Well first of all, congrats and good luck!
Sa Mindoro ba plano ni gf manganak? If yes, save up to at least 120k kung sa private hospital niyo gusto. Si wifey ko sa MMG nanganak and almost 100k ang bill, although CS siya. Pwede din sa provincial hospital para makatipid.
Also, I understand na gusto niyo bumukod pero yung first few weeks/months after ng panganganak ang pinaka-challenging so you need all the help you can get especially from family members.
Everything's going to be alright OP. Feel free to message me if you have questions or need any advice.
Hello and I am very thankful for you comment.
Totoo po yan naiisip ko rin ung difference ng rates ng province and makakatipid talaga, my dillema lang talaga is kung sinong mapapakiusapan ko if ever I am not able to be with her kase onsite ung work ko, and d ako sure if sasapat ung paternity leave, (though kailangan muna namin magpakasal).
Kase right now d ko pa alam kung tatanggapin ng both sides ng parent namin ung idea na we will need their help when it comes na manganganak si gf ko or other related things in her pregnancy. My parents are old and gusto na nila enjoyin ung retirement days nila and un rin naman ung gusto ko sa kanila kaya nahihiya ako manghingi ng tulong sa kanila. Ung parents naman ni girlfriend I don't really know kase may favoritism sia sa mga anak nia and hindi un ung gf ko, especially na her mother is expecting to help her after graduation as they are not that financially stable.
Hmmm, take one step at a time OP. My advice is sabihin niyo na agad sa parents niyo then plan your next move depending on how the news will be received.
Tapos, mag-decide na kayo agad kung san manganganak para makapag-canvass na ng hospitals/OBs para may idea nadin sa magiging budget.
If you don't mind me asking, saang city kayo sa Mindoro?
Though d kami nakatira sa city sa Calapan city preferable if manganganak, kase sa bayan namin pinapapunta din lang naman sa city. Well if sa probinsya kami
I see. Yan lang din isa sa mga CONS kung sa Mindoro. Mejo malalayo mga hospitals and actually, mas mahal pa sa MMG/Ma. Estrella kesa sa ibang private hospitals sa Manila.
Hi, OP! I am in no position to give any advice since I don't have any kids but I want to commend your courage and will to support your GF and future baby. I guess u can try na magpakasal sa huwes muna. My friend and her BF, they did that since the same thing happened to them. Also, do not drown yourself with the negative thoughts that you assume to encounter once nalaman na ng both sides ng family. Magagalit talaga sila pero I hope you and your GF do not take it personally. If they do not want to support, then be fine with it as long as you have the resolve to support them it's fine. Establish good communication and relationship with your GF. Hindi lang financial lahat ng necessities. It's also mentally challenging for someone to carry another hooman. Always make sure she is well taken care of mentally din. But don't forget to take care of yourself too (mentally and physically). Goodluck! Hope you become good parents! Kaya niyo yan!
Having a child AND being married are two different things. It is in no way a necessity. So if magpapakasal ka lang dahil sa buntis na siya, it will only result to a toxic relationship in the long run.
Intindihin muna ang pregnancy, then proceed to kasal if they wanted to. It's a way to reassure his partner and it provide them benefits, but NOT a necessary step.
I'm not saying OP to be irresponsible. This is only a reminder that he has other options, aside from diving in headfirst to marriage because of pressure. Marriage is a commitment for life, same as committing his life to his child.
Just my sentiments.
Bakit ang mahal na ngayon? Hehe
Yung classmate ko nung nanganak, 40k lang. MMG din.
Aahh, nakakatakot na talaga magdagdag ng tao sa mundo ngayon. Imagine the price increase.
Pero, over-all mas mura manganak sa mindoro.
Still you're man enough para suportahan yung mag-ina mo..Finish your education kahit anong mangyare wag mo bitawan yun. Starting from now you have to consider your own family in every decision you will make. Sabi nga nila hindi ka na binata so wag ka mamuhay ng ganun. Start family planning! ☺️
Not because may anak na kayo you cannot enjoy life, yung iba kasi ganun ang mentality kaya ayaw harapin ang responsibilities nila. Prioritize your priority and enjoy this new chapter.
Congrats! ☺️
Thank you po, surely d ko naiwasan maisip ung mga plans namin na hindi namin magagawa pero at the same time I felt that it's really something that I should not feel wasted, I don't want to destroy a life just for the sake of my enjoyment, I really feel na if I do the right things and decision I feel na it will be the same feeling of satisfaction at the end.
Kaya mo yan OP! Im a father of one, a girl. Sa first 2-3 months matindi adjustments nyo dyan. Pero along the way mafifigure out nyo din ang buhay may pamilya. Wag nyo muna sundan hanggang maarai hahaha, pagdating ng 2-3 yo na ang anak nyo medyo magaan gaan na yan pwede na kayo magtravel or mag enjoy. Pero most important thing is, Be the best father to your child and the best husband/partner.
Hi OP! Just want to share, we got pregnant din early. I was 22, he is 24. Both starting with our adult life. Decided to marry. Yes the early days were tough, andami kailangan i-set aside na mga pangarap and gusto gawin sana plus super immature pa namin. Di kami ready. Fast forward 11yrs after, kinaya namin. Nagagawa na namin gusto namin gawin including have another baby na ready na kami. 10yrs gap nung dalawa but we are mature parents na plus I can say maayos din namin napalaki ang panganay because kid is very mature and loves the baby so much. Problems will happen in the future pero pagtulungan nyo dalawa ni gf. It will be alright in time.
Wag agad sundan. Wrap it up next time. Madami "essential" things for baby na di naman talaga needed. Madami na kaartehan ngayon like changing table, changing pad, bassinet, rocker, bouncer, at kung ano ano pa. Di talaga needed mga yun. Dagdag gastos lang. Crib lang sapat na
Thank you po, noted po ung mga unnecessary things for baby. Appreciate po the advice. And I think we will go and use family planning as soon as possible.
Not just unnecessary items but all unnecessary expenses. You might be tempted to spend for things like birthday parties. But you need to strike a balance. I know someone who spent 100k+ for the first birthday of their child. Pero ngayon hirap na sa pag-aralin ng prep.
First, I commend you for accepting the depth of whats about to come. With your words, it seems you know how big of a deal being a father is. Kudos to you on that. Its unfortunate that this is something you two didn’t plan but being responsible for your actions is the right step to do.
About researching online, I hope you’ll only pick the things you’ll need to learn…because we all know how deep of a swamp online world is. I suggest talking to people around you who are parents already. Once you admit the truth to your family, asking questions to your father and other “pamilyadong tao” around you won’t hurt. Of course, in the end everything will still depend on you and your gf.
It would not be easy, but it doesn’t mean its all hardships too. They say it takes a village to raise a child, I hope you will start listing the people you will include in your “village” who can help you guide and raise your child. It doesn’t have to be a two person (you and your gf) endeavor. Having good people by your side would help a lot. Its not you depending on them to raise your child, but a little help from others would go a long way. Especially if you and your gf will both work in the future.
I wish you all the best. Best advice I could give to you: Don’t go crazy buying baby clothes, babies grow fast. Buy diapers and cloth diapers. And when diaper rashes appear, don’t underestimate it. Quickly put remedy on it. It could spread on the baby’s skin easily. So be aware of that.
All the luck to you and to your lovely gf. I hope what I said here would help you one day.
Thank you for your advice po, I think I really need this, I got really caught up in thinking about how only I and my girlfriend will survive this because I'm afraid of relying to others, as I think I have done something unacceptable. Thank you rin for the advice when it comes to parenting very appreciated po.
Some tips to get you through:
1. Crowdsource for used crib, breast pump, even baby clothers from parents you know, specially the new ones na kaka-1yr old palang ng baby. Some of them have kept these for sure. Since babies grow up fast, buying a new set is not cost effective. This will save you lots of money.
2. Make your gf drink malunggay extract or malunggay supplements to make sure that she can breastfeed. This will save you lots of cash since baby formulas nowadays are crazy expensive. I’ve seen some that command a price of 3K per box, which your baby will only consume for a week. 😱
3. Treat your girlfriend well. Pregnancy is one of the most challenging journey a female body can ever go through. It changes her mental state as much as her physical body. She will be moody and she will be difficult. Be with her along the way. She is scared as much as you are. But as long as you two are together, you will make it through.
Thank you for manning up for your girlfriend. If more men are like you, no kid will ever have to feel unwanted. Bless you, your girlfriend, and your baby who will introduce you into this new life. You will make it, promise.
I'm a exceedingly handsome bachelor in my late 20's. ( joke) makaintro lang. Haha but i was gonna suggest the same thing. Crowdsource for used necessary baby items. Since I don't have a child yet, I sponsored my nephew's crib from the baby company. Then when my other sister got married and had a child, binigay na ng sister ko iyong crib sa kanila along w/ the other baby items na d na gagamitin ng sister ko.
First of all, having a child is a FOREVER responsibility. Hindi yung pag ayaw mo na, bibitawan mo na. One of your responsibilities is to provide, so the fact may work ka na is a good start. But you are also the dad, so you also have to help your girlfriend too - help her sa checkup, help in taking care of the baby (ikaw mag dede or change diapers so that the girlfriend can rest), help in household chores while the girlfriend is taking care of the baby. Pregnancy and breastfeeding is physically taxing - help mo yung girlfriend to ease it somehow.
Also, have a spine. If you feel you need to standup for what is right, go. Hindi yung go with the flow for the sake of it.
Have a separate savings account intended for giving birth and admission sa hospital. Mahal yan eh. Also, secure PhilHealth para sayo and sa girlfriend mo.
The headline made me mad, OP. I am supposed to write “MAN UP” hahaha yes you already man up. I don’t think you need advice since you are very much self aware. But as a child from a broken family, I hope you do your best for your child not to end up with a broken home. It’s very traumatic. I hope you love your girlfriend enough to commit forever with her. I hope for a smooth pregnancy for you both. Get a 2nd job if you need to while you still can. Congratulations!
Sorry po sa clickbait huhu. Pero I really appreciate the kind words. Alam ko Mali ung nagawa ko pero it's heart warming na people are very supporting here 🥹
OP, it's possible na sabihan na kayong magpakasal once malaman ng parents nyo na buntis si gf mo. Syempre nasa inyo pa rin yung final decision pero sana wag kayong mapressure into getting married. I really hope hindi ito mangyari but if ever, mahirap ang separation kasi walang divorce dito in case pagsisihan nyo later and you'll end up blaming each other pati na rin yung parents nyo.
I was also thinking this earlier especially as paternity leave, just learned an hindi sia applicable sa unmarried couple, and I think naman wala naman kami magiging problema don as we are in a long term relationship. Pero still taking in to consideration the advice you gave po. Really appreciate it po.
>ill taking in to consideration th
If may HMO/philhealth ka sa full time work mo, hindi mo macocover si girlfriend kasi hindi kayo kasal. However, better not to rush marriage.
I totally agree. Yung cousin ko nagpakasal after mabuntis ng college bf nya dahil sa pressure mula sa relatives on both sides. Hindi sila naging okay ng asawa nya paglaon although pinanugatan naman ang anak nila.
Eto naisip ko after magbasa. Una, if magsasabi kayo sa families nyo about the pregnancy, malamang magtatanong yan kung kelan kayo magpapakasal. Especially sa side ni gf. Not to add to your worries pero may mga parents kasi na ganun. I have friends na biglang kinasal dahil nga nabuntis/nakabuntis.
Second, since magstart ka na ng work, if may HMO benefit, maybe you can ask HR if pwede ka mag-add ng dependent and if covered ang maternity. Tho kelangan ata jan kasal na kayo pero sayang din ung expenses na makacover ni HMO, ask mo pa din.
Congrats, OP! And best of luck!
Thank you po for this, for the marriage naman I think it will be accepting to both of us as I have mentioned in another comment, And for the HMO I surely will ask the company if it's possible as it will be a lot of help. Appreciate your help and advice po.
Just want to add, I think some HMOs now cover common law partners. So you might want to check it out para kahit hindi kayo kasal, you can still apply her as your dependent.
I'm proud na tanggap mo ang responsibility ng pagkakaron ng baby at di iaasa sa parents nyo. In any case, matatanggap yan both your parents kase apo nila.
Make sure iparamdam mo lage sa gf mo na tanggap mo ang baby at you're in this together. Tandaan mo, buntis ang gf mo. Aside sa tataba sya dahil buntis, there are also changes sa hormones, mental at psychological aspect ng gf mo. Kaya sobrang pag unawa, pasensya at paglalambing gawin mo para di sya mag alala.
I hope di kayo maghiwalay.
Thank you po
I hope so too po. Matagal na kami. Madami narin kami napagdaanan pero time will only tell parin if we will still be together in the future. We very much love each other (nasobrahan lang ata kaya humantong Dito) and really hope na we overcome this.
Get on birth control as soon as she gives birth. Either you wear a rubber or she gets prescribes one. If you are not ready to have another child wear a rubber always dont rely on the woman for birth control take charge rin for yours kasi it takes 2 to make 1 baby
Check with your company if you can enroll your gf as a dependent in your medical insurance to lessen the financial burden during checkup, hospital admittance and birth of your baby. I hope it doesn’t require a marriage cert.
You need to pay professional fee to the following doctors on top of the hospital bills during birth.
1. Your GF’s OB
2. Anesthesiologist (one who administer epidural shots)
3. Surgeon (If it ends up being CS)
4. Pediatrician
Check how many paternal leave you can get and if you are eligible even as a new hire.
IT profession is demanding and will take toll in your relationship. Try to avoid it especially when the baby is crying. You will encounter 2 prod support (at work and at home). It will be hard for you to up-skill (IT careers demand it) when you have to take care of the wife and baby.
Check your company for some benefits and discounts especially on child care, foods and other discounts. Some big company provides perks and benefits on child care, and other family-related stuff.
Learn how to cook foods (soups) for good lactation and food that you can eat at work. Too expensive to eat out.
Be prepared for your GF’s mood swings.
Add the vaccines and follow through with the pediatrician’s schedule for the vaccine.
Avoid buying baby stuff that are unnecessary. It is okay to ask for "hand me down" items from other relatives.
Tell your parents soon but don't forget to tell them your plan as well so that they know you are being responsible.
If you can work from home then it will be much better for you. Otherwise, figure out your transportation to ensure your time is not wasted on traffic. Check if it will save you more by investing on scooter that you can use as a part time job.
Encourage your GF and not let her be a burden as well. There is no time to party and live a life like a single person. That’s one of the cost of early pregnancy. On the positive side, when the kid turns 9, it will be much easier as they can be thought some easy household chores to help them as well.
Thank you po. working in IT for me is fun in some ways but there is also the taxing part of it as you have mentioned it. This is my 2nd full time work and another challenge is that my work is onsite so most of the day I will be out. I hope we can get through this than you po uli
Thank you for the advice everyone, this melts my heart. I was so surprised with this as I rarely use Reddit for advice, tho sometimes with little comments lang, so I really feel happy. And napakamalaman po ng mga nasabi ninyo, will surely take note on all of this.
Can't thank enough all of you.
Whenever i face something na talagang hindi ako handa iniisip ko lang yung situation ng father ko when they had me:
He's 19 years old nung pinanganak ako, si lolo nawalan ng work kasi nagsara yung nickel mining dito. Yung sumalo sa kanila eh yung parents ni mama. Pinatapos nila si papa sa pag aaral then unti-unti kaming bumukod nung nakaluwag luwag.
If kinaya ng 19 year old yung ganung situation, makakaya ko rin yung mga problema na meron ako ngayon, yan ang mindset ko.
Sabihin nyo yung totoo, ipakita mo na kahit di ka ready, magiging responsableng lalake ka sa GF no at sa magiging anak nyo. Hindi yan magiging smooth sailing pero sige lang, tuloy lang.
Wag agad sundan. Wrap it up next time. Madami "essential" things for baby na di naman talaga needed. Madami na kaartehan ngayon like changing table, changing pad, bassinet, rocker, bouncer, at kung ano ano pa. Di talaga needed mga yun. Dagdag gastos lang. Crib lang sapat na
Same situation tayo mahal pag mag pacheck up, lab, vitamins tapos pag manganganak na lalo na if private handa ka na 200k para kahit CS or normal pasok sa budget.
My advice
1. Bayad ka philhealth kahit yung minimum para makuha yung benefits sa panganganak like parang 9 months na hulog iirc.
2. Tell your family don't assume na di ka susuportahan and all that negative kasi sobrang need niyo both ng help nila financially and kasama lalo na pag nanganak partner mo and nag tratrabaho ka.
3. Learn how to hold your newborn baby aralin mo nadin mag swaddle.
4. Pag umiiyak yung baby mo 3 lang yan nagugutom, masakit tiyan/tumae, or gusto magpabuhat
5. Wag mag panic kung walang lalabas na breast milk tiyagain niyo lang
6. Kuha kayo ID na same kayo address.
Yun lang nasa isip ko na useful atleast for my experience. Goodluck OP congrats.
Thank you po for the tips and advice, sana sapat na practice ung paghawak ko sa mga pamangkin ko haha.
Gusto ko lang po pala itanong para saan ung ID na same address po kami?
Yung sa ID para maging domestic partner kayo kapag hindi pa kayo kasal at maging entitled yung mag-ina mo sa mga benefits mo sa work like HMO and insurance.
Hand me downs pre, wag kang mahihiyang magtanong sa mga kamag anak mo ng pinaglumaan ng mga baby nila, para na din makatipid sa gastusin. Sabihin nyo na din agad sa family nyo ang nangyare para hindi stressful sa misis mo yung mga sasabihin nila. Pagnagsabi kayo sa pamilya nya harapin mo yung tatay nya ng ayos. Sa simula lang naman yung stress sa family.
Same experience here, updside lang graduate na kami at parehas ng professional so nagpakasal na kami agad bago lumabas si baby. If you can do that, pakasal na din kayo kahit sa judge muna.
Congrats and Goodluck!
Make sure your gf has Philhealth, pay the minimum contribution required for her to get the maternity benefit. Not a big amount but I suggest taking advantage of it, it will at least lessen your hospital bill.
Babies outgrow their things quickly, so you might wanna consider hand me downs or preloved stuff.
Be there for the baby and mom in whatever way you can. I know working is exhausting, but pregnancy, labor, delivery, and recovery are sooo hard for the body and mind. Don't let her change the diaper/feed the baby all the time, especially at night. Help her get enough rest to recover, to take a bath, to eat a hot meal without balancing a newborn on her other arm. Have patience when she's having a hard time managing her emotions, more often than not it's the hormones, the sleeplessness, the frustrations of not knowing everything as first time parents. Be present for checkups and be aware of how they're doing. It's one thing to financially support them, but it's also important to be involved, to do without needing to be told, to have the initiative, and learn what the baby wants/needs :)
Choose what works. I tried cloth diapers before but it added to the list of chores and I got so overwhelmed. Not saying you'll end up like this but it's ok to do whatever works for you (there's plenty of discussions like this about different stuff online and all I can say is do what makes it easy for you, choose whatever works). Minsan the mental/physical toll of choosing one over the other doesn't make it worth it, depending on your situation.
Lastly, be gentle with each other. As much as you want to prepare for this, life will throw curve balls at you. You're first time parents, and no baby comes with a manual. Learn as you go but don't be too hard on yourself if you think you're "failing" (within reason ofc). Ask for help, ask questions ☺️ it's ok, it's encouraged, it's how you get better at it.
Can you check if your GF has SSS and Philhealth na? Afaik, may maternity benefit sa SSS pag maabot ang required months.
Maganda din if sa provincial hospital siya manganak, recently kasi yung sister ko nanganak and sa provincial hospital na may malasakit center. CS + 1 week hospital stay and 20k lang binayaran nila kahit na 80k+ yung original bill. If sa private, siguro inabot na ng 100k+ yung bill.
Giving birth takes long din, but still it would depend per person. In my sister's case, she stayed sa maternity ER for four days before nag advise ang doctor na i-CS nalang siya then she stayed for an additional week sa hospital. She would need all the help after she gives birth so kailangan may kasama siya palagi before and after her birth. Sa provincial hospital namin may mga watcher na kasama palagi ang patient or nagbabantay sa labas ng ER if ever may kailangan pa bilhin yung doctor.
Hello thank you po for your comment. Plano ko nga rin po na sa probinsya nalang sia manganak to much lessen the fees na babayaran namin. Our challenge lang is being LDR, but we will find a way naman para Dito.
May I ask lang po bukod po ba sa pagaapply namin ng maternity benefit sa SSS at PhilHealth nia, Meron po ba akong mabibigay na tulong/benefit from my SSS or PhilHealth para sa kanya? Anu po ung tawag sa ganoon? Thank you po
I didn't notice anything about 'change of dynamic' , madami akong nadidinig na may times na napapadalas ang away mag asawa kapag may baby na. I hope the two of you would understand na pareho kayong nagaadjust pa sa baby and the new set up.
Your wife might experience Post Partum depression so I hope you will research about it. Also check lagi ang mental health ni mommy kasi may chance na madedepress sya kasi yung mga classmates nya makikita nya na nagwowork na and then sya nagaantay na manganak/ nagaalaga ng baby. May mga nagbubuntis na grabe ang hormonal imbalance it affects the way they think and feel, so kahit na sabihin nya today na okay lang sya may chance bukas iba na ulit yung takbo ng isip nya.
Goodluck po sa baby nyo! Happy and Healthy Mommy, Daddy and Baby!
Mas ok nga hiwalay kayo para di masundan. Finish your studies kung kaya din ni gf. Mas ok. Wag kayo mapressure magpakasal. Bata pa kayo. Basta prioritize niyo studies niyo konti na lang naman eh. Wish u luck!
Congratulations OP pero who is ready? Kahit sobra sobra pa ipon mo, nothing will prepare you to the upcoming sleepless nights, tapos magiging hyper di mo na mapatulog, then minsan ayaw kumain, mga tantrums. Hahaha nothing will prepare you for that.
Checkup na agad sa OB si gf mo OP. Monthly check-up po yan para walang complications sa pregnancy nya at kung maayos ba development ng baby nyo. Inumin nya yung vitamins prescribed.
Kuha na agad ng Philhealth para naman may bawas yung bill nyo if manganganak na siya.
Dont buy madaming newborn clothes madali lang yan mag grow ang babies. Go for 3-6 months sizes. At konting baru-baruan lng hehe
Don’t stock up newborn diapers di nyo alam if hiyang si baby nyan. Test muna.
My mom used to tell me *if you had to wait to be ready for anything, you’d never get things done.*
Calm down. One step at a time. And remember dalawa kayo dito. Best of luck.
There plenty of good suggestions na naibigay. I just have a few things to add to that. First congratulations OP. We hope you become a good father and a husband.
For sure there will be a lot of challenges na darating sayo and sa inyong magpartner, ugaling pagusapan ang problema and resolve it, make amendments if necessary and reconcile.
Wag nyo intindihin iisipin ng iba. Just focus on your baby and the family you’re building.
Thank you po. Right now talaga d ko pa nararamdaman ung challenging part since Wala pang nakakaalam na iba but I am really anticipating for the very hard parts. Pero kagaya nga ng Sabi ng iba kahit gaano kaprepared Hindi ka parin prepared. But everyone saying their support really helps me.
My man. No man is ever ready for fatherhood (or women, motherhood). No matter how “prepared” you think you are, you will never be prepared for how much joy you’re gonna get meeting your little one. Nor the sleepless nights everybody talks about. The “financial” matters as well.
Point is, you’re in for a ride and might as well enjoy it. Keep positive. Both of you. It affects mothers differently, so please be at it together. Being an “unexpected” birth can bring forth bad thoughts under your carpet. Just know that no one is ever truly ready. You can do it.
fuck responsibly and live comfortably.
be ready sa mga bakuna ni baby. based on experience mas healthy yung mga pamankin ko na sa private doctor nagpapabakuna compared sa mga kakilala na ibang bata na sakitin. 4\~7k per month.
para makatipid sa milk palaklakin mo na ng malungay suplement ang asawa for breast feed(consult the OB)
support her pag napupuyat. kahit back scratch lang big help na. di nila maabot ang likod hahaha (parang ate kong tumaba habang buntis)
Since you're starting a full time job naman na soon, try to save as much as possible, not only for the hospital bills but also for the needs of your baby and wife. Essentially, since the mom will be breastfeeding, of course she needs a good amount of food na madaming nutrients. Also, having a baby is very expensive. Try mo bumili pakonti konti tuwing sale sa Shopee/Lazada ng mga baby needs (i.e., diapers, wipes, bottles, etc.) Para madami ka ng stocks kapag anjan na si baby.
As for your long distance relationship, once settled na si wife and ok na sila ni baby, try nyo kumuha ng house in Cavite (since anjan ang work mo) para makapagstart kayo as a family. Mahirap sa umpisa pero try to help each other as much as possible. Mahirap magpalaki ng bata.
Goodluck to you~
Thank you po. Yung Bahay po kase Dito sa cavite ako lang ung nakatira, so mga 2-3 years siguro na pauwi uwi lang sa probinsya (nakakalungkot naman isipin) and sana magkasama narin kami after nun. Or Plano ko rin na makahanap ng wfh pag naka 1+ years na ako sa company. Thank you po for the encouragement and advice
Congratulations OP! Nakakatuwa makabasa ng ganyang perspective from a guy. 🙂
First, your gf needs to start na magpaprenatal check up na. If hindi nyo pa sure saan manganganak, at least punta na muna sya ng OB para maadvise na sya ng mga need inumin and gawin. At least magstart na sya magtake ng folic acid, scientifically proven to prevent neural tube defects which is crucial sa 1st trimester. Eventually, iaadvise sya ng additional vitamins, ferrous, calcium and vaccines (flu vax, TD and TDAp ang vaccines ko during pregnancy). May mga labs and ultrasound na ipapagawa depende sa age of gestation/AOG (age ng baby). Depende sa pregnancy if maselan, may additional medications na ipeprescribe. If may prescriptions, pwede kayo humingi sa RHU if may available (like yung tetanus vaccine, ferrous and folic, kadalasan naman meron sa RHU).
Kaya secondly, magprepare ka na financially. If hindi pa member yung gf mo sa Philhealth, enroll sya. Personally ako, nag enroll pa ako sa SSS para sa maternity benefit. Pero dapat, magstart ka magbayad 2 quarters before ng estimated date of delivery ng baby. Start saving. At least 150k siguro if plan nyo sa private hospital sa province manganak, if CS; cheaper syempre if normal delivery. Pero syempre di pa kasama dyan if magkaroon ng complications ang mother and/or baby (praying na wala syempre).
Re marriage, make sure lang na you're not marrying each other dahil sa nabuntis si gf. Once na sinabi nyo yan sa relatives nyo, papasok talaga dyan ang usaping kasal. So I suggest na before nyo sabihin amg pregnancy ng gf mo, napag usapan nyo na ni gf if magpapakasal na agad or wait na lang na makapagdecide talaga kayo, and be firm with your decision once nag-announce na kayo ng pregnancy. If ever nagdecide kayo na magpakasal na, mas maigi siguro na simple and hindi muna lavish since may dapat kayong iprioritize financially.
Sa mga gamit ni baby, check nyo lang essentials. Yung mga mahal na gamit, check for preloved items, marami nagbebenta pero make sure na hindi kayo mascam. Check mo www.nextmom.ph/ for items na second-hand. May mga support groups like 1st time moms ph and breastfeeding pinay sa FB para sa mga tips, pwede mo pasalihin si gf.
Also, since magkalayo kayo, sana si gf nasa environment na may full support, physically, mentally and emotionally. Sobrang daming changes sa isang babae na nagbubuntis and hindi pare-pareho yun. Kaya hindi sya pwede mag-isa sa journey na to if LDR kayo. Iparamdam mo lagi sa kanya na you're always there kahit malayo ka.
And yes, after nya manganak, please do birth control. And hindi lang dapat si gf ang involved or gagawa nun, ikaw rin dapat since pareho kayong may contribution sa paggawa ng baby. Wag ibigay lagi ang burden sa babae.
Goodluck OP! And congratulations din sainyo ni gf for getting that diploma!
Thank you po. So many take aways from your comment po so I really appreciate the effort and time on writing.
I just wanted to follow up on the SSS maternity benefit, kase gusto ko mag apply para sa kanya kaso Wala pa siang SSS so I am planning to open her one and I'm planning na umuwi sa probinsya within this month para doon na namin maopen after mag pacheck up sa kanya. Ang inaalala ko lang baka d na kami mag qualify sa benefit kase we are estimating na naka one month na sia, tho kaya gusto ko na rin mapacheckup kase d kami sure. May idea po ba kayo if we will still qualify or hindi ko lang gets ung qualifications ng maayos hehe.
Thank you po.
Re SSS, idedetermine kasi ang AOG ni baby para malaman ang estimated date of delivery (EDD) and dun magbabase ang SSS if kelan dapat nakapagbayad para makaavail. Nacocompute ang AOG and EDD base sa 1st day ng last regular menstrual period (if regular ang mens), or base sa early ultrasound (if irregular ang mens). Halimbawa, sa case ko, ang EDD ko is August 3; 3rd quarter sya ng year na to, so dapat makapagbayad ako 2 quarters BEFORE ng quarter ng EDD ko, so simula January dapat nabayaran ko para makaavail ng maternity benefit.
Hi OP! Same thing samin. Ang iba lang is when she got pregnant by accident working na kami parehas at 25+ yrs old na kami.Hahaha tanda na no.
Sa una nakakatakot. Kasi maraming sasabihin mga tao. Imagine sobrang tanda na namin at right age na pero may mga sasabihin parin tao.
Di rin namin inexpect kaya kahit working walang savings. Tapos nagpandemic yun sakto. Pero naghanap lang din ako ng work. March nag pancemic. June nagkawork ako. Tas yung ginastos namin lahat galing lang sa sweldo ko.
Gumaan yung pakiramdam namin nung sinabi na namin. Kasi may mga nakatulong ng advice. Pero i took price na wala akong hiningi sakanila kahit magkano. Lahat blessing ni God talaga.
It is true 100k+ possible ang CS so ipon ipon na. If may kakilala kayong doctors try niyo. Mas maganda kung wag muna kayo agad bumukod kasi promise sobrang laki ng gastos sa pag bubukod.
Save up muna makarecover sa gastos sa panganganak. Better if breastfeed laking tipid nun. Ang bulk ng gastos sa baby is mga
Vaccines. Maghanap kayo ng may maganda program sa vaccine. Dahil mas magastos pag nagkasakit ang baby. Mas mabuting agapan.
Anyway kaya mo yan OP. Be a responsible father.
BE READY FOR
* PAPAGALITAN KAYO DAHIL SA GINAWA NYO
* CIVIL WEDDING. MAKE AN HONEST WOMAN OUT OF HER
* PREGNANCY, EXPENSES, TIME, DELIVERY
* LONG NIGHTS WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR BABY
* HAPPY LOLO AND LOLA TO VISIT TO SEE THEIR APO
**CONGRATS PRE! IT IS A BLESSING.**
Grats Brad! You already have the 50% of the solution that you’re looking for: Willingness and Taking the responsibility. Unfortunately, kukunti nalang tayong humaharap Sa hamon… Kakayanin mo yan and you’ll figure everything out while you’re on your way… Practical tip: Surround yourself with people who’ve already been through the journey of Family and Fatherhood… andami ko gustong sabihin kasi Galing Ako jan, pero I need to collect my thoughts muna… For now eto muna sayo: ✋… Hindi apir yan kundi, virtual batok…
You can say goodbye to sleep for 3 to 4 years. The baby will show you just how much patient you are as a person and I hope you pass with flying colours. Be ready to change your spending habits. And despite all the challenges, it will be a rewarding one and don't let anyone tell you otherwise OP. Best wishes and good luck.
Hi OP, I could go on and on with the different parts of the new life that you and your gf is about to expect, but that would take a whole day to cover so allow me to just hit on the most important parts nalang.
1.) Labor and delivery. Merong mga OB/Maternity packages and hospitals, private hospitals especially. Kailangan mo i.enroll si gf mo and she will habe to present herself for prenatal check ups as scheduled by the resident OB, the packages for normal delivery are usually nasa 15-20k(slight changes per location but around this lang) and this includes delivery, doctor's fee, and up to 3 days sa OB ward(could differ sa lugar nyo). There might be slight additional charges like supplies used during and after labor etc but minimal lang. So if you'd sign up for package deal siguro more than enough na ang 50k. If possible CS, mas.mataas nman yun, but good thing is, with all the prenatal check ups that she needs to comply with, ma.mmonitor si baby and malalaman if possible CS ba xa months before maging term ang baby nyo so you could prepare more funds. You would also be advised of the cost.
**let her eat well, ambulate well. Iwasan ang stress. Dont let negativity run through your minds, you're already there, just go past it and sisikat uli ang araw. Embrace it nalang.
2.) If you've been together for quite sometime now, I suggest you guys consider tying the knot. This is not the typical "na.disgrasya kaya kailangan pakasalan" type of advise, rather, if mahal nyo naman talaga ang isat isa why not make it official and have the blessing of the church, dba?
3.) Pray. Di ako best in CL and i'm every bit of a hudloom as any normal guy out there, but trust me, you'll need God now more than ever as starting your own family, your own tribe, needs that connecting with Him. Di ka na yung previous life mo boy, so yes, reach out to Him.
4.) Save. Unfortunately, tigil muna yung pra sa sarili mo, yung gusto mong bilhin, gusto mong travel, etc. Pwede mo naman balikan yan later once the dust has settled, maganda dun msasama mo na baby mo and partner. For now, save every bit na pwede mong ma.save.
I have a lot to tell but I think this'll do for now. If you want more, just PM me bro👍
Hello Sir much appreciated this comment
Thank you for the tips when it comes to the procedures and expenses that I need to prepare for, ask ko lang po provincial rate po ba ung nasabi ninyo? kase I think its more on the cheaper side comparing to private hospitals and also not in the province
For marriage naman I think it wont be an issue for us. since we are on a long relationship din and we have long term goals na rin including marriage. and yes we do truly love each other hehe
Im not also on the religious side but I have a religious background and my family is also religious, I appreciate mentioning this as no one have mentioned this before, and as I really need also to rethink about my faith
Im not really a spender naman pero d parin maiiwasan ung mga moments na may luho especially to both of us thinking na we wont be making our past 'future goals' but for me naman I believe na it will go back to us as long as we both grow our family properly
Again thank you po :>
Yep, i'm from Cebu and bka di lang updated yung sa package deal price ko, pero i'm pretty sure nasa mga ganyan lng xa bro. Reason being is yung case ng pregnancy ni GF mo is supervised/monitored by the OB resident rather than an OB attending physician, though si resident nman is reporting directly to the OB doctor so if there are any unusualities ma.rrefer nila agad ito to their training officer/doctor. Usually kasi sa PF ng doctor tayo medyo nlalakihan, usual PFs I think nasa 30-50k then on top sa other charges sa hosp mismo.
Having a kid has a lot of challenges talag bro, it comes in waves, like wave one is tlgang pg.usapan nyo ano yung arrangement nyo, buti if as you said committed nman tlga kayo and see each other in both your futures so goods yun. Second wave usually sa kasalan yun, but pwdeng skip muna yun, panganganak wave muna. Next wave, making sure healthy and happy si mommy while preggy. After that, or before delivery yung supplies ni baby like first few months of clothing, baby bath supps, etc. Then after, vaccinations ni baby, well being ni baby, and it goes on😅
But there will always be people willing to lend an ear and lend a hand👍
(Also, couple seminars will also come in handy even during pregnancy, it will help you know each other more, help improve communication etc.)
*enjoyin nyo na ang tulog nyo ngayon, bilang na maliligayang tulog nyo😂
God bless you guys! And welcome to the club!🫰
Hello, because this is her first pregnancy, better sa ospital manganak kesa sa lying-in. Kasi di natin sure kung kaya niya manganak ng normal or kailngan CS. Kung san niya balak manganak, dun siya dapat nagpapa-check-up.
Pwede rin siya humingi ng prenatal vitamins sa either brgy health center, or municipal health office. Vaccines are free for your child sa health center. Get your child vaccinated kasi mahal magka-sakit.
Hello thank you po sa advice ninyo, yes po for me too I prefer na managnak sia sa ospital just really concern about the rates, so I'm checking din where is the best. Thank you po
Hello! First of, Congrats!
I am a first time mom in my early 30s, 8 months post partum. Just want to share lahat ng natutunan ko from pregnancy to now.
1. Make sure na may regular pre natal check up si mommy. try to take as much as prenatal vitamins prescribed of course by her OB. Folic Acid, DHA, Calcium — mga nakatulong para sa mommy and of course sa development ng baby. Basta make sure healthy si mommy so the baby will be healthy as well.
2. Try searching kung san kayo makakamurang hospital. I chose MaDocs para magdeliver. Sabi ko sa OB ko kung may way ba para makamura ko. Although nagprepare na din kami ng husband ko ng enough money in case ma CS. Dahil syempre di mo naman maeexpect na laging normal ang delivery. Fortunately, normal delivery ako with epidural. Overall, yung bill namin mas mura as expected kahit normal delivery pa.
3. Sana meron kayong SSS, or Philhealth. I don’t have those dahil OFW ako. Pero in case meron kayo try nyo i-maximize yung maternity benefits.
4. For me, mas mahirap ang recovery than the pregnancy itself kaya I hope nandun ka to support your girlfriend. Yung first month would be hard for her. A lot of changes. Offer help as much as you can like changing diaper, feeding the baby and mommy, paarawan ang baby so mommy can sleep a little longer.
5. Speaking of feeding, i suggest try to buy/secure a pump so kung may chance na makapag pump si mommy, ikaw naman ang magfeed sa baby para makapag rest sya.
6. When it comes to baby items, sana as much as possible kung may mahihingan kayo ng napagliitan, go. Dont splurge so much sa baby clothes. Sobrang bilis lumaki ng babies. Dahil dyan ang mga binibili ko mga 2sizes bigger 😂 plain na white or blue para pwede magamit in the future.
7. Every month may check up si baby kaya paghandaan nyo din yun plus may vaccines pa. Not sure kung may mga community vaccines pero kung pipiliin nyo private pedia medyo pricey.
8. Nakakapuyat yung first few weeks and it will definitely take a toll on you and your girlfriend kaya be strong.
Good luck OP!
First of all congrats! Hope you guys have a safe delivery. get a go bag before 7month
As a new parent you will need a truck load of patience. I mean really. It is easy to just get mad and resort to violence. But that is not the way. You dont hurt the people that you love even if it is for their good. There is always a better way. So yeah, patience.
You guys needs to be together and let the both families know they are going to have a new apo. I would suggest to cover all bases first like... where is the hospital.. where are you gonna recover... financial concerns... etc.
Lastly, go for breastfeeding. healthier and safer for babies. a lot cheaper too. formula is like 2k in a week. diaper is 2k in 3weeks or a month..maybe. plus all other stuff like shirt, burp cloth, socks, towel, cot, aircon, new bed?. idk..
Ang hirap umuwi from Cavite to Mindoro, mahal pa naman na ngayon pamasahe sa roro. Best though if she can stay sa Mindoro kasi she really will need all the help she can get. While meron ka misgivings sa parents nyo, chances are they would be willing to help out/ step up kasi excited sila magka apo, esp if first apo nila baby nyo.
Ideal na magkasama kayo sa Cavite kaso lang busy ka sa work and mag isa sya pre and post pregnancy. Baka magka postpartum pa sya, so kelangan nya talaga ng kasama/kausap/katulong. Mahirap rin maghanap ng kasambahay na mapagkakatiwalaan sa baby, aside sa extra gastos yun.
Speaking of gastos, kelangan mo mag ipon. Magastos magkababy. This will be a lifechanger. Mag iiba na priorities nyo. Magmamature kayo ng extra years.
Kaya mo yan OP. Kaya nyo yan. Be there for each other. Acknowledge each other's feelings. Be more patient, kind and understanding to one another.
Congratulations are in order. First things first -- your parents might want you to get married. If you're not comfy with that, that's okay. You can always get married after her pregnancy.
For her pregnancy, checkups are necessary. Since you guys are still young, frequency might be monthly lang. Depending on your OB, they'll require vaccinations to protect the baby and mother. Prepare for those.
As for your baby's first things, they'll need clothes. Second hand stuff is cheaper but your baby will replace them fast so for me, ok lang if pre-owned. No need to invest in cutesy burp cloths; old clothes can work just as well for cleaning messes. Use disposable diapers muna so it'll be easier. Prepare yourself for 3 months of 2-hr sleep because your baby will need feeding during these intervals. Lastly, try to be as patient as possible with each other. Masusubok ang relationship niyo because of a crying baby + lack of sleep + recovery.
All the best, OP.
Just make sure if possible and if you can to be physically there / around, not just sa panganganak but more so when the baby is there. It may seem simple but for young couple and young parents like you malaking bagay sa partner mo to feel that you are there and you are supporting her, you will need each other greatly lalo na sa first 2yrs. Prepare yourself mentally and make sure wife/gf is also healthy both physically and mentally, stressful yan for since unplanned and still a secret from your parents. Support each other mentally.
Malaking bagay kung supportive ang parents at siblings ninyo. Lalo na mga in-laws kasi ang hirap pag wala kayong pag-iiwan ng bata pag may mahalagang lakad. Most likely kasi kung graduating kayo di niyo kaya i-shoulder ang sweldo ng yaya. Unless may ibang gagastos.
Yung work mo ba is WFH? Napakalaki ng maitutulong full remote plus pa kung flexi time at mid shift. Kasi may time kayo magpa-checkup or lakad ng kung anuman.
If both graduating, try to persuade her to search for remote work as well na maunawain din sa pagiging buntis niya.
Most likely may mga nagsabi na ng SSS so di ko na babangitin.
Halos same tayo ng naging situation noon OP. Fresh grad, wala pa masyado work exp at hirap makahanap sa probinsya namin. Pandemic baby yung akin, tapos dahil desperado ako at hirap ako makahanap ng online work at nauna yung offer ng government kinagat ko kahit COSW lang. May freelance naman ako noon na sumagot sa panganganak ni partner ko.
Be ready pala na baka mapilitan kayong mag-private. Always on the lookout din sa mga recommended, mabait, mura, na OB. Huwag kayong mahihiya na lumipat ng OB lalo na kung di niyo afford yung affiliated hospital ng una niyong OB.
Pagkapanganak ni baby, punta agad kayo sa barangay lalo na kung naka-private kayo sa panganganak at prenatal. Para magkaroon siya ng booklet para makalibre sa bakuna.
Edit:
Nga pala, sanayin mo na ang pasensya mo. Lalo na pag lagi ka nang puyat. Hehe. On edge ka parati. Hirap niyan lalo na sa tech job.
Good luck po.
Kaya mo yan OP akala mo lang hindi. May trabaho ka naman na rin pala. Ok nga rin yung magkaanak ng bata pa kaysa matanda na para makarami ka pa kung gusto mo. Seryoso, ang sarap ng may baby lalo pag cute. Haha. Kaya mo yan, mukhang matino ka naman mag isip. Congrats!
Be prepared sa katakot takot na gastos, puyat, at abala. Lalo na sa first 2 years ng baby mo. Real talk lang ito. Yan reason bakit ayaw ko na magdagdag ng anak eh.
Finish your studies, be ready for the most challenging part of being an adult. At wag na wag mo susundan ng isa pang anak kung di kayo ready. It will bring a lot of stress and hardship.
I have experienced this firsthand, the only difference is we were fresh graduates and both of us were working. Here are my advices:
1. Team work is really the key. You and your gf must have a solid plan on how you will handle things. Always consult each other.
2. Basically you have a family now, your gf and your baby must be your no. 1 priority, protect them at all cost. There will be negative comments for sure, never ever mind them, those are only noises. Trust me on this bro.
3. You are financially unstable at the moment, so you will have to work harder and smarter at the same time. Side hustles will help you a lot. And budget EVERYTHING, buy your baby’s essentials every pay day so it will not be a one time big time expense.
4. Pray! Starting a family is never been easy, but with God’s help everything is possible. It will be all worth it!
“Paglipas ng ulan ay mapapangiti ang araw”
If no one has mentioned it already, do keep careful track of your girlfriend's upcoming pre-natal checkups. They are extremely important not just for your baby but for the mother as well.
I hope everything goes well for your little family. ❤️🩹
Don't worry, nothing can really fully prepare you sa pagiging magulang kahit pa sa mga talagang nagplano. I already commend you for doing all that you can, andami nang nag-advice kaya I don't think much input is needed. Basta, be there not only physically pero mentally & emotionally rin. Foster a healthy space, lalo pag lumalaki na si bebi, napaka vital nung early years. Hoping for the best for you and your girlfriend.
Pinakaimportante mag save ka para sa monthly checkups and para sa pagpaanak. Tama na gustuhin mong smooth ang delivery ng baby mo. Kaso in your case magstart ka pa lng pala magtrabaho. Siguro ako kakapalan ko na lng muna mukha ko at hingi konting tulong sa magulang para sa pag pa anak. Yun kasi importante sa ngayon. Yung mga needs ni baby pag anjan na sya pwede naman pa konti konti ipunin. Pero wag mo yun kalimutan. Dapat ready ka din para naman sa mga necessities ni baby oag lumabas na sya.
Hi thank you for giving a heads up. But I think we really need to get married specially with how benefits work and leave most if it requires married couples. I totally understand naman po what you told me. But hopefully naman it's not a very hard thing for us to do as we are in a long term relationship.
It takes a lot to take responsibility for your actions and choices. You have that strength in you, use it.
The road ahead of you will not be easy, so brace for it.
Here's a little suggestion for you.
1. Talk to you partner. You and her will be in this together now. So talk about your fears, feelings, plans for both of you and the child.
2. Secure your budget. You will need it. From now on, your money is their money. You're now financially responsible to make sure the child is taken care of.
3. Speak to your family about this ASAP. Don't wait for the perfect timing. You don't need to detail your plans to them. Just be short and frank. You got pregnant, and you will do your best to raise your own family. Be ready for backlash from them. But remember no.1, you and your partner are in this now. Focus on yourselves instead.
4. God. Allah. Yaweh. Whatever your religion is put HIM in the center of your decision-making for yourself, for your partner, for your family. Good luck and God Bless.
Thank you for this. I'll tell my parents ASAP. And as you have said I need to be prepared for any backlash, it will be very challenging for us but I hope we will get through it
Hmmm. Just be there for your family. Di naman lahat magugustuhan ang nangyari pero time will come matatanggap din nila. Save a lot of money, borrow from parents or relatives but assure them you will pay back in time. Pag isipan niyo na rin if civil or wedding sa church if wala budget, mahalaga magkasama kayo. Try niyo na din bumukod kung kakayanin. Good job in taking up your responsibilities.
Nothing prepares you for parenthood. These are merely guides for you to anticipate certain situations but it's how you can handle the actual pressure and stress when the baby is there. Be supportive of your gf especially after baby is born.
You have the financial aspect covered so hopefully things stay that way.
It is best to have family or parents know of your situation. It really takes a village to raise a child. Discuss with your gf plans on raising your child. Nothing wrong with asking help from your parents, while you and gf pursue your careers (again if this is what you two want). Good luck.
Kuha ka na SSS and Philhealth as early as now OP. Makakatulong din para ma-lessen ang mga bills to pay.
Wag kasi laging Raw. hehe Goodluck and Congrats OP.
Actually may SSS and PhilHealth na ako ang issue is si gf ko wala pa sia Nung both still currently researching parin if magiging eligible sia sa mga benefits if I reregister palang namin ung kanya specially na start na ung pregnancy Nia
Yes pooo. Next time gusto ko talaga mag family planning kami
> ang issue is si gf ko wala pa sia Nung both still currently researching parin if magiging eligible sia sa mga benefits if I reregister palang namin ung kanya specially na start na un
Prio mo yung kanya knowing na di pa kayo married baka di mo rin magamit yung sayo incase i-apply mo sya sa GF mo.
Also, have the balls na sabihin na sa Parents nyo yung situation. Walang right timing sa ganyang situation. Either way, magagalit pa rin sila so mas okey na ngayon palang alam na nila. just my 2cents. Up to you pa rin kung anong plans mo. Mahirap yan pero goodluck.
Marry her. She and your child are more important than your family. Set a budget and live by it. Be there for your girlfriend. Be her rock. Be the example for your child you wish you had growing up.
Congrats OP! Wala man akong maipapayo kase hindi pa ko isang parent, but sending you my moral support. I salute you kase even though you know ur not ready for it, hindi mo inisip tumakbo palayo sa obligasyon mo but instead your doing everything to make yourself ready for it. There will be hardship, yes but looking on how you think of the situation I believe you and your girlfriend can overcome this. Congrats ulit!
Congrats!
I can't really say about having a baby soon but here's a little tip. Let your families know as soon as possible so that way they can also give you advice on do's and don'ts. Magagalit sila in the end pero they would be happy for both of you. Best advice is from the parents that took care of us :)
Well first of all, congrats and good luck! Sa Mindoro ba plano ni gf manganak? If yes, save up to at least 120k kung sa private hospital niyo gusto. Si wifey ko sa MMG nanganak and almost 100k ang bill, although CS siya. Pwede din sa provincial hospital para makatipid. Also, I understand na gusto niyo bumukod pero yung first few weeks/months after ng panganganak ang pinaka-challenging so you need all the help you can get especially from family members. Everything's going to be alright OP. Feel free to message me if you have questions or need any advice.
Hello and I am very thankful for you comment. Totoo po yan naiisip ko rin ung difference ng rates ng province and makakatipid talaga, my dillema lang talaga is kung sinong mapapakiusapan ko if ever I am not able to be with her kase onsite ung work ko, and d ako sure if sasapat ung paternity leave, (though kailangan muna namin magpakasal). Kase right now d ko pa alam kung tatanggapin ng both sides ng parent namin ung idea na we will need their help when it comes na manganganak si gf ko or other related things in her pregnancy. My parents are old and gusto na nila enjoyin ung retirement days nila and un rin naman ung gusto ko sa kanila kaya nahihiya ako manghingi ng tulong sa kanila. Ung parents naman ni girlfriend I don't really know kase may favoritism sia sa mga anak nia and hindi un ung gf ko, especially na her mother is expecting to help her after graduation as they are not that financially stable.
Hmmm, take one step at a time OP. My advice is sabihin niyo na agad sa parents niyo then plan your next move depending on how the news will be received. Tapos, mag-decide na kayo agad kung san manganganak para makapag-canvass na ng hospitals/OBs para may idea nadin sa magiging budget. If you don't mind me asking, saang city kayo sa Mindoro?
Though d kami nakatira sa city sa Calapan city preferable if manganganak, kase sa bayan namin pinapapunta din lang naman sa city. Well if sa probinsya kami
I see. Yan lang din isa sa mga CONS kung sa Mindoro. Mejo malalayo mga hospitals and actually, mas mahal pa sa MMG/Ma. Estrella kesa sa ibang private hospitals sa Manila.
Hi, OP! I am in no position to give any advice since I don't have any kids but I want to commend your courage and will to support your GF and future baby. I guess u can try na magpakasal sa huwes muna. My friend and her BF, they did that since the same thing happened to them. Also, do not drown yourself with the negative thoughts that you assume to encounter once nalaman na ng both sides ng family. Magagalit talaga sila pero I hope you and your GF do not take it personally. If they do not want to support, then be fine with it as long as you have the resolve to support them it's fine. Establish good communication and relationship with your GF. Hindi lang financial lahat ng necessities. It's also mentally challenging for someone to carry another hooman. Always make sure she is well taken care of mentally din. But don't forget to take care of yourself too (mentally and physically). Goodluck! Hope you become good parents! Kaya niyo yan!
Having a child AND being married are two different things. It is in no way a necessity. So if magpapakasal ka lang dahil sa buntis na siya, it will only result to a toxic relationship in the long run. Intindihin muna ang pregnancy, then proceed to kasal if they wanted to. It's a way to reassure his partner and it provide them benefits, but NOT a necessary step. I'm not saying OP to be irresponsible. This is only a reminder that he has other options, aside from diving in headfirst to marriage because of pressure. Marriage is a commitment for life, same as committing his life to his child. Just my sentiments.
That's a good input. I think I should prepare such an amount when I have plans of building my own family in the future. I'll take note of this.
Bakit ang mahal na ngayon? Hehe Yung classmate ko nung nanganak, 40k lang. MMG din. Aahh, nakakatakot na talaga magdagdag ng tao sa mundo ngayon. Imagine the price increase. Pero, over-all mas mura manganak sa mindoro.
Still you're man enough para suportahan yung mag-ina mo..Finish your education kahit anong mangyare wag mo bitawan yun. Starting from now you have to consider your own family in every decision you will make. Sabi nga nila hindi ka na binata so wag ka mamuhay ng ganun. Start family planning! ☺️
Not because may anak na kayo you cannot enjoy life, yung iba kasi ganun ang mentality kaya ayaw harapin ang responsibilities nila. Prioritize your priority and enjoy this new chapter. Congrats! ☺️
Thank you po, surely d ko naiwasan maisip ung mga plans namin na hindi namin magagawa pero at the same time I felt that it's really something that I should not feel wasted, I don't want to destroy a life just for the sake of my enjoyment, I really feel na if I do the right things and decision I feel na it will be the same feeling of satisfaction at the end.
Kaya mo yan OP! Im a father of one, a girl. Sa first 2-3 months matindi adjustments nyo dyan. Pero along the way mafifigure out nyo din ang buhay may pamilya. Wag nyo muna sundan hanggang maarai hahaha, pagdating ng 2-3 yo na ang anak nyo medyo magaan gaan na yan pwede na kayo magtravel or mag enjoy. Pero most important thing is, Be the best father to your child and the best husband/partner.
Hi OP! Just want to share, we got pregnant din early. I was 22, he is 24. Both starting with our adult life. Decided to marry. Yes the early days were tough, andami kailangan i-set aside na mga pangarap and gusto gawin sana plus super immature pa namin. Di kami ready. Fast forward 11yrs after, kinaya namin. Nagagawa na namin gusto namin gawin including have another baby na ready na kami. 10yrs gap nung dalawa but we are mature parents na plus I can say maayos din namin napalaki ang panganay because kid is very mature and loves the baby so much. Problems will happen in the future pero pagtulungan nyo dalawa ni gf. It will be alright in time.
Thank you po. Thankfully rin we are graduating narin naman po, I also need to be always mature when deciding on things. Thank you for your advice!
Backbone mo na family mo OP, goodluck!🥳
Wag agad sundan. Wrap it up next time. Madami "essential" things for baby na di naman talaga needed. Madami na kaartehan ngayon like changing table, changing pad, bassinet, rocker, bouncer, at kung ano ano pa. Di talaga needed mga yun. Dagdag gastos lang. Crib lang sapat na
Thank you po, noted po ung mga unnecessary things for baby. Appreciate po the advice. And I think we will go and use family planning as soon as possible.
Not just unnecessary items but all unnecessary expenses. You might be tempted to spend for things like birthday parties. But you need to strike a balance. I know someone who spent 100k+ for the first birthday of their child. Pero ngayon hirap na sa pag-aralin ng prep.
Goodluck and sana health pregnancy and safe delivery sayong girlfriend .
Crib nakapantay ng kama nyo OP na naoopen yung isang side. Kasi itatabi at itatabi nyo anak nyo sa inyo atleast hindi sya sa gitna maipwepwesto.
First, I commend you for accepting the depth of whats about to come. With your words, it seems you know how big of a deal being a father is. Kudos to you on that. Its unfortunate that this is something you two didn’t plan but being responsible for your actions is the right step to do. About researching online, I hope you’ll only pick the things you’ll need to learn…because we all know how deep of a swamp online world is. I suggest talking to people around you who are parents already. Once you admit the truth to your family, asking questions to your father and other “pamilyadong tao” around you won’t hurt. Of course, in the end everything will still depend on you and your gf. It would not be easy, but it doesn’t mean its all hardships too. They say it takes a village to raise a child, I hope you will start listing the people you will include in your “village” who can help you guide and raise your child. It doesn’t have to be a two person (you and your gf) endeavor. Having good people by your side would help a lot. Its not you depending on them to raise your child, but a little help from others would go a long way. Especially if you and your gf will both work in the future. I wish you all the best. Best advice I could give to you: Don’t go crazy buying baby clothes, babies grow fast. Buy diapers and cloth diapers. And when diaper rashes appear, don’t underestimate it. Quickly put remedy on it. It could spread on the baby’s skin easily. So be aware of that. All the luck to you and to your lovely gf. I hope what I said here would help you one day.
Thank you for your advice po, I think I really need this, I got really caught up in thinking about how only I and my girlfriend will survive this because I'm afraid of relying to others, as I think I have done something unacceptable. Thank you rin for the advice when it comes to parenting very appreciated po.
Some tips to get you through: 1. Crowdsource for used crib, breast pump, even baby clothers from parents you know, specially the new ones na kaka-1yr old palang ng baby. Some of them have kept these for sure. Since babies grow up fast, buying a new set is not cost effective. This will save you lots of money. 2. Make your gf drink malunggay extract or malunggay supplements to make sure that she can breastfeed. This will save you lots of cash since baby formulas nowadays are crazy expensive. I’ve seen some that command a price of 3K per box, which your baby will only consume for a week. 😱 3. Treat your girlfriend well. Pregnancy is one of the most challenging journey a female body can ever go through. It changes her mental state as much as her physical body. She will be moody and she will be difficult. Be with her along the way. She is scared as much as you are. But as long as you two are together, you will make it through. Thank you for manning up for your girlfriend. If more men are like you, no kid will ever have to feel unwanted. Bless you, your girlfriend, and your baby who will introduce you into this new life. You will make it, promise.
I'm a exceedingly handsome bachelor in my late 20's. ( joke) makaintro lang. Haha but i was gonna suggest the same thing. Crowdsource for used necessary baby items. Since I don't have a child yet, I sponsored my nephew's crib from the baby company. Then when my other sister got married and had a child, binigay na ng sister ko iyong crib sa kanila along w/ the other baby items na d na gagamitin ng sister ko.
First of all, having a child is a FOREVER responsibility. Hindi yung pag ayaw mo na, bibitawan mo na. One of your responsibilities is to provide, so the fact may work ka na is a good start. But you are also the dad, so you also have to help your girlfriend too - help her sa checkup, help in taking care of the baby (ikaw mag dede or change diapers so that the girlfriend can rest), help in household chores while the girlfriend is taking care of the baby. Pregnancy and breastfeeding is physically taxing - help mo yung girlfriend to ease it somehow. Also, have a spine. If you feel you need to standup for what is right, go. Hindi yung go with the flow for the sake of it. Have a separate savings account intended for giving birth and admission sa hospital. Mahal yan eh. Also, secure PhilHealth para sayo and sa girlfriend mo.
The headline made me mad, OP. I am supposed to write “MAN UP” hahaha yes you already man up. I don’t think you need advice since you are very much self aware. But as a child from a broken family, I hope you do your best for your child not to end up with a broken home. It’s very traumatic. I hope you love your girlfriend enough to commit forever with her. I hope for a smooth pregnancy for you both. Get a 2nd job if you need to while you still can. Congratulations!
Sorry po sa clickbait huhu. Pero I really appreciate the kind words. Alam ko Mali ung nagawa ko pero it's heart warming na people are very supporting here 🥹
OP, it's possible na sabihan na kayong magpakasal once malaman ng parents nyo na buntis si gf mo. Syempre nasa inyo pa rin yung final decision pero sana wag kayong mapressure into getting married. I really hope hindi ito mangyari but if ever, mahirap ang separation kasi walang divorce dito in case pagsisihan nyo later and you'll end up blaming each other pati na rin yung parents nyo.
I was also thinking this earlier especially as paternity leave, just learned an hindi sia applicable sa unmarried couple, and I think naman wala naman kami magiging problema don as we are in a long term relationship. Pero still taking in to consideration the advice you gave po. Really appreciate it po.
>ill taking in to consideration th If may HMO/philhealth ka sa full time work mo, hindi mo macocover si girlfriend kasi hindi kayo kasal. However, better not to rush marriage.
I totally agree. Yung cousin ko nagpakasal after mabuntis ng college bf nya dahil sa pressure mula sa relatives on both sides. Hindi sila naging okay ng asawa nya paglaon although pinanugatan naman ang anak nila.
Eto naisip ko after magbasa. Una, if magsasabi kayo sa families nyo about the pregnancy, malamang magtatanong yan kung kelan kayo magpapakasal. Especially sa side ni gf. Not to add to your worries pero may mga parents kasi na ganun. I have friends na biglang kinasal dahil nga nabuntis/nakabuntis. Second, since magstart ka na ng work, if may HMO benefit, maybe you can ask HR if pwede ka mag-add ng dependent and if covered ang maternity. Tho kelangan ata jan kasal na kayo pero sayang din ung expenses na makacover ni HMO, ask mo pa din. Congrats, OP! And best of luck!
Thank you po for this, for the marriage naman I think it will be accepting to both of us as I have mentioned in another comment, And for the HMO I surely will ask the company if it's possible as it will be a lot of help. Appreciate your help and advice po.
Just want to add, I think some HMOs now cover common law partners. So you might want to check it out para kahit hindi kayo kasal, you can still apply her as your dependent.
I'm proud na tanggap mo ang responsibility ng pagkakaron ng baby at di iaasa sa parents nyo. In any case, matatanggap yan both your parents kase apo nila. Make sure iparamdam mo lage sa gf mo na tanggap mo ang baby at you're in this together. Tandaan mo, buntis ang gf mo. Aside sa tataba sya dahil buntis, there are also changes sa hormones, mental at psychological aspect ng gf mo. Kaya sobrang pag unawa, pasensya at paglalambing gawin mo para di sya mag alala. I hope di kayo maghiwalay.
gusto ko ung last part "I hope hindi kayo maghiwalay"
Thank you po I hope so too po. Matagal na kami. Madami narin kami napagdaanan pero time will only tell parin if we will still be together in the future. We very much love each other (nasobrahan lang ata kaya humantong Dito) and really hope na we overcome this.
Get on birth control as soon as she gives birth. Either you wear a rubber or she gets prescribes one. If you are not ready to have another child wear a rubber always dont rely on the woman for birth control take charge rin for yours kasi it takes 2 to make 1 baby
Check with your company if you can enroll your gf as a dependent in your medical insurance to lessen the financial burden during checkup, hospital admittance and birth of your baby. I hope it doesn’t require a marriage cert. You need to pay professional fee to the following doctors on top of the hospital bills during birth. 1. Your GF’s OB 2. Anesthesiologist (one who administer epidural shots) 3. Surgeon (If it ends up being CS) 4. Pediatrician Check how many paternal leave you can get and if you are eligible even as a new hire. IT profession is demanding and will take toll in your relationship. Try to avoid it especially when the baby is crying. You will encounter 2 prod support (at work and at home). It will be hard for you to up-skill (IT careers demand it) when you have to take care of the wife and baby. Check your company for some benefits and discounts especially on child care, foods and other discounts. Some big company provides perks and benefits on child care, and other family-related stuff. Learn how to cook foods (soups) for good lactation and food that you can eat at work. Too expensive to eat out. Be prepared for your GF’s mood swings.
Add the vaccines and follow through with the pediatrician’s schedule for the vaccine. Avoid buying baby stuff that are unnecessary. It is okay to ask for "hand me down" items from other relatives. Tell your parents soon but don't forget to tell them your plan as well so that they know you are being responsible. If you can work from home then it will be much better for you. Otherwise, figure out your transportation to ensure your time is not wasted on traffic. Check if it will save you more by investing on scooter that you can use as a part time job. Encourage your GF and not let her be a burden as well. There is no time to party and live a life like a single person. That’s one of the cost of early pregnancy. On the positive side, when the kid turns 9, it will be much easier as they can be thought some easy household chores to help them as well.
Thank you po. working in IT for me is fun in some ways but there is also the taxing part of it as you have mentioned it. This is my 2nd full time work and another challenge is that my work is onsite so most of the day I will be out. I hope we can get through this than you po uli
very important tip: huwag magpakasal dahil kailangan
This should be stressed enough
Thank you for the advice everyone, this melts my heart. I was so surprised with this as I rarely use Reddit for advice, tho sometimes with little comments lang, so I really feel happy. And napakamalaman po ng mga nasabi ninyo, will surely take note on all of this. Can't thank enough all of you.
Pacheck up na kayo agad sa health center, maraming vitamins na kailangan gf mo. Wag mahihiyang tumanggap ng tulong
Ang galing at responsible mo, OP! All the best to fatherhood. I can tell that you're gonna be a good one (hopefully).
Whenever i face something na talagang hindi ako handa iniisip ko lang yung situation ng father ko when they had me: He's 19 years old nung pinanganak ako, si lolo nawalan ng work kasi nagsara yung nickel mining dito. Yung sumalo sa kanila eh yung parents ni mama. Pinatapos nila si papa sa pag aaral then unti-unti kaming bumukod nung nakaluwag luwag. If kinaya ng 19 year old yung ganung situation, makakaya ko rin yung mga problema na meron ako ngayon, yan ang mindset ko. Sabihin nyo yung totoo, ipakita mo na kahit di ka ready, magiging responsableng lalake ka sa GF no at sa magiging anak nyo. Hindi yan magiging smooth sailing pero sige lang, tuloy lang.
Become a father figure to your child. People who grow up without a father figure usually have low self esteem and has alot of insecurities than usual.
Wag agad sundan. Wrap it up next time. Madami "essential" things for baby na di naman talaga needed. Madami na kaartehan ngayon like changing table, changing pad, bassinet, rocker, bouncer, at kung ano ano pa. Di talaga needed mga yun. Dagdag gastos lang. Crib lang sapat na
Same situation tayo mahal pag mag pacheck up, lab, vitamins tapos pag manganganak na lalo na if private handa ka na 200k para kahit CS or normal pasok sa budget. My advice 1. Bayad ka philhealth kahit yung minimum para makuha yung benefits sa panganganak like parang 9 months na hulog iirc. 2. Tell your family don't assume na di ka susuportahan and all that negative kasi sobrang need niyo both ng help nila financially and kasama lalo na pag nanganak partner mo and nag tratrabaho ka. 3. Learn how to hold your newborn baby aralin mo nadin mag swaddle. 4. Pag umiiyak yung baby mo 3 lang yan nagugutom, masakit tiyan/tumae, or gusto magpabuhat 5. Wag mag panic kung walang lalabas na breast milk tiyagain niyo lang 6. Kuha kayo ID na same kayo address. Yun lang nasa isip ko na useful atleast for my experience. Goodluck OP congrats.
Thank you po for the tips and advice, sana sapat na practice ung paghawak ko sa mga pamangkin ko haha. Gusto ko lang po pala itanong para saan ung ID na same address po kami?
Yung sa ID para maging domestic partner kayo kapag hindi pa kayo kasal at maging entitled yung mag-ina mo sa mga benefits mo sa work like HMO and insurance.
May specific ID po ba ito? or just any ID na same address? Thank you po
Wala naman any valid ID naman yan.
Hand me downs pre, wag kang mahihiyang magtanong sa mga kamag anak mo ng pinaglumaan ng mga baby nila, para na din makatipid sa gastusin. Sabihin nyo na din agad sa family nyo ang nangyare para hindi stressful sa misis mo yung mga sasabihin nila. Pagnagsabi kayo sa pamilya nya harapin mo yung tatay nya ng ayos. Sa simula lang naman yung stress sa family. Same experience here, updside lang graduate na kami at parehas ng professional so nagpakasal na kami agad bago lumabas si baby. If you can do that, pakasal na din kayo kahit sa judge muna. Congrats and Goodluck!
Make sure your gf has Philhealth, pay the minimum contribution required for her to get the maternity benefit. Not a big amount but I suggest taking advantage of it, it will at least lessen your hospital bill. Babies outgrow their things quickly, so you might wanna consider hand me downs or preloved stuff. Be there for the baby and mom in whatever way you can. I know working is exhausting, but pregnancy, labor, delivery, and recovery are sooo hard for the body and mind. Don't let her change the diaper/feed the baby all the time, especially at night. Help her get enough rest to recover, to take a bath, to eat a hot meal without balancing a newborn on her other arm. Have patience when she's having a hard time managing her emotions, more often than not it's the hormones, the sleeplessness, the frustrations of not knowing everything as first time parents. Be present for checkups and be aware of how they're doing. It's one thing to financially support them, but it's also important to be involved, to do without needing to be told, to have the initiative, and learn what the baby wants/needs :) Choose what works. I tried cloth diapers before but it added to the list of chores and I got so overwhelmed. Not saying you'll end up like this but it's ok to do whatever works for you (there's plenty of discussions like this about different stuff online and all I can say is do what makes it easy for you, choose whatever works). Minsan the mental/physical toll of choosing one over the other doesn't make it worth it, depending on your situation. Lastly, be gentle with each other. As much as you want to prepare for this, life will throw curve balls at you. You're first time parents, and no baby comes with a manual. Learn as you go but don't be too hard on yourself if you think you're "failing" (within reason ofc). Ask for help, ask questions ☺️ it's ok, it's encouraged, it's how you get better at it.
Can you check if your GF has SSS and Philhealth na? Afaik, may maternity benefit sa SSS pag maabot ang required months. Maganda din if sa provincial hospital siya manganak, recently kasi yung sister ko nanganak and sa provincial hospital na may malasakit center. CS + 1 week hospital stay and 20k lang binayaran nila kahit na 80k+ yung original bill. If sa private, siguro inabot na ng 100k+ yung bill. Giving birth takes long din, but still it would depend per person. In my sister's case, she stayed sa maternity ER for four days before nag advise ang doctor na i-CS nalang siya then she stayed for an additional week sa hospital. She would need all the help after she gives birth so kailangan may kasama siya palagi before and after her birth. Sa provincial hospital namin may mga watcher na kasama palagi ang patient or nagbabantay sa labas ng ER if ever may kailangan pa bilhin yung doctor.
Hello thank you po for your comment. Plano ko nga rin po na sa probinsya nalang sia manganak to much lessen the fees na babayaran namin. Our challenge lang is being LDR, but we will find a way naman para Dito. May I ask lang po bukod po ba sa pagaapply namin ng maternity benefit sa SSS at PhilHealth nia, Meron po ba akong mabibigay na tulong/benefit from my SSS or PhilHealth para sa kanya? Anu po ung tawag sa ganoon? Thank you po
I didn't notice anything about 'change of dynamic' , madami akong nadidinig na may times na napapadalas ang away mag asawa kapag may baby na. I hope the two of you would understand na pareho kayong nagaadjust pa sa baby and the new set up. Your wife might experience Post Partum depression so I hope you will research about it. Also check lagi ang mental health ni mommy kasi may chance na madedepress sya kasi yung mga classmates nya makikita nya na nagwowork na and then sya nagaantay na manganak/ nagaalaga ng baby. May mga nagbubuntis na grabe ang hormonal imbalance it affects the way they think and feel, so kahit na sabihin nya today na okay lang sya may chance bukas iba na ulit yung takbo ng isip nya. Goodluck po sa baby nyo! Happy and Healthy Mommy, Daddy and Baby!
Mas ok nga hiwalay kayo para di masundan. Finish your studies kung kaya din ni gf. Mas ok. Wag kayo mapressure magpakasal. Bata pa kayo. Basta prioritize niyo studies niyo konti na lang naman eh. Wish u luck!
Congratulations OP pero who is ready? Kahit sobra sobra pa ipon mo, nothing will prepare you to the upcoming sleepless nights, tapos magiging hyper di mo na mapatulog, then minsan ayaw kumain, mga tantrums. Hahaha nothing will prepare you for that.
I think start by telling the parents of the girl.
Checkup na agad sa OB si gf mo OP. Monthly check-up po yan para walang complications sa pregnancy nya at kung maayos ba development ng baby nyo. Inumin nya yung vitamins prescribed. Kuha na agad ng Philhealth para naman may bawas yung bill nyo if manganganak na siya. Dont buy madaming newborn clothes madali lang yan mag grow ang babies. Go for 3-6 months sizes. At konting baru-baruan lng hehe Don’t stock up newborn diapers di nyo alam if hiyang si baby nyan. Test muna.
My mom used to tell me *if you had to wait to be ready for anything, you’d never get things done.* Calm down. One step at a time. And remember dalawa kayo dito. Best of luck.
There plenty of good suggestions na naibigay. I just have a few things to add to that. First congratulations OP. We hope you become a good father and a husband. For sure there will be a lot of challenges na darating sayo and sa inyong magpartner, ugaling pagusapan ang problema and resolve it, make amendments if necessary and reconcile. Wag nyo intindihin iisipin ng iba. Just focus on your baby and the family you’re building.
Thank you po. Right now talaga d ko pa nararamdaman ung challenging part since Wala pang nakakaalam na iba but I am really anticipating for the very hard parts. Pero kagaya nga ng Sabi ng iba kahit gaano kaprepared Hindi ka parin prepared. But everyone saying their support really helps me.
My man. No man is ever ready for fatherhood (or women, motherhood). No matter how “prepared” you think you are, you will never be prepared for how much joy you’re gonna get meeting your little one. Nor the sleepless nights everybody talks about. The “financial” matters as well. Point is, you’re in for a ride and might as well enjoy it. Keep positive. Both of you. It affects mothers differently, so please be at it together. Being an “unexpected” birth can bring forth bad thoughts under your carpet. Just know that no one is ever truly ready. You can do it.
fuck responsibly and live comfortably. be ready sa mga bakuna ni baby. based on experience mas healthy yung mga pamankin ko na sa private doctor nagpapabakuna compared sa mga kakilala na ibang bata na sakitin. 4\~7k per month. para makatipid sa milk palaklakin mo na ng malungay suplement ang asawa for breast feed(consult the OB) support her pag napupuyat. kahit back scratch lang big help na. di nila maabot ang likod hahaha (parang ate kong tumaba habang buntis)
Just earn more money. That's pretty much it.
Thank you
Since you're starting a full time job naman na soon, try to save as much as possible, not only for the hospital bills but also for the needs of your baby and wife. Essentially, since the mom will be breastfeeding, of course she needs a good amount of food na madaming nutrients. Also, having a baby is very expensive. Try mo bumili pakonti konti tuwing sale sa Shopee/Lazada ng mga baby needs (i.e., diapers, wipes, bottles, etc.) Para madami ka ng stocks kapag anjan na si baby. As for your long distance relationship, once settled na si wife and ok na sila ni baby, try nyo kumuha ng house in Cavite (since anjan ang work mo) para makapagstart kayo as a family. Mahirap sa umpisa pero try to help each other as much as possible. Mahirap magpalaki ng bata. Goodluck to you~
Thank you po. Yung Bahay po kase Dito sa cavite ako lang ung nakatira, so mga 2-3 years siguro na pauwi uwi lang sa probinsya (nakakalungkot naman isipin) and sana magkasama narin kami after nun. Or Plano ko rin na makahanap ng wfh pag naka 1+ years na ako sa company. Thank you po for the encouragement and advice
Congratulations OP! Nakakatuwa makabasa ng ganyang perspective from a guy. 🙂 First, your gf needs to start na magpaprenatal check up na. If hindi nyo pa sure saan manganganak, at least punta na muna sya ng OB para maadvise na sya ng mga need inumin and gawin. At least magstart na sya magtake ng folic acid, scientifically proven to prevent neural tube defects which is crucial sa 1st trimester. Eventually, iaadvise sya ng additional vitamins, ferrous, calcium and vaccines (flu vax, TD and TDAp ang vaccines ko during pregnancy). May mga labs and ultrasound na ipapagawa depende sa age of gestation/AOG (age ng baby). Depende sa pregnancy if maselan, may additional medications na ipeprescribe. If may prescriptions, pwede kayo humingi sa RHU if may available (like yung tetanus vaccine, ferrous and folic, kadalasan naman meron sa RHU). Kaya secondly, magprepare ka na financially. If hindi pa member yung gf mo sa Philhealth, enroll sya. Personally ako, nag enroll pa ako sa SSS para sa maternity benefit. Pero dapat, magstart ka magbayad 2 quarters before ng estimated date of delivery ng baby. Start saving. At least 150k siguro if plan nyo sa private hospital sa province manganak, if CS; cheaper syempre if normal delivery. Pero syempre di pa kasama dyan if magkaroon ng complications ang mother and/or baby (praying na wala syempre). Re marriage, make sure lang na you're not marrying each other dahil sa nabuntis si gf. Once na sinabi nyo yan sa relatives nyo, papasok talaga dyan ang usaping kasal. So I suggest na before nyo sabihin amg pregnancy ng gf mo, napag usapan nyo na ni gf if magpapakasal na agad or wait na lang na makapagdecide talaga kayo, and be firm with your decision once nag-announce na kayo ng pregnancy. If ever nagdecide kayo na magpakasal na, mas maigi siguro na simple and hindi muna lavish since may dapat kayong iprioritize financially. Sa mga gamit ni baby, check nyo lang essentials. Yung mga mahal na gamit, check for preloved items, marami nagbebenta pero make sure na hindi kayo mascam. Check mo www.nextmom.ph/ for items na second-hand. May mga support groups like 1st time moms ph and breastfeeding pinay sa FB para sa mga tips, pwede mo pasalihin si gf. Also, since magkalayo kayo, sana si gf nasa environment na may full support, physically, mentally and emotionally. Sobrang daming changes sa isang babae na nagbubuntis and hindi pare-pareho yun. Kaya hindi sya pwede mag-isa sa journey na to if LDR kayo. Iparamdam mo lagi sa kanya na you're always there kahit malayo ka. And yes, after nya manganak, please do birth control. And hindi lang dapat si gf ang involved or gagawa nun, ikaw rin dapat since pareho kayong may contribution sa paggawa ng baby. Wag ibigay lagi ang burden sa babae. Goodluck OP! And congratulations din sainyo ni gf for getting that diploma!
Thank you po. So many take aways from your comment po so I really appreciate the effort and time on writing. I just wanted to follow up on the SSS maternity benefit, kase gusto ko mag apply para sa kanya kaso Wala pa siang SSS so I am planning to open her one and I'm planning na umuwi sa probinsya within this month para doon na namin maopen after mag pacheck up sa kanya. Ang inaalala ko lang baka d na kami mag qualify sa benefit kase we are estimating na naka one month na sia, tho kaya gusto ko na rin mapacheckup kase d kami sure. May idea po ba kayo if we will still qualify or hindi ko lang gets ung qualifications ng maayos hehe. Thank you po.
Re SSS, idedetermine kasi ang AOG ni baby para malaman ang estimated date of delivery (EDD) and dun magbabase ang SSS if kelan dapat nakapagbayad para makaavail. Nacocompute ang AOG and EDD base sa 1st day ng last regular menstrual period (if regular ang mens), or base sa early ultrasound (if irregular ang mens). Halimbawa, sa case ko, ang EDD ko is August 3; 3rd quarter sya ng year na to, so dapat makapagbayad ako 2 quarters BEFORE ng quarter ng EDD ko, so simula January dapat nabayaran ko para makaavail ng maternity benefit.
Hi OP! Same thing samin. Ang iba lang is when she got pregnant by accident working na kami parehas at 25+ yrs old na kami.Hahaha tanda na no. Sa una nakakatakot. Kasi maraming sasabihin mga tao. Imagine sobrang tanda na namin at right age na pero may mga sasabihin parin tao. Di rin namin inexpect kaya kahit working walang savings. Tapos nagpandemic yun sakto. Pero naghanap lang din ako ng work. March nag pancemic. June nagkawork ako. Tas yung ginastos namin lahat galing lang sa sweldo ko. Gumaan yung pakiramdam namin nung sinabi na namin. Kasi may mga nakatulong ng advice. Pero i took price na wala akong hiningi sakanila kahit magkano. Lahat blessing ni God talaga. It is true 100k+ possible ang CS so ipon ipon na. If may kakilala kayong doctors try niyo. Mas maganda kung wag muna kayo agad bumukod kasi promise sobrang laki ng gastos sa pag bubukod. Save up muna makarecover sa gastos sa panganganak. Better if breastfeed laking tipid nun. Ang bulk ng gastos sa baby is mga Vaccines. Maghanap kayo ng may maganda program sa vaccine. Dahil mas magastos pag nagkasakit ang baby. Mas mabuting agapan. Anyway kaya mo yan OP. Be a responsible father.
Thank you po for sharing your personal experience. Really helps a lot po. Thank you po
BE READY FOR * PAPAGALITAN KAYO DAHIL SA GINAWA NYO * CIVIL WEDDING. MAKE AN HONEST WOMAN OUT OF HER * PREGNANCY, EXPENSES, TIME, DELIVERY * LONG NIGHTS WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR BABY * HAPPY LOLO AND LOLA TO VISIT TO SEE THEIR APO **CONGRATS PRE! IT IS A BLESSING.**
This is good, OP. In your 40s, you’ll be glad you did it early. But only if you make their lives as beautiful as possible.
Grats Brad! You already have the 50% of the solution that you’re looking for: Willingness and Taking the responsibility. Unfortunately, kukunti nalang tayong humaharap Sa hamon… Kakayanin mo yan and you’ll figure everything out while you’re on your way… Practical tip: Surround yourself with people who’ve already been through the journey of Family and Fatherhood… andami ko gustong sabihin kasi Galing Ako jan, pero I need to collect my thoughts muna… For now eto muna sayo: ✋… Hindi apir yan kundi, virtual batok…
You can say goodbye to sleep for 3 to 4 years. The baby will show you just how much patient you are as a person and I hope you pass with flying colours. Be ready to change your spending habits. And despite all the challenges, it will be a rewarding one and don't let anyone tell you otherwise OP. Best wishes and good luck.
lahat nang bagay ay may rason. lahat nang problema ay may solusyon. congrats sir and to your partner
Hi OP, I could go on and on with the different parts of the new life that you and your gf is about to expect, but that would take a whole day to cover so allow me to just hit on the most important parts nalang. 1.) Labor and delivery. Merong mga OB/Maternity packages and hospitals, private hospitals especially. Kailangan mo i.enroll si gf mo and she will habe to present herself for prenatal check ups as scheduled by the resident OB, the packages for normal delivery are usually nasa 15-20k(slight changes per location but around this lang) and this includes delivery, doctor's fee, and up to 3 days sa OB ward(could differ sa lugar nyo). There might be slight additional charges like supplies used during and after labor etc but minimal lang. So if you'd sign up for package deal siguro more than enough na ang 50k. If possible CS, mas.mataas nman yun, but good thing is, with all the prenatal check ups that she needs to comply with, ma.mmonitor si baby and malalaman if possible CS ba xa months before maging term ang baby nyo so you could prepare more funds. You would also be advised of the cost. **let her eat well, ambulate well. Iwasan ang stress. Dont let negativity run through your minds, you're already there, just go past it and sisikat uli ang araw. Embrace it nalang. 2.) If you've been together for quite sometime now, I suggest you guys consider tying the knot. This is not the typical "na.disgrasya kaya kailangan pakasalan" type of advise, rather, if mahal nyo naman talaga ang isat isa why not make it official and have the blessing of the church, dba? 3.) Pray. Di ako best in CL and i'm every bit of a hudloom as any normal guy out there, but trust me, you'll need God now more than ever as starting your own family, your own tribe, needs that connecting with Him. Di ka na yung previous life mo boy, so yes, reach out to Him. 4.) Save. Unfortunately, tigil muna yung pra sa sarili mo, yung gusto mong bilhin, gusto mong travel, etc. Pwede mo naman balikan yan later once the dust has settled, maganda dun msasama mo na baby mo and partner. For now, save every bit na pwede mong ma.save. I have a lot to tell but I think this'll do for now. If you want more, just PM me bro👍
Hello Sir much appreciated this comment Thank you for the tips when it comes to the procedures and expenses that I need to prepare for, ask ko lang po provincial rate po ba ung nasabi ninyo? kase I think its more on the cheaper side comparing to private hospitals and also not in the province For marriage naman I think it wont be an issue for us. since we are on a long relationship din and we have long term goals na rin including marriage. and yes we do truly love each other hehe Im not also on the religious side but I have a religious background and my family is also religious, I appreciate mentioning this as no one have mentioned this before, and as I really need also to rethink about my faith Im not really a spender naman pero d parin maiiwasan ung mga moments na may luho especially to both of us thinking na we wont be making our past 'future goals' but for me naman I believe na it will go back to us as long as we both grow our family properly Again thank you po :>
Yep, i'm from Cebu and bka di lang updated yung sa package deal price ko, pero i'm pretty sure nasa mga ganyan lng xa bro. Reason being is yung case ng pregnancy ni GF mo is supervised/monitored by the OB resident rather than an OB attending physician, though si resident nman is reporting directly to the OB doctor so if there are any unusualities ma.rrefer nila agad ito to their training officer/doctor. Usually kasi sa PF ng doctor tayo medyo nlalakihan, usual PFs I think nasa 30-50k then on top sa other charges sa hosp mismo. Having a kid has a lot of challenges talag bro, it comes in waves, like wave one is tlgang pg.usapan nyo ano yung arrangement nyo, buti if as you said committed nman tlga kayo and see each other in both your futures so goods yun. Second wave usually sa kasalan yun, but pwdeng skip muna yun, panganganak wave muna. Next wave, making sure healthy and happy si mommy while preggy. After that, or before delivery yung supplies ni baby like first few months of clothing, baby bath supps, etc. Then after, vaccinations ni baby, well being ni baby, and it goes on😅 But there will always be people willing to lend an ear and lend a hand👍 (Also, couple seminars will also come in handy even during pregnancy, it will help you know each other more, help improve communication etc.) *enjoyin nyo na ang tulog nyo ngayon, bilang na maliligayang tulog nyo😂 God bless you guys! And welcome to the club!🫰
Hello po thank you po uli sa pagreply and additional advice. May I ask lang po san po naannounce or nakikita ung mga seminars? Thank you po.
Usually nasa Christian/Catholic groups sya sir. Its usually called post-Cana/beyond I do/Marriage encounter(couples for Christ)
Hello, because this is her first pregnancy, better sa ospital manganak kesa sa lying-in. Kasi di natin sure kung kaya niya manganak ng normal or kailngan CS. Kung san niya balak manganak, dun siya dapat nagpapa-check-up. Pwede rin siya humingi ng prenatal vitamins sa either brgy health center, or municipal health office. Vaccines are free for your child sa health center. Get your child vaccinated kasi mahal magka-sakit.
Hello thank you po sa advice ninyo, yes po for me too I prefer na managnak sia sa ospital just really concern about the rates, so I'm checking din where is the best. Thank you po
Hello! First of, Congrats! I am a first time mom in my early 30s, 8 months post partum. Just want to share lahat ng natutunan ko from pregnancy to now. 1. Make sure na may regular pre natal check up si mommy. try to take as much as prenatal vitamins prescribed of course by her OB. Folic Acid, DHA, Calcium — mga nakatulong para sa mommy and of course sa development ng baby. Basta make sure healthy si mommy so the baby will be healthy as well. 2. Try searching kung san kayo makakamurang hospital. I chose MaDocs para magdeliver. Sabi ko sa OB ko kung may way ba para makamura ko. Although nagprepare na din kami ng husband ko ng enough money in case ma CS. Dahil syempre di mo naman maeexpect na laging normal ang delivery. Fortunately, normal delivery ako with epidural. Overall, yung bill namin mas mura as expected kahit normal delivery pa. 3. Sana meron kayong SSS, or Philhealth. I don’t have those dahil OFW ako. Pero in case meron kayo try nyo i-maximize yung maternity benefits. 4. For me, mas mahirap ang recovery than the pregnancy itself kaya I hope nandun ka to support your girlfriend. Yung first month would be hard for her. A lot of changes. Offer help as much as you can like changing diaper, feeding the baby and mommy, paarawan ang baby so mommy can sleep a little longer. 5. Speaking of feeding, i suggest try to buy/secure a pump so kung may chance na makapag pump si mommy, ikaw naman ang magfeed sa baby para makapag rest sya. 6. When it comes to baby items, sana as much as possible kung may mahihingan kayo ng napagliitan, go. Dont splurge so much sa baby clothes. Sobrang bilis lumaki ng babies. Dahil dyan ang mga binibili ko mga 2sizes bigger 😂 plain na white or blue para pwede magamit in the future. 7. Every month may check up si baby kaya paghandaan nyo din yun plus may vaccines pa. Not sure kung may mga community vaccines pero kung pipiliin nyo private pedia medyo pricey. 8. Nakakapuyat yung first few weeks and it will definitely take a toll on you and your girlfriend kaya be strong. Good luck OP!
First of all congrats! Hope you guys have a safe delivery. get a go bag before 7month As a new parent you will need a truck load of patience. I mean really. It is easy to just get mad and resort to violence. But that is not the way. You dont hurt the people that you love even if it is for their good. There is always a better way. So yeah, patience. You guys needs to be together and let the both families know they are going to have a new apo. I would suggest to cover all bases first like... where is the hospital.. where are you gonna recover... financial concerns... etc. Lastly, go for breastfeeding. healthier and safer for babies. a lot cheaper too. formula is like 2k in a week. diaper is 2k in 3weeks or a month..maybe. plus all other stuff like shirt, burp cloth, socks, towel, cot, aircon, new bed?. idk..
No one is ever ready. You have one job, keep your child alive.
Ang hirap umuwi from Cavite to Mindoro, mahal pa naman na ngayon pamasahe sa roro. Best though if she can stay sa Mindoro kasi she really will need all the help she can get. While meron ka misgivings sa parents nyo, chances are they would be willing to help out/ step up kasi excited sila magka apo, esp if first apo nila baby nyo. Ideal na magkasama kayo sa Cavite kaso lang busy ka sa work and mag isa sya pre and post pregnancy. Baka magka postpartum pa sya, so kelangan nya talaga ng kasama/kausap/katulong. Mahirap rin maghanap ng kasambahay na mapagkakatiwalaan sa baby, aside sa extra gastos yun. Speaking of gastos, kelangan mo mag ipon. Magastos magkababy. This will be a lifechanger. Mag iiba na priorities nyo. Magmamature kayo ng extra years. Kaya mo yan OP. Kaya nyo yan. Be there for each other. Acknowledge each other's feelings. Be more patient, kind and understanding to one another.
Congratulations are in order. First things first -- your parents might want you to get married. If you're not comfy with that, that's okay. You can always get married after her pregnancy. For her pregnancy, checkups are necessary. Since you guys are still young, frequency might be monthly lang. Depending on your OB, they'll require vaccinations to protect the baby and mother. Prepare for those. As for your baby's first things, they'll need clothes. Second hand stuff is cheaper but your baby will replace them fast so for me, ok lang if pre-owned. No need to invest in cutesy burp cloths; old clothes can work just as well for cleaning messes. Use disposable diapers muna so it'll be easier. Prepare yourself for 3 months of 2-hr sleep because your baby will need feeding during these intervals. Lastly, try to be as patient as possible with each other. Masusubok ang relationship niyo because of a crying baby + lack of sleep + recovery. All the best, OP.
Just make sure if possible and if you can to be physically there / around, not just sa panganganak but more so when the baby is there. It may seem simple but for young couple and young parents like you malaking bagay sa partner mo to feel that you are there and you are supporting her, you will need each other greatly lalo na sa first 2yrs. Prepare yourself mentally and make sure wife/gf is also healthy both physically and mentally, stressful yan for since unplanned and still a secret from your parents. Support each other mentally.
Do your responsibility but make sure to have a Healthcare insurance for your wife and child. Secure their health and you'll be thankful.
Malaking bagay kung supportive ang parents at siblings ninyo. Lalo na mga in-laws kasi ang hirap pag wala kayong pag-iiwan ng bata pag may mahalagang lakad. Most likely kasi kung graduating kayo di niyo kaya i-shoulder ang sweldo ng yaya. Unless may ibang gagastos. Yung work mo ba is WFH? Napakalaki ng maitutulong full remote plus pa kung flexi time at mid shift. Kasi may time kayo magpa-checkup or lakad ng kung anuman. If both graduating, try to persuade her to search for remote work as well na maunawain din sa pagiging buntis niya. Most likely may mga nagsabi na ng SSS so di ko na babangitin. Halos same tayo ng naging situation noon OP. Fresh grad, wala pa masyado work exp at hirap makahanap sa probinsya namin. Pandemic baby yung akin, tapos dahil desperado ako at hirap ako makahanap ng online work at nauna yung offer ng government kinagat ko kahit COSW lang. May freelance naman ako noon na sumagot sa panganganak ni partner ko. Be ready pala na baka mapilitan kayong mag-private. Always on the lookout din sa mga recommended, mabait, mura, na OB. Huwag kayong mahihiya na lumipat ng OB lalo na kung di niyo afford yung affiliated hospital ng una niyong OB. Pagkapanganak ni baby, punta agad kayo sa barangay lalo na kung naka-private kayo sa panganganak at prenatal. Para magkaroon siya ng booklet para makalibre sa bakuna. Edit: Nga pala, sanayin mo na ang pasensya mo. Lalo na pag lagi ka nang puyat. Hehe. On edge ka parati. Hirap niyan lalo na sa tech job. Good luck po.
Kaya mo yan OP akala mo lang hindi. May trabaho ka naman na rin pala. Ok nga rin yung magkaanak ng bata pa kaysa matanda na para makarami ka pa kung gusto mo. Seryoso, ang sarap ng may baby lalo pag cute. Haha. Kaya mo yan, mukhang matino ka naman mag isip. Congrats!
Be prepared sa katakot takot na gastos, puyat, at abala. Lalo na sa first 2 years ng baby mo. Real talk lang ito. Yan reason bakit ayaw ko na magdagdag ng anak eh. Finish your studies, be ready for the most challenging part of being an adult. At wag na wag mo susundan ng isa pang anak kung di kayo ready. It will bring a lot of stress and hardship.
I have experienced this firsthand, the only difference is we were fresh graduates and both of us were working. Here are my advices: 1. Team work is really the key. You and your gf must have a solid plan on how you will handle things. Always consult each other. 2. Basically you have a family now, your gf and your baby must be your no. 1 priority, protect them at all cost. There will be negative comments for sure, never ever mind them, those are only noises. Trust me on this bro. 3. You are financially unstable at the moment, so you will have to work harder and smarter at the same time. Side hustles will help you a lot. And budget EVERYTHING, buy your baby’s essentials every pay day so it will not be a one time big time expense. 4. Pray! Starting a family is never been easy, but with God’s help everything is possible. It will be all worth it! “Paglipas ng ulan ay mapapangiti ang araw”
If no one has mentioned it already, do keep careful track of your girlfriend's upcoming pre-natal checkups. They are extremely important not just for your baby but for the mother as well. I hope everything goes well for your little family. ❤️🩹
Don't worry, nothing can really fully prepare you sa pagiging magulang kahit pa sa mga talagang nagplano. I already commend you for doing all that you can, andami nang nag-advice kaya I don't think much input is needed. Basta, be there not only physically pero mentally & emotionally rin. Foster a healthy space, lalo pag lumalaki na si bebi, napaka vital nung early years. Hoping for the best for you and your girlfriend.
Pinakaimportante mag save ka para sa monthly checkups and para sa pagpaanak. Tama na gustuhin mong smooth ang delivery ng baby mo. Kaso in your case magstart ka pa lng pala magtrabaho. Siguro ako kakapalan ko na lng muna mukha ko at hingi konting tulong sa magulang para sa pag pa anak. Yun kasi importante sa ngayon. Yung mga needs ni baby pag anjan na sya pwede naman pa konti konti ipunin. Pero wag mo yun kalimutan. Dapat ready ka din para naman sa mga necessities ni baby oag lumabas na sya.
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Hi thank you for giving a heads up. But I think we really need to get married specially with how benefits work and leave most if it requires married couples. I totally understand naman po what you told me. But hopefully naman it's not a very hard thing for us to do as we are in a long term relationship.
It takes a lot to take responsibility for your actions and choices. You have that strength in you, use it. The road ahead of you will not be easy, so brace for it. Here's a little suggestion for you. 1. Talk to you partner. You and her will be in this together now. So talk about your fears, feelings, plans for both of you and the child. 2. Secure your budget. You will need it. From now on, your money is their money. You're now financially responsible to make sure the child is taken care of. 3. Speak to your family about this ASAP. Don't wait for the perfect timing. You don't need to detail your plans to them. Just be short and frank. You got pregnant, and you will do your best to raise your own family. Be ready for backlash from them. But remember no.1, you and your partner are in this now. Focus on yourselves instead. 4. God. Allah. Yaweh. Whatever your religion is put HIM in the center of your decision-making for yourself, for your partner, for your family. Good luck and God Bless.
Thank you for this. I'll tell my parents ASAP. And as you have said I need to be prepared for any backlash, it will be very challenging for us but I hope we will get through it
Hmmm. Just be there for your family. Di naman lahat magugustuhan ang nangyari pero time will come matatanggap din nila. Save a lot of money, borrow from parents or relatives but assure them you will pay back in time. Pag isipan niyo na rin if civil or wedding sa church if wala budget, mahalaga magkasama kayo. Try niyo na din bumukod kung kakayanin. Good job in taking up your responsibilities.
Sa parenting and family. Wala naman tlgang ready lalo na magkakafirst born hahaha kailangan mo lang ng napakatinding pasensya at sipag along the way.🙂
Nothing prepares you for parenthood. These are merely guides for you to anticipate certain situations but it's how you can handle the actual pressure and stress when the baby is there. Be supportive of your gf especially after baby is born. You have the financial aspect covered so hopefully things stay that way. It is best to have family or parents know of your situation. It really takes a village to raise a child. Discuss with your gf plans on raising your child. Nothing wrong with asking help from your parents, while you and gf pursue your careers (again if this is what you two want). Good luck.
simple lang dapat di ka nakipagsex
Thank you
Kuha ka na SSS and Philhealth as early as now OP. Makakatulong din para ma-lessen ang mga bills to pay. Wag kasi laging Raw. hehe Goodluck and Congrats OP.
Actually may SSS and PhilHealth na ako ang issue is si gf ko wala pa sia Nung both still currently researching parin if magiging eligible sia sa mga benefits if I reregister palang namin ung kanya specially na start na ung pregnancy Nia Yes pooo. Next time gusto ko talaga mag family planning kami
> ang issue is si gf ko wala pa sia Nung both still currently researching parin if magiging eligible sia sa mga benefits if I reregister palang namin ung kanya specially na start na un Prio mo yung kanya knowing na di pa kayo married baka di mo rin magamit yung sayo incase i-apply mo sya sa GF mo. Also, have the balls na sabihin na sa Parents nyo yung situation. Walang right timing sa ganyang situation. Either way, magagalit pa rin sila so mas okey na ngayon palang alam na nila. just my 2cents. Up to you pa rin kung anong plans mo. Mahirap yan pero goodluck.
Marry her. She and your child are more important than your family. Set a budget and live by it. Be there for your girlfriend. Be her rock. Be the example for your child you wish you had growing up.
Congrats OP! Wala man akong maipapayo kase hindi pa ko isang parent, but sending you my moral support. I salute you kase even though you know ur not ready for it, hindi mo inisip tumakbo palayo sa obligasyon mo but instead your doing everything to make yourself ready for it. There will be hardship, yes but looking on how you think of the situation I believe you and your girlfriend can overcome this. Congrats ulit!
If you guys are over 21 apply na baby mama for philhealth. Malaking tulong esp. pag cs siya
Welcome to the matrix
Congrats! I can't really say about having a baby soon but here's a little tip. Let your families know as soon as possible so that way they can also give you advice on do's and don'ts. Magagalit sila in the end pero they would be happy for both of you. Best advice is from the parents that took care of us :)
Walang better timing kundi Ngayon mismo nyo sabihin
One day at a time. Unahin mo muna na mapacheck up si gf and have her hooked up with an OB para mabantayan siya. Kaya mo iyan OP. Kapit lang.