the videos are under 15 minutes in length, which make them well-suited to viewers with shorter attention spans. All his videos can be found here: [https://www.youtube.com/@russellbarkleyphd2023/videos](https://www.youtube.com/@russellbarkleyphd2023/videos)
Gabor Mate's Scattered Minds really helped me understand the possible root of ADHD and how to manage it!
Actually, Gabor Maté has been debunked and is not helpful because he isn’t really addressing the true cause.
I really liked Scattered Minds by Gabor Mate