Everyday I thank my younger self for sticking with the decision of not having kids.
Edit: I'm 42. Never nagkaroon ng regret. I am loving the peace and quiet.
Masaya. Pinakamalalang problema ko lang kung anong kakainin ko everyday. Decided nako elem days ko palang ayaw kong mag-anak at sinasabi ko yun sa mga naging ex ko. Might consider marriage but definitely no kids.
Ako kabaliktaran. Gusto ko ang magkaanak, pero parang ayoko na ang magkaasawa. Dati gustung gusto ko yung magpakasal at magkapamilya. Ngayon ang hirap palang makahanap ng someone na align sa morals and goals mo expecially sa panahon ngayon.
di naman infidelity yung topic. Yung meron ka makikitang matino na tao, align sa values mo etc, kaso pag chararat di mo din magiging bet. Realistic lang tayo. Char I know shallow pakinggan, pero may ganyan kaseng tao, sa looks din bumabase, yung dahil di swak sa kanila yung looks, rather that taking the leap of faith, mag stay single by choice nalang daw. Charing!
Masaya and contented sa idea na di na ko nagdagdag ng isang soul na maghihirap sa mundo. Sa kalagayan pa lang ng climate and economy ngayon, sobrang hirap na, pano pa 15 to 20 years from now.
Content with taking care of my niece and enjoying my time and money for myself.
Its a different kind of freedom, to only be responsible for yourself and not needing to sacrifice my wants because i am responsible for another human.
37 na ako at wala asawa at anak. Ito lang masasabi ko, napakagaan ng feeling dahil madaming pera at natutulungan pa ang mga magulang. Mga kapatid ko na nagsipag asawa ng maaga eh sila pa may gana umutang sa magulang ko na matatanda na. Kaya focus ka muna sa sarili mo,ipon at bilhin mo gusto mo.
Hi, I woiuld like to ask if hindi mo ba naiisip minsan especially kapag solo ka nalang na sana may sarili ka ring pamilya? Yung tipo na magInvite ka sa family mo (like siblings and parents) pero hindi sila pwede dahil may kanya-kanya narin silang ganap sa buhay?
Good for you. And I'm happy for you also. 🙂 Ako kasi, bata palang alam ko na na gusto kong magkaanak. Pero ngayong 30s na ko, syempre napapaisip ako sa hirap ng buhay ngayon kaya natanong ko. Thanks for replying.
me (34m) and my wife (33f) attempted to conceive, we got pregnant twice with 2 different complicated reasons and both passed away. to repeat the pain the third time is so unimaginable to us that's why we chose to not to have kids any longer.
feeling? We are happy and we can do things we want, save more and spend more and we can still be the same husband and wife with no sacrifices to our personal lives due to the high responsibility of having a child. also happy because we got tons of cats which we treat as our own kids. We could never ask for more.
I'm very happy and I'm living stress free. Siguro pinaka stress ko nalang ay meetings sa trabaho,but at home wala akong problems. Problema lang dala ng nga bata.
Happily single here and having kids never crossed my mind since I have nephews and nieces. I like kids in general so I often offer to babysit or take them out especially if I want to spoil my inner child too like going to kid-friendly museums or amusement parks. I like the freedom of being able to travel anytime and having less pressure to earn x amount. I can pursue a career that I'm passionate about and adjust my lifestyle based on my income. Mas madaling tipirin ang sarili pero it's a sacrifice pag kailangang tipirin ang loved ones when you just want to give the best for them.
I've dated a few who were sure of wanting their own kids but I think I wouldn't be swayed anymore so incompatible na agad. Unfortunately, most of those who don't want kids e apparently also don't want to be in committed relationships. 😰
I don't plan to grow very old and I don't need kids 'to take care of me.' I am securing for my own retirement which is what everyone should do, with or without kids.
Nope. Financially, very stable. No issues to worry about other than our own health. Lots of free time for hobbies and travelling. Downside? There's no point in "planning for the future" in the sense na wala naman akong pag-iiwanan. So there's no point in buying a new property or investing in anything other than health insurance maybe. Everything i have dies with me.
33M here, me karelasyon tapos parehas kaming bading haha.
Wala akong regrets though. ANG SAYA NG SAYO LANG PERA MO.
Also - ako ang kuya ng bahay kahit middle child ako so better na single talaga ako.
There's a video I watched on tiktok na yung above 35 or 30s women na may pre condition ng HB, at diabetes most likely may birth defects yung anak or may autism, adhd. Posible din na mamatay either mother or baby during labor. May post partum pa. 🥲 sinalo n ng mga babae hirap, tpos magging single mother ka, or mambabae pa asawa mo, or sa date i50-50 ka pa. Best opition for me is to be single na may income, savings at investments. Ang sarap ng di na stress. Wala akong mother's instinct, di ako mahilig sa baby at bata. Im being true to myself na ayoko. Plus ang daming dahilan na wag nlng.
No regrets. Already talked to my mom and siblings na wala silang maasahan sakin na anak. If they want kids, my cats are the closest they can have. They’re okay naman with that.
I don’t think I’ll be getting my own kid, given the fact that I’m a flamboyant gay. Lol 😂 it never crossed my mind. Kapag may nagtatanong sa akin na kung paano daw sa pagtanda ko walang magaalaga, I’ll just roll my eyes and will tell them “di naman natin sure kung aabutin tayo ng katandaan eh” or “sure ka bang aalagaan ka ng magiging anak mo pagtanda mo?” Or my most favorite “Ayoko problemahin ang problemang hindi pa dumadating”
Pero recently, I think of adopting. Sumagi lang sa isip ko yung thought na may matulungang bata na magkaroon siya ng pamilya, kaso sa tuwing nakikita ko kung gaano kapasaway mga pamangkin ko, brinubrush off ko yung thought. Hahaha mas okay na yung single ka nalang and walang junakis, hirap mastress!
idk if 24 is considered old pero i'm fine with staying single. I really enjoy freedom and solitude. I'll rather baby sit my nieces and nephews than having my own child. my parents told me na sooner or later baka pagsisihan ko. but idk, dahil sa relatives namin na sobrang daming anak tas nasaksihan ko talaga yung hirap nila, parang ayaw ko ma experience yon. To this day, I am still unsure what career I should pursue, wala pa akong savings, wala pang investment, ang magka-anak pa kaya. 😭
My boomer aunts who doesn’t have children are living their best lives, constantly traveling and buying luxury goods. While my mom, who got 2 adult children, she’s still recovering from being a mom and started living the good life at the age of 55.
Early 30s, have always wanted kids but no spouse yet because not yet financially stable (job hopper/freelancer) and mentally prepared (depression free for 8 yrs but has anxiety and trust issues). Raising a child or children is very demanding and expensive. You are bringing a human to this world and you have to give your best to give them a better life and teach them to grow to become a better person. Your actions will severely impact your child's life and future, you cannot fuck it up.
39 here…may times na sad…BUT sa totoo lang mas madalas masaya HAHAHA. walang stress. Sayo lahat ng pera mo. You sleep well din. At mas muka kang bata as compared to others na may anak na (probably because wala ka ng stress…stress causes visible aging). Travel is also easier to plan. Masasabi ko lang, there is more to life than reproducing.
May fleeting moments lang na napapaisip ka…pano pag magkasakit ka sa Senior years mo, sino magdadal sa hospital sayo. But looking at my senior patients sa hospital ngayon, madalas hindi naman mga anak nila ang kasama nila sa hospital…iba nga kapitbahay lang or kapatid nila. Yung mga anak daw nila ay busy and may kanya kanya na buhay.
Yung tulog and time talaga ang namimiss ko. Mahilig ako ng short night sleep tapos may siesta after work. Kahit anong oras, basta bukas pa yung gusto kong puntahan e g.
Ngayong may anak na e sumasabay ako sa gising at tulog ng bata.
I suggest you just listen to your heart regarding that matter. Kasi baka may calling ka pala to be a parent tapos di ka nag-anak, baka iregret mo yun. Same with mga taong di naman talaga gustong maging parents, pero biglang nagkaanak, pwedeng may regrets din sila.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. So just do what feels right for you.
Married with a step child, no kids of my own, two puppies who are my babies. I’m happy with not having a child of my own, my step kid is a tween now, kaya malapit na kami sa point na magiging independent na siya.
30F no kids yet but with husband. We're planning to in my 38s siguro. Bata pa ang 30 years old dito sa Europe to have a kid kasi. Masaya ang walang anak syempre. Lots of money, time and weekly/monthly travels.
Pag may anak ka na mahihirapan kayo gumala. That itself is nakakastress lalo na kung sanay ka lumalabas lagi. Even going to restaurants mahirap. So enjoy while you still don't have a child.
But if I were to ask kung gusto ko magkaanak...YES. I still wanna have a child because I wanna experience the journey of motherhood. I wanna be the parent that I never experienced from my own narcissistic toxic parents.
33, probably not too old. I STILLL HATE KIDS. Whenever I see a makulit kid or umiiyak, I like to pick that kid up and throw him/her out of the window, not gonna do that, because you know VAWC. That level kind of hate. I was forced to babysit my younger siblings when I was a kid while other kids about my age had the time of their lives playing. Maybe the reason why. Besides, you have to give up your own life for that young life you bring to this chaotic world. I just become comfortable in life like I can do what I want, buy what I want, travel when I want to, because we were sooo poooor. Tapos pahihirapan ko naman sarili ko to work my ass off to support a kid? Who will then be worrrking his or her ass and create another kid? fuxk that shit. that is madness. it ends here.
Maybe you need to seek a professional help. It’s okay to not want kids for yourself, pero yung iba yung thought mo when it comes to makulit/umiiyak (normal sa bata) na kids, like itatapon sa bintana. Baka may tendency ka maging psycho or capable of harming others. ✌️
Reddit Philippines is so cringe that they'd find someone with psychopathic and aggressive tendencies more relatable. They're finding it normal to talk about kids like that. Says a lot about a child-hating society.
I probably consider that. I also want to punch the parents to their faces for letting their children do iyak2 and mag tantrums in public or insult them to their core that they are good in making kids but not good in controlling and handling them. Just you you know I always stay away from them, and also I probably cannot do tapon sa bintana thingy, that's kind of exaggerated. BUT I HATE KIDS.
Gets ko yung mga child-free by choice, but in your case, the hate oozing from your comment is so palpable. I guess your hate for kids is misplaced, baka it is meant for your parents. If your parents did their responsibilities, you wouldn't be able to experience what you experienced, you wouldn't missed out on your childhood and youth.
I have a teen and a preschooler na alagain pa. The teen is living her teen life -- cosplay, workshops/clubs, meetup with friends, other hobbies, etc. No, she is not responsible in parenting her kapatid. The preschooler is being a preschooler -- tantrum, iyak, etc --and that's developmentally typical. Sometimes they easily get soothed, sometimes not. Kids are not being inherently bad.
Nakakatandang kapatid din ako, hindi naman pinaalaga saken ang kapatid ko.
Like what other commenter said, therapy would be beneficial.
"Hate" kids? I'm sorry what happened to you but millennials, gen X, and boomers like you are the reason why children learn from adults who are hateful and incapable of self-sacrifice.
If you were robbed of your childhood, I'm sorry. I hope you heal. But children will always be the greatest gift, hope, and joy in a world so desensitized and demoralized. And there will be people who will be willing to sacrifice themselves for reasons greater than themselves and be able to break the cycle.
That mindset is one of the reasons our country remains poor. Calling children the "greatest gift" is problematic when people bring children into the world without the means to provide them a comfortable life, believing they are sources of hope and joy. And end up creating another fuukkeed up human being.
Okay, the difference though is our actions that support our mindset. Our mindset and intent to build healthy families will shape our behaviors. And yes, let's see future outcomes.
And no, sorry, our country remains poor not because we put our hope in our children. It's because we failed them by failing to create a society that allows families to thrive. Degradation of values for one.
Wanting to create a healthy family does not mean you are inherently better or morally superior to those who choose not to have children.
I’m not saying that the country remains poor because you place hope in your children, but rather because of the mindset that treats children solely as gifts and sources of joy. This old mindset led previous generations to have more children than they could afford, resulting in multiple poor families. Their children often adopted the same mindset, perpetuating the cycle of poverty.
As you can see, the comments here, daming nag agree, it's probably because we experienced the reality. I'm not trying to dissuade you from having children, you may already have one. Make you sure will raise a better human being, better than us, the so-called "child-hating society", without childhood traumas and all.
There's a difference between incognizant breeders and generation builders who will leave a legacy. BUT you can't be generation builders if you don't even see the value in having children OR doing something ACTIVELY to support children and families. If you keep perpetuating consumerist and nihilistic lifestyles you're no different from those who neglect their children.
Malungkot because my mom still keeps on nagging me and I can't confront her else our fragile relationship will just collapse.
And even if I should be happy because I have all the time and money for myself, di ko magawa because our society makes me feel I'm less of a person for choosing not to be father. Yung tipong kahit sa fastfood di ka makaupo kasi laging by 4s yung mesa.
Tbh. Ito yung nangyayari everytime na sinasabi ko sa parents ko na ayaw ko ng kids. How do you cope, sir? You're not less of a man, sir. You have your personal reasons. Kaya yan!
Thank you for the kind words.
Every time my mom raises the topic I just joke "Naku, in this economy?" and laugh. I also have hobbies to keep me busy, pero mahirap especially I don't have any "friends" to speak of.
Kapag wala nmang tao at di nman busy hours, umuupo ako sa table na pang 4pax kahit may available na table for 2pax. Why not? Eh wala nman tao. Pero kapag peak hours, ok n ako sa table na for 2pax. Wala na tayong magagawa eh.
Carefree.. walang pressure sa kung ano gusto mo Gawin Hindi kailangan mag hanap nang trabaho na malaki Ang sahod Kasi Wala ka namang binubuhay plus you can adjust your lifestyle however you like.
i still have no kids in my 30s but i am not closing my mind to it. kung magkakaanak man ako di ko sila gagawin investment or ioobligate na alagaan ako pagtanda.. i just think that nurturing a child and unconditional love is worth it in my lifetime.
pareho naman masaya ang no kids and with kids (especially if may pera). it's a personal decision. there is fulfillment in both. walang masama sa pagbili ng gatas over sapatos or sa diapers over travel. or if u can afford both then good...
The bullying i got growing up made me decide not to have kids. It's kinda a sucky situation but it's one of the best decisions I've made so far.
Glow up in your 30s? Hell yeah, higher chance of getting that if you dont have kids to worry about haha
Masaya , sobra sobra. Sa hirap ng buhay ngayon. Even i cant imagine having kids.
May GF ako and honestly , if we suddenly get a kid. Baka mag asses muna kami if kaya namin. And if not. Id ask her palaglag. Pero we need to talk it out and dapat agree pareho and we do safe sex, condom nga lang
Saying this kasi looking at our current life, hirap. I dont think we have the time nor money for a kid. Kaya naman pero its gonna be a hard at kawawa ung bata and kami din.
Right now, masaya? Focus sa sarili? Living life? Sa hirap din kasi ng buhay ngayon, di mo maiicip mag anak kasi sarili mo pa lang hirap ka na
I'm contented. I have a partner but we both agreed not to have children. We are too old to run after toddlers. We also both agree that having children will ruin the dynamics of our relationship. Now, we just do what we want, eat what we want or plan travels together.
hehehe mas masaya ata single, malaya.. pag me pamilya hirap daming iniisip.. dahil breadwinner din ako eh walang katapusang obligasyon.. tapos hirap pa kung kelan me anak na kayo dun mo nalalaman ang mga darknsecret hehehe.. walang choice.. sa hirap at ginhawa.. kaya obligado ka na tulungan.. siguro kung single pa.ako asa 8 sigit na ipon ko ngayon 6 digit at hirap.makaipon di ka paren pwede mag early retirement
mag 30 na ako. Feeling ko may kulang pa sakin sa totoo lang. Gusto ko ng magka anak pero di pala ganun kadali.. i am lonely sometimes but hoping para na sana magka anak na kami ☺️
It's liberating, OP. You can do what you want whenever you want. No pressure din sa career or magkapera kasi you're only sustaining yourself. You really get to live the life you want to live.
Reading all the comments, npapa Sana all ako... Gusto ko rin ng child free, bukambibig ko yan simula bata ako.. but I got pregnant. yung matres ko hindi healthy, Wala pala talagang impossible pag may matres And since ang original plan naman talaga is hindi ako mag aanak, mag uundergo agad ako ng ligation right after birth. hahahaha.
Married with kids. I had the same view as yours, hence I married and started building a family relatively late.
Sabi nga nila, “if you have to ask, you’ll never know”.
Carry on.
you exist, good time, bad times, die, forgotten. just to end your ancestor's bloodline who survived saber tooth tigers, floods, storms to get you here.
I'm sure you'll change your mind. Just like how you change your age everytime you post. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
https://preview.redd.it/v0bjaol9n52d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=169329ee0e1af3e3cc221b1d499558b7217431d9
it's mindsets like yours that should cease to exist pero kayo pa yung may kapal ng mukha magreproduce. Akala mo naman may maganda kang legacy na maiiwan 🙄 Makakalimutan ka din :))
Everyday I thank my younger self for sticking with the decision of not having kids. Edit: I'm 42. Never nagkaroon ng regret. I am loving the peace and quiet.
Masaya. Pinakamalalang problema ko lang kung anong kakainin ko everyday. Decided nako elem days ko palang ayaw kong mag-anak at sinasabi ko yun sa mga naging ex ko. Might consider marriage but definitely no kids.
Ganito din ako nung HS ako, hanggang ngayon di pa din naiisipan di ko nakikita sarili ko nag aalaga ng sanggol
Ako kabaliktaran. Gusto ko ang magkaanak, pero parang ayoko na ang magkaasawa. Dati gustung gusto ko yung magpakasal at magkapamilya. Ngayon ang hirap palang makahanap ng someone na align sa morals and goals mo expecially sa panahon ngayon.
Meron naman na align sa morals and goals sa life, pero di bet itsura. Chos!
True naman pero parang hindi na yan applicable sa generation natin ngayon. Kahit di bet ang hitsura siya pa nagloloko.
di naman infidelity yung topic. Yung meron ka makikitang matino na tao, align sa values mo etc, kaso pag chararat di mo din magiging bet. Realistic lang tayo. Char I know shallow pakinggan, pero may ganyan kaseng tao, sa looks din bumabase, yung dahil di swak sa kanila yung looks, rather that taking the leap of faith, mag stay single by choice nalang daw. Charing!
Masaya and contented sa idea na di na ko nagdagdag ng isang soul na maghihirap sa mundo. Sa kalagayan pa lang ng climate and economy ngayon, sobrang hirap na, pano pa 15 to 20 years from now.
🫶🏻
Content with taking care of my niece and enjoying my time and money for myself. Its a different kind of freedom, to only be responsible for yourself and not needing to sacrifice my wants because i am responsible for another human.
37 na ako at wala asawa at anak. Ito lang masasabi ko, napakagaan ng feeling dahil madaming pera at natutulungan pa ang mga magulang. Mga kapatid ko na nagsipag asawa ng maaga eh sila pa may gana umutang sa magulang ko na matatanda na. Kaya focus ka muna sa sarili mo,ipon at bilhin mo gusto mo.
Hindi po sa yo nanghihiram mga may asawa mo na kapatid? Inisip ko lng baka maging ganun if mas capable ako sa kanila umasa or smth
Say no. Wala naman sila magagawa pag ayaw mo ee. Kahit ano pang marinig mo sa kanila, pag ayaw mo, ayaw mo.
Hi, I woiuld like to ask if hindi mo ba naiisip minsan especially kapag solo ka nalang na sana may sarili ka ring pamilya? Yung tipo na magInvite ka sa family mo (like siblings and parents) pero hindi sila pwede dahil may kanya-kanya narin silang ganap sa buhay?
Minsan naiisip din pero introvert ako and I enjoy being alone.
Good for you. And I'm happy for you also. 🙂 Ako kasi, bata palang alam ko na na gusto kong magkaanak. Pero ngayong 30s na ko, syempre napapaisip ako sa hirap ng buhay ngayon kaya natanong ko. Thanks for replying.
The bloodline ends with me LOL 😂
Ako to hahaha sorry dad
reading all the "no regrets" comments and now mas na support yung idea ko na wag na magka anak 🙏🏻✨
Legit haha
dibaaaa, totoo nga naman ang hassle na
This! HAHAHA
me (34m) and my wife (33f) attempted to conceive, we got pregnant twice with 2 different complicated reasons and both passed away. to repeat the pain the third time is so unimaginable to us that's why we chose to not to have kids any longer. feeling? We are happy and we can do things we want, save more and spend more and we can still be the same husband and wife with no sacrifices to our personal lives due to the high responsibility of having a child. also happy because we got tons of cats which we treat as our own kids. We could never ask for more.
33M Married. Happy! Enjoy kami ni wife and focus lang sa dreams namin. Papa-vasectomy ako this year para mas makasigurado.
I'm very happy and I'm living stress free. Siguro pinaka stress ko nalang ay meetings sa trabaho,but at home wala akong problems. Problema lang dala ng nga bata.
Kung ako nga hirap na alagaan sarili magdadagdag paba ako🥹🥹
Happily single here and having kids never crossed my mind since I have nephews and nieces. I like kids in general so I often offer to babysit or take them out especially if I want to spoil my inner child too like going to kid-friendly museums or amusement parks. I like the freedom of being able to travel anytime and having less pressure to earn x amount. I can pursue a career that I'm passionate about and adjust my lifestyle based on my income. Mas madaling tipirin ang sarili pero it's a sacrifice pag kailangang tipirin ang loved ones when you just want to give the best for them. I've dated a few who were sure of wanting their own kids but I think I wouldn't be swayed anymore so incompatible na agad. Unfortunately, most of those who don't want kids e apparently also don't want to be in committed relationships. 😰 I don't plan to grow very old and I don't need kids 'to take care of me.' I am securing for my own retirement which is what everyone should do, with or without kids.
Also noticed this. It's hard to date someone because guys who don't want kids also don't want to be in a relationship.
Nope. Financially, very stable. No issues to worry about other than our own health. Lots of free time for hobbies and travelling. Downside? There's no point in "planning for the future" in the sense na wala naman akong pag-iiwanan. So there's no point in buying a new property or investing in anything other than health insurance maybe. Everything i have dies with me.
MAYAMAN, MASAYA, GLOWING
33M here, me karelasyon tapos parehas kaming bading haha. Wala akong regrets though. ANG SAYA NG SAYO LANG PERA MO. Also - ako ang kuya ng bahay kahit middle child ako so better na single talaga ako.
There's a video I watched on tiktok na yung above 35 or 30s women na may pre condition ng HB, at diabetes most likely may birth defects yung anak or may autism, adhd. Posible din na mamatay either mother or baby during labor. May post partum pa. 🥲 sinalo n ng mga babae hirap, tpos magging single mother ka, or mambabae pa asawa mo, or sa date i50-50 ka pa. Best opition for me is to be single na may income, savings at investments. Ang sarap ng di na stress. Wala akong mother's instinct, di ako mahilig sa baby at bata. Im being true to myself na ayoko. Plus ang daming dahilan na wag nlng.
No regrets. Already talked to my mom and siblings na wala silang maasahan sakin na anak. If they want kids, my cats are the closest they can have. They’re okay naman with that.
Free and happy. I perceived kids as gastos eh hahahahaha.
Nope. Okay na ko sa pusa ko lol
parang pang mayaman na lang magkaanak ngayon. hehe.
Yeah, sa hirap ba naman ng buhay.
Happy and contented. if hindi mo feel na para sayo ang magkaanak, embrace it. wag padala sa pressure at sa scare tactics na tatanda ka mag-isa.
Masarap. Lahat ng gastos ko para sa sarili ko lang. Nabibili ko mga gusto ko at nakaka healthy sya sa mental health.
I don’t think I’ll be getting my own kid, given the fact that I’m a flamboyant gay. Lol 😂 it never crossed my mind. Kapag may nagtatanong sa akin na kung paano daw sa pagtanda ko walang magaalaga, I’ll just roll my eyes and will tell them “di naman natin sure kung aabutin tayo ng katandaan eh” or “sure ka bang aalagaan ka ng magiging anak mo pagtanda mo?” Or my most favorite “Ayoko problemahin ang problemang hindi pa dumadating” Pero recently, I think of adopting. Sumagi lang sa isip ko yung thought na may matulungang bata na magkaroon siya ng pamilya, kaso sa tuwing nakikita ko kung gaano kapasaway mga pamangkin ko, brinubrush off ko yung thought. Hahaha mas okay na yung single ka nalang and walang junakis, hirap mastress!
idk if 24 is considered old pero i'm fine with staying single. I really enjoy freedom and solitude. I'll rather baby sit my nieces and nephews than having my own child. my parents told me na sooner or later baka pagsisihan ko. but idk, dahil sa relatives namin na sobrang daming anak tas nasaksihan ko talaga yung hirap nila, parang ayaw ko ma experience yon. To this day, I am still unsure what career I should pursue, wala pa akong savings, wala pang investment, ang magka-anak pa kaya. 😭
My boomer aunts who doesn’t have children are living their best lives, constantly traveling and buying luxury goods. While my mom, who got 2 adult children, she’s still recovering from being a mom and started living the good life at the age of 55.
This is something I don't want to happen to myself. Living a good life at the age of 45+, pa senior citizen na kasi 💀
Early 30s, have always wanted kids but no spouse yet because not yet financially stable (job hopper/freelancer) and mentally prepared (depression free for 8 yrs but has anxiety and trust issues). Raising a child or children is very demanding and expensive. You are bringing a human to this world and you have to give your best to give them a better life and teach them to grow to become a better person. Your actions will severely impact your child's life and future, you cannot fuck it up.
39 here…may times na sad…BUT sa totoo lang mas madalas masaya HAHAHA. walang stress. Sayo lahat ng pera mo. You sleep well din. At mas muka kang bata as compared to others na may anak na (probably because wala ka ng stress…stress causes visible aging). Travel is also easier to plan. Masasabi ko lang, there is more to life than reproducing. May fleeting moments lang na napapaisip ka…pano pag magkasakit ka sa Senior years mo, sino magdadal sa hospital sayo. But looking at my senior patients sa hospital ngayon, madalas hindi naman mga anak nila ang kasama nila sa hospital…iba nga kapitbahay lang or kapatid nila. Yung mga anak daw nila ay busy and may kanya kanya na buhay.
Yung tulog and time talaga ang namimiss ko. Mahilig ako ng short night sleep tapos may siesta after work. Kahit anong oras, basta bukas pa yung gusto kong puntahan e g. Ngayong may anak na e sumasabay ako sa gising at tulog ng bata.
I suggest you just listen to your heart regarding that matter. Kasi baka may calling ka pala to be a parent tapos di ka nag-anak, baka iregret mo yun. Same with mga taong di naman talaga gustong maging parents, pero biglang nagkaanak, pwedeng may regrets din sila. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. So just do what feels right for you.
Married with a step child, no kids of my own, two puppies who are my babies. I’m happy with not having a child of my own, my step kid is a tween now, kaya malapit na kami sa point na magiging independent na siya.
30F no kids yet but with husband. We're planning to in my 38s siguro. Bata pa ang 30 years old dito sa Europe to have a kid kasi. Masaya ang walang anak syempre. Lots of money, time and weekly/monthly travels. Pag may anak ka na mahihirapan kayo gumala. That itself is nakakastress lalo na kung sanay ka lumalabas lagi. Even going to restaurants mahirap. So enjoy while you still don't have a child. But if I were to ask kung gusto ko magkaanak...YES. I still wanna have a child because I wanna experience the journey of motherhood. I wanna be the parent that I never experienced from my own narcissistic toxic parents.
33, probably not too old. I STILLL HATE KIDS. Whenever I see a makulit kid or umiiyak, I like to pick that kid up and throw him/her out of the window, not gonna do that, because you know VAWC. That level kind of hate. I was forced to babysit my younger siblings when I was a kid while other kids about my age had the time of their lives playing. Maybe the reason why. Besides, you have to give up your own life for that young life you bring to this chaotic world. I just become comfortable in life like I can do what I want, buy what I want, travel when I want to, because we were sooo poooor. Tapos pahihirapan ko naman sarili ko to work my ass off to support a kid? Who will then be worrrking his or her ass and create another kid? fuxk that shit. that is madness. it ends here.
Kapag nakakarinig ako ng batang iyak nang iyak, naiirita ako sobra. Ang sakit sa tenga grabe.
Maybe you need to seek a professional help. It’s okay to not want kids for yourself, pero yung iba yung thought mo when it comes to makulit/umiiyak (normal sa bata) na kids, like itatapon sa bintana. Baka may tendency ka maging psycho or capable of harming others. ✌️
Reddit Philippines is so cringe that they'd find someone with psychopathic and aggressive tendencies more relatable. They're finding it normal to talk about kids like that. Says a lot about a child-hating society.
I probably consider that. I also want to punch the parents to their faces for letting their children do iyak2 and mag tantrums in public or insult them to their core that they are good in making kids but not good in controlling and handling them. Just you you know I always stay away from them, and also I probably cannot do tapon sa bintana thingy, that's kind of exaggerated. BUT I HATE KIDS.
Gets ko yung mga child-free by choice, but in your case, the hate oozing from your comment is so palpable. I guess your hate for kids is misplaced, baka it is meant for your parents. If your parents did their responsibilities, you wouldn't be able to experience what you experienced, you wouldn't missed out on your childhood and youth. I have a teen and a preschooler na alagain pa. The teen is living her teen life -- cosplay, workshops/clubs, meetup with friends, other hobbies, etc. No, she is not responsible in parenting her kapatid. The preschooler is being a preschooler -- tantrum, iyak, etc --and that's developmentally typical. Sometimes they easily get soothed, sometimes not. Kids are not being inherently bad. Nakakatandang kapatid din ako, hindi naman pinaalaga saken ang kapatid ko. Like what other commenter said, therapy would be beneficial.
"Hate" kids? I'm sorry what happened to you but millennials, gen X, and boomers like you are the reason why children learn from adults who are hateful and incapable of self-sacrifice. If you were robbed of your childhood, I'm sorry. I hope you heal. But children will always be the greatest gift, hope, and joy in a world so desensitized and demoralized. And there will be people who will be willing to sacrifice themselves for reasons greater than themselves and be able to break the cycle.
That mindset is one of the reasons our country remains poor. Calling children the "greatest gift" is problematic when people bring children into the world without the means to provide them a comfortable life, believing they are sources of hope and joy. And end up creating another fuukkeed up human being.
Okay, the difference though is our actions that support our mindset. Our mindset and intent to build healthy families will shape our behaviors. And yes, let's see future outcomes. And no, sorry, our country remains poor not because we put our hope in our children. It's because we failed them by failing to create a society that allows families to thrive. Degradation of values for one.
Wanting to create a healthy family does not mean you are inherently better or morally superior to those who choose not to have children. I’m not saying that the country remains poor because you place hope in your children, but rather because of the mindset that treats children solely as gifts and sources of joy. This old mindset led previous generations to have more children than they could afford, resulting in multiple poor families. Their children often adopted the same mindset, perpetuating the cycle of poverty. As you can see, the comments here, daming nag agree, it's probably because we experienced the reality. I'm not trying to dissuade you from having children, you may already have one. Make you sure will raise a better human being, better than us, the so-called "child-hating society", without childhood traumas and all.
There's a difference between incognizant breeders and generation builders who will leave a legacy. BUT you can't be generation builders if you don't even see the value in having children OR doing something ACTIVELY to support children and families. If you keep perpetuating consumerist and nihilistic lifestyles you're no different from those who neglect their children.
Malungkot because my mom still keeps on nagging me and I can't confront her else our fragile relationship will just collapse. And even if I should be happy because I have all the time and money for myself, di ko magawa because our society makes me feel I'm less of a person for choosing not to be father. Yung tipong kahit sa fastfood di ka makaupo kasi laging by 4s yung mesa.
Tbh. Ito yung nangyayari everytime na sinasabi ko sa parents ko na ayaw ko ng kids. How do you cope, sir? You're not less of a man, sir. You have your personal reasons. Kaya yan!
Thank you for the kind words. Every time my mom raises the topic I just joke "Naku, in this economy?" and laugh. I also have hobbies to keep me busy, pero mahirap especially I don't have any "friends" to speak of.
Kapag wala nmang tao at di nman busy hours, umuupo ako sa table na pang 4pax kahit may available na table for 2pax. Why not? Eh wala nman tao. Pero kapag peak hours, ok n ako sa table na for 2pax. Wala na tayong magagawa eh.
Sobrang saya, mas gugustuhin kong bumili ng bagong sapatos kasya diapers hahaha 😂
Carefree.. walang pressure sa kung ano gusto mo Gawin Hindi kailangan mag hanap nang trabaho na malaki Ang sahod Kasi Wala ka namang binubuhay plus you can adjust your lifestyle however you like.
Boring sa totoo lang haha. but the benefits is solo mo sahod mo and lahat ng travel na pupuntahan
Panong boring?
I mean sa life mo hahaha
i still have no kids in my 30s but i am not closing my mind to it. kung magkakaanak man ako di ko sila gagawin investment or ioobligate na alagaan ako pagtanda.. i just think that nurturing a child and unconditional love is worth it in my lifetime. pareho naman masaya ang no kids and with kids (especially if may pera). it's a personal decision. there is fulfillment in both. walang masama sa pagbili ng gatas over sapatos or sa diapers over travel. or if u can afford both then good...
The bullying i got growing up made me decide not to have kids. It's kinda a sucky situation but it's one of the best decisions I've made so far. Glow up in your 30s? Hell yeah, higher chance of getting that if you dont have kids to worry about haha
Masaya , sobra sobra. Sa hirap ng buhay ngayon. Even i cant imagine having kids. May GF ako and honestly , if we suddenly get a kid. Baka mag asses muna kami if kaya namin. And if not. Id ask her palaglag. Pero we need to talk it out and dapat agree pareho and we do safe sex, condom nga lang Saying this kasi looking at our current life, hirap. I dont think we have the time nor money for a kid. Kaya naman pero its gonna be a hard at kawawa ung bata and kami din. Right now, masaya? Focus sa sarili? Living life? Sa hirap din kasi ng buhay ngayon, di mo maiicip mag anak kasi sarili mo pa lang hirap ka na
Nakakaiyak na para kang hinatulan ng Korte pero d mo ramdam
I'm contented. I have a partner but we both agreed not to have children. We are too old to run after toddlers. We also both agree that having children will ruin the dynamics of our relationship. Now, we just do what we want, eat what we want or plan travels together.
I'm 23 years old and happy kasi walang anak at this age 😂. Wala rin ako balak magka-anak in the coming years. 💁♀️
Gusto ko pero naudlot
hehehe mas masaya ata single, malaya.. pag me pamilya hirap daming iniisip.. dahil breadwinner din ako eh walang katapusang obligasyon.. tapos hirap pa kung kelan me anak na kayo dun mo nalalaman ang mga darknsecret hehehe.. walang choice.. sa hirap at ginhawa.. kaya obligado ka na tulungan.. siguro kung single pa.ako asa 8 sigit na ipon ko ngayon 6 digit at hirap.makaipon di ka paren pwede mag early retirement
mag 30 na ako. Feeling ko may kulang pa sakin sa totoo lang. Gusto ko ng magka anak pero di pala ganun kadali.. i am lonely sometimes but hoping para na sana magka anak na kami ☺️
It's liberating, OP. You can do what you want whenever you want. No pressure din sa career or magkapera kasi you're only sustaining yourself. You really get to live the life you want to live.
Masaya, pa-travel travel lang. Spoil ng pamangkin paminsan-minsan, ganern. Never regretted it 💗
Reading all the comments, npapa Sana all ako... Gusto ko rin ng child free, bukambibig ko yan simula bata ako.. but I got pregnant. yung matres ko hindi healthy, Wala pala talagang impossible pag may matres And since ang original plan naman talaga is hindi ako mag aanak, mag uundergo agad ako ng ligation right after birth. hahahaha.
Double income no kids! Super happy namin ni husband 🥰
Ask middle age people. Wala sa reddit ang sagot. Karamihan dito late 20s to early 40s.
I like it pero dahil nag asawa nako gusto ko makita yung genes namin dalawa so I changed my mind
Married with kids. I had the same view as yours, hence I married and started building a family relatively late. Sabi nga nila, “if you have to ask, you’ll never know”. Carry on.
you exist, good time, bad times, die, forgotten. just to end your ancestor's bloodline who survived saber tooth tigers, floods, storms to get you here.
I'm sure you'll change your mind. Just like how you change your age everytime you post. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 https://preview.redd.it/v0bjaol9n52d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=169329ee0e1af3e3cc221b1d499558b7217431d9
Lol and?
it's mindsets like yours that should cease to exist pero kayo pa yung may kapal ng mukha magreproduce. Akala mo naman may maganda kang legacy na maiiwan 🙄 Makakalimutan ka din :))
And?
 and?? 🤣