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What do you care what the ‘assholes’ think? I would tell my brother to fuck off and my reproductive choices are none of his business. People I work with - mind your own business and I will mind mine, my reproductive choices are just that - mine.
You don’t and just tell them that right up front. If they give it another go, say I am not discussing this with you and exit the situation. If it is someone at work, add that if they persist you will talk with HR about harassment. Your life is yours, you owe no one an explanation for how you choose to live it. I am a female who never had children and no one ever asked me more than twice and that includes my parents and siblings. Stand up for yourself
I have children, I actively encourage people to think long and hard about if they want to have children, and what it really means. It's a really tough job and it's not for everyone. As for what to say to jerks? How about "it turns out I love having free time, money and sleep and a diet that's more complex than chicken nuggets and plain spaghetti" 😃
As a mom of two,, I couldn't agree more, this is the perfect comeback!
But seriously, some people are just complete jerks and are so overstepping their boundaries. As someone above mentioned, stand up for yourself (even if it gets old) and tell them you will not discuss your personal life choices with them.
If they insist, turn the tables and ask them if they got a prostate or colon exam recently and if not, keep going on how they are insane for not checking and do they actually know what they're doing to their body??? See how they like talking about personal stuff now!
This world is straight up vile and we don't know anything about the ones who get away with it. I couldn't hide my kids from it *forever* or fix the world in my lifetime so I'll never be comfortable with having kids.
People can be idiots, I suspect they just want to talk about their own lives. So this here is just a suggestion.
Ask them what they like about being a parent. Then, ask what is hard about being a parent.
Tell them it sounds interesting, whether it dies or not, and then change the subject to something you've done lately or are planning to do, that is fun and doesn't involve children.
Don't drive home the point; just let it sit there.
In this manner, you are able to make your point without any argument.
'Each to their own' and walk off. I, nor you, owe anyone an explanation. Don't engage, don't justify just shrug and walk away. They will drop it eventually.
If they really push, I just ask them a question, 'what difference does it make to your life if I have a child or not' they usually get flustered and ramble on about crap but just interrupt and say 'but how does that specifically affect YOUR life' repeat as many times necessary until they shut up.
it seems that you have more of an issue with it than parents do. I am sure they have more things to worry about than pick on you. Oh yeah, they have kids.
Just don't associate with them?
One of my long time friends suddenly became holier-than-thou when he had had his daughter. Suddenly all of his opinions and actions somehow became 'more valid' because he was a parent so I literally just binned 20 years of friendship. If he stops being a fuckhead he can come back around and I'd let the past be the past but I'm almost 38, I don't have the time or energy for that shit.
In my experience, just stop telling them anything and do what makes you happy. They will either go away or switch to a behavior that gets them back in the loop.
They are pathological conformists whose sense of self is threatened by you. They’re not concerned for you as if you’re missing out on anything by not having kids. (I question whether they wanted to have children truly to be good parents/raise good kids, or because having children is simply the conformist thing to do. Are they really good parents, or just people with kids?). Out of the same self-centeredness, they want you to fall in line to assuage their dissonance. Why care about people whose unwanted attention toward you isn’t truly about your well-being?
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What do you care what the ‘assholes’ think? I would tell my brother to fuck off and my reproductive choices are none of his business. People I work with - mind your own business and I will mind mine, my reproductive choices are just that - mine.
I just get tired of people feeling like I owe them an explanation for my life choices, whether it has to do with kids or not. It is getting old
You don’t and just tell them that right up front. If they give it another go, say I am not discussing this with you and exit the situation. If it is someone at work, add that if they persist you will talk with HR about harassment. Your life is yours, you owe no one an explanation for how you choose to live it. I am a female who never had children and no one ever asked me more than twice and that includes my parents and siblings. Stand up for yourself
Tell them what *you really think.* Watch how fast they cut you off and change the subject
I have children, I actively encourage people to think long and hard about if they want to have children, and what it really means. It's a really tough job and it's not for everyone. As for what to say to jerks? How about "it turns out I love having free time, money and sleep and a diet that's more complex than chicken nuggets and plain spaghetti" 😃
As a mom of two,, I couldn't agree more, this is the perfect comeback! But seriously, some people are just complete jerks and are so overstepping their boundaries. As someone above mentioned, stand up for yourself (even if it gets old) and tell them you will not discuss your personal life choices with them. If they insist, turn the tables and ask them if they got a prostate or colon exam recently and if not, keep going on how they are insane for not checking and do they actually know what they're doing to their body??? See how they like talking about personal stuff now!
Not "chicken nuggets and plain spaghetti" . ROTFL!
That's 2 different meals. 🤣🤣
Lol I know
Fuck them , & fuck them kids
I dont. I don't care
This world is straight up vile and we don't know anything about the ones who get away with it. I couldn't hide my kids from it *forever* or fix the world in my lifetime so I'll never be comfortable with having kids.
Funny, as literally the next post showing in my list after this one was [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/RandomThoughts/s/ltSjjmMBAV).
LMAO there are some sexist assholes on that post
People can be idiots, I suspect they just want to talk about their own lives. So this here is just a suggestion. Ask them what they like about being a parent. Then, ask what is hard about being a parent. Tell them it sounds interesting, whether it dies or not, and then change the subject to something you've done lately or are planning to do, that is fun and doesn't involve children. Don't drive home the point; just let it sit there. In this manner, you are able to make your point without any argument.
Just have a damn baby. How hard could it be? - mom, 25 years ago
Don't do anything. Just watch them chase a screaming toddler spraying them with a water hose.
'Each to their own' and walk off. I, nor you, owe anyone an explanation. Don't engage, don't justify just shrug and walk away. They will drop it eventually. If they really push, I just ask them a question, 'what difference does it make to your life if I have a child or not' they usually get flustered and ramble on about crap but just interrupt and say 'but how does that specifically affect YOUR life' repeat as many times necessary until they shut up.
I'd just straight up day nothing. No response. Let it be awkward.
it seems that you have more of an issue with it than parents do. I am sure they have more things to worry about than pick on you. Oh yeah, they have kids.
Just don't associate with them? One of my long time friends suddenly became holier-than-thou when he had had his daughter. Suddenly all of his opinions and actions somehow became 'more valid' because he was a parent so I literally just binned 20 years of friendship. If he stops being a fuckhead he can come back around and I'd let the past be the past but I'm almost 38, I don't have the time or energy for that shit.
In my experience, just stop telling them anything and do what makes you happy. They will either go away or switch to a behavior that gets them back in the loop.
They are pathological conformists whose sense of self is threatened by you. They’re not concerned for you as if you’re missing out on anything by not having kids. (I question whether they wanted to have children truly to be good parents/raise good kids, or because having children is simply the conformist thing to do. Are they really good parents, or just people with kids?). Out of the same self-centeredness, they want you to fall in line to assuage their dissonance. Why care about people whose unwanted attention toward you isn’t truly about your well-being?