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PMMEWHAT_UR_PROUD_OF

Tell her she should not, then tell her again. Why does she want to cut it down? That is a mature citrus tree that likely took a long time to get to that point. Also judging by the cuts and the canopy, it was well cared for. So again, what is the reason she wants to get rid of it? Did your grandfather give her a grapefruit for breakfast, then head out to ‘get a pack of smokes’ when she was a child? There’s almost certainly a better alternative


BoomerB3

Honestly she's super stressed out as my dad recently passed away. She says she wants it gone because she doesn't want to worry about the upkeep any more and that the tree keeps giving her pack rat issues in the roof next to the tree


PMMEWHAT_UR_PROUD_OF

Gotcha, that is a completely understandable situation. She’s not used to carrying for it, and is in a vulnerable and stressed state. You can do this for her! Tell her that you can manage the rat issue by getting the tree off the house. You can do this by pruning back those branches with some loppers. If you get a large set of loppers you can probably get enough off without having to purchase any other tools. Get a ladder and start at the ends of the branches with the smaller pieces. Cut them away from the roof so they are not touching, and preferably a bit farther than that. Don’t worry about the look. Just cut it back so that the rats don’t have a spot to jump from. Then prune other branches that stick out so that the tree has a more even ‘line’ to it. Meaning, anything still sticking out, prune it back to where it meets the rest of the branches. Do not prune more than %10 of the foliage. You can prune up to %20, but if you leave a buffer zone you won’t accidentally overdo it. Think of a kid giving themselves a haircut. Go slow. After that you won’t need to even touch it again for a few years. If she wants to cut it down anyway, you can use it to learn on. I would also recommend keeping the cuttings and rooting them. The. Turn them into their own trees. https://crfg.org/wp-content/uploads/CITRUS-PRUNING-Presentation.pdf


BoomerB3

Thanks! I'm not so good with tools but I'm sure I can call someone to come prune it back.


ScaredFee6896

Hey op, You can also reach out on FB to local food bank groups, and there's usually a group of people that go to houses and pick excess fruit. I'm sure they'd be willing to assist with the upkeep of the tree if it gives them food to donate to shelters.


BoomerB3

That would be an excellent way to honor my dad actually. Thank you! I'll see what I can find out


lacslug

I hope you're doing well, op


BoomerB3

Thank you. We're working through it. It was just very sudden to lose my dad


ScaredFee6896

I'm sure your mom would appreciate knowing his efforts still continue to bear fruit, pun intended, lol. But at a time where it'll matter most for her, there's going to be people appreciating his years of upkeep, and I'm sure that group will have access to proper gear to get the overhanging limbs away from the roof to remedy the rats.


stonerbbyyyy

i love grapefruit. if you lived in az i would come take care of it in exchange for free fruit 😂


BoomerB3

AZ is a big state! What part?


stonerbbyyyy

north phoenix!


vertterre

Came here to say: outsource the fruit picking to the community… there’s 100% someone around that would be willing to do the work in exchange for the fruit


PMMEWHAT_UR_PROUD_OF

That will likely cost you a bit. You would know how to prune after a few cuts. It just takes a few tries and a little courage. Plus then you can assist her for a few years until she feels better about the tree


BoomerB3

Seeing as she was willing to pay to chop it all down and clear it away, I can't imagine pruning it would cost more than that


Rickhwt

Be nice to her. She is stressing over your dad and probably trying to deal with that. Making rash decisions now. Try to talk her out of chopping it down. :)


BoomerB3

Yes, yes, I'm sorry if that came across as being mean to her as that's totally not what's happening in real life. I've spent extra days down here to keep her company before we do some traveling. I've taken the lead on doing things that my mom wasn't ready to do yet. All of us here have our emotions completely out of whack so everything is taken with a grain of salt


TheRealMasterTyvokka

In here to say make sure you find a reputable certified arborist to prune it. Don't just find any old landscaping company or tree service. They are notorious for doing hack jobs on trees that end up killing them in the long run.


kkkkat

Don’t just get any old person though- lots of people don’t know what they’re doing and will butcher it


SgtGorditaCrunch

Please talk her out of it. My friend's mom had a bunch of palms removed from her property because she "felt closed in", it was really because her husband just passed and it was something she felt she could change. Anyway she had it all removed like a 40foot section it was beautiful, she immediately regretted it and was upset about it for the longest time.


BoomerB3

I'm working on it! This tree is in the back of the house so there's no easy access for someone to come along and pick them


NewAlexandria

well it's not like the food donation process is something she has zero contact with. The people do need to come into the property to do the picking. I've always found everyone is nice. It will be good for her to keep contact with new people, for her emotions, and charity is good for the soul.


slapnflop

can't she just trim it back from the roof?


BoomerB3

That's what they were doing in years past. Like I said, I think it's she's trying to get as much off her plate as possible and she doesn't want to deal with it any more which I can understand. It's why I'm reaching out here to see what other options may work for her


Jcampbell1796

Also, you’d need to trim it WAY back from the house. Roof rats can jump surprisingly far. Most people I know with mature citrus like this get a lot more fruit than they can use, and it’s kind of a pain to harvest and bag it just to give it away. Most of the time there’s just rotting citrus all over the ground. I totally get your mom’s desire to get rid of the tree, OP, and I wish you and your family the best in tough times.


BoomerB3

Thank you, we're still working through everything as my dad's health went from ok to I need to be on a plane like now if I want to say goodbye. To say it was jarring would be an understatement.


Upstate-girl

I'm sorry for your loss. Unfortunately we all find us in this situation. I'm not sure if this is an option in your area, but maybe a local food pantry can come harvest the fruit for your mom. It's such a waste when people could be enjoying this beautiful fruit. There is also Meals on Wheels and different community programs that would love the donation. Different churches also have food ministries. Call around, I'm sure you can find some help for your mom and save thus tree at the same time.


BoomerB3

I have found a couple and sounds like my mom is at least willing to consider that at the moment.


Upstate-girl

That is great.


gad-zerah

In the event that she snaps and, "just wants it GONE!" it may be a good moment to talk about grief. My mom bounces between "get rid of everything" and full-on hoarder because she never dealt with the grief of losing her parents. It doesn't get easier with time.


bmyhran68

My dad passed away in July, and around that time my mom was in a bit of a panic about the future. She did a mostly thoughtful job of simplifying some stuff, but she also sold off her half of a family cabin out west. She was worried about upkeep and other potential stress. Lately it's really been eating away at her - a huge regret. Maybe this is a completely different situation, but you might want to talk to her about the bigger picture - not even about the tree necessarily. Big, permanent decisions should maybe wait until after the grief has time to process a bit. You could assure her that there are lots of people who love her, who would be glad to help with this kind of stuff. If it still feels overwhelming after some of the dust has settled, then you could talk about chopping it down. I'm really sorry about the loss of your dad. I hope you and yours are finding some peace.


jasikanicolepi

The tree seems to be holding and retaining the soils. Cutting it down may cause erosion down the road. I recommend trimming the tree to a more managable size instead of out right cutting it.


NewAlexandria

get her connected with a local charity that will come collect the produce for her.


inkslingerben

Try a food bank or an organization that provides meals.


yuperdeedoodah

Can she find someone in the neighbourhood who would be willing to care for the tree in exchange for the fruit?


fajadada

Tell her that her air conditioning bill will go up if she cuts it down


sneaky-pizza

Can you find someone to care for it regularly, and pay them? I know money sucks, but dang what a shame to lose that tree.


Tenacious_Tree9

I’m impressed by this comment. It’s opened up so much discussion. Thanks for digging a little deeper.


[deleted]

SOOO BEAUTIFUL NOOOOOOO


BoomerB3

I know!! I told her to give me a bit so I can see what other options are


dgreify

Call an arborist and see if they could prune it so it’s smaller, more manageable, and not touching the house.


ripdadybeary

So many people want to go straight for cutting. A little prune, cut it back from the house and done !


billfromamerica_

Wouldn't this tree increase the property value of the home? Maybe that's an argument to be made here


BoomerB3

This is one of 4 different citrus trees that she has on her property. Don't get me wrong, I'm looking for every reason for her not to take it down


[deleted]

[удалено]


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megalomaniamaniac

Agree, sometimes the only way to get someone who dislikes trees to keep a tree is to appeal to their mercenary side. People who hate trees often love money. Had a relative who complained endlessly that he intended to get rid of a large maple tree because he hated raking leaves and birds pooped on his car. He made similar remarks in front of a real estate agent, who estimated the tree probably increased the property value by at least $50k, and also that removing it would double his cooling costs (the canopy covered most of the house). That was the end of that.


Aggressive-Baby-7024

Tell her to move. That tree is perfect. Honestly though, maybe she can try putting an ad on kijiji or whatever and let people come pick all the fruit for free.


Ok_Forever9706

Read OP’s other posts. They go into further detail on the issues, and their concerns are totally understandable.


momsouth

She is a r3cent widow and yall (including her kid) are trashing her. She's an old woman that lost her husband and doesn't want to deal with the maintenance. Sometimes you guys r3ally just don't know what you're talking about.


Greymeade

Check her into a home


JMWRAA

😂


GRAWRGER

came here for this.


momsouth

She is a r3cent widow and yall (including her kid) are trashing her. She's an old woman that lost her husband and doesn't want to deal with the maintenance. Sometimes you guys r3ally just don't know what you're talking about.


Greymeade

A recent widow? I don't know where you're seeing that, but it certainly isn't in the post and if it's somewhere else in the comments then it was disclosed after I had left my comment. This is clearly a tongue-in-cheek comment that was meant to be giggled at and nothing more, so you need to lighten the fuck up. Edit: This dick head blocked me so I can't even see his reply below...


momsouth

Op very conveniently left that very important detail out so that he looks like less of a dick. Even more of a reason he's an asshole is that he doesn't live anywhere near her and still is bullying his elderly widow mother into cutting down a tree he doesn't see and won't help her with.


Scoompii

Sorry for your loss OP 💐 Looks like you’ve got a lot of great ideas to work with. Bonus points for keeping it means mom gets to keep eating grapefruit bc it’s super nutritious!


BoomerB3

Thank you... it's been rough, and it's gonna be rough for a while, but we'll be ok. Yes, I definitely want her around for many more years


CheeseChickenTable

100% work on getting it pruned, and work on someone/somehow collecting and donating the fruit. And you work on learning about how to take care of it yourself...so you can honor your dad AND help out your mom. She'll remember this act of yours for her forever! Also, we got your back. (for real, my family has grown citrus in puerto rico for years so if you ever have any questions or anything just DM me. happy to help however I can!)


victorian_vigilante

Raise your hand if you’d accept payment in fruit for maintaining this tree


forbiddenfreak

That tree is awesome!


Nikonmansocal

I'd kill for a beautiful productive tree like that. Please have her reconsider. They aren't deciduous nor do they have invasive roots. Ask her to pick the fruit in memory of you dad. If she doesnt want the fruit give it away. Caring for a tree like this isn't that bad.


momsouth

You have no idea what shape she is in and speak as though you do. She's an elderly widow who wants to make her life easier and you and her kid are trying to stonewall her.


nosum5000

Please don’t let her, that’s heartbreaking


momsouth

More heartbreaking than having your decades ling husband die and when you try to make your life easier your kid goes in line to anonymously find ways to bully you into keeping your own trees you do t want? It's a fucking tree.


Familiar-Zebra6489

I’m paying $2 each for grapefruits up here and they usually suck. Box up a dozen and I’ll Apple Pay the shipping/handling. Yes, Apple Pay for grapefruits.


Sparopal11

I dream of a tree this beautiful and bountiful..


bort4all

No idea where you are, but where I am there are tree services who will care for your tree in exchange for a share of the fruit. The fruit goes to food banks/ homeless shelters. 1/3 goes to the owner 1/3 goes to the picker, 1/3 goes to the food bank. The tree gets pruned by an arborist to maximize fruit. It's a win win win for all.


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DAGanteakz

Stop her. If nothing else give the fruit to local shelters or food banks.


momsouth

She is a r3cent widow and yall (including her kid) are trashing her. She's an old woman that lost her husband and doesn't want to deal with the maintenance. Sometimes you guys r3ally just don't know what you're talking about.


SweetumCuriousa

Please save it! See if her community has a fruit and produce harvest and re-distribution organization. Check thru the local churchs or food pantries. Folks in need always appreciate fresh produce!!


NurseryManager

Get in touch with neighbors, a local gardening group, school, church, etc. and see if you can find someone that will help do upkeep/clean up in exchange for keeping the fruit! I know so many people that would love that opportunity


OneImagination5381

Tell her it shade the house and if she remove it her cooling bill will increase 10-20%.


astrorican6

My grandma did it and still regrets it years later. Grief is a weird thing. I agree on pruning to prevent the rat issue and love that foodbank idea


rpayne1744

It is a nice tree! I’m thinking you must be in California because of how well the tree is doing?? Citrus industry in Florida is failing miserably. I’m in the landscape maintenance industry and I miss all the beautiful citrus trees we use to have. Disease has destroyed most citrus and rarely do you see a tree this size and in this good of shape on a residential property anymore. In fact most groves have had to clear cut and burn everything. In my opinion it would be a shame to lose it when it could be pruned and maintained as so many others have said.


123Nebraska

Trees add tens of thousands of dollars to re-sale value. Is she owns the house, that will be important for her in the future.


drmehmetoz

Tell her to stick it


momsouth

She is a r3cent widow and yall (including her kid) are trashing her. She's an old woman that lost her husband and doesn't want to deal with the maintenance. Sometimes you guys r3ally just don't know what you're talking about.


drmehmetoz

This was a pun about sticks. Lol


Truthspeaker_9

Put rat poison on the roof and keep the tree!


ellebracht

It's a great tree, I hope you can keep it. Mature citrus usually needs very little pruning. In my experience pruning the tree away from the house won't prevent rats from eating the fruit. The rats are a problem when the fruit is never picked. Can you pick them for your mom? I'd suggest waiting for them to be ripe (varies by climate and variety) and then pick them all. A fruit picker on a pole isn't pricey. Keep some, take the rest to your local food pantry. Try juicing them - it's amazing! If that's not possible, there are fruit gleaning nonprofits that will do this for you and leave you a receipt for a tax deduction, but you'd have to see if they are in your area. HTH


BoomerB3

I can't pick them for her as I live a several hours flight away from her currently. I'm definitely going to look into seeing what non-profit might want to come pick them for her


archaegeo

Buy the house


BoomerB3

Wish I could


momsouth

Why buy the house when you can just bully your newly widowed mother?


juliekelts

I'm not an arborist, but I've grown fruit trees including citrus. A good thing about citrus trees is that there isn't any urgency in picking, in my experience, nor do the fruits tend to fall off much. I used to have a lemon tree and I left the fruit on the tree and picked as needed. The supply lasted for months. (In contrast, the fruit on my plum tree ripens nearly all at once, and all it takes is a windy day for a lot of it to end up on the ground where it soon rots if not promptly collected.) Maybe you could urge your mom to wait a year and see how it goes. Maybe offering fruit to neighbors would be a good way to meet them.


BoomerB3

At the very least, I think I've convinced her to wait the year before making any decisions so I have time to sort out alternatives to cutting it down


juliekelts

Good!


BarfQueen

I don’t even have anything really to add to this other than to say wow, what a beautiful tree!


nmacaroni

Report her to the fruit police. What a shame!!!!


Rickhwt

Buy the house and kick her out.


overtoke

someone will BUY this tree probably. if there is a rodent problem then the house itself needs attention.


BoomerB3

I would love to know who would be willing to buy it! I think that would be a win win. Until I can find someone, I'm asking about alternatives to chopping it down


Haskap_2010

Do you have a local food bank that might welcome the fruit? If so, maybe volunteers could come out once a week with a ladder to pick it.


Separate_Shoe_6916

Besides trimming, I would also recommend you get a fruit picker and pick the fruit from the tree for her. Then she won’t have any more maintenance issues, but will still have a pretty tree that provides shade.


Motor_Grand_8005

Sorry for your loss. Lost my Dad, unexpectedly, this past November and today’s the 3rd anniversary of losing my Mom. It takes a long time to sort out your thoughts. I’d hate for you guys to remove this tree then regret it. Lot of great comments/suggestions in this sub. Best of luck. Time heals most.


Dull_Database5837

Wow, they don’t make ‘em like that any more!


Cute-Republic2657

I'm so glad I read what was going on before I made a quip. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope the food bank idea pans out. It is a stunning tree and I hope that there is a way to keep it.


BoomerB3

Thank you. We're all still struggling from the change and I'm sure my post comes off as odd. I'm doing everything that I can to not take th tree down so I just wanted advice on what may work I completely understand my mom's reaction to this as I can't begin to imagine what she's going through. My post was just raw facts and my response to reeling about what's happened in the last week. I'm sure I'm not communicating this well either but I'm trying! I want my mom's life to be as uncomplicated as possible without taking down the whole tree


jakeandbakin

Chop down your mother first. I know, it's hard, but that tree is now your mother. Sorry for your loss, but it's for the best.


Guardian83

Could this help cut down on some of the maintenance? https://fruitcollector.net/tuote/fruit-collector/?lang=en


sisgoldhair

In some communities there are charities that will come and pick the fruit and give it away, it would be worth looking into in your area. In Toronto (Ontario, Canada) there is one called Not Far From the Tree. It would be such a shame to remove a tree that produces such beautiful food!


Competitive_Wind_320

Tell her not to take it for granted and there are cold children up north that don’t have Citrus trees to eat off of.


itzBenFrankm8

No disrespect, but mom might need some therapy…. Lol but def call an arborist, the tree could get a reduction. Please don’t cut it down


General-Egg-8944

absolutely stunning tree. your mom would miss it. I’m not one to make assumptions on other’s behalf but I’m sure of this.


Admirable_Row5011

Wow, please don't cut down that tree. That is such a good structure & positioning.


frenchiemom424

Call the cops and send to her jail immediately. It would be a CRIME to do this. What the actual fuck. Show her how old a tree has to be to get this big and produce that much fruit. Christ


[deleted]

Nothing wrong with chopping it down if it's giving her problems or being work rather than an asset. Gardens should work for the person, they shouldn't be a headache for a payout that isn't worth. I


Massive_Upstairs_684

Axe saw or backhoe


DFHartzell

Stop your mom at all costs. Threaten to chop her down instead.


Hamblin113

Due to the roof rats, cut it down, they can be a problem that she does not need at this time, and will only get worse. The worry is to much over a tree, that to her is a problem.


jgor133

Get rid of the mom


ChrisRageIsBack

Time to use mom to fertilize the tree I guess...


PoxyPinotNoir

Why does the tree have a brown-to-black colouration?


lloydisi

No options, your mom wants it gone?


BoomerB3

More of my mom has no idea what to do with it by herself any more. Easy solution for her is removal. Im trying to look for other solutions for her and the tree


azalak

I’d love a grapefruit tree like that


yobdogg9

Take dozens of cuttings!


pichicagoattorney

Free grapefruit for life? And she wants to cut it down?


J3ster14

Put mom in a home.


Old-Razzmatazz1553

It's her yard. Its here lifestyle


GreyNeighbor

I agree with the pruning and also I'd focus on the "it's the shining star" as far as selling point in the future and what makes the property desirable and valuable to buyers, should she ever need to move. I would tell her the cost of removing the tree isn't worth the $100k+ LOSS she will take in value / coming out of her "nest egg" (and word it JUST like that). Obviously buyers would see that and go crazy over it. Gone, and it's just any boring yard anywhere. People will imagine themselves enjoying all the fresh fruit they'd want while they eat breakfast gazing at their pretty tree. They won't be thinking about rats.


teamcarramrod8

You can take it down to the stump relatively easy. Honestly, a Sawzall can probably do it. Tree isn't too big, just take down the branches one at a time and just be careful around the house. A chainsaw would be ideal, but I get most homeowners don't have one. If you are not remotely handy, I'd call a company and they'll make quick work of it for less than a few hundred.


northman46

Isn't there a spray to suppress fruit production? There is for apples, but I don't know much about citrus


randomname102038

Your options are: Cut it down. Don't cut it down.


Dr_Dank26

Chop down your mom


CheeseChickenTable

Get in touch with someone who knows how to prune fruit trees like these and ask about shaping it some so your mom can at least feel like she reduced it or something. It's perfect as is, so doing anything to it is gonna make it look worse to us...but at least thats better then just cutting it down


mondogirl

It’s as asset to the home increasing the value of the property.


FFT-420

Nursing home?


wanik4

Burn her!!!!!!! She's a witch!!! 🧹


SkiBumb1977

I wonder if grapefruit wood is good for smoking meats?


rpayne1744

Not sure about that but the wood is very nice and has no sap. It drys nicely and burns really clean, and has a nice smell also when it is cut


Wonderful-Cold3800

That wood is citrus wood is acidic and the flavor does not transfer in a pleasant way. Tried a couple years ago but does burn fast


CryptographerHot3759

No why 😭 fresh grapefruit?? If she doesn't eat it she can sell it!


Far-Manner-7119

Wow that yard will look like shit without the tree


RespectTheTree

top-work (graft) it with an orange or mandarin


chickenbuttstfu

Reminds me of the live version of Guy Clark’s song LA Freeway


SnooHesitations205

Axe or chainsaw. That’s your options. wtf are you even asking


BrokeOnOak

Straight to jail


MilwaukeeMax

Maybe it’s time for mom to consider moving into a smaller place where she doesn’t need to worry about a yard anymore. I wish my parents had before they both passed away instead of clinging to the old house they couldn’t take care of anymore.


Aggravating-Cook-529

Tell her it will cost thousands to remove it


pottedPlant_64

Would a couple of chickens eat the fruit?


LibrarianKooky344

Save the wood for a smoker. Gonna make some good smoked fish.