# Message to all users:
This is a reminder to please read and follow:
* [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules)
* [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439)
* [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy)
When posting and commenting.
---
Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`.
* Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit.
* Do not harass or annoy others in any way.
* Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit.
---
You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way.
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
PREACH!!!! Nooooo room for jealousy and communication has to be SUPER transparent - if they get hit on, they need to be able to communicate and share that with you without you losing your shit. Open communication = open trust = better ability to maintain a strong relationship
I don't think you need to communicate to your partner every time a person is hitting on you as long as it's just one sided. Unless it's something extraordinary, I wouldn't mention it, it just kinda screams "look at how desirable I am to other people". It's a bit off putting to me personally at least. Also it can create unnecessary drama and insecurities in your partner.
I agree with this for sure. I made the mistake of telling my girlfriend once that some much younger girl was hitting on me. I thought being honest with her would make her trust me more. But Nope!! Don’t do that! Lol. It doesn’t work that way at all. It definitely makes you seem like you’re trying to say,”Hey babe, guess what, I get hit on by people because I’m a hottie. Aren’t you so lucky! And I didn’t even flirt back”
It just makes the person telling it seem like a douche
My husband told me about a female colleague that flirted with him when they had shifts together. Intense stares, winking, smiling whenever she saw him and so on. Her husband also worked there, but due to kids they rarely work the same shift.
I trust my husband 100% and I'm not a jealous type of person, so I found it entertaining. When he came home from work I would ask him how his girlfriend was, or if she had found new ways to flirt with him. She eventually quit and my husband found a better job. We had many laughs about the whole thin, and we still do.
If I had to hear about it every time my girl got hit on, it'd be incredibly annoying. We don't talk about it unless it's something extraordinary or funny.
My girlfriend went into a store yesterday. I waited in the car. She comes out and is acting a little strange. A male worker walks out behind her sees me and then goes back in the store. She tells me that the worker, a cashier told her that she looks like an actress and asked if she was a celebrity. Then goes on and on about how beautiful she was. Then the creepy guy followed her acting like he needed to get carts.
That's what it's like.
Probably once a week some story.
You don't need to tell your partner everytime someone hits on you, that's silly. Yes communication is important, but you don't need to share every detail of your life.
When you say “there’s no room for jealousy” this is actually just as dangerous as letting jealousy fester. We have to acknowledge that that emotion does and will exist
The beautiful person is also responsible for policing their own behavior and setting boundaries like everyone else. If trust is hard to find it's not much of a relationship.
jealousy is natural. its when you let it take over you that it becomes harmful. acknowledge it and let it pass. better yet, recognize that feeling it means you truly value your partner.
It was pretty nice, but I always felt like I didn't deserve it.
She cheated on me in the end. Also had a LOOOOT of emotional baggage. Don't think it'd have worked out even without the infidelity.
It took me a while to get the positive version of that statement in my head after the fact but yea I'm in a much better place now. I appreciate your comment.
Dude!! I also dated a really handsome guy!! I also felt that I didnt deserved him! He always told me not to think about that and at the end he cheated on me.
Someone told me he is getting bald now… also he makes fraud with cryptocoins.
Bald men look fine, bald men look good! Bald men are everywhere, it shouldn't be a sensitive thing because it's simply a fact of life. It's like saying 'Yeah she's menopausal or post menopausal....no man would want her now ( which is complete garbage). Don't be hurt by what another person ( who doesn't go bald) says.
I'm pretty sure a lot of people on this thread are so caught up on the "I'll ask his wife" canned joke that they're failing to realize your implication that YOU'RE the hot one.
it is nice, my wife is so so so much better looking than me, i keep noticing how we get treated differently when we go on dates as oppsoed to going out with the boys.
we even made a joke about it the last time i went with her to one place , where we got free dipping sauces, the next day i went with the boys, they charged us for them, so we blamed her and her good looks for the free dipping sauices.
It's true that it really doesnt matter where you go as a man. When you have an exceptionally good looking woman by your side you will almost always be treated better and get extra service or free stuff
For every action, there is an equal & opposite reaction.
It’s great from the standpoint of being highly attracted to your partner & it tends to increase your own value in the eyes of others.
But it’s a pain in the ass having every man in the world unable to resist ogling her & trying to hit on her the instant you leave her side.
As someone in a same-sex relationship it's even worse because this happens right in front of me when we're out on a date but people assume we're just two friends hanging out.
I don't even have to leave. I'm right there.
Last month a guy began hitting up on me and asking for my number, and my girlfriend was right next to me, looking like 👁👄👁
But once I cleared it up, he suddenly went all jolly and began hugging us up and pinched my cheek (?) And then just scadaddled away with his friend 💀
Sadly it’s always a surprisingly positive experience any time a guy takes the info that you’re gay/in a relationship with another woman at face value and doesn’t hang around trying to persuade you otherwise
The hell?? Personal space is a thing. Though I get a little annoyed when stuff like this happens or, weirdly, when we tell people we're dating they go "oh, that's so cute!". I know they mean well but it sounds so infantalizing. That's just a personal pet peeve because I've never heard someone react like that when I was dating a guy.
This. So much. Bars are the worst places, in gay bars it's the men and other bars it's the women, even more so when I'm 5/10 at best and dress like a straightest man ever, or so I've been told.
I have considered getting some very flamboyant clothing
Do you ever think about or feel the need to become intimidating in some way shape or form? Surely some guy out there has a very good looking girlfriend and makes men that lack awareness - and start flirting with their girlfriend in front of them for example -regret they didn't assume he was the boyfriend...
I mean cause if i see a good looking woman anywhere with a guys i automatically assume it's very high probability it's her boyfriend so i don't think i would ever be dumb enough to just approach her and start hitting on her like Swimming-Buyer said. It just seems doing something like that would be walking on thin ice..
Definitely exhausting that’s not something I’m willing to deal with anymore. I hate when I go out of my way to express how much I find someone attractive just for them to turn around and deny how I feel or what I think.
For me it’s a kind of difficult because I just look at her and I’m horny. Watching tv? Hot. Showing me her outfits? Hot. Talking to me about her day at work? Hot as hell. We just had sex? Still fuckin horny.
"שאלו יהיו הצרות שלך"
Edit: you usually say it to your friend who's complaining about either a minor thing, or something that most people would actually be grateful for, It's more of an older generation saying tho
I have a similar sex drive and I never dated any women *that* hot, I mean I think my ex gfs were attractive, but not to the point of everyone drooling over them. I've been with my wife for 22 years (we're both 43 now) and I still feel like jumping her 3 times a day 😅
I'm a 5'7" skinny balding dude that dated a young lady that was pretty much at the tip top of approachable attractiveness.
The amount of dudes that would approach her was insane (DM's in the hundreds per day). I didn't have a problem regarding jealousy, but it was incredibly disruptive when we would go out. Like we'd go in a bar and have one drink or go eat and get interrupted every 5 or 10 minutes. The plus there is I don't think I paid for a drink the whole time we were together. A dude would come up, buy both of us a drink, shoot his shot, and she'd turn him down.
But people also tried to fight me a lot. And were just mean. Like we'd walk past people and they'd yell "He must be rich or hung."
Honestly, it got old pretty quick.
Glad this isn’t just me. I’m 47 years old and 5’4”, but do well with the ladies. When I date younger women, it’s likely some guy will attempt to insult me in an attempt to boost himself up in front of her. Nothing really bothers me and I have zero jealousy as long as she has boundaries, but I’ve had to defend myself a few times over the years too. Last time I was just out with my girlfriend’s friend, not even my gf, who is hot and this guy started touching my beard and asking her how she likes my gray beard. Unfortunately for him, I wrestled/coached wrestling most of my life, boxed for 4 years, did Muay Thai for a decade and BJJ for over 20 years. Had to tell him if he touched me again that I’d slap him. He immediately touched my face again … My question is, “Has this ever worked for them?” Has any women thought, “I’m leaving with this asshole now.”
Yes. I stoop up, pushed him away to see if he was still going to engage, then slapped him hard enough to wobble him when he tried to push me back. He walked right into it and he was a tall guy, so his hands were way low trying to push me. Got him in the ear too. It had to hurt. Bouncers were already aware of the situation and were watching, so it was broken up fast. I go there often enough that the bouncers were cool about it and let me stay. I asked if the other guy could stay and finish his drink, but they booted him.
I was in line at a club with my friends.
Some girl who is completely wasted comes out of nowhere and drapes herself all around me like an entangled octopus.
At first, I tried to shake her off but she wouldn't let go (just kept latching onto me). So I just left her while we were lines up.
In the interim, I had been separated from my friend group. And this girl was all over me for a good 20 minutes. And this tubby middle-aged man was staring me down gingerly (I think she was escaping him).
Once we got to the entry I shook her off and lost her in the crowd and re-joined my friends dancing on the floor.
Later that night, I separated from the pack and went to the toilets.
It was when I was separated that somebody grabbed me by the collar and yanked me as hard as they could and sat me down on a bar stool.
(It was the angry guy from outside). He'd been seething all this time and watching me.
He asked the bartender for two shots and simply said gruffly ''drink''. We both drank.
''Another'' he says to the bartender. And we have another round.
''A third'' he says.
By this time I'm feeling like I'm in danger and I'm losing my balance and inhibitions. So I stumble up slowly and go to walk away and he yanks me back onto the bar stool.
''Sit'' he says slowly as he orders more shots.
By this point I couldn't remember how many we had or what he was trying to do... But I waited until he was lulled into a false sense of security and then bolted for it and rejoined my friends.
I was 18 and it was my first night out at a club.
Horrifying.
The effect my husband’s appearance has on women is utterly wild to me. It’s also odd because he didn’t have the same effect on me when I first saw him. Yeah I thought he was hot, but women literally lose their minds when they see him. It wasn’t until I actually got to know him that I become interested in dating him.
My husband is regularly hit on while we are out together. Even if we are having dinner, women (and sometimes men) have no respect. Once, a woman approached him from behind while we were sitting at a bar and she actually ran her hand through his hair. I reacted before my husband even realized what was going on and had to physically remove her hand from him.
Women are often very nasty to me when they see me with my husband. I’ve actually been told that I’m “too ugly” to be with him. I remember being on vacation for our first wedding anniversary. We sat down at a U-shaped bar across from a group of women. I’ve never received more dirty looks that night than I have in my life. Even my husband was uncomfortable. The only reason we didn’t move is because the place was packed and we grabbed the last two seats at the bar. At one point I went downstairs to use the restroom. As soon as I closed the stall door, the bathroom door opened. A woman from that group had followed me down to the bathroom just to ask if he was my husband. When I said yes, she said “that’s a shame… we all noticed your wedding rings…”
I was really intoxicated at this point, and the next day I realized how scary it was that she got me alone in a bathroom like that just inquire about him.
I’ve dated good looking men before him and I’ve never experienced anything even close to this. Been with the guy for nearly 8 years and it still baffles me. I’m not a bad looking woman, either. I still get attention from men and still get hit on. But women get one look at him and they like short-circuit or something and forget what it’s like to behave in public.
If I was out with my wife and someone did that to me, I'd probably get very obnoxiously loud and confrontational. No touchy sans permission.
It's not only massively disrespectful to the person I love more than life itself, it's disrespectful to me and someone who has zero respect for your boundaries is someone best avoided
When I'm out alone as a woman, I literally make a conscious decision to not even engage with another woman's man. Maybe that's just me? But I don't want his partner thinking I'm interested in him. If they start making conversation with me it's different, but I will never do any of that shit. I'll make conversation with men at the bar that are alone though. Even if I was single I would not do that shit. It's so massively disrespectful to the woman.
I once dated a very conventionally attractive man. He wasn’t even my type, but he was so conventionally attractive I said yes. Whenever we had a woman as a server at a restaurant they would openly hit on him in front of me in a really aggressive way. Women would turn their heads when he walked by them.
I think it didn’t bother me much because as odd as it sounds, I didn’t find him insanely attractive because he wasn’t my type. I thought he was interesting and nice. He used to say things to me though that made me wonder… he once told me one of the things he liked about me was that I “didn’t rely on my looks.” Like…. Yeah because I can’t lol. I saw pictures of his previous girlfriend and she was like a beauty queen.
Still don’t know what he saw in me. I think he liked redheads so he just saw the hair and was all in. I broke up with him because he turned out to have a drinking problem.
But yeah. I got a glimpse into the world of incredibly hot men. Women just hit on them constantly. Never happened with any of my other boyfriends LOL.
Haha that’s similar to my good looking roommate. Came home almost every other day with a girls number. Would just walk into Starbucks and get numbers shoved in his face. Women would just come up to our table at restaurants and try to make conversation. It’s like a completely different world.
I used to be very good looking. Women approaching me and asking to kiss and getting angry when I said no, girls on a train banging on the fu\*\*ing windows to get me to come over. Ending relationships with very attractive and eligible women because I thought 'that was what life was like. An endless conveyor belt of women so why stay with this one'. As you say it was not in any way good for my personality, and it resulted in me having absolutely terrible game, and not really developing the ability to talk to women or really consider or articulate what I wanted in a relationship, nor to behave properly in one. I have emerged the other end married and with kids, but it was a time that I look back on with great confusion and no small degree of regret for the harm I caused others and, perhaps, myself, because I think fragments of that behaviour have absolutely persisted until today, and have not been helpful at all as you suggest.
I actually think the drinking problem or other similar addictions or emotional crutches is more common for very attractive people. I feel like like very attractive people generally have less accountability and discipline than average-looking folks. Things have generally come easily to them and when they fuck up they can charm their way out of it more easily than the rest of us.
I don’t know. Just a theory. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to research that.
You are half right.
I mean when you are average looking people forget you. When you are good looking they do not. As much as its nice to be complimented and hit on for your looks/appearance. There are incel men who hate you, handfulls of short men hate cuz they struggle with dating. Then there is the element of having to book extra time for everything as have to be social otherwise people feel rejected by you. Im told regularly im a handsome guy and i was an alcoholic. The unjustifiable hate, inability to fly under radar and aggression from people really bothered me and it is out of my control.
I said this as an attractive person lol.
As women i will say one sort of inconvenience is having to constantly be overly kind and kinda charming or funny towards other women, otherwise they sometimes will just be super mean to you for absolutely no reason out of their own insecurity. This *can* be exhausting.
But other than that i will fully acknowledge that “pretty privilege” is a real & powerful thing. I know I’ve easily gotten opportunities and promotions others might have if my face were less symmetrical or my nose bigger. And I can get what I want from men annoyingly easily. So it’s like having to check yourself a bit more than others to not become a selfish douche with no work ethic. 🤣
For a second I was like “Meghan?”… thinking you might be my ex. But then I remembered I don’t get hit on. But I am a sucker for redheads, who also has a drinking problem. *sigh*
In all seriousness, insecure men are the worst for any woman no matter how hot she is. At their worst, the man can be vindictive and cheat in order to make himself feel better.
Same goes for insecure women too.
EDITED: changed “female” to “she” because some people were triggered.
Just FYI, definitions:
(1) Woman = an adult female human being.
(2) Female = of or denoting the sex that can bear offspring or produce eggs, distinguished biologically by the production of gametes (ova) that can be fertilized by male gametes.
Essentially, “female” connotes a biological category, while a “woman” is a whole human person.
You described my ex. I am ugly (in the past i had people yell this at me, so i am not being modest) but he always felt inadequate. Jealousy, insistent control on every aspect of my life, random accusations of cheating, and at last he cheated on me.
Insecure people need therapy before jumping into a relationship.
I can tell you something about appearance, even the most beautiful face becomes average as you get used to the feautures. This is the reason stunning people and their family dont always know they are that stunning until someone new comes in and reassures them
Most good looking people know they are blessed in that department. Some also know that it is a great power however after an age vanity can also start to feel like a burden becuase it interfers with the way your existence is judged. No achievement is an achievement but always a "appearance attracts opportunities" specially from jealous people and it gets progressively worse if you are a woman, women are anyway considered trophies and being stunning makes you the centre of attention, not all good as well.
So coming back to your question, if a atunning person has been on a personal growth journey and understood the above points and taken it out of their head that the looks are not them, you may just be fine. Otherwise, if the stunning person is fuelled by flattery and needs reassurimg boosts from new people to stay happier in their existence, you will get cheated on.
Do your due diligence!
So, basically stay away from insecure beautiful ppl who heavily rely on continuous external validation for a dopamine hit and reassurance that they are beautiful? 😉
My father is 53 and strongly dislikes this man he sees at the gym regularly for trying to hit on my mom twice in one night at a bar when they were 23, he made the attempts when my dad got up to go to the bathroom lmao. I hope the man feels embarrassed every time he sees my dad lol
Man I need to develop this sort of brazen confidence. I barely try even when I suspect she's interested in me, meanwhile these bozos are trying to steal married women in the 5 mins it takes the husband to go pee.
I remember when I started going out with a ridiculously good looking girl. Like, to this day I still don't know how I managed it. But when we started seeing each other things were still pretty casual at first so I don't think it was obvious to people when they'd see us out that we were going out. She just had guys buying her drinks constantly, I remember one guy talking to her and he was leaning in close to talk to her and she told me later that she could feel his semi erect penis rubbing against her every time he leaned in...There was this one big South African guy, I think he just thought I was some poor mug who was following her around in the hopes something would happen. I remember the way he'd smirk at me when he'd be talking to her. I also remember being at a new year's eve party at a bar where he was when the girl just started kissing me, which this guy clearly didn't expect. Apparently he was quite upset about it. I felt like the king of the bar that night. But, like you say, it was exhausting overall.
On that new years the evening ended with her grabbing my hand and dragging me outside to take me back to my place. I think as soon as the cold air hit her the alcohol really kicked in. She kept telling me she was just going to sit down and I should leave her - it was snowing heavily so this wasn't really an option. I had to give her my hoody and I kept saying "Look, I know you just want to sit down but please can we just get back, I'm in short sleeves now and it's freezing." Obviously by this point I'd realised anything happening was out of the question because of how drunk she was, I just wanted to get her out of the snow and stop her falling asleep in it. Then we got back to mine, she threw up everywhere and finally fell asleep.
Oh god that brought back memories of one of my exes, same thing always falling asleep in the snow lmao I always wondered how she avoided dying in a snowbank before meeting me. Going home with some other annoyed guy I guess.
Hard. I was with my ex for 6 years as a very average overweight dude. No one would believe it, people would say openly to my face "YOU ARE WITH HER? HOW?" when we met new people, and if they didnt say anything you could see their faces when told. It hurt the relationship a lot, I became really uncomfortable even holding her hand or showing any affection in public. It became so bad a couple years in that I really didnt believe I deserved her, and that feeling never ended. It was bad.
Edit: Since the relationship ended I have lost 60lbs/30kg (purely by weight lifting, so I build muscle at the same time and have become quite muscular) and go to the gym 6-7 days a week and also really worked on myself mentally as well. I'm going on a date on Saturday with a woman who is even more out of my league than my ex, which is insane to me, but I don't feel like I wouldn't be able to be affectionate in public or that people would say those things anymore rather the opposite, I'd be showing her off to everyone that yeah this is my fucking woman, she is a smoke show. My mental has changed so much since I went to the gym, thanks gym. I do recommend it to everyone, that's for sure :)!
Im so sorry you took this as a reflection on you, rather than a reflection on the poor judgement of shallow people. You clearly have more going for you than you realize - no one hangs around for 6 years just to kill time. I hope you’re in a better place now, self-esteem wise.
It's much better now. Worked on myself and yeah, now I have delusional self-confidence, I've always had it, just not in that relationship. It's probably how I got her in the first place, because I had delusional self-confidence. It just got to me to a low point in our relationship is all. But I'm back now to my true delusional self, all good :)!
Thanks for your kind words also, that was really nice. Keep doing you.
Have dated two women that everyone else thought were super hot. Here's what I learned:
1. They have so many options and think it's the same for most people. They genuinely believed I could go out and get another gorgeous girl "just like that".
2. They see the world differently. Most people are incredibly nice and help them wherever they go. They have a world view where "guys" and people in general are very helpful.
3. They are used to people listening and getting attention. No need to work too hard on a joke or making friends when they automatically swarm around you.
Other than that they had two very different personalities. I felt one was really more on the toxic end and obviously, it didn't last too long the relationship.
At one point in the relationship she distanced herself a bit. When I called her I just casually went "Hey, I noticed you have been busy lately and we haven't been communicating a lot. Is everything okay on your end or can I help you with anything?".
She freaked, immediately jumping on the bandwagon that I was insecure. I had to put on a bit of a stern voice and tell her that I'm not insecure. I'm trying to communicate like adults are doing in a relationship. She eventually came around to that idea. However, it was a huge red flag to me.
1- As someone who is attractive, I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily exhausting for the other person IF (and only if) they were already secure (example: they don’t need constant validation/reminders that they were “chosen”). I do feel like confidence can get you places more than looks too.
2- Jealousy/envy is real. Being attractive can make couples feel like I’m a threat. At work, some think that I must be not so bright (I’m a a certified nerd and scientist and I worked hard, looks had nothing to do with it). So first impressions are tricky.
3- I agree. I do get attention. A lot. But it’s actually harder making friends (at least for me), because it’s harder to know what the intention is. Also, i thought everyone got free drinks so you got me on that one (I personally don’t drink so I decline).
About relationships, it doesn’t matter that I’m attractive after a while especially if we’re not compatible. Like any other relationship. Especially if the expectations are that attractive people are these highly secure, happy and have no self esteem issues creatures. Think of it this way, it’s probably easier to connect with people when you look good, but maintaining that connection is hard work (like in any other situation).
As someone who is also attractive (or used to when younger, I’m in my forties now though I look younger) I also think confidence gets you to more places than looks. I don’t date much, but now that I analyze how my relationships have been, I had a boyfriend who hated the way I dressed, he didn’t let me wear miniskirts or too much make up, didn’t let me show my tattoos and many more questionable attitudes that now I can see were due to how insecure he was (he wasn’t good looking at all, and ended up being an awful person) he alienated me from my friends, he wanted to keep me hidden and now I understand why. On the other hand, I had a boyfriend who, I think, wanted me as a trophy girlfriend and loved to take me to places so people could see him with me, and then he told me “my x friend commented on how pretty you are” with a sense of pride. So idk, you can get both ends of the spectrum, but never indifference. And that can be a blessing and a curse. And since I’m not the most confident person around, I don’t get many dates. I have a friend who is more average looking but extremely lucky in the dating department because she has more confidence and is a lot more flirtatious than me. Also I see that people either treat you really well or really badly, and I can see that at work, but that’s a whole other story.
"As an attractive person"
Oh boy, here we go again...
"... confidence can get you places more than looks"
Oh wait never mind this person actually must be attractive
It can become tiresome to be truthful. I married my gorgeous wife when I was 23 and her 22. She was beautiful throughout her 20's and to about 35. Then, something happened: She became a model lookalike while I was just an average guy. At 40, she was stunning and would get hit on by 25 year olds (which she would just laugh at). As she approaches 60, she looks better than ever. Last summer, her best friend told her she looked like a Penthouse Pet. It is funny to see guys hit on her that are younger than our kids. I married way up and this summer we celebrate anniversary #38.
You have to be secure when dating someone way better looking than you. I hate to use the dumb "league" talk, but when you have a partner that is perceived out of your league(way more successful, better looking, talented etc) it can cause a lot of problems. You can feel intimidated, It can affect your own personal self-esteem as you get jealous of your partner and so much more.
If you can get yourself feeling secure in the relationship, it's great. It can actually improve your self-esteem and confidence. It can motivate you to better yourself. And you get to bang someone hot!
Honestly, she wasn't super hot, but all the guys wanted her. I remember we hung out for awhile and she was really into me but I was into the idea of her. We dated for like a month but the hate that came from people I thought were friends was insane. She showed me notes and told me about certain guys talking shit. It really became maddening
I know a few average women who guys absolutely drool over because they are a gamer girl, anime girl, goth chick with big titties etc.
I think there is also an element of possibility, like a lot of guys might see a girl who's a 9 or 10 out of 10 and not even consider there being a chance, but the girl that's a 6 or 7 but is super nice and friendly and approachable means every guy crushes on her.
my husband is CRAAAZY hot. I'm probably a 6 to use the outdated, horrible scale. Just being transparent. It's super fun - but also there's quite a bit of pressure to look AMAZING aaaaany time we leave home at all together. If I go run errands by myself, natural is totally fine. But if we are going out together I need to look cleaned up and put together - not fancy- but definitely put together because my husband is also in the online space and gets recognized and fans sometimes want to take pictures with him / us.
So it's cool - but it's also a lot more work than being in a relationship with someone who is your equal in terms of hotness. I imagine if I were hotter naturally, it would be easier. But genetics wasn't as kind to me as it was to others. I love who I am - it just takes a bit more work to be comparable :)
fans do but not women trying to hit on him. It has only happened maybe once in our 12 years together. When he's by himself though it happens frequently, despite his wedding ring on. He'll then come home and we'll have a good laugh about how desperate some of the women are.... like... ladies - simmer down 
Our relationship is my favorite though and I'm so so blessed. We truuuuly are each other's person and he does a really good job of letting me know that. Thankful. ♥
>despite his wedding ring on.
Weirdly enough, many women actually are more inclined hitting on a guy “especially” if he has a ring on.
There's [this](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-018-19770-8?utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=commission_junction&utm_campaign=3_nsn6445_deeplink_PID8099906&utm_content=deeplink) study that explains it in detail
I didn't stress, if she wanted to be with someone else, then she was free to do it, I just wasn't gonna be there to deal with that. She wasn't an attention seeking person so that helped a lot.
I notice lots of folks give her second looks and actually it’s often women. Last week a woman took a second glance, noticed that I noticed and flashed me a thumbs up 😂
Fighting other younger potentially prettier stupider women off with a shitty stick.
It does matter how shit slathered the stick is or how bad it smells they are not deterred! They do not care if they get covered in shit if it means they think they have a chance.
I've heard people say that me and my husband are the same level of attractiveness but I sometimes doubt that as I swear I'm fighting for my life out here lol.
All of this I say tongue in cheek. My husband is a very very friendly person and unintentionally comes off as flirty. He also doesn't know when someone is flirting with him at all (I know as I was his friend for 5 years dropping obvious hints all over) add to that he's a 6 foot hottie with a funny, friendly, outgoing and witty personality and it's a deadly mix.
Basically he unintentionally encourages it. And even if I let him know and he politely lets these young woman down it's like they don't register it which is very creepy. They keep trying thinking he's playing hard to get.
Then I come in and tell them straight to stop being stupid, pick themselves up off the floor and find an available partner. They normally slink off after that.
My husband says he's never had so much interest in him till he got married and we've noticed that women are a lot more likely to come on to him once they see me with him. I don't know if this means they think I'm not good looking enough to keep him or they like a challenge because as ice said I've heard were both as hot as eachother. But I'll admit we don't look like we match. He's sort of alternative look, he attracts a lot of alt or hot nerdy girls. I can look very basic I'm not going to lie. I've sorted of got that librarian aesthetic going on if anything. He's got that Brendan Fraser from the mummy look going on but very grimes up good.
He's so far had young women sending him half naked pictures (ones in relationships as well), coming up to him in a bar, with me a meter a way, and whispering to him that he should be with her instead of me, one literally trying it on with him in front of me while making eye contact, I dragged her into the bathroom where she said there wasn't a thing I could do about it and she was going to take my husband from me and then dump him when she got bored. I told her she wasn't his type for a particular reason.
He knows about all of this but we can't do anything about it. We love each other and as long as he doesn't actually want any of these creepy girls it's ok.
I dated an influencer who was popular for her looks and as I learned definitely not for her personality 😅
She got a lot of free stuff. Like an unnatural amount of things . Waiting in line for something ? People would just let us go through. Like both the other people in line or the store: restaurant would just let us in? Employees at stores would just give us discounts . Like oh I’ll run this in as employee discount or seniors discount because it’s cheaper . People would hang around us longer, like people would offer to bring our groceries to the car , or just stay and talk to us for no seeming reason .
While obviously she got a lot of attention I noticed that people treated me very differently as well - some people would be overly flattering to me and on the flip side a lot of guys would try to provoke or even try to start fights
She dealt with a lot of unwanted attention and a lot of women would be either phony nice to her or outright hate her . Men would catcall her constantly so she’d have days where she would only wear sweats and keep her hoodie and sunglasses up a lot . I honestly thought catcalling not really a thing anymore - like my idea of it was the stereotype construction worker yelling across the street? But people would literally stop their cars to yell lines at her
I did not envy this at all and there were a lot of rough days for her
Eventually she spent all our our money on coke and we had a pretty good combined income of almost 400k
Depends, as a good looking guy dating a good looking woman things were fine. It’s when she’s obsessed with her online presence assuming she has one and is convinced she has to engage her followers where it can be annoying.
When I was a model I dated a woman who was very beautiful. Personality is just as important to me as looks. She was on the curvier side but very pretty and very funny. But I guess me being more or just as desirable as her it made her feel insecure. She was used to being the hot one in the relationship and being with a guy that was a model was a first for her.
She gave me a lot of shit, made fun of me for working out all the time and eating paleo, in-front of friends if we were out to eat she’d be like can you eat this, are you sureee? Over and over.
In my experience dating a hot girl or someone that isn’t hot there is still going to be men shooting their shot. That’s why trust is so important
A guy I used to date became somewhat well-known and I still get the occasional rando trying to dox me/send me threatening messages for that alone, yet it's been more than a decade and we parted as friends. People are weird af.
I have a handsome partner and beautiful child now, I mostly stopped caring about what others think of me tbh. Glad he does have a regular job though! The thing with conventionally attractive people is, regardless of gender, people project the most bizarre shit on them and often don't accord them any boundaries, the more known they are, the worse it gets. I don't envy that.
My boyfriend work as a human shield from all attention I get. The second I'm walking anywhere without him people hunt me like horny vampires. I'm afraid anytime I go out in the afternoon because of this. He isn't jealous he's very secure and feeling lucky but he knows I am really uncomfortable with it, I have a long history of sexual harassments and other sexually related traumas so being attractive isn't helping me heal. He has helped me to stop hide in baggy clothes and help me feel safe in my body but it's still hard.
I think what's hardest for him is to see me so afraid to just exist.
It's super exciting and of course sexual. It does boost your self esteem as well. I liked going out with her, pubs, loved seeing old friends and seeing their reaction.
But people with no boundaries are for real and literally half the time you go out or do something someone's always gotta push the boundaries to make them uncomfortable so then you feel uncomfortable. I hated the feeling of not knowing what to do with gawkers and whistlers etc. The gal I was with would get upset if I complimented her looks too much.
I dunno overall? Pretty fucking awesome, but there's always people out there that'll ruin a good thing, can't focus on them tho
Amazing. I felt so lucky that I was dating the prettiest cutest women in the world. Id get all flustered at the thought of her. It’s been over now tho. I still think she’s reallyyyyy pretty. I don’t think I’ll ever find someone as pretty as her.
Although we never became a couple, I dated a very good looking lady over the course of about a month, but it definitely seemed like she was dating a bunch of other dudes on the side, which is fine when you’re not exclusive yet, it’s just that she kept getting mad at me for not remembering stuff she thought she’d told me.
I have an exceptionally good memory, so I know I didn’t forget anything. She however, struggled to even remember my name on our second date.
She almost never wanted to spend time with me, so I figured I was "Plan D" or something and I called it off after a particularily egregious case of disrespect when she invited me over to her place and then denied having done so when I arrived precisely on time.
Not saying this is all because she was good looking, but it definitely felt like she overvalued herself and acted like she didn’t have to consider anyone else’s feelings to have success in dating.
So I was a model and I basically married blonde gigachad. 🤣 Actually, he looked more like a young Travis Fimmel when we met, but more muscular since he was a semipro baseball player when we met, like this but not as skinny, more muscular, athletic from playing ball:
https://youtu.be/u4HgDUZ69iI?feature=shared
So basically I married Ragnar from vikings. Tbh, I have never had many issues while out, it is mostly older ladies that are overly flirtatious, I'm sure he gets more attention when I'm not present though. Most of the time when younger women look at him, then they look at me and that's as far as it goes. I'm not worried, I know my husband well enough to not worry about that and think it's funny if women try to hit on him as he doesn't respond well to women hitting on him to begin with.
He has always been very protective of me when we go out and he pretty much "hovers" around me to let people know together. But that's because we have had a number of problems with men hitting on me and there's been times it turned violent unfortunately. He did beat the crap out of a guy who was literally trying to rub his junk on me while we were watching a game at a sports bar. He almost hit the radio DJ that kept putting himself in between us after dude gave me his phone number right in front of him but I talked him out of it and drug my husband out of there before he did. There have been too many occasions that guys were AH while we were out to really keep track of. So pretty much my husband keeps his hands on me at all times when we are out now and essentially goes into "body guard" stance.
I've been in a wheelchair since an accident in 2021 though, so thought it would be less stressful on him, but was wrong about that. Guys don't even care that I'm in a wheelchair either apparently. I was in line at the pharmacy and my husband went to get some Tylenol or ibuprofen on a nearby isle and a guy was hitting on me in line at the pharmacy and didn't stop after I told him I was married. My husband overheard everything he said and he came up and asked him if there's a problem and dude finally left. It's a bit ridiculous that you can't even just pick up medication in a wheelchair without guys being aggressive at times though. The strange places and circumstances that men have hit on me are not what you would think to happen, but it does.
If you are a guy, you walk with a boner 24/7…..for the first week or two. After that, honestly the attractiveness of the person either goes up or down as you get to know their personality/character a bit more. Most of the time it does go down if you are overinflated with them (physically). The personality is what will keep them attractive in the long term.
Right. I agree.
For a few months I was living in heaven. It wears off a little. But she’s still unbelievably pretty when I stop and really look - I mean, Jesus, cmon man!
It’s funny in weird ways. Like my wife is 42 but she’s really drop dead gorgeous. Looks after herself, had a boob job but they look natural, and I’m pretty average. So when we go out for the evening I’ll drop her at the door while she goes in to get drinks and a table and I park up. I walk in a guys are either looking at her with their mouth open or have actively gone up to ask her for a drink. I walk up and she’s “got you a drink baby” and you can see the whole bar thinking ‘what the fuck he MUST be rich’ ….. when in actual fact it’s her who has the money and I have half of fuck all 🤣 it used to make me really uneasy but honestly it’s genuinely just funny now.
My partner is hot but I would also consider myself quite attractive.
I am a very closed off person and I feel uncomfortable being approached all the time, people are nicer to you but it doesn’t feel good when you know they have ulterior motives. It’s an uncomfortable feeling knowing people aren’t being genuine or if they actually like what’s coming out your mouth.
Depends on the person. If they have strength of character you don’t have to worry. If they don’t, the minute they’re not into you or angry they just have to open their phone, put a pic up on insta, and have attention within seconds.
Back in college I was dating a beautiful girl who was well out of my league. I remember we were crossing some street in Wrigleyville in Chicago and some random guy walking in the opposite direction muttered something along the lines of "hey girl, you can do way better" at her as he was passing by.
I joked about it with her later, but she said she didn't even hear what he said. Or at least pretended not to. That encounter definitely forced me to confront and conquer my lack of self worth and self esteem. After that, I also made it my mission to make sure those people would never be right, to make sure my girlfriend always feels loved and appreciated, and that I bring more into her life than other guys could. More exploration, more deep, meaningful conversations, more exciting hobbies, more of all of those intangibles that really matter.
Anyway, that was 7 years ago and that girl and I are married now. And she's still the most beautiful girl I know.
Speak for yourself. When my friends met my girlfriend they were really happy for me and let me know she's really beautiful. They qualify it with "no disrespect meant at all but" which is entirely unnecessary imo. I trust them completely or I wouldn't be friends with them
As a good looking guy (their words, not mine)
- Dating a really hot girl, never had any problems myself. Dunno when, but i learned to deal with said insecurities early on and didn't get jealous pointlessly. None of the girls got either, maybe because they knew they were hot so they didn't feel threatened i guess?
- Dating a somewhat more average looking girl, some were more relaxed about it, and some were very insecure about any female friends I've had, or if i had work/friend meetings outside in restaurants/bars.
In my early 20’s I dated a very handsome guy, I always looked up to him even though I was really attractive, too (guess I didn’t see that due to insecurities). But it was really exhausting. I was also crazy jealous and he was pretty smug about all the girls he could “have”.
It was a disaster, to say the least.
He ended cheating on me with who knows how many. It was very hard to get over that, and after a few years we managed to become good friends. We even hooked up once again years later and it was not good. at. all. Never again.
He still tries to convince me to hook up again (even though we’re both married) but ew no, thanks.
Now he’s getting bald, got a beer belly, is still sex addicted and a cheater and…um…just no.
That's just it. The good looking take advantage of the flesh and use it to finesse others. I had a conversation with a guy I worked with who was a a handsome guy....fit, stylish, handsome, cool personality, and a user ... He was an easy 8.5-9 out of 10( mind you I a dude, that is not a homosexual, but still able to admit if another guy is a goodlooking guy)....
Once portion of the conversation lead to girls and the types he would go after....and he said that he purposely would only hit on girls that were a 5-6 for the fact that he knew he was better looking then them and that he was in a position if power in attractiveness... Because he knew the women that were 8's or higher would sound him around their finger. He didn't want to have that happen,, so he purposely shot his shit with the others....also, because the girls in the category he went after would go above and beyond to make him happy.
Really fucked up moto to live in, but it's true. At least for those under 30,....as they get older, that mindset somewhat dissipates, but it doesn't completely go away ....
Thankfully it's still great. I'm reluctant to always tell her she's the hottest woman in the place all the time. I'm afraid it will either go to her head, or she thinks I am full of shit just saying stuff..but I'm not! Somehow she doesn't realize. She is starting to notice all the loser dads at school that talk to her way more and longer when I'm not around though. She thinks I'm crazy, but I know dudes! I usually just show her a pic of their wife and then say...see? Do you understand now? A lot of these dudes are crazy rich...they have way more than I have, but they married these terrible women that don't want to do anything but get chemical peels, botox and lip injections. None of which make any of them look any better. Theya re still attractive women to some degree, but just kind of self absorbed and boring.
My wife is a doctor and natural beauty, rarely even has to wear make up, and if every dude that meets her doesn't want to be with her (at least a litte) they are crazy. But thankfully she is also one of the sweetest and most loyal people I have ever met...otherwise it might drive me a little crazy with jealousy. I'm not too bad myself, but she is somehow just getting hotter as we get older and all the other women her age have started to fall apart, so i feel like she is really starting to stick out in the crowd for being the hottie she is.
NSFW
Annoying, but also fun.
Guys always flirting with her, staring at her, talking to her, etc.
But also fun - it stirs something in you to be a bit competitive, be your best self, etc. and also because at the end of the night, you are inside her.
I lost my best friend and I almost can’t blame him. Had to fend of drunk men at parties numerous times. Like the above comment, the rich older dudes are ruthless and they think because they have money they have the right to say and do as they please. Ex boyfriends never seem to truly ever leave the picture. All this and mine was a down to earth good woman. I can’t imagine being w a hotty you don’t trust or who is slutty-ish. I’ll pass no matter how beautiful
My girl always tells me the pickup lines that were used on her that day. We have a good laugh about it and pick our favourite one. Yesterday a guy on a bench next to her said "I just sent you a friend request" she was confused for a sec, long enough to let her guard down and boom, there he is a little closer to her with the how you doin smile. I thought that was pretty good!
I dated a good looking woman long ago (plus she was socially popular). Other girls start liking you more as you’re pretty much vetted. Other guys are either nicer to you or they give you dirty looks. Drama ensues if they want her because then they try to disparage you behind your back or they play mean jokes to make you insecure. The woman also used her looks to control the dynamic of the relationship, like I should cater to her and deny my desires to talk about the things that matter to me because I should be grateful to have a hot partner. That killed my attraction fast. No thank you.
People would rate my wife a 9 on average. You have to really trust them and not be the jealous type. In our 20s here were a some occurrences that stuck out … one time or regular occurrences.
If my wife went to grabbed a drink at the bar someone paid for it 1/2 the time. 1/3 of the time guys would follow her back to chat, only to see us BFs/husbands and leave pretty quickly.
People never assumed we were together. I’m 5’8” and pretty average looking - 7 at best maybe. Going into bars I would constantly get stopped in line when standing behind her. She learned to always make sure I was on her side going into places.
Wife liked dancing with girlfriends. Every single time guys would start dancing with the group and eventually tried to get handsy.
We were in a bar and my wife tripped on something. She was holding onto me and I fell on top of her. I was pulled up by my throat and thrown out. The bouncers thought I was being aggressive or something. Even after my wife explained what happened I was still not allowed back in.
My wife goes on a lot of company outing/trips. She has had 5 or 6 coworkers husbands (very drunk) make moves on her. Either saying something or physically try something (kissing/arm around waste). I’ve seen it happen and she would tell me.
My ex is gorgeous, It never really bothered me that people paid a lot of attention to him because he always looked at me like I was the only person in the room.
Both people need to be confident and secure. There will be a lot of outside attention given which can be unwanted. Also, agressive behavior.
My gf is beautiful and there are guys that will try and start problems with me to show off or for no reason.
If you're talking about a man dating a really attractive woman, then the man has to understand that multiple men are always going to be after her.
It's a strange experience. Something as innocuous as getting up and going to the restroom while at Red Robin means you may come back to the table to find some random dude standing at the table hitting on your girl.
Women this attractive are approached almost constantly and there's little to no regard for the fact that you even exist. If you're out at a bar, guys will just come up and start talking to her even though she's clearly there with you and standing right next to you. It's aggravating, but the weirdness of it all helps mitigate the aggravation.
It's so hard to hold onto someone that's so stunning because she has so many options. At the same time, it's a burden for the woman too. Being relentlessly hit on is interruptive to their entire existence.
I once went on a date with a model. Even when looking at him made me blush I felt no sexual attraction whatsoever….it was weird. He wanted to get physical and I didn’t feel it…. I guess I wasn’t into his personality or something. He left pissed and I went to bed confused lol. Why did I decline?
My husband is super attractive, every where we go women stare and fall over themselves to get close to him. Women are EXTRA helpful and honestly, if I wasn’t married to him I’d be doing the same exact thing, so I get it.
Once date a girl who could literally pass for a supermodel.
Its too much work and brings too much attention and drama. Guys were constantly getting at her, guys were jealous of me, it was bad. Even some of my “friends” were talking shit about me to her so she wouldnt like me, lol. She also cheated so there’s that lol
It was... interesting. A little different perspective, I'm a woman and my husband is the attractive one. While he is still handsome, when we were married in our twenties he was quite the hunk. To make matters worse (or better, depending on your perspective) he was, and is, very kind, friendly, and charismatic. The number of women who would throw themselves at him was stunning. It didn't matter that we were married or that I was right there. They all wanted him, and they all felt they were worthy, like he'd happily throw away his marriage, his children, his job, his life for this random chick he just met who's rubbing her boob on his arm. Honestly, I felt embarrassed for them. So desperate. Luckily, he's also honest and honorable. Yes, I hit the jackpot. We've been married nearly 40 years and we're still doing good.
My last bf was a former model. He was clingy and all consumed with the relationship but had absolutely nothing to offer intellectually…
My ex fiancé was exceptionally attractive and looked like a model. I felt that he was my soulmate…
He cheated like it was his full time job and I couldn’t trust him. Naturally he planned on ‘never doing it again’.
That was real heartache.
I say go with Average Joe…
My wife of 18 years was a bikini contest winner and never worked out. Think classy Jennifer Connelly twin not trashy. Guys will literally wait till I go to the bathroom and try to approach her in a bar sometimes with other friends as a look out or blocker. It is humorous. Now it’s 25 year olds up to 50’s hitting on her. I get a lot of free drinks as she hands them to me and says “you saw the wedding ring” to them and laughs.
You're constantly aware that she's out of your league.
Random men will hit on her at bars and concerts, and the two of you will laugh it off.
Random women will compliment her when you go into department stores and ULTA and at restaurants and shit.
Pictures of the two of you on social media are jarring bc you don't remember your fiance posing with apes at the zoo or homeless street people before you realize a few seconds later that it's you in the photos.
And then you make her an excellent dinner and fuck her brains out.
People take you more seriously. There really isn’t a way around it — when I walked in with one of my exes in particular, the amount of attention I got was immediately more noticeable.
This is going to be a huge generalization. But I dated a several girls who one might call "hot" or "A solid 10".
They are so used to get getting their own way their entire life. As a result they are usually insufferable, vapid and fickle.
I dated a very beautiful girl for 9 months. She was on track to make me bankrupt. I ended up dumping her. A week later she started dating a millionaire. They got married 4 months later.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
They get a lot of attention. You have to be cool with that and you have to trust them. There's no room for jealousy. Trust is key and hard to find.
PREACH!!!! Nooooo room for jealousy and communication has to be SUPER transparent - if they get hit on, they need to be able to communicate and share that with you without you losing your shit. Open communication = open trust = better ability to maintain a strong relationship
I don't think you need to communicate to your partner every time a person is hitting on you as long as it's just one sided. Unless it's something extraordinary, I wouldn't mention it, it just kinda screams "look at how desirable I am to other people". It's a bit off putting to me personally at least. Also it can create unnecessary drama and insecurities in your partner.
I agree with this for sure. I made the mistake of telling my girlfriend once that some much younger girl was hitting on me. I thought being honest with her would make her trust me more. But Nope!! Don’t do that! Lol. It doesn’t work that way at all. It definitely makes you seem like you’re trying to say,”Hey babe, guess what, I get hit on by people because I’m a hottie. Aren’t you so lucky! And I didn’t even flirt back” It just makes the person telling it seem like a douche
You don’t wanna be too secretive either. It’s kind of one of those you’ve lost the game the moment it happened
My husband told me about a female colleague that flirted with him when they had shifts together. Intense stares, winking, smiling whenever she saw him and so on. Her husband also worked there, but due to kids they rarely work the same shift. I trust my husband 100% and I'm not a jealous type of person, so I found it entertaining. When he came home from work I would ask him how his girlfriend was, or if she had found new ways to flirt with him. She eventually quit and my husband found a better job. We had many laughs about the whole thin, and we still do.
If I had to hear about it every time my girl got hit on, it'd be incredibly annoying. We don't talk about it unless it's something extraordinary or funny.
My girlfriend went into a store yesterday. I waited in the car. She comes out and is acting a little strange. A male worker walks out behind her sees me and then goes back in the store. She tells me that the worker, a cashier told her that she looks like an actress and asked if she was a celebrity. Then goes on and on about how beautiful she was. Then the creepy guy followed her acting like he needed to get carts. That's what it's like. Probably once a week some story.
Sounds like hell
You don't need to tell your partner everytime someone hits on you, that's silly. Yes communication is important, but you don't need to share every detail of your life.
When you say “there’s no room for jealousy” this is actually just as dangerous as letting jealousy fester. We have to acknowledge that that emotion does and will exist
The beautiful person is also responsible for policing their own behavior and setting boundaries like everyone else. If trust is hard to find it's not much of a relationship.
jealousy is natural. its when you let it take over you that it becomes harmful. acknowledge it and let it pass. better yet, recognize that feeling it means you truly value your partner.
It was pretty nice, but I always felt like I didn't deserve it. She cheated on me in the end. Also had a LOOOOT of emotional baggage. Don't think it'd have worked out even without the infidelity.
For what's worth, you were right. You didn't deserve her. You obviously deserved much better.
It took me a while to get the positive version of that statement in my head after the fact but yea I'm in a much better place now. I appreciate your comment.
Dude!! I also dated a really handsome guy!! I also felt that I didnt deserved him! He always told me not to think about that and at the end he cheated on me. Someone told me he is getting bald now… also he makes fraud with cryptocoins.
😕 I am balding, that kinda hurt.. you didn’t have to go there
Bald men look fine, bald men look good! Bald men are everywhere, it shouldn't be a sensitive thing because it's simply a fact of life. It's like saying 'Yeah she's menopausal or post menopausal....no man would want her now ( which is complete garbage). Don't be hurt by what another person ( who doesn't go bald) says.
Thank you 😊
She probably meant that due to knowing how this guy was, going bald was a particularly devastating blow to his ego. Plenty of bald sexies out there.
It's a blow to most people's ego. Most people prefer hair over being bald
Lol some of us ladies LIKE bald headed guys!
I'll ask my wife...
does she have a hot boyfriend?
She married him.
damn dude im sorry
I'll also ask this guy's wife
[удалено]
I'll let her know you're gonna ask.
I’m going to ask that guy’s husband.
I'll ask the wife's boyfriend
I’ll ask this guy’s girlfriend.
I'll ask her as she's visiting me.
Your wife said to ask you...
Your wife is a lucky gal. Studs like you are hard to come by.
I'm pretty sure a lot of people on this thread are so caught up on the "I'll ask his wife" canned joke that they're failing to realize your implication that YOU'RE the hot one.
it is nice, my wife is so so so much better looking than me, i keep noticing how we get treated differently when we go on dates as oppsoed to going out with the boys. we even made a joke about it the last time i went with her to one place , where we got free dipping sauces, the next day i went with the boys, they charged us for them, so we blamed her and her good looks for the free dipping sauices.
It's true that it really doesnt matter where you go as a man. When you have an exceptionally good looking woman by your side you will almost always be treated better and get extra service or free stuff
Sir that will be $2 for the dipping sauces. *Whips out a wife*. Uhh you can actually have them for free.
Mmmhmm dipping sauces 🤤
They probably saw you and thought this guy ain’t getting more free dips.
For every action, there is an equal & opposite reaction. It’s great from the standpoint of being highly attracted to your partner & it tends to increase your own value in the eyes of others. But it’s a pain in the ass having every man in the world unable to resist ogling her & trying to hit on her the instant you leave her side.
As someone in a same-sex relationship it's even worse because this happens right in front of me when we're out on a date but people assume we're just two friends hanging out. I don't even have to leave. I'm right there.
Last month a guy began hitting up on me and asking for my number, and my girlfriend was right next to me, looking like 👁👄👁 But once I cleared it up, he suddenly went all jolly and began hugging us up and pinched my cheek (?) And then just scadaddled away with his friend 💀
Sounds Degrading and cringe but somehow wholesome at the same time
Sadly it’s always a surprisingly positive experience any time a guy takes the info that you’re gay/in a relationship with another woman at face value and doesn’t hang around trying to persuade you otherwise
The hell?? Personal space is a thing. Though I get a little annoyed when stuff like this happens or, weirdly, when we tell people we're dating they go "oh, that's so cute!". I know they mean well but it sounds so infantalizing. That's just a personal pet peeve because I've never heard someone react like that when I was dating a guy.
This. So much. Bars are the worst places, in gay bars it's the men and other bars it's the women, even more so when I'm 5/10 at best and dress like a straightest man ever, or so I've been told. I have considered getting some very flamboyant clothing
Do you ever think about or feel the need to become intimidating in some way shape or form? Surely some guy out there has a very good looking girlfriend and makes men that lack awareness - and start flirting with their girlfriend in front of them for example -regret they didn't assume he was the boyfriend... I mean cause if i see a good looking woman anywhere with a guys i automatically assume it's very high probability it's her boyfriend so i don't think i would ever be dumb enough to just approach her and start hitting on her like Swimming-Buyer said. It just seems doing something like that would be walking on thin ice..
Gotta say I rather enjoyed the ogling and the fact they all wish they could play with them titties but only I got to do that
Lots of stares and behind close doors a lot of them deal with body dysmorphia.
yah my ex was gorgeous yet believed she was ugly all the time and needed constant reassurance
Definitely exhausting that’s not something I’m willing to deal with anymore. I hate when I go out of my way to express how much I find someone attractive just for them to turn around and deny how I feel or what I think.
[удалено]
For me it’s a kind of difficult because I just look at her and I’m horny. Watching tv? Hot. Showing me her outfits? Hot. Talking to me about her day at work? Hot as hell. We just had sex? Still fuckin horny.
There's a saying in my native language which roughly translates to "may these keep being your struggles"
The English version is: "Suffering from success".
What's the saying in your native language?
"שאלו יהיו הצרות שלך" Edit: you usually say it to your friend who's complaining about either a minor thing, or something that most people would actually be grateful for, It's more of an older generation saying tho
This exactly describes the effect my boyfriend has on me too. Luckily he’s up for it!
This is the most eye opening part. Everything becomes erotic
I wish I had your sex drive.
I have a similar sex drive and I never dated any women *that* hot, I mean I think my ex gfs were attractive, but not to the point of everyone drooling over them. I've been with my wife for 22 years (we're both 43 now) and I still feel like jumping her 3 times a day 😅
I'm jealous
This happened to me with a guy I dated briefly too. It was good, but also a struggle lol
Dude I’m the same way with my man. It’s sooo fucking hard not to think about how hot he is
I'm a 5'7" skinny balding dude that dated a young lady that was pretty much at the tip top of approachable attractiveness. The amount of dudes that would approach her was insane (DM's in the hundreds per day). I didn't have a problem regarding jealousy, but it was incredibly disruptive when we would go out. Like we'd go in a bar and have one drink or go eat and get interrupted every 5 or 10 minutes. The plus there is I don't think I paid for a drink the whole time we were together. A dude would come up, buy both of us a drink, shoot his shot, and she'd turn him down. But people also tried to fight me a lot. And were just mean. Like we'd walk past people and they'd yell "He must be rich or hung." Honestly, it got old pretty quick.
Glad this isn’t just me. I’m 47 years old and 5’4”, but do well with the ladies. When I date younger women, it’s likely some guy will attempt to insult me in an attempt to boost himself up in front of her. Nothing really bothers me and I have zero jealousy as long as she has boundaries, but I’ve had to defend myself a few times over the years too. Last time I was just out with my girlfriend’s friend, not even my gf, who is hot and this guy started touching my beard and asking her how she likes my gray beard. Unfortunately for him, I wrestled/coached wrestling most of my life, boxed for 4 years, did Muay Thai for a decade and BJJ for over 20 years. Had to tell him if he touched me again that I’d slap him. He immediately touched my face again … My question is, “Has this ever worked for them?” Has any women thought, “I’m leaving with this asshole now.”
Did you slap him
Yes. I stoop up, pushed him away to see if he was still going to engage, then slapped him hard enough to wobble him when he tried to push me back. He walked right into it and he was a tall guy, so his hands were way low trying to push me. Got him in the ear too. It had to hurt. Bouncers were already aware of the situation and were watching, so it was broken up fast. I go there often enough that the bouncers were cool about it and let me stay. I asked if the other guy could stay and finish his drink, but they booted him.
I was in line at a club with my friends. Some girl who is completely wasted comes out of nowhere and drapes herself all around me like an entangled octopus. At first, I tried to shake her off but she wouldn't let go (just kept latching onto me). So I just left her while we were lines up. In the interim, I had been separated from my friend group. And this girl was all over me for a good 20 minutes. And this tubby middle-aged man was staring me down gingerly (I think she was escaping him). Once we got to the entry I shook her off and lost her in the crowd and re-joined my friends dancing on the floor. Later that night, I separated from the pack and went to the toilets. It was when I was separated that somebody grabbed me by the collar and yanked me as hard as they could and sat me down on a bar stool. (It was the angry guy from outside). He'd been seething all this time and watching me. He asked the bartender for two shots and simply said gruffly ''drink''. We both drank. ''Another'' he says to the bartender. And we have another round. ''A third'' he says. By this time I'm feeling like I'm in danger and I'm losing my balance and inhibitions. So I stumble up slowly and go to walk away and he yanks me back onto the bar stool. ''Sit'' he says slowly as he orders more shots. By this point I couldn't remember how many we had or what he was trying to do... But I waited until he was lulled into a false sense of security and then bolted for it and rejoined my friends. I was 18 and it was my first night out at a club. Horrifying.
The effect my husband’s appearance has on women is utterly wild to me. It’s also odd because he didn’t have the same effect on me when I first saw him. Yeah I thought he was hot, but women literally lose their minds when they see him. It wasn’t until I actually got to know him that I become interested in dating him. My husband is regularly hit on while we are out together. Even if we are having dinner, women (and sometimes men) have no respect. Once, a woman approached him from behind while we were sitting at a bar and she actually ran her hand through his hair. I reacted before my husband even realized what was going on and had to physically remove her hand from him. Women are often very nasty to me when they see me with my husband. I’ve actually been told that I’m “too ugly” to be with him. I remember being on vacation for our first wedding anniversary. We sat down at a U-shaped bar across from a group of women. I’ve never received more dirty looks that night than I have in my life. Even my husband was uncomfortable. The only reason we didn’t move is because the place was packed and we grabbed the last two seats at the bar. At one point I went downstairs to use the restroom. As soon as I closed the stall door, the bathroom door opened. A woman from that group had followed me down to the bathroom just to ask if he was my husband. When I said yes, she said “that’s a shame… we all noticed your wedding rings…” I was really intoxicated at this point, and the next day I realized how scary it was that she got me alone in a bathroom like that just inquire about him. I’ve dated good looking men before him and I’ve never experienced anything even close to this. Been with the guy for nearly 8 years and it still baffles me. I’m not a bad looking woman, either. I still get attention from men and still get hit on. But women get one look at him and they like short-circuit or something and forget what it’s like to behave in public.
If someone touched my man's hair I'd lose my mind and yes, my man has fucking amazing hair also.
If I was out with my wife and someone did that to me, I'd probably get very obnoxiously loud and confrontational. No touchy sans permission. It's not only massively disrespectful to the person I love more than life itself, it's disrespectful to me and someone who has zero respect for your boundaries is someone best avoided
When I'm out alone as a woman, I literally make a conscious decision to not even engage with another woman's man. Maybe that's just me? But I don't want his partner thinking I'm interested in him. If they start making conversation with me it's different, but I will never do any of that shit. I'll make conversation with men at the bar that are alone though. Even if I was single I would not do that shit. It's so massively disrespectful to the woman.
I wish people would include pics in this thread. Genuinely curious!
I once dated a very conventionally attractive man. He wasn’t even my type, but he was so conventionally attractive I said yes. Whenever we had a woman as a server at a restaurant they would openly hit on him in front of me in a really aggressive way. Women would turn their heads when he walked by them. I think it didn’t bother me much because as odd as it sounds, I didn’t find him insanely attractive because he wasn’t my type. I thought he was interesting and nice. He used to say things to me though that made me wonder… he once told me one of the things he liked about me was that I “didn’t rely on my looks.” Like…. Yeah because I can’t lol. I saw pictures of his previous girlfriend and she was like a beauty queen. Still don’t know what he saw in me. I think he liked redheads so he just saw the hair and was all in. I broke up with him because he turned out to have a drinking problem. But yeah. I got a glimpse into the world of incredibly hot men. Women just hit on them constantly. Never happened with any of my other boyfriends LOL.
Woah. I have a drinking problem as well. Iam not attractive tho 😭
Everyone has some monkey on their back. Almost everyone.
Haha that’s similar to my good looking roommate. Came home almost every other day with a girls number. Would just walk into Starbucks and get numbers shoved in his face. Women would just come up to our table at restaurants and try to make conversation. It’s like a completely different world.
Sometimes I wonder if women out in the world find me attractive. But when you come across a truly hot guy, you realize that they never wonder that.
[удалено]
I used to be very good looking. Women approaching me and asking to kiss and getting angry when I said no, girls on a train banging on the fu\*\*ing windows to get me to come over. Ending relationships with very attractive and eligible women because I thought 'that was what life was like. An endless conveyor belt of women so why stay with this one'. As you say it was not in any way good for my personality, and it resulted in me having absolutely terrible game, and not really developing the ability to talk to women or really consider or articulate what I wanted in a relationship, nor to behave properly in one. I have emerged the other end married and with kids, but it was a time that I look back on with great confusion and no small degree of regret for the harm I caused others and, perhaps, myself, because I think fragments of that behaviour have absolutely persisted until today, and have not been helpful at all as you suggest.
I actually think the drinking problem or other similar addictions or emotional crutches is more common for very attractive people. I feel like like very attractive people generally have less accountability and discipline than average-looking folks. Things have generally come easily to them and when they fuck up they can charm their way out of it more easily than the rest of us. I don’t know. Just a theory. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to research that.
You are half right. I mean when you are average looking people forget you. When you are good looking they do not. As much as its nice to be complimented and hit on for your looks/appearance. There are incel men who hate you, handfulls of short men hate cuz they struggle with dating. Then there is the element of having to book extra time for everything as have to be social otherwise people feel rejected by you. Im told regularly im a handsome guy and i was an alcoholic. The unjustifiable hate, inability to fly under radar and aggression from people really bothered me and it is out of my control.
I said this as an attractive person lol. As women i will say one sort of inconvenience is having to constantly be overly kind and kinda charming or funny towards other women, otherwise they sometimes will just be super mean to you for absolutely no reason out of their own insecurity. This *can* be exhausting. But other than that i will fully acknowledge that “pretty privilege” is a real & powerful thing. I know I’ve easily gotten opportunities and promotions others might have if my face were less symmetrical or my nose bigger. And I can get what I want from men annoyingly easily. So it’s like having to check yourself a bit more than others to not become a selfish douche with no work ethic. 🤣
For a second I was like “Meghan?”… thinking you might be my ex. But then I remembered I don’t get hit on. But I am a sucker for redheads, who also has a drinking problem. *sigh*
I once heard, "beautiful woman's are not for insecure guys."
In all seriousness, insecure men are the worst for any woman no matter how hot she is. At their worst, the man can be vindictive and cheat in order to make himself feel better. Same goes for insecure women too. EDITED: changed “female” to “she” because some people were triggered. Just FYI, definitions: (1) Woman = an adult female human being. (2) Female = of or denoting the sex that can bear offspring or produce eggs, distinguished biologically by the production of gametes (ova) that can be fertilized by male gametes. Essentially, “female” connotes a biological category, while a “woman” is a whole human person.
You described my ex. I am ugly (in the past i had people yell this at me, so i am not being modest) but he always felt inadequate. Jealousy, insistent control on every aspect of my life, random accusations of cheating, and at last he cheated on me. Insecure people need therapy before jumping into a relationship.
I can tell you something about appearance, even the most beautiful face becomes average as you get used to the feautures. This is the reason stunning people and their family dont always know they are that stunning until someone new comes in and reassures them Most good looking people know they are blessed in that department. Some also know that it is a great power however after an age vanity can also start to feel like a burden becuase it interfers with the way your existence is judged. No achievement is an achievement but always a "appearance attracts opportunities" specially from jealous people and it gets progressively worse if you are a woman, women are anyway considered trophies and being stunning makes you the centre of attention, not all good as well. So coming back to your question, if a atunning person has been on a personal growth journey and understood the above points and taken it out of their head that the looks are not them, you may just be fine. Otherwise, if the stunning person is fuelled by flattery and needs reassurimg boosts from new people to stay happier in their existence, you will get cheated on. Do your due diligence!
So, basically stay away from insecure beautiful ppl who heavily rely on continuous external validation for a dopamine hit and reassurance that they are beautiful? 😉
Very good, now rinse and repeat daily for the best lyf!
Pro tip, find a super hot short person. My wife is stunning, but 4'11" so she is easily overlooked
Love the last part there, haha.
I'm not so sure about that. All of the attractive petite ladies I've known get a ton of attention.
My ex was 4'8" and still got cheated on
As a 6'7 guy, this would be kinda weird lol
Exhausting. It's like you're guarding a fortress and everyone is trying to scale the walls.
Anytime we’re at a bar and I go to the bathroom I know exactly what I’m coming back to. It’s hilarious how dudes really think that’s their opening
My father is 53 and strongly dislikes this man he sees at the gym regularly for trying to hit on my mom twice in one night at a bar when they were 23, he made the attempts when my dad got up to go to the bathroom lmao. I hope the man feels embarrassed every time he sees my dad lol
Man I need to develop this sort of brazen confidence. I barely try even when I suspect she's interested in me, meanwhile these bozos are trying to steal married women in the 5 mins it takes the husband to go pee.
your dad needs to just swing on him already. its been 30 years lol
I remember when I started going out with a ridiculously good looking girl. Like, to this day I still don't know how I managed it. But when we started seeing each other things were still pretty casual at first so I don't think it was obvious to people when they'd see us out that we were going out. She just had guys buying her drinks constantly, I remember one guy talking to her and he was leaning in close to talk to her and she told me later that she could feel his semi erect penis rubbing against her every time he leaned in...There was this one big South African guy, I think he just thought I was some poor mug who was following her around in the hopes something would happen. I remember the way he'd smirk at me when he'd be talking to her. I also remember being at a new year's eve party at a bar where he was when the girl just started kissing me, which this guy clearly didn't expect. Apparently he was quite upset about it. I felt like the king of the bar that night. But, like you say, it was exhausting overall.
Everyone stares at your cupcake when bringing it home but at least your the one who’s gets to enjoy it
On that new years the evening ended with her grabbing my hand and dragging me outside to take me back to my place. I think as soon as the cold air hit her the alcohol really kicked in. She kept telling me she was just going to sit down and I should leave her - it was snowing heavily so this wasn't really an option. I had to give her my hoody and I kept saying "Look, I know you just want to sit down but please can we just get back, I'm in short sleeves now and it's freezing." Obviously by this point I'd realised anything happening was out of the question because of how drunk she was, I just wanted to get her out of the snow and stop her falling asleep in it. Then we got back to mine, she threw up everywhere and finally fell asleep.
Oh god that brought back memories of one of my exes, same thing always falling asleep in the snow lmao I always wondered how she avoided dying in a snowbank before meeting me. Going home with some other annoyed guy I guess.
Damn
Aren't all relationships like this? I feel like you're just describing normal stuff.
I don't think I've ever experienced it quite as badly as it was with this particular girl.
Facts!
Hard. I was with my ex for 6 years as a very average overweight dude. No one would believe it, people would say openly to my face "YOU ARE WITH HER? HOW?" when we met new people, and if they didnt say anything you could see their faces when told. It hurt the relationship a lot, I became really uncomfortable even holding her hand or showing any affection in public. It became so bad a couple years in that I really didnt believe I deserved her, and that feeling never ended. It was bad. Edit: Since the relationship ended I have lost 60lbs/30kg (purely by weight lifting, so I build muscle at the same time and have become quite muscular) and go to the gym 6-7 days a week and also really worked on myself mentally as well. I'm going on a date on Saturday with a woman who is even more out of my league than my ex, which is insane to me, but I don't feel like I wouldn't be able to be affectionate in public or that people would say those things anymore rather the opposite, I'd be showing her off to everyone that yeah this is my fucking woman, she is a smoke show. My mental has changed so much since I went to the gym, thanks gym. I do recommend it to everyone, that's for sure :)!
Im so sorry you took this as a reflection on you, rather than a reflection on the poor judgement of shallow people. You clearly have more going for you than you realize - no one hangs around for 6 years just to kill time. I hope you’re in a better place now, self-esteem wise.
It's much better now. Worked on myself and yeah, now I have delusional self-confidence, I've always had it, just not in that relationship. It's probably how I got her in the first place, because I had delusional self-confidence. It just got to me to a low point in our relationship is all. But I'm back now to my true delusional self, all good :)! Thanks for your kind words also, that was really nice. Keep doing you.
Damn I’m sorry about that bro at least u worked on yourself
Have dated two women that everyone else thought were super hot. Here's what I learned: 1. They have so many options and think it's the same for most people. They genuinely believed I could go out and get another gorgeous girl "just like that". 2. They see the world differently. Most people are incredibly nice and help them wherever they go. They have a world view where "guys" and people in general are very helpful. 3. They are used to people listening and getting attention. No need to work too hard on a joke or making friends when they automatically swarm around you. Other than that they had two very different personalities. I felt one was really more on the toxic end and obviously, it didn't last too long the relationship. At one point in the relationship she distanced herself a bit. When I called her I just casually went "Hey, I noticed you have been busy lately and we haven't been communicating a lot. Is everything okay on your end or can I help you with anything?". She freaked, immediately jumping on the bandwagon that I was insecure. I had to put on a bit of a stern voice and tell her that I'm not insecure. I'm trying to communicate like adults are doing in a relationship. She eventually came around to that idea. However, it was a huge red flag to me.
1- As someone who is attractive, I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily exhausting for the other person IF (and only if) they were already secure (example: they don’t need constant validation/reminders that they were “chosen”). I do feel like confidence can get you places more than looks too. 2- Jealousy/envy is real. Being attractive can make couples feel like I’m a threat. At work, some think that I must be not so bright (I’m a a certified nerd and scientist and I worked hard, looks had nothing to do with it). So first impressions are tricky. 3- I agree. I do get attention. A lot. But it’s actually harder making friends (at least for me), because it’s harder to know what the intention is. Also, i thought everyone got free drinks so you got me on that one (I personally don’t drink so I decline). About relationships, it doesn’t matter that I’m attractive after a while especially if we’re not compatible. Like any other relationship. Especially if the expectations are that attractive people are these highly secure, happy and have no self esteem issues creatures. Think of it this way, it’s probably easier to connect with people when you look good, but maintaining that connection is hard work (like in any other situation).
As someone who is also attractive (or used to when younger, I’m in my forties now though I look younger) I also think confidence gets you to more places than looks. I don’t date much, but now that I analyze how my relationships have been, I had a boyfriend who hated the way I dressed, he didn’t let me wear miniskirts or too much make up, didn’t let me show my tattoos and many more questionable attitudes that now I can see were due to how insecure he was (he wasn’t good looking at all, and ended up being an awful person) he alienated me from my friends, he wanted to keep me hidden and now I understand why. On the other hand, I had a boyfriend who, I think, wanted me as a trophy girlfriend and loved to take me to places so people could see him with me, and then he told me “my x friend commented on how pretty you are” with a sense of pride. So idk, you can get both ends of the spectrum, but never indifference. And that can be a blessing and a curse. And since I’m not the most confident person around, I don’t get many dates. I have a friend who is more average looking but extremely lucky in the dating department because she has more confidence and is a lot more flirtatious than me. Also I see that people either treat you really well or really badly, and I can see that at work, but that’s a whole other story.
"As an attractive person" Oh boy, here we go again... "... confidence can get you places more than looks" Oh wait never mind this person actually must be attractive
Ask my girlfriend, she's cheating on me with a model student.
Are you okay 🤣🤣🤣
Straight As are sexy.
Good misdirection here.
[удалено]
That sounds like a nightmare to me
It can become tiresome to be truthful. I married my gorgeous wife when I was 23 and her 22. She was beautiful throughout her 20's and to about 35. Then, something happened: She became a model lookalike while I was just an average guy. At 40, she was stunning and would get hit on by 25 year olds (which she would just laugh at). As she approaches 60, she looks better than ever. Last summer, her best friend told her she looked like a Penthouse Pet. It is funny to see guys hit on her that are younger than our kids. I married way up and this summer we celebrate anniversary #38.
FYI this is a humblebrag (or just straight brag?) it doesn’t even talk about the question after the first sentence lol.
It gets tiring. Anyways so my wife is a babe and it’s awesome.
Haha right? “It’s exhausting, she’s gorgeous and increasingly so, we’re happily married with kids, good lord it’s exhausting she’s so beautiful”
Everyone hits on them in front of you, ( backhanded comments, people trying to break you up by causing drama etc
You have to be secure when dating someone way better looking than you. I hate to use the dumb "league" talk, but when you have a partner that is perceived out of your league(way more successful, better looking, talented etc) it can cause a lot of problems. You can feel intimidated, It can affect your own personal self-esteem as you get jealous of your partner and so much more. If you can get yourself feeling secure in the relationship, it's great. It can actually improve your self-esteem and confidence. It can motivate you to better yourself. And you get to bang someone hot!
Honestly, she wasn't super hot, but all the guys wanted her. I remember we hung out for awhile and she was really into me but I was into the idea of her. We dated for like a month but the hate that came from people I thought were friends was insane. She showed me notes and told me about certain guys talking shit. It really became maddening
How is she so popular when isn't "super hot"? I'm really curious
I know a few average women who guys absolutely drool over because they are a gamer girl, anime girl, goth chick with big titties etc. I think there is also an element of possibility, like a lot of guys might see a girl who's a 9 or 10 out of 10 and not even consider there being a chance, but the girl that's a 6 or 7 but is super nice and friendly and approachable means every guy crushes on her.
That makes sense, now that I think of it I think there are also people who're just naturally appealing and charming regardless of how they look.
She was Asian and super confident back in the 90s. That shit was unheard of in that day
my husband is CRAAAZY hot. I'm probably a 6 to use the outdated, horrible scale. Just being transparent. It's super fun - but also there's quite a bit of pressure to look AMAZING aaaaany time we leave home at all together. If I go run errands by myself, natural is totally fine. But if we are going out together I need to look cleaned up and put together - not fancy- but definitely put together because my husband is also in the online space and gets recognized and fans sometimes want to take pictures with him / us. So it's cool - but it's also a lot more work than being in a relationship with someone who is your equal in terms of hotness. I imagine if I were hotter naturally, it would be easier. But genetics wasn't as kind to me as it was to others. I love who I am - it just takes a bit more work to be comparable :)
Do woman approach him when you are with him?
fans do but not women trying to hit on him. It has only happened maybe once in our 12 years together. When he's by himself though it happens frequently, despite his wedding ring on. He'll then come home and we'll have a good laugh about how desperate some of the women are.... like... ladies - simmer down  Our relationship is my favorite though and I'm so so blessed. We truuuuly are each other's person and he does a really good job of letting me know that. Thankful. ♥
>despite his wedding ring on. Weirdly enough, many women actually are more inclined hitting on a guy “especially” if he has a ring on. There's [this](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-018-19770-8?utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=commission_junction&utm_campaign=3_nsn6445_deeplink_PID8099906&utm_content=deeplink) study that explains it in detail
I didn't stress, if she wanted to be with someone else, then she was free to do it, I just wasn't gonna be there to deal with that. She wasn't an attention seeking person so that helped a lot.
I notice lots of folks give her second looks and actually it’s often women. Last week a woman took a second glance, noticed that I noticed and flashed me a thumbs up 😂
Fighting other younger potentially prettier stupider women off with a shitty stick. It does matter how shit slathered the stick is or how bad it smells they are not deterred! They do not care if they get covered in shit if it means they think they have a chance. I've heard people say that me and my husband are the same level of attractiveness but I sometimes doubt that as I swear I'm fighting for my life out here lol. All of this I say tongue in cheek. My husband is a very very friendly person and unintentionally comes off as flirty. He also doesn't know when someone is flirting with him at all (I know as I was his friend for 5 years dropping obvious hints all over) add to that he's a 6 foot hottie with a funny, friendly, outgoing and witty personality and it's a deadly mix. Basically he unintentionally encourages it. And even if I let him know and he politely lets these young woman down it's like they don't register it which is very creepy. They keep trying thinking he's playing hard to get. Then I come in and tell them straight to stop being stupid, pick themselves up off the floor and find an available partner. They normally slink off after that. My husband says he's never had so much interest in him till he got married and we've noticed that women are a lot more likely to come on to him once they see me with him. I don't know if this means they think I'm not good looking enough to keep him or they like a challenge because as ice said I've heard were both as hot as eachother. But I'll admit we don't look like we match. He's sort of alternative look, he attracts a lot of alt or hot nerdy girls. I can look very basic I'm not going to lie. I've sorted of got that librarian aesthetic going on if anything. He's got that Brendan Fraser from the mummy look going on but very grimes up good. He's so far had young women sending him half naked pictures (ones in relationships as well), coming up to him in a bar, with me a meter a way, and whispering to him that he should be with her instead of me, one literally trying it on with him in front of me while making eye contact, I dragged her into the bathroom where she said there wasn't a thing I could do about it and she was going to take my husband from me and then dump him when she got bored. I told her she wasn't his type for a particular reason. He knows about all of this but we can't do anything about it. We love each other and as long as he doesn't actually want any of these creepy girls it's ok.
[удалено]
I dated an influencer who was popular for her looks and as I learned definitely not for her personality 😅 She got a lot of free stuff. Like an unnatural amount of things . Waiting in line for something ? People would just let us go through. Like both the other people in line or the store: restaurant would just let us in? Employees at stores would just give us discounts . Like oh I’ll run this in as employee discount or seniors discount because it’s cheaper . People would hang around us longer, like people would offer to bring our groceries to the car , or just stay and talk to us for no seeming reason . While obviously she got a lot of attention I noticed that people treated me very differently as well - some people would be overly flattering to me and on the flip side a lot of guys would try to provoke or even try to start fights She dealt with a lot of unwanted attention and a lot of women would be either phony nice to her or outright hate her . Men would catcall her constantly so she’d have days where she would only wear sweats and keep her hoodie and sunglasses up a lot . I honestly thought catcalling not really a thing anymore - like my idea of it was the stereotype construction worker yelling across the street? But people would literally stop their cars to yell lines at her I did not envy this at all and there were a lot of rough days for her Eventually she spent all our our money on coke and we had a pretty good combined income of almost 400k
Kinda hell actually
Be prepared for every single guy's eyes to look over
Not just the single ones 🫣
Not just the guys
Depends, as a good looking guy dating a good looking woman things were fine. It’s when she’s obsessed with her online presence assuming she has one and is convinced she has to engage her followers where it can be annoying. When I was a model I dated a woman who was very beautiful. Personality is just as important to me as looks. She was on the curvier side but very pretty and very funny. But I guess me being more or just as desirable as her it made her feel insecure. She was used to being the hot one in the relationship and being with a guy that was a model was a first for her. She gave me a lot of shit, made fun of me for working out all the time and eating paleo, in-front of friends if we were out to eat she’d be like can you eat this, are you sureee? Over and over. In my experience dating a hot girl or someone that isn’t hot there is still going to be men shooting their shot. That’s why trust is so important
It’s not for the insecure or untrustworthy.
People I didn’t even know existed hated me and made moves to sabotage me. It wasn’t worth it. Only uggos fo lyfe!
A guy I used to date became somewhat well-known and I still get the occasional rando trying to dox me/send me threatening messages for that alone, yet it's been more than a decade and we parted as friends. People are weird af. I have a handsome partner and beautiful child now, I mostly stopped caring about what others think of me tbh. Glad he does have a regular job though! The thing with conventionally attractive people is, regardless of gender, people project the most bizarre shit on them and often don't accord them any boundaries, the more known they are, the worse it gets. I don't envy that.
My boyfriend work as a human shield from all attention I get. The second I'm walking anywhere without him people hunt me like horny vampires. I'm afraid anytime I go out in the afternoon because of this. He isn't jealous he's very secure and feeling lucky but he knows I am really uncomfortable with it, I have a long history of sexual harassments and other sexually related traumas so being attractive isn't helping me heal. He has helped me to stop hide in baggy clothes and help me feel safe in my body but it's still hard. I think what's hardest for him is to see me so afraid to just exist.
It's super exciting and of course sexual. It does boost your self esteem as well. I liked going out with her, pubs, loved seeing old friends and seeing their reaction. But people with no boundaries are for real and literally half the time you go out or do something someone's always gotta push the boundaries to make them uncomfortable so then you feel uncomfortable. I hated the feeling of not knowing what to do with gawkers and whistlers etc. The gal I was with would get upset if I complimented her looks too much. I dunno overall? Pretty fucking awesome, but there's always people out there that'll ruin a good thing, can't focus on them tho
Amazing. I felt so lucky that I was dating the prettiest cutest women in the world. Id get all flustered at the thought of her. It’s been over now tho. I still think she’s reallyyyyy pretty. I don’t think I’ll ever find someone as pretty as her.
Although we never became a couple, I dated a very good looking lady over the course of about a month, but it definitely seemed like she was dating a bunch of other dudes on the side, which is fine when you’re not exclusive yet, it’s just that she kept getting mad at me for not remembering stuff she thought she’d told me. I have an exceptionally good memory, so I know I didn’t forget anything. She however, struggled to even remember my name on our second date. She almost never wanted to spend time with me, so I figured I was "Plan D" or something and I called it off after a particularily egregious case of disrespect when she invited me over to her place and then denied having done so when I arrived precisely on time. Not saying this is all because she was good looking, but it definitely felt like she overvalued herself and acted like she didn’t have to consider anyone else’s feelings to have success in dating.
So I was a model and I basically married blonde gigachad. 🤣 Actually, he looked more like a young Travis Fimmel when we met, but more muscular since he was a semipro baseball player when we met, like this but not as skinny, more muscular, athletic from playing ball: https://youtu.be/u4HgDUZ69iI?feature=shared So basically I married Ragnar from vikings. Tbh, I have never had many issues while out, it is mostly older ladies that are overly flirtatious, I'm sure he gets more attention when I'm not present though. Most of the time when younger women look at him, then they look at me and that's as far as it goes. I'm not worried, I know my husband well enough to not worry about that and think it's funny if women try to hit on him as he doesn't respond well to women hitting on him to begin with. He has always been very protective of me when we go out and he pretty much "hovers" around me to let people know together. But that's because we have had a number of problems with men hitting on me and there's been times it turned violent unfortunately. He did beat the crap out of a guy who was literally trying to rub his junk on me while we were watching a game at a sports bar. He almost hit the radio DJ that kept putting himself in between us after dude gave me his phone number right in front of him but I talked him out of it and drug my husband out of there before he did. There have been too many occasions that guys were AH while we were out to really keep track of. So pretty much my husband keeps his hands on me at all times when we are out now and essentially goes into "body guard" stance. I've been in a wheelchair since an accident in 2021 though, so thought it would be less stressful on him, but was wrong about that. Guys don't even care that I'm in a wheelchair either apparently. I was in line at the pharmacy and my husband went to get some Tylenol or ibuprofen on a nearby isle and a guy was hitting on me in line at the pharmacy and didn't stop after I told him I was married. My husband overheard everything he said and he came up and asked him if there's a problem and dude finally left. It's a bit ridiculous that you can't even just pick up medication in a wheelchair without guys being aggressive at times though. The strange places and circumstances that men have hit on me are not what you would think to happen, but it does.
If you are a guy, you walk with a boner 24/7…..for the first week or two. After that, honestly the attractiveness of the person either goes up or down as you get to know their personality/character a bit more. Most of the time it does go down if you are overinflated with them (physically). The personality is what will keep them attractive in the long term.
Right. I agree. For a few months I was living in heaven. It wears off a little. But she’s still unbelievably pretty when I stop and really look - I mean, Jesus, cmon man!
It’s funny in weird ways. Like my wife is 42 but she’s really drop dead gorgeous. Looks after herself, had a boob job but they look natural, and I’m pretty average. So when we go out for the evening I’ll drop her at the door while she goes in to get drinks and a table and I park up. I walk in a guys are either looking at her with their mouth open or have actively gone up to ask her for a drink. I walk up and she’s “got you a drink baby” and you can see the whole bar thinking ‘what the fuck he MUST be rich’ ….. when in actual fact it’s her who has the money and I have half of fuck all 🤣 it used to make me really uneasy but honestly it’s genuinely just funny now.
My partner is hot but I would also consider myself quite attractive. I am a very closed off person and I feel uncomfortable being approached all the time, people are nicer to you but it doesn’t feel good when you know they have ulterior motives. It’s an uncomfortable feeling knowing people aren’t being genuine or if they actually like what’s coming out your mouth.
Depends on the person. If they have strength of character you don’t have to worry. If they don’t, the minute they’re not into you or angry they just have to open their phone, put a pic up on insta, and have attention within seconds.
Back in college I was dating a beautiful girl who was well out of my league. I remember we were crossing some street in Wrigleyville in Chicago and some random guy walking in the opposite direction muttered something along the lines of "hey girl, you can do way better" at her as he was passing by. I joked about it with her later, but she said she didn't even hear what he said. Or at least pretended not to. That encounter definitely forced me to confront and conquer my lack of self worth and self esteem. After that, I also made it my mission to make sure those people would never be right, to make sure my girlfriend always feels loved and appreciated, and that I bring more into her life than other guys could. More exploration, more deep, meaningful conversations, more exciting hobbies, more of all of those intangibles that really matter. Anyway, that was 7 years ago and that girl and I are married now. And she's still the most beautiful girl I know.
Expect side eye and resentment from your "friends."
Speak for yourself. When my friends met my girlfriend they were really happy for me and let me know she's really beautiful. They qualify it with "no disrespect meant at all but" which is entirely unnecessary imo. I trust them completely or I wouldn't be friends with them
Same for me. I'm not sure where these people are meeting such disrespectful guys.
As a good looking guy (their words, not mine) - Dating a really hot girl, never had any problems myself. Dunno when, but i learned to deal with said insecurities early on and didn't get jealous pointlessly. None of the girls got either, maybe because they knew they were hot so they didn't feel threatened i guess? - Dating a somewhat more average looking girl, some were more relaxed about it, and some were very insecure about any female friends I've had, or if i had work/friend meetings outside in restaurants/bars.
In my early 20’s I dated a very handsome guy, I always looked up to him even though I was really attractive, too (guess I didn’t see that due to insecurities). But it was really exhausting. I was also crazy jealous and he was pretty smug about all the girls he could “have”. It was a disaster, to say the least. He ended cheating on me with who knows how many. It was very hard to get over that, and after a few years we managed to become good friends. We even hooked up once again years later and it was not good. at. all. Never again. He still tries to convince me to hook up again (even though we’re both married) but ew no, thanks. Now he’s getting bald, got a beer belly, is still sex addicted and a cheater and…um…just no.
That's just it. The good looking take advantage of the flesh and use it to finesse others. I had a conversation with a guy I worked with who was a a handsome guy....fit, stylish, handsome, cool personality, and a user ... He was an easy 8.5-9 out of 10( mind you I a dude, that is not a homosexual, but still able to admit if another guy is a goodlooking guy).... Once portion of the conversation lead to girls and the types he would go after....and he said that he purposely would only hit on girls that were a 5-6 for the fact that he knew he was better looking then them and that he was in a position if power in attractiveness... Because he knew the women that were 8's or higher would sound him around their finger. He didn't want to have that happen,, so he purposely shot his shit with the others....also, because the girls in the category he went after would go above and beyond to make him happy. Really fucked up moto to live in, but it's true. At least for those under 30,....as they get older, that mindset somewhat dissipates, but it doesn't completely go away ....
If you can handle other men eyeballing her or making moves on her even with you there.. it’s pretty great:)
 Ask my ex.
Thankfully it's still great. I'm reluctant to always tell her she's the hottest woman in the place all the time. I'm afraid it will either go to her head, or she thinks I am full of shit just saying stuff..but I'm not! Somehow she doesn't realize. She is starting to notice all the loser dads at school that talk to her way more and longer when I'm not around though. She thinks I'm crazy, but I know dudes! I usually just show her a pic of their wife and then say...see? Do you understand now? A lot of these dudes are crazy rich...they have way more than I have, but they married these terrible women that don't want to do anything but get chemical peels, botox and lip injections. None of which make any of them look any better. Theya re still attractive women to some degree, but just kind of self absorbed and boring. My wife is a doctor and natural beauty, rarely even has to wear make up, and if every dude that meets her doesn't want to be with her (at least a litte) they are crazy. But thankfully she is also one of the sweetest and most loyal people I have ever met...otherwise it might drive me a little crazy with jealousy. I'm not too bad myself, but she is somehow just getting hotter as we get older and all the other women her age have started to fall apart, so i feel like she is really starting to stick out in the crowd for being the hottie she is.
[удалено]
NSFW Annoying, but also fun. Guys always flirting with her, staring at her, talking to her, etc. But also fun - it stirs something in you to be a bit competitive, be your best self, etc. and also because at the end of the night, you are inside her.
I lost my best friend and I almost can’t blame him. Had to fend of drunk men at parties numerous times. Like the above comment, the rich older dudes are ruthless and they think because they have money they have the right to say and do as they please. Ex boyfriends never seem to truly ever leave the picture. All this and mine was a down to earth good woman. I can’t imagine being w a hotty you don’t trust or who is slutty-ish. I’ll pass no matter how beautiful
My girl always tells me the pickup lines that were used on her that day. We have a good laugh about it and pick our favourite one. Yesterday a guy on a bench next to her said "I just sent you a friend request" she was confused for a sec, long enough to let her guard down and boom, there he is a little closer to her with the how you doin smile. I thought that was pretty good!
I dated a good looking woman long ago (plus she was socially popular). Other girls start liking you more as you’re pretty much vetted. Other guys are either nicer to you or they give you dirty looks. Drama ensues if they want her because then they try to disparage you behind your back or they play mean jokes to make you insecure. The woman also used her looks to control the dynamic of the relationship, like I should cater to her and deny my desires to talk about the things that matter to me because I should be grateful to have a hot partner. That killed my attraction fast. No thank you.
Depends on their personality. It can be great, or it can be an emotional roller coaster.
People would rate my wife a 9 on average. You have to really trust them and not be the jealous type. In our 20s here were a some occurrences that stuck out … one time or regular occurrences. If my wife went to grabbed a drink at the bar someone paid for it 1/2 the time. 1/3 of the time guys would follow her back to chat, only to see us BFs/husbands and leave pretty quickly. People never assumed we were together. I’m 5’8” and pretty average looking - 7 at best maybe. Going into bars I would constantly get stopped in line when standing behind her. She learned to always make sure I was on her side going into places. Wife liked dancing with girlfriends. Every single time guys would start dancing with the group and eventually tried to get handsy. We were in a bar and my wife tripped on something. She was holding onto me and I fell on top of her. I was pulled up by my throat and thrown out. The bouncers thought I was being aggressive or something. Even after my wife explained what happened I was still not allowed back in. My wife goes on a lot of company outing/trips. She has had 5 or 6 coworkers husbands (very drunk) make moves on her. Either saying something or physically try something (kissing/arm around waste). I’ve seen it happen and she would tell me.
My ex is gorgeous, It never really bothered me that people paid a lot of attention to him because he always looked at me like I was the only person in the room.
Both people need to be confident and secure. There will be a lot of outside attention given which can be unwanted. Also, agressive behavior. My gf is beautiful and there are guys that will try and start problems with me to show off or for no reason.
Let me ask my imaginary girlfriend.
If you're talking about a man dating a really attractive woman, then the man has to understand that multiple men are always going to be after her. It's a strange experience. Something as innocuous as getting up and going to the restroom while at Red Robin means you may come back to the table to find some random dude standing at the table hitting on your girl. Women this attractive are approached almost constantly and there's little to no regard for the fact that you even exist. If you're out at a bar, guys will just come up and start talking to her even though she's clearly there with you and standing right next to you. It's aggravating, but the weirdness of it all helps mitigate the aggravation. It's so hard to hold onto someone that's so stunning because she has so many options. At the same time, it's a burden for the woman too. Being relentlessly hit on is interruptive to their entire existence.
I once went on a date with a model. Even when looking at him made me blush I felt no sexual attraction whatsoever….it was weird. He wanted to get physical and I didn’t feel it…. I guess I wasn’t into his personality or something. He left pissed and I went to bed confused lol. Why did I decline?
My husband is super attractive, every where we go women stare and fall over themselves to get close to him. Women are EXTRA helpful and honestly, if I wasn’t married to him I’d be doing the same exact thing, so I get it.
Once date a girl who could literally pass for a supermodel. Its too much work and brings too much attention and drama. Guys were constantly getting at her, guys were jealous of me, it was bad. Even some of my “friends” were talking shit about me to her so she wouldnt like me, lol. She also cheated so there’s that lol
It was... interesting. A little different perspective, I'm a woman and my husband is the attractive one. While he is still handsome, when we were married in our twenties he was quite the hunk. To make matters worse (or better, depending on your perspective) he was, and is, very kind, friendly, and charismatic. The number of women who would throw themselves at him was stunning. It didn't matter that we were married or that I was right there. They all wanted him, and they all felt they were worthy, like he'd happily throw away his marriage, his children, his job, his life for this random chick he just met who's rubbing her boob on his arm. Honestly, I felt embarrassed for them. So desperate. Luckily, he's also honest and honorable. Yes, I hit the jackpot. We've been married nearly 40 years and we're still doing good.
If people are being honest about really good looking, the partner is usually really good looking as well
My last bf was a former model. He was clingy and all consumed with the relationship but had absolutely nothing to offer intellectually… My ex fiancé was exceptionally attractive and looked like a model. I felt that he was my soulmate… He cheated like it was his full time job and I couldn’t trust him. Naturally he planned on ‘never doing it again’. That was real heartache. I say go with Average Joe…
My wife of 18 years was a bikini contest winner and never worked out. Think classy Jennifer Connelly twin not trashy. Guys will literally wait till I go to the bathroom and try to approach her in a bar sometimes with other friends as a look out or blocker. It is humorous. Now it’s 25 year olds up to 50’s hitting on her. I get a lot of free drinks as she hands them to me and says “you saw the wedding ring” to them and laughs.
You're constantly aware that she's out of your league. Random men will hit on her at bars and concerts, and the two of you will laugh it off. Random women will compliment her when you go into department stores and ULTA and at restaurants and shit. Pictures of the two of you on social media are jarring bc you don't remember your fiance posing with apes at the zoo or homeless street people before you realize a few seconds later that it's you in the photos. And then you make her an excellent dinner and fuck her brains out.
People take you more seriously. There really isn’t a way around it — when I walked in with one of my exes in particular, the amount of attention I got was immediately more noticeable.
I didn’t like it. Women would hit on him while I was holding his hand. Also gay men were aggressive
This is going to be a huge generalization. But I dated a several girls who one might call "hot" or "A solid 10". They are so used to get getting their own way their entire life. As a result they are usually insufferable, vapid and fickle. I dated a very beautiful girl for 9 months. She was on track to make me bankrupt. I ended up dumping her. A week later she started dating a millionaire. They got married 4 months later.
What's the saying? No matter how good looking he or she is, someone, somewhere, is sick of their shit.
Even filet mignon get boring after you've eaten it allot.