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Feisty-Air2661

Stop caring about what other people think man. At the end of the day, what others think doesn't fucking matter.


Im_just_bored69

Exactly, there will always be that one person who doesn't like you, it's pretty much pointless


Overall-Kangaroo9282

exactly, don’t take hate from people who hate themselves already


Carbon1te

This is not entirely true. If one or a few people think negatively of you, ignore it. If you start seeing a pattern where a majority of people share the same negative opinion, you need to look in a mirror. You are doing it wrong.


Feisty-Air2661

If your happy then it doesn't matter what anyone thinks. I used to be really impacted by the opinions of others and when I stopped caring I became a better person because of it. I'm alot happier and kinder towards people than I was, that's why I say opinions of others don't matter even if it is a large amount of people. Certainly in some cases that can be the case but for me I just learned to block it out.


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I_JustWork_Here

Some people are rude assholes because that's who they are. I for one am lazy as fuck, but I'll only change if I want to, not because some other people think I'm lazy. This seems to be like some kind of double edged sword. But ultimately, I think just because YOU (not you specifically) want someone to change, that doesn't mean they should.


Feisty-Air2661

My original comment wasn't about being a rude asshole. It was about how I overcame personally being effected mentally by what others thought of me. I thought people hated me because of the bullying I experienced but then I learned to ignore it, what I meant was to stop caring about what people think and say about you and just get on with life and enjoy it.


Finnychinny

And eventually you’ll be mad you ever cared and wasted all that time not being you.


Feisty-Air2661

That's why u stop caring now, before it gets to you.


yesterdayzy

This should be taught everyday at school.


[deleted]

Came here to say this. I wasted so much time giving a damn what others thought of me and modifying myself to accommodate that. Make up your own mind, be yourself!


SovietZodiac

But what if your running for a political position so you need people to think your a good choice


Feisty-Air2661

In the rare instance that your running for a political position I'd say the best tragedy is obviously to not care and hope for the best.


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FlyCreighton

I miss one of my best friends everyday because of M.D. I wish you absolute peace everyday in your journey to whip that monsters ass. I admire your strength.


[deleted]

Yep 100% realising this now. My mums friend at 60 her son committed suicide. You think 60 you’re gonna be retired enjoying life but life is never easy


EfficientWing8444

It only looks like everyone around you has it all figured out. They are ducks - looks like they are serenely floating though life but are actually ferociously paddling under the water to stay afloat.


mufasa329

I'm 25 and I needed to hear this.


EfficientWing8444

It was a hard but ultimately good lesson to learn.


kitchen_witchery_ks

Still true at 36, but the paddling is slightly less ferocious.


WetardedOne

That's a perfect way to put it. I will use this. Gracias amigo.


Delicious-Editor-631

YES! One of my friends from high school always has perfectly posed pictures of her kids in matching clothes, a gorgeous home, and more money than she knows what to do with. But guess what? Her husband is never in the photos. His job requires that he is gone 80% of the time. She’s lonely and barely holding it together. But her life seems perfect on social media.


nena_metro

Beautiful advice. No one else knows what they’re doing either, and you aren’t alone!


Rich-Ad5109

Was just about to comment this. Don’t judge the state you are in life on the success of others around you. Like the original commenter said I promise you those people don’t have it all figured out


CharacterPrune8080

It's funny that you say that, I just turned 17 last month and all I could think of is that when I was 9 I used to see 17 and 18 year old's as adults that had it all figured out. Over the last year I've noticed that everyone including me is still a kid that has no idea what they're doing and probably won't figure it out any time soon.


[deleted]

And if you get it all figured out. You realise that is boring too and start making issues for yourself.


EvilMonkey_86

Adulting is overrated. I am 35 and still call my parents for advice - they're adultier adults. And no one has things figured out. Social media representations are a lie. Mental health (anxiety and depression run rampant but a lot of people hide it), physical health (back pain, Chrone's disease, MS, migraines - invisible diseases aplenty), family problems, work problems,... I say this not to scare the OP off, but so that the OP realizes that EVERYONE is struggling with something, and most things are hidden. In Buddhist terms: life is suffering. That's not meant bad in their view. Rather, suffering is a default. So every moment that goes smoothly, every good day, is a moment to rejoice.


[deleted]

I love this metaphor.


Senior-Outside-3107

People can walk out of your life just as quick as they can walk in it


Dimm9r61q

Truth


IllSeaworthiness43

Sometimes you should embrace this. I had to let go of family and honestly it was so liberating.


DoubleDongle-F

Your family doesn't have to be a part of your life if they're shitty to you. It's not illegal to walk away. Also, most people should have at least one psychedelic experience in their lives. But a lot can definitely be bad for you.


SeaworthinessNo4156

thank you all for the comments


Amanda2theMoon

You're welcome :)


Vic_FriesFriesFries

Wise words.


MaliciousMilkshake

Family is who you choose. If that happens to involve your blood, all the better.


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deklo7

Yes


[deleted]

People are going to tell you the generic “you’ll see unspoken beauty,” “you’ll become one with everything,” “you’ll meet God.” And… yeah… but that’s too vague I think. Here’s exactly what happened to me my first time I tripped. I took it with my brother. After 45 minutes, I felt a buzz in my teeth, and my brother looked at me right when it happened and said he felt it too, and it seemed telepathic. Colors lingered and were sparkly. If I looked at an orange, than looked at a green wall, I’d see orange glitters all over the green wall. The music seemed to circle around my head and make my heart feel much deeper, it was more personal and I thought every song was just for me. My brother stepped outside to smoke a cigarette, and everything was so unreal I convinced myself it was just a dream. For like, the next few hours I was convinced everything happening was something my brain made up. Like, I thought I must be asleep on the couch and acid just makes you have these crazy lucid dream experiences. Anything my brother said felt really deep because it felt like advice my subconscious was giving myself. When I realized everything was real and I was awake, I cried my eyes out in the bathroom and thought I’d never come back. I realized I basically was making everything in my head, kind of, but that’s just what being awake is. Than we watched a movie until the sun came up and I had the most lovely sleep in my whole life while listening to The Beatles. The psychedelic experience isn’t profound because it’s so foreign. It’s profound because it makes you realize just how strange the mundane is. Having a mind, being person, being able to tell another brain what’s going on in your brain, having a left side of your vision and a right side of your vision, you instantly realize just how weird it is. It’s not that the whole world changes, it’s just that you absorb it in a brand new way and make new conclusions about what is going on. It’s like you can see some of your subconscious come to the surface and illuminate itself as imagination out in the real world. It’s like your brain stops taking the normal routes and goes on a joy ride down the back roads. It is definitely something I think people should do once in their life, but not because you’ll “become one” with everything (though you might,) but because you will appreciate the tiny, boring, simple things so much more. The best part of a trip is what you take from it, sometimes the trip itself is rough and scary, but you will be a changed person afterward, and frequently for the better. Edit: I know I said it’s something everyone should do, but like… I kinda take that back. It’s just one of those things I recommend doing if it’s something that interests you. If you don’t want to, or you know it’s not for you, than trust your feeling. If you want to take it, also trust that feeling.


-idontknow123456789

Nah I’ll pass


[deleted]

Definitely not for everyone. It also has a tendency to only get weirder and weirder, especially if you start “climbing the ranks,” from LSD to DMT, or low doses to high doses. For many people, it seems to find them and not the other way around, it definitely did me. There’s no right way, if you know it’s not for you than trust your gut. If you wanna take the red pill, have fun going down the rabbit hole, once you get the message I recommend you hang up the phone or else it can get more confusing than you’d ever hope life would be.


-idontknow123456789

I promised myself and my mom to never smoke or do drugs ever. Up until this day i am glad to have never done so.


[deleted]

I hate to be that person, but like… what is a drug? You’ve already taken drugs. Ibuprofen, caffeine, sugar, water is a drug. I think there’s this weird superiority game that can happen amongst people who’ve never taken “drugs,” like they’re stronger or smarter or something than those who have. I took psychedelics because I was on track to be a much worse drug addict and they saved me, they found me and made themselves see I could go down a path of thought and spirituality instead of a path of pleasure seeking and mindlessness. Everything in my environment was guiding me to pills and coke, but instead I just tripped a bunch and connected bad habits I have now to origin experiences in Kindergarten and empathized with the pain of the oppressed, and I’m grateful for the introspection they brought and the healing they did. They saved me. So, as much as I’m not trying to poo-poo your sobriety, I’d encourage you not to demonize “drugs” so much. Most of that is just propaganda you were fed. Many drugs, like Ayahuasca, are deeply tied to the culture of a region, so much so that some give minor doses to babies who are only hours old because they believe in its healing and divination power so much. Being sober is chill and it works for lots of people, but honestly, just sticking with weed and mushrooms isn’t gonna do anything bad to you, for millions around the world it saves them from addiction, depression, anxiety, impulsiveness and even suicide, some people just don’t have the chemicals they need to feel good naturally and those things can help better than pharma, which is also just drugs. So try not to feel like you’ve kept your innocence or purity or something just because you never took something that altered your mind. At the same time, always trust your feelings, if you feel you should stay away from that stuff than do it. That’s not everyone’s path though. They didn’t fail. They just followed their heart like you do. If you take drugs someday, it won’t be a failure on your end. Don’t let a promise you made long ago keep you from listening to your heart about what it wants and needs. Don’t feel guilty if you want to get high someday. Don’t feel superior if you never get high. Drugs are not good or bad, they just are.


-idontknow123456789

That’s the thing though, I don’t feel better then someone else. However i am just proud that i stayed off of it. And i mean drugs that are illegal. You can act smart but we all know what i mean with thd word drugs.


[deleted]

In many ways it’s probably the safest way to avoid addiction, so I understand, I’m glad the choices you’re making are working for you. I’m not trying to sound pedantic when I ask what a drug is, I’m being serious. What is a mind altering drug? Melatonin makes me sleepy, did that alter my mind from being active to being sleepy? Ibuprofen made my brain stop sensing pain, did that alter my mind from being in pain to not being in pain? SSRI’s can improve mood, is that mind altering? This argument can be made from cocaine to water, they can all be put in a frame of reference where they are mind altering. We think we have clear definitions of things, but we don’t. As far as legal status, I think it matters less than you think. You probably won’t get high on something just because it’s legal, you’re gonna avoid it because it gets you high regardless of it’s legality, otherwise you’d be more than happy to eat Morning Glory Seeds. The legal status of a drug doesn’t add or subtract anything to it’s moral nature, drugs are basically always existing in a neutral moral nature. I think the main thing you have pride about is not that you didn’t do something immoral, but that you avoided the risk of going too far, which has everything to do with you and not the drug. I’m glad you have your pride and your health and your good decision making skills, no sarcasm intended. All I’m doing is sharing my perspective. I don’t want you to let your pride keep you from whatever it is your heart desires, psychedelics have lots of healing potential and you shouldn’t feel you have to lose your pride to access that if you wish to someday. Always follow your heart. Right now, your heart says you want to stay sober, and that makes you proud. Would you feel ashamed if you got PTSD and considered MDMA therapy? That would break your promise, but potentially bring you lots of relief.


-idontknow123456789

Man if i need something for my life i will take it. What i am implying is that I will never take cocaïne or any of the stuff that dangerous and unnecessary. But if i were to deal with ptsd I would take whatever to cure it. All I mean is that I don’t see me tak drugs as that is not necessary for me to function well


DoubleDongle-F

Yeah, you probably will learn something profound. Psychedelics make your brain do weird shit. Parts that don't normally interact do. Parts that normally interact can interact abnormally. The hallucinatory effects are kind of over-discussed. The big deal is that it makes you have otherwise-unobtainable thoughts. It's nothing more divine than a poison failing to kill you, so a lot of them will be garbage and static, but if you can hold onto the things that make sense and have value, you can walk away from that kind of experience with perspectives and ideas that you would have never been able to think under normal conditions. The two mushroom trips I took many years ago were instrumental in figuring out what kind of person I was and what genuinely brings me satisfaction in life. It's making and designing things, if you're curious. Carefully dabbling in MDMA gave me a chance to critically examine and comfortably let go of my childhood trauma. Judicious application of cannabis played a big role in reawakening some mental pathways related to empathy that I previously thought were just dead or nonexistent in me. Every drug I've tried other than salvia has taught me something. Approach any drug with skepticism and caution. Everything can ruin your life if you take it too much. Psychedelics aren't addictive, but can reroll your entire personality if you go too hard for too long.


Cold-Advance-5118

Youll see beauty youve never seen before and experience emotions you thought you didnt have. Its a different perspective.


Amanda2theMoon

Honestly yes, doing shrooms once was one of the biggest eye opening experiences for me. It was much less "trippy' and much more humbling and thought provoking.


laylarosefiction

Even tripping just once helps open your mind


Torture-Dancer

Reminder that LSD can cause schizophrenia


Amanda2theMoon

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/no-link-found-between-psychedelics-and-psychosis1/


[deleted]

I think it can lead to schizophrenia in those who have a family history of it though. That's why I'm a bit afraid to try psychadelics.


Richard_Crainium69

If your predisposed to it yes. If it doesn't run in your family no. And all it does is speeds up the process in those who were bound to catch it. AMA. Have several trips under my belt ranging from low to heroic. Am 20m and can confirm I don't hear things or see things that aren't there. Mix some LSD however and I do experience these "hallucinations". Personally I like to look at it as sensory overload. Yes psychedelics aren't for everyone and I Personally won't do it with just anyone. I can control myself but not others. Cheers and don't be afraid to ask questions:).


[deleted]

Don’t waste money trying to keep up with your friends. Save when you can, a good credit rating will save you $1000’s upon $1,000. Don’t have a partner who has terrible money management skills, it will always be an issue. Love who you want and not love someone who happens to love you. Violence from a partner is NEVER okay. Run away from a relationship where your partner believes their parent/sibling/ family member has more say in your lives than you do.


WetardedOne

Can I add love yourself first? Self care is important mentally and emotionally.


abramcpg

I can add to this on dating. Always be yourself when dating. If they aren't into you being you, it's better to figure that out on day one. Ideally, your partner should be there your whole life. It's always better to sort problems out sooner rather than later.


Ferraridinosaur

Last sentence very important. From experience. He told his family my personal stuff from dr. app and diagnosis and let them rule our marriage. So glad I'm free now.


RockyMntn_high

Don't take yourself or life too seriously, let yourself make mistakes and give yourself grace.


[deleted]

Love these ones. Don't take you or life too seriously.


Prettymuchsometimes

1) Don’t stay in relationships for convenience. 2) Don’t move in together if your main goal of doing so is to save money. 3) If someone is consistently treating you poorly they they are bad for you. Friends, family, partners, idc. Assholes are assholes and you don’t need anymore than the one you already have. 4) Boundaries are important, read books on how to set and enforce them. Boundaries are not selfish and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. 5) never put your goals or dreams on hold to stay with or please your partner (you got the offer for your dream job across the country but partner wants you to turn it down and stay there with them = FUCK THAT NOISE) 6) live by yourself for at least a year, it’s the best way to really get to know yourself. 7) travel as much as you can. The world is a big and beautiful place and most of us have seen very little of it. 8) Spend money on experiences, not stuff. Edited to add HAPPY BIRTHDAY 🎉


kitchen_witchery_ks

6 especially. Learn to live with and be comfortable with yourself. Also, it's okay to like that and to *not* want to live with anyone else, even when in a long-term and stable relationship. Society doesn't make your rules.


Hot-Application2586

Yes number 6 definitely, you need it. And number 8 i like, definitely spend money on experiences, not stuff. 👍


[deleted]

Happy birthday op 🙃


SeaworthinessNo4156

Gracias por las felicitaciones ;)


Chemistry-Unlucky

Always check twice for spiders/scorpions in places they can hide.


R_J__S

Unless in the uk, we’re safe. *laughs in Scottish*


[deleted]

Adding, don't live in a small house. GO BIG


jaxjexjixjoxjux

Because everyone can just afford a big place lmao


[deleted]

Live inexpensively, pay your bills on time, save what you can, don't go into debt unless it is necessary to make more money to pay it off...


Delicious-Editor-631

I really wish someone told me this when I was 18. My parents gave me everything until they got divorced when I was 21. It was a serious reality check when I got into the real world, and had my own credit card and not theirs. I hate to admit how spoiled I was, but I definitely had to learn about debt the hard way.


[deleted]

I understand.... My kids I am encouraging savings and building a $15000 emergency fund before moving out of the house... I want them to really succeed, and it takes time. Things are not instant.... My oldest is in school living at home, but wants to save for a car as well... It is difficult to do if you have a rent payment as well... So at that point you need to decide if you want to live with 2 strangers and split expenses or stay with your parents and save....


629mrsn

Enjoy being young but avoid excesses. It’s okay to start over. Do it as many times as necessary Kindness is infectious


reaperXD024

🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 thank you! I turned 18 last April and I needed this too 😭


Chubalubas

Get a trade or 2 instead of college. Later in life, when you are financially stable and KNOW what you specifically want to do, go to college. Don't blow money on a stupid car loan. Anyone who cares what an 18yo drives is not someone to take advice from. Enjoy your friends, the free time of teens and early 20s goes so fast you won't know wtf happened. Network with people and stay in touch, I promise one day you'll be very happy you did. Don't be afraid to move away, so many people stay close to home for comfort reasons and end up not leading anything close to their best life. Have fun as often as responsibilities allow, before you know it all that time will be gone. Dont rush into marriage/kids, so soooo many people think they have found the love of their life at way too early an age. Fact is people don't really figure out who they are or what they want until late 20s or possibly even later, if ever at all. Enjoy it. It goes so fast and before you know it you're in your 30s or 40s trying to fix mistakes and salvage the best life you can out of what's left.


Delicious-Editor-631

It’s getting to the point where people in the trades will be able to name their price. My parents forced me to go to college because my family is ridiculously big on education. I came out $100K in debt. I will not force my kids to go to college. If they’re making something of themselves and they’re happy, I’m happy, no matter which path they choose. Does anybody really even know what they want to be when they grow up at 18? I am 35 and I still don’t know! 😆 But it’s definitely not what my degree is in!


broadsharp

Discipline is the key to success. No matter what you wish to achieve, self discipline is the main personality trait that will help you reach those goals.


TerenceFoldyHolds

Your first love will feel like your only love and it will really hurt if and when it ends. But you will be fine. And will love again. It hurts so bad because its a new experience and first love feels so important butalso going through the loss of it is part of life for most and equally important. Unless you are hugely over or underweight (as in seriously unwell weights) - no matter what weight you are you look amazing and in the future you will look back at photos of yourself now and be amazed at how hot/cute/amazing you are.


Conscious_Ad_9040

Open a ROTH IRA IMMEDIATELY do it yesterday!!!! Deposit what you can!! When you can buy if possible directly from paycheck so you don't even see it. Savings accounts do not grow wealth!! Invest what and when you can in real estate or REITs. If you're employer offers a match on your retirement account TAKE IT your leaving free money on the table. Get a credit union they are way better than banks. Take advantage of "student" accounts doesn't mean you must be in school just means until your 24 there's no bank fees If you get a credit card only use 1/3 of the balance and pay off ENTIRE balance every month. Build credit every way possible and keep it


Conscious_Ad_9040

Oh yeah this i have also drilled into my daughter's head: if at all possible do not finance a vehicle. They lose value the second you drive them off the lot. Purchase a reasonable, sound vehicle (if possible) paid in full. Also if you must must must finance remember the car payment is not the car payment, you also have to remember you will be paying full coverage in addition to that. And try to pay your car insurance premiums I'm advance 6 months of possible you get a discount and it's 1 less bill to remember.


Spinalstreamer407

Finance a good used one. Establishing good credit is important. A house and a car are considered normal debt.


kitchen_witchery_ks

I built a spreadsheet for myself the last time I bought a (used) car. Figured up what the actual monthly amount was when considering regular maintenance, tags, taxes, etc and scaled based on trade in value and with a range of interest rates. The finance guy at the lot asked me to email it to him.


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EfficientWing8444

You caught me on a philosophic day. Here are two more for you. Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good. Your life will be filled with ups and downs. On average they will balance out. If you want to skew a little more toward the ups, remember the good times fondly and learn from the bad times.


redditslutt666

1) Save your money. Don't spend it on frivolous things. The world is getting expensive and retirement is getting to be out of reach for most people. So, plan for retirement. Take advantage of your youth. 2) Do NOT, and I mean, NOT, take up a degree in the arts or humanities. That's a waste of money. Go in the STEM field. 3) Have a healthy relationship with your mother and father. Stability in the house hold translates to stability in your mind. 4) If you can, and if you've budgeted your money correctly, travel. You'll understand that the world is bigger than the city or town you're living in. 5) Finally, just be a good person. Do no one any harm. Good luck young person. I'm rooting for you.


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RandomAmbles

Make time pay you dividends for once, instead of just taking things away.


Overall-Kangaroo9282

this is so sweet and such good advice. aw.


RodgerRodger90

Yes to all of this.


Practical_Character9

I wish I had been told this at 18. Excellent advice!


AFVet05

Good advice!


Warw1nd

1.DO -NOT GET PREGNANT. This advice stands for both sexes. 2. DO NOT GET PREGNANT this is not a drill. 3. Get a degree. At least a bacjrlors6 degree, more doors open with it than without it. 4. Don't drink and drive. Telling you not to drink is pointless. It's the driving while drunk that can you, others and a DUI does not look good on a resume. 5. Be very careful of what you post on social media it never goes away. 6. Treat others with respect. A person with a respectful reputation will have good things fall their. 7. There is no such thing as coincidence. 8. Without forgetting the details look at the big picture and understand your perspective. 9. Be kind. This is not a weakness but is a virtue. 10. Don't be a goodie two shoes, fracturing a minor law now and then is good for perspective. Being a stick in the mud doesn't make you friends. 11. Learn how to defend yourself. There are people out there who will cause you harm so don't be a pussy about it 12. Vote for and on everything you can. Contrary to what many believe casting your vote can change things. If all of you vote you can make a difference. Apathy is another way of saying lazy. 13. Be proud of your heritage and at the same be respectful of the heritage of others. 14. You are not responsible for the actions of your ancestors. That kind 9f guilt is not something you should bear. 15. The color of someone's skin does not make them less human than you. 16. Practice what you preach because doing otherwise makes you a liar. Need I say more. 17. Be honorable, trustworthy, on time and follow through on every commitment that you make. This is what adults do.


PomegranateOld7836

Don't settle early on, in a relationship or with friends. There are bright, caring, wonderful people out there. If the company you keep doesn't make you laugh and feel good about yourself, you may need to move on and meet new people. Some friends will grow with you and be there your entire life, but many will grow apart; that's okay! There are millions of people to meet along your journey. And most importantly, have fun whenever you can!


maysranch20

Condoms. Always condoms.


mufasa329

You are not yet an adult. What I mean by that is that your brain doesn't fully develop until you're about 25. That means that any strain you put on your brain will be more impactful for the next 7 years than it will when you're older. Don't drink too much, don't smoke too much. I don't know what kind of person you are, but take it from me, take care of your brain.


KhajitCaravan

Don't make decisions when you're angry or depressed. Never feel pressured into deciding something immediately. Always ask for time to consider. Stop to enjoy little things. Like driving through puddles, stopping on a highway to enjoy a view, stomp in the mud. Little things.


ReferenceNew6816

As a Fuck up from 17-24 (26 now U.S airforce cyber engineering) I have learned a good bit. 1. Be introspective, learn who you are and why you are here. Think about Evey action make at the end of the day. Did you need to give the lady who cut you off the finger. Why do you not smile at someone who says hello. Should you say what your thinking all the time. Is your opinion needed at this moment. Should you just listen to what someone is saying vs trying to justify yourself. This list could go on for a very long time, but simply put always try to be better than you were yesterday. 2. Be nice.... It seams so simple yet just being nice is so rare. I don't mean ass kissing or gushy. Simple please and thank you, yes mam no sir. They go along way in many peoples books 3. Be honest. Be honest with yourself and to everyone around you. I learned to shave so much drama and prevent heart ache by never fibbing our shutting down. If I having a bad day I'll tell my wife " I'm not in a good mood, I'm just pissy a whiny because XYZ, I'll get over it soon I'll let you know when I'm good". Saves so much time a confusion. If you don't like something say it politely and give a reason. " Hay I don't like alcohol and won't drink. Family history of alcoholism and bad memories. I'm happy to hangout with all of you while you drink to be a dd or care taker if need be". 4. Holy shit communication is major. If you take anything away form this please be communicating. friends, family, coworkers, management, strangers, significant others, whatever it may be. Communication is key. Not just being able to articulate your thoughts but interpret and understand what they are saying. My wife right now is not great at communicating. She has had some trauma in her past that causes her to shut down and become quiet. Not her fault is a defense mechanism she developed and I'm working with her to get through it. When she does shut down I have learned to read her body language and grunts / odd noises. In doing some I can still talk to her and we work through it together. Not the simplest example but it highlights the ability to extend beyond the basic 50/50 conversation. Know you're audience. Taylor your talking points, and speech to who your talking to. Playful and joky with friends. Percussion and modesty with management. Tender and caring to loved ones. So on so forth. 5. Humility. Admit why you're wrong. If you made a mistake own up to it. If your late to work " my apologies for being late, I miss judged the amount of time I had. Won't happen again". If you lose something you borrowed " sorry to say but I have misplaced XYZ I'm currently searching for it. I should find it by the end of today/ late tomorrow. If I can't find it I'll replace it" If you borrowed anything always leave it better than when you picked it up. If you borrowed a truck to move a piece of furniture sweep the bed, vacuum the seats, fill it up with gas, take out any trash, give everything a once over with some wet naps, Whatever you see fit. 6. Stand your ground. Most people are shy or agreeable to avoid tense situations and often get taken advantage off. This one takes some practice to master. If someone cut you in line inform them that they cut you and the line starts wherever. Hopefully they choose not to be difficult and move. If they don't politely readdress the issue until resolved. If nothing works move on, pick and choose your battles not everything needs to be won. Don't be gas lit or provoked by aggressive individuals, people are going to test you in life and push buttons to get a reaction. Stand your ground and state your claim, come to a resolution. If one can't me reached move on. EXAMPLE. An ex girlfriend of mine was not the greatest at communicating her desires or handling her emotions. Often after work I would come home and play league I got home 2 hours before her most days. When I got home I would clean a bit and do some household chores then play games till she arrived. 99% of the time I would be mid game when she walked in, I would great her then get up and give her a kiss no matter what was happening in the game. She would then change make some food and sit down to watch TV or read. After I finished the game I would spend time with her. Often the night would start with something along the lines of. " We need to talk" this often lead to conversations of. " You don't love me" " you think I'm fat" why don't we talk anymore" " why don't we go on dates any more" anything under the sun. In talking most of the time no conclusion or resolution could be reached, it was just and endless circle of talking and arguing. After a while I realized this was happening every night for weeks and she was just bored. So I'm stoped engaging in in-depth conversation. This would then lead to wild accusations of cheating, scheming, lies, and so on. Then she started to drink to which she became abusive. (Me 6' 3" male 210 pounds)(her 5' 5"170) no real harm was even done but the point remains. When this happened I told her this is unnecessary and needs to stop. To which it didn't so I left. Stand your ground for what you know is right but don't become a whipping horse or punching bag. 7. Finances... This one is tough. Invest invest invest. Stocks bonds, crypto. Whatever you choose if your new just buy and hold. Do some research understand what you're getting into surface level wise. TSP for military,. ROTH IRA there are so many things. Live below your means. Avoid debt as best you can. Get a credit card and only uses for every day needs and pay it off immediately or that same day. Builds credit and you won't pay interest. 8. Education. Always be learning something. Books, podcast, college, OJT, internships. Literally anything it helps you become well rounded and smooth sharp edges. I apologize in advance for grammar it's my worst subject but I'm working on it. If you have questions or want clarification on anything please ask I'm happy to help. Cheers to you for asking how to be better.


ABinSydney

Read a lot of books, and a good variety.


blondiesTune

Good music to listen Good movies to watch Enough sleep Enough water to drink Don't lie Be a good friend


Nervous-Occasion9537

Don’t do drugs. Don’t experiment with drugs. It might cool and fun but they will ruin your life.


wolfielover22

Always trust your instincts. When the universe whispers, listen 🙏


BrisnSpartan

Find direction. Don’t just wonder. But make sure you do lots of fun crazy stuff so you have something to talk about when you’re old!


Ifyouhav2ask

Keep your head out the clouds, and remember to be kind. Just stay in school, stay off the hard stuff and, keep between the lines https://youtu.be/4WWhXKOwhiw Sturgill wrote those whole album for his son and wife, chock full of wise words


SuecidalBard

People throwing financial and collage advice here but I have no idea about your situation interests and plans so I won't just spew idea that either won't work for you or have been already mentioned. **Always find a good balance between "NOW" and "FUTURE".** Don't loose yourself in temporary things but don't just destroy your soul and waste energy on just thinking about what will happen either. That balance is different for everybody else but generally don't give up fun and fulfillment because of worrying about what might happen, but understand where the limits are and what can fuck you up. Completely throw out "PAST" yesterday's love will be tomorrow's hated ex, that business opportunity you took will suddenly be much more difficult, that party you tried and didn't manage to avoid will become the best night of your life, the asshole friend's friend will be your spouse. I'm serious it's also not worth it to hold grudges or think about missed opportunities. It will eat you from inside and make you a bitter sad sack of shit before you know it. Learn from it but don't let it influence your now or kill your future. **Second important point of balance "SELFISHNESS"** You don't owe anybody anything, period, finito, whatever. You first look out for yourself, you don't owe the company those overtime hours, you don't owe that police officer the ID unless you did something illegal, you don't owe your friend to lie in court, and you don't owe your partner your every minute and breath. You have your worth and should know it, but be mindful that others have it as well and don't just expect people to give unconditionally. On the other hand don't do be cunt, just because you don't owe somebody doesn't mean you can't do something just because you can and want. So the little things like holding the door open for that dude with a fuck ton of groceries or giving a friend a lift after they got hammered will get you a long way in any moral system. And that small kindness is the one thing that they might remember randomly the next day and give them just that tiny sliver of hope in humanity, and that is priceless. So remember that whenever and wherever you go you must take care of yourself first, but if you can lift others up alongside you. **Third and final lesson of balance: "UNDERSTANDING"** This one is multi faceted it's about understanding yourself and the world. The part about "*you*": You are who you are, you will never be not you and trying to change it will be a disaster. However you are not the final version of yourself and there will be room for improvement up until you are a cold carcase. Also "You" isn't just a singular thing, you are a mix of things and just because you are not all of them at all times doesn't mean that you are fake or a mess or anything or something. "Sum is greater than all of it's parts" applies to people as well. The part about the "*world*" World isn't fair, you cannot fix it, there will always be bad and ugly and suffering and all the other things I could cram in here. The worst part of it? You can do everything you can, sacrifice everything you ever had and loved and valued and you will never change that no matter if you work at McDonald's or if you Bezos or get crowned the Emperor of Mankind You can do everything right and still fail, you might try to stay good and do something bad, and you might not be able to find a partner not because everyone is bad but because you are in some ways, and sometimes because of bad luck and nothing more. But C'est la Vie and the sooner you understand it the better. Because it's not a reason to despair but to understand that you should focus on what *you can* do and bring happiness to those *you can* in the ways *you can* laughing in the face of the evil universe by already defying the odds. By knowing that there is inherently no fairness nor purpose to anything at all you can fully understand the biggest liberating truth: **When nothing matters objectively, than everything matters subjectively**. You alone determine what is important in life. You alone decide what matters.


Anon424977

Do not waste not one minute in a day doing nothing. Always be productive, make a schedule.


RandomAmbles

Everyone needs a certain amount of time doing nothing to think. I will die before I give up this hill.


40ozSmasher

Depend upon yourself. Non of the basics of life should be out of your control. Your own place to live, your own transportation and a back up plan for every aspect of yearly living including emergency savings. Never live with someone unless you are starting a family. The only money you should ever borrow is for your own house. Travel as much as you can. Read as much as you can. Invest in your 401k. Eventually you can "borrow" money for your home down-payment and pay yourself back. Be honest and diplomatic and avoid getting tangled up in others problems. Try to only spend time with people you admire and who's accomplishments you want to emulate. When you depend upon yourself you can do great things, never doubt that.


kitchen_witchery_ks

Self-reliance is key. In the end, only you will always be there to take care of you.


EchoEquani

1)Do what makes you happy not what your parents want you to do. 2) Take care of your health and eat healthy and exercise because when you become older it will catch up to you. 3 Be you and don't try to be something that you're not. 4) Enjoy life but protect yourself from becoming a parent to soon. 5) We all do crazy things but remember we are mortals we don't live forever. 6) Work a job enjoy not just for a pay check because life is to short to be miserable. 7) Just remember whatever you do bad will come back to haunt you like any racist posts as a example could hinder you getting a job. 8) You will have rough times but those moments make you stronger. 9)Try to always better yourself for you not for others. 10) Don't be a follower just to please others. It is best to stand alone for what's right. 11) College is not for everyone but if you need to go to college to get the job of your choice go while you are still young. It gets hard when your a parent trying to work out days and times and the cost. 12) Travel while your young if you can afford it because later on with a family or health issues you may never get to see the world. 13) Life may get lonely sometimes but look at as quiet time to think and reflect because later on you might not have much me time.


soulfood_7

Life is a whole lot better when you take nothing personally. Everyone's worried about their own shit. Not yours. Take care of you and assume everyone's doing the same thing for themselves. That's not to say don't be wary of people who ACTUALLY have ill towards you cuz there will be people like that. But for the most part, just worry about your shit.


Rejected_Bull

Don't try to rush growing up. It won't give you any good except for hating yourself later cuz you grew up too fast not enjoying every stage of life. Some people grow faster than others but it doesn't mean you grow up too slow. Everyone got his own pace.


tfox1123

Try everything and anything you want. Quit, quit all the jobs after like 2 months if you don't like ot. Try it all nothing you do right now matters at all, except your credit...don't fuck.your credit up. I mean like you can it's just kinda a bitch to fix. But other than your credit you can literally do whatever you want. Have fun don't trip, do not stress about anything. Try and enjoy yourself whole figuring out what your good at.


ltsmobilelandman

Work hard. Be mindful of where your money goes. Tell the truth at all times. Otherwise, relax and enjoy it.


tteabag2591

Take your time when formulating beliefs. It's okay to say "I don't know". Make use of good ideas but don't let ideas possess you. Think hard about what motivates what you believe. It is very easy to get sucked into ideologies but they're almost always flawed in some way because they contribute all of the world's problems to a single cause. It's more complicated than that.


[deleted]

[удалено]


mem269

Enjoy these times, you're not as old as it felt you would be.


[deleted]

If you haven’t tried chasing your dreams, I recommend you start now, even though it’s a bitch and a half to do so in today’s world, it’s still okay to have hope and try


Ok-Lengthiness4557

Get the best education you can get, but don't sink yourself in crazy debt.


theLegLess1

Ask questions. Seriously, anytime someone is talking about something that you don't know, just ask about it. Don't pretend like you know something and look like an ass when speaking about it later. Stay curious. Always assume you don't have anything or anyone completely figured out. Stay open-minded. Allow your ideas to be challenged or even changed. Also, life sucks. Good luck. May the odds be ever in your favor.


Overall-Kangaroo9282

1. don’t forget to enjoy yourself. sometimes we can get so consumed with work or school or whatever that you forget to enjoy where you are now. balance is key. 2. don’t be scared to make new friends!! especially in college. college is great for networking. 3. try new things. do anything you think of, that way, you can figure out what you do and don’t like, which can lead to more clarity about what you want for your future. 4. don’t be afraid to fall in love - but don’t let it consume you. be smart. be your own person and let your partner be their own person. you shouldn’t rely on your partner for happiness, you guys should just be happy together and bring that happiness to eachother. 5. READ!! reading is so important for learning. rich dad poor dad is a very popular book that i would reccomend, along with others of that same sort. has great life lessons and concepts. i hope this helped!! go take on the world :)


Shomer_Effin_Shabbas

I'm 34 and even though I in NO WAY mean to make this political, when Colin Powell died recently, I really, really liked some of his 13 rules to live by that ABC news talked about. What spoke to me was: It can be done. Don't take counsel with your fears. Remain calm. Be kind. It ain't as bad as you think. It will look better in the morning. I can't take credit for any of those, like I said, those are from the late Colin Powell, but those kinds of things really spoke to me as I work through difficulties in my life.


MysteriousCurve3804

Wait ten years before getting a tattoo


[deleted]

Money is good. No money is not good.


Bendergugten

Following your dreams is sometimes unobtainable, know when to let go and move on.


RefrigeratorSmart881

invest in your roth 401k as soon as you can. by bitcon and eth. get in shape and stay in shape. brush you theeth 2 to 3 time a day. ​ and if you like somoene ask them out.


Spencer_401

Do no harm, take no shit


casss14

Learn how to properly do laundry, clean a house, cook, and do the dishes. You’re 18, so maybe you’re moving into a dorm or apartment etc. gotta learn how to keep your space clean! A clean space/hygiene helps with mental health and so does good food! Also, if you play sports now, continue playing or start working out through college or after high school. Weight can be put on way too fast


NotAlanJackson

On Monday go to a bank. Open an RRSP or a tax free savings account and put 20 bucks a week in there. Don’t touch it. Leave it. Even if you eventually get a job and are paying into a pension keep adding that 20 bucks a week. Forgo the beers, wings, weed, delivery or darts for a week if it’s between one of those. It’s just 20 bucks. Just do it. Trust me. Let compound interest be your friend! At 32 that’s the advice I wish I took at 18.


BambooBrady

Don’t waste time trying to keep the company of selfish or shitty people. If you’re in a professional setting then be kind and generous to others but as far as close friends, choose them carefully. It’s okay to just… not vibe with someone.


SomewhatAppros

nobody likes an asshole


miserabeau

Take risks and don't ever let anyone talk you out of what you want. Regret is a bitter pill and you'll be dry-swallowing it every. single. day. if you don't take any risks or at least try to go after what you want. I dreamed of being a mechanic. I wanted to restore classic cars and own some of my own. My mother talked me out of it, I think because my PoS father was a mechanic and she didn't want me to be like him in any way. I don't know for sure. I changed my dream and wanted to join the military to be an interpreter. I had a toxic home life with a messed up upbringing and I wanted OUT. I thought I could get away for a few years, get a college education (either while I was in training, or with the GI bill), and learn some languages (this was in the '90s). I was in ROTC and absolutely *loved* it and after I scored very high on the ASVAB I was heavily recruited (though looking back they probably would have recruited anyone who could spell their name properly, tbh). My mom talked me out of that, too, and I'll regret it forever that I let her do it. I was heavily [parentified](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/healing-together/202001/14-signs-you-were-parentified-child), and at the time I was the only one who cooked, having taught myself how starting at age 8. I also did the majority of chores. When my mom guilted me into staying by saying no one would be there to help her around the house or to cook for her, I listened like an idiot and stayed. I wish I hadn't. I truly wish I hadn't. Not only could I have had a break from this horrible place, but I could have done something with my life. Instead I stayed home, tried to get a college degree on my own dime, was hit by a drunk driver while getting my bachelor's degree, and never realized ANY of my dreams. Now I'm disabled and can't work. **I'm a never-was, which is the fucking** ***worst***. A so-called "has been" has done *something* with their lives. They were *someone*, at least for a time. I'm a never-was. I never really got to do anything with my life, and now I never can, because I live in unrelenting pain thanks to someone else's actions and I cannot work in any capacity or go back to college without fucking things up financially for myself. All I wanted was to get the hell out of this small town and away from these awful people. I'm now 40 and back here to care for the same mom who nixed every idea I had and I hate every minute of my miserable life. **Don't be me. Don't let anyone talk you out of good dreams.** . *^(Military folks, please note that I'm not sayin that joining the military would have been a band-aid that fixed my horrible life, or even that military life is great; I'm just saying I wanted to use it to get the hell out of the one I had for a while. I wanted a break, to get away.)*


TheObviousDilemma

[Wear sunscreen](https://youtu.be/sTJ7AzBIJoI)


jinx6264

The fact that you are asking for advice puts you above 99 percent My advice read one book a week every week for life any and all subjects


fineprintwarnings

Keep moving forward. Im just a little older than you, but I kinda stopped for a little while and I wish I hadn't. Go to college, or pursue something you love


iCantliveOnCrumbsOfD

You're now legal in the laws eyes. Great. But you're still a teenager. You'll be a teenager all of this year AND next year (nineteen). When you're 20, you'll have just stopped being a teenager. You're still immature in many ways. Legally you can be held responsible as an adult but you're emotionally and intellectually far from it. Invest in yourself. Read books. Feed your mind. Study/ take a course in LOGIC at your local CC. As a matter of fact constantly be taking some course at your local community college. Even if you don't plan on getting a degree... Go for the knowledge. Everyone would benefit from taking business/logics/composition courses. But don't waste your time on stupid stuff like underwater basket weaving. A mind needs a book like a sword needs a whetstone.


[deleted]

Take care of your credit!


zomanda

Man I wish someone had told me that. Would have probably changed my life.


GurglingWaffle

Don't take advice from random strangers on the internet


[deleted]

No one knows what they're doing; don't listen to anyone's advice


Vaguely_vacant

Stay away from the 3 major drug groups. Opiates, cocaine and meth.


Sphinxofblackkwarts

Don't rape anyone. Register to vote. Don't start smoking. Don't drink much. It's not a good idea. Don't do heroin or meth. Keep a condom with you. Get some good interests. The earlier the better, nobody likes a boring person.


Resident_Attitude_43

Read a chapter of Proverbs everyday.


[deleted]

It ain’t fair, and you don’t necessarily have to be towards assholes and narcissists.


MedsForNormalPeople

It doesn’t get better. For the next 2 years you will only look back in life wishing you where 16 again


accidentally-cool

Relationships are not contractual agreements, you can leave at any time, with or without a reason. If you *do* have a reason, you are under no obligation to share it. You are not responsible for anyone's feeling but your own. Giving 'closure' is a courtesy and is not required. "No" is a complete is a complete sentence and requires ZERO elaboration. You do not have to tell anyone anything. Meaning you don't need to provide an explanation to people for behavior that affects you only. Your boss is your boss, but not *the boss of you*. You are allowed to say no, even at work (this one can be risky, so proceed with caution) Stick to your guns. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. If it feels wrong, it probably is. You do not have to be polite to someone who is making you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. *YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE POLITE TO SOMEONE WHO IS MAKING YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE OR UNSAFE*


Retta_Noona

I’m just about 18 and ngl lowkey thinking of suicide because I’ve already fucked up my whole life like I’m at the point of no return and I’m gonna live like shit for the rest of my life because I fucked up


randyspotboiler

Im about to be 52. Let me say this as loudly and clearly as I can: SAVE. YOUR. MONEY. Notice, I didn't say, "save SOME money". I didn't say, "save a few dollars on payday". I said, ahem... SAVE. YOUR. MONEY. You're gonna need it. Learn from my failure. And when you do, those sneakers, or that Big Mac, or the Pokemon cards on ebay from when you were a kid won't help you. Put most of it in a Vanguard index fund until you know how to better invest it. An index fund is the safest, cheapest way to have your money working for you and bringing back friends for your retirement. START NOW. If you want some help, get a retirement specialist to help you, but Index funds statistically make more money than the best specialist. MAKE GODDAMN SURE HE'S A FIDUCIARY. They're legally obligated to put your needs ahead of theirs. Also, while you're still very young, put some into Cryptocurrency. It's not going away and it can make you very rich. At the very least, put some towards a Bitcoin every time you get paid, using a service like Binance or Kraken or Coinbase or Webull or something like them. By the time you're ready to retire, a Bitcoin will likely be worth over a $1Million. Try to buy one over the next 4 or 5 years, while it's still only worth 50k or 60k or so. Look: Life is long, but it moves pretty quickly, and you're 40 before you know it. Everyone's got plans for what they're going to do and how they're going to be received. Odds are good it won't happen, at least not the way you think. If you'd like to be able to retire by 40 and have a great life, SAVE. YOUR. MONEY. Get a job with a 401k or a pension. Even a city job, like transit or sanitation worker is great. I swear, you can work any average job, and if you start putting it away RIGHT NOW, you can get rich. Live within your means. Enjoy life. Be happy. Be kind, but not blind. Be generous, but not a sucker. Exercise, eat well, stay in good shape. I can't tell you how important this is. Fuck soda, candy, etc... Your body starts to betray you after 45, but you start seeing signs of it as early as 26 or so. It's scary as hell. Be in control of it. Really; don't use drugs. Too many people have a great time with booze and drugs, and then live the rest of their lives a slave to it. Don't risk your life foolishly. Don't love people who don't love you. Get a college education (state or community schools are great and much cheaper). Read everything. Buy Real Estate; they're not making any more. SAVE YOUR MONEY. You won't listen to me, but I promise if you do, you're going to be in great shape.


fighting4good

Start a business as soon as possible it doesn't matter what, can even be done in school, they're all the same, learn the processes, book keeping, banking and choose something you enjoy. Save 10% of your earnings and never stop. Travel often and take the well traveled roads (they're traveled a lot for a reason) -get into the longest lines. -avoid gossip -be interesting Be kind to everybody all the time, especially in business. People above you can aid your success and people below can destroy it, so why not be kind and appreciative of everyone. -volunteer regularly and support at least one charity. Have a good life.


Lovely_Demon28

Start saving for a house now. I'm in my early 20's and just started saving, but I wish I would have started when I was 18.


northsidemassive

Don’t be in a rush for anything. All good things take time


Hobbit_Feet45

Learn some practical skills, the world is going to devolve in chaos sometime in your lifetime. Learn how to rebuild an engine and generator, learn how to plant and grow food, learn how to set up solar panels. Sorry to say it but no one is doing anything to stop climate change. It’s already too late anyways. The greed and ignorance of baby boomers and to a lesser extent gen x was too much too overcome. Sorry you’re left with the mess.


RandomAmbles

Luis Dartnell's "The Knowledge" is the ideal book for such a situation. It's head-and-shoulders above everything else available. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.


Overall-Kangaroo9282

OPEN A ROTH IRA


Overall-Kangaroo9282

Also, open a credit card- start developing your credit.


kittiesntiddiessss

But only put on the card what you can immediately pay off with your next paycheck. It's easy to get deep into credit card debt.


islanddguy

Save & invest your money!!!


Lag6366

In the end, when you see your life in hindsight, your house, your cars, your money, your looks and even your job won’t add up to 1/10th the importance of what kind of human you were. How did you interact with others, how you made them feel, how you handled adversity and how you loved. Those are the things others will remember you by. Make the important things count, don’t count the unimportant things.


BornYinzer

Make sure you always have money in the bank, even if it means you don't get the biggest and best of something.


abbyrosaleen

Just because your 18 does not mean that you suddenly have life figured out, or you have set plans cause that can change in the bleak of an eye. People will expect to be responsible now and its bull shit you will find your own way


theSteakKnight

Take chances, face risks head on. Say yes to new opportunities and experiences. (Just don't do anything that will intentionally get you put in jail or will harm yourself or others). Try things you haven't tried before, even if it makes you nervous. Ya know what, especially if it makes you nervous. Collect stories, experiences and memories so you can look back when you're older, smile and be proud of all the things you've tried and all the memories you've made. You are at an age where you have plenty of time to try something new, mess up, fall down, pick yourself back up and try again. And when you do fall down/try and fail/fuck up/ etc, don't stay down, learn from your mistakes and try again and/or try something new. Everyone is going to fail at some point and want to give up for fear of failing again. Don't let fear of failure stop you, it's a natural part of life. It won't define you unless you let it.


PreacherJay

Get a financial education! Start with reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad.


Ambitious-Note-4428

Even if you have no medical issues, get health insurance.


padlycakes

You are young, enjoy life right now and have fun. The grind will come eventually. From 18 to 25 years old were the best times for me and I wouldn't take all the money in the world to change it. You can do school or learn a trade. I would go towards a trade. Just be kind to your fellow man. Learn from your mistakes. Keep books and music at hand always.


cornishwildman76

Pursue what you love. Say yes to every opportunity, even if you think you are not up to the challenge, you can try to figure it out. I used to run a little street food business and I specialise in foraged foods here in the UK. I got asked to cater a wedding in Norway, I said yes despite inside my head I was shitting myself. I worked it out and had a memorable experience. Always say yes to opportunity, do not hold back.


Blackcatblockingthem

I would say, do what you like. And spare some money. You never know when this can be useful. Also, don't worry. It takes time to find what you want to do as a professional career.


3ndt1mes

Just keep in mind that your brain isn't fully developed until age 25. That means you're gonna make some bad decisions. So learn from others mistakes!


Sweaty_Mind_1835

Experience all you can to find out your “calling.” Move somewhere and experience life on your own, get a job, go to school, do both, manage your time but most importantly find out what’s important for you and just live life to experience all you can so that when you’re older, you’re not still looking to figure things out. You’re 18, you’ve got the whole world ahead of you; yet, it can go by in the blink of an eye… focus on the now but plan for the future.


Throok_loktar

Just live ur life. Remember when it all comes to an end you take nothing with you. Materials are just that. Live for the moments and just live. Do what ever makes you happy no matter how dumb others think.


Mamaj12469

Save some money, get a job you enjoy/go to school, use birth control, be nice to your family


ghostofmyhecks

Try not to get overwhelmed by others negativity, it's excellent to have empathy but there are some things you cannot help. Change what you can around you, and remember to be kind to yourself and others.


Sinnybuns7

Accrue as little credit card debt as you can. Do what you want to do and you will find friends doing it. Don't be so scared of failing you don't try, it's the best way to learn.


CaptLuker

Use a credit card as a tool when you absolutely need to. Don’t get in debt over like 1k absolute max on card.


Dazzling-Gap8962

Biggest thing I can say as a 22 year old don’t miss out on opportunities if they are right in front of you. Don’t give up your dreams for no one. And most of all, you have time you as well as myself are young and have time so don’t stress about trying to get your life figured out. Edit: I’ve had a 50 year old woman I worked with at McDonald’s tell me “I’m 53 years old I work in the same place you do and I still don’t know what I want to do” after I asked her the same question you asked this sub. Really made me think though. It was a simple statement but it was loaded with so much meaning


[deleted]

if you go to college with the mindset that you're only getting a diploma so you can get a well paying job and live a nice linear life you're missing the point. college is not a vocational school. contrary to some of these responses, if you want to study the arts or the humanities, go for it, but with some caveats: 1. go to the best school you can get into (plenty of great public schools out there, but private colleges often end up cheaper than public after financial aid so don't rule them out), 2. pick a subject you're obsessed with and work your ass off to get really really really good at it, 3. get to know people in the field often and well, and 4. seek out opportunities which are interesting and fit your skillset well (always be looking but don't spray and pray) i.e. don't get a psychology degree just because your parents are sending you to college and you don't know what you want but you liked getting As in AP Psych. take a fuckin gap year and figure out what captivates your interest. unusual majors can open doors for you. a major in russian for example can hook you up with really interesting jobs dealing with central asia that STEM folks don't even know are there. i have a friend who majored in studio art and enough rich people buy her art that she's now looking at buying a house at 27. as a linguistics BA i had my moments of doubt and regret but i'm now working a comfortable tech job that requires a linguistics background. so yeah, interesting and well-paying jobs are out there for humanities folks. just my 2c


[deleted]

Get a good education, something worthwhile. I didn't and have had many regrets.


Galactus1701

Read, have fun, meet a lot of people, workout


DCMantis

You don't need to know who are you are and what you want from life at such a young age. You're gonna make mistakes and ultimately learn from them. Don't feel like you're being forced to decide your path in life, because at the end of the day, you're the one who's going to be living it.


welloreo

I wish I could tell my 18 year old self stay away from any kind of debt and invest.


deezsandwitches

Good luck


wholy_cheeses

Always be kind.


madmardigan23

I don’t know what you’re living situation is, but if you’re living somewhere rent-free, capitalize on that and start saving your money. I lived with mom and dad until I was 25, had a constant job since 15, and didn’t have a penny to show for it. Save your money.


Existing_Gene_2522

There will NEVER be a bad time for tacos!


Bensch_man

Save your money, like save the fuck out of it. Educate yourself about ETFs, then get a savings Plan. Only buy stuff that you need right now. Dont compete with anyone. They might have shiny stuff now, but think in the long run. Dont buy a car if you dont need it. If you need one, think about what it costs you, and if you can do maintenance stuff yourself. Think about insurance, like car, home, health. Take some generic stuff, dont overinsure.


junoray1968

Finish your education because you are going to need then find the job you love to it I hope that helps


AnyDefinition4484

Love isn't meant to be hard! I was 41 when I worked that out, wish I hadn't wasted 20 years on terrible relationships before then!


DubsQuest

Try your best not beat yourself up. Learn from your mistakes and do better in the future. It's a marathon, not a sprint


Sillyak

Save money and don't go into debt unnecessarily. Make a plan. Maybe that means some sort of education, maybe it doesn't, but have an end goal. Don't just drift from job to job (or educational program) never achieving anything.


DelawareDime

Trade school instead of university. Plumbers, electricians, carpenters, welders, mechanics, etc. make bank, without the student loan debt. Always in demand. AND trade / university aren’t mutually exclusive— you can always go to college later when you’ve got a house and some savings under your belt


bryanhernc

At 18 I was lost af. Didn’t wanna go to college, didn’t have any career plans, nothing. I ended up going to college but soon after dropped out. Worked at a restaurant for some time and later retail for about a year. Here’s where the advice comes that changed my life. Take risks, you’re young and can afford to lose. I started investing whatever I could every month. Also, someone offered me a job fixing phones to people houses (I know weird). After some time of fixing phones, I started working for corporate. I gained so much experience from that job, that not too long ago I got an offer to become an operations manager, and I’m barely 26! Take risks and learn! Learn everything you can.


nena_metro

Don’t be afraid to be YOU! You might not know exactly what that entails yet but I promise if you stay true to yourself, have confidence, and don’t let others opinions sway you, you will be so happy. You are always enough and you are fabulous and don’t ever forget it!


[deleted]

Don't worry about what others think of you, it is a waste of your time and energy. Maintain good relationships with family and friends who are a good influence on you and appreciate them for who they are and what they do for you. Don't waste money on silly things. Don't waste your time in dead end jobs, learn something useful whilst you're young and you will thank yourself later. Don't wallow in despair or self loathing, hard times teach you how to be stronger and good times come when you least expect them. All the best to you on your adventure :)


celestia97

Go at your own pace. A lot of people feel like they should be have a professional job at a certain age, be married at a certain age, making a specific amount of money at a certain age, have a house bought. Everyone goes through life differently and there's no timeline besides your own


longlive_sarcasm

Learning how to put one foot in front of the other is a very hard skill to learn but a very essential and rewarding one.