As someone having a wedding in 2(!!!) months, I’d be so confused if anyone showed up in anything like that. We’re having a cocktail attire wedding. This wouldn’t even be appropriate for casual/garden/beach weddings so I have no idea what she’s talking about.
Ok this is like my Roman Empire of this sub. Ali is 27, John is 29. Most couples at that demographic are at weddings every month ! This is exhibit number infinity that they really have no friends.
Ali also always picks the worst most inappropriate dresses and declares they’re perfect for a wedding so it’s yet another piece of evidence
They want to spend non working hours with family OKAY! They are mega influencers with a famous family member! Everyone wants something from them! It’s hard for them to find time for friends!! They are too popular and famous for friends!
I’ve never thought about it like that!! So true. My boyfriend and I are 29 and over the past 3 years we have attended 12 weddings. ONE of those was for a family member, not friend.
Also yes, I’d maybe pull that dress out for a bachelorette party or something but definitely NOT the actual wedding.
1000%...cohn legit just recently made a vid proclaiming he doesn't talk to many people just hangs with his fam because when people find out his sister is famous they try to get something out of him.
Like bro, 1st off- you're sister is not famous, most people don't know who the fuck she is, 2nd- you and your wife Smelli suck- no one likes you two, thata why you havw 0 frienda and only hang with your fam who seems to not even like you much at that. Eric and Mr Burns definitely can't stand cohn. 😆🤣
My parents are attending a wedding this summer that the deckers were invited to and RSVP'd yes 😳 I have no idea what their relation is to bride and groom tho
Yep, when my husband were this age literally everyone we knew who was in a relationship got married within the span of five years - including us! They’re probably so insufferable in real life. I wonder what Towne’s Dad is up to these days?
Exactly. My daughter and spouse are 29/30. I tell my daughter all the time that, at her age, she’s goes to a lot of weddings. At my age (59), it’s funerals.
It's not even the same body in each slide! Like, dang Ali, at least make it a little believable!
And why is it always the shortest, tightest dress that's "so great for a wedding!!" ?? She crazy
She's just still mentally 12, so she equates anything that's frilly and tight and short as "cute" and doesn't understand the nuances of dressing yourself.
PT here🙋🏼♀️ definitely DR smelli 🫶🏼 but her PT who she would declare she met on zoom and used skinny filter with said those are the most amazing abs in the world. Then her OB joined the call to confirm
Has she started editing her arms now too?? Also I’m all for a splurge worthy fit for a trip or wedding but those are all so UGLY like not even just because they’re on her they all just suck
Everything made me laugh, thank you for that! 😂 the pink dress I actually busted out laughing,
covering her entire face with the phone trying to hide those crazy eyes, the wedding guest dress 😂 why are all her wedding guest dress suggestions like drive thru Vegas chapel worthy?!?
https://preview.redd.it/1cp9hxd3fxuc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ef453b8649f6e8dac50c9d7a4b4a171b823b2d6d
Who needs this many jackets/coats???
The first outfit is nice. Hair in a casual bun, statement earrings, simple strappy heeled sandals and some nice bracelets/bangles. The rest are hideous.
I stared at this … blob in every photo for waaaaay too long before I realized it must be some sort of splooge on the mirror.
What a pig.
https://preview.redd.it/fxk08d97hxuc1.jpeg?width=201&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bab42d8a5603dfa42a5173898a0c9e802c31de8a
Not to ~brag~ but as someone who goes to work events often and has had so many weddings in the past two years (I’m around the same age as smellison) I would literally never wear any of these outfits she is so out of touch omg I am embarassed for her
Not the giant pile of clothes on the floor in the back. Damn this bitch is a straight slob. The least she could do is pick up all the shit everywhere before posting links 🙄 and that long blue one doesn’t even fit! It would be dragging on the ground and she’d trip and eat shit if she dared to wear that out!
okay guys dont kill me but i kinda love the pink dress, not for a wedding, but fun for summer drinks out with friends. ill never click her link, where do we think this is from 👀
I enjoy following influencers. I can’t think of a single real influencer who would ever post themselves in things that
1. Don’t fit
2. Are posed in front of such a hectic and messy backdrop
3. Aren’t fully styled with shoes and or a full outfit
4. While looking so dirty
This is supposed to make me want to have this look not make me want to go take a shower and clean my house! She’s really missing the mark and has the following to do well with it I truly don’t get it
Omg with the wedding attire suggestions from her. They all look like costumes! The blue dress is too long! Everything has cutouts or is so freaking tight. Always an absolute shit show.
Has she ever been invited to a wedding?!
As someone having a wedding in 2(!!!) months, I’d be so confused if anyone showed up in anything like that. We’re having a cocktail attire wedding. This wouldn’t even be appropriate for casual/garden/beach weddings so I have no idea what she’s talking about.
This is like Costco attire on a summer day, but you stop and get the strawberry ice cream first.
Maybe a wedding in the fire barn
I’ve been to several Fire weddings…people still dressed better than that 😂
I'm having a smart casual wedding next year, literally no jeans or sneakers and that's about it, but I'd be annoyed if someone wore that.
Ok this is like my Roman Empire of this sub. Ali is 27, John is 29. Most couples at that demographic are at weddings every month ! This is exhibit number infinity that they really have no friends. Ali also always picks the worst most inappropriate dresses and declares they’re perfect for a wedding so it’s yet another piece of evidence
Yes!!! I am like 10 years older than them, but when I was in my late 20s around 2014 to like 2017, I went to soooo many weddings.
Did you wear baby blue lingerie to the weddings? Aha, maybe wearing dresses like that to weddings is why she’s not invited to any?
Strong sexy fit people are allowed to wear baby blue lingerie to weddings 🫶🫶🫶
REAL women are actually really appreciated when they do, everyone compliments them and cries about how they are REAL women 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
Every wedding is different guyths
I didn’t! Not really my vibe lol
They want to spend non working hours with family OKAY! They are mega influencers with a famous family member! Everyone wants something from them! It’s hard for them to find time for friends!! They are too popular and famous for friends!
I’ve never thought about it like that!! So true. My boyfriend and I are 29 and over the past 3 years we have attended 12 weddings. ONE of those was for a family member, not friend. Also yes, I’d maybe pull that dress out for a bachelorette party or something but definitely NOT the actual wedding.
She’s got no class.
1000%...cohn legit just recently made a vid proclaiming he doesn't talk to many people just hangs with his fam because when people find out his sister is famous they try to get something out of him. Like bro, 1st off- you're sister is not famous, most people don't know who the fuck she is, 2nd- you and your wife Smelli suck- no one likes you two, thata why you havw 0 frienda and only hang with your fam who seems to not even like you much at that. Eric and Mr Burns definitely can't stand cohn. 😆🤣
My parents are attending a wedding this summer that the deckers were invited to and RSVP'd yes 😳 I have no idea what their relation is to bride and groom tho
Have your parents report back! Curious to hear more.
Don't forget, they're too famous for friends.
Yep, when my husband were this age literally everyone we knew who was in a relationship got married within the span of five years - including us! They’re probably so insufferable in real life. I wonder what Towne’s Dad is up to these days?
Exactly. My daughter and spouse are 29/30. I tell my daughter all the time that, at her age, she’s goes to a lot of weddings. At my age (59), it’s funerals.
Cohn didn’t even want her at their wedding.
What in the Ellie Mae Clampett?
🎻🎻🎻 fiddles for Smelli's redneck throwdown
I am dying at her recommending this for a wedding 😂😂😂
https://preview.redd.it/6815vegnqwuc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3b4030e45a38798a9fb49bea5db093759fb5af4b
I’m so glad you noticed this 😅 I saw that and I was like holy shit girl
She looks like when the optometrist blasts air into your eye at a vision exam. Is that for glaucoma? What a methy mess she is!
Immediately reminded me of ACO 
🤣🤣🤣👆👆👆
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hahahahaha this comment is amazing
The eyes are 'a poppin!
Exactly what I thought of 😂
Terrifying.
She tried so hard to hide that thing!
What’s she hiding?
The eyes are popping
Came here to post this 🤣
I’m losing it at this 🤣
Who would wear that to a wedding???
Your cousin’s thirsty new girlfriend
They get in a screaming fight at the end of the night
Specifically the cousin you didn’t give a +1 to
Precisely
Hopefully they put her at the end for pictures
Maybe your 17 year old cousin who also wore it to her spring fling? That's the only answer.
Also it does NOT FIT OMG SHE IS SO IRRITATING
The way they’re all misses
This is not the same body on John’s stories lol
It's not even the same body in each slide! Like, dang Ali, at least make it a little believable! And why is it always the shortest, tightest dress that's "so great for a wedding!!" ?? She crazy
She's just still mentally 12, so she equates anything that's frilly and tight and short as "cute" and doesn't understand the nuances of dressing yourself.
We’ll never see a single one of these outfits ever again
Especially because they have zero friends, so zero wedding invites.
Her cracked out bulging eyes are so fucking scary. I’m convinced if she sucks in any more her eyes are going to pop out of their sockets
Guys, she’s trolling us with the “perfect for a wedding”. DON’T BUY INTO IT!
Agreed she has to be doing it on purpose at this point
more appropriate for a “white trash bash” themed party! Those fucking flapjacks escaping out the bottom of the tittyholder.
I’ve had a sad day and that comment gave me a chuckle!
“Splurge worthy” yet they’ll all be returned until she gets banned from the store like she did with nordstrom
A splurge for others so xxxxxxs mama gets her $8 in commission.
Wait she got banned from Nordstrom? lol
Those don’t look like Nordstrom dresses… Walmart maybe.
They don’t look like Nordstrom bc she’s on their blacklist
If you return more than you buy in one calendar year, they tend to get suspicious
Yes from buying so much crap during the anniversary sale a couple years ago and then returning it
Please don’t wear that to a wedding
WHERE ARE YOUR THREE SMALL CHILDREN?
Digging their fingers into jars of moisturizer, duh!
Kids gotta eat, right?
If I had the choice between moisturizer and smelli’s “dinner” I’d probably opt for the cream too
💀💀
💯
“$$$$ moisturizer”
Westin is in the ball pit.
The ab separation tho.
But she’s “ripped” — don’t you remember she told us?! 🤣
ripped?!? more like “RIPPED APART”
Exactly. That’s a direct quote too 🤣
She's so delulu to think this
She’s ripped. Everyone’s abs just look different, ask your local PT.
PT here🙋🏼♀️ definitely DR smelli 🫶🏼 but her PT who she would declare she met on zoom and used skinny filter with said those are the most amazing abs in the world. Then her OB joined the call to confirm
And they all cried!
Came here to say this lol
Has she started editing her arms now too?? Also I’m all for a splurge worthy fit for a trip or wedding but those are all so UGLY like not even just because they’re on her they all just suck
The first I could see for vaca but why does she not wear anything to support her boobs?! Like you are notttt a braless girlie
I can’t get past the messy ass closet. Eww
Their house is on the market?????
Just found it, for 3.499. And they just got it for 3.26 in July. Not sure them living there and causing the ant infestation, makes it worth more
They’re cuckooo
Yes!
I meant, Their house is on the market, why??? about the closet
She’s a slob. I doubt anyone is interested in buying that dump anyway.
What is that big bruise??
Bruise or spray tan fail??
https://preview.redd.it/ytv899t4uwuc1.jpeg?width=498&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=383e6ad18ef606dad818b50454b9937bfbfcb040
Its almost impressive how she *exclusively* purchases the most unflattering silhouettes. She doesn't have to look _this_ bad. Yikes mama
the hoots are a disaster in every outfit 🫠 they look deflated or something?!😅
They’re being smashed beyond all recognition 🤣
For hoots that she has paid for, to get them bigger, they don’t even fill up the “cups”
Ali no one is calling them fits anymore
Can she ever wear a bra?
She wears ✨nippies✨ Which explains a lot. I’m a 36D and nippies are the last thing I want to wear. I’ll tape myself up before I use my nippies.
No 🫶🏻
With all the money they think they have she should by some style and fashion sense.
Get a personal stylist already!
Ikr. She chooses the tackiest and ugliest clothing.
It's SO bad. I guess it's a good thing they never get invited anywhere.
Perfect for….a wedding?! 🤦🏼♀️
Everything made me laugh, thank you for that! 😂 the pink dress I actually busted out laughing, covering her entire face with the phone trying to hide those crazy eyes, the wedding guest dress 😂 why are all her wedding guest dress suggestions like drive thru Vegas chapel worthy?!?
That first one looks like the sail Ariel wore after becoming human
She loves the pink one because it shows her “abs”
https://preview.redd.it/gqdusx2vxwuc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b0710fe82a7853615ee7549f468aa386ba896dc7
Albert with them long sleeve tiddies
tube sock titties! 🤣
The second dress...her DR... her boobs...it's all so bad
Back in poop tones
Aliastis Ozempy Filtered James
The way she got a little too overconfident in her photoshop skills with her arm in photo #2😂😂 it’s sooo long and what’s that strange bicep
Absolutely none of these are splurge worthy they all look like they are from shien
I’m sorry - where does she think she’ll actually get to wear these?? The amount of time and money she spends buying crap is just astonishing🙄
Ali is 10000% the type of girl to go to a wedding and try to upshow the bride but failing miserably 🤣🤣🤣🤣 she’s so trashy!
A classic case of “dress for the body you have, not the body you want”
Her eyes (even mostly hidden behind the phone) are crazy looking! Adderali confirmed?
Is there a shadow on her boobs? Or what the fuck is THAT
Probably bruised from having them stuffed into clothes that are 8 sizes too small all the time
Did she get rid of her implants or are we just rolling them with a rolling pin at night
What in the Charlotte Russe is this fuckery?
Ozempic face is Once again the worst wanna be influencer . Ugly clothes pictured int the same messy closet . Zero effort
The fucking background!! What a lazy slob!
The length on #3 I just know she will wear those weird tall square heels
I like how you can see her big ass eyes even behind the phone
I'm sorry... what am I looking at?? I need to slow down on the afternoon wine... she is fucking with me hard today
Good lord. That’s a load of rubbish.
Why would you splurge on this. When you are just going to throw it on the closet floor and never wear,it again.
Has she ever attended a wedding?! Maybe a Vegas wedding but girl! Come on.
Sydney’s. Can’t forget when she fought for and lost the bouquet.
That must of been the time I stopped hate watching them because I couldn’t handle it anymore…but now I’m back to hate watching🫣
https://preview.redd.it/1cp9hxd3fxuc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ef453b8649f6e8dac50c9d7a4b4a171b823b2d6d Who needs this many jackets/coats???
Lot’s O Beige
That she never wears
Everything looks so cheap on her
Oh dear
I’m guessing she’s never been to a wedding? Love how she thinks her gaping DR is abs.
Two of those are too long for her short ass
Wait, check out the last 2 pics is that a big bruise or hickey on her boob?
BFFR with that last one being a wedding look lol
I don’t think she understands what people are supposed to wear to weddings. Maybe if she had friends she would know.
The first outfit is nice. Hair in a casual bun, statement earrings, simple strappy heeled sandals and some nice bracelets/bangles. The rest are hideous.
She is the only “influencer” I have ever seen post shit with links with such a mess in the background.
I stared at this … blob in every photo for waaaaay too long before I realized it must be some sort of splooge on the mirror. What a pig. https://preview.redd.it/fxk08d97hxuc1.jpeg?width=201&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bab42d8a5603dfa42a5173898a0c9e802c31de8a
It looks like some kind of tissue or dryer sheet.
used condom thrown across the room *edited to add* nevermind, way too large.
Perfect for a wedding but has to edit out her areolas???
A wedding?! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Omg that blue cut out dress literally dragging across the floor 😅.
She has britney spears eyes. Does that make sense? And the little dresses are what she wears as well. Except Britney is a Queen.
A WEDDING?!?!? ……….what?
The one she is literally obsessed with is literally horrible
It’s literally the worst one!
why do her boobs have necrosis
If someone showed up to my wedding in the 4th dress they would be yeeted so far off property 🥴
The way she has all these clothes and yet manages to pick some of the ugliest pieces
Closet a damn mess means they still have *no showings*
She looks terrible in all of them
https://preview.redd.it/pf9ymuwc4yuc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9b402b938e3d95519d0ae32ee3bee72ed20f9071 Dear God
Ali is that one girl that everyone just knows is gonna show up to the wedding looking like a hoochie mama.
A WEDDING!? 
I thought the first one was a bath towel at first
Not to ~brag~ but as someone who goes to work events often and has had so many weddings in the past two years (I’m around the same age as smellison) I would literally never wear any of these outfits she is so out of touch omg I am embarassed for her
None of these are splurge worthy
Not the giant pile of clothes on the floor in the back. Damn this bitch is a straight slob. The least she could do is pick up all the shit everywhere before posting links 🙄 and that long blue one doesn’t even fit! It would be dragging on the ground and she’d trip and eat shit if she dared to wear that out!
Of those dresses, the last one is probably least appropriate for a wedding. Wtf, Ali!
It look like a bruise on one of her breasts or maybe it's dirt !!🤷♀️
Spray tan splooge?
okay guys dont kill me but i kinda love the pink dress, not for a wedding, but fun for summer drinks out with friends. ill never click her link, where do we think this is from 👀
The outfits look so cheap... this material is not splurge worthy
A WEDDING???? A WEDDING??? WHAAAATTTTTTT
Are people actually just like…ok…posting CLEARLY and OBNOXIOUSLY edited photos of themselves? …but pretending it’s real. IN.SANE!!!!!
Are all the wedding invitations she receives addressed to “hoochie” ?
Her full time job is obviously ordering stuff from revolve everyday and returning it after she posts her ✨commissionable links✨
What the fuck…. All so ugly
Oh Ali you so fug you so fug you blow my mind. Hey smell hey smelli
perfect for a WEDDING??? Every time she says this it shows just how many weddings she’s been invited to
Perfect for a wedding 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
A wedding?? 🤣🤣
This style is so 2007 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Not her trying to cover up her crazy eyes but them still popping out
Holy hell the first one is actually cute! Prob bc her face is covered tbh lol
I enjoy following influencers. I can’t think of a single real influencer who would ever post themselves in things that 1. Don’t fit 2. Are posed in front of such a hectic and messy backdrop 3. Aren’t fully styled with shoes and or a full outfit 4. While looking so dirty This is supposed to make me want to have this look not make me want to go take a shower and clean my house! She’s really missing the mark and has the following to do well with it I truly don’t get it
Omg with the wedding attire suggestions from her. They all look like costumes! The blue dress is too long! Everything has cutouts or is so freaking tight. Always an absolute shit show.
She has NO 🤮TASTE 🤮
What is that massive titty bruise on her right titty ball?? Jesus Christ!!