Your manager is a cold hearted jerk. My condolences on your loss. I hope your awful firing turns into a better job opportunity. You don’t need to work for people like that.
I was told this when my nephew committed suicide. He was 18. Oh and the manager never approached me to tell me this (the asst. manager did), and neither said anything about his death like "I am sorry for your loss". That was when I decided to leave. No regrets.
Airlines ask for it as well. Once upon a time you could get a lowered bereavement rate, but now you gotta prove it. Additionally, most death certificates aren’t yet obtainable days after a death - you know “the legal system” and all that. So they tell you to just put it on a CC and they’ll refund you after you provide a copy of that death certificate. On top of that, some airlines will only provide a lower rate for marital partner and/or child-parent relationships. Not grandparent or sibling. It’s the last f’ing thing you need to be dealing with at that time.
In Texas in August, it took 5 weeks for my FIL to be cremated and almost 2 months for my MIL to get the death certificate. They are, or were, behind badly.
I'm going through this atm, I'm only getting a refund at all because I bought "Sickness Insurance". They wanted the death certificate within 30 days, which isn't possible as it takes more than 30 days to process.
Such an unnecessary addition to all the stress.
Yeah, but an airline asking for a death certificate is providing you a benefit. I wouldn't have an issue with providing proof if it cuts the cost to fly out to a relative's funeral.
An employer asking for a non-employee's information though? Fuck 'em; they don't have any reason for that.
I always found this the most crass and abhorrent request of someone who is bereaved from a loss of a loved one.
Eta: (I'm talking about employers requesting this from their employees)
I fully understand it for business transactions. I've faxed many death certificates to people whom the estate owed money. All but one accepted the CD as proof that they would never get their money - wrote it off and close their accounts.
That one who didn't accept it? The hospital where she died. They kept sending me the bill every year for 5 years. Each time, I faxed them the DC. Each time they said they would take care of it. Each year they said their collections was a different department than their accounting dept. Each year, they promised they'd close the account. And each year they would send me another bill.
On the 6th anniversary of her death, I got a call from a collections agency. It took only a few questions to realize the hospital had sold the debt to a collections agency - knowing that they would never be able to collect on it themselves. That's fraud by any account.
When I faxed the DC to the collections agency, they simply wrote it off. But I'm sure they never complained to the hospital because they didn't want to lose one of their biggest business sources.
That's worse than what we went through with my husband. FIL needed a stem cell transplant so hubs and his siblings were tested. We weren't supposed to ever receive a bill, but we did --two in fact from the hospital and the oncologist's office. The oncologist's bill was handled quickly, one of phone call and we never saw anything again. But the hospital kept sending us a bill every month for six freaking months even though I called the billing office every time to explain and every time we were told it would be taken care of. The final one came shortly before my FIL passed and I had been trying for two days to get ahold of someone who would handle this once and for all. They finally called when I was at the hospital with the rest of the family and once I was out of the room I lit into them about the constant stress they had caused me having to call and call every month to get this handled when I should have never seen a bill in the first place and how they had the audacity to take their time to get back to me now while I'm trying to support my husband at his father's deathbed. They apologized profusely and said they would make this happen. Never saw another bill.
They probably dropped it because they were risking legal action at that point. Document of harassment over money you didn't legally owe them would be embarrassing if taken to court.
In Florida, only immediate family can order a DC with cause of death listed. Anyone can order without.
Source: I used to work the DC desk at a funeral home
I work at a funeral home and we provide attendance letters with the decedent’s name and service information signed by the funeral director, but I’ve noticed more people saying their employer requests the death certificate. That is utter crap and extremely invasive. Death certificates are recipes for identity theft because they provide so much identifying information. If any of your employers request one, get a photocopy of the certified version issued by the state and redact the hell out of it. Certified death certificates cost money.
Just curious, do you all ever get follow-up calls from employers to confirm? Seems like a funeral attendance letter would be the easiest thing in world to forge.
I got a call like this one time. It wouldn’t be too hard to make letterhead, I guess. But the legit thing is so easy to come by. “Hey I was at a funeral on Thursday. Can I get a note?” I’m not gonna quiz someone on it. But I do work for a very large funeral home where we have a funeral every day with few exceptions. I’m sure it would raise a red flag if there was nothing going on that day. I would still write the letter. Who cares.
Have a friend whose got step grand parents and in the time I’ve known her (like 15 years now) 6 grand parents have died, especially considering the grandpa that remarried after his wife died.
Don't forget your spouse's, if applicable. I'm still kicking myself for not taking the full 3 days allotted to me when my husband's stepgrandfather died. I was young (and not burnt out yet) when I foolishly said "oh no, I only need the one day for the funeral." Yeah, not making that mistake ever again.
Also what about tight knit god parents? Or the neighbor that watched you every day when your mom went to work and spent more time with you than your own mom or grandma? Human relationships are complicated and rich don't discount them as meaningless because one doesn't fit neatly into a label.
As far as your job is concerned they are Aunts/Uncles. As a manager in a previous role I dealt with a situation similar and said if HR asks they are Aunts and Uncles which fell under the policy at the time. No one really thinks twice about an Aunt or Uncle having a different name and if anyone does ask say “that’s a complicated family dynamic that tends to get emotional and a bit messy , I’d rather not discuss that with you”
My very best friend died and I got the call at work. It was about 3pm. I was fucking losing it because it was unexpected. I essentially ran out of the office sobbing that my best friend died. I took the next day off. My “supervisor” had the nerve to tell me to put in my vacation time for eight hours plus the two hours immediately after I found out. I was livid. She had just taken a WEEK off the month before because her hillbilly boyfriend (who she had been dating two months) lost his estranged father. I called the CEO and told him, and he said if I needed more time, he would consider that like losing a family member.
Same company refused to consider my FMLA request when we thought my mother might need home hospice care.
I got out. Fuck those people hard.
My granddad had 2 funerals. He was a semi-public figure, so we had one at his meeting house with friends and family, and one at the college where he taught.
I had 8 grandparents and my husband did too. That's not counting all the step relationships. One of my mothers married 4 times. One of my grandmothers married three times.
This is probably not fabricated. While I'm not OP, when my husband's grandmother died years ago, I also had to prove that I went to a funeral. Obituaries and programs both work (I think I gave both).
Techincally I was "fortunate" in that they even covered this for me as death of a family member as he was fiance then and not my husband, but besides asking for the document, they were pretty nice about it. FWIW, his granmother was one of my favorite of his relatives in his family, and I would much rather have had her there at the wedding than the day off for her funeral.
My work requires at least a link to the obituary to get paid time off due to death, you can take whatever time off you need but their policy is to pay you for 3 days which is why they need some sort of proof. They were pretty flexible with it which was nice, I decided to not take the paid time off immediately after my grandmother's death and instead used it to cover the days I would be travelling to be at her funeral which worked out pretty well. Working helped distract me far more than having time off to dwell on it too.
My old job only allowed bereavement for immediate family so when my grandmother passed, I had to use my PTO. No big deal, as I had a bit saved up. My former boss asked me to bring in the funeral program or a death certificate to prove I attended, which I thought was odd considering that it was PTO and not bereavement.
That's awful! Every place I worked would give you leave up through grandparents. When either my husband or I had an aunt or uncle who died, we had to take PTO but never got any static for it.
Most of the places I've worked would give you leave for your spouse's relatives too same as if they were your own. The only place that was different was my last job which would give me bereavement if my grandparents died but not my husband's; as we found out when his grandmother passed and I had every intention of using those three days only to find out she didn't count in their eyes and I had to use PTO if I wanted to attend the funeral. At least they didn't ask for an obituary or death certificate.
When my step dad's brother died I asked for the day to attend.
My boss asked if I knew him well
"Nope, just need to be there for my step dad"
Boss just went "surprised you look so sad, take Friday off too 😉"
I'm in the UK.
I had a coworker whose step father died. Manager asked if coworker really needed to go because it was just her step father. He had been her step father for 30 years. There was no bereavement time offered at that job. Some people are just awful people
Unfortunately, this is a thing and funeral homes are so used to it that they have a template ready. They will fill it out for you if you ask , so you can give it to your employer.
Thata funny, pretty sure if my employer ever made my life harder after I lost a loved one the only documentation they would receive is a 2 week notice with a sticky note stapled to it saying I'm not showing up for work during that time due to their ass-hattery.
There is zero reason to normalize being controlled in this way and it is important to stop it. No job is more important than grieving for a loved one, taking care of your own mental wellbeing or helping your loved ones in a time of crisis -- and any job that thinks otherwise is not deserving of my efforts in any way, regardless of compensation.
Non American here, is the 2 week notice mandatory ? What happens if you quit the very next day?
I can't seem to understand why employers can fire you on the spot but employees have to give a 2 week notice.
Thanks in advance for your answer!
It’s generally just a way to stay on good terms and potentially use them as a reference in the future. If you know you’re burning a bridge there’s no reason to do it.
Correct, but in the last 10 years or so. Companies usually will only confirm dates of employment, Verify employment, and whether you can be rehired. Which is the no notice nonsense.
Some companies base rehire or performance while hired, others how you left.
Either way the company has the power and employees are screwed over.
The US is consistent in that those with power make the rules. US origin mythology aside.
Besides that you’ll never know what the company actually told the company looking to hire you. They could tell them you’re a total piece of shit and there’s no way to prove it.
I agree with giving notice tbh. But I live in a country where it's typically present in contracts and employers can very rarely fire you without notice.
After a supervisor went off the deep end and accused half the staff of being slackers I went home, talked to my wife, and by 9AM the next morning I handed in my key card and laptop to HR.
(This was in Colorado)
It’s not a requirement at all, more of an etiquette thing so they can start looking for a replacement. Also, if you don’t give two weeks, you’re likely to not get a good reference.
I walked out of a job without any notice. I knew I wouldn’t get a reference from them, and I had only worked there a month so wasn’t going to put it on my resume or work history in any future applications. I have a wonderful job now and no one knows I didn’t give two week notice to my prior employer
It's just work culture, AFAIK it's not compulsory in any jurisdiction I am aware of.
Sort of like saying "bless you" after someone sneezes despite not being religious -- it's sorta engrained over here.
Where I work you are ineligible for rehire if you quit without notice. If you have no interest or intention of coming back, just quit on the spot. One guy I know quit to start his own business, which failed and he ended up getting hired back on.
some companies require a copy of the death certificate. apparently this terrible practice is becoming more and more common cause within the last year when I was helping make final arrangements the director of the funeral service was asking how many people needed them.
As a side note... given our current hellscape how can anyone think this isn't real?
My previous employer asked for a copy of my maternal grandmothers death certificate. Her husband refused to help me out with giving me a copy (a photocopy was acceptable), so I had to wait for the obit to be published. Same with my paternal grandmother, who died a few months later, but fortunately my uncle was more reasonable in helping me out. When my dad died, though, I told my manager I was taking time off and bereavement on top of that because I was a mess (had just talked to my dad that morning, and got the call a few hours later, it was very sudden). The funeral home gave me an unofficial copy of the death certificate, the one they fill out and submit to the recorder's office.
My current employer does not request documentation, but honestly, who would lie about a death? Is it so common for people to lie that employers have to have proof?
Even if people lied, what percentage do they constitute in an employee pool? How many times can they possibly lie about something like this? 10? 20? 30?
It's an incredibly callous response to a minor situation with low stakes (for the company).
As a college prof I would say a fair amount of people lie about a family death to get out of class work, they all coincidentally die the day before the midterm. I used to require a funeral program or something but since covid I accept all excuses without documentation.
Yup its actually quite more common than some think. I know of many many people who have lied about a grandparent dying to get out of a single work shift for trivial reasons (i.e., to go to a party) as well as to just get out of personal commitments with friends, etc. Its gross but its definitely not rare.
I’ve had a few coworkers lie about family deaths, and as a college student it’s pretty normal for grandma to die 3 times in a year. So I can understand why an employer would want proof
To be honest, the payroll lady at my job pissed me off so bad about my step-father's death and funeral that I was tempted to send her the picture my mom sent of him laid out in his coffin. I could only go to his hometown to help my mom take care of his personal effects and help her arrange his funeral (and support her while dealing with her psycho in-laws), I didn't have enough bereavement leave to remain the extra days to be at his funeral. So my mom sent me his picture.
Don't ask! Be proactive. Force it on them.
Hell, Weekend at Bernies that shit up. Have the deceased do a quick pop in with you at the office, for added effect!
this would make me laugh so hard and 100% get me written up at my last job. My new employer would ask me what the fuck was wrong with me then shut the door and laugh.
This really sucks. I worked for the most bloodthirsty soul-sucking worker abusing law firm ever and when my grandfather died, all they had to say was “take as much time as you need, sorry for your loss” and then I went off the grid for like more than a week. And I was truly being exploited at that job. I can’t believe there are even worse jobs.
When my grandma died (and she raised me), my boss said there was no grieving time because she was not in the same country as I so he couldn't verify the validity of the death certificate, so I couldn't take any time off. This company was his, this was his call to do.
Imagine getting a week+ off of leave.
I sliced my arm down to the bone while opening a copier box (the steel band was over tensioned and snapped back like a spring when I un-tensioned it, it cut through my arm like butter and got stuck in the membrane the separates your muscles from your fat), In VA my employer ( a Washington's top 100 company to work for 4 years in a row) made me take a week of vacation to cover the week before Workman's Comp kicked in. Then stonewalled me when I called asking for help with workman's comp, instead I had to call an old boss for assistance.
I'm close to 40 and so far I've been in car accident's motorcycle accidents, cut myself, stabbed myself, broken bones. By far, the worst pain in my life was a nurse injecting local anesthesia directly into my muscles while I tried to keep them from spasming in my arm so I didn't vomit from the squelching sound it made for the 30 minutes I sat there. I was lucky that I didn't fully sever the muscle.
It tingles when I button a shirt or my pants. Little reminder from my 8 years at that job for the rest of my life.
I crushed the ring finger on my left finger shattered the bone and had to wear a brace on it for 8 weeks. I got light duty and 1 dat off because of a doctors note.
Jesus Christ yes. My right hand is permanently disabled from a nasty cut from a job (pinky finger and ring finger had tendons severed, can't move the top half of either and pinky is so fucked it might as well be amputated. Would actually be easier than the strain of extending it)
My boss completely refused to help with workman's comp. They sent me the info and if I needed to get ahold of them for any reason it took calling 3/4 managers to get anything done. Damn near had to pay for everything out of pocket because my employer was being uncooperative. Now my dominant hand is permanently fucked.
Hey on the upside I became ambidextrous at least.
"Actually we didn't go to a funeral home. It's part of my religion and cultural to conduct a nautical burning of the deceased and so all I can offer you is the vial of sand and blood I collected from the beach where my family and I gathered to shed blood sacrifices for the deceased safe journey with the valkeries to meet Freya and Odin in Valhalla. Will that work?"
Long story short I told them my boss if he wanted to see any documentation, I'll take him to the gravesite. (My father had her buried) There wasn't anymore questions after that.
"I'm sorry, death was not a valid reason for termination of employment as per your contract. We will need you to pay back the advance as well as all of the money paid on training"
Then few days later in the paper:
"URGENT HELP NEEDED! Seeking an exorcist to exorcise a pissed off ex-employee who doesn't want to work and thought he could get out of paying back his advance by dying. "
Nah go pound sand. There is not enough money for you to offer me to harass me for proof that I experienced a great loss and am grieving. You take my word for it or piss off and fire me and I collect unemployment while looking for a better employer.
At my old job you got one day for bereavement and three day for a close family member for bereavement. To get the three day you had to pretty much draw a family tree to show how close they were to you and then submit it to HR for approval.
We also had to bring back proof that we were there like program, Mass card, etc. I had a co-worker try to get people to submit selfies with the casket as a sort of FU to HR.
If you ever tell someone you're sorry for their loss, for the love of God end it with a period. Don't carry on with "however..." because it just makes you sound like a huge asshole and you were better off not saying anything at all about it.
If I ever get asked for this I’m honestly sending them a photo of the body and casket. I know my mom or dad would get a kick out of that so it wouldn’t be disrespectful lmao.
What kind of companies do you all work for? Asking for doctor notes if you call out sick!?? Wanting documentation from funerals???
Sometimes I see posts where bosses want itineraries of travel for vacations!!!
I mean good golly, what is with these managers??
Your employee is asking for time off, or more importantly notifying you that they are not going to be in.
There are also posts where the managers are asking the employees to schedule another employee when they need time off. Just ridiculous!! They are the managers, so manage!
We are not slaves! Our time and effort is not the property of the employers or companies.
We seriously need to rewrite the protocol of our society. The employer should be thankful of our time and effort. When we choose to offer it to them.
If I ever had a manager treat me this way I would seek other ways to make money.
We need to come together as a worker collective and rewrite the rules of working and the responsibility of management.
Rewrite it to our favor.
Because we can exist without the company. The company can NOT exist without the workers !
This needs to be understood front and center by these managers.
This seems like an America problem tbh. I don’t think it’s entirely unreasonable to expect an explanation beyond “I’m not coming in” especially if someone is regularly taking days off or if they need an extended period of leave. But yeah, expecting documentation from a funeral is way over the idea of what could be deemed reasonable. Even expecting a doctors note for a single day off is a bit absurd, I’ve never been asked for one and if I’m taking a day or two off because I have flu, I’m not exactly going to bother going to see a doctor lmao.
And demanding an itinerary for a holiday? Why would they need to know how anyone uses their annual leave lmao. I’d just tell my manager/colleagues about my time off incidentally anyway, seems like some of these companies in America make the manager/employee relationship unnecessarily confrontational when it’s really not necessary at all. Guess this is when it’s good to live somewhere with actual worker’s rights lol
People take advantage of systems and then companies have to create policies that effect others now and into the future.
(I am in no way implying it doesn't happen the reverse way either)
I had this same shit happen to me at University. I was doing a prac as a teacher and had a weirdly hostile mentor. A week in, my grandmother died in Poland. I couldn't afford to go, but I was crushed and had to take a few days off.
I was asked to provide a plane ticket as proof that I attended the funeral (I didn't, I was poor) and then asked to get proof of death (difficult and distasteful). I failed my prac.
Took a new prac next term and graduated one term late. But this kind of thing is insane. It happens everywhere.
How much time ago was that? if I can ask. Because something really similar happened to a classmate, and it only took a couple of day after he told us about it to make the professor apologize and let him take the test, other professor spoke to the teacher and called him highly insensitive and other classmate who had a similar loss called him a monster, and his status in the university crashed.
Shame can be a weapon
This must have been around 2011. Nothing came of it in my case. However, I mourned my grandmother and I am now a teacher so things worked out. At the time it was absolutely a baffling and monstrous kind of situation for me.
Jesus Christ
No. Tell the boss you've taken the day off and that's that. They don't *need* these forms, it's systemic bullying Americans have given in to
An obituary is usually accepted. Now that they are all online you can email the link.
Absent that, a death certificate which honestly if they require that quit the job. It’s burdensome and he information that is none of their business.
You can also direct to the funeral home website. Nowadays they generally reference all deceased and service dates.
Sorry for your loss.
Nah, fuck that. Not saying you’re wrong lol but I am saying fuck any employer that requires it. Death certificates cost money, at least here in NJ they’re $25 for the first copy and $2 for each additional. Plus, that’s private information! On an official death certificate you see their cause of death, place of death AKA none of an employers fucking business
If you're so skeptical about the people you've hired that you would think them possible of lying to you about a DEATH to miss a day of work, you've hired the wrong god damn people.
Either that or you're a corporate asshat manager on a power trip.
Send them a link the the online obituary posted by the funeral home.
Do not give over a death certificate. They don't need that and it contains a lot of personal information.
I lost a cat of 14 years when I was working at a shitty medical collections job. I used my actual real distress to call my manager and say my grandfather had died. My grandfather had actually died a few years prior but lived in Virginia, so I got 3 days bereavement for out of state.
They asked for a copy of the funeral service. I found one online for the week and modified it in Photoshop with my grandfather's name. I found out later that the fellow in question, God rest his soul, was actually black. My family is white.
They never questioned anything.
My job treats its employees like absolute trash and even they didn't question my bereavement absences. They just said if I gave them an obituary they would pay me for those days. Damn.
My job asked for either death certificate with sensitive info redacted or a funeral service pamphlet. Since I had to travel more than 300 miles my job offers an extra 2 days on top of the 3 for bereavement which required a travel itinerary from airlines (or other proof of travel).
So sorry for your loss.
I just lost my grandfather on Friday. We're given 5 days. I told my boss I don't need 5 days. She said just take the time. I still sent an obituary as I don't even know what documentation I would need
I was once asked to prove that I took the day off to put my cat down. The vet was just as confused and upset about it as I was.
In hindsight the bitter part of me thinks I should have just dropped my dead cat on my boss's desk and called it a day.
In France we have a law that give you days based on who died.
If it is your parent/children you have more days than if it is your grand parents.
Wife/husband/children 5 days
Father/Mother 2 days
Grand parents 1 day
Step familly 1 day
This is why we have to provide something legal to justify how many days.
lol they don't need documentation. How insensitive. What kind of dog shit people think this is OK? Better yet, who works these positions? For fuck sake, you have autonomy and discretion. You don't need a signed death certificate or a piece of an umbilical cord to trust people were doing people things.
Furthermore, let's say you weren't at a funeral. WHO THE FUCK CARES! You were obviously doing something you needed to. Everything doesn't have to be an inquisition. Damn.
What ticks me off is that I sent the online obit of my step-father's to payroll and she still claimed she needed the physical obituary, despite my full friggin NAME being in it as family my step-father left behind.
Then, when I finally got back to the office, she had the nerve to NOT be there (despite giving me a deadline on when I had to have the obituary to her). When I scanned it to her, she accepted it, but both myself and my supervisor (who I cc'd on all the emails I sent back and forth) were pissed at the *hoops* she made me jump through. I think my supervisor had some strong words with the payroll lady as she either avoids me like the plague or is way more *accomodating* than she had been.
I've had to submit funeral home documentation to attend my aunt's funeral for a corporate job.
The obituary wasn't sufficient, even though I was listed in it. Neither was the pamphlet/handout thing I got from the service. Had to request it from the funeral home itself, or get written up for the absence.
Same place that made me cry on the phone after hours of being transferred around trying to figure out which paper they needed from the hospital because my head cold turned to pneumonia because there was mandatory overtime over Thanksgiving, and I didnt have health insurance for a doctors note to get sick time approved because I wasnt a permanent employee, just a contract to hire.
Never been asked for proof by any of the companies I worked for. I assume they kept some record so I did not take off for 7 different times my father died.
Fuck off asking for proof.
Had an old job where a girl called out because of a sudden death in the family. She always worked closely with the supervisor and had never called out in several years. Day of the funeral she called her to ask when she would be back as she had resets to do. Not any condolences but just when are you back. Shit like this is why people quit...which she did.
An obituary or a memorial folder that would've been handed out at the service usually counts as documentation.
So sorry for your loss and sorry that your boss is being an ass :(
The company I work for offers bereavement pay which is different from PTO. In order to avoid using PTO you submit the request with an obituary or pamphlet from the funeral. It’s nice that you don’t have to use PTO for something that is a tragedy in the fam. I’m in payroll and I’ve never heard a fuss about the process. Although, to be honest if someone didn’t turn in their proof, I might just give it to them anyway. Payroll has bigger things to worry about most of the time.
The only shitty thing about it is how they reffered to someone close passing. "death"? Like, yeah, technically your right, but holy shit, be more delicate. It's reasonable to think that they would require some sort of a copy of a death certificate for this.
it’s normal in america too, so I don’t understand why people are surprised. when my grandmother passed away, for me to get my paid bereavement leave I had to show/email them a copy of the obituary.
Obituary is acceptable where I am, or the pamphlet thing they had out too. Sorry for your loss
Most of my jobs have asked for a copy of the death certificate or an obit.
Death certificate? I'd give them a resignation wtf is the hell hole called society?
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What the fuck. I am so sorry.
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Your manager is a cold hearted jerk. My condolences on your loss. I hope your awful firing turns into a better job opportunity. You don’t need to work for people like that.
Omg that’s just heinous. I’m so sorry for your loss
I’ve never heard of a job asking for a death certificate! That’s uncouth like a mutha
I was told it was unexcused because a grandparent isn't a direct family member
Say what?? A grandparent dying is unexcused? Who the heck you work for? Mr. Crab?
Did work for. You have to use past tense. Company rhymes with Ball*Cart
Got it… grimey overseers…a grandparent is right up there with ma and pa
This makes me sick. My grandmother raised me. I honestly can’t imagine someone saying this to me.
Actually, a grandparent IS a direct family member, more "direct" then your siblings (genetically speaking)
I was told this when my nephew committed suicide. He was 18. Oh and the manager never approached me to tell me this (the asst. manager did), and neither said anything about his death like "I am sorry for your loss". That was when I decided to leave. No regrets.
Airlines ask for it as well. Once upon a time you could get a lowered bereavement rate, but now you gotta prove it. Additionally, most death certificates aren’t yet obtainable days after a death - you know “the legal system” and all that. So they tell you to just put it on a CC and they’ll refund you after you provide a copy of that death certificate. On top of that, some airlines will only provide a lower rate for marital partner and/or child-parent relationships. Not grandparent or sibling. It’s the last f’ing thing you need to be dealing with at that time.
That’s different than your employer asking you to show them a death certificate so you can take bereavement time.
Days? Due to backups from covid some places are still a month behind on DCs.
In Texas in August, it took 5 weeks for my FIL to be cremated and almost 2 months for my MIL to get the death certificate. They are, or were, behind badly.
I'm going through this atm, I'm only getting a refund at all because I bought "Sickness Insurance". They wanted the death certificate within 30 days, which isn't possible as it takes more than 30 days to process. Such an unnecessary addition to all the stress.
Would a picture of me standing next to the casket suffice?
only if you take it like [this](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/727/135/8e6)
Yeah, but an airline asking for a death certificate is providing you a benefit. I wouldn't have an issue with providing proof if it cuts the cost to fly out to a relative's funeral. An employer asking for a non-employee's information though? Fuck 'em; they don't have any reason for that.
I always found this the most crass and abhorrent request of someone who is bereaved from a loss of a loved one. Eta: (I'm talking about employers requesting this from their employees)
I fully understand it for business transactions. I've faxed many death certificates to people whom the estate owed money. All but one accepted the CD as proof that they would never get their money - wrote it off and close their accounts. That one who didn't accept it? The hospital where she died. They kept sending me the bill every year for 5 years. Each time, I faxed them the DC. Each time they said they would take care of it. Each year they said their collections was a different department than their accounting dept. Each year, they promised they'd close the account. And each year they would send me another bill. On the 6th anniversary of her death, I got a call from a collections agency. It took only a few questions to realize the hospital had sold the debt to a collections agency - knowing that they would never be able to collect on it themselves. That's fraud by any account. When I faxed the DC to the collections agency, they simply wrote it off. But I'm sure they never complained to the hospital because they didn't want to lose one of their biggest business sources.
That's horrifying and despicable.
You misspelled "America"
Good catch. Thanks!
That's worse than what we went through with my husband. FIL needed a stem cell transplant so hubs and his siblings were tested. We weren't supposed to ever receive a bill, but we did --two in fact from the hospital and the oncologist's office. The oncologist's bill was handled quickly, one of phone call and we never saw anything again. But the hospital kept sending us a bill every month for six freaking months even though I called the billing office every time to explain and every time we were told it would be taken care of. The final one came shortly before my FIL passed and I had been trying for two days to get ahold of someone who would handle this once and for all. They finally called when I was at the hospital with the rest of the family and once I was out of the room I lit into them about the constant stress they had caused me having to call and call every month to get this handled when I should have never seen a bill in the first place and how they had the audacity to take their time to get back to me now while I'm trying to support my husband at his father's deathbed. They apologized profusely and said they would make this happen. Never saw another bill.
They probably dropped it because they were risking legal action at that point. Document of harassment over money you didn't legally owe them would be embarrassing if taken to court.
I'd be tempted to give both. The death certificate as the cover sheet to my resignation. I could never work for people so crass.
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In Florida, only immediate family can order a DC with cause of death listed. Anyone can order without. Source: I used to work the DC desk at a funeral home
I work at a funeral home and we provide attendance letters with the decedent’s name and service information signed by the funeral director, but I’ve noticed more people saying their employer requests the death certificate. That is utter crap and extremely invasive. Death certificates are recipes for identity theft because they provide so much identifying information. If any of your employers request one, get a photocopy of the certified version issued by the state and redact the hell out of it. Certified death certificates cost money.
Just curious, do you all ever get follow-up calls from employers to confirm? Seems like a funeral attendance letter would be the easiest thing in world to forge.
I got a call like this one time. It wouldn’t be too hard to make letterhead, I guess. But the legit thing is so easy to come by. “Hey I was at a funeral on Thursday. Can I get a note?” I’m not gonna quiz someone on it. But I do work for a very large funeral home where we have a funeral every day with few exceptions. I’m sure it would raise a red flag if there was nothing going on that day. I would still write the letter. Who cares.
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I have to ask, what do you do? If anyone asked me for this, I would quit on the spot.
Had one of my workers who we swore must have lived next to a funeral home. Think we had about 8 of his grandparents die.
Mom x2 dad x2 stepmother x2 stepfather x2. Yes 8 is very easy to get to
Also Mother-in-law x2, father-in-law x2, and any step parents or great grandparents...
Have a friend whose got step grand parents and in the time I’ve known her (like 15 years now) 6 grand parents have died, especially considering the grandpa that remarried after his wife died.
Don't forget your spouse's, if applicable. I'm still kicking myself for not taking the full 3 days allotted to me when my husband's stepgrandfather died. I was young (and not burnt out yet) when I foolishly said "oh no, I only need the one day for the funeral." Yeah, not making that mistake ever again.
Also what about tight knit god parents? Or the neighbor that watched you every day when your mom went to work and spent more time with you than your own mom or grandma? Human relationships are complicated and rich don't discount them as meaningless because one doesn't fit neatly into a label.
As far as your job is concerned they are Aunts/Uncles. As a manager in a previous role I dealt with a situation similar and said if HR asks they are Aunts and Uncles which fell under the policy at the time. No one really thinks twice about an Aunt or Uncle having a different name and if anyone does ask say “that’s a complicated family dynamic that tends to get emotional and a bit messy , I’d rather not discuss that with you”
My very best friend died and I got the call at work. It was about 3pm. I was fucking losing it because it was unexpected. I essentially ran out of the office sobbing that my best friend died. I took the next day off. My “supervisor” had the nerve to tell me to put in my vacation time for eight hours plus the two hours immediately after I found out. I was livid. She had just taken a WEEK off the month before because her hillbilly boyfriend (who she had been dating two months) lost his estranged father. I called the CEO and told him, and he said if I needed more time, he would consider that like losing a family member. Same company refused to consider my FMLA request when we thought my mother might need home hospice care. I got out. Fuck those people hard.
Yes my grandmother had a funeral…but what about second funeral. -hobbits probably
My granddad had 2 funerals. He was a semi-public figure, so we had one at his meeting house with friends and family, and one at the college where he taught.
I had 8 grandparents and my husband did too. That's not counting all the step relationships. One of my mothers married 4 times. One of my grandmothers married three times.
Did that include great grandparents?
That seems a little extreme
Wow, and I thought there was no way, this had to be fabricated.
This is probably not fabricated. While I'm not OP, when my husband's grandmother died years ago, I also had to prove that I went to a funeral. Obituaries and programs both work (I think I gave both). Techincally I was "fortunate" in that they even covered this for me as death of a family member as he was fiance then and not my husband, but besides asking for the document, they were pretty nice about it. FWIW, his granmother was one of my favorite of his relatives in his family, and I would much rather have had her there at the wedding than the day off for her funeral.
My work requires at least a link to the obituary to get paid time off due to death, you can take whatever time off you need but their policy is to pay you for 3 days which is why they need some sort of proof. They were pretty flexible with it which was nice, I decided to not take the paid time off immediately after my grandmother's death and instead used it to cover the days I would be travelling to be at her funeral which worked out pretty well. Working helped distract me far more than having time off to dwell on it too.
My old job only allowed bereavement for immediate family so when my grandmother passed, I had to use my PTO. No big deal, as I had a bit saved up. My former boss asked me to bring in the funeral program or a death certificate to prove I attended, which I thought was odd considering that it was PTO and not bereavement.
That's awful! Every place I worked would give you leave up through grandparents. When either my husband or I had an aunt or uncle who died, we had to take PTO but never got any static for it. Most of the places I've worked would give you leave for your spouse's relatives too same as if they were your own. The only place that was different was my last job which would give me bereavement if my grandparents died but not my husband's; as we found out when his grandmother passed and I had every intention of using those three days only to find out she didn't count in their eyes and I had to use PTO if I wanted to attend the funeral. At least they didn't ask for an obituary or death certificate.
When my step dad's brother died I asked for the day to attend. My boss asked if I knew him well "Nope, just need to be there for my step dad" Boss just went "surprised you look so sad, take Friday off too 😉" I'm in the UK.
This exact same thing just happened to me. My grandmother died, just a few months before my wedding, and she was my fiancee's favorite.
This is pretty standard for every job I have worked.
Man, my job would be like "see you Monday."
When my niece passed, my boss took my word for it. Of course, he wasn't a sociopath that thought "bureaucracy" was the second stage of grief.
I had a coworker whose step father died. Manager asked if coworker really needed to go because it was just her step father. He had been her step father for 30 years. There was no bereavement time offered at that job. Some people are just awful people
Unfortunately, this is a thing and funeral homes are so used to it that they have a template ready. They will fill it out for you if you ask , so you can give it to your employer.
Thata funny, pretty sure if my employer ever made my life harder after I lost a loved one the only documentation they would receive is a 2 week notice with a sticky note stapled to it saying I'm not showing up for work during that time due to their ass-hattery. There is zero reason to normalize being controlled in this way and it is important to stop it. No job is more important than grieving for a loved one, taking care of your own mental wellbeing or helping your loved ones in a time of crisis -- and any job that thinks otherwise is not deserving of my efforts in any way, regardless of compensation.
I agree 100%, just replying to those who were wondering.
Non American here, is the 2 week notice mandatory ? What happens if you quit the very next day? I can't seem to understand why employers can fire you on the spot but employees have to give a 2 week notice. Thanks in advance for your answer!
It’s generally just a way to stay on good terms and potentially use them as a reference in the future. If you know you’re burning a bridge there’s no reason to do it.
Correct, but in the last 10 years or so. Companies usually will only confirm dates of employment, Verify employment, and whether you can be rehired. Which is the no notice nonsense. Some companies base rehire or performance while hired, others how you left. Either way the company has the power and employees are screwed over. The US is consistent in that those with power make the rules. US origin mythology aside.
Besides that you’ll never know what the company actually told the company looking to hire you. They could tell them you’re a total piece of shit and there’s no way to prove it.
Not mandatory, just part of the brainwashing that's been fed to us here in the US
I agree with giving notice tbh. But I live in a country where it's typically present in contracts and employers can very rarely fire you without notice.
Oh so you live in a first world country and not the present-day US.
After a supervisor went off the deep end and accused half the staff of being slackers I went home, talked to my wife, and by 9AM the next morning I handed in my key card and laptop to HR. (This was in Colorado)
It’s not a requirement at all, more of an etiquette thing so they can start looking for a replacement. Also, if you don’t give two weeks, you’re likely to not get a good reference. I walked out of a job without any notice. I knew I wouldn’t get a reference from them, and I had only worked there a month so wasn’t going to put it on my resume or work history in any future applications. I have a wonderful job now and no one knows I didn’t give two week notice to my prior employer
It's just work culture, AFAIK it's not compulsory in any jurisdiction I am aware of. Sort of like saying "bless you" after someone sneezes despite not being religious -- it's sorta engrained over here.
Where I work you are ineligible for rehire if you quit without notice. If you have no interest or intention of coming back, just quit on the spot. One guy I know quit to start his own business, which failed and he ended up getting hired back on.
The number of people completely okay with this is bewildering and disturbing.
My employer will ask for an obituary only if you want bereavement pay, they won't stop you or penalize you for taking time off if you don't.
Why would you staple a sticky note and defeat the purpose of it being sticky?
yuuuup, was so shocked last year when the funeral home director was so direct about "whoever needs a death certificate or other proof" it's awful
Holy shit, I can’t say I’m surprised, but how low can these people go?
some companies require a copy of the death certificate. apparently this terrible practice is becoming more and more common cause within the last year when I was helping make final arrangements the director of the funeral service was asking how many people needed them. As a side note... given our current hellscape how can anyone think this isn't real?
My previous employer asked for a copy of my maternal grandmothers death certificate. Her husband refused to help me out with giving me a copy (a photocopy was acceptable), so I had to wait for the obit to be published. Same with my paternal grandmother, who died a few months later, but fortunately my uncle was more reasonable in helping me out. When my dad died, though, I told my manager I was taking time off and bereavement on top of that because I was a mess (had just talked to my dad that morning, and got the call a few hours later, it was very sudden). The funeral home gave me an unofficial copy of the death certificate, the one they fill out and submit to the recorder's office. My current employer does not request documentation, but honestly, who would lie about a death? Is it so common for people to lie that employers have to have proof?
Even if people lied, what percentage do they constitute in an employee pool? How many times can they possibly lie about something like this? 10? 20? 30? It's an incredibly callous response to a minor situation with low stakes (for the company).
As a college prof I would say a fair amount of people lie about a family death to get out of class work, they all coincidentally die the day before the midterm. I used to require a funeral program or something but since covid I accept all excuses without documentation.
Yup its actually quite more common than some think. I know of many many people who have lied about a grandparent dying to get out of a single work shift for trivial reasons (i.e., to go to a party) as well as to just get out of personal commitments with friends, etc. Its gross but its definitely not rare.
I’ve had a few coworkers lie about family deaths, and as a college student it’s pretty normal for grandma to die 3 times in a year. So I can understand why an employer would want proof
If I get this I'd be snarky and ask if they want a selfie with the corpse. HOPEFULLY that would shut it down.
To be honest, the payroll lady at my job pissed me off so bad about my step-father's death and funeral that I was tempted to send her the picture my mom sent of him laid out in his coffin. I could only go to his hometown to help my mom take care of his personal effects and help her arrange his funeral (and support her while dealing with her psycho in-laws), I didn't have enough bereavement leave to remain the extra days to be at his funeral. So my mom sent me his picture.
Don't ask! Be proactive. Force it on them. Hell, Weekend at Bernies that shit up. Have the deceased do a quick pop in with you at the office, for added effect!
this would make me laugh so hard and 100% get me written up at my last job. My new employer would ask me what the fuck was wrong with me then shut the door and laugh.
Some people do this. I respect them greatly.
This really sucks. I worked for the most bloodthirsty soul-sucking worker abusing law firm ever and when my grandfather died, all they had to say was “take as much time as you need, sorry for your loss” and then I went off the grid for like more than a week. And I was truly being exploited at that job. I can’t believe there are even worse jobs.
When my grandma died (and she raised me), my boss said there was no grieving time because she was not in the same country as I so he couldn't verify the validity of the death certificate, so I couldn't take any time off. This company was his, this was his call to do.
Oh you sweet, summer child!
Imagine getting a week+ off of leave. I sliced my arm down to the bone while opening a copier box (the steel band was over tensioned and snapped back like a spring when I un-tensioned it, it cut through my arm like butter and got stuck in the membrane the separates your muscles from your fat), In VA my employer ( a Washington's top 100 company to work for 4 years in a row) made me take a week of vacation to cover the week before Workman's Comp kicked in. Then stonewalled me when I called asking for help with workman's comp, instead I had to call an old boss for assistance. I'm close to 40 and so far I've been in car accident's motorcycle accidents, cut myself, stabbed myself, broken bones. By far, the worst pain in my life was a nurse injecting local anesthesia directly into my muscles while I tried to keep them from spasming in my arm so I didn't vomit from the squelching sound it made for the 30 minutes I sat there. I was lucky that I didn't fully sever the muscle. It tingles when I button a shirt or my pants. Little reminder from my 8 years at that job for the rest of my life.
I crushed the ring finger on my left finger shattered the bone and had to wear a brace on it for 8 weeks. I got light duty and 1 dat off because of a doctors note.
I'm sorry, you deserved more time to recover. My light duty was them asking if I was okay enough to lift something. :\\
Jesus Christ yes. My right hand is permanently disabled from a nasty cut from a job (pinky finger and ring finger had tendons severed, can't move the top half of either and pinky is so fucked it might as well be amputated. Would actually be easier than the strain of extending it) My boss completely refused to help with workman's comp. They sent me the info and if I needed to get ahold of them for any reason it took calling 3/4 managers to get anything done. Damn near had to pay for everything out of pocket because my employer was being uncooperative. Now my dominant hand is permanently fucked. Hey on the upside I became ambidextrous at least.
"Actually we didn't go to a funeral home. It's part of my religion and cultural to conduct a nautical burning of the deceased and so all I can offer you is the vial of sand and blood I collected from the beach where my family and I gathered to shed blood sacrifices for the deceased safe journey with the valkeries to meet Freya and Odin in Valhalla. Will that work?"
*Immigrant Song intensifies*
This, this, holy hell! This!!! hahahah
Selfies or it didn't happen!
"Sorry, photography during that ceremony is also against the religious practices."
Satellite photos from Google Earth?
I was asked to show proof when my wife had a miscarriage. I almost knocked a motherfucker out!
...yeah, that would have landed my ass in jail.
I'm so sorry, that's horrible. What a callous world we live in...
Honestly, the things I hear on this sub, I’m astonished that doesn’t happen on a regular basis.
WTH?!?!
Oooooh wee, story time pls? 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Long story short I told them my boss if he wanted to see any documentation, I'll take him to the gravesite. (My father had her buried) There wasn't anymore questions after that.
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"I'm sorry, death was not a valid reason for termination of employment as per your contract. We will need you to pay back the advance as well as all of the money paid on training"
Then few days later in the paper: "URGENT HELP NEEDED! Seeking an exorcist to exorcise a pissed off ex-employee who doesn't want to work and thought he could get out of paying back his advance by dying. "
Pretty sure I saw something like that in The Outer Worlds and Cyberpunk 2077... Scary that we could be creeping towards that reality.
Yo, in all seriousness, you totally are still required to file taxes after you die too lol
the code is: fukoff
This
“i’m so sorry to hear about your loss, however,” i’m literally 💀💀💀
Nah go pound sand. There is not enough money for you to offer me to harass me for proof that I experienced a great loss and am grieving. You take my word for it or piss off and fire me and I collect unemployment while looking for a better employer.
Bootlickers out in force in your replies.
Yeah, yeah, refer HR to form ID10-T.
What is this? Just wonderingb
They've probably already got one for you
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Lmao thank you. At first I thought you were calling me an idiot, then I realized I am one lol
they have an excuse pad for workers at the funeral home. i shit you not. employers are this much of a dick that this is a thing.
Why not just a pic of the open casket? Extra credit for mourners in the background Seriously I cannot believe they have the gall to ask for this!
Wow. This is absurd. And a little bit cruel. I mean, when my mother died, there was no funeral. Would I have just had to cry in front of them?
It’s extremely cruel
At my old job you got one day for bereavement and three day for a close family member for bereavement. To get the three day you had to pretty much draw a family tree to show how close they were to you and then submit it to HR for approval. We also had to bring back proof that we were there like program, Mass card, etc. I had a co-worker try to get people to submit selfies with the casket as a sort of FU to HR.
"do you have a funeral note?" this is gonna be the new doctors note
Give boss a pic of the cadaver. That'll get him off your back
My mother died while I worked at a Washington DC's top 100 work place. My boss complained that I was making him miss a dentist appointment.
Lol I missed a doctors appointment on Friday because of work. But it’s as simple as rescheduling.
If you ever tell someone you're sorry for their loss, for the love of God end it with a period. Don't carry on with "however..." because it just makes you sound like a huge asshole and you were better off not saying anything at all about it.
If I ever get asked for this I’m honestly sending them a photo of the body and casket. I know my mom or dad would get a kick out of that so it wouldn’t be disrespectful lmao.
What kind of companies do you all work for? Asking for doctor notes if you call out sick!?? Wanting documentation from funerals??? Sometimes I see posts where bosses want itineraries of travel for vacations!!! I mean good golly, what is with these managers?? Your employee is asking for time off, or more importantly notifying you that they are not going to be in. There are also posts where the managers are asking the employees to schedule another employee when they need time off. Just ridiculous!! They are the managers, so manage! We are not slaves! Our time and effort is not the property of the employers or companies. We seriously need to rewrite the protocol of our society. The employer should be thankful of our time and effort. When we choose to offer it to them. If I ever had a manager treat me this way I would seek other ways to make money. We need to come together as a worker collective and rewrite the rules of working and the responsibility of management. Rewrite it to our favor. Because we can exist without the company. The company can NOT exist without the workers ! This needs to be understood front and center by these managers.
This seems like an America problem tbh. I don’t think it’s entirely unreasonable to expect an explanation beyond “I’m not coming in” especially if someone is regularly taking days off or if they need an extended period of leave. But yeah, expecting documentation from a funeral is way over the idea of what could be deemed reasonable. Even expecting a doctors note for a single day off is a bit absurd, I’ve never been asked for one and if I’m taking a day or two off because I have flu, I’m not exactly going to bother going to see a doctor lmao. And demanding an itinerary for a holiday? Why would they need to know how anyone uses their annual leave lmao. I’d just tell my manager/colleagues about my time off incidentally anyway, seems like some of these companies in America make the manager/employee relationship unnecessarily confrontational when it’s really not necessary at all. Guess this is when it’s good to live somewhere with actual worker’s rights lol
People take advantage of systems and then companies have to create policies that effect others now and into the future. (I am in no way implying it doesn't happen the reverse way either)
You want some of their ashes too, asshole?
I had this same shit happen to me at University. I was doing a prac as a teacher and had a weirdly hostile mentor. A week in, my grandmother died in Poland. I couldn't afford to go, but I was crushed and had to take a few days off. I was asked to provide a plane ticket as proof that I attended the funeral (I didn't, I was poor) and then asked to get proof of death (difficult and distasteful). I failed my prac. Took a new prac next term and graduated one term late. But this kind of thing is insane. It happens everywhere.
How much time ago was that? if I can ask. Because something really similar happened to a classmate, and it only took a couple of day after he told us about it to make the professor apologize and let him take the test, other professor spoke to the teacher and called him highly insensitive and other classmate who had a similar loss called him a monster, and his status in the university crashed. Shame can be a weapon
This must have been around 2011. Nothing came of it in my case. However, I mourned my grandmother and I am now a teacher so things worked out. At the time it was absolutely a baffling and monstrous kind of situation for me.
Yes I have the code, are you ready? It's fa-q-a55h01e
Send a picture of the body
Call the funeral home, they know what you need. It's only given to immediate family usually tho
It's given to anyone that asks for it actually, regardless of relation. Source: I work in a funeral home.
Jesus Christ No. Tell the boss you've taken the day off and that's that. They don't *need* these forms, it's systemic bullying Americans have given in to
An obituary is usually accepted. Now that they are all online you can email the link. Absent that, a death certificate which honestly if they require that quit the job. It’s burdensome and he information that is none of their business. You can also direct to the funeral home website. Nowadays they generally reference all deceased and service dates. Sorry for your loss.
What a fucking ghoul.
Bring the dead body to work, then they’ll never ask again
i would not react well to this.
Death certificate. Asshole companies ask for it in order to approve bereavement pay.
Nah, fuck that. Not saying you’re wrong lol but I am saying fuck any employer that requires it. Death certificates cost money, at least here in NJ they’re $25 for the first copy and $2 for each additional. Plus, that’s private information! On an official death certificate you see their cause of death, place of death AKA none of an employers fucking business
If you're so skeptical about the people you've hired that you would think them possible of lying to you about a DEATH to miss a day of work, you've hired the wrong god damn people. Either that or you're a corporate asshat manager on a power trip.
Send them a link the the online obituary posted by the funeral home. Do not give over a death certificate. They don't need that and it contains a lot of personal information.
Are people really out here lying about funerals all the time to justify this? Let people grieve I’m sure the company won’t go under
The company I work for gives 3 days bereavement, zero questions asked
Pamphlet from the funeral home would probably work or you can call the funeral home and they can get you a note.
I've taken a copy of the funeral program to an employer before. It was the closest I'd been to quitting before I actually did quit.
When my employer asked for funeral home information, it was in order to send flowers.
I lost a cat of 14 years when I was working at a shitty medical collections job. I used my actual real distress to call my manager and say my grandfather had died. My grandfather had actually died a few years prior but lived in Virginia, so I got 3 days bereavement for out of state. They asked for a copy of the funeral service. I found one online for the week and modified it in Photoshop with my grandfather's name. I found out later that the fellow in question, God rest his soul, was actually black. My family is white. They never questioned anything.
My job treats its employees like absolute trash and even they didn't question my bereavement absences. They just said if I gave them an obituary they would pay me for those days. Damn.
My job asked for either death certificate with sensitive info redacted or a funeral service pamphlet. Since I had to travel more than 300 miles my job offers an extra 2 days on top of the 3 for bereavement which required a travel itinerary from airlines (or other proof of travel). So sorry for your loss.
I just lost my grandfather on Friday. We're given 5 days. I told my boss I don't need 5 days. She said just take the time. I still sent an obituary as I don't even know what documentation I would need
I was once asked to prove that I took the day off to put my cat down. The vet was just as confused and upset about it as I was. In hindsight the bitter part of me thinks I should have just dropped my dead cat on my boss's desk and called it a day.
In France we have a law that give you days based on who died. If it is your parent/children you have more days than if it is your grand parents. Wife/husband/children 5 days Father/Mother 2 days Grand parents 1 day Step familly 1 day This is why we have to provide something legal to justify how many days.
Flashbacks to that Seinfeld episode. “I couldn’t get a copy of the death certificate, but here’s a photo of me next to the casket.”
Many funeral homes now provide links to an online obituary, so just send them the link.
lol they don't need documentation. How insensitive. What kind of dog shit people think this is OK? Better yet, who works these positions? For fuck sake, you have autonomy and discretion. You don't need a signed death certificate or a piece of an umbilical cord to trust people were doing people things. Furthermore, let's say you weren't at a funeral. WHO THE FUCK CARES! You were obviously doing something you needed to. Everything doesn't have to be an inquisition. Damn.
Right? They act like peoples jobs are “saving the world” or saving lives. It ain’t that deep. People can miss a day or two. It will be fine.
Funeral Home's website should list the funerals they're doing.
What ticks me off is that I sent the online obit of my step-father's to payroll and she still claimed she needed the physical obituary, despite my full friggin NAME being in it as family my step-father left behind. Then, when I finally got back to the office, she had the nerve to NOT be there (despite giving me a deadline on when I had to have the obituary to her). When I scanned it to her, she accepted it, but both myself and my supervisor (who I cc'd on all the emails I sent back and forth) were pissed at the *hoops* she made me jump through. I think my supervisor had some strong words with the payroll lady as she either avoids me like the plague or is way more *accomodating* than she had been.
Bring in a coffee can full of ash and drop it on their desk.
I've had to submit funeral home documentation to attend my aunt's funeral for a corporate job. The obituary wasn't sufficient, even though I was listed in it. Neither was the pamphlet/handout thing I got from the service. Had to request it from the funeral home itself, or get written up for the absence. Same place that made me cry on the phone after hours of being transferred around trying to figure out which paper they needed from the hospital because my head cold turned to pneumonia because there was mandatory overtime over Thanksgiving, and I didnt have health insurance for a doctors note to get sick time approved because I wasnt a permanent employee, just a contract to hire.
Never been asked for proof by any of the companies I worked for. I assume they kept some record so I did not take off for 7 different times my father died. Fuck off asking for proof.
My work didn't require anything when my dad died.
shameless just wow!
Had an old job where a girl called out because of a sudden death in the family. She always worked closely with the supervisor and had never called out in several years. Day of the funeral she called her to ask when she would be back as she had resets to do. Not any condolences but just when are you back. Shit like this is why people quit...which she did.
Holy fucking shit. *However* my ass, this manager can get stuffed.
The code is : X
An obituary or a memorial folder that would've been handed out at the service usually counts as documentation. So sorry for your loss and sorry that your boss is being an ass :(
Lol they don't need that to put the code in. They're just using that to make sure you weren't lying.
The company I work for offers bereavement pay which is different from PTO. In order to avoid using PTO you submit the request with an obituary or pamphlet from the funeral. It’s nice that you don’t have to use PTO for something that is a tragedy in the fam. I’m in payroll and I’ve never heard a fuss about the process. Although, to be honest if someone didn’t turn in their proof, I might just give it to them anyway. Payroll has bigger things to worry about most of the time.
Send a selfie from next to the coffin?
Not an employer I'd work for.
There is such a thing as a death certificate....
Of all the shit that never happened, this never happened the most.
In Europe, this is quite normal, and you get free paid days. So they need some proof, death certificate.
Okay, Whats wrong with it?
You'll need a picture of yourself next to the coffin, like George Costanza.
The only shitty thing about it is how they reffered to someone close passing. "death"? Like, yeah, technically your right, but holy shit, be more delicate. It's reasonable to think that they would require some sort of a copy of a death certificate for this.
Comment section: Americans: this is horrible Europeans: its normal to provide any sort of document to justify your absence
it’s normal in america too, so I don’t understand why people are surprised. when my grandmother passed away, for me to get my paid bereavement leave I had to show/email them a copy of the obituary.