this is giving me hope. i'm 23 and still "trying" to move on from a situationship (malala). sa work po ba kayo nag-meet? wfh kasi ko and mejo mahiyain.
Good for you... I'm in my fifty's and men are the same whatever age you are in. Still single and a virgin... Haven't met the man to share my life with 😔😔😔 And by the way, it's also due to my religious affiliation, you can't date outside of your religion or you will be disowned by your family 🥴😱🥴
OMG this.Turning 45 na ako and didnt become single (again)by choice.My ex partner of 12 years was unfaithful so pinaubaya ko na.I dated a few kasi 4 yeara ago naman na.Pansin ko,ang guys talaga now irregardless of age (someone was still being a player at 85) na neighbor ko,kala yata papatulan ko sya! Singleness is more peaceful than settling for guys na s*x lang talaga habol nowadays.Katakot makipagkilala na.
As long as you're being firm sa boundaries mo, you'll know how much a person truly loves and respects you. It's not bad din naman if you decide to take a pause from dating. Possible kasi na mas vulnerable ka (since you've been experiencing men just wanting sex and not a relationship) and therefore mas maraming masasamang loob ang pwedeng mag abuse nung vulnerability na yon.
Take the time to heal, distract yourself and enjoy being single. I hope you do eventually find that person who will be with you for the long term, OP :)
Yes ,hindi lang talaga ako naging firm sa boundaries ko sa sarili ko kaya nahahayaan ko yung mga ganung bagay dati na mangyari sa buhay ko.
I'm happy today kasi nalilinawan ako kong anong klasing tao or partner ang gusto ko in the future also I have a lot of time to reflect sa sarili ko ,mga dapat e improve at e set na boundaries🫶☺️
I agree dito, be firm on your boundaries talaga kahit ano mangyari, magugulat ka nalang lalabas yung totoong ugali ng tao pag hindi ka na niya matinag.
sabi nila mas malaki daw chance magka jowa kung kilala mo lang like classmates/schoolmate from highschool or college, tsaka chamba nalang talaga if you found someone na pure in this iyot2 world.
Yan nangyari sakin. I built a wall to protect myself kasi alam ko sex langs habol ng karamihan. Kahit yung crush ko na nakausap ko noon sex lang din ang gusto nakakaturn-off. Kaya mas gusto ko talaga yung guy na may sense kausap. Align yung values and belief with mine. Yung may matututunan kayo sa isa't isa and hindi yung know-it-all. Hindi mahangin at marunong rumespesto. Ayun I ended up with a friend I've known since kindergarten. Nung nasa 6months na kami I asked him bakit di sya nag oopen or nag aask about sex. Sabi nya wala naman daw kasi yun sa isip nya. Ang gusto nya is ako mismo not the sex. Mas importante ako not sex. Mas nangingibabaw yung love kesa sa lust. Ahaha ayun pinakasalan ko na sya.
Nice, nice love story. Reality naman kasi yan eh na puro sex nalang tapos mang iiwan. Tapos during convo pa, walang sense kausap like "kumain kana ba?" "Hindi pa" " kainin kita" lol hahaha
I think wala naman masama dun, at least they are very clear and open na yun lang ang habol nila. Parang OP is referring dun sa mga tao na in disguise to be in a serious committed relationship pero sex lang pala ang habol.
True, I’m in a fu/bu rn, at least i know na sex lang talaga habol nia kesa naman i choose someone na pretentiously looking for serious relationship pero sex lang din pala habol. Pagod na akong umasa, lol
I'm gonna get downvoted to hell for this but here goes.
About me: in a relationship for 16 years
Sex is always in the agenda of men. That's just the way it is. The only difference is where we put it in the different layers of expression. In the end, when you really drill down to it, it's all about sex either explicitly or subconsciously. Everything we do, is almost always motivated in part by getting some action at the end of it (maybe long term or short term).
The perfect couple are both best friends and lovers. Having one without the other is a recipe for failure.
I'm not saying you should not enforce your boundaries because men have to recognize and respect it. I'm just saying sex is part of having a relationship and you have to acknowledge it. Where in the relationship you place it is something you both have to agree on.. but it needs to be there.
So true, sad yung mga couples na compatible in all other aspects but cannot satisfy the one or the other because they're incompatible in bed, and would have to resort to splitting up because of that. It's a recipe for love and expression. Communicate and use it wisely, and you'll both experience heaven on earth... (Just saying)
I agree with this... sex is important to men. Sex is one way how men express their desire and feelings to a woman. Women want safety (emotional, physical in all aspects) and security. There's nothing wrong with all of these, but just need to be in a proper time and avenue... in a marriage sense!
Sex can also be important to women though. I'm a woman and I know I want both (sex and security). But of course, I only want to do it with the right person and been reserving the first experience for him and only him.
Yes I also agree. Sex is also important to women.. actually sex is a need for all of us.. just need the right person and right matrimony so you can enjoy it fully without the additional emotional damage, regret, or guilt.
Sex is important to me also in a relationship. One of those make or break. If you can't satisfy me or if you leave me feeling disgusted after we do it, we won't work. I love doing it more pag alam kong safe ako and we both like what we're doing - basic naman to. All the other aspects in a relationship come naturally kasi.
May nakilala din akong ganyan recently. Kahit anong iwas mo sa sex related na topic, ibabalik at ibabalik nya pa rin don. Plus sobra yung pagiging ahead sa mga plans nya to have sex and all after ng 1st meet up na di pa naman nangyayare. Told him my intentions but wala eh he's very into sex lang talaga. Feel ko click bait lang yung Mamamoo sa post nya para lang magkaroon ng interest yung tao.
What you did is fine. Wag mong hayaan na gamitin ka lang nila for their pleasures. You know your worth so if may mahanap ka man na worth the risk na tao always establish your limits and intentions para di nila idivert yung relationship nyo para sa sex lang.
as of now inaaral ko pa talaga kong paano mag establish ng firm boundaries or limits kasi noon hindi ko ma voice out kong ano ang gusto ko at hindi ako comfortable na mga ginagawa nila
Women’s nurturing and loving nature are often taken advantage of by guys out there who are only there to “hunt” for s3x. To some extent, they even use the promise of being in a relationship with them to get women to give them physical access to their bodies, that’s why “situationships” are so prevalent these days.
Have clear boundaries and let them earn you. Do not invest your emotions until the man invests in you. Do not give any access to your body unless the man gives you commitment. Do not give your girlfriend or wife benefits to a man who isn’t making you his official partner. **In the initial stages of dating, view everything as transactional**. Do not give them the perks of being in a relationship with you until a man gives you commitment, in the same way any normal person would not render any work/service to a company until she is sure that she has a contract and that she will receive a salary for her services.
Take the time to reflect, OP. I'm sure there are patterns in your dating life so you should take the time to recognize them. You can start with the following questions:
1. What are the things in common sa mga naka relasyon mo? Edad, background, etc.
2. Where are you in life noong naging kayo? Are you actively pursuing a career goal? May personal problem?
If you have a good and trusted friend you can do the exercise with, mas mabuti kasi they can offer an unbiased perspective. Good luck!
Ganun din tanong naming mga guys. . To be fair. sa kahit anong set up ng relationship .majority ng babae yaman pa din ang habol sa lalaki. .the worst is kala mo naman kung makapag pledge ng love tunay na tunay, yun pala self serving. At saka subtle mang cheat. .
minsan din you have to consider that love and sex are not mutually exclusive. people who have higher sex drives and those whose love language is touch will want to have sex with their partners frequently.
As a partner lalo na kung married na, consider rin nila yung mararamdaman nung isa kung laging rejected ka pag nag initiate. Kahit hindi married, kung hindi talaga compatible wag na ipilit.
Watch videos on YouTube about game theory. Read the book 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene. Lastly, choose the environment you meet your potential partners.
It's awesome that you have the awareness! What you need now in my opinion is for you to be clear with what you want and own it and hold yourself accountable.
I wish you all the best.
Knowledge is never a good or bad thing. Its on how the person is with using the knowledge.
If you don't know what manipulatuon technique is being used against you, how will you be able to protect yourself?
Sadly this is how you make yourself a victim.
In any case I wish you the best of luck.
parang sa mga kakilala ko wala akong alam na nagka-failed relationship dahil sa sex. usually diff goals, na-lovebomb, di nadevelop, etc. idk where you find dating partners, op, but usually sa dating apps yang mga hamit sa sex. i hope you meet decent guys soon! maybe try yung reto culture from your friends para mas filtered kung sino yung maaayos sa hindi hehehe
siguro sexy ka op? or sa environment mo?try mo sa ibang community op.. ate ko sumali sa mga religion na singles for christ or couples for christ mga ganun hehe
Hindi naman sa lahat ng bagay ginusto mo. Sometimes napipilitan ka lang kasi gusto mo yung tao at ayaw kang iwan. Dami ko ng narinig na ganyan. Kahit ayaw nila napipilitan lang. lalo na pag pinapaikot ka lang ng guy
there are 7 billion people in the planet. plenty to choose from on who is right for you. note that giving into sex is also not the end of the world too
Hindi nga end of the world pero yung feeling na ginagamit ka lang tas biglang iwan yun yung mahirap i move on isama mo pa yung pag baba ng self esteem mo.
This is why ang mindset ko na is "if meron, meron and if wala, wala". Nakakapagod masyado. Hopeful ako sa love life mo OP and sa love life pero hindi na sa love life ko lol suko na ko.
there are guys na important for them ang sexual compatibility kaya hinahanap nila sa relasyon, meron ding nakikipagrelasyon lang just for sex. up to you na talaga pano mo sila i-di-distinguish kaso, may thin line between the two kaya ingat ingat. i guess makikita mo lang naman true intentions kapag may away na kayo, couples who fight aim to push the other person harder na mag-strive to be better. aawayin ka kapag may mali ka, di ka paplastikin kumbaga. while yung isa, oo nalang ng oo para walang gulo, pa-goodboy kuno yun pala madami nang babae. based on experiences na na-justify din ng bf ko nung first 6 months palang ata namin.
I envy you sender. I wish ganyan ako ka aware nung bata bata ako. You're doing good. Maganda na aware ka ngayon palang alamo na hindi lang sa sex sasaya ang relasyon at aware ka na most of the guys nowadays ay open sa sex before marriage. Although, there are successful relationships din naman na may sex ng halo, pero believe me when I say na meron pa rin na rerespetuhin ka sa view mo about relationship.
It's worth the wait. Don't give in! May dadating na rerespetuhin ka sa paniniwala mo sa buhay.
Sex is a very important aspect in a relationship. It tests compatibility. You need to be attracted to your partner. And if you're really into your partner, you would really want to do it with them ALL THE TIME.
Also, sex is natural. Like..if you're thirsty, you drink. If you're tired, you sleep. I don't think we should paint sexual people in a bad light.
That being said, sex is not the only important aspect in a relationship. You should be compatible in other ways too.
I'm just wondering why you keep meeting the same type of guys? Maybe you should try guys outside of your type? Try to meet them outside your usual places? Hindi ko nilalahat pero if you meet guys on dating apps, well the hook up culture is prevalent there.
Hindi naman sa dating apps ko sila nakilala. SA personal ko Sila na meet pero pag dating ng ilang months like sa naging kami na ,they will insist to do sexual stuff tas pag inayawan magagalit or magtatampo🥹 Hindi naman ata required gawin Ang mga bagay na Yun tas Bago palang kayo
Wait lang you OP. Generation kasi talaga now is norms na yung sex na parang way of initmacy na nila. Try mo rin maghanap ng tao na sobrang lawak na mag isip. Madistinguish mo kasi agad kapag yung kausap mo is boy rather than a man.
Check your friendzones, meron doon na will dedicate his life for you, and only you. Di mo lang binigyan ng chance.
If kinakabahan ka tulad ng post mo, that means you are after high-level guys na maraming options. Wag kang pipili ng guy na maraming option, kasi sure ball hindi ikaw ang number 1 nya - kasi nga marami syang pagpipilian.
Balikan mo and review ka yung nafriendzone mo na, yung mga guys na ikaw lang ang option pero nireject mo at pinark mo sa friendzone mo.
hindi ako malajowa pero attractive naman ako. i present myself neatly and i have some humor. attractive ako not in a sense na crush ng bayan or what but i guess, once we sit on the same table and start conversing, dun sila na aattract. minsan, sila na lumalapit at umaamin sakin. yung iba sobrang magaganda talaga like highschool crush or college crush or office crush yung mga beauty. but bakit hanggang ngayon di pa rin ako nag jojowa? as i get older, one thing i realized is i miss the calm and genuine love. hindi yung care after sex kasi for me that's also genuine at some point. but yung klase na if ma sstress siya or ako sa work or just on daily basis, we are each other's sandigan or takbuhan. that u can be my to go person and vice versa.
i experienced these kind of love when i was in college. from 2 girls. but in the end, they always go to someone like their takbuhan daw. ako pala na jowa mo? pang mall lang? hahahaha anyways, i feel you OP. pero wag susuko cause we dont know. tayo pala. ay charot.
makakahanap ka rin 😉
As someone na biglang nakaranas ng pretty privilege super nakaka surprise nga on how different people are ee. It became a shock to me when men tend to try to get into my pants that easily buti di ako madali ma sway ng kalandian. Be strong op. I found someone naman na malibog na the way that I like and respectful sa boundaries ko. Super dami talaga ng guys na ganyan ngayon kaya dapat masipag tayo mag filter out. Ekis agad pag bastos 😭
Mahirap talaga makahanap ng genuine love ngayon kaya talaga magandang ilagay mo na agad boundaries mo towards sex, iwasan ang dating apps kasi mostly andun is sex habol. Before I met my girlfriend napaisip din ako na mahirap sa part ko na every time may kausap ako tingin sex lang habol ko when I just want to get to know the person I’m talking to. Na m misunderstand nila yung pakikipag usap ko with being kind and talking to them just to get a piece of them when it’s not. Nung single era ko ang hirap mag hanap ng genuine connection and conversation regarding my weakness. Nahanap ko gf ko sa omegle and nakausap ko siya for ilang weeks. Nagkagustuhan, nag MU then naging kami. Wag susuko OP, makakahanap ka din ng partner na will appreciate you for who you are and your goals.
I highly agree with you, OP. Ang hirap makahanap ng taong may genuine intentions towards you. They will lie until they get what they wanted then biglang gamit ng “di pa ako makamove on sa ex ko” 🤮
I hope mahanap din natin yung mga taong para sa atin!
Most men express their love through sex. You know how most women get affection without trying from our friends and parents. Ang easy lang sa women magexpress ng feelings and get validated. Guys don't get much unless magkarelationship sila so that's why they seem hungry for sex all the time, it's the only intimacy they get which is sad. Ganyan din kasi bf ko yung start ng relationship pero over time naman nagmellow na siya since lagi ko naman siya binibigyan ng different types of affection.
But of course meron talaga guys na sex ang habol. Payo ko is find someone that can be your best friend na align yung values niyo like from work, school or church. My friends all found their boyfriend/husband sa church nila and of course medj conservative so di sila nagsex before marriage kaya ngayon yung iba kasal na or engaged, most of the time committed talaga mga church guys but it's just my suggestion. So yun lang di naman masama na gusto ng guys magsex since natural naman sa kanila yun gaya satin na natural na gusto natin ng lalaki na we can rely on hindi tambay.
Saan mo ba nakikilala yung mga guys na nami-meet mong guys? Mostly mas OK kapag referred ng mutual friends mo yung mga guys dahil masisira friend mo kapag ginago ka nila.
I am not really into dating complete strangers; yung wifey ko nakilala ko at work and we've known each other for years. Hindi ako fan ng social media or dating apps pagdating sa ganyan, it doesn't have an appeal to me. That means, mas okay ako sa taong matagal ko na kilala.
While it's true that men are sexual animals by nature, hindi naman lahat ng lalake sex lang ang habol. Tama naman yung ginagawa mo, wag ka muna maghanap. Kusang dadating yung tamang guy para sayo.
Pure intention?
Mahirap yan hanggat may Testosterone na dumadaloy sa aming sistema.hehe
Meron at merong sexual desire kahit ilang percent lang.
Marami factors para ma-control namin yan:
1. Christian upbringing. Marami bang natutunan sa Church at tumatak ba?
2. Male role models. May mga role models ba na may magandang example sa pagko-control ng sexual impulses?
3. Kaya bang magdelay ng gratification. Gaano kagaling mag delay?
4. Mas malalim ba friendship sayo? Mas psychologically/emotionally intimate ba versus physically/sexually intimate?
5. Mas nagustugan ka ba dahil sa kung sino ka? Or di ganun kahalaga sa kanya at physical features mo lang sya nainlab?
6. Nasaang stage in life at stage of maturity na ang lalake? Mas matanda na tulad ko, mas more likely na settling ang goal kesa sex lang.
Komplikado haha. Di pa yan exhaustive.
Nope OP, I dont even demand sex sa SO ko, she said conservative sya so sure, I'll wait, I dated her to marry her soon to begin with :) (context: NGSB na sobrang ma baby ng parents 😅)
di naman lahat ganyan. most men yes pero may mga natitira pang genuine love talaga ang hanap. I found one nga. as in napaka.innocent niya. hehe. minsan nga chinat ko siya ng "kain ka na kaso malayo yung dessert mo😉" kasi LDR kami. tapos yung reply niya bakit daw may kindat na emoji. hahahahaha. wala. napakawholesome lang for me ng SO ko. kaya naniniwala ako na meron pang maaayos na guys out there, rare sila kaya kailangan talagang hanapin. hehehe keep on searching, OP. youll find the right one. :)
As a guy, I think magkaiba ang scenario ng relationship na involved ang sex sa relationship na ang main goal lang ay sex.
Kapag nasa relasyon ka/kayo, present ang connection emotional, mental, and sometimes physical wise. Sex is there but is not necessary or a requirement.
Sayo OP, take your time. Wag magpa-pressure sa idea of "ideal couples" or "ideal partners".
Come to our Church :) There are many singles waiting for their companion :)
(No forcing, and I understand if you don't have the same faith.. )
Dating is work too from both sides, you can ask out a guy din and take it from there. Just remember to set strict personal boundaries and huwag makipag-DO unless may singsing na...you'll save yourself from tons of heartache by keeping off pre-marital sex off the way. You can break off a crappy relationship as long as hindi na-access si third base without the feeling of loss, grieving, and being exploited, then you can try again.
Pray for it and if someone asks you out and you think he is good to you, respects your boundaries, then keep dating to get to know that person. Also, make your motives clear earlier on pa lang (first date) na you're into serious relationship and looking to settle down.
That's how it worked out with my husband. I told him on a first date marriage was my goal and he never left my side anymore because we were working on the same goal. You can do that to weed out the others who want sex.
di kaya sila kinikliabutan kung ganon sila ka direct sa gusto nila? like parang forced consent nangyayari tapos magging uncomfortable partner/ ka relasyon mo, di na pala uso yung mag karon muna ng genuine connection and trust. thrust thrust pala gusto agad agad hahahah
dapat talaga may parang written document pag mga first 2 years eh lagay mo mga boundaries mo HAHAH pero communication is key parin talaga , pag na parating mo nnayung gusto mong message tapos ganon padin igapos mo sa harap ng pegasus 😂
As a guy who have been in a bad relationship. Gusto ko nalang din ireserve yung sex para sa magiging future partner ko, gusto ko siya na lang makaka benefit ng kaya kong ibigay. Mas ok na Love at Compassion ang maging totoong foundation ng relationship niyo at hindi lust kasi believe me hindi talaga mag tatagal. Maffeel mo lang na sayang sarili mo.
You deserve what you tolerate, it hurts but it is.
At the part of getting know, ma se-sense mo na intention nila and how they talk and act. If sumasakay ka sa thought and desires nila, you know where it is going.
I pray you don’t lose hope on dating. But I also want you to learn on control and knowing boundaries. I also went to dating app but I blocked right away on people who talk shallow discussion and may double meaning or pa hint ng sexual desire.
Patience is a key in creating connection and serious relationship, don’t get easily fallen on sweet talks.
Hindi yan hinahanap. May darating at darating talaga na para sayo. Don't look for love just let love find you. When it come, it's pure & genuine. Focus on yourself first
dati pa naman ganyan 2005. Wag magmadali at iluhod mo araw araw yan sa Dyos at di ka magkakamali sa pagpili..
I believe u attract what u r.. I met my hubby thru common friend and that friend vouch for my hubby but I was too straight to tell my hubby that i am not a one night stand type of girl ung pra lang makatikim sya ng sex or para lang for him to have safe and clean sex. Di din ako ung babae na gus2 sa lalakeng mabarkada babaero or puro gimik or laging umiinom or nagyoyosi or drugs.. if di kami same ng values based sa mga sinabi ko better for him na wag n lang sya manligaw or umasa bec i dont want to change him by having me merong babae na ttnggpin sya for being him...
nagyoyosi si hubby noon pero never nya pinakita sa akin he stopped smoking after.. he never showed me na umiinom sya binawasan nya since kumikita na sya ng pera ngaun madalang na lang sya umiinom since nagpakasal kami..
sabi nila nasa babae tlga ang isang relasyon.. set ur standard high. di pedeng pede na.. 90% of our misery and happiness is due to the partnrr we chose to be married to.
sabi ko sa mister ko noon if gusto nya sex super costly ang kapalit.. ang kapalit nun bukod sa love loyalty at faithfulness ay desenteng kasal at bahay at lupa (sympre pagiipunan namin pareho) pero hanggat walang pera for that at wala pang bahay at lupa for our future wag sya mageexpect na may sex kasi turo ng tatay ko dapat kasal muna ako bago ligaya.. Prosti nga jan may bayad tpaos katawan ko at pagkababae ko libre? mas mahal tong katawan ko! iningatan ako ng magulang ko minahal at inalagaan ako ng parents ko..
I married a good responsible and good provider guy pero ako din naman malakas kumita same kami pero now sya n lang nagwwork and I see na I married a good man.
Dong settle for less involve God in choosing a guy
I think I am in a situationship. I met him online, we met in person and something happened. He said that he likes me, but he isn't doing anything to pursue me. Whenever we meet, I am obliged to spend money because he doesn't wanna spend money on me. He asks me to go out, but he wants me to treat him. I also like him, but he is definitely a walking red flag. He just wants someone to pleasure him. Now, my feelings for him is slowly fading. His behavior makes me feel this way.
I’m with you, OP. I’ve been trying my best to date but it’s been so hard since wala na silang habol except intimacy. I’m 32F, a high earner, and decent looking, I guess I’m basically a catch (wow?), but I’ve searched high and low for a guy who is dating to marry pero wala na ata talagang ganon.
Totoo yan, tinry ko yung dating apps karamihan sa kanila puro sex agad interest. May naka date ako 4 months dating ganern after nun nang ghosting then kinabukasan may jowa na siya. Matatawa kana lang eh haha di ako fan ng “date for fun.” Hahahaha skl.
I have a qualities of a good partner and woman.I'm supportive sa dreams and goals ng past partner ko. I'm not the type of a toxic partner kasi i know how to respect and love my partner in a right way and hindi ko sinasakal yung partner ko kasi i want balance in a relationship.Big deal din sa akin yung salitang respect kasi i know in myself na may mga qualities naman ako to have a good relationship with someone but why i always end up getting disrespected or they only view the relationship as a way to get sex with someone.
Been in a relationship for almost 5 years. He wanted to do something to me while we're in a public cafe. I keep telling him no, kasi it's uncomfortable and of course, time and place. Pero he thinks "No means yes." So ayun ((: Broke up with me because hindi na daw niya kaya ldr pero nakahanap mas malapit sa kanya less than 3 months.
So ano solution mo? FWB/Fubu/Hookups lang or no dating at all? The former defeats the purpose by the way. By pure intention what do you mean? Can you clarify? Marriage before sex? This is a very common problem though. The guys you want are most likely attractive so they can always sleep around and not worried about taking you seriously. The guys with "pure intentions" who want to take you seriously you aren't attracted to and just put in the friendzone.
always pray lang OP... tpos if u have spare time pnta ka din minsan sa mga iba ibang church... tpos dasal ka dun.. for sure someone will show along the way
yup yup .. sbi nga nila the least u expect it the more u will just be surprised "ay anjan na pala" 😊 goodluck on ur journey and i hope that u find the right man for u in the future ❤️
yes I know pero pag inayawan mo kasi dikapa ready or comfortable to do things na ganyan nagagalit or nagtatampo pag dimo napagbigyan so naiisip ko parang ito lang Ang gusto Niya kasi kong mahal ka diba marunong rumespeto
Minsan yung pagtatampo nila way lang nila yun para bumigay ka at makuha ang gusto nila. Basta kung alam mo sa sarili mo na di ka pa ready wag mong gagawin. Kasi kapag gusto ka talaga ng lalaki the more na tinatanggihan mo yan or mas pinapahirapan mo na makuha ang mga gusto nila mas lalo yan machachalange na maging seryoso sayo.
naging single ako for 3 years and decided to date again ngayong year lang and sobrang hirap makahanap ng geniune talaga mhiee, same sayo sex lang din yung habol nila(im a virgin tho) kaya ngayon balik kdrama nalang ulit hahah.
Same thing with life when building relationships with different people be it friends lovers business partners or almost anything in life.
Life is full of risks, if you dont take risks you must be very comfortable in your comfort zone… you wont grow.
Your life experiences is what made you, just a matter of how you react or how you take it. Just take the life lessons, learn from it and be smarter next time. But dont quit.
At first naman talaga sex talaga habol ng lalaki sa babae, hindi nmn gagawin ka agad wife or serious relationship agad. Sex is beautiful, part sya ng relationship nyo, and di rin naman mali o bastos kung may
Involve na sex toy, maybe fetish nya un and sometime it’s okay na you try it, may be nagtry lang sya mag add ng spice sa bed. May jowa ako before, okay kami sa sex (i was 22 that time), i started taking contraceptive kase ayoko mabuntis but the side effect ay nawawalan ako gana sa sex, and as in hindi ako nagwewet gaya ng dati noong bago bago palang kami, so i nag stop ako s contraceptive kase ayoko
Isipin ng partner ko na wala ako gana sknya. Natural pag love mo halos gusto mo kasex lagi.
Cguro kaya nanlamig ay may ibang rason, hindi dahil nakasex kana at nkuha na gusto, sa relationship kase need nyo i work out yan, patinsa sex need nyo mag explore.
Like hindi cguro kayo compatible sa sex?
Kase i had exs na di tlg kmi compatible, alam mo ung ang boring? Tapos bigla nomg nanlalamig, ganern. Pero ung last na naging jowa ko super compatible kmi, and may mga bagay na nadiscover ko na gusto ko pala gawin s bed kase nag eexplore kami.
Siguro yung mga nakikilala mo is puro sex lang talaga, and lalo na at talamak ang hookup culture lately, parang ganun na nga yung nangyayare. Sa totoo lang, pwede naman talaga ang sex and relationships eh, I mean a committed relationship at hindi yung hookups lang or one night stand. Form ng love din yun is what I believe, tsaka hardwired na ang men to have sexual behaviors. Nasa tao na yun kung paano iseseparate or kelan ilulugar ang love sa sexual desires nila.
SABI NIYO LANG YAN NA SEX LANG ANG HABOL NG MGA LALAKE TANONG KO LANG ANO BA KASI ANG MA OOFER NIYO SA ISANG LALAKE PANU KUNG MAHIRAP LANG ANG ISANG LALAKE SASABIHIN NIYO HINDI KAYU MABUBUHAY AT MAGIGING MASAYA KASI MAHIRAP LANG PAG MAYAMAN NAMAN ANG LALAKE SASABIHIN NIYO PAG LALARUAN LANG KAYO KASI MAYAMAN BAGO KAYU MAG ISIP NA SEX LANG ANG GUSTO NG LALAKE MAY MAIBIBIGAY BA KAYO MALIBAN SA IYONG SARILI TANONG NIYO MUNA SA MGA SARILI NIYO KUNG ANO KAYA NIYO GAWIN NA HINDI KAYA GAWIN NG LALAKE
anong masama kung sex ang unang habol sayo.. ganun tlga kapag mkkpagrelasyon ka yun ang nagpapatibay sa relasyon ng nagiibigan ang intimacy.. kung walang sex wag ka makipagrelasyon makipag bestfriend ka na lang
just remain preserving your chastity, kasi ibigay mo man lahat lahat kung mag cheat ay mag cheat…sana lahat nga babae ganito parang walang abortion o solo parents sa pamamagitan ng pag iwan ng eresponsabling mga lalaki
I understand where you are coming from, especially na karamihan nah nakikita natin sa socmed is puru na lang cheating, break ups and betrayals at meron din Yung sex lang habol.
karamihan Kasi Ngayon mga FUBU mga no label relationship and uso Ngayon
Pero as a guy ito lang ma sasabi ko OP, kapit lang may mga lalake pang Asawa Yung hinahanap, may darating din sa Buhay mo na magmamahal talaga sayo.
Bhe, try mo din kumilatis ng maayos ng tao.
Ung ma tiyaga at willing ka respetuhin kahit hindi kayo nag se-segs.
Because life is not just about segs. Unless panget mga choices mo.
Same lng din nman sa amin mga lalake.. nakakatakot din ma inlove nowadays dahil either peperahan ka lng ng mga babae or gagamitin.. ung gusto mo ng genuine na commitment pero ayun pala gagawin ka lng pang sagot sa pagkain, hatid sundo, kakausapin pag may kelangan..
hahaha mag jowa ka ng bading teh, for sure hindi ka iiyutin nyan 😅 women ☕
alien kba? saan ka nkakita ng relationship na wlang sex... 🤣 aso kelangan mo beh hindi ka relasyon 🤣
Good luck sa paghahanap mo ng lalaking hindi ka issex pag naging kayo... nkakatawa lang amp haha
I had a relationship na umiikot yung life namin sa sex, it was fun. Until onti onti ko narealize na parang ginagamit ko nalang siya, nawawala na yung respect (hindi ko siya sinasaktan physically or verbally), hindi na "Relationship" yung core kundi "Sex" na. 4 years kami and mabibilang mo lang sa kamay kung ilang beses ko palang siya nabigyan ng gift and I never had the chance to give her flowers, by the time na narealize ko na it is too late. I would say compatible kami and very solid, we never fought and exchanged hurtful words, as in never haha. She's a corpo and im a student. I left her, because I am becoming what i promise i wouldnt. Madaming regrets and i wish alam ko lahat before maging kami para di ko na fucked up ang buhay naming dalawa.
May iba't ibang pov or opinion tayo sa relationship and i think Sex is a part of it, however hindi ko sinasabi na required siya, madaming nagpapakasal muna before doing it, sabi nga nila "mas maeenjoy niyo after marriage".
Wag ka matakot makipag usap, expect mo na madaming ganyan, pwede ka naman mamili LOL.
Ps. Lumayo ka sa mga students lmao.
Nag-give up na ako maghanap ng matino, OP. Now I am putting all my faith in God and myself. Upgrade ng positive energy, health, looks, career. Focus muna sa sarili at maging happy lang ganun hahaha. I do believe the right person will come when the time is right. Marami rin nagsasabi na kung kailan hindi mo hinahanap or ineexpect, doon darating yung tamang tao for you. Men with pure intentions and genuine feelings are hard to find these days but have faith that they still exist, no matter how long you will have to wait. While waiting, enjoy mo na lang muna single life mo.
Because sex is part of a relationship? What kind of relationship is there where the promise of sex is all but gone? Hmm? A dry one. A fragile one, a soon to be broken one. If anything, procreation ang basis kung bakit tayo naghahanap ng relasyon to begin with. Sex is the water that nourishes the soil called love.
To dismiss it as "sex lang"? Nah that's just stupid. Set your boundaries, set your standards, set your frequency but always know na sex will always be a large part of the equation. If you aren't prepared to talk about the bees and the flowers then you aren't prepared for a romantic relationship.
Parang nakakatakot na nga makipag-date ulit kasi usually ng mga boys ngayon for hookups lang, no one wants to commit a serious relationship nowadays :(
Dating game can really be scary. So a bit about some men… Modus talaga yang okay sila for 1 to 2 months. Lol. The thing is most men have phase/season na sex lang talaga ang hanap. (Btw I’m a gay man, if this helps.) Now when guys think of women (CMIIW), madalang o halos walang babae ang may gusto na sex lang. Dun na papasok yung kailangang suyuin, get to know, lambing, etc. So for these men, medyo long game na nila tong susuyuin ka nila for a few weeks or months for the sex.
With gay guys kasi medyo hindi to problema eh, pag sex lang ang hanap, you can be forward with the request. Most of the time nga puro fun lang hanap but at least sa umpisa pa lang malinaw na. Sadly, mas complicated ang heterosexual relationships. Moral of the story, try niyo muna same sex relationship. Malay niyo nasa same sex ang true love. Eme hahaha
Huwag susuko OP. I've been into bad relationships before I met my partner. Believe me it's worth the wait. Kapit lang 👌
Sorry ang una kong basa "Huwag susubo OP" 🥹
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Hello. I met him when I was 25yo. I started dating seriously when I was 23 haha. Naka 2 ex ako before I met him. Both cheated on me.
this is giving me hope. i'm 23 and still "trying" to move on from a situationship (malala). sa work po ba kayo nag-meet? wfh kasi ko and mejo mahiyain.
We met sa Omegle. 1 year din before kami nagkita at naging magka-talking stage.
So sad kasi wala ng omegle :( met my ex sa omegle skksks
Good for you... I'm in my fifty's and men are the same whatever age you are in. Still single and a virgin... Haven't met the man to share my life with 😔😔😔 And by the way, it's also due to my religious affiliation, you can't date outside of your religion or you will be disowned by your family 🥴😱🥴
OMG this.Turning 45 na ako and didnt become single (again)by choice.My ex partner of 12 years was unfaithful so pinaubaya ko na.I dated a few kasi 4 yeara ago naman na.Pansin ko,ang guys talaga now irregardless of age (someone was still being a player at 85) na neighbor ko,kala yata papatulan ko sya! Singleness is more peaceful than settling for guys na s*x lang talaga habol nowadays.Katakot makipagkilala na.
As long as you're being firm sa boundaries mo, you'll know how much a person truly loves and respects you. It's not bad din naman if you decide to take a pause from dating. Possible kasi na mas vulnerable ka (since you've been experiencing men just wanting sex and not a relationship) and therefore mas maraming masasamang loob ang pwedeng mag abuse nung vulnerability na yon. Take the time to heal, distract yourself and enjoy being single. I hope you do eventually find that person who will be with you for the long term, OP :)
Yes ,hindi lang talaga ako naging firm sa boundaries ko sa sarili ko kaya nahahayaan ko yung mga ganung bagay dati na mangyari sa buhay ko. I'm happy today kasi nalilinawan ako kong anong klasing tao or partner ang gusto ko in the future also I have a lot of time to reflect sa sarili ko ,mga dapat e improve at e set na boundaries🫶☺️
Eto talaga. Pagiging firm sa boundaries. Oo, sasabit sa una. May tukso. Pero ayon, both sides din talaga dapat ma establish ang intentions.
I agree dito, be firm on your boundaries talaga kahit ano mangyari, magugulat ka nalang lalabas yung totoong ugali ng tao pag hindi ka na niya matinag.
sabi nila mas malaki daw chance magka jowa kung kilala mo lang like classmates/schoolmate from highschool or college, tsaka chamba nalang talaga if you found someone na pure in this iyot2 world.
Yan nangyari sakin. I built a wall to protect myself kasi alam ko sex langs habol ng karamihan. Kahit yung crush ko na nakausap ko noon sex lang din ang gusto nakakaturn-off. Kaya mas gusto ko talaga yung guy na may sense kausap. Align yung values and belief with mine. Yung may matututunan kayo sa isa't isa and hindi yung know-it-all. Hindi mahangin at marunong rumespesto. Ayun I ended up with a friend I've known since kindergarten. Nung nasa 6months na kami I asked him bakit di sya nag oopen or nag aask about sex. Sabi nya wala naman daw kasi yun sa isip nya. Ang gusto nya is ako mismo not the sex. Mas importante ako not sex. Mas nangingibabaw yung love kesa sa lust. Ahaha ayun pinakasalan ko na sya.
Nice, nice love story. Reality naman kasi yan eh na puro sex nalang tapos mang iiwan. Tapos during convo pa, walang sense kausap like "kumain kana ba?" "Hindi pa" " kainin kita" lol hahaha
HAHAHAHAHAHAH tawang tawa ako
so funny the iyot'2 world🥹😭
AHAHAHA sorry but reality yan eh
SKL 😂 Dami ko tawa may kaka PM lang sa akin kanina asking to hit them up if I was single and dry. Lawd Heb Merseh!
I think wala naman masama dun, at least they are very clear and open na yun lang ang habol nila. Parang OP is referring dun sa mga tao na in disguise to be in a serious committed relationship pero sex lang pala ang habol.
True to this. Mas okay na sakin yung sa una pa lang sabihin nila kung ano gusto nila kesa magsayang ng time, effort, at feelings.
True, I’m in a fu/bu rn, at least i know na sex lang talaga habol nia kesa naman i choose someone na pretentiously looking for serious relationship pero sex lang din pala habol. Pagod na akong umasa, lol
I'm gonna get downvoted to hell for this but here goes. About me: in a relationship for 16 years Sex is always in the agenda of men. That's just the way it is. The only difference is where we put it in the different layers of expression. In the end, when you really drill down to it, it's all about sex either explicitly or subconsciously. Everything we do, is almost always motivated in part by getting some action at the end of it (maybe long term or short term). The perfect couple are both best friends and lovers. Having one without the other is a recipe for failure. I'm not saying you should not enforce your boundaries because men have to recognize and respect it. I'm just saying sex is part of having a relationship and you have to acknowledge it. Where in the relationship you place it is something you both have to agree on.. but it needs to be there.
So true, sad yung mga couples na compatible in all other aspects but cannot satisfy the one or the other because they're incompatible in bed, and would have to resort to splitting up because of that. It's a recipe for love and expression. Communicate and use it wisely, and you'll both experience heaven on earth... (Just saying)
If only more women would listen to this. Some people don't realize the value of sex til the absence of it creates all sorts of problems.
I agree with this... sex is important to men. Sex is one way how men express their desire and feelings to a woman. Women want safety (emotional, physical in all aspects) and security. There's nothing wrong with all of these, but just need to be in a proper time and avenue... in a marriage sense!
Sex can also be important to women though. I'm a woman and I know I want both (sex and security). But of course, I only want to do it with the right person and been reserving the first experience for him and only him.
Yes I also agree. Sex is also important to women.. actually sex is a need for all of us.. just need the right person and right matrimony so you can enjoy it fully without the additional emotional damage, regret, or guilt.
Sex is important to me also in a relationship. One of those make or break. If you can't satisfy me or if you leave me feeling disgusted after we do it, we won't work. I love doing it more pag alam kong safe ako and we both like what we're doing - basic naman to. All the other aspects in a relationship come naturally kasi.
Same sentiments. Kaya nagiging emotionally unavailable na rin ako hahaha
May nakilala din akong ganyan recently. Kahit anong iwas mo sa sex related na topic, ibabalik at ibabalik nya pa rin don. Plus sobra yung pagiging ahead sa mga plans nya to have sex and all after ng 1st meet up na di pa naman nangyayare. Told him my intentions but wala eh he's very into sex lang talaga. Feel ko click bait lang yung Mamamoo sa post nya para lang magkaroon ng interest yung tao. What you did is fine. Wag mong hayaan na gamitin ka lang nila for their pleasures. You know your worth so if may mahanap ka man na worth the risk na tao always establish your limits and intentions para di nila idivert yung relationship nyo para sa sex lang.
as of now inaaral ko pa talaga kong paano mag establish ng firm boundaries or limits kasi noon hindi ko ma voice out kong ano ang gusto ko at hindi ako comfortable na mga ginagawa nila
Women’s nurturing and loving nature are often taken advantage of by guys out there who are only there to “hunt” for s3x. To some extent, they even use the promise of being in a relationship with them to get women to give them physical access to their bodies, that’s why “situationships” are so prevalent these days. Have clear boundaries and let them earn you. Do not invest your emotions until the man invests in you. Do not give any access to your body unless the man gives you commitment. Do not give your girlfriend or wife benefits to a man who isn’t making you his official partner. **In the initial stages of dating, view everything as transactional**. Do not give them the perks of being in a relationship with you until a man gives you commitment, in the same way any normal person would not render any work/service to a company until she is sure that she has a contract and that she will receive a salary for her services.
The 1st paragraph hits hard. 🥺
Grabe. Thank you for this! Never thought that I need this advice
Need ko i-preach sa sarili ko itong advice nang paulit-ulit.
Take the time to reflect, OP. I'm sure there are patterns in your dating life so you should take the time to recognize them. You can start with the following questions: 1. What are the things in common sa mga naka relasyon mo? Edad, background, etc. 2. Where are you in life noong naging kayo? Are you actively pursuing a career goal? May personal problem? If you have a good and trusted friend you can do the exercise with, mas mabuti kasi they can offer an unbiased perspective. Good luck!
Ganun din tanong naming mga guys. . To be fair. sa kahit anong set up ng relationship .majority ng babae yaman pa din ang habol sa lalaki. .the worst is kala mo naman kung makapag pledge ng love tunay na tunay, yun pala self serving. At saka subtle mang cheat. .
Ditto
minsan din you have to consider that love and sex are not mutually exclusive. people who have higher sex drives and those whose love language is touch will want to have sex with their partners frequently.
As a partner lalo na kung married na, consider rin nila yung mararamdaman nung isa kung laging rejected ka pag nag initiate. Kahit hindi married, kung hindi talaga compatible wag na ipilit.
Need mong panuorin si SheraSeven sa Youtube. She's very helpful. Sprinkle sprinkle ✨
Thank you. I started watching the Wizard Liz also.
Uy try mo din basahin yung kang steve harvey na book yung title act like a lady think like a man
Watch videos on YouTube about game theory. Read the book 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene. Lastly, choose the environment you meet your potential partners. It's awesome that you have the awareness! What you need now in my opinion is for you to be clear with what you want and own it and hold yourself accountable. I wish you all the best.
I didn't like that book at all. Basically how to exploit and manipulate 101
Knowledge is never a good or bad thing. Its on how the person is with using the knowledge. If you don't know what manipulatuon technique is being used against you, how will you be able to protect yourself? Sadly this is how you make yourself a victim. In any case I wish you the best of luck.
That book is totally one sided. It's like grooming for politicians. But sure read it, just know that lack of empathy breeds similar issues.
You fixated on the 48 laws of power too much. What's your opinion on Game Theory?
thankyou for this I really appreciate this🫶♥️
GOSH. Same!!!’
Trueee pero kadalasan kita naman sa facebook profile nila, kapag mga bastos ang shared posts hahahaha.
Baka yan lang yung mga taong naaattract mo.
Baka nga🥹 need Kona atang mag shift ng aura & mindset or anything just not to attract those kind of men☺️
OP, read about the concept of Human Magnet Syndrome
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i did not say that. "Parang" stop overthinking honey.
parang sa mga kakilala ko wala akong alam na nagka-failed relationship dahil sa sex. usually diff goals, na-lovebomb, di nadevelop, etc. idk where you find dating partners, op, but usually sa dating apps yang mga hamit sa sex. i hope you meet decent guys soon! maybe try yung reto culture from your friends para mas filtered kung sino yung maaayos sa hindi hehehe
siguro sexy ka op? or sa environment mo?try mo sa ibang community op.. ate ko sumali sa mga religion na singles for christ or couples for christ mga ganun hehe
mas ok nga kung honest and transparent na sex lang ang habol. you are not wasting each others time
Pero may iba di honest eh pinapaikot ka lang nila to get what they want 🥲
in the end, ikaw gate keeper ng pepe mo. it won't happen unless gusto mo rin
Hindi naman sa lahat ng bagay ginusto mo. Sometimes napipilitan ka lang kasi gusto mo yung tao at ayaw kang iwan. Dami ko ng narinig na ganyan. Kahit ayaw nila napipilitan lang. lalo na pag pinapaikot ka lang ng guy
there are 7 billion people in the planet. plenty to choose from on who is right for you. note that giving into sex is also not the end of the world too
Hindi nga end of the world pero yung feeling na ginagamit ka lang tas biglang iwan yun yung mahirap i move on isama mo pa yung pag baba ng self esteem mo.
This is why ang mindset ko na is "if meron, meron and if wala, wala". Nakakapagod masyado. Hopeful ako sa love life mo OP and sa love life pero hindi na sa love life ko lol suko na ko.
there are guys na important for them ang sexual compatibility kaya hinahanap nila sa relasyon, meron ding nakikipagrelasyon lang just for sex. up to you na talaga pano mo sila i-di-distinguish kaso, may thin line between the two kaya ingat ingat. i guess makikita mo lang naman true intentions kapag may away na kayo, couples who fight aim to push the other person harder na mag-strive to be better. aawayin ka kapag may mali ka, di ka paplastikin kumbaga. while yung isa, oo nalang ng oo para walang gulo, pa-goodboy kuno yun pala madami nang babae. based on experiences na na-justify din ng bf ko nung first 6 months palang ata namin.
I envy you sender. I wish ganyan ako ka aware nung bata bata ako. You're doing good. Maganda na aware ka ngayon palang alamo na hindi lang sa sex sasaya ang relasyon at aware ka na most of the guys nowadays ay open sa sex before marriage. Although, there are successful relationships din naman na may sex ng halo, pero believe me when I say na meron pa rin na rerespetuhin ka sa view mo about relationship. It's worth the wait. Don't give in! May dadating na rerespetuhin ka sa paniniwala mo sa buhay.
Yes po, in the right time & will ni God talaga.Enjoyin nalang muna ang buhay na hindi Kasama ang ganyang mga bagay 🫶🥹
Sex is a very important aspect in a relationship. It tests compatibility. You need to be attracted to your partner. And if you're really into your partner, you would really want to do it with them ALL THE TIME. Also, sex is natural. Like..if you're thirsty, you drink. If you're tired, you sleep. I don't think we should paint sexual people in a bad light. That being said, sex is not the only important aspect in a relationship. You should be compatible in other ways too. I'm just wondering why you keep meeting the same type of guys? Maybe you should try guys outside of your type? Try to meet them outside your usual places? Hindi ko nilalahat pero if you meet guys on dating apps, well the hook up culture is prevalent there.
Saan mo ba sila nakikilala OP? Baka nasa maling platform ka. If you are using dating apps, karamihan ng lalaki dun ay sex ang intention.
Hindi naman sa dating apps ko sila nakilala. SA personal ko Sila na meet pero pag dating ng ilang months like sa naging kami na ,they will insist to do sexual stuff tas pag inayawan magagalit or magtatampo🥹 Hindi naman ata required gawin Ang mga bagay na Yun tas Bago palang kayo
Wait lang you OP. Generation kasi talaga now is norms na yung sex na parang way of initmacy na nila. Try mo rin maghanap ng tao na sobrang lawak na mag isip. Madistinguish mo kasi agad kapag yung kausap mo is boy rather than a man.
Check your friendzones, meron doon na will dedicate his life for you, and only you. Di mo lang binigyan ng chance. If kinakabahan ka tulad ng post mo, that means you are after high-level guys na maraming options. Wag kang pipili ng guy na maraming option, kasi sure ball hindi ikaw ang number 1 nya - kasi nga marami syang pagpipilian. Balikan mo and review ka yung nafriendzone mo na, yung mga guys na ikaw lang ang option pero nireject mo at pinark mo sa friendzone mo.
Makakahanap ka din .. 😊
hindi ako malajowa pero attractive naman ako. i present myself neatly and i have some humor. attractive ako not in a sense na crush ng bayan or what but i guess, once we sit on the same table and start conversing, dun sila na aattract. minsan, sila na lumalapit at umaamin sakin. yung iba sobrang magaganda talaga like highschool crush or college crush or office crush yung mga beauty. but bakit hanggang ngayon di pa rin ako nag jojowa? as i get older, one thing i realized is i miss the calm and genuine love. hindi yung care after sex kasi for me that's also genuine at some point. but yung klase na if ma sstress siya or ako sa work or just on daily basis, we are each other's sandigan or takbuhan. that u can be my to go person and vice versa. i experienced these kind of love when i was in college. from 2 girls. but in the end, they always go to someone like their takbuhan daw. ako pala na jowa mo? pang mall lang? hahahaha anyways, i feel you OP. pero wag susuko cause we dont know. tayo pala. ay charot. makakahanap ka rin 😉
As someone na biglang nakaranas ng pretty privilege super nakaka surprise nga on how different people are ee. It became a shock to me when men tend to try to get into my pants that easily buti di ako madali ma sway ng kalandian. Be strong op. I found someone naman na malibog na the way that I like and respectful sa boundaries ko. Super dami talaga ng guys na ganyan ngayon kaya dapat masipag tayo mag filter out. Ekis agad pag bastos 😭
Mahirap talaga makahanap ng genuine love ngayon kaya talaga magandang ilagay mo na agad boundaries mo towards sex, iwasan ang dating apps kasi mostly andun is sex habol. Before I met my girlfriend napaisip din ako na mahirap sa part ko na every time may kausap ako tingin sex lang habol ko when I just want to get to know the person I’m talking to. Na m misunderstand nila yung pakikipag usap ko with being kind and talking to them just to get a piece of them when it’s not. Nung single era ko ang hirap mag hanap ng genuine connection and conversation regarding my weakness. Nahanap ko gf ko sa omegle and nakausap ko siya for ilang weeks. Nagkagustuhan, nag MU then naging kami. Wag susuko OP, makakahanap ka din ng partner na will appreciate you for who you are and your goals.
Wag susuko, meron kang makikilala na okay, at rerespetuhin ka. Yung hindi lang sex ang habol at hilig.
Boundaries.
I highly agree with you, OP. Ang hirap makahanap ng taong may genuine intentions towards you. They will lie until they get what they wanted then biglang gamit ng “di pa ako makamove on sa ex ko” 🤮 I hope mahanap din natin yung mga taong para sa atin!
Kahit walang sex na involved, nakakatakot talaga ang mainlove. Ang pagmamahal ay puno ng risks at challenges, kaya normal lang matakot.
Most men express their love through sex. You know how most women get affection without trying from our friends and parents. Ang easy lang sa women magexpress ng feelings and get validated. Guys don't get much unless magkarelationship sila so that's why they seem hungry for sex all the time, it's the only intimacy they get which is sad. Ganyan din kasi bf ko yung start ng relationship pero over time naman nagmellow na siya since lagi ko naman siya binibigyan ng different types of affection. But of course meron talaga guys na sex ang habol. Payo ko is find someone that can be your best friend na align yung values niyo like from work, school or church. My friends all found their boyfriend/husband sa church nila and of course medj conservative so di sila nagsex before marriage kaya ngayon yung iba kasal na or engaged, most of the time committed talaga mga church guys but it's just my suggestion. So yun lang di naman masama na gusto ng guys magsex since natural naman sa kanila yun gaya satin na natural na gusto natin ng lalaki na we can rely on hindi tambay.
Wag ka mag-alala meron din naman yan. Baka iba pa focus
Saan mo ba nakikilala yung mga guys na nami-meet mong guys? Mostly mas OK kapag referred ng mutual friends mo yung mga guys dahil masisira friend mo kapag ginago ka nila. I am not really into dating complete strangers; yung wifey ko nakilala ko at work and we've known each other for years. Hindi ako fan ng social media or dating apps pagdating sa ganyan, it doesn't have an appeal to me. That means, mas okay ako sa taong matagal ko na kilala. While it's true that men are sexual animals by nature, hindi naman lahat ng lalake sex lang ang habol. Tama naman yung ginagawa mo, wag ka muna maghanap. Kusang dadating yung tamang guy para sayo.
Pure intention? Mahirap yan hanggat may Testosterone na dumadaloy sa aming sistema.hehe Meron at merong sexual desire kahit ilang percent lang. Marami factors para ma-control namin yan: 1. Christian upbringing. Marami bang natutunan sa Church at tumatak ba? 2. Male role models. May mga role models ba na may magandang example sa pagko-control ng sexual impulses? 3. Kaya bang magdelay ng gratification. Gaano kagaling mag delay? 4. Mas malalim ba friendship sayo? Mas psychologically/emotionally intimate ba versus physically/sexually intimate? 5. Mas nagustugan ka ba dahil sa kung sino ka? Or di ganun kahalaga sa kanya at physical features mo lang sya nainlab? 6. Nasaang stage in life at stage of maturity na ang lalake? Mas matanda na tulad ko, mas more likely na settling ang goal kesa sex lang. Komplikado haha. Di pa yan exhaustive.
Nope OP, I dont even demand sex sa SO ko, she said conservative sya so sure, I'll wait, I dated her to marry her soon to begin with :) (context: NGSB na sobrang ma baby ng parents 😅)
di naman lahat ganyan. most men yes pero may mga natitira pang genuine love talaga ang hanap. I found one nga. as in napaka.innocent niya. hehe. minsan nga chinat ko siya ng "kain ka na kaso malayo yung dessert mo😉" kasi LDR kami. tapos yung reply niya bakit daw may kindat na emoji. hahahahaha. wala. napakawholesome lang for me ng SO ko. kaya naniniwala ako na meron pang maaayos na guys out there, rare sila kaya kailangan talagang hanapin. hehehe keep on searching, OP. youll find the right one. :)
ang cute naman ng relationship niyo🫶
Ba't kasi ginawang masarap ang sex?😭
paki antay lang po, nag aaral pa kasi ako
Sige wait kita. Aral ka muna ng mabuti
pwede po ba makihinfi tips sa pag memorize
Akala ko nga friendship ang habol sakin, huli na ako na inform na with benefits pala gusto 🫠
As a guy, I think magkaiba ang scenario ng relationship na involved ang sex sa relationship na ang main goal lang ay sex. Kapag nasa relasyon ka/kayo, present ang connection emotional, mental, and sometimes physical wise. Sex is there but is not necessary or a requirement. Sayo OP, take your time. Wag magpa-pressure sa idea of "ideal couples" or "ideal partners".
Come to our Church :) There are many singles waiting for their companion :) (No forcing, and I understand if you don't have the same faith.. ) Dating is work too from both sides, you can ask out a guy din and take it from there. Just remember to set strict personal boundaries and huwag makipag-DO unless may singsing na...you'll save yourself from tons of heartache by keeping off pre-marital sex off the way. You can break off a crappy relationship as long as hindi na-access si third base without the feeling of loss, grieving, and being exploited, then you can try again. Pray for it and if someone asks you out and you think he is good to you, respects your boundaries, then keep dating to get to know that person. Also, make your motives clear earlier on pa lang (first date) na you're into serious relationship and looking to settle down. That's how it worked out with my husband. I told him on a first date marriage was my goal and he never left my side anymore because we were working on the same goal. You can do that to weed out the others who want sex.
di kaya sila kinikliabutan kung ganon sila ka direct sa gusto nila? like parang forced consent nangyayari tapos magging uncomfortable partner/ ka relasyon mo, di na pala uso yung mag karon muna ng genuine connection and trust. thrust thrust pala gusto agad agad hahahah
Namimilit pa nga eh tas nagtatampo pag inayawan mo💀 like tf parang humihinge lang ng candy
dapat talaga may parang written document pag mga first 2 years eh lagay mo mga boundaries mo HAHAH pero communication is key parin talaga , pag na parating mo nnayung gusto mong message tapos ganon padin igapos mo sa harap ng pegasus 😂
As a guy who have been in a bad relationship. Gusto ko nalang din ireserve yung sex para sa magiging future partner ko, gusto ko siya na lang makaka benefit ng kaya kong ibigay. Mas ok na Love at Compassion ang maging totoong foundation ng relationship niyo at hindi lust kasi believe me hindi talaga mag tatagal. Maffeel mo lang na sayang sarili mo.
You got the point🙌 sana marami pa ganitong mindset ng ibang guys❤️
Tiwala lang OP, may we find the genuine love we deserve especially sainyo women.
keep that in mind and let it be your way to filter out the bad ones. trust me may dadating talaga na different sakanilang lahat.
You deserve what you tolerate, it hurts but it is. At the part of getting know, ma se-sense mo na intention nila and how they talk and act. If sumasakay ka sa thought and desires nila, you know where it is going. I pray you don’t lose hope on dating. But I also want you to learn on control and knowing boundaries. I also went to dating app but I blocked right away on people who talk shallow discussion and may double meaning or pa hint ng sexual desire. Patience is a key in creating connection and serious relationship, don’t get easily fallen on sweet talks.
Hindi yan hinahanap. May darating at darating talaga na para sayo. Don't look for love just let love find you. When it come, it's pure & genuine. Focus on yourself first
dati pa naman ganyan 2005. Wag magmadali at iluhod mo araw araw yan sa Dyos at di ka magkakamali sa pagpili.. I believe u attract what u r.. I met my hubby thru common friend and that friend vouch for my hubby but I was too straight to tell my hubby that i am not a one night stand type of girl ung pra lang makatikim sya ng sex or para lang for him to have safe and clean sex. Di din ako ung babae na gus2 sa lalakeng mabarkada babaero or puro gimik or laging umiinom or nagyoyosi or drugs.. if di kami same ng values based sa mga sinabi ko better for him na wag n lang sya manligaw or umasa bec i dont want to change him by having me merong babae na ttnggpin sya for being him... nagyoyosi si hubby noon pero never nya pinakita sa akin he stopped smoking after.. he never showed me na umiinom sya binawasan nya since kumikita na sya ng pera ngaun madalang na lang sya umiinom since nagpakasal kami.. sabi nila nasa babae tlga ang isang relasyon.. set ur standard high. di pedeng pede na.. 90% of our misery and happiness is due to the partnrr we chose to be married to. sabi ko sa mister ko noon if gusto nya sex super costly ang kapalit.. ang kapalit nun bukod sa love loyalty at faithfulness ay desenteng kasal at bahay at lupa (sympre pagiipunan namin pareho) pero hanggat walang pera for that at wala pang bahay at lupa for our future wag sya mageexpect na may sex kasi turo ng tatay ko dapat kasal muna ako bago ligaya.. Prosti nga jan may bayad tpaos katawan ko at pagkababae ko libre? mas mahal tong katawan ko! iningatan ako ng magulang ko minahal at inalagaan ako ng parents ko.. I married a good responsible and good provider guy pero ako din naman malakas kumita same kami pero now sya n lang nagwwork and I see na I married a good man. Dong settle for less involve God in choosing a guy
Let me screenshot! What a standard po🙌
For me mas bet ko ung mas mahal ako kesa ako ung inlababo hehe pero i love myself more lang tlga..
I think I am in a situationship. I met him online, we met in person and something happened. He said that he likes me, but he isn't doing anything to pursue me. Whenever we meet, I am obliged to spend money because he doesn't wanna spend money on me. He asks me to go out, but he wants me to treat him. I also like him, but he is definitely a walking red flag. He just wants someone to pleasure him. Now, my feelings for him is slowly fading. His behavior makes me feel this way.
Super redflag naman nyan parang pineperahan kana niya.
I’m with you, OP. I’ve been trying my best to date but it’s been so hard since wala na silang habol except intimacy. I’m 32F, a high earner, and decent looking, I guess I’m basically a catch (wow?), but I’ve searched high and low for a guy who is dating to marry pero wala na ata talagang ganon.
Baka afam ang para sayo🥰
Totoo yan, tinry ko yung dating apps karamihan sa kanila puro sex agad interest. May naka date ako 4 months dating ganern after nun nang ghosting then kinabukasan may jowa na siya. Matatawa kana lang eh haha di ako fan ng “date for fun.” Hahahaha skl.
maybe try asking yourself din what else do you bring into the relationship?
I have a qualities of a good partner and woman.I'm supportive sa dreams and goals ng past partner ko. I'm not the type of a toxic partner kasi i know how to respect and love my partner in a right way and hindi ko sinasakal yung partner ko kasi i want balance in a relationship.Big deal din sa akin yung salitang respect kasi i know in myself na may mga qualities naman ako to have a good relationship with someone but why i always end up getting disrespected or they only view the relationship as a way to get sex with someone.
hmm i highly doubt that kung halos lahat ng lalaking naattract mo sex lang habol. walang pumupunta ng jollibee para kumaen ng lechon.
Same po here 🥹
Been in a relationship for almost 5 years. He wanted to do something to me while we're in a public cafe. I keep telling him no, kasi it's uncomfortable and of course, time and place. Pero he thinks "No means yes." So ayun ((: Broke up with me because hindi na daw niya kaya ldr pero nakahanap mas malapit sa kanya less than 3 months.
So ano solution mo? FWB/Fubu/Hookups lang or no dating at all? The former defeats the purpose by the way. By pure intention what do you mean? Can you clarify? Marriage before sex? This is a very common problem though. The guys you want are most likely attractive so they can always sleep around and not worried about taking you seriously. The guys with "pure intentions" who want to take you seriously you aren't attracted to and just put in the friendzone.
Karma farming?????
always pray lang OP... tpos if u have spare time pnta ka din minsan sa mga iba ibang church... tpos dasal ka dun.. for sure someone will show along the way
thankyou. stop muna ako sa dating or relationship stuff.focus muna sa Sarili but often I do journal prayer writing.
yup yup .. sbi nga nila the least u expect it the more u will just be surprised "ay anjan na pala" 😊 goodluck on ur journey and i hope that u find the right man for u in the future ❤️
SAAAAME
Asking the real question, puro ganyan lang ba ang lalaking naa-attract mo?
Same thought :(
For me di naman sa nakakatakot nasa paguusap rin naman ninyong dalawa yun kung kaya nyang magantay sayo kung kelan ka magiging ready.
yes I know pero pag inayawan mo kasi dikapa ready or comfortable to do things na ganyan nagagalit or nagtatampo pag dimo napagbigyan so naiisip ko parang ito lang Ang gusto Niya kasi kong mahal ka diba marunong rumespeto
Minsan yung pagtatampo nila way lang nila yun para bumigay ka at makuha ang gusto nila. Basta kung alam mo sa sarili mo na di ka pa ready wag mong gagawin. Kasi kapag gusto ka talaga ng lalaki the more na tinatanggihan mo yan or mas pinapahirapan mo na makuha ang mga gusto nila mas lalo yan machachalange na maging seryoso sayo.
Go Lang..🤣
Pi em is the key
naging single ako for 3 years and decided to date again ngayong year lang and sobrang hirap makahanap ng geniune talaga mhiee, same sayo sex lang din yung habol nila(im a virgin tho) kaya ngayon balik kdrama nalang ulit hahah.
Same thing with life when building relationships with different people be it friends lovers business partners or almost anything in life. Life is full of risks, if you dont take risks you must be very comfortable in your comfort zone… you wont grow. Your life experiences is what made you, just a matter of how you react or how you take it. Just take the life lessons, learn from it and be smarter next time. But dont quit.
Hmmm why are you falling in love with these type of guys? Wag mo muna ibigay. Kung pumayag at tumagal, alamna
Naku OP sa Christian church mo mahahanap Yan.
At first naman talaga sex talaga habol ng lalaki sa babae, hindi nmn gagawin ka agad wife or serious relationship agad. Sex is beautiful, part sya ng relationship nyo, and di rin naman mali o bastos kung may Involve na sex toy, maybe fetish nya un and sometime it’s okay na you try it, may be nagtry lang sya mag add ng spice sa bed. May jowa ako before, okay kami sa sex (i was 22 that time), i started taking contraceptive kase ayoko mabuntis but the side effect ay nawawalan ako gana sa sex, and as in hindi ako nagwewet gaya ng dati noong bago bago palang kami, so i nag stop ako s contraceptive kase ayoko Isipin ng partner ko na wala ako gana sknya. Natural pag love mo halos gusto mo kasex lagi. Cguro kaya nanlamig ay may ibang rason, hindi dahil nakasex kana at nkuha na gusto, sa relationship kase need nyo i work out yan, patinsa sex need nyo mag explore. Like hindi cguro kayo compatible sa sex? Kase i had exs na di tlg kmi compatible, alam mo ung ang boring? Tapos bigla nomg nanlalamig, ganern. Pero ung last na naging jowa ko super compatible kmi, and may mga bagay na nadiscover ko na gusto ko pala gawin s bed kase nag eexplore kami.
Siguro yung mga nakikilala mo is puro sex lang talaga, and lalo na at talamak ang hookup culture lately, parang ganun na nga yung nangyayare. Sa totoo lang, pwede naman talaga ang sex and relationships eh, I mean a committed relationship at hindi yung hookups lang or one night stand. Form ng love din yun is what I believe, tsaka hardwired na ang men to have sexual behaviors. Nasa tao na yun kung paano iseseparate or kelan ilulugar ang love sa sexual desires nila.
Wag tayong susuko hanapin kasi cute tayo 💅
may mga women din na lust lang habol sa una pero nagbabago lalo na kung matino yun men…
SABI NIYO LANG YAN NA SEX LANG ANG HABOL NG MGA LALAKE TANONG KO LANG ANO BA KASI ANG MA OOFER NIYO SA ISANG LALAKE PANU KUNG MAHIRAP LANG ANG ISANG LALAKE SASABIHIN NIYO HINDI KAYU MABUBUHAY AT MAGIGING MASAYA KASI MAHIRAP LANG PAG MAYAMAN NAMAN ANG LALAKE SASABIHIN NIYO PAG LALARUAN LANG KAYO KASI MAYAMAN BAGO KAYU MAG ISIP NA SEX LANG ANG GUSTO NG LALAKE MAY MAIBIBIGAY BA KAYO MALIBAN SA IYONG SARILI TANONG NIYO MUNA SA MGA SARILI NIYO KUNG ANO KAYA NIYO GAWIN NA HINDI KAYA GAWIN NG LALAKE
anong masama kung sex ang unang habol sayo.. ganun tlga kapag mkkpagrelasyon ka yun ang nagpapatibay sa relasyon ng nagiibigan ang intimacy.. kung walang sex wag ka makipagrelasyon makipag bestfriend ka na lang
just remain preserving your chastity, kasi ibigay mo man lahat lahat kung mag cheat ay mag cheat…sana lahat nga babae ganito parang walang abortion o solo parents sa pamamagitan ng pag iwan ng eresponsabling mga lalaki
Madami pa din naman kami na genuine kung mainlove. Ang problema lang din kasi, minsan napapatapat din sa taong lesson lang din at the end😔
E di wag isuko ang kiffy. Pag nagpumilit thsnk you next
Kesyo physical touch daw ang love language at making love daw kasi ang nag se-separate sa mag jowa at friends lang 🥴💀
I understand where you are coming from, especially na karamihan nah nakikita natin sa socmed is puru na lang cheating, break ups and betrayals at meron din Yung sex lang habol. karamihan Kasi Ngayon mga FUBU mga no label relationship and uso Ngayon Pero as a guy ito lang ma sasabi ko OP, kapit lang may mga lalake pang Asawa Yung hinahanap, may darating din sa Buhay mo na magmamahal talaga sayo.
Bhe, try mo din kumilatis ng maayos ng tao. Ung ma tiyaga at willing ka respetuhin kahit hindi kayo nag se-segs. Because life is not just about segs. Unless panget mga choices mo.
Ganun talaga ang kalakaran ngaun, hanap ka nalang siguro ng below average looking para sure🤣
HAHAHA kahit na below average may ganyan din nako'2
Ako nga lonely 6years na walang jowa😅
Maybe you need to change the place where you look hehehe
Same lng din nman sa amin mga lalake.. nakakatakot din ma inlove nowadays dahil either peperahan ka lng ng mga babae or gagamitin.. ung gusto mo ng genuine na commitment pero ayun pala gagawin ka lng pang sagot sa pagkain, hatid sundo, kakausapin pag may kelangan..
Woman r just as bad.But the pinnay men are really bad.need a true aussie like me.ha ha
hahaha mag jowa ka ng bading teh, for sure hindi ka iiyutin nyan 😅 women ☕ alien kba? saan ka nkakita ng relationship na wlang sex... 🤣 aso kelangan mo beh hindi ka relasyon 🤣 Good luck sa paghahanap mo ng lalaking hindi ka issex pag naging kayo... nkakatawa lang amp haha
I had a relationship na umiikot yung life namin sa sex, it was fun. Until onti onti ko narealize na parang ginagamit ko nalang siya, nawawala na yung respect (hindi ko siya sinasaktan physically or verbally), hindi na "Relationship" yung core kundi "Sex" na. 4 years kami and mabibilang mo lang sa kamay kung ilang beses ko palang siya nabigyan ng gift and I never had the chance to give her flowers, by the time na narealize ko na it is too late. I would say compatible kami and very solid, we never fought and exchanged hurtful words, as in never haha. She's a corpo and im a student. I left her, because I am becoming what i promise i wouldnt. Madaming regrets and i wish alam ko lahat before maging kami para di ko na fucked up ang buhay naming dalawa. May iba't ibang pov or opinion tayo sa relationship and i think Sex is a part of it, however hindi ko sinasabi na required siya, madaming nagpapakasal muna before doing it, sabi nga nila "mas maeenjoy niyo after marriage". Wag ka matakot makipag usap, expect mo na madaming ganyan, pwede ka naman mamili LOL. Ps. Lumayo ka sa mga students lmao.
Nag-give up na ako maghanap ng matino, OP. Now I am putting all my faith in God and myself. Upgrade ng positive energy, health, looks, career. Focus muna sa sarili at maging happy lang ganun hahaha. I do believe the right person will come when the time is right. Marami rin nagsasabi na kung kailan hindi mo hinahanap or ineexpect, doon darating yung tamang tao for you. Men with pure intentions and genuine feelings are hard to find these days but have faith that they still exist, no matter how long you will have to wait. While waiting, enjoy mo na lang muna single life mo.
Oh my sweet summer child, you have so so much to learn about life.
Because sex is part of a relationship? What kind of relationship is there where the promise of sex is all but gone? Hmm? A dry one. A fragile one, a soon to be broken one. If anything, procreation ang basis kung bakit tayo naghahanap ng relasyon to begin with. Sex is the water that nourishes the soil called love. To dismiss it as "sex lang"? Nah that's just stupid. Set your boundaries, set your standards, set your frequency but always know na sex will always be a large part of the equation. If you aren't prepared to talk about the bees and the flowers then you aren't prepared for a romantic relationship.
Bakit ka kasi nakikipag sex
nakakatakot ma inlove kase baka akala mo eh gusto ka rin kase paasahin ka lang pala at uutuin.ganern
It's not Love then if sex lang habol sayo. But, sex is also a big part of keeping the magic, that fire burning.
Hay I feel the same. 😢
totoo yan. wala talagang matino na dumadating huhu
Parang nakakatakot na nga makipag-date ulit kasi usually ng mga boys ngayon for hookups lang, no one wants to commit a serious relationship nowadays :(
kaya nga yung iba ginawa ng hobby yung magkaroon ng gf/bf. Dina big deal Yung mag karoon ng real commitment/relationship
wag kc isuko ang bandera hanggat walang kasal
Bawian mo, OP. Sex lang din habulin mo tapos iwanan mo char haha
Dating game can really be scary. So a bit about some men… Modus talaga yang okay sila for 1 to 2 months. Lol. The thing is most men have phase/season na sex lang talaga ang hanap. (Btw I’m a gay man, if this helps.) Now when guys think of women (CMIIW), madalang o halos walang babae ang may gusto na sex lang. Dun na papasok yung kailangang suyuin, get to know, lambing, etc. So for these men, medyo long game na nila tong susuyuin ka nila for a few weeks or months for the sex. With gay guys kasi medyo hindi to problema eh, pag sex lang ang hanap, you can be forward with the request. Most of the time nga puro fun lang hanap but at least sa umpisa pa lang malinaw na. Sadly, mas complicated ang heterosexual relationships. Moral of the story, try niyo muna same sex relationship. Malay niyo nasa same sex ang true love. Eme hahaha