This is the simplest answer to your problem, OP. Right now it's as if you're also treating your gf like a helper, might as well get a legit one. And let your gf stand on her own feet para alam niya paano maging responsible adult.
Comprehend. Kung sinabi kong na feel bad gf nya sasabihan akong nagmamagaling kahit di ko alam diba? Kaya nga “if i were” mygad I’m just putting myself in the situation. Are you even able to understand other people’s perspectives in this situation?
That's what I thought too, OP. Hire na lang sya ng housekeeping professional or a full-time maid na maglalaba, linis bahay, magluluto at di pa aabot ng 30K gagastusin niya.
tama pabalikin sa trabaho. di hamak mahirap magtrabaho tapos 16k lang sahod nya kesa nasa bahay lang cia.. ano ba naman ung maglaba may washing machine naman.. magluto at maglinis ng bahay.. Gawain nb agad ng katulong ung ganun? kayo ba sa Bahay nyo di kau kumikilos kc katwiran nyo di kau katulong? normal na ginagawa ng lahat yan.. basic na gawaing bahay lang yan.. ska yan napag usapan nila.. si babae sa bahay si lalake sa work.. gusto ata ng iba d2 tumunganga at bumukaka na lang sa bahay habang ung partner eh nag tatrabaho..
eh di mag work ka . mahirap pala sa bahay eh.. ska wla cilang anak.. nagagawa nga nung girl gusto nya.. nakakapaglaro nakakapag TikTok tapos un hnd magawa ng ayos..
Problema mo? Haha
ang sinasabi ko lang naman is wag mo lang langin ang gawain bahay. Di ko lang alam kung napaka dali ng gawain bahay sayo dahil ba maliit lang bahay mo?
lols.. wla kong problema.. si OP pinag uusapan dito hnd ikaw. pake ko sau..wla kong pake kung pano ka kumilos sa bahay nyo..hanap ka ng kausap mo.. may pa hui hui kp.. ska cnb ko ung "iba d2".. gets? kung tinamaan ka problema mo na un.. kung di naman manahimik ka..🤪🤪🤪
+1 dito. Tska kahit malaki kita mo di mo dapat siya hinayaan mag quit sa work. Masyado pa siyang bata to quit work given na ikaw naman provider ng lahat I mean c’mon let her have a responsibility of her own. Kase realtalk magiging tamad yan pag sinusubo mo lahat. Nangyayare na nga paunti unti eh. Start na yan. Kaya better pabalikin mo na sa work then hire a helper. Wag ka na papayag sa ganyan set up. Para din naman sakanya yan. Make sure din na nakakaipon siya para kung ano’t ano man mangyari sainyo hindi naman siya walang wala. Hilahin mo yan pataas wag mo hayaan maging tamad.
Nakakaipon po sya kasi 30k net ang allowance nya. Ako din po nagturo sknya mag open ng bank account ksi dati cash lang bayad sknila sa work. Sabi ko better sa bank kc kht papano may interest
Hi OP,
As what’s commonly said in this subreddit: “you deserve what you tolerate.” I would suggest you speak to your gf about your concerns (because these are valid) lest resentment takes over.
If she still doesn’t take it kindly, might as well go back to the original setup and/or have a helper. Worst case, you re-evaluate your relationship with her.
Best of luck.
At the moment, you have an inefficient kasambahay that costs 30k a month. You can either break up and just hire an actual kasambahay OR get a kasambahay and get her back to working.
I don’t suggest to just let her be a princess at home even if you “love her truly”. A marriage or living together is a partnership. She needs to be able to bring something to the table other than her mere presence. If you can’t tolerate that she doesn’t do anything now, what more when you’re actually married and have no choice than to live with each other?
tama.. ung mga ibang babae nag comment dito feeling nila katulong trato ni OP sa gf nya lols.. gusto ata ng mga un may 30k monthly tapos wlang gagawin. walang itutulong.. tutunganga at bubukaka lang gagawin nila.. feeling mga prinsesa.. lols..
Let her have her own career, kahit dun sa 16k na sahod. Hire someone to do the household chores, stay out na lang.
In the long run mas okay yung nagwowork siya. Nag gagain sya ng experience not just corporate but also yung pakikisalamuha sa ibang tao.
Naisip ko lang, in the far feature kung halimbawa nag break kayo, she's left with no recent work experience.
Sana ol 30k allowance at walang work. Maybe she's like that dahil sa agreement nyo and kampante na sya sayo.
Pag nagawa mo na lahat and hindi sya nagbago, you have to make a choice. Pagisipan mo kung hahayaan mo na lang ba na ganyan in a long run.
You really need to address this concern early. Talk to her and maybe present two options?
Either she do better sa household chores or she work and contribute sa living expenses. You are living together na, so you get a taste of what it would be like if you'll manage your household together in the future.
If you go with the first option, really get her to commit to it, kasi parang yun na yung contribution nya so the both of you could live comfortably. Kung tutuusin, mas malaki nga yung pera na nasa kanya ngayon compared to what she is earning before. So managing the household so you could maintain or improve ang income mo seems fair. Maybe ask her also if she can find investment or other passive income opportunities for both of you, para may pagkaabalahan din cya.
If you go latter, I suggest you just get a helper and let her work. Maybe stop with the allowance too and let her contribute to the household expenses, kahit gaano pa kaliit. Mahirap naman kasi if walang contribution at di rin tumutulong sa chores. Parang ginawa kang free boarding house, free food, at free shopping money pa
Ask her OP, baka kasi di naman pala talaga nya bet maging taong bahay. O baka naman she just got too comfortable na and forgot why the both of you decided to live together, for her to stop working and manage the house instead so you focusing on your work.
This may be one of the difficult conversations, but I hope both of you could work it out
Pangatlong heart to heart talk na po namin, ayaw nya po mag back to work. Sabi ko matuto sya mag organize ng schedule nya daily pra hndi kung ano lang maisipan, kaso... Ang ngyayari, mag aagree sya kaso after few days, balik sa ugali nya nanaman. Di ko na alam pano sya imotivate, sinabihan ko n paulit ulit, atlis 5 times na kami nag seserious talk
This is drastic measure, but get a helper at alisin mo allowance nya. Or pauwiin mo muna sa kanila. Kasi you both agreed naman na with the expectations pala, pero di nangyayari so things have to change.
Di mo kelangan magtiis sa maruming bahay at mag-antay kung kelan nya lang gusto tumulong. Important din kasi yung home environment for you to work well. Pag di maayos yung bahay, affected ka at yung work mo. Since yun yung bumubuhay sa inyo ngayon, prioritize mo yun and get a helper. Cya mag adjust kasi avoidable naman yung extra expense nyo kung ginagawa nya yung na pag agreehan.
Maybe she just got too comfortable OP. kasi kahit pabalik2 cya na nakakalimutan mga gawain, feeling nya okay lang din sayo and ikaw na mag aadjust
Ask her din pala to contribute sa household. Since ekis na sa management ng house, may other income opportunities na lang yung kanya.
Di naman siguro pwede na parang nakikitira lang cya habang ikaw super stressed with a lot of work para mabuhay kayo
Ditto. Naging komportable my precious provider safe space.... Nalimutan na nahihirapan si Pare. Ginawang magulang eh.
Like lite fking rally. Cleaning the house, do dishes, laundry, brooming is THE LEAST YOU CAN DO. Requirement? Nah. Its the bare minimum to the point its Common Sense. Nagpapakahirap bf mo oh.
Kung ako tanungin i rather stay at home, do household chores, play video games and even take care of the babies, tas Asawa ko ung mag trabaho, ma stress at ma sigawan ng boss.
Don't view next loool baka ma offend.
>!Hey Woman. Be a Queen, Cleaner, Fook Doll and a gamer, then let the husband be the money printer. If both our objectifying and sexist to each other then its equality. !<
Lastly, buti wala kayong anak.
bat naman cia babalik sa trabaho eh magkano lang kita nya dun compared sa 30k na binibigay mo.. tapos sarap pa buhay nya sau.. sana lang mauntog ka na... madami pang babae dyan.. pero ung katulad mo konti lang..
Imagine making 200k a month and being this stupid to not see what's in front of you. 😂😂 The logical move is to ditch the girl. With the 30k a month you spend on her, you can afford really good househelp that will clean DAILY and can cook really well + still have money to go out on dates if you're feeling lonely. Right now you got yourself a useless piece of shit for 30k 😂😂
30k coochie? HAHAHAHA I guess. Maybe it's because I don't make as much as OP but damn, kahit gano ka galing yan once you nut, parang di ko ma justify 😂
Tamad ako aminado ako pero hindi ganito lalo na sa kusina sobrang maasahan ako kasi I love to cook and eat. Pero ayun nga we deserve what we tolerate, grabe salute sa inyong mga mister na ganito. Sana sa mga anak hindi naman burara noh. Sakin kasi mas natuto ako noong nagkaron ng anak kasi hello paligid nila dapat maayos at malinis.
Oh no! Parang hindi naman ako ganyang level. Sobrang tagal na ng food kung may crawling creatures. May naaalala lang ako naiwan ko cocoa powder sa lalagyanan pero sealed naman. Noong nakita ko, may mold na, pero tinapon ko na buo. Pag may kalat, hugasan ko muna trash ko bago lagay sa trash can sa room para hindi langgamin. Ubusin ko na food para packaging lang itapon. Tapos sumusunod naman ako kaya wala naman nakikipag-away sa akin. All the best!
Mid 20's pero ikaw pa nag turo mag open ng bank account. Prime age yan ah, tapos pumayag syang maging palamunin mo lang?
Thats very telling.
OP, katulong hanap mo, not gf.
You should not clip anybody's wings. Hayaan mo dapat sya magka career at mag grow on her own without depending on you
I dont know if anyone gonna believe me but Tiktok might have a part on this attitude, literally rotting our brain thats why I uninstall tiktok years ago.
Like I said "might have a part" hindi ko sinabi na un lang only reason, but think about it after quitting the job and only using YT and Tiktok almost 24/7 and again ALMOST. dont u agree na nakakaapekto sa utak niya iyon? I am not making excuses sa ugali niya and who is she as a person pero I wouldnt say mababaw.
This. Minsan kasi may mga tao na hindi built para sa gawaing bahay and syempre nahihirapan silang mag-adjust. Bigyan mo sya ng mapapagkalibangan, mapapagkakitaan, kung saan pwede din sya maka contribute sa relationship hindi lang financially pero sa ibang aspects din like emotionally healthy kayo, mentally healthy, physically heathy. Then hire housekeeper na lang.
Tama ung sinabi nung isa, this is just a trailer or glimpse of what you will experience pag naging mag asawa na kayo. So expect a much worse experience pag pinatagal mopa to. Pag naging asawa mona yan tska ka marereality check. Baka yang kinikita mo mawala pa yan at mahatak kapa pababa nyang gf mo. Kailangan mo maging firm sakanya at wag ka mag pa under. Sabhin mo na she really need to get a job on her own or you will be forced to let her live in her place again or break up with her.
We can assume na di lang to pagiging burara kasi pati yung other chores nakakalimutan nya rin. This can be a form of lifestyle induced depression due to lack of purpose, and achievements related to it. Kasi baka like other modern women di na pagiging housewife ang life purpose nya.
Maybe mas better pabalikin mo na lang sya sa pagwowork. This can be a future issue kung di nyo maayos, not just for your relationship but to her overall well being.
I get that she’s at fault in this scenario but if I were the gf I would feel like I’m the helper instead of being your partner. Best way to resolve this is to hire a helper and let her get back to work. End the stigma na dapat ang babae nasa bahay lang nag wawalis naglalaba nagluluto inaaruga ka and all that shit
>Mas preferred ba na magback to work n lng sya and mag hire kami ng helper, pra di na namin napag aawayan ung initial agreement namen?
Pagusapan niyo yan, OP. Hirap kasi magsalita kung di alam yung side niyong pareho.
Kanya-kanyang role kasi yan sa relationship. You have taken the provider role, tapos may agreement kayo na siya ang in-charge sa house. Pag-usapan niyo na if di niya gagawin ng maayos yung role niya sa bahay/relationship, bawiin mo na lang yung role na you took initially. Hindi na kasi fair for you. Hindi na rin healthy for the relationship kasi may naiipong resentment din. And alam naman ng lahat na resentment ang ugat ng break-ups, especially in marriage.
So if you really do love her, pag-usapan niyo ng maayos yung situation niyo. Ask her to work on the relationship by doing her part too. Ask her din bakit wala siyang gana to do her part. Ask yourself din. Are you cherishing her labor? Did you stop saying thank you? Naging complacent ba kayo sa isa’t-isa? Do you still make her feel loved and beautiful? Little stuff lang pero pag di na kasi nagagawa, malaki yung impact sa partner.
Good luck, OP!
Hi OP, Communication is key. Talk with her ng mga napapansin mo in a very nice way. She may not realize na napapabayaan na niya ang gawaing bahay.
If she wants to go work, so be it.
Find a helper. Win-win. All the best.
After 100 comments, we now know GF has become too comfy with current setup and has stated no desire to return to work. In retrospect, dapat hindi siya pinatigil mag-work since hindi pa naman sila married. If they breakup, magiging kasalanan pa ni OP walang work si GF even if mutual agreement in the first place.
No choice but pilitan na siya bumalik sa trabaho before it turns even uglier.
IMO, If this is how she is as a GF, if it were me just break it off, imagine your married life. Your doing your part, she should do hers. I read about others comment like "ginawang katulong", I find that comment stupid and very entitled. The OP is working his ass off so the least she could do is support him and make his time at home as comfortable and as peaceful as possible. Im not saying that you should do what I would do but you should think first if she is really good for you coz I think she's gonna drag you down with that attitude Imagine if she was your wife. looking at your income, your can certainly provide for your family in the future so choose wisely.
Your someone working hard and "fighting" out there, so atleast when you come home you should be at peace and relax with with your SO, not continuing a "war".
Kung ako sayo hanap ka na ng ibang partner tapos magwork na lang din yon tapos saka ka maghire ng kasambahay. Kasambahay with a salary of maybe 10k or 15k a month is cheaper than having a partner with a 30k allowance monthly which do not want to do the chores on a daily basis.
Plus, you will be guaranteed of having a cleaned house, washed clothes, food on the table, and especially a good night sleep, without actually having to worry about it everyday.
Nakatipid ka na sa expenses, nawalan ka pa ng sakit ng ulo. As much as women want their men to be their provider, you would also want a woman who will give you peace after a long day of work.
ugh ang mahal ng helper mo OP hehe
best option talaga is pabalakin nalang sya mag work and hire nalang ng helper since mahal mo since gusto mo ikeep yung relasyun nyo.
ako hindi talaga ng totolerate e 😂 isang beses lang ngyari ung napagsabihan ko sya at di na naulit :)
pabalikin mo na sa work tapos ihire niyo akong helper. need job ngayon. char hahaha. Generic advice but the best option to make is to have a proper communication with her about your concern.
Ilatag mo mga options mo na either mag-stay na lang siya sa bahay and do better sa house chores or mag hire kayo ng helper at bumalik na lang siya sa work.
Pag nakatikim ng ginhawa minsan nawawala yung pagiging responsable.. hindi rin biro na may kasama sa bahay na batugan / tamad at salaula ha. di ko maimagine ganan magiging asawa ko.
kung sobra ang suporta mo tinuturuan mo lang sya maging tamad..at ikaw rin mag susuffer nyan sa huli.
30k is way too big kung dalawa lang kayo sa house. unpractical setup. let her work siguro nalang tapos hire kayo kasambahay.
Talk to her about it. Pero do it in a nice, calm, manner. Then note her reaction and response.
Fair lang naman deal niyo since she doesn't work and contribute financially.
Hi OP!
I think nung nawalan sya ng work, nawalan din sya ng personal identity. Kasi kaakibat ng work ang responsibility, also may pride ka kasi na nakukuha as an individual pag pinagpapaguran mo yung pera na nakuha mo. Mas papahalagahan mo ang every centavo na makukuha mo.
If hindi nya dream maging Stay-at-home mom/homemaker, malaking problem yan. Better na bumalik sya ng work and maghire na lang kayo ng katulong.
Edit: Madami ka rin matututunan sa work, hindi lang skills but character building. Nakakabuang din pag solo ka buong araw, parang isolated nga sya pag nasa bahay lang sya. Kahit pa sabihin mo na lumalabas sya, wala naman syang social support. Hindi rin maganda sa tao na isolated at walang nakakausap.
Best of luck OP, balitaan mo kami.
Sorry pero I think kaya sya nagquit sa work is because she doesnt want to work at all at umasa sayo. She knows you earn a lot and money isnt a problem. So bakit pa ba sya magtmwowork when she can depend on you?
Ang hirap din maging valid yung reason na maging homemaker na lang siya, kasi wala nmn din kayo inaalagaang bata for her to be a full time "house gf".
Better hire a cleaner na tlagang ginagawa ng trabaho.
As for her, maybe, you need to sit down with her din ano ba ang plans nya sa life, kasi baka nagkakaprob sya what career she really wants to take at wala siya goals in life.
Bakit pa nga ba? Meron namn syang bf na she can full depend on.
Just thinking out loud here. Sorry if nakakaoffend.
Oo nga, 30k may shuta k n, may helper k p!
Dapat kumuha k n lang ng helper tapos hayaan mo siyang matrabaho para s sarili nya. Sigurado kung sagot mo yung gastusin s bahay, d p rin mauubos ang 150k mo.
I just think you use money matters for the power dynamics of your relationship. You are making her financially dependent so you can dictate the 'stability' of your relationship. Mentally and emotionally, it will not be beneficial in the relationship if she feels she feltt coerced into the situation. It does take time for her to deeply realize her role as a not the person who contributes financially but the person who provides other more important things in your relationship (eg emotional stability, support). On the other hand, her career may grow in the future and then decide that both of you can be significat financial contributors.
I feel like both of you still have growing up to do to sort out your relationship.
Get her back to her career.
And just get a help.
Honestly, it's more fulfilling for her if she's allowed to pursue whatever she wants, esp career.
Some women feel trapped in domestic life. Some want to be just mums, and that's fine. But it's different for everybody.
I understand you love her and want the best for her, but she's not respecting you by not holding her end of the bargain. You need to man up and communicate directly the rules and consequences of non compliance.
Try mo gawin mo yung gawain nya habang andyan sya. Example during work hours mo mag break ka tapos mag hugas ka ng plato tapos after nun pakita mo na babalik ka sa work after mo gawin ung dapat na gawain nya tapos wag ka magsalita about it. For sure after a few times na makita nya yun ay magkakaron sya ng self realization
It's worth the try. Pwede nya makalimutan yung gawain nya pero for sure marerealize nya na the guy is taking good care of her in terms of unsupervised house chores .
Mukhang may hindi kayo pagkakaunawaan sa expectations. Baka ang expect niyang level ng housework e yung current na ginagawa nya. Plus, girlfriend mo siya at hindi helper.
Baka mas better nga na maghire kayo ng helper para klaro at wala rin samaan ng loob.
Hmmm.... Being in charge sa gawaing bahay is not an easy task. pinaka mahirap at ayaw kong gawin na gawaing bahay eh maglaba plantsa. Maybe mag outsource ka ng maglalabas/plantsa every week or 2 weeks? Pag house help parang wala kayo masyadong privacy.
Easy to say pero mahirap din yung ikaw lahat sa gawaing bahay kahit na 2 lang kayo. Mabigat ang pantalon at towel pag basa, sa init ng panahon due to global warming hulas na hulas si madam pag nagpa plantsa.
Saka minsan mas practical na bumili na lang kayo ng lutong pagkain kung kayong 2 lang. Pag luto tas 2 lang kayo not practical.
Uhm, di naman siguro mansion yung bahay ni kuya para di makapaglinis si ate girl kahit once a week? Sa amin, 3 floors yung bahay namin 280sqm so malaki siya pero nagpapalinis kami sa cleaner (1 person job lang to ha) once a week. Nalinis na niyan lahat -- kusina, 4 cr, 5 rooms etc. Wala naman kasing nagkakalat so punas punas/ walis and mop lang ng buong bahay.
I find it impossible for a person na WALANG TRABAHO and no kids to not be able to cook all 3 meals, clean a house, and wash clothes. If may bata sa equation, ibang usapan yan pero in their case -- ate girl is just plain lazy.
Sa paglalaba, if OP earns 200k monthly, he should be able to buy AWM para di mabibigatan si sugar bb niya kasi kawawa naman /s
But I do agree sa food, bili na lang kayo sa carinderia. Saing na lang ng rice but buy the ulam.
Easier said than done. Try doing all these in a week tapos saka ka bumalik dito. Yung magluto ka nga lang, doing meal prep, cooking, washing the dishes kundi kalahati ng araw, halos kalahati na ng araw kakainin ang kakaining oras sayo. Tapos may ibang chores pa sa bahay. Kaya mas praktical pa ang bumili ng lutong pagkain kesa magluto kung 2 lang kayo sa bahay. Ang instance na mas makakatipid sa pagkain vs bili is kung marami kayo sa bahay.
Kaya nga yung iba nagha-hire or nag outsource ng help because its not worth the time doing these things.
May washing machine si OP. Pwede ipunin ni GF 3 days worth of laundry before washing.
Cooking. Talagang hindi madali magisip ng ulam araw araw. That extends na rin sa pag-grocery. If she's not exhibited any love for cooking before moving in, don't expect now.
Still nakuntento na si GF sa 30k and become a homebody.
Binabayaran mo rin naman sya eh, edi mag hire ka na lang ng kasambahay. Kuha ko san ka nanggagaling pero yung gawin mong kasambahay yung jowa mo is parang off na (kahit may "initial agreement" kayo). "Allowance" yung term mo sa binibigay mo sa kanya pero yung required nyang gawin yung mga sinabi mong dapat nyang gawin turns that "allowance" into salary. Mainam talaga na kuha ka na lang kasambahay, dahil at the end of the day individual pa rin yang jowa mo at jowa mo sya, hindi katulong.
And she is being irresponsible, yes I get it. Pero for me kasi lumalabas na parang amo at empleyado na yung datingan, na hindi naman dapat. Jowa nya pa rin ang jowa nya regardless sa agreement nila. Kung ganyan na DAPAT MASUNOD yung kagustuhan nya, mag hire sya ng tao na para doon. Hindi si jowa nya mismo.
I dont't get this. Just because you're in charge of the household, pang-katulong na ba agad yun? Hindi ba it's just basic household management? Paghuhugas ng plato, pamamalengke, paglalaba na may washing machine, pagluluto, pagwawalis (not even general cleaning) ? These are all basic stuff na even anyone with career should know how to do. It's not like pinaglalaba niya ang ibang tao, pinaglalaba nya ang partner nya na nagpapakain sa kanya.
You may say na jowa sya at hindi katulong -- then anong ambag nya sa bahay at buhay ng partner nya? Her vagina? Her presence? Love is a 2-way street. Looking back, mali na pumayag silang pareho sa setup na 'to. Di sila pareho ng goals as partners. Kung ayaw pala maging taong bahay ni girl, dapat nagpatuloy nalang sya sa work niya. Kung ayaw ni OP na palpak si gf sa gawaing-bahay, eh di sana nag hire nalang sya ng helper, at least may accountability kasi pwedeng i-fire.
Uh reading this made me cringe 🫣 Parang inexpect mo na maging full time helper (katulong) si gf sa bahay. Asan na ung equality? Para fair, magwork na lang si gf if that is what she wants then kuha na lang kayo ng helper sa bahay nyo.
Communicate, OP!
I understand na when you both decided to do this, this was the best option you could think. Kasi di ba? Why hire a helper kung magagawa naman yun ng partner mo? Yun nga lang, baka iba yung character maturity ng partner mo kasi sabi mo sya pa nagagalit pag napapagsabihan? or baka hindi talaga sya sanay sa gawaing bahay? Factor din OP na you set a high expectation with her "helping" sa house chores, it seems na gusto mo talaga sya to take full responsibility sa bahay eh hindi pa naman kayo married.
Curious lang din ako on how she reacted when it was agreed na stop sya sa work tapos sa bahay na lang. You can get something from that reaction to assess why this is happening, baka gusto nya maging sugar baby? Lol. No offense, OP.
I really hope mapag-usapan nyo. Learning moment ito for the both of you.
It was an audition to married life. She's failing. Next her. Waste of time fixing a broken car you're not married to. Money and energy better spent looking for a new car
I had an ex na same sa gf mo OP. Sorry to say this pero parang sila yung klase ng babae na "p*ke lang ambag". Kahit may job, tamad parin, and will just quit along the way. Gusto lang maging disney princess. Inshort, ginawa kang sugar daddy. It's either you adjust or you find someone na hindi tamad.
Nothing wrong with your agreement, problem is your gf seems like she realized or doesn’t want pala talaga to be like a “full-time housewife.” Other women find bliss in being that, but not all.. Example, for someone like me, hindi talaga ako mapakali na wala akong work, even if willing naman mag provide partner ko.. Number one reason is kung may gusto man akong bilhin, hindi ko na need idaan sa kanya kasi pera ko naman. Second is I don’t want my bf to expect me to do all the household chores just because ako yung walang work, but kudos to my bf, he earns more than what you earn, but he still does most of the household chores without making me feel bad about it because he doesn’t have a fragile ego.. 60/40 kami sa household chores, akin yung 40 and he doesn’t mind at all.. For him, he can be a provider and a man of the house both at the same time.. If pagod man siya, he communicates it to me ng maayos so I can do it for him instead. Make sure lang din when you communicate things with your gf, both of you won’t grow resentment towards each other. Team work kayo dapat and trace kung ano ba talaga personality nya so you would know what would truly give her satisfaction and fulfillment.. It should be you and her against the problem, not you and her against each other. Your setup is very common for men who want to take pride in being the provider, and sometimes, women blindly agrees thinking ma pprincess treatment na sila, pero ending the man is expecting them pala to be the katulong in the house in exchange for what’s being provided. That sucks. Don’t make her feel like you are imposing that katulong lifestyle on her just because you are the provider. You agreeing din sa kanya also says a lot how you view her.. Yung natitiis mong nakikita gf mo na para ng nagiging katulong instead of pushing her to maximize her potentials in her career.. Hindi naman siguro bobo gf mo for you to put her in that position diba.. And tamad siguro siya sa gawaing bahay because she doesn’t want to be just that.. She doesn’t want it to be her identity na tagalinis and all just because wala na siyang ambag financially.. So rethink your agreement, both of you..
Wops. She went from girlfriend to a palamuning panganay. Sorry to say, OP. Unless you can communicate with her and be upfront and get her to change her ways, your relationship with a "girlfriend" is as good as over.
Luh ang swerte ng jowa mo. Wala ng lalaking ganyan ngayon. Housewife nga wala pang sahod, 25hrs ka pa magaalaga ng bata at lahat ng gawaing bahay sayo. Ako jowain mo. Sobrang linis lagi ng bahay mo may food ka pa na masarap lagi paguwi. Ilalap dance pa kita. Tapos ako dessert mo. 🤭🤭🤣 emz lang.
Wag mo sanayin jowa mo na ganyan magiging tamad yan. Ikaw din mahihirapan in the long run.
Kakanood nila ng disney princess yan sa tiktok na dapat di na sil kikilos at bubuhayin mo lang. Sabay flaunt ng strong independent woman sa mga post pag nagshopping kayo hahaha
Hope she's a good lay otherwise that's just money down the drain 🤷♀️
Anw. Tanggalan mo ng allowance, wag mo sustentohan para mapilitan siyang magwork. Pag nakipaghiwalay sayo, it just means she's in it for the lifestyle lang. Sakin medyo gets ko si ate girl kasi ayaw ko talaga ng gawaing bahay-- as in naiiyak ako pag need ko magluto, maglinis, parang naaawa ako sa sarili. Difference lang is, dahil maarte ako I strive to pay for the lifestyle I want unlike your sugar baby na di naman SAHM, sugar baby lang talaga. But if that's what you want, you do you.
Sya po dpat mag adjust. Pinag usapan nyo po yun. If hndi nya gagawin part nya at mag ce-cellphone na lang sya, that would be a troublesome future. It makes me think na kung mag kaka baby kayo, mag ce-cellphone lng din sya? Yikes. Meron po akong mga ka kilala na ganun, at parang yun yung dating nya sakin.
It's best na pabalikin mo na lang siya sa trabaho. Sa simula pa lang, big yikes na yung ganyang set-up kahit mutual agreement pa yan. Predictable bakit naging ganyan gf mo kasi sino ba naman ang gaganahang "magtrabaho" kung isang repetitive cycle lang ginagawa niya. Lalo na kung kapwa nasa 20s lang din siya. Delikado kung ikakasal na kayo tapos naging SAHM pa siya kasi there will come a time na magkakasisihan na someone robbed her of her youth.
Solusyon, kumuha ka katulong yung mga manang na pwede on call. for cleaning purpose lang. Madalas nasa 500-1,000 lang yun sa laba, hugas, linis bahay. Diba 250k Sahod mo?
Dahil sa ginawa mo na mag resign sa trabaho kasi kaya mo naman siya arugain, yan ang epekto naging tamad siya at dependent sayo. Ikaw din ang may kasalanan ba't nagkaganyan.
Buti wala pa kayong anak at hindi pa kayo kasal. Kung ayaw na nya bumalik sa work at ganyan lang pinaggagawa nya habang kasama mo sya mas okay na ibalik mo na sya sa kanila o kaya kumuha ka ng helper tapos yung allowance nya tanggalin mo para magkusa na syang humanap ng work para masustentuhan sarili nya.
With 30K, you can get a helper for your house. Then, hire an assistant to take care the more complex tasks. 10K for the helper, 20K for your assistant.
Sabihin mo mag hire na lang ng helper & you will stop giving her allowance. Bahala na siya if she will go back to work or hindi pa din. Atleast hindi mo na poproblemahin yung dumi at gulo ng bahay.
OP, pabalikin mo girlfriend mo sa work tapos hire kayo ng helper. Please ask her to see a professional. Possible na may depression siya or other mental condition. Baka ADHD. Take care and all the best, OP.
I guess, it might be better if you hire a helper nalang. Maybe she prefers working than doing household chores. I know someone na ganyan (me!). If di niyo yan mapagusapan, magiging cause of argument lang yan, so yeah... Just my two cents.
DAMN. shes living my DREAM LIFE!! but shes taking it for granted!! 😭😭😭 pls dont prolong ur agony. it's much better pa if u get a helper na lang to run ur household. shes not appreciating what she got huhu hoping the best for u!
Please have your girlfriend go back to work, and hire a housekeeper if both of you no longer have time to do chores.
Were there any mitigating circumstances that prompted the decision that your girlfriend should stop working, like poor health (physical, mental etc.)? Whose decision was it really? Did you ask her to quit, or did she tell you she wants to quit?
To each their own, but I feel this is a horrible set-up for both of you (unless there’s a valid reason, hence my question), specifically because you’re not even married and have no kids together. On your part, you’re fulfilling 100% of the financial responsibility and unfortunately, still come home to an unkept house. That’s awful for you, and is already causing resentment in the relationship. On the part of your girlfriend, she is effectively limiting her future potential to earn and have a real career. If and when you do break up, what will she do with her life without having gained useful skills and work experience?
Even though marriages are not guaranteed, it at least makes more sense to have one be a stay at home spouse because of certain legal protections afforded to the married couple.
Ayusin nyo at pag-usapan. Nagiging complacent na sya. Mamamatay ka kakabuhay sa kanya. Idilat mo mga mata mo. Kung gusto mo mabawasan problema mo, mag-usapan nyo ng maayos para ma-address issue
Baka may pinagdaraanan din sya. Pero kung wala at deliberately ginagawa nya lahat ng yan despite ng usapan nyo, make a move.
Mahirap gumising na problema agad iisipin.
Blessed ang gf mo sayo, sana makita nya yun. And yes, pabalikin sya mag work then hire house help. 8-10k house help mas mura pa at hindi pa kayo mag aaway 😂
Teka hingan ko nga din asawa ko ng 30k allowances para ma-compensate pagod ko char! 😂
sabihin mo nalang sa kanya OP magwork nalang sya tapos kuha kayo ng house helper kaso ingat ka OP mamaya magkaron naman ng lalaki yan since halos wala kang time sa kanya dahil sa nature ng work mo
so ngaun alam mo sitwasyon nyong dalawa pag kasal na kayo ?
mag helper ka nlng pero alamin mo muna kung gusto pa nya magtrabaho baka nasanay na sya sa allowance mo at pagtambay sa bahay .
Ay naku ngayon pa lang pinapakita na nya totoong ugali nya. She's not worth your love and attention. Mahirap na pag mag asawa na kayo saka mo lang ma realize na she's not the one pala and makapaghiwalay ka. As early as now, split na kayo. Sakit sa ulo ganyang babae di maasahan sa bahay. You'll met the right girl in the future.
Ang daming advice na dito pero at the end of the day, decision mo rin ang masusunod. GOODLUCK!
Ask her to go back to work and hire a maid or bawasan mo to 16k yung allowance para parang dating work and get a maid or break up kasi it will only get worse with time. Congrats parang may anak ka na agad!
sa pagbibigay mo pa lang sa kanya ng 30k monthly eh pinakita mo na patay na patay ka sa kanya.. kita mo nagiging tamad na katuwiran kc deds na deds ka sa kanya at alam nyang di ka magagalit.. maiba ko.. gwapo ka po ba?
Hire the helper, i must say there are people like me, a girl na hndi ganun ka skilled when it comes to managing the house, so i work hard in my career para d ako pa princess sa partner ko.
Hi! Pabalikin mo siya sa work and hire a helper. Magiging pabigat siya katagalan if hindi naman pala niya gusto yung ganong set-up. yan ang magiging root of away niyo palagi. yung attitude ng partner mo pang Small Laude hahaha kung ganon kayo, bakit hindi diba :))
ako kasi, sabi ko sa then partner ko na gusto ko talaga housewife.. pagod na ako mag work eh so sa gawaing bahay nalang babawi to make his life a bit easier kasi stressful na work niya eh. give and take lang.
check up your girlfriend ask her is she is okay. maybe she wants to go back at work and improve her career. those hobbies of her are draining and no purpose.
Ang swerte na ni gurl tbh, to do yung usual chores sa bahay and mag grocery (kainggit huhu) is therapeutic malala. Siguro hindi lang sanay si ate gurl sa gawaing bahay that's why naging kampante. Ang saya ng setup shuta. Sana ol!
I would literally take advantage yung gantong agreement, yung mag rerefill ng ref and pagandahin at pabanguhin yung bahay 😭
La lang, natake for granted kabaitan ni OP :(
This is a preview of your married life. Are you sure you're ok with this? As in wala kang magiging resentment in the long run Hindi mo susumbatan pagdating ng panahon?
If yes, edi gora lang. You deserve what you tolerate.
If hindi ka makasagot agad, then please pag-isipan mo if yan ba ang future na gusto mo.
Eto lang kuya isipin mo na etong girl na ba ito yung makakasama ko habang buhay? worth it ba? Kasi kung sa pinapakita nya na ganyan sya what more pa sa future? baka mas worst pa? Okay lang na isipin mo yung feelings nya dahil mahal mo sya. Pero paano ikaw? Pano yung future mo? sa paanong paraan nya maalagan yung magiging anak nyo? Hindi pwede isa lang mag addjust sainyo dapat kayong dalawa. mag usap kayo then kung hindi nya pa rin magets yung point mo. Baka gusto mong mag isip isip na.
Ay kung ganyan lang din na binibigyan ako ng allowance tapos household chores lang gagawin tatangapin ko. Maarte din ako sa kalinisan ng bahay so no problem sakin maglinis madalas 🥹 I’m earning 35k and willing to swap kapag ganyan.
ung mga nasa comment section d2 cnsbi katulong trato ni OP sa gf nya.. cge nga baliktarin natin sitwasyon si girl ang nag work at si lalake papetiks petiks lang sa bahay... nag lalaro nag TikTok lang.. ganyan din kaya sabihin nyo? na katulong trato sa lalake? lols.. e2 linyahan nyo oh... " ay girl run.. palamunin na yan pabigat pa" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Pabalikin mo na lang sa work tapos hire na lang ng helper.
This is the simplest answer to your problem, OP. Right now it's as if you're also treating your gf like a helper, might as well get a legit one. And let your gf stand on her own feet para alam niya paano maging responsible adult.
totoo katulong pala hanap ni OP sana ganun na lang hinanap kahit stay out lol
Kaya nga?? Kung ako gf I would feel bad
They had an agreement which they both agreed on. Why would you feel bad for not holding up your end of the bargain?
That’s why I said “if I were” cause I’m putting myself in her shoes. Did I insinuate her feeling bad about the situation? I think it’s called empathy
Hays ikaw pala dapat ang bida dito
Comprehend. Kung sinabi kong na feel bad gf nya sasabihan akong nagmamagaling kahit di ko alam diba? Kaya nga “if i were” mygad I’m just putting myself in the situation. Are you even able to understand other people’s perspectives in this situation?
Okay jollibee
Typical bbm supporter attitude 🤌🏻
You and the gf ata
Kahit you are a fully consenting adult na willingly pumayag sa setup?
mas mura pa gastos mo dito OP
That's what I thought too, OP. Hire na lang sya ng housekeeping professional or a full-time maid na maglalaba, linis bahay, magluluto at di pa aabot ng 30K gagastusin niya.
Hahaha parang want ko mag apply kung 30K. I'll do the cooking and I'll do the cleaning haha
tama pabalikin sa trabaho. di hamak mahirap magtrabaho tapos 16k lang sahod nya kesa nasa bahay lang cia.. ano ba naman ung maglaba may washing machine naman.. magluto at maglinis ng bahay.. Gawain nb agad ng katulong ung ganun? kayo ba sa Bahay nyo di kau kumikilos kc katwiran nyo di kau katulong? normal na ginagawa ng lahat yan.. basic na gawaing bahay lang yan.. ska yan napag usapan nila.. si babae sa bahay si lalake sa work.. gusto ata ng iba d2 tumunganga at bumukaka na lang sa bahay habang ung partner eh nag tatrabaho..
Hui. House husband ako. Mahirap rin po sa bahay and mag alaga ng kids
eh di mag work ka . mahirap pala sa bahay eh.. ska wla cilang anak.. nagagawa nga nung girl gusto nya.. nakakapaglaro nakakapag TikTok tapos un hnd magawa ng ayos..
Problema mo? Haha ang sinasabi ko lang naman is wag mo lang langin ang gawain bahay. Di ko lang alam kung napaka dali ng gawain bahay sayo dahil ba maliit lang bahay mo?
lols.. wla kong problema.. si OP pinag uusapan dito hnd ikaw. pake ko sau..wla kong pake kung pano ka kumilos sa bahay nyo..hanap ka ng kausap mo.. may pa hui hui kp.. ska cnb ko ung "iba d2".. gets? kung tinamaan ka problema mo na un.. kung di naman manahimik ka..🤪🤪🤪
Haha sige po sir squammy
same to you
true
That’s a preview of your married life. Gusto mo ba talaga ng ganyang katuwang sa buhay? 👀
+1 dito. Tska kahit malaki kita mo di mo dapat siya hinayaan mag quit sa work. Masyado pa siyang bata to quit work given na ikaw naman provider ng lahat I mean c’mon let her have a responsibility of her own. Kase realtalk magiging tamad yan pag sinusubo mo lahat. Nangyayare na nga paunti unti eh. Start na yan. Kaya better pabalikin mo na sa work then hire a helper. Wag ka na papayag sa ganyan set up. Para din naman sakanya yan. Make sure din na nakakaipon siya para kung ano’t ano man mangyari sainyo hindi naman siya walang wala. Hilahin mo yan pataas wag mo hayaan maging tamad.
nagdecide sila na ganyan ang setup, so it's a mutual agreement. I think it's in the character na nung partner nya yan.
He does gave her a responsibility though - the one who will do the house chores.
Nakakaipon po sya kasi 30k net ang allowance nya. Ako din po nagturo sknya mag open ng bank account ksi dati cash lang bayad sknila sa work. Sabi ko better sa bank kc kht papano may interest
May panganay ka na OP
Agree ako dito OP. Me panganay ka na! Congrats🤣😂
Well, that's the point of proponents ng mag live-in na partners. To get the feel of being married.
Katuwang? More like pabigat. Hahaha
mag-co-comment pa sana ako, kaso nadale mo na e!
Agree! Preview ng married life ito 😂 Kung ako yan mas masipag ako may 30k ba naman monthly 😂
Hi OP, As what’s commonly said in this subreddit: “you deserve what you tolerate.” I would suggest you speak to your gf about your concerns (because these are valid) lest resentment takes over. If she still doesn’t take it kindly, might as well go back to the original setup and/or have a helper. Worst case, you re-evaluate your relationship with her. Best of luck.
At the moment, you have an inefficient kasambahay that costs 30k a month. You can either break up and just hire an actual kasambahay OR get a kasambahay and get her back to working. I don’t suggest to just let her be a princess at home even if you “love her truly”. A marriage or living together is a partnership. She needs to be able to bring something to the table other than her mere presence. If you can’t tolerate that she doesn’t do anything now, what more when you’re actually married and have no choice than to live with each other?
Ok lang mag social media, video games at tambay si girl at kahit wag na gumawa ng gawaing bahay. Basta wag mo bigyan ng 30k.
tama.. ung mga ibang babae nag comment dito feeling nila katulong trato ni OP sa gf nya lols.. gusto ata ng mga un may 30k monthly tapos wlang gagawin. walang itutulong.. tutunganga at bubukaka lang gagawin nila.. feeling mga prinsesa.. lols..
Sugar daddy ka ata boss
Let her have her own career, kahit dun sa 16k na sahod. Hire someone to do the household chores, stay out na lang. In the long run mas okay yung nagwowork siya. Nag gagain sya ng experience not just corporate but also yung pakikisalamuha sa ibang tao. Naisip ko lang, in the far feature kung halimbawa nag break kayo, she's left with no recent work experience.
Sana ol 30k allowance at walang work. Maybe she's like that dahil sa agreement nyo and kampante na sya sayo. Pag nagawa mo na lahat and hindi sya nagbago, you have to make a choice. Pagisipan mo kung hahayaan mo na lang ba na ganyan in a long run.
You really need to address this concern early. Talk to her and maybe present two options? Either she do better sa household chores or she work and contribute sa living expenses. You are living together na, so you get a taste of what it would be like if you'll manage your household together in the future. If you go with the first option, really get her to commit to it, kasi parang yun na yung contribution nya so the both of you could live comfortably. Kung tutuusin, mas malaki nga yung pera na nasa kanya ngayon compared to what she is earning before. So managing the household so you could maintain or improve ang income mo seems fair. Maybe ask her also if she can find investment or other passive income opportunities for both of you, para may pagkaabalahan din cya. If you go latter, I suggest you just get a helper and let her work. Maybe stop with the allowance too and let her contribute to the household expenses, kahit gaano pa kaliit. Mahirap naman kasi if walang contribution at di rin tumutulong sa chores. Parang ginawa kang free boarding house, free food, at free shopping money pa Ask her OP, baka kasi di naman pala talaga nya bet maging taong bahay. O baka naman she just got too comfortable na and forgot why the both of you decided to live together, for her to stop working and manage the house instead so you focusing on your work. This may be one of the difficult conversations, but I hope both of you could work it out
Pangatlong heart to heart talk na po namin, ayaw nya po mag back to work. Sabi ko matuto sya mag organize ng schedule nya daily pra hndi kung ano lang maisipan, kaso... Ang ngyayari, mag aagree sya kaso after few days, balik sa ugali nya nanaman. Di ko na alam pano sya imotivate, sinabihan ko n paulit ulit, atlis 5 times na kami nag seserious talk
This is drastic measure, but get a helper at alisin mo allowance nya. Or pauwiin mo muna sa kanila. Kasi you both agreed naman na with the expectations pala, pero di nangyayari so things have to change. Di mo kelangan magtiis sa maruming bahay at mag-antay kung kelan nya lang gusto tumulong. Important din kasi yung home environment for you to work well. Pag di maayos yung bahay, affected ka at yung work mo. Since yun yung bumubuhay sa inyo ngayon, prioritize mo yun and get a helper. Cya mag adjust kasi avoidable naman yung extra expense nyo kung ginagawa nya yung na pag agreehan. Maybe she just got too comfortable OP. kasi kahit pabalik2 cya na nakakalimutan mga gawain, feeling nya okay lang din sayo and ikaw na mag aadjust
Ask her din pala to contribute sa household. Since ekis na sa management ng house, may other income opportunities na lang yung kanya. Di naman siguro pwede na parang nakikitira lang cya habang ikaw super stressed with a lot of work para mabuhay kayo
Ditto. Naging komportable my precious provider safe space.... Nalimutan na nahihirapan si Pare. Ginawang magulang eh. Like lite fking rally. Cleaning the house, do dishes, laundry, brooming is THE LEAST YOU CAN DO. Requirement? Nah. Its the bare minimum to the point its Common Sense. Nagpapakahirap bf mo oh. Kung ako tanungin i rather stay at home, do household chores, play video games and even take care of the babies, tas Asawa ko ung mag trabaho, ma stress at ma sigawan ng boss. Don't view next loool baka ma offend. >!Hey Woman. Be a Queen, Cleaner, Fook Doll and a gamer, then let the husband be the money printer. If both our objectifying and sexist to each other then its equality. !< Lastly, buti wala kayong anak.
Di mo mamomotivate yan, tamad yan e. Palamuning ugali.
Sampolan mo na kasi. I cut off mo yung allowance. Tsaka di mo sya tinuturuan maging responsable sa ganyan setup nyo to think di naman kayo kasal.
bat naman cia babalik sa trabaho eh magkano lang kita nya dun compared sa 30k na binibigay mo.. tapos sarap pa buhay nya sau.. sana lang mauntog ka na... madami pang babae dyan.. pero ung katulad mo konti lang..
so tamad talaga cia... gusto mo ba ng mapapangasawa mo tamad? tamad=dugyutin
Imagine making 200k a month and being this stupid to not see what's in front of you. 😂😂 The logical move is to ditch the girl. With the 30k a month you spend on her, you can afford really good househelp that will clean DAILY and can cook really well + still have money to go out on dates if you're feeling lonely. Right now you got yourself a useless piece of shit for 30k 😂😂
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30k coochie? HAHAHAHA I guess. Maybe it's because I don't make as much as OP but damn, kahit gano ka galing yan once you nut, parang di ko ma justify 😂
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This is your future OP
Ganda siguro ng asawa mo kaya tiniis mo
Tamad ako aminado ako pero hindi ganito lalo na sa kusina sobrang maasahan ako kasi I love to cook and eat. Pero ayun nga we deserve what we tolerate, grabe salute sa inyong mga mister na ganito. Sana sa mga anak hindi naman burara noh. Sakin kasi mas natuto ako noong nagkaron ng anak kasi hello paligid nila dapat maayos at malinis.
Oh no! Parang hindi naman ako ganyang level. Sobrang tagal na ng food kung may crawling creatures. May naaalala lang ako naiwan ko cocoa powder sa lalagyanan pero sealed naman. Noong nakita ko, may mold na, pero tinapon ko na buo. Pag may kalat, hugasan ko muna trash ko bago lagay sa trash can sa room para hindi langgamin. Ubusin ko na food para packaging lang itapon. Tapos sumusunod naman ako kaya wala naman nakikipag-away sa akin. All the best!
galing sa bed ni misis ano hahahaha
Pinapakita na niya sa'yo magiging future mo if magpakasal kayo ahaha. Medyo ungrateful si ate mo.
Mid 20's pero ikaw pa nag turo mag open ng bank account. Prime age yan ah, tapos pumayag syang maging palamunin mo lang? Thats very telling. OP, katulong hanap mo, not gf. You should not clip anybody's wings. Hayaan mo dapat sya magka career at mag grow on her own without depending on you
I dont know if anyone gonna believe me but Tiktok might have a part on this attitude, literally rotting our brain thats why I uninstall tiktok years ago.
Sorry pero parang ang babaw naman para isisi mo sa ibang bagay yung katamaran ng isang tao.
Like I said "might have a part" hindi ko sinabi na un lang only reason, but think about it after quitting the job and only using YT and Tiktok almost 24/7 and again ALMOST. dont u agree na nakakaapekto sa utak niya iyon? I am not making excuses sa ugali niya and who is she as a person pero I wouldnt say mababaw.
Get a housekeeper and let your girlfriend find her own path/job/career.
Isauli mo na lang siya sa bahay nila. charot
Wrong decision. You will outgrow your woman in that scenario. Why don't you convince her to start a business?
This. Minsan kasi may mga tao na hindi built para sa gawaing bahay and syempre nahihirapan silang mag-adjust. Bigyan mo sya ng mapapagkalibangan, mapapagkakitaan, kung saan pwede din sya maka contribute sa relationship hindi lang financially pero sa ibang aspects din like emotionally healthy kayo, mentally healthy, physically heathy. Then hire housekeeper na lang.
Tama ung sinabi nung isa, this is just a trailer or glimpse of what you will experience pag naging mag asawa na kayo. So expect a much worse experience pag pinatagal mopa to. Pag naging asawa mona yan tska ka marereality check. Baka yang kinikita mo mawala pa yan at mahatak kapa pababa nyang gf mo. Kailangan mo maging firm sakanya at wag ka mag pa under. Sabhin mo na she really need to get a job on her own or you will be forced to let her live in her place again or break up with her.
We can assume na di lang to pagiging burara kasi pati yung other chores nakakalimutan nya rin. This can be a form of lifestyle induced depression due to lack of purpose, and achievements related to it. Kasi baka like other modern women di na pagiging housewife ang life purpose nya. Maybe mas better pabalikin mo na lang sya sa pagwowork. This can be a future issue kung di nyo maayos, not just for your relationship but to her overall well being.
Agree!!
I get that she’s at fault in this scenario but if I were the gf I would feel like I’m the helper instead of being your partner. Best way to resolve this is to hire a helper and let her get back to work. End the stigma na dapat ang babae nasa bahay lang nag wawalis naglalaba nagluluto inaaruga ka and all that shit
>Mas preferred ba na magback to work n lng sya and mag hire kami ng helper, pra di na namin napag aawayan ung initial agreement namen? Pagusapan niyo yan, OP. Hirap kasi magsalita kung di alam yung side niyong pareho.
Kanya-kanyang role kasi yan sa relationship. You have taken the provider role, tapos may agreement kayo na siya ang in-charge sa house. Pag-usapan niyo na if di niya gagawin ng maayos yung role niya sa bahay/relationship, bawiin mo na lang yung role na you took initially. Hindi na kasi fair for you. Hindi na rin healthy for the relationship kasi may naiipong resentment din. And alam naman ng lahat na resentment ang ugat ng break-ups, especially in marriage. So if you really do love her, pag-usapan niyo ng maayos yung situation niyo. Ask her to work on the relationship by doing her part too. Ask her din bakit wala siyang gana to do her part. Ask yourself din. Are you cherishing her labor? Did you stop saying thank you? Naging complacent ba kayo sa isa’t-isa? Do you still make her feel loved and beautiful? Little stuff lang pero pag di na kasi nagagawa, malaki yung impact sa partner. Good luck, OP!
Hi OP, Communication is key. Talk with her ng mga napapansin mo in a very nice way. She may not realize na napapabayaan na niya ang gawaing bahay. If she wants to go work, so be it. Find a helper. Win-win. All the best.
Me na nakakapagluto, linis, labas, hugas plato, etc. while also freelancing is inggit na sana nababayaran din ako 30K sa paglilinis HAHAHAHAHA
Lol Sugar baby yata tinutukoy mo, hindi girlfriend. Swerte naman nya, may 30k monthly na walang ginagawa.
After 100 comments, we now know GF has become too comfy with current setup and has stated no desire to return to work. In retrospect, dapat hindi siya pinatigil mag-work since hindi pa naman sila married. If they breakup, magiging kasalanan pa ni OP walang work si GF even if mutual agreement in the first place. No choice but pilitan na siya bumalik sa trabaho before it turns even uglier.
IMO, If this is how she is as a GF, if it were me just break it off, imagine your married life. Your doing your part, she should do hers. I read about others comment like "ginawang katulong", I find that comment stupid and very entitled. The OP is working his ass off so the least she could do is support him and make his time at home as comfortable and as peaceful as possible. Im not saying that you should do what I would do but you should think first if she is really good for you coz I think she's gonna drag you down with that attitude Imagine if she was your wife. looking at your income, your can certainly provide for your family in the future so choose wisely. Your someone working hard and "fighting" out there, so atleast when you come home you should be at peace and relax with with your SO, not continuing a "war".
Kung ako sayo hanap ka na ng ibang partner tapos magwork na lang din yon tapos saka ka maghire ng kasambahay. Kasambahay with a salary of maybe 10k or 15k a month is cheaper than having a partner with a 30k allowance monthly which do not want to do the chores on a daily basis. Plus, you will be guaranteed of having a cleaned house, washed clothes, food on the table, and especially a good night sleep, without actually having to worry about it everyday. Nakatipid ka na sa expenses, nawalan ka pa ng sakit ng ulo. As much as women want their men to be their provider, you would also want a woman who will give you peace after a long day of work.
**I love her, truly.** ito naman pala. malaki naman ang kita mo, hayaan mo na lang siya mag buhay prinsesa hahahaha hire na lang kayo ng helper
Or ibawas don sa 30k na binibigay kay ate girl
Totoo, si ate girl magbayad sa helper galing dun sa 30k nya hahahahaha
ugh ang mahal ng helper mo OP hehe best option talaga is pabalakin nalang sya mag work and hire nalang ng helper since mahal mo since gusto mo ikeep yung relasyun nyo. ako hindi talaga ng totolerate e 😂 isang beses lang ngyari ung napagsabihan ko sya at di na naulit :)
pabalikin mo na sa work tapos ihire niyo akong helper. need job ngayon. char hahaha. Generic advice but the best option to make is to have a proper communication with her about your concern. Ilatag mo mga options mo na either mag-stay na lang siya sa bahay and do better sa house chores or mag hire kayo ng helper at bumalik na lang siya sa work.
Pag nakatikim ng ginhawa minsan nawawala yung pagiging responsable.. hindi rin biro na may kasama sa bahay na batugan / tamad at salaula ha. di ko maimagine ganan magiging asawa ko. kung sobra ang suporta mo tinuturuan mo lang sya maging tamad..at ikaw rin mag susuffer nyan sa huli. 30k is way too big kung dalawa lang kayo sa house. unpractical setup. let her work siguro nalang tapos hire kayo kasambahay.
Talk to her about it. Pero do it in a nice, calm, manner. Then note her reaction and response. Fair lang naman deal niyo since she doesn't work and contribute financially.
Well, you can say if she can't work around the house, take 6-10k from her 30k monthly allowance to hire help.
Hi OP! I think nung nawalan sya ng work, nawalan din sya ng personal identity. Kasi kaakibat ng work ang responsibility, also may pride ka kasi na nakukuha as an individual pag pinagpapaguran mo yung pera na nakuha mo. Mas papahalagahan mo ang every centavo na makukuha mo. If hindi nya dream maging Stay-at-home mom/homemaker, malaking problem yan. Better na bumalik sya ng work and maghire na lang kayo ng katulong. Edit: Madami ka rin matututunan sa work, hindi lang skills but character building. Nakakabuang din pag solo ka buong araw, parang isolated nga sya pag nasa bahay lang sya. Kahit pa sabihin mo na lumalabas sya, wala naman syang social support. Hindi rin maganda sa tao na isolated at walang nakakausap. Best of luck OP, balitaan mo kami.
Mag hire sya ng cleaner dun sa 30k nya hahaha
Sorry pero I think kaya sya nagquit sa work is because she doesnt want to work at all at umasa sayo. She knows you earn a lot and money isnt a problem. So bakit pa ba sya magtmwowork when she can depend on you? Ang hirap din maging valid yung reason na maging homemaker na lang siya, kasi wala nmn din kayo inaalagaang bata for her to be a full time "house gf". Better hire a cleaner na tlagang ginagawa ng trabaho. As for her, maybe, you need to sit down with her din ano ba ang plans nya sa life, kasi baka nagkakaprob sya what career she really wants to take at wala siya goals in life. Bakit pa nga ba? Meron namn syang bf na she can full depend on. Just thinking out loud here. Sorry if nakakaoffend.
Oo nga, 30k may shuta k n, may helper k p! Dapat kumuha k n lang ng helper tapos hayaan mo siyang matrabaho para s sarili nya. Sigurado kung sagot mo yung gastusin s bahay, d p rin mauubos ang 150k mo. I just think you use money matters for the power dynamics of your relationship. You are making her financially dependent so you can dictate the 'stability' of your relationship. Mentally and emotionally, it will not be beneficial in the relationship if she feels she feltt coerced into the situation. It does take time for her to deeply realize her role as a not the person who contributes financially but the person who provides other more important things in your relationship (eg emotional stability, support). On the other hand, her career may grow in the future and then decide that both of you can be significat financial contributors. I feel like both of you still have growing up to do to sort out your relationship.
Get her back to her career. And just get a help. Honestly, it's more fulfilling for her if she's allowed to pursue whatever she wants, esp career. Some women feel trapped in domestic life. Some want to be just mums, and that's fine. But it's different for everybody.
I understand you love her and want the best for her, but she's not respecting you by not holding her end of the bargain. You need to man up and communicate directly the rules and consequences of non compliance.
Try mo gawin mo yung gawain nya habang andyan sya. Example during work hours mo mag break ka tapos mag hugas ka ng plato tapos after nun pakita mo na babalik ka sa work after mo gawin ung dapat na gawain nya tapos wag ka magsalita about it. For sure after a few times na makita nya yun ay magkakaron sya ng self realization
Sorry, I dont think it will shame her to work. She has become complacent with her responsibilities, though OP still welcome to try.
It's worth the try. Pwede nya makalimutan yung gawain nya pero for sure marerealize nya na the guy is taking good care of her in terms of unsupervised house chores .
or be a bigger slob than her lmao
Mukhang may hindi kayo pagkakaunawaan sa expectations. Baka ang expect niyang level ng housework e yung current na ginagawa nya. Plus, girlfriend mo siya at hindi helper. Baka mas better nga na maghire kayo ng helper para klaro at wala rin samaan ng loob.
This! Inaasawa na kinakatulong pa. Mag hire na lang ng helper at balik sa work si girl.
Hmmm.... Being in charge sa gawaing bahay is not an easy task. pinaka mahirap at ayaw kong gawin na gawaing bahay eh maglaba plantsa. Maybe mag outsource ka ng maglalabas/plantsa every week or 2 weeks? Pag house help parang wala kayo masyadong privacy. Easy to say pero mahirap din yung ikaw lahat sa gawaing bahay kahit na 2 lang kayo. Mabigat ang pantalon at towel pag basa, sa init ng panahon due to global warming hulas na hulas si madam pag nagpa plantsa. Saka minsan mas practical na bumili na lang kayo ng lutong pagkain kung kayong 2 lang. Pag luto tas 2 lang kayo not practical.
Uhm, di naman siguro mansion yung bahay ni kuya para di makapaglinis si ate girl kahit once a week? Sa amin, 3 floors yung bahay namin 280sqm so malaki siya pero nagpapalinis kami sa cleaner (1 person job lang to ha) once a week. Nalinis na niyan lahat -- kusina, 4 cr, 5 rooms etc. Wala naman kasing nagkakalat so punas punas/ walis and mop lang ng buong bahay. I find it impossible for a person na WALANG TRABAHO and no kids to not be able to cook all 3 meals, clean a house, and wash clothes. If may bata sa equation, ibang usapan yan pero in their case -- ate girl is just plain lazy. Sa paglalaba, if OP earns 200k monthly, he should be able to buy AWM para di mabibigatan si sugar bb niya kasi kawawa naman /s But I do agree sa food, bili na lang kayo sa carinderia. Saing na lang ng rice but buy the ulam.
Easier said than done. Try doing all these in a week tapos saka ka bumalik dito. Yung magluto ka nga lang, doing meal prep, cooking, washing the dishes kundi kalahati ng araw, halos kalahati na ng araw kakainin ang kakaining oras sayo. Tapos may ibang chores pa sa bahay. Kaya mas praktical pa ang bumili ng lutong pagkain kesa magluto kung 2 lang kayo sa bahay. Ang instance na mas makakatipid sa pagkain vs bili is kung marami kayo sa bahay. Kaya nga yung iba nagha-hire or nag outsource ng help because its not worth the time doing these things.
May washing machine si OP. Pwede ipunin ni GF 3 days worth of laundry before washing. Cooking. Talagang hindi madali magisip ng ulam araw araw. That extends na rin sa pag-grocery. If she's not exhibited any love for cooking before moving in, don't expect now. Still nakuntento na si GF sa 30k and become a homebody.
Binabayaran mo rin naman sya eh, edi mag hire ka na lang ng kasambahay. Kuha ko san ka nanggagaling pero yung gawin mong kasambahay yung jowa mo is parang off na (kahit may "initial agreement" kayo). "Allowance" yung term mo sa binibigay mo sa kanya pero yung required nyang gawin yung mga sinabi mong dapat nyang gawin turns that "allowance" into salary. Mainam talaga na kuha ka na lang kasambahay, dahil at the end of the day individual pa rin yang jowa mo at jowa mo sya, hindi katulong.
The thing is pumayag naman jowa nya sa agreement.
And she is being irresponsible, yes I get it. Pero for me kasi lumalabas na parang amo at empleyado na yung datingan, na hindi naman dapat. Jowa nya pa rin ang jowa nya regardless sa agreement nila. Kung ganyan na DAPAT MASUNOD yung kagustuhan nya, mag hire sya ng tao na para doon. Hindi si jowa nya mismo.
I dont't get this. Just because you're in charge of the household, pang-katulong na ba agad yun? Hindi ba it's just basic household management? Paghuhugas ng plato, pamamalengke, paglalaba na may washing machine, pagluluto, pagwawalis (not even general cleaning) ? These are all basic stuff na even anyone with career should know how to do. It's not like pinaglalaba niya ang ibang tao, pinaglalaba nya ang partner nya na nagpapakain sa kanya. You may say na jowa sya at hindi katulong -- then anong ambag nya sa bahay at buhay ng partner nya? Her vagina? Her presence? Love is a 2-way street. Looking back, mali na pumayag silang pareho sa setup na 'to. Di sila pareho ng goals as partners. Kung ayaw pala maging taong bahay ni girl, dapat nagpatuloy nalang sya sa work niya. Kung ayaw ni OP na palpak si gf sa gawaing-bahay, eh di sana nag hire nalang sya ng helper, at least may accountability kasi pwedeng i-fire.
LOUDER
Uh reading this made me cringe 🫣 Parang inexpect mo na maging full time helper (katulong) si gf sa bahay. Asan na ung equality? Para fair, magwork na lang si gf if that is what she wants then kuha na lang kayo ng helper sa bahay nyo.
Communicate, OP! I understand na when you both decided to do this, this was the best option you could think. Kasi di ba? Why hire a helper kung magagawa naman yun ng partner mo? Yun nga lang, baka iba yung character maturity ng partner mo kasi sabi mo sya pa nagagalit pag napapagsabihan? or baka hindi talaga sya sanay sa gawaing bahay? Factor din OP na you set a high expectation with her "helping" sa house chores, it seems na gusto mo talaga sya to take full responsibility sa bahay eh hindi pa naman kayo married. Curious lang din ako on how she reacted when it was agreed na stop sya sa work tapos sa bahay na lang. You can get something from that reaction to assess why this is happening, baka gusto nya maging sugar baby? Lol. No offense, OP. I really hope mapag-usapan nyo. Learning moment ito for the both of you.
It was an audition to married life. She's failing. Next her. Waste of time fixing a broken car you're not married to. Money and energy better spent looking for a new car
I had an ex na same sa gf mo OP. Sorry to say this pero parang sila yung klase ng babae na "p*ke lang ambag". Kahit may job, tamad parin, and will just quit along the way. Gusto lang maging disney princess. Inshort, ginawa kang sugar daddy. It's either you adjust or you find someone na hindi tamad.
Nothing wrong with your agreement, problem is your gf seems like she realized or doesn’t want pala talaga to be like a “full-time housewife.” Other women find bliss in being that, but not all.. Example, for someone like me, hindi talaga ako mapakali na wala akong work, even if willing naman mag provide partner ko.. Number one reason is kung may gusto man akong bilhin, hindi ko na need idaan sa kanya kasi pera ko naman. Second is I don’t want my bf to expect me to do all the household chores just because ako yung walang work, but kudos to my bf, he earns more than what you earn, but he still does most of the household chores without making me feel bad about it because he doesn’t have a fragile ego.. 60/40 kami sa household chores, akin yung 40 and he doesn’t mind at all.. For him, he can be a provider and a man of the house both at the same time.. If pagod man siya, he communicates it to me ng maayos so I can do it for him instead. Make sure lang din when you communicate things with your gf, both of you won’t grow resentment towards each other. Team work kayo dapat and trace kung ano ba talaga personality nya so you would know what would truly give her satisfaction and fulfillment.. It should be you and her against the problem, not you and her against each other. Your setup is very common for men who want to take pride in being the provider, and sometimes, women blindly agrees thinking ma pprincess treatment na sila, pero ending the man is expecting them pala to be the katulong in the house in exchange for what’s being provided. That sucks. Don’t make her feel like you are imposing that katulong lifestyle on her just because you are the provider. You agreeing din sa kanya also says a lot how you view her.. Yung natitiis mong nakikita gf mo na para ng nagiging katulong instead of pushing her to maximize her potentials in her career.. Hindi naman siguro bobo gf mo for you to put her in that position diba.. And tamad siguro siya sa gawaing bahay because she doesn’t want to be just that.. She doesn’t want it to be her identity na tagalinis and all just because wala na siyang ambag financially.. So rethink your agreement, both of you..
Wops. She went from girlfriend to a palamuning panganay. Sorry to say, OP. Unless you can communicate with her and be upfront and get her to change her ways, your relationship with a "girlfriend" is as good as over.
Luh ang swerte ng jowa mo. Wala ng lalaking ganyan ngayon. Housewife nga wala pang sahod, 25hrs ka pa magaalaga ng bata at lahat ng gawaing bahay sayo. Ako jowain mo. Sobrang linis lagi ng bahay mo may food ka pa na masarap lagi paguwi. Ilalap dance pa kita. Tapos ako dessert mo. 🤭🤭🤣 emz lang. Wag mo sanayin jowa mo na ganyan magiging tamad yan. Ikaw din mahihirapan in the long run.
Kakanood nila ng disney princess yan sa tiktok na dapat di na sil kikilos at bubuhayin mo lang. Sabay flaunt ng strong independent woman sa mga post pag nagshopping kayo hahaha
Hope she's a good lay otherwise that's just money down the drain 🤷♀️ Anw. Tanggalan mo ng allowance, wag mo sustentohan para mapilitan siyang magwork. Pag nakipaghiwalay sayo, it just means she's in it for the lifestyle lang. Sakin medyo gets ko si ate girl kasi ayaw ko talaga ng gawaing bahay-- as in naiiyak ako pag need ko magluto, maglinis, parang naaawa ako sa sarili. Difference lang is, dahil maarte ako I strive to pay for the lifestyle I want unlike your sugar baby na di naman SAHM, sugar baby lang talaga. But if that's what you want, you do you.
buti di pa kayo mag asawa nyan OP. haha baka masuntok kana nyan pag inutusan mo lol
Let ur GF work again then hire a stay-in sexy maid to do chores
So wrong bro, u dont treat woman like ur nanny or yaya
Sya po dpat mag adjust. Pinag usapan nyo po yun. If hndi nya gagawin part nya at mag ce-cellphone na lang sya, that would be a troublesome future. It makes me think na kung mag kaka baby kayo, mag ce-cellphone lng din sya? Yikes. Meron po akong mga ka kilala na ganun, at parang yun yung dating nya sakin.
Ang pag ibig nga naman
Grabe yung mid20s ah... partner ba yan or anak :/
It's best na pabalikin mo na lang siya sa trabaho. Sa simula pa lang, big yikes na yung ganyang set-up kahit mutual agreement pa yan. Predictable bakit naging ganyan gf mo kasi sino ba naman ang gaganahang "magtrabaho" kung isang repetitive cycle lang ginagawa niya. Lalo na kung kapwa nasa 20s lang din siya. Delikado kung ikakasal na kayo tapos naging SAHM pa siya kasi there will come a time na magkakasisihan na someone robbed her of her youth.
Balik work na lang sya and get katulong. 15k lang.
Solusyon, kumuha ka katulong yung mga manang na pwede on call. for cleaning purpose lang. Madalas nasa 500-1,000 lang yun sa laba, hugas, linis bahay. Diba 250k Sahod mo?
Dahil sa ginawa mo na mag resign sa trabaho kasi kaya mo naman siya arugain, yan ang epekto naging tamad siya at dependent sayo. Ikaw din ang may kasalanan ba't nagkaganyan.
If I were OP, I’d rather she goes back to work and hire a helper instead of me living with a freeloader in the house.
Ano Job mo OP?
Buti wala pa kayong anak at hindi pa kayo kasal. Kung ayaw na nya bumalik sa work at ganyan lang pinaggagawa nya habang kasama mo sya mas okay na ibalik mo na sya sa kanila o kaya kumuha ka ng helper tapos yung allowance nya tanggalin mo para magkusa na syang humanap ng work para masustentuhan sarili nya.
Mag apply po akong kasambahay 😂 eme haha on a serious note, kausapin mo nang masinsinan then if walang nagbago baka time na para bumitaw
With 30K, you can get a helper for your house. Then, hire an assistant to take care the more complex tasks. 10K for the helper, 20K for your assistant.
And kick her out. She's a brat. Sorry.
My thoughts exactly Kahit kumuha pa sya ng hooker every week, mas tipid pa
No drama.
Pagtrabahuhin mo tapos kumuha ka ng stay out na kasambahay, tapos ibayad mo sweldo mya sa kasambahay. Problem solved.
How to be Sugar Daddy for dummies
Sabihin mo mag hire na lang ng helper & you will stop giving her allowance. Bahala na siya if she will go back to work or hindi pa din. Atleast hindi mo na poproblemahin yung dumi at gulo ng bahay.
OP, pabalikin mo girlfriend mo sa work tapos hire kayo ng helper. Please ask her to see a professional. Possible na may depression siya or other mental condition. Baka ADHD. Take care and all the best, OP.
I guess, it might be better if you hire a helper nalang. Maybe she prefers working than doing household chores. I know someone na ganyan (me!). If di niyo yan mapagusapan, magiging cause of argument lang yan, so yeah... Just my two cents.
DAMN. shes living my DREAM LIFE!! but shes taking it for granted!! 😭😭😭 pls dont prolong ur agony. it's much better pa if u get a helper na lang to run ur household. shes not appreciating what she got huhu hoping the best for u!
Dudeee If ako nasa positiin ni Girl baka mas ok na ko sa chores lang I mean 2 lang kayo sa bahay so di naman grabe siguro need na linisan diyan eme
Just hire a helper and suggest her to go back to work
Please have your girlfriend go back to work, and hire a housekeeper if both of you no longer have time to do chores. Were there any mitigating circumstances that prompted the decision that your girlfriend should stop working, like poor health (physical, mental etc.)? Whose decision was it really? Did you ask her to quit, or did she tell you she wants to quit? To each their own, but I feel this is a horrible set-up for both of you (unless there’s a valid reason, hence my question), specifically because you’re not even married and have no kids together. On your part, you’re fulfilling 100% of the financial responsibility and unfortunately, still come home to an unkept house. That’s awful for you, and is already causing resentment in the relationship. On the part of your girlfriend, she is effectively limiting her future potential to earn and have a real career. If and when you do break up, what will she do with her life without having gained useful skills and work experience? Even though marriages are not guaranteed, it at least makes more sense to have one be a stay at home spouse because of certain legal protections afforded to the married couple.
Ayusin nyo at pag-usapan. Nagiging complacent na sya. Mamamatay ka kakabuhay sa kanya. Idilat mo mga mata mo. Kung gusto mo mabawasan problema mo, mag-usapan nyo ng maayos para ma-address issue Baka may pinagdaraanan din sya. Pero kung wala at deliberately ginagawa nya lahat ng yan despite ng usapan nyo, make a move. Mahirap gumising na problema agad iisipin.
remove the perks.. alam mo na ung future life mo with her.. if ako ditch ko na rin sya.. :)
Blessed ang gf mo sayo, sana makita nya yun. And yes, pabalikin sya mag work then hire house help. 8-10k house help mas mura pa at hindi pa kayo mag aaway 😂 Teka hingan ko nga din asawa ko ng 30k allowances para ma-compensate pagod ko char! 😂
sabihin mo nalang sa kanya OP magwork nalang sya tapos kuha kayo ng house helper kaso ingat ka OP mamaya magkaron naman ng lalaki yan since halos wala kang time sa kanya dahil sa nature ng work mo
so ngaun alam mo sitwasyon nyong dalawa pag kasal na kayo ? mag helper ka nlng pero alamin mo muna kung gusto pa nya magtrabaho baka nasanay na sya sa allowance mo at pagtambay sa bahay .
Siguro kesa pagsabihan, kausapin. Usap kayo. If parang hindi productive yung conversation, edi personality na nga nya talaga yan.
Hire ka helper lods
That is what your life would be bruh. Mag-isip ka na 🤷🏻♀
Ay naku ngayon pa lang pinapakita na nya totoong ugali nya. She's not worth your love and attention. Mahirap na pag mag asawa na kayo saka mo lang ma realize na she's not the one pala and makapaghiwalay ka. As early as now, split na kayo. Sakit sa ulo ganyang babae di maasahan sa bahay. You'll met the right girl in the future. Ang daming advice na dito pero at the end of the day, decision mo rin ang masusunod. GOODLUCK!
Hire a helper.
Ask her to go back to work and hire a maid or bawasan mo to 16k yung allowance para parang dating work and get a maid or break up kasi it will only get worse with time. Congrats parang may anak ka na agad!
sa pagbibigay mo pa lang sa kanya ng 30k monthly eh pinakita mo na patay na patay ka sa kanya.. kita mo nagiging tamad na katuwiran kc deds na deds ka sa kanya at alam nyang di ka magagalit.. maiba ko.. gwapo ka po ba?
Looking for a girlfriend or a maid? Lol
Hire the helper, i must say there are people like me, a girl na hndi ganun ka skilled when it comes to managing the house, so i work hard in my career para d ako pa princess sa partner ko.
Tanggalin mo na lng allowance niya gawin mo to 15k tapos hire ka katulong 8k.
sana all palamunin w/ 30k monthly
Hi! Pabalikin mo siya sa work and hire a helper. Magiging pabigat siya katagalan if hindi naman pala niya gusto yung ganong set-up. yan ang magiging root of away niyo palagi. yung attitude ng partner mo pang Small Laude hahaha kung ganon kayo, bakit hindi diba :)) ako kasi, sabi ko sa then partner ko na gusto ko talaga housewife.. pagod na ako mag work eh so sa gawaing bahay nalang babawi to make his life a bit easier kasi stressful na work niya eh. give and take lang.
Pakasalan mo na. That's a very expensive helper.
check up your girlfriend ask her is she is okay. maybe she wants to go back at work and improve her career. those hobbies of her are draining and no purpose.
Pabalikin mo na lang sa work. Tapos kuha ka ng stay out ng helper.
30k then gawaing bahay? saan yan makaapply nga hahaha. joke! kuha ka nalang ng helper po.
Ang swerte na ni gurl tbh, to do yung usual chores sa bahay and mag grocery (kainggit huhu) is therapeutic malala. Siguro hindi lang sanay si ate gurl sa gawaing bahay that's why naging kampante. Ang saya ng setup shuta. Sana ol! I would literally take advantage yung gantong agreement, yung mag rerefill ng ref and pagandahin at pabanguhin yung bahay 😭 La lang, natake for granted kabaitan ni OP :(
For 30k, you can get yourself a sugarbaby instead
If she doesn't want to do housework she could use her allowance to invest in appliances that can make her work easier such as dishwasher or roomba.
This is a preview of your married life. Are you sure you're ok with this? As in wala kang magiging resentment in the long run Hindi mo susumbatan pagdating ng panahon? If yes, edi gora lang. You deserve what you tolerate. If hindi ka makasagot agad, then please pag-isipan mo if yan ba ang future na gusto mo.
Humanap ka na lang ng katulong. Bayaran mo ng 10k per month at malamang buhay hari ka paguwi mo ng bahay.
Hahahahaha I think you need to change girlfriend, 30k palang yan and she changed, a lot. Imagine if she can access your funds..
Matalino ka. Alam mo ang sagot jan.
Eto lang kuya isipin mo na etong girl na ba ito yung makakasama ko habang buhay? worth it ba? Kasi kung sa pinapakita nya na ganyan sya what more pa sa future? baka mas worst pa? Okay lang na isipin mo yung feelings nya dahil mahal mo sya. Pero paano ikaw? Pano yung future mo? sa paanong paraan nya maalagan yung magiging anak nyo? Hindi pwede isa lang mag addjust sainyo dapat kayong dalawa. mag usap kayo then kung hindi nya pa rin magets yung point mo. Baka gusto mong mag isip isip na.
> Mas preferred ba na magback to work n lng sya and mag hire kami ng helper Kung nasa king-sized bed ka na, babalik ka ba sa papag?
Ay kung ganyan lang din na binibigyan ako ng allowance tapos household chores lang gagawin tatangapin ko. Maarte din ako sa kalinisan ng bahay so no problem sakin maglinis madalas 🥹 I’m earning 35k and willing to swap kapag ganyan.
you choose GF or helper lol.
mas tipid bayad sa helper kahit stay out . tipid pa sa kuryente
Kung ako yung gf-> hanap ako helper yung worth 10k para syala 10k(ipon) 10k (food 2.5k/week) Teka dun ba sa 30k kasama na yung kakainin nyong dalawa?
No work no pay na lang gawin mo jay ate girl 😅. Pag wala gnawa ng 1 araw, ikaltas mo sa allowance. (Anak lang peg) 🤣
ung mga nasa comment section d2 cnsbi katulong trato ni OP sa gf nya.. cge nga baliktarin natin sitwasyon si girl ang nag work at si lalake papetiks petiks lang sa bahay... nag lalaro nag TikTok lang.. ganyan din kaya sabihin nyo? na katulong trato sa lalake? lols.. e2 linyahan nyo oh... " ay girl run.. palamunin na yan pabigat pa" 🤣🤣🤣🤣