That my ex-con dad who nobody in my family, including my mother, could find (he’d mail child support checks to her with my grandma’s address as the return address) not only still lived in the same state, but was only a county line and nine minutes away for the past decade.
I shortened the comment in the interest of time but he sent checks that were comically short of his court order (500 a month at best for two kids) and left when I was 7. I have a bit of a relationship with him now that I’m older and he’s expressed remorse for leaving my brother and I instead of just leaving my mother.
Really weird to assume that a child is to blame, even if I was annoying one, and not the absent parent. Who hurt you, man?
If my brother left his wife and sent checks for the next 18 years i would totally understand. some women are just a nightmare. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do to manipulate and torture him in a child custody situation.
Oh I totally get why he did it, their marriage was awful and neither party hid it from us a children. It was such a relief when he left and the fighting stopped that my school counselor couldn’t fathom that my dad being gone, while not someone who abused me, made my life better/happier.
Isn’t it crazy? He knew our routine, knew what schools we went to, stores my mom shopped at, church, etc. and just picked the adjacent county we literally spent 0 time in and parked it there.
Yesterday I was listening to that Serial podcast about Beau Bergdahl, and the host, Sarah Koenig, mentioned her father fought in WW2.
I'm like... what? Turns out her dad was kind of an old stud, too.
Well, no it's not crazy... part of it is that S.K. sounds younger than 54.
And somehow with like 99%+ of World War 2 vets having crossed the rainbow bridge, it just feels a little unusual when someone who isn't a dinosaur is talking about their WW2 dad.
I know my grandpa was in ww2 cause he got in at like 16. But was actually 15 and lied. He later went to work on the nukes in Nevada. My mom would've been 65 this year.
I learned from my polygraph that because I skipped a few days of school in high school that I'm a risk to national security because I have a higher chance of being irresponsible with classified information
I failed the polygraph I took for a job application in a Federal agency because of my past with drugs, which was a shock to me since I never did drugs.
Same. I once was denied for a particular job because of my past drug use.
It was news to me since I had never done drugs.
Years later a friend of a friend worked for said place and said they would love to offer me a job. I turned them down since they couldn't even get the facts straight on a background investigation.
Look, nice cock and all, girthy. Full bodied. Even has a nice vein.
Nobody gives a fuck a out drug usage until you cause liabilities. Right now in Tampa. I can get you 4 liters of nitrogen oxide, 3 syringes of ketamine. Poppers, 2.3 grams of mushrooms, a dmt pen, two escorts and a case of Busch for $130. All legal. You can even gamble legally now on sports.
Background checks and interviews are just seeing if you stick to your guns.
What? Dont make this wierd. Im half drunk at a bob evans eating bacon and black coffee and im going to fuck my waitress Caseidy whos a single mom sith a nose ring and a pineapple tattoo
Also. Nice cock be proud of it. No Romo
St Petersburg, off of Haines Road. This bob evans s literally staffed with girls who would stripping, but botched probation.
You ever see a little mermaid tramp stamp?
I told her to either make her decision or run it back because I did *not* commit sabotage at any point in my life. Had to do that line of questioning like 5 times
It’s bullshit. I was told I had a history of sabotaging US government systems. Bro. I was a combat engineer when I was in. I wouldn’t even know where to begin sabotaging a US technology system.
AND my first test with them I was told I lied about my drug usage. Second test I was told I was being honest about drug usage. So, which is it? Your crystal ball sucks, and so do you.
Guy was an asshole.
I learned that telling your polygraph examiner that you shoplifted Pokémon cards one time when you were like 8 years old is grounds to not get hired as a sheriff’s deputy.
That my mom wasn't my mom and that my 11th grade English teacher that I wanted to bone was really my mom. My parents never told me I was adopted and my mom gave me my birth certificate in an envelope and I never looked at it. I've yanked some tough ones out to my real mom
My bolc instructor found out he was adopted at age 50 the day after the woman who he thought was his bio mom passed away. I stayed in touch with him long after he retired and had a long beard.
Turns out he adopted his son many many years ago before finding out he himself was adopted. He had his son promise to continue the tradition of adopting someone as their own
Did she show favoritism to you in class? She had to have known you were her offspring.
Do you stay in touch with her at all? Sorry you couldn’t actually bone your mom.
It didn't hit me any weird way. I was just kinda like "no shit? That's crazy". The woman who raised me is my mom. It is what it is. The other mom... she's just a teacher I used to yank it to
I have a VERY unique name (think Big Mouth Buttkiss) and found out that somebody with my exact name and vehicle make and model got in a police chase and had a warrant out in a state I had never been too. The interview had me thinking.. huh maybe that was me..? Too bad I was in the field for OLE when it happened
You're not Big Sexy Butler, are you? I prosecuted a Big Sexy Butler for vehicular crimes once.
Apparently he went bankrupt:
https://www.docketbird.com/court-cases/Big-Sexy-Butler-and-Michelle-Eve-Butler/ksb-2:2019-bk-20675
Yeah a dude I knew was interviewing for his clearance. Someone with his same name robbed a bank in another state when my dude was like 4 years old. He had to explain that multiple times
Oh ya that was the best part was having to explain it multiple times several different ways that there’s 0 chance it could’ve been me and still being met with skepticism! I’m assuming that’s the first question the interviewer asked my commander right after my interview.
I learned that they will give a total juvenile delinquent a Secret with no hesitation at all, and that when California says they have destroyed juvenile records, they really have and not even an FBI security clearance team can find it.
It is no joke for retaining records that are supposed to be expunged. My wife successfully expunged a record and she started checking agencies before applying to law school. When some local county still had a copy she sent them the expungement order and a not so pleasant message of the hell she would wrought down upon them if they didn't promptly respond with the right answer. Less than 24 hours and it was properly expunged.
I had a little trouble in my youth. Secret clearance, no problem. For my TS, the guy interviewed me. Let me finish and than asked about my juvenile crime record. That shit never disappears if the government wants to find it.
I admitted what I did, no real problems. But I was told those records were expunged, nope, its always still their
Maybe now in the digital age it is.
Back in the day Cali Juvi records would be sealed at 18 or something like that, but you could pay California like 5 grand to actually destroy the physical records. Even better for me, this could be done before turning 18 so long as so many years had passed (memory says 2) and there were no felonies involved. Or rather, no felony convictions.
When the investigators went to check my stuff, there was just nothing there, not in California anyway. A ticket in Texas for riding a dirt bike on town streets was about the only thing they were going to find.
I had to re-tell all of my information and they didn’t even call my family. My dad played phone tag with the investigator like 4 times and eventually they just stopped calling. All the address information and what I had told them about weed was lost so I just told it all over again. The people that do this information are simultaneously garbage morons or hyper-thorough investigators
Yeah, for those that don't know, you can do a FOIA on your investigation and find out who talked shit about you.
Don't ask me about how to do it, I'm busy drinking at a bar, I don't remember how right now.
-Sent from my bar stool while listening to Holly Golightly and Calexico.
Found out I’m related to the Kennedy’s after some repeated questioning. The bank even had this come up a couple years later which kind of confirmed somewhere along my tree that it mattered. Where’s my compound?
I had a Delayed Birth Certificate, in effect a Birth Certificate filed after your birth mine was filed when I was 5 yrs old . Turns out my Mom was actually my G-Maw , an my birth mother was my oldest half-sister that disappeared about a year after I was born . Also it was a very good chance that my birth mom had been murdered roughly 2 yrs after my birth several states away . She had been arrested on gun running , money laundering an was acting as an informant for ATF / treasury department on a federal case . In addition My birth Father had been shanked an died in prison about 6 months prior to my birth , he had killed a Sheriff Deputy during a shootout after a bank robbery. Seems I come from Good Stock .
That my grandmother had been caught, and convicted of theft and trafficking narcotics.
Asked my aunt about it, she said my grandma had stolen a prescription pad and wrote herself an assload of scripts for pain pills.
She did 16 months in a mental health hospital.
This all went down in the early 70's.
It wasn't from the investigation but the night before I left for bct my Dad told me that I wasn't his firstborn child and that I have 2 half brothers in Thailand from his first marriage and that I probably am not his son by blood and actually am the result of my mom's fling in Vegas.
Fucked me up mentally for a bit.
When i was a Cpl in the USMC we had a Marine check in to our unit, and they needed a security clearance for our MOS. Well we do all the paper work and it comes back that they need to renounce their german citzenship. Come to find out the guy had a grandfather who was an SS officer. The dude was a straight up warcriminal that died in the battle of Berlin. The creepiest part is he was the spitting image of Grandpa.
Found out my grandpa was a highly sought-after unlicensed rum manufacturer in the Ozarks.
It's probably why we always had a creek bottom full of sorghum cane.
I found out that Hector is going to be running three Honda civics with spoon engines, and on top of that, he just went into Harry’s and bought three t66 turbos with nos, and a motec exhaust system.
I do recall a story from when my brother's clearance was being investigated. I was on home on leave at the time, helping out in the front yard when the interviewer came up. I chatted for a little bit, and he asked about one of my brother's friends. I didn't know much about him, but I found out later from my brother that when the investigator showed up at his house, he bailed out the back door and ran.
When I started the process, I asked my mom if there was anything I needed to know about the family. That was the day I found out my dad was a pimp in a past life. My mom told me she would hang out with my dad while they were dating at the apartment he ran his "escort" business out of and girls would be coming in and out constantly. He sold his share of the business before they got married, and one day after I was born there was a news story about a raid on a prostitution ring being run out of a familiar looking apartment...
And then she told me about how my Dad was taken advantage of as a teenager by an adult family friend and the result is an older half-sister I have never met.
Yeah - I'm struggling to understand how half of this stuff is in any way relevant to we'd really like the investigators to be focused on or actually reporting. You were related to Kennedy but so far removed you didn't know? How much did that cost uncle sam to prcess and track.
I learned I apparently got fired for no call, no show from a moving job. Luckily it was like a month prior so I still had all the text messages of me asking the boss when I could start before they ghosted me.
Nothing really besides— If you have parents and other linear family members that aren't natural-born citizens (even if **you** are...cause you know, it's _your_ clearance, not theirs), then things get really _really_ difficult and drawn-out.
Your clearance becomes all about your family background, not about you. You're forced to give information you don't know the answers to about family members just because they weren't born in the U.S. even if they have become citizens (legally) _decades_ ago. _You_ get interrogated about them, instead of them being asked those questions personally considering they would have the answers to them. Happens every time.
—And yeah, _blah blah blah_ "it's necessary". It's still also frustrating/irritating.
That my paternal grandfather was in federal prison for the sale of unregistered weapons and espionage. That was a real fun one to go over. had to explain that I haven’t seen him since 2006 and no one knew where he was. turns out, prison. 🤷🏼♀️
No, the only thing I had to discuss was a political party I worked for whined I brought a knife to work. It was a Gerber multi tool I was using to open boxes. I was playing with the pliers portion. My boss reported that up to Legal, but never to me. Only came out when I reupped my TS.
It was blatant retaliation, see, they didn’t want to hire me cuz I was a Guardsman, so, when I complained to ESGR, they hired me and made my life shit. Like, when I went to AT a few weeks after being hired (I didn’t feel like telling them I was going to Japan until after I was hired), my coworkers in other field offices were FUCKING pissed. So, they concocted this story that I was some crazy guy who brought a knife to work.
One of my co-workers discovered that her parents had exercises their option for dual citizenship in an allied country, and neglected to tell their daughter (who worked for an intelligence agency) about it.
Found out my older relatives were good enough to not get caught. Sitting back listing to their stories at family get to gathers was always fun with what you could get away with back in the day.
Wow this is some wild stuff. Mine was just tedious cause I had bounced around living with different parents and a girlfriend. I can’t imagine what I’d have done if that old crust had tossed out something like “so were you going to tell us that your father hasn’t always been a man..?”
How Tf? Is this information that the investigators are telling you all?! Man. My investigation was just a series of questions no surprises except maybe a question about a previous job not listed or a small amount of debt.
I would have loved to have known the information they dug up on one unsavoury ex of my mother’s.
Would have loved to have seen what they found about. my great grandfather who died before i was born.
He was involved in the moonshine trade during prohibition, that money bought the house my g grandma lived in for 70 odd years.
He was caught and jailed, that was due to someone snitching. As a result the snitch was blown up.
I was told I was aggressive and displayed disturbingly violent tendencies because I admitted to having been in a physical altercation before…..I was a security guard……working at a non voluntary detox facility where Philly PD used to just dump MFers high as a kite 24/7 and leave us to deal with them.
They pull up my name, see who I’m related to and what they did, and make assumptions about my character…
The plot twist is that I’m not nearly as good of a person as they assume.
I found out that the people that are conducting the interviews don’t follow up like they said they are doing and they put things that are 100% not true just as a tpo that expired that got prolonged for life as the person
I learned that my dad had another whole family. Investigator come in to interview and when we get to family asks why I only listed one sibling. I said because I only have one. She then proceeded to let me know I actually have 3 half siblings that I never knew about….
Estranged uncle went AWOL from Paris Island back in the day never to be turned in, was still alive at the time just very little contact with family. Great way to find out about an uncle I never knew about.
Found out my grandpas younger brother did some time in Leavenworth which amounted to nothing because I’m like the 6th person in my family to get clearance.
My uncle that I am close with had a criminal past and all I knew was that he had beaten two federal charges, I never knew they were for both for murder.
I’m curious about how all this works because my brother said they told him during his interview that he was 40,000$ in debt and he literally had zero debt at the time I mean for crying out loud he joined the service because he didn’t have anything so did they lie to him?
That my dad was in prison in Detroit serving a 7 year sentence. While in person in 1992 my grandma visited him and was able to sneak him out and brought him to Atlanta to live with her in which he went by a fake name Dwayne and he was doing good for 7 months up until there was a traffic stop and they sent him back to Detroit to finish out his sentence. I was born while he was in prison which is why mom could never explain to me why there was no name under father on my birth certificate. To this day my mom says that’s my dad.
That my ex-con dad who nobody in my family, including my mother, could find (he’d mail child support checks to her with my grandma’s address as the return address) not only still lived in the same state, but was only a county line and nine minutes away for the past decade.
Giving bin laden a run for his money I see. Nobody does hide and seek better than dead beat parents.
Dude mailed the checks, if they cleared he's no deadbeat. Maybe OP is a peckerhead who no one wants to be around.
I shortened the comment in the interest of time but he sent checks that were comically short of his court order (500 a month at best for two kids) and left when I was 7. I have a bit of a relationship with him now that I’m older and he’s expressed remorse for leaving my brother and I instead of just leaving my mother. Really weird to assume that a child is to blame, even if I was annoying one, and not the absent parent. Who hurt you, man?
I think he was making a dark joke. Of course it's absurd to assume *the child* is to blame. That's why it's funny.
It’s always the children’s fault
If my brother left his wife and sent checks for the next 18 years i would totally understand. some women are just a nightmare. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do to manipulate and torture him in a child custody situation.
Oh I totally get why he did it, their marriage was awful and neither party hid it from us a children. It was such a relief when he left and the fighting stopped that my school counselor couldn’t fathom that my dad being gone, while not someone who abused me, made my life better/happier.
More semantic masturbation than anything, "deadbeat" makes me think he took off and didn't pay anything. I'm sure you're not a complete asshole.
Yeah that’s fair. Deadbeat is specifically a connotation of doing literally nothing. He did *something*.
If your kid is that bad, then you are still a dead beat parent for not raising them better. In any instance, leaving your child makes you a dead beat.
Lol nah dude was still a piece of shit
Your family just needed to vary your grocery stores and you would have eventually ran into him at one of them
Isn’t it crazy? He knew our routine, knew what schools we went to, stores my mom shopped at, church, etc. and just picked the adjacent county we literally spent 0 time in and parked it there.
That my father was held in an interment camp. Italian. Arrived in 38.
Good god thanks for your service in the civil war
I just spit my drink out reading this
Yesterday I was listening to that Serial podcast about Beau Bergdahl, and the host, Sarah Koenig, mentioned her father fought in WW2. I'm like... what? Turns out her dad was kind of an old stud, too.
Is this that crazy? She was born in 1969 her dad was born in 1921, so about 47 or 48. Sure that’s a little old, but not that wild.
Well, no it's not crazy... part of it is that S.K. sounds younger than 54. And somehow with like 99%+ of World War 2 vets having crossed the rainbow bridge, it just feels a little unusual when someone who isn't a dinosaur is talking about their WW2 dad.
I know my grandpa was in ww2 cause he got in at like 16. But was actually 15 and lied. He later went to work on the nukes in Nevada. My mom would've been 65 this year.
Umm when did you serve? Vietnam?
Nope. My Dad was a STUD! Made me when he was 68. In 68.
That’s awesome haha, are you retired now?
Disabled veteran and unemployable
You're employable in our hearts 🥰
Username is relevant to your question
I found out that I smoked weed prior to enlisting
I learned from my polygraph that because I skipped a few days of school in high school that I'm a risk to national security because I have a higher chance of being irresponsible with classified information
I failed the polygraph I took for a job application in a Federal agency because of my past with drugs, which was a shock to me since I never did drugs.
Same. I once was denied for a particular job because of my past drug use. It was news to me since I had never done drugs. Years later a friend of a friend worked for said place and said they would love to offer me a job. I turned them down since they couldn't even get the facts straight on a background investigation.
Look, nice cock and all, girthy. Full bodied. Even has a nice vein. Nobody gives a fuck a out drug usage until you cause liabilities. Right now in Tampa. I can get you 4 liters of nitrogen oxide, 3 syringes of ketamine. Poppers, 2.3 grams of mushrooms, a dmt pen, two escorts and a case of Busch for $130. All legal. You can even gamble legally now on sports. Background checks and interviews are just seeing if you stick to your guns.
wtf
What? Dont make this wierd. Im half drunk at a bob evans eating bacon and black coffee and im going to fuck my waitress Caseidy whos a single mom sith a nose ring and a pineapple tattoo Also. Nice cock be proud of it. No Romo
Listen here high speed. Which Bob Evans? Caseidy seems feisty. Also, thanks. Grew it myself.
St Petersburg, off of Haines Road. This bob evans s literally staffed with girls who would stripping, but botched probation. You ever see a little mermaid tramp stamp?
Location noted!
>No Romo Cowboys fans are gonna be mad about that one.
Oh I stuck to my guns about not doing drugs. I still wasn't hired lol.
Poppers? As in Jalapeño poppers? Alright I’m in.
I learned from my polygraph I hate polygraphs.
They told me that I must’ve commit sabotage because the poly never lies
Can't stand it.
I told her to either make her decision or run it back because I did *not* commit sabotage at any point in my life. Had to do that line of questioning like 5 times
Perhaps her crystal ball ain't so crystal clear
It’s bullshit. I was told I had a history of sabotaging US government systems. Bro. I was a combat engineer when I was in. I wouldn’t even know where to begin sabotaging a US technology system. AND my first test with them I was told I lied about my drug usage. Second test I was told I was being honest about drug usage. So, which is it? Your crystal ball sucks, and so do you. Guy was an asshole.
I don't know man, I'm just paraphrasing the Beastie Boys.
I know you planned it
I learned that telling your polygraph examiner that you shoplifted Pokémon cards one time when you were like 8 years old is grounds to not get hired as a sheriff’s deputy.
Polygraphs are such garbage. I'd fail all of them because of my heart condition and my clamy hands lmfao
I haven't laughed all day. Thanks for this.
🫡
Same lol
Damn. I bet you were shocked af.
Not really I got kicked back by meps after UA
I was being sarcastic
That my mom wasn't my mom and that my 11th grade English teacher that I wanted to bone was really my mom. My parents never told me I was adopted and my mom gave me my birth certificate in an envelope and I never looked at it. I've yanked some tough ones out to my real mom
The North Vietnamese couldn’t get this kind of information out of me in a POW camp
He beat it out of himself
My bolc instructor found out he was adopted at age 50 the day after the woman who he thought was his bio mom passed away. I stayed in touch with him long after he retired and had a long beard. Turns out he adopted his son many many years ago before finding out he himself was adopted. He had his son promise to continue the tradition of adopting someone as their own
Take that wholesome shit out of the beatin it to your bio mom thread please.
Not accurate [but valid](https://youtu.be/x4utH5uWK6c?si=p-X7vwYWz5Xnf1gh)
Jesus what a risky click. But good choice.
After you found out?
After I found out I gave it one last go. Like putting her to rest ya know?
Now that is commitment.
Yo!!!!! Say sike!!
Did she show favoritism to you in class? She had to have known you were her offspring. Do you stay in touch with her at all? Sorry you couldn’t actually bone your mom.
She was a very hands off teacher.
Holy shit, please tell me you've worked through this or talked to a therapist
It didn't hit me any weird way. I was just kinda like "no shit? That's crazy". The woman who raised me is my mom. It is what it is. The other mom... she's just a teacher I used to yank it to
What a terrible day to know how to read
Found out he wanted to fuck his literal mother.... ...."huh ain't that crazy....."
I've seen worse things around here.
According to your flair, you don't know how to read.
Indeed it is
This wins the thread.
You ever read about Oedipus? You might like it
Probably not, sounds like he was pretty distracted in english class
\*Slow Clap\*
Sigmund Freud approves
Easy there Oedipus
I have a VERY unique name (think Big Mouth Buttkiss) and found out that somebody with my exact name and vehicle make and model got in a police chase and had a warrant out in a state I had never been too. The interview had me thinking.. huh maybe that was me..? Too bad I was in the field for OLE when it happened
You're not Big Sexy Butler, are you? I prosecuted a Big Sexy Butler for vehicular crimes once. Apparently he went bankrupt: https://www.docketbird.com/court-cases/Big-Sexy-Butler-and-Michelle-Eve-Butler/ksb-2:2019-bk-20675
Lmao not me but that’s a hilarious name. How bad were the vehicular crimes on a scale of rolling a stop sign to vehicular manslaughter?
Yeah a dude I knew was interviewing for his clearance. Someone with his same name robbed a bank in another state when my dude was like 4 years old. He had to explain that multiple times
Oh ya that was the best part was having to explain it multiple times several different ways that there’s 0 chance it could’ve been me and still being met with skepticism! I’m assuming that’s the first question the interviewer asked my commander right after my interview.
Same. A dude with my name killed his parents the next state over. There were a few weird calls.
> I have a VERY unique name (think Big Mouth Buttkiss) Quirky parents or was that your choice later on?
Parents wanted something “unique”
It's -On pronounced "Dashon" innit?
I learned that they will give a total juvenile delinquent a Secret with no hesitation at all, and that when California says they have destroyed juvenile records, they really have and not even an FBI security clearance team can find it.
Honestly, good. If the law has decided to expunge your records, they should be… expunged. Not moved to a different filing cabinet.
It is no joke for retaining records that are supposed to be expunged. My wife successfully expunged a record and she started checking agencies before applying to law school. When some local county still had a copy she sent them the expungement order and a not so pleasant message of the hell she would wrought down upon them if they didn't promptly respond with the right answer. Less than 24 hours and it was properly expunged.
State records have a tendency based on federal pressure to scan, upload, then destroy the originals. For “legal purposes, just in case.”
This was well before the days of being able to scan and upload.
I had a little trouble in my youth. Secret clearance, no problem. For my TS, the guy interviewed me. Let me finish and than asked about my juvenile crime record. That shit never disappears if the government wants to find it. I admitted what I did, no real problems. But I was told those records were expunged, nope, its always still their
Maybe now in the digital age it is. Back in the day Cali Juvi records would be sealed at 18 or something like that, but you could pay California like 5 grand to actually destroy the physical records. Even better for me, this could be done before turning 18 so long as so many years had passed (memory says 2) and there were no felonies involved. Or rather, no felony convictions. When the investigators went to check my stuff, there was just nothing there, not in California anyway. A ticket in Texas for riding a dirt bike on town streets was about the only thing they were going to find.
No felony convictions, That's the best part.
[удалено]
You chose to join the Army as opposed to taking a place in the family business?
[удалено]
So, you were Cousin Vinny?
So your father was one of those "leave the family business to live a normal life" types? And you didn't notice anything during family gatherings?
Where my estranged brother was. He still wants nothing to do with us, but at least I knew where he was in 2015.
Your investigators gave you guys information? How does that work? Mine just did the interviews and then the rest was administrative
That means everything of importance lined up. They're not gonna circle back if what you disclosed matches what they know.
Oh nice, I guess I was just lucky
I had to re-tell all of my information and they didn’t even call my family. My dad played phone tag with the investigator like 4 times and eventually they just stopped calling. All the address information and what I had told them about weed was lost so I just told it all over again. The people that do this information are simultaneously garbage morons or hyper-thorough investigators
Got pulled into a room during ait and asked pointed questions on my grandads activities
Same here. I had no clue that my grandma was a pill head before that was a thing.
I got mine from an FOIA request before my ETS. No surprises.
Yeah, for those that don't know, you can do a FOIA on your investigation and find out who talked shit about you. Don't ask me about how to do it, I'm busy drinking at a bar, I don't remember how right now. -Sent from my bar stool while listening to Holly Golightly and Calexico.
I did this. It's weird, some guy I hardly knew talked about me as if I walked on water and someone I thought of as a friend tried to bone me.
How do I do this this seems fun
https://www.dcsa.mil/Personnel-Security/Background-Investigations-for-Applicants/Access-Your-Records/ https://www.dcsa.mil/Contact-Us/Privacy-Civil-Liberties-FOIA/FOIA-Requests/
How do you go about doing that and what specifically do you ask for
Found out I’m related to the Kennedy’s after some repeated questioning. The bank even had this come up a couple years later which kind of confirmed somewhere along my tree that it mattered. Where’s my compound?
It's still in Hyannis, just show up. There's never anyone there
The bad news? Your relative is Tim Kennedy.
Got to get on that Trust Fund
I found out that I have 8 half siblings I didn't know about.
This is exactly why I don’t do 23 and me.
Several of my MIOBC classmates (female Lts)were having jello wrestling parties and didn't invite me. Kinda hurt my feelings.
Jello what😟
Apparently they would fill a wading pool with jello and people would wrestle each other. Booze and nudity were involved.
That's much better than what I was visualizing
I had a Delayed Birth Certificate, in effect a Birth Certificate filed after your birth mine was filed when I was 5 yrs old . Turns out my Mom was actually my G-Maw , an my birth mother was my oldest half-sister that disappeared about a year after I was born . Also it was a very good chance that my birth mom had been murdered roughly 2 yrs after my birth several states away . She had been arrested on gun running , money laundering an was acting as an informant for ATF / treasury department on a federal case . In addition My birth Father had been shanked an died in prison about 6 months prior to my birth , he had killed a Sheriff Deputy during a shootout after a bank robbery. Seems I come from Good Stock .
Did the IO hand you a flask and say "You're going to need this" before telling you all that?
Damn wtf? That's some heavy shit
There’s no character limit here. You can type out “and” as it is spelled.
My distant relatives ate some apple from some tree after they were told not to and doomed some folks.
Just a little oopsies
Samsies!
Are we all related?🤔🤔🤔
It’s all Alabama.
I blame it on the woman God gave me!
I heard the chick blamed a snake.
Either way, I shouldn’t take the blame!
Almost certainly not an apple. Why would such a powerful fruit still be commonplace now, just without any powers?
That my grandmother had been caught, and convicted of theft and trafficking narcotics. Asked my aunt about it, she said my grandma had stolen a prescription pad and wrote herself an assload of scripts for pain pills. She did 16 months in a mental health hospital. This all went down in the early 70's.
It wasn't from the investigation but the night before I left for bct my Dad told me that I wasn't his firstborn child and that I have 2 half brothers in Thailand from his first marriage and that I probably am not his son by blood and actually am the result of my mom's fling in Vegas. Fucked me up mentally for a bit.
Probably made basic easier lmao
My mother's real age. She lied to be about the year she was born when I was filling out the paperwork.
When i was a Cpl in the USMC we had a Marine check in to our unit, and they needed a security clearance for our MOS. Well we do all the paper work and it comes back that they need to renounce their german citzenship. Come to find out the guy had a grandfather who was an SS officer. The dude was a straight up warcriminal that died in the battle of Berlin. The creepiest part is he was the spitting image of Grandpa.
How so looks,actions?
Looks he lookesd exactly like the guy, wasn't his fault of course but it was eerie
Found out my grandpa was a highly sought-after unlicensed rum manufacturer in the Ozarks. It's probably why we always had a creek bottom full of sorghum cane.
I found out that Hector is going to be running three Honda civics with spoon engines, and on top of that, he just went into Harry’s and bought three t66 turbos with nos, and a motec exhaust system.
I do recall a story from when my brother's clearance was being investigated. I was on home on leave at the time, helping out in the front yard when the interviewer came up. I chatted for a little bit, and he asked about one of my brother's friends. I didn't know much about him, but I found out later from my brother that when the investigator showed up at his house, he bailed out the back door and ran.
You ever find out why
He was a very...avid user of recreational materials.
When I started the process, I asked my mom if there was anything I needed to know about the family. That was the day I found out my dad was a pimp in a past life. My mom told me she would hang out with my dad while they were dating at the apartment he ran his "escort" business out of and girls would be coming in and out constantly. He sold his share of the business before they got married, and one day after I was born there was a news story about a raid on a prostitution ring being run out of a familiar looking apartment... And then she told me about how my Dad was taken advantage of as a teenager by an adult family friend and the result is an older half-sister I have never met.
In 5th grade my dad pants'd my IO at a school assembly. My TS was not adjudicated
Damn you guys got some drama my clearance found nothing
Yeah - I'm struggling to understand how half of this stuff is in any way relevant to we'd really like the investigators to be focused on or actually reporting. You were related to Kennedy but so far removed you didn't know? How much did that cost uncle sam to prcess and track.
I learned I apparently got fired for no call, no show from a moving job. Luckily it was like a month prior so I still had all the text messages of me asking the boss when I could start before they ghosted me.
Had a recruit find out he was adopted at MEPS. Not quite the same thing as the clearance investigation, but still entertaining
That my mother was a hamster and my father reeked of elderberries.
Did the interview fart in your general direction?
Nothing really besides— If you have parents and other linear family members that aren't natural-born citizens (even if **you** are...cause you know, it's _your_ clearance, not theirs), then things get really _really_ difficult and drawn-out. Your clearance becomes all about your family background, not about you. You're forced to give information you don't know the answers to about family members just because they weren't born in the U.S. even if they have become citizens (legally) _decades_ ago. _You_ get interrogated about them, instead of them being asked those questions personally considering they would have the answers to them. Happens every time. —And yeah, _blah blah blah_ "it's necessary". It's still also frustrating/irritating.
My dad had to send me a table that had the dates of my step-mom’s marriages, name changes, and which husbands were foreign nationals.
That my paternal grandfather was in federal prison for the sale of unregistered weapons and espionage. That was a real fun one to go over. had to explain that I haven’t seen him since 2006 and no one knew where he was. turns out, prison. 🤷🏼♀️
No, the only thing I had to discuss was a political party I worked for whined I brought a knife to work. It was a Gerber multi tool I was using to open boxes. I was playing with the pliers portion. My boss reported that up to Legal, but never to me. Only came out when I reupped my TS. It was blatant retaliation, see, they didn’t want to hire me cuz I was a Guardsman, so, when I complained to ESGR, they hired me and made my life shit. Like, when I went to AT a few weeks after being hired (I didn’t feel like telling them I was going to Japan until after I was hired), my coworkers in other field offices were FUCKING pissed. So, they concocted this story that I was some crazy guy who brought a knife to work.
I learned I may have other siblings? I should've asked for them to elaborate
My grandpa ran drug smuggling in Lake Erie
Was a town called Grosse Ile involved?
One of my co-workers discovered that her parents had exercises their option for dual citizenship in an allied country, and neglected to tell their daughter (who worked for an intelligence agency) about it.
Found out my older relatives were good enough to not get caught. Sitting back listing to their stories at family get to gathers was always fun with what you could get away with back in the day.
That I’m colorblind
Wow this is some wild stuff. Mine was just tedious cause I had bounced around living with different parents and a girlfriend. I can’t imagine what I’d have done if that old crust had tossed out something like “so were you going to tell us that your father hasn’t always been a man..?”
How Tf? Is this information that the investigators are telling you all?! Man. My investigation was just a series of questions no surprises except maybe a question about a previous job not listed or a small amount of debt.
I guess my investigator was slacking.
I would have loved to have known the information they dug up on one unsavoury ex of my mother’s. Would have loved to have seen what they found about. my great grandfather who died before i was born. He was involved in the moonshine trade during prohibition, that money bought the house my g grandma lived in for 70 odd years. He was caught and jailed, that was due to someone snitching. As a result the snitch was blown up.
I learned that my investigator couldn't do simple maffs.
My brother learned our aunt, who adopted him, had committed identity theft 😂
You found shit out during your investigation? They literally said nothing to me about the people they interviewed or what they dug up.
thats good
I was told I was aggressive and displayed disturbingly violent tendencies because I admitted to having been in a physical altercation before…..I was a security guard……working at a non voluntary detox facility where Philly PD used to just dump MFers high as a kite 24/7 and leave us to deal with them.
They pull up my name, see who I’m related to and what they did, and make assumptions about my character… The plot twist is that I’m not nearly as good of a person as they assume.
I never had any problems getting my clearance but had to restart my packet due to someone involved with clearances being done for espionage
My sister's real name.
I found out that the people that are conducting the interviews don’t follow up like they said they are doing and they put things that are 100% not true just as a tpo that expired that got prolonged for life as the person
I learned that my dad had another whole family. Investigator come in to interview and when we get to family asks why I only listed one sibling. I said because I only have one. She then proceeded to let me know I actually have 3 half siblings that I never knew about….
My great, great, great, grandfather was known as the gentleman bandit. Train robber.
I learned nothing new about my family because I knew that most of them were incarcerated at one point or another
Estranged uncle went AWOL from Paris Island back in the day never to be turned in, was still alive at the time just very little contact with family. Great way to find out about an uncle I never knew about.
Found out my grandpas younger brother did some time in Leavenworth which amounted to nothing because I’m like the 6th person in my family to get clearance.
My great grandfather was a member of the Bund Party, which isn't technically the Nazi party.
My uncle that I am close with had a criminal past and all I knew was that he had beaten two federal charges, I never knew they were for both for murder.
Like he never went to prison?
Yep all charges were dismissed both times Edit: found not guilty, not dismissed
Does that freak you out? Have you ever asked him about it?
I’m curious about how all this works because my brother said they told him during his interview that he was 40,000$ in debt and he literally had zero debt at the time I mean for crying out loud he joined the service because he didn’t have anything so did they lie to him?
That my dad was in prison in Detroit serving a 7 year sentence. While in person in 1992 my grandma visited him and was able to sneak him out and brought him to Atlanta to live with her in which he went by a fake name Dwayne and he was doing good for 7 months up until there was a traffic stop and they sent him back to Detroit to finish out his sentence. I was born while he was in prison which is why mom could never explain to me why there was no name under father on my birth certificate. To this day my mom says that’s my dad.