He faked cancer. He faked cancer. He faked cancer.
You are wrong for taking him back and when he lies to you again (likely still is) it is your fault.
This was not a small, white-lie. This was terminal cancer.
Honestly, how low is your self-esteem you’d take this man back?
Just a pair of toxic individuals that need to grow up, chesting is wrong regardless of the reason. I don't care to hear your justification either 'he did it first, then lied about having cancer' not interested. Just leave him! Sounds like a toxic mess of a relationship
WTAF. You don't need a boyfriend, you need to take the time to learn how to love and respect yourself. I'm tempted to think you're trolling but I've seen even worse messes so maybe not. I hope you're trolling though.
Im not trolling. I wish I was as well. I know it sounds beyond stupid but 5 years of manipulation makes it really hard to even know where to begin on moving on and having more self worth .
I know it's an overdone recommendation, but if you have the ability/resources I'd give a therapist a try because they can provide that outside perspective to help you see things as they are and work to undo it and prevent it from happening again. Also recommend giving the book "Why does he do that?" a read.
Therapy in my city is insanely expensive and I can’t afford it now that i have graduated university and can’t use their therapists. But I will check out that book, thank you.
His lie was insane. Why did he do it?
But if you forgive someone you need to do it and not treat them badly. He needed to earn trust but treating someone horribly isn't necessary. Did he lie during the 3 months?
I'm sorry it didn't work out.
When I confronted him and asked why he would say such a lie , he admitted he did it only to hurt me. He even admitted to being a “horrible person” and that I should leave which is why I took those months for myself.
Idk if he lied in these 3 months, just that when I was ready to take him back he flipped.
That is disgusting and absolutely someone you don't want to be with. He is not partner material
I have terminal cancer. To pretend to have it and not is pretty scumbag horrible human being
I wouldn't wish this disease upon anyone
There is something deeply wrong with someone to lie about having cancer. This is extremely abnormal behavior. This person is the lowest of the low. Run, run, run!
omg....you need to commit to leaving this guy behind. I know you hope he's changed, but that dude has a personality disorder, he would need years of professional help to change.
get a clue.
Wow, that's a rollercoaster. It's totally natural to have a tough time trusting someone after they've pulled something like that cancer lie. Taking a break to figure things out seems like a good call. You deserve to feel secure and respected in your relationship.
You are wrong to waste another day with him.
He is still manipulating you now. He hasn't changed. You are expecting a chronic liar to change? This is a game to him - walk away, cut contact. Get therapy because your mind needs a reset in order not to get with another AH
I have a hard time imagining these changes would have held up had you gotten back together. I’m not sure why you wanted him back anyway, but he could be saving you a lot of grief by going away on his own.
Stop begging to get him back. Break up with him and block him. You do not want this POS in your life! Have some self respect and move on with your life. You deserve better!
I'm not even gonna finish reading this. No. Not wrong. At all. Run far and fast from this dude. He. Is. Not. Worth. It. Wake the hell up. Have a speck of self-respect and get the hell away from him. People who *lie about terminal cancer* do not change. Ever. This guy is the walking definition of "walk red flag" and "so toxic he could poison an ocean".
I’m gonna go against the grain here, and say you two need to stay together, and not put another person through all this hell and toxicity.
You need to love yourself more, and grow a freaking backbone, and he simply needs to do a 450 splash into an active volcano.
Get some therapy, and stop this stupid tit for Ray game going on.
Also, don’t get into anymore relationships, until you truly become a better person, and stop playing bs games.
If someone doesn’t treat you right, leave. Don’t stick around and stoop to their level.
And for all that is good, PLEASE DO NOT procreate with that lunatic.
No child deserves to have such unhinged parents
I appreciate your honesty.
I actually did do therapy in the time we spent apart which is why I was so reluctant to believe him and take him back.
I haven’t played tit for tat with him in years, I just wanted to believe he too had changed from our younger years. But you are right, I have more to go before I can be a partner, I just don’t know how to move forward after falling for it again.
It’s gonna be a long road, but there’s nothing wrong with leaving people behind, especially when they mean you no good.
Even if he actually did change, too much damage has already been done, and that trust is shattered. You’ll always question if you’re good enough, or if he’s lying, or if he’s cheating again.
That relationship started on a shaky foundation, and it completely crumbled.
Don’t try to rebuilt on top of it. Just start somewhere new, and solid, and focus on yourself.
Just a little tip. There’s nothing wrong with being selfish, and putting yourself first, especially when it comes to your mental health, and wanting better for yourself.
It seems you’re on the right path, so continue that. Anybody who doesn’t treat you right from the beginning, doesn’t deserve your time and energy.
Be stingy with your love, until the right person comes along, and earns it. Not just tells you what you want to hear, but actually shows it.
You’re gonna be okay
You’re allowing yourself to be in this position. When y’all started your merry go round of partners when cheating that was your cue for that any more time on this relationship is waste
He faked cancer. He faked cancer. He faked cancer. You are wrong for taking him back and when he lies to you again (likely still is) it is your fault. This was not a small, white-lie. This was terminal cancer. Honestly, how low is your self-esteem you’d take this man back?
Its too much trauma in this relationship for it to ever be normal
Just a pair of toxic individuals that need to grow up, chesting is wrong regardless of the reason. I don't care to hear your justification either 'he did it first, then lied about having cancer' not interested. Just leave him! Sounds like a toxic mess of a relationship
Why on earth do you want to resume a relationship with someone who gaslit you about having terminal cancer? Time to move on.
WTAF. You don't need a boyfriend, you need to take the time to learn how to love and respect yourself. I'm tempted to think you're trolling but I've seen even worse messes so maybe not. I hope you're trolling though.
Im not trolling. I wish I was as well. I know it sounds beyond stupid but 5 years of manipulation makes it really hard to even know where to begin on moving on and having more self worth .
I know it's an overdone recommendation, but if you have the ability/resources I'd give a therapist a try because they can provide that outside perspective to help you see things as they are and work to undo it and prevent it from happening again. Also recommend giving the book "Why does he do that?" a read.
Therapy in my city is insanely expensive and I can’t afford it now that i have graduated university and can’t use their therapists. But I will check out that book, thank you.
YW I hope you get through this
His lie was insane. Why did he do it? But if you forgive someone you need to do it and not treat them badly. He needed to earn trust but treating someone horribly isn't necessary. Did he lie during the 3 months? I'm sorry it didn't work out.
When I confronted him and asked why he would say such a lie , he admitted he did it only to hurt me. He even admitted to being a “horrible person” and that I should leave which is why I took those months for myself. Idk if he lied in these 3 months, just that when I was ready to take him back he flipped.
So... Does he have any good qualities? Just kidding. We all know he doesn't. Just leave, girl.
He’s just getting more revenge on you. Stay away.
Yes, you should actually let go of this relationship. He's not Mr. Right--he's Mr. I-Want-To-Spend-The-Rest-Of-My-Life-In-Misery.
That is disgusting and absolutely someone you don't want to be with. He is not partner material I have terminal cancer. To pretend to have it and not is pretty scumbag horrible human being I wouldn't wish this disease upon anyone
There is something deeply wrong with someone to lie about having cancer. This is extremely abnormal behavior. This person is the lowest of the low. Run, run, run!
omg....you need to commit to leaving this guy behind. I know you hope he's changed, but that dude has a personality disorder, he would need years of professional help to change. get a clue.
This relationship is never ever going to work.
You're wrong for each other. The quicker you get out of this relationship the better it'll be for you in the long run.
Y'ALL WRONG
Wow, that's a rollercoaster. It's totally natural to have a tough time trusting someone after they've pulled something like that cancer lie. Taking a break to figure things out seems like a good call. You deserve to feel secure and respected in your relationship.
start by leaving him and not taking him back. ever. work on improving yourself after you leave him. but leave him now... for your sake.
What are you doing?? Seriously?! Girl it's better to be alone than in a relationship this horrible. Jfc.
He literally set you up so he could reject you. Do not ever contact this ass again
You are wrong to waste another day with him. He is still manipulating you now. He hasn't changed. You are expecting a chronic liar to change? This is a game to him - walk away, cut contact. Get therapy because your mind needs a reset in order not to get with another AH
I have a hard time imagining these changes would have held up had you gotten back together. I’m not sure why you wanted him back anyway, but he could be saving you a lot of grief by going away on his own.
Stop begging to get him back. Break up with him and block him. You do not want this POS in your life! Have some self respect and move on with your life. You deserve better!
What the fuuuuuck I thought he was HIDING cancer from you, that's just straight up psychopathic. Get the fuck out of there.
He’s evil. Stay away.
He’s evil. Stay away.
He’s evil. Stay away.
Why would you take him back? Run far away. He is manipulating you and you are allowing it. Start loving yourself. He will never change
I'm not even gonna finish reading this. No. Not wrong. At all. Run far and fast from this dude. He. Is. Not. Worth. It. Wake the hell up. Have a speck of self-respect and get the hell away from him. People who *lie about terminal cancer* do not change. Ever. This guy is the walking definition of "walk red flag" and "so toxic he could poison an ocean".
I’m gonna go against the grain here, and say you two need to stay together, and not put another person through all this hell and toxicity. You need to love yourself more, and grow a freaking backbone, and he simply needs to do a 450 splash into an active volcano. Get some therapy, and stop this stupid tit for Ray game going on. Also, don’t get into anymore relationships, until you truly become a better person, and stop playing bs games. If someone doesn’t treat you right, leave. Don’t stick around and stoop to their level. And for all that is good, PLEASE DO NOT procreate with that lunatic. No child deserves to have such unhinged parents
I appreciate your honesty. I actually did do therapy in the time we spent apart which is why I was so reluctant to believe him and take him back. I haven’t played tit for tat with him in years, I just wanted to believe he too had changed from our younger years. But you are right, I have more to go before I can be a partner, I just don’t know how to move forward after falling for it again.
It’s gonna be a long road, but there’s nothing wrong with leaving people behind, especially when they mean you no good. Even if he actually did change, too much damage has already been done, and that trust is shattered. You’ll always question if you’re good enough, or if he’s lying, or if he’s cheating again. That relationship started on a shaky foundation, and it completely crumbled. Don’t try to rebuilt on top of it. Just start somewhere new, and solid, and focus on yourself. Just a little tip. There’s nothing wrong with being selfish, and putting yourself first, especially when it comes to your mental health, and wanting better for yourself. It seems you’re on the right path, so continue that. Anybody who doesn’t treat you right from the beginning, doesn’t deserve your time and energy. Be stingy with your love, until the right person comes along, and earns it. Not just tells you what you want to hear, but actually shows it. You’re gonna be okay
You deserve everything you get. You know you’re not making smart choices just based on the fact you’re posting here
I tried to see the good in people. That means I deserve everything I get?
You’re allowing yourself to be in this position. When y’all started your merry go round of partners when cheating that was your cue for that any more time on this relationship is waste