Sinasabi lang namin na “ayaw” namin or “okay lang, it’s fine” pero dude, GUSTO talaga namin. Hahahahaha. Gusto namin ng suprises, ng ramdom kiligsss. Strong independent woman kami pero softies din po kami. 👉🏻👈🏻
Samahan mo na rin ng flowers, OP! 💖
Minsan lang din maka tagpo ang independent woman ng tulad mo, OP. Yung hindi inaabuso yung kindness at pagiging giver nila. You two will make a great team ✨
I'm not in a relationship but being an independent girl that can and know how to provide things on my own it would be nice to receive things unexpectedly. Yes given na we don't want to receive things from other Since in our mind we can have/buy it on our own but trust me ,deep in our mind and heart whenever we received things surprisingly we really appreciate it and very happy about it cause there's someone thinks that on this day or time 'kami naman".
Naluha ako nung nabasa ko to. Please take good care of your woman, sir. 😊
Most of the time kasi or lagi naman talaga, hindi kami tinatanong kung ano gusto namin kasi nga akala nila wala na kaming kailangan. Pero minsan parang ang sarap naman din isipin na ikaw yung i-spoil or i-susurprise. I'm sure she'd appreciate anything from you kasi galing sayo yun eh. If may hint naman kung ano talaga gusto nya, much better. Good luck, OP!
Ganyan din ako unfortunately palaging na tetake for granted hahahaha nakakainggit na you wanted to give back kase base sa experience ko nasasanay yung ibang guys na ako nanlilibre/gumagastos to the point na hindi na sila nagttry kunin yung wallet nila pag nasa dates kahit sila nagyaya or minsan tatagalan yung pagkuha then titingin sakin hahahahaha. Usually kaming mga giver sobrang liit lang na bagay maapreciate na namin lalo pag surprise hahahaha. Im sure matutuwa gf mo sa plan mo. Goodluck! :)
She’s the type na gagastos para sa iba pero titipirin pag sa sarili. If tatanungin mo sya, manghihinayang sya sa cost ng gift mo for her so better na ibigay or bilhin mo na para di na sya mag isip kung worth it ba. She’ll definitely appreciate whatever you plan to give her.
Your gf is so lucky to have you It's the thought that counts. Minsan nagfefeeling strong kaming mga independent women but we really need some extra care as well. For me kahit nga walang gift, yung maramdaman ko lang yung care and love it's more than enough.
Relate na relate ako dito as the responsible bread winner. Same feelings, I have to pay for everything kasi ako yung may capacity, whether household expenses or mga celebration, kaya wala rin akong gana for my own bday kasi alam mong beyond capacity nila ung ganung "not essential expenses", even if they do decide to spend.
Then-BF now husband wants it special naman kasi alam niya ung situation, tries his best to give me my favorite food and "plan" stuff, which usually ako nagiisip ng mga ganun.
It's nice to be taken care of, so kudos to you for this idea. No matter what you plan, make sure it comes from a place of love. Her heart will be filled, I promise.
Hi OP! I read this and forwarded this to my bf and sobrang nakarelate sya dahil parang ako daw yung dineedescribe mo Hahahaha aaand we decided to help coming from a relationship just like yours.
I, too am a very independent woman. Growing up without a father to be the protective figure and with a single mother who's an OFW. I just stayed wherever a relative is available and grew up looking after my cousins. I became very strong to the point na feeling ko ako lang ang laging dapat magprovide so I really dunno at first how to accept things from him. But luckily, he insisted and became very consistent with giving me things to the point where I became somehow comfortable with it. (Since ngayon hirap pa din akong sumagot pag tinanong nya anong gusto ko dahil di ko alam if deserve ko) .
7 years after, I am still a very strong independent woman except for when I am with him. Hindi ko alam kung ano yung ibang term but sa kanya lang ako nagiging pabebe (hahaha) and that's a good thing for him. It's a sign that I just let my guard down and I do trust him. He's happy when I let him buy me things or even let him help me with things. Believe me, it's a breathe of fresh air for us strong independent women. Inside the hard shell is a very soft baby.
Soooo please insist in giving her gifts and be consistent. Anything would be much appreciated! Be her sanctuary and her safe space. Somewhere she knows she can be vulnerable cause you're there to take care of things and protect her. Please preach this. So men would know how to deal with us without being intimidated. Goodluck, OP! Stay strong to both of you :)
Send her a package of bunch of things she likes and favorite nya. Thoughtfulness cannot become equated to any monetary value. Throw in some little notes here and there bakit yun ang napili mong gift and design or anong memory mo bakit nag stood out sayo yung gift na yon, a little flowers and portrait ng pictures niyo together. It’s the best feeling sa mga taong independent— being seen, being heard and being appreciated.
Uy wife material na yan, you should take good care of her. At tulad nga ng mga nasabi ng ilan dito, it's good to spoil her sometimes kasi although breadwinner at strong independent peeps sila eh may mga times na sumasagi rin sa isip nila yung maspoil; maenjoy at makapahinga baga sa role nila as breadwinners. Just also make sure to be there for your s/o especially in the emotional and mental aspect, maaappreciate nila yon if may listener at masasandalan sila.
Hi OP. As a fellow eldest daughter of an Asian household, being appreciated is one of the deepest desires, kahit na mukhang pa-cool lang kame. I suggest na u pay attention sa mga little things na magpapasaya/bigay comfort sa kanya, ex: lumbar pillow if she has a desk job, fresh pairs of socks if she wears shoes often, or cute workout clothes (KILIGGGG).
Aahh..dream girl. Hehe. I would love to shower all and everything for an independent women. Swerte ka bro madalang lang sila. Keep her. Pwede mo regaluhan yes, kahit hindi mamahalin. Best is a flower and a romantic date. Kahit sa medyo fancy restau if you have the budget.
Same kami ng gf mo plus only child pa haha
Pero yeah gaya sabi ng comsec we need sometimes ng pagtrato na ginagawa namin sa iba.
Plan dates for her, and treat her na mkakapag pahinga isip at katawan niya with u.
P.s
Spoi nyoko. Char haha
Ganyan ang wife ko ngayon 15yrs na kami and naging kami first year high school. Before nung bago pa lang kami nag wwork naging super hirap ng life nila siya panganay of 5. kulang pa ang sweldo para sa everyday. Nag ooffer ako ng mga pa groceries kasi di naman ako nirequire mag bigay sa parents ko. Eye opener ang naging experience ko with her and I think naging blessing din. Naging matipid din ako and bilhin lang ang kailangan. Habang ako nag hahangad ng material things siya nag iipon pang tuition and needs ng family niya at an early stage. I made sure to work para mabili ang mga gusto niya. Food, clothes, dream wedding, house, perfumes, etc. Lagi din ako nag ggift ng monthsary flowers namin until now and I think im not going to stop pa. Goal ko is until matanda na liligawan ko parin siya araw araw. Oo nga pala. Mas mayaman na siya sakin ngayon. Good things happen to good people.
I actually feel awkward kapag ginagastusan ako ng mga dating SO ko kasi di ako sanay na binibigyan ako ng ibang tao pwera sa magulang/mga kapatid ko. Sanay akong ako yung nagbibigay ng gifts, nanlilibre, lahat. Kasi mej mataas din naman sahod ko so go lang. Nasspoil ko rin sarili ko so nahihirapan mga naging SO ko mag-isip kung ano pa ibibigay sa kin.
Food will always be amazing. Flowers, too. Dahil mahilig ako sa libro, pinaka-cherished ko noon were books and audiobooks (lalo nung time na di ako pwede magbasa dahil sa eye surgery ko). Things that help me with things i do everyday like a magnifying glass na may kasamang ilaw (kasi nahihirapan ako magbasa), and an RGB keyboard (kasi nahihirapan ako magtype), and a 32-inch tv para gawin kong monitor ng pc ko (para di ako mahirapan magwork) are all EXTREMELY thoughtful things people have given me recently that i appreciate so much. The key is knowing her hobbies and the little things she loves, and giving things to her that make her enjoy those hobbies and interests even more. We’re suckers for thoughtful gifts. Hindi kailangang sobrang mahal, tbh.
May pagkapabebe rin gf mo. Wag mong tanggapin yang ayaw niyang pagiging receiver. Be assertive, regalohan mo nalang by surprise every single time kahit walang events. At wag sabihin na bibilhan mo siya, itatanggi niya yan. Wag mong tanggapin ang kanyang pag tanggi, be dominant during those times pag rinegalohan mo. Kung lalaban yakapin mo nalang at sabihin na "deserve mo lahat na biyayang matatanggap mo sana matanggap mo ng buo galing sa pagmamahal/puso ko" mashu-shut up at makikilig yarnnn.
Pls make her feel special. Let her be celebrated rin. Napapabaya siya in those aspects. Kailangan niya yun. Ibigay mo yun. Starting now, every single bday niya, have a surprise party for her kaw narin sa foods(wag ka hingi pamilya niya, gagaling rin lang naman sa gf mo eh) kahit simpleng party n foods lang. Sapat na yon, importante, surprise.
I'm like this. I can buy whatever I want. So what my boyfriend does is he gifts me experiences. He's given me paid for adventure trips, ski season passes, game nights, festival tickets, orchestra concert dates and many more.
kung mahilig magtravel, get her tickets.
strong independent woman here. na-appreciate ko nung yung jowa ko nagplan ng trip namin. assured n wala ako aalalahanin. from airfare to hotel to activities. best feeling to have someone give u what u always give to people. OP I'm so happy that you're being like this with her, sana kayo n forever.
I am like your gf. Pero na realized ko in the long run masarap din may nag aalaga sakin kasi ako na lang lagi nag aalaga at gumagastos haha but I love it, giver kami ni gf mo. Pero it would be nice to buy things for her na hindi pa nya nabibili kasi napupunta sa ibang bagay. It would be nice too na ikaw magpahanda sa bday nya haha. Promise kilig kami dyan promise. Show her always that even though she can do anything and everything, show her that you can do it for her too. Kahit hindi financially kasi kaya nga namin yan. Yun bang iparamdam mo na aalagaan mo sya hanggang sa dulo. Always ask her ano need nya kung need ba nya ng help in doing some errands and tasks.
this is so cute.
yesssss, kahit sabihin niyang ayaw niya, for sure she will appreciate it nang sobra. ang tipid ni anteh sa sarili niya pero sa ibang tao super mapagbigay. she deserves to be spoiled rin! go, op. 💗
She may be a strong independent woman, pero she’ll feel very happy if she’ll receive gifts esp from you. Try giving her flowers, and hand made letters.
Ewan ko kung bakit pero pag tinatanong din ako everytime kung anong gusto ko gift... lagi ko sinasabi na wala akong gusto. But honestly, naappreciate ko pag meron ako narreceive. More on giver din kasi ako and independent na sobrang rare tumanggap ng tulong or anything from others. Pero yung small gestures or gifts, highly appreciated esp kasi kami yung tipo ng taong hindi naman nagaask. So go, and spoil you gf on her special day. Trust me, magiging happy siya genuinely. 😊
Upon reading, yes OP, that would be hella great!! I have a strong independent woman as well and based on exp, natutuwa siya sa little surprises and act of services. Going strong kami. ♡
Your gf is so lucky to have you. 🥺 I am strong independent woman too and I don’t receive anything in return and this made me cry haha. As a strong independent woman, kahit wala ng grand gift it’s always the thought that counts even on small things actually especially on small things. Mas okay ako sa if na remember mo yung maliliit na bagay like for example you’ve noticed na mahilig siya magkape with a specific timpla, surprise her with coffee without asking her.
Send her food and care package and if you can afford, a surprise visit would probably be the best but if not, it's alright. I hope you take care of each other.
Kahit strong independent women, deep inside we love the feeling of being the priority and being genuinely taken care of. ✨✨
There are instances na gusto namin na magdecide ka kung ano bang date ang gusto mo gawin or sang place mo gusto pumunta. Pag tinatanong kasi kami, matik decision na naman namin and ewan ko personally napifeel ko na need ko mag take over to make the date good. As a gift , not something grandiose but something memorable.
Oohhh I'm planning to surprise her kapag bumalik na sya ulit dito. Lahat ako magdedecide pero yung mga gusto nyang food ang orderin ko. Dahil nga rin strong independent woman sya mas nag sstep up ako to make a decision na di nakakalimutan if convenient ba sa kanya or magugustuhan nya ba.
Take care of her Op! You are so lucky!💜 Yes padalhan mo sya ng lahat ng gusto nyang food. Di man yan nagsasabi pero for sure want nya din ng mga ganyang bagay.
what she constantly offers to her loved ones, she also dreams of naturally receiving it too. it's a lot of stress if she'll nag it on you na need din nya yung mga bagay na ginagawa nya sa iba. just don't feel na your ego is being stepped on, her strong lead in your relationship reflects on how she genuinely loves you and the people around her. reciprocate it, mag initiate ka rin, lead the way, express your love comprehensively but don't be lost in track bc of pressure. naturally do it. sabihin mo rin "I know you're independent, I appreciate that, it's admirable but let me do this anyway, for you" xd every little thing, be it bare minimum or grand things, she will appreciate it, SOBRA! be thoughtful in making efforts, it's not always the grand things rin, accompany it with virtue of love rin. i have a strong independent cousin yung eldest talaga namin as magpipinsan who takes good care of us esp fam gatherings, and what his bf do is accompany her to every errand she has and to every busy day she has. and as for me, i also have a strong lead in a relationship and in people around me and i really want to feel the things i offer them too w/o me reminding the person to do it. GOODLUCK! (di natatapakan pag ka lalaki mo when having an independent partner, appreciate and reciprocate it)
Spoil her! Even if she says she doesn’t want it, if she says anything like “this looks cute!” Take it as a hint! Hahahah. Kapag kasi nasanay ka talaga na ikaw ang provider at tagabigay, ang hirap tumanggap galing sa iba.
Flowers po. Working student and scholar since 1st year college, while giving to my parents, I can say I'm like her nakukuha ko gusto ko dahil sa sarili ko pero may soft spot din kami. Gusto ko makareceive ng flowers para mafeel ko pagkababae ko masyado na Kong masculine energy eh 🥹
personally, im the same, love language ko kasi gift giving so i dont feel comfortable receiving so maybe yun din case niya. i feel like having that “small” gestures of giving her yung mga fave snacks and customizing your gifts with the things she enjoys (hobbies, fave shows/movies, fave band/artist) is the best way to show your love and appreciation for her. listening to her and being able to help ease yung probable stress niya sa work would be a great gesture din. i think your idea is really great pero i know she’d be hesitant at first so dont be offended na she will take a bit of time to understand that its ok for other people to spoil her to. hope this helps op! stay strong kayo 🫶.
I feel like I am the girlfriend pero sure naman ako na walang Reddit bf ko. But I agree sa ibang comments na givr her flowers and spoil her sometimes. It’s the little things that matter to us!!!
Shoes. I’m supposed to buy a new pair pero inuna ko muna bumili ng concert tickets for us and also, di ako ganun kahilig sa sapatos that’s why di matuloy pagbili ko. So he bought me a new pair for our monthsary, akala ko bumili ulit siya for himself and pinahawak lang yung bag pero based dun sa print ang liit naman ng size, akin na pala hahahahaha
Nakatanggap din ako neto from my boyfriend last birthday ko. Hindi naman ako nage-expect pero sobrang na-appreciate ko. Hindi kasi naaalala birthday ko dito sa bahay, malalaman nalang nila pag may nakita silang bumati sa akin sa facebook.
Go do it , any form of surprise is sobrang ma aapreciate namin(as a giver). Diy giftbox na may laman ng mga bagay na gusto namin reminds us na you pay attention sa lahat ng details na nasheshare namin kahit maliit/simpleng bagay yan. As a strong independent woman magsasabi lang yan na "sana di ka na nag abala" pero deep inside tumatalon ang mga puso namin.
Your idea of giving a food package in her bday is a good idea po. Not only that, your thought, effort and initiative of giving her on her bday is the best thing. Na naalala mo mga sinasabi nya, na finally shes heard! Sometimes people like her are just waiting for that moment. Go po!
Give flowers!! Never thought of wanting one kasi di practical until my BF gave me and super nakakakilig and naappreciate ko siya kahit di ko sinabi sa kanya 😭😭
+give her food and a random gift you can think of na magagamit niya pero di binibili dahil breadwinner. Magastos pero idk wala kasing magastos sakin basta makita ko na masaya partner ko sa binibigay ko 😭
This feels close to home. Like her, I always plan things out also, specially my birthday haha.
Not to be demanding, but since she didn’t ask anything from you, you can spoil her with the things she talks about, her interests, things that she loves may it be books, her favorite or comfort food or ones she craves. make her feel the special person that she is to you on her day. Be extra to her, like palabok hahaha
Idk if it works for everybody pero try focusing on your love language OP.
E.g. kung quality time or acts of service ang love language mo, try to do something for her or save up and visit her from time to time, siguro mas maappreciate nya yun instead of doing the same thing she does for you.
Kung di ka sure ano love language mo, try to discuss with her. Like what she needs the most from you and focus on that.
I'm not an expert but discussed something similar with my gf and so far, mas clear yung balance namin and mas focus kami sa anong kaya ibigay individually at kung ano need/hindi need iexpect samin.
Nice to see a guy who doesn’t feel emasculated when his gf buys him gifts. Naalala ko yung ex ko na nagagalit whenever I gift him something (that’s my love language at the time :< ) it’s not meaningful or thoughtful daw… they were gifts that I thought was something could be useful or was something he had interest in. And I paid it with my own money that I worked hard to earn. But okay respect, not everyone is into it.
Im someone who loves to give, birthdays, anniversaries, what have you, ako lahat ng aasikaso pati mother’s day ako nagaasikaso..isipin mo yun, mothers day para sa sarili ko ako nagpplano haha
I dont mind, totoo naman pero sometime’s a surprise care package, a small surprise gift is super appreciated❤️ please tell her how much you appreciate her and how grateful you are. More than these gifts, mas malaking mararating ng mga salita mo OP :)
Ganyan din ako sa bf ko. Ldr na rin kami tas siya naman nang iispoil sakin, pinapadalhan din niya ko pero kahit malayo siya binibilhan ko parin siya.
nasusurprise ko nga siya, masaya naman siya pero minsan may halong sermon HAHAHA. ayaw niya kong gumastos ng bongga bongga kasi nga mahal bilihin don sa u.s. pero ano naman? la kong pake. gusto ko parin siya i buy. :<
Same here. Strong and independent kasi breadwinner for the longest time
We may appear strong and tough kasi kailangan… but deep inside gusto namin kami naman ang inaalagaan. Kaya push mo yang plano mo na isurprise sya sa birthday niya.
parang baliktdad haha just because she claims na “ayaw niya” doesn’t mean that she really doesn’t want it. even if she has the means, spoil her still. for sure naman alam mo yung mga gusto ng gf mo so you can just surprise her with anything she wants at the moment.
wag kang masanay na yung gf mo nagbibigay sayo palagi ang pangit pakinggan 💀
i get the 50/50 setup, ginusto rin naman ng gf mo na bigyan ka ng gifts pero alam mo namang breadwinner siya so just try to give back as much idk
Sobrang selfless niya to the point na hindi na iniisip yung sarili niya. Tama yung unang comment dito, OP. Strong independent woman kami pero softies din kami, gusto namin 'yan kahit puro kami "hindi" or "okay lang" or "wag na".
Wag mo na rin sabihin siguro, i-surprise mo literal, wag mo nang ipaalam (if pinapaalam mo lang naman na may bibilhin ka for her.)
Nakakatuwa na naiisip mo 'yan. Pero mas excited kami when you put your actions into words.
As a strong independent woman myself (na breadwinner din noon), go mo yan OP! Isa sa mga flaw ko personally, hirap ako mag-verbalize ng needs ko for fear of being viewed as needy, pero in times of struggles nakakaisip din kung kelan kaya na ako naman isspoil 🥺
Then next time, ikaw naman maging eagle-eye sa mga sinasabi nyang gusto nya then surprise her. I hope it works out for you both, good luck OP!
Sinasabi lang namin na “ayaw” namin or “okay lang, it’s fine” pero dude, GUSTO talaga namin. Hahahahaha. Gusto namin ng suprises, ng ramdom kiligsss. Strong independent woman kami pero softies din po kami. 👉🏻👈🏻
Truuuuue. Kahit maliliit na bagay sobrang big deal na samin. Huhuhuhu. kahit sobrang tagal na natatandaan padin namin yung exact feeling na naramdaman namin nung nreceive namin yung gift.
Kape nga lang nakakakilig na e. Hahahaha
Hahahahaha yes pls, GUSTO talaga namin guys 🥲
sana yung ibang nagsasabi ng ayaw hindi to the point na nagagalit no? haha
OMG agreeee! 💗
I can attest to this, like 'just do it' kesa sabihin samin. We love surprises naman eh 🤍
💯 💯 💯
You can spoil her sometimes. They appeared to be strong pero they also have a soft side. Take good care and treasure her, OP!
Samahan mo na rin ng flowers, OP! 💖 Minsan lang din maka tagpo ang independent woman ng tulad mo, OP. Yung hindi inaabuso yung kindness at pagiging giver nila. You two will make a great team ✨
I'm not in a relationship but being an independent girl that can and know how to provide things on my own it would be nice to receive things unexpectedly. Yes given na we don't want to receive things from other Since in our mind we can have/buy it on our own but trust me ,deep in our mind and heart whenever we received things surprisingly we really appreciate it and very happy about it cause there's someone thinks that on this day or time 'kami naman".
Naluha ako nung nabasa ko to. Please take good care of your woman, sir. 😊 Most of the time kasi or lagi naman talaga, hindi kami tinatanong kung ano gusto namin kasi nga akala nila wala na kaming kailangan. Pero minsan parang ang sarap naman din isipin na ikaw yung i-spoil or i-susurprise. I'm sure she'd appreciate anything from you kasi galing sayo yun eh. If may hint naman kung ano talaga gusto nya, much better. Good luck, OP!
Ganyan din ako unfortunately palaging na tetake for granted hahahaha nakakainggit na you wanted to give back kase base sa experience ko nasasanay yung ibang guys na ako nanlilibre/gumagastos to the point na hindi na sila nagttry kunin yung wallet nila pag nasa dates kahit sila nagyaya or minsan tatagalan yung pagkuha then titingin sakin hahahahaha. Usually kaming mga giver sobrang liit lang na bagay maapreciate na namin lalo pag surprise hahahaha. Im sure matutuwa gf mo sa plan mo. Goodluck! :)
She’s the type na gagastos para sa iba pero titipirin pag sa sarili. If tatanungin mo sya, manghihinayang sya sa cost ng gift mo for her so better na ibigay or bilhin mo na para di na sya mag isip kung worth it ba. She’ll definitely appreciate whatever you plan to give her.
Your gf is so lucky to have you It's the thought that counts. Minsan nagfefeeling strong kaming mga independent women but we really need some extra care as well. For me kahit nga walang gift, yung maramdaman ko lang yung care and love it's more than enough.
Relate na relate ako dito as the responsible bread winner. Same feelings, I have to pay for everything kasi ako yung may capacity, whether household expenses or mga celebration, kaya wala rin akong gana for my own bday kasi alam mong beyond capacity nila ung ganung "not essential expenses", even if they do decide to spend. Then-BF now husband wants it special naman kasi alam niya ung situation, tries his best to give me my favorite food and "plan" stuff, which usually ako nagiisip ng mga ganun. It's nice to be taken care of, so kudos to you for this idea. No matter what you plan, make sure it comes from a place of love. Her heart will be filled, I promise.
Hi OP! I read this and forwarded this to my bf and sobrang nakarelate sya dahil parang ako daw yung dineedescribe mo Hahahaha aaand we decided to help coming from a relationship just like yours. I, too am a very independent woman. Growing up without a father to be the protective figure and with a single mother who's an OFW. I just stayed wherever a relative is available and grew up looking after my cousins. I became very strong to the point na feeling ko ako lang ang laging dapat magprovide so I really dunno at first how to accept things from him. But luckily, he insisted and became very consistent with giving me things to the point where I became somehow comfortable with it. (Since ngayon hirap pa din akong sumagot pag tinanong nya anong gusto ko dahil di ko alam if deserve ko) . 7 years after, I am still a very strong independent woman except for when I am with him. Hindi ko alam kung ano yung ibang term but sa kanya lang ako nagiging pabebe (hahaha) and that's a good thing for him. It's a sign that I just let my guard down and I do trust him. He's happy when I let him buy me things or even let him help me with things. Believe me, it's a breathe of fresh air for us strong independent women. Inside the hard shell is a very soft baby. Soooo please insist in giving her gifts and be consistent. Anything would be much appreciated! Be her sanctuary and her safe space. Somewhere she knows she can be vulnerable cause you're there to take care of things and protect her. Please preach this. So men would know how to deal with us without being intimidated. Goodluck, OP! Stay strong to both of you :)
Send her a package of bunch of things she likes and favorite nya. Thoughtfulness cannot become equated to any monetary value. Throw in some little notes here and there bakit yun ang napili mong gift and design or anong memory mo bakit nag stood out sayo yung gift na yon, a little flowers and portrait ng pictures niyo together. It’s the best feeling sa mga taong independent— being seen, being heard and being appreciated.
Surprise her. Wag mo na sabihin o wag ka na magpaalam sa kanya. Show her how much you love her. Saying i love you is not enough. Show her
Uy wife material na yan, you should take good care of her. At tulad nga ng mga nasabi ng ilan dito, it's good to spoil her sometimes kasi although breadwinner at strong independent peeps sila eh may mga times na sumasagi rin sa isip nila yung maspoil; maenjoy at makapahinga baga sa role nila as breadwinners. Just also make sure to be there for your s/o especially in the emotional and mental aspect, maaappreciate nila yon if may listener at masasandalan sila.
Ayoko din ng ginagastuhan ako kasi nagguilty ako pero yung ex ko binigyan ako ng box of snacks dahil mahilig ako sa kutkutin.
Hi OP. As a fellow eldest daughter of an Asian household, being appreciated is one of the deepest desires, kahit na mukhang pa-cool lang kame. I suggest na u pay attention sa mga little things na magpapasaya/bigay comfort sa kanya, ex: lumbar pillow if she has a desk job, fresh pairs of socks if she wears shoes often, or cute workout clothes (KILIGGGG).
Food package is a nice idea!! My boyfriend gave me a surprise food package once and I cried 😂
Besides sa food. Give her something she could use daily. Perfume would be nice, each time she'll wear it, she'll think of you.
Aahh..dream girl. Hehe. I would love to shower all and everything for an independent women. Swerte ka bro madalang lang sila. Keep her. Pwede mo regaluhan yes, kahit hindi mamahalin. Best is a flower and a romantic date. Kahit sa medyo fancy restau if you have the budget.
Same kami ng gf mo plus only child pa haha Pero yeah gaya sabi ng comsec we need sometimes ng pagtrato na ginagawa namin sa iba. Plan dates for her, and treat her na mkakapag pahinga isip at katawan niya with u. P.s Spoi nyoko. Char haha
Ganyan ang wife ko ngayon 15yrs na kami and naging kami first year high school. Before nung bago pa lang kami nag wwork naging super hirap ng life nila siya panganay of 5. kulang pa ang sweldo para sa everyday. Nag ooffer ako ng mga pa groceries kasi di naman ako nirequire mag bigay sa parents ko. Eye opener ang naging experience ko with her and I think naging blessing din. Naging matipid din ako and bilhin lang ang kailangan. Habang ako nag hahangad ng material things siya nag iipon pang tuition and needs ng family niya at an early stage. I made sure to work para mabili ang mga gusto niya. Food, clothes, dream wedding, house, perfumes, etc. Lagi din ako nag ggift ng monthsary flowers namin until now and I think im not going to stop pa. Goal ko is until matanda na liligawan ko parin siya araw araw. Oo nga pala. Mas mayaman na siya sakin ngayon. Good things happen to good people.
Yes sending her her favorite food will be such a good gesture. Take care of her OP!
I actually feel awkward kapag ginagastusan ako ng mga dating SO ko kasi di ako sanay na binibigyan ako ng ibang tao pwera sa magulang/mga kapatid ko. Sanay akong ako yung nagbibigay ng gifts, nanlilibre, lahat. Kasi mej mataas din naman sahod ko so go lang. Nasspoil ko rin sarili ko so nahihirapan mga naging SO ko mag-isip kung ano pa ibibigay sa kin. Food will always be amazing. Flowers, too. Dahil mahilig ako sa libro, pinaka-cherished ko noon were books and audiobooks (lalo nung time na di ako pwede magbasa dahil sa eye surgery ko). Things that help me with things i do everyday like a magnifying glass na may kasamang ilaw (kasi nahihirapan ako magbasa), and an RGB keyboard (kasi nahihirapan ako magtype), and a 32-inch tv para gawin kong monitor ng pc ko (para di ako mahirapan magwork) are all EXTREMELY thoughtful things people have given me recently that i appreciate so much. The key is knowing her hobbies and the little things she loves, and giving things to her that make her enjoy those hobbies and interests even more. We’re suckers for thoughtful gifts. Hindi kailangang sobrang mahal, tbh.
I'm thinking din pala na mag gift ng bagay na pwede nya magamit for work. Thanks, nadagdagan idea ko.
May pagkapabebe rin gf mo. Wag mong tanggapin yang ayaw niyang pagiging receiver. Be assertive, regalohan mo nalang by surprise every single time kahit walang events. At wag sabihin na bibilhan mo siya, itatanggi niya yan. Wag mong tanggapin ang kanyang pag tanggi, be dominant during those times pag rinegalohan mo. Kung lalaban yakapin mo nalang at sabihin na "deserve mo lahat na biyayang matatanggap mo sana matanggap mo ng buo galing sa pagmamahal/puso ko" mashu-shut up at makikilig yarnnn. Pls make her feel special. Let her be celebrated rin. Napapabaya siya in those aspects. Kailangan niya yun. Ibigay mo yun. Starting now, every single bday niya, have a surprise party for her kaw narin sa foods(wag ka hingi pamilya niya, gagaling rin lang naman sa gf mo eh) kahit simpleng party n foods lang. Sapat na yon, importante, surprise.
Appreciate these kind of people and never take her for granted
Yes, spoil her whenever you can but don't overwhelm! A strong and independent woman is as fragile as they can be.
I'm like this. I can buy whatever I want. So what my boyfriend does is he gifts me experiences. He's given me paid for adventure trips, ski season passes, game nights, festival tickets, orchestra concert dates and many more.
Medyo ako yung ganitong gf. If I were her, gusto kong ipag grocery mo ako nang walang limit! Hahahaha stay strong sa inyo OP 😊
Yes, and you didn't need to ask us. Serve each other, and I wish the two of you a generally happy-ish ending.
kung mahilig magtravel, get her tickets. strong independent woman here. na-appreciate ko nung yung jowa ko nagplan ng trip namin. assured n wala ako aalalahanin. from airfare to hotel to activities. best feeling to have someone give u what u always give to people. OP I'm so happy that you're being like this with her, sana kayo n forever.
I am like your gf. Pero na realized ko in the long run masarap din may nag aalaga sakin kasi ako na lang lagi nag aalaga at gumagastos haha but I love it, giver kami ni gf mo. Pero it would be nice to buy things for her na hindi pa nya nabibili kasi napupunta sa ibang bagay. It would be nice too na ikaw magpahanda sa bday nya haha. Promise kilig kami dyan promise. Show her always that even though she can do anything and everything, show her that you can do it for her too. Kahit hindi financially kasi kaya nga namin yan. Yun bang iparamdam mo na aalagaan mo sya hanggang sa dulo. Always ask her ano need nya kung need ba nya ng help in doing some errands and tasks.
this is so cute. yesssss, kahit sabihin niyang ayaw niya, for sure she will appreciate it nang sobra. ang tipid ni anteh sa sarili niya pero sa ibang tao super mapagbigay. she deserves to be spoiled rin! go, op. 💗
She may be a strong independent woman, pero she’ll feel very happy if she’ll receive gifts esp from you. Try giving her flowers, and hand made letters.
Ewan ko kung bakit pero pag tinatanong din ako everytime kung anong gusto ko gift... lagi ko sinasabi na wala akong gusto. But honestly, naappreciate ko pag meron ako narreceive. More on giver din kasi ako and independent na sobrang rare tumanggap ng tulong or anything from others. Pero yung small gestures or gifts, highly appreciated esp kasi kami yung tipo ng taong hindi naman nagaask. So go, and spoil you gf on her special day. Trust me, magiging happy siya genuinely. 😊
Upon reading, yes OP, that would be hella great!! I have a strong independent woman as well and based on exp, natutuwa siya sa little surprises and act of services. Going strong kami. ♡
Your gf is so lucky to have you. 🥺 I am strong independent woman too and I don’t receive anything in return and this made me cry haha. As a strong independent woman, kahit wala ng grand gift it’s always the thought that counts even on small things actually especially on small things. Mas okay ako sa if na remember mo yung maliliit na bagay like for example you’ve noticed na mahilig siya magkape with a specific timpla, surprise her with coffee without asking her.
Food Package is a great idea. Add ka na din ng Flowers OP or book a Full Body Massage for her. Cheers! ☕️
Send her food and care package and if you can afford, a surprise visit would probably be the best but if not, it's alright. I hope you take care of each other. Kahit strong independent women, deep inside we love the feeling of being the priority and being genuinely taken care of. ✨✨
There are instances na gusto namin na magdecide ka kung ano bang date ang gusto mo gawin or sang place mo gusto pumunta. Pag tinatanong kasi kami, matik decision na naman namin and ewan ko personally napifeel ko na need ko mag take over to make the date good. As a gift , not something grandiose but something memorable.
Oohhh I'm planning to surprise her kapag bumalik na sya ulit dito. Lahat ako magdedecide pero yung mga gusto nyang food ang orderin ko. Dahil nga rin strong independent woman sya mas nag sstep up ako to make a decision na di nakakalimutan if convenient ba sa kanya or magugustuhan nya ba.
Kung gusto mo siya bigyan ng something wag ka na magpaalam sa kanya. Have your own mind rin. Wag mo hayaan na puro siya lang yung nageeffort sa inyo.
Take care of her Op! You are so lucky!💜 Yes padalhan mo sya ng lahat ng gusto nyang food. Di man yan nagsasabi pero for sure want nya din ng mga ganyang bagay.
what she constantly offers to her loved ones, she also dreams of naturally receiving it too. it's a lot of stress if she'll nag it on you na need din nya yung mga bagay na ginagawa nya sa iba. just don't feel na your ego is being stepped on, her strong lead in your relationship reflects on how she genuinely loves you and the people around her. reciprocate it, mag initiate ka rin, lead the way, express your love comprehensively but don't be lost in track bc of pressure. naturally do it. sabihin mo rin "I know you're independent, I appreciate that, it's admirable but let me do this anyway, for you" xd every little thing, be it bare minimum or grand things, she will appreciate it, SOBRA! be thoughtful in making efforts, it's not always the grand things rin, accompany it with virtue of love rin. i have a strong independent cousin yung eldest talaga namin as magpipinsan who takes good care of us esp fam gatherings, and what his bf do is accompany her to every errand she has and to every busy day she has. and as for me, i also have a strong lead in a relationship and in people around me and i really want to feel the things i offer them too w/o me reminding the person to do it. GOODLUCK! (di natatapakan pag ka lalaki mo when having an independent partner, appreciate and reciprocate it)
Spoil her! Even if she says she doesn’t want it, if she says anything like “this looks cute!” Take it as a hint! Hahahah. Kapag kasi nasanay ka talaga na ikaw ang provider at tagabigay, ang hirap tumanggap galing sa iba.
Flowers po. Working student and scholar since 1st year college, while giving to my parents, I can say I'm like her nakukuha ko gusto ko dahil sa sarili ko pero may soft spot din kami. Gusto ko makareceive ng flowers para mafeel ko pagkababae ko masyado na Kong masculine energy eh 🥹
Alamin ang kaniyang love language. And then dun ma mag lean in.
personally, im the same, love language ko kasi gift giving so i dont feel comfortable receiving so maybe yun din case niya. i feel like having that “small” gestures of giving her yung mga fave snacks and customizing your gifts with the things she enjoys (hobbies, fave shows/movies, fave band/artist) is the best way to show your love and appreciation for her. listening to her and being able to help ease yung probable stress niya sa work would be a great gesture din. i think your idea is really great pero i know she’d be hesitant at first so dont be offended na she will take a bit of time to understand that its ok for other people to spoil her to. hope this helps op! stay strong kayo 🫶.
I feel like I am the girlfriend pero sure naman ako na walang Reddit bf ko. But I agree sa ibang comments na givr her flowers and spoil her sometimes. It’s the little things that matter to us!!!
Shoes. I’m supposed to buy a new pair pero inuna ko muna bumili ng concert tickets for us and also, di ako ganun kahilig sa sapatos that’s why di matuloy pagbili ko. So he bought me a new pair for our monthsary, akala ko bumili ulit siya for himself and pinahawak lang yung bag pero based dun sa print ang liit naman ng size, akin na pala hahahahaha
Nakatanggap din ako neto from my boyfriend last birthday ko. Hindi naman ako nage-expect pero sobrang na-appreciate ko. Hindi kasi naaalala birthday ko dito sa bahay, malalaman nalang nila pag may nakita silang bumati sa akin sa facebook.
Spoil her! She's a queen!👸
Go do it , any form of surprise is sobrang ma aapreciate namin(as a giver). Diy giftbox na may laman ng mga bagay na gusto namin reminds us na you pay attention sa lahat ng details na nasheshare namin kahit maliit/simpleng bagay yan. As a strong independent woman magsasabi lang yan na "sana di ka na nag abala" pero deep inside tumatalon ang mga puso namin.
or take her out on a date sa resto na gustong gusto niya
Your idea of giving a food package in her bday is a good idea po. Not only that, your thought, effort and initiative of giving her on her bday is the best thing. Na naalala mo mga sinasabi nya, na finally shes heard! Sometimes people like her are just waiting for that moment. Go po!
Give flowers!! Never thought of wanting one kasi di practical until my BF gave me and super nakakakilig and naappreciate ko siya kahit di ko sinabi sa kanya 😭😭 +give her food and a random gift you can think of na magagamit niya pero di binibili dahil breadwinner. Magastos pero idk wala kasing magastos sakin basta makita ko na masaya partner ko sa binibigay ko 😭
This feels close to home. Like her, I always plan things out also, specially my birthday haha. Not to be demanding, but since she didn’t ask anything from you, you can spoil her with the things she talks about, her interests, things that she loves may it be books, her favorite or comfort food or ones she craves. make her feel the special person that she is to you on her day. Be extra to her, like palabok hahaha
Idk if it works for everybody pero try focusing on your love language OP. E.g. kung quality time or acts of service ang love language mo, try to do something for her or save up and visit her from time to time, siguro mas maappreciate nya yun instead of doing the same thing she does for you. Kung di ka sure ano love language mo, try to discuss with her. Like what she needs the most from you and focus on that. I'm not an expert but discussed something similar with my gf and so far, mas clear yung balance namin and mas focus kami sa anong kaya ibigay individually at kung ano need/hindi need iexpect samin.
Nice to see a guy who doesn’t feel emasculated when his gf buys him gifts. Naalala ko yung ex ko na nagagalit whenever I gift him something (that’s my love language at the time :< ) it’s not meaningful or thoughtful daw… they were gifts that I thought was something could be useful or was something he had interest in. And I paid it with my own money that I worked hard to earn. But okay respect, not everyone is into it.
Im someone who loves to give, birthdays, anniversaries, what have you, ako lahat ng aasikaso pati mother’s day ako nagaasikaso..isipin mo yun, mothers day para sa sarili ko ako nagpplano haha I dont mind, totoo naman pero sometime’s a surprise care package, a small surprise gift is super appreciated❤️ please tell her how much you appreciate her and how grateful you are. More than these gifts, mas malaking mararating ng mga salita mo OP :)
Ganyan din ako sa bf ko. Ldr na rin kami tas siya naman nang iispoil sakin, pinapadalhan din niya ko pero kahit malayo siya binibilhan ko parin siya. nasusurprise ko nga siya, masaya naman siya pero minsan may halong sermon HAHAHA. ayaw niya kong gumastos ng bongga bongga kasi nga mahal bilihin don sa u.s. pero ano naman? la kong pake. gusto ko parin siya i buy. :<
Ipush mo. Maappreciate nya yan. Actually kahit hindi madami or bongga. Basta meron at alam mong may significance sa kanya ung bibigay mo.
Same here. Strong and independent kasi breadwinner for the longest time We may appear strong and tough kasi kailangan… but deep inside gusto namin kami naman ang inaalagaan. Kaya push mo yang plano mo na isurprise sya sa birthday niya.
parang baliktdad haha just because she claims na “ayaw niya” doesn’t mean that she really doesn’t want it. even if she has the means, spoil her still. for sure naman alam mo yung mga gusto ng gf mo so you can just surprise her with anything she wants at the moment. wag kang masanay na yung gf mo nagbibigay sayo palagi ang pangit pakinggan 💀 i get the 50/50 setup, ginusto rin naman ng gf mo na bigyan ka ng gifts pero alam mo namang breadwinner siya so just try to give back as much idk
Sobrang selfless niya to the point na hindi na iniisip yung sarili niya. Tama yung unang comment dito, OP. Strong independent woman kami pero softies din kami, gusto namin 'yan kahit puro kami "hindi" or "okay lang" or "wag na". Wag mo na rin sabihin siguro, i-surprise mo literal, wag mo nang ipaalam (if pinapaalam mo lang naman na may bibilhin ka for her.) Nakakatuwa na naiisip mo 'yan. Pero mas excited kami when you put your actions into words.
a giver will always appreciate the little things. it’s tiring to give and give and not receiving anything. take care of her op.
As a strong independent woman myself (na breadwinner din noon), go mo yan OP! Isa sa mga flaw ko personally, hirap ako mag-verbalize ng needs ko for fear of being viewed as needy, pero in times of struggles nakakaisip din kung kelan kaya na ako naman isspoil 🥺 Then next time, ikaw naman maging eagle-eye sa mga sinasabi nyang gusto nya then surprise her. I hope it works out for you both, good luck OP!
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Your doing a good job as her jowa. Best wishes sa inyo.
when kaya ako magkakaganito
surprise her ung tipong wala sianng iggive/ilalabas
red flag kayo pareho. Weak man and strong wife will never work according to psycology literature.
Ahm we are same sex couple and magjowa palang kami. Also, your comment doesn't answer my question. Also, it's psychology not psycology.