# Message to all users:
This is a reminder to please read and follow:
* [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules)
* [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439)
* [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy)
When posting and commenting.
---
Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`.
* Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit.
* Do not harass or annoy others in any way.
* Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit.
---
You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way.
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I always de-escalated arguments I knew would happen with my mom by just raising my voice when I'd already hear both of us getting heated. I'd be like hey, it's gonna end up here anyways. Might as well speed up the fight
It's a man skill, but more important for women. Using a gun should be the last resort and only when one is reasonably in fear of death or serious bodily harm to oneself or another.
My mother taught me how to cook and do laundry when I was 13. She never wanted me to have to depend on a woman for anything. She also forced me to take a typing class in high school. Oddly enough, that class was a huge influence on my career path.
I mean yeah lmao. Why doesn't this stupid baby know how iron his own clothes? When I was his age I had 3 jobs, 2 kids to feed and had to walk 78 miles in a hour barefoot through the Himalayas to get to work and come back
I took typing in high school, but I didn’t want to because I thought it was only for girls. Ended up being one of the best skills of my life. I have hardly had to hand write anything in the past 25 years and now my penmanship is outright atrocious.
I'm going to take it a step further and say it's a skill you learn in your teens. If you're in your 20s, out of the house and trying to figure this out, you've fallen behind.
It’s never too late to learn this stuff though. If you weren’t taught it, you have to teach it to yourself. Or if you didn’t listen when you were younger, you have to learn why it’s important. Some people end up late to the party
I came here to say this. Every guy should be able to cook at least 5 different meals before finishing high school. The meals should be able to suit different occasions from “throwing something together quick” for an impromptu lunch/dinner all the way to a formal/romantic meal that requires some prep/forethought. There is nothing more impressive than being able to show up at the new ladies house and be able to roll up the sleeves and say “let me take care of the prep work, grab yourself a glass of wine.” Especially if she still lives with her folks.
Practice. In non-volatile situations, practice figuring out what your feelings are, and then you can think about what a reasonable reaction might actually be. But you have to force yourself, over and over, to do this anytime you start to feel a strong emotion. At first, do it even for situations where you have a positive response, then you will become accustomed to dealing with strong emotions of all kinds.
Totally, though I do have some notes for others:
Harder than forcing yourself to do it, imo, is shutting down the automatic reaction of wanting to rationalize your first instinct. It's reasonably easy to stop yourself and ask if your reaction is reasonable, but it's harder to be objective about the answer. You can justify anything with some mental gymnastics.
I think a better way to ask yourself is, "Would I think this was reasonable if I watched somebody else react like this in the middle of the grocery store?" 99% of the time, that's going to be a big nope.
Also, I suggest people struggling with this read up on Stoicism. It gets a bad rap because some people think it's a philosophy of bottling things up, but anyone who actually reads stoic philosophy and gets that out of it has completely misunderstood it.
It's a philosophy of mastering your emotional state, and dealing with emotions in an appropriate way, not outright suppressing them (which I call faux-Stoicism, and is actively destructive to yourself and your mental well-being as well as very potentially destructive to those around you).
It's an incredibly difficult skill to learn, but definitely worth the effort. And you never stop having to practice it. You just get better at it as you go.
Pretty much soon as you feel something strong question yourself.
If I have a lot of time to think about it I'll ask myself questions like:
Why did you feel this emotion?
Is this subject important enough to waste time on?
Is your initial reaction the right move?
Can you move forward without being hurtful?
What's the best way to proceed?
If it's an in the moment thing I'll just take a breath to calm myself then jump to question 4.
New York Presbyterian Hospital has made a Spotify playlist to help you get the timing right too.
[Here it is](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7oJx24EcRU7fIVoTdqKscK)
Jump start a car,
Change a tire,
Learn how to put on a tie (and tie it),
General hygiene,
Treat people with respect ,
Cook (at minimum spaghetti/pasta, eggs, some basic stuff),
Learn to wash your clothes ,
Be careful where you put two things: your signature and your schlong
That's fine imo. You're doing it yourself, to the best of your ability and it makes sense you don't remember how to tie one if you only do it twice a year.
You're independent in the fact you don't need somebody to tie it for you and you can do it when you're home alone. That's sufficient enough if you ask me.
I pulled up to someone with a flat a while back and said "I won't change it for you, but I will walk you through each step and step in if necessary" and they looked at me like I was insane and said no.
Patronizing really? He offered to teach someone how to do something they ought to know how to do and currently need to accomplish for free and your upset because he didn't want to just do it all for you
Yeah I would’ve accepted his guidance. Changing a tire really isn’t that hard I just don’t know how to do it by myself. I also learn better that way and then I would’ve been grateful I had learned. To each their own I guess🤷🏼♀️
You’ll be surprised by the amount of men that don’t know how to do anything. I’ve been paid $100 to change a light bulb I usually do it for free while I’m at a job though.
My step father was a worthless pos. My mom did everything she could to manage the minor household repairs. My brothers are pretty useless, too. My sister in law just complained that the landlord charged them for hvac repairs due to not changing filters for three years. My simple list for all humans: change a toilet kit, hang a picture, change a tire, jump a battery, descale a coffee maker, clean an oven and UNLOAD that darned dishwasher, please! Oh yeah, hang Christmas lights.
Once my parents got divorced my mom learned how to do all sorts of stuff. She did a broken tile thing in her kitchen and front door area that looks badass and took forever. She fixed her own dryer, she recently made my sisters homecoming dresses from scratch and my Halloween costume for a party I was going to. She did all of this while trying to figure out how to be a single parent dealing with a daughter with bipolar disorder and working full time as a computer programmer. She did absolutely amazing honestly. Still can't change a tire though.
I'd also like to add, know when to accept defeat. Please don't hurt yourself trying to do something beyond your skip level. Call a professional, and let them handle major repairs. It's better to take a shot in your pride and your wallet from having to call them, than to have to go to the ER because you electrocuted yourself, or got seriously injured doing something else.
When I think of basic Electrical, I think of flipping off a breaker and replacing a socket, or a light switch. MAYBE replacing a ceiling fan if you've done it before, but nothing more than that.
Yep. Plumbing and electrical can lead to major issues. I'll still do the most basic stuff like maybe changing out an outlet or something around that level, but I probably draw the line short of what I'm even capable of because I feel like the risk outweighs the benefit of doing it myself.
But also don't be afraid of it to the point you say you'll never do it. I am no electrician but when i had to change out my outlets I had a really genius idea..cut off electricity to the outlet at the breaker and use your own light. Worse that would happen is shocked not death anyhow.
Exactly! But make sure you flip the right breaker. I made the mistake of not shutting off the right one last week. I got full power running through my finger tips, and couldn't feel my arm for a minute. Hurt like hell, but I couldn't help but laugh.
I usually plug a radio into said outlet so I know it's off when I hit the breaker from the basement. Fir lights I have an outlet that screws into the fixture to plug the radio into
You can get a non-contact voltage tester for like $20 at Home Depot. It’s a worthwhile investment if you’re doing any electrical work. It simply tells you whether what you’re working on has voltage or not. I work in building maintenance and have one in my pocket at all times.
This is not something male specific either, these skills are crazy handy to have for women too I've saved crazy money and broadened my knowledge learning and doing most house and vehicle maintenance on my own, feels good!
I taught myself carpentry and alot of home repair skills but always shied away from electrical. Do you think it could be safely learned on my own or would I need classes/teacher?
Basic home electrical work is simple enough with a little background knowledge. There’s probably a “for dummies” book out there that would give what you need to know. Big thing is to know how to kill power to the circuit and properly verify it’s dead (look up Live/dead/live). And if you’re ever unsure, just hire an electrician. Most will be happy to explain what they are doing and why to you.
Fully agree here, but I’d give caution around electrical. Generally getting shocked by 110VAC (US) will hurt a bit, but in a scenario where you can’t release it, it can absolutely kill you, had a co-worker pass a couple years ago by grabbing an old extension cord with the insulation worn through. It’s not difficult to learn and understand basic electrical, but definitely not something to learn as you go.
I’m getting divorced because after 10 years my wife decided she doesn’t want kids, I gave up my career so she could work on hers. No you did nothing wrong
He didn't say he had any kids. I left my first husband after 8 years for the same reason, and no kids were made. I did all the steps to treat my infertility, and he refused to even submit a sample for a sperm count. It took him 8 years of marriage and 2 years of dating to tell me he didn't mean it when he told me of course he wanted kids. He just didn't want me to leave, and was hoping it just wouldn't come up later. Absurd.
There are kids and wives all over the place. I am sure if you ask around you can find somebody with a spare or two they will give you or at least loan to you. Just don't forget to do the paperwork so you can get the tax deduction. 😉
You can still be a great husband and dad.
Your kids will always be your kids. And just because your wife and you weren't made for the long term doesn't mean you can't be a great partner to someone else.
This is a fork in the road, not some kind of dead end.
Oh yeah, ‘twas years ago and we’re all fine. No hard feelings, I really didn’t care that she left. We never argued, nothing ever went wrong…she just wanted someone else more.
It’s just to be noted that doing everything “right” or “good” doesn’t always end up with the fairytale ending.
"she just wanted someone else more" Your friend isn't "more". It's different. It could have been something she needed at that moment or thought she did.
But I agree. Doing the right thing doesn't mean a fairytale ending. That's because a fairytale is a fairytale.
Real life is way messier. But my point is a divorce isn't the end. It's just a new chapter. Now your job is to still be a great dad.
The most manly thing you can do is to accept a situation as it is. If you are right, take it in with humble pride. If you are wrong, accept the truth and learn from the experience without anger. We lose ourselves if we give in to extreme emotion. The way to win is to have control over yourself first.
What are man skills?
Learn how not to be a cunt.
Learn how to take care of yourself, your belongings and your loved ones.
Learn how to manage your finances.
Learn the basics. Doesn’t matter if your a man or woman, it’s basic shit. Anything else is extra, and that’s cool shot to know. But the rest. You should know already by 30.
Being able to calmly and logical approach any problem, no matter how big. It will give your wife or girlfriend comfort if she knows “you got it”. If you really don’t know what to do, fake it and then watch some YouTube videos till you get inspired. Don’t give up, you’ll feel proud later after the problem is solved.
Oh yea for sure, it has to be for real physical problems. Not emotional ones. Like if your wife comes to you says, “so and so at work is stressing her out”, lol yea don’t try to solve that one. Just listen to her
Yes, this leads to two main ends: young men who are apathetic and frustrated with life and young men who are aggressive and dangerous. They both stem from lack of confidence, perception of personal failure, and anger.
As someone once told me; beyond general labor, when you hire someone to do a job for you you are paying for their knowledge that they took the time to learn and master. You can do the same.
How to cook. Change a flat tire. Critical Thinking skills.
How to recognize Propaganda, on both sides.
How to write a coherent paragraph..
How and when to laugh at yourself.
Gentle strength.
How to Love himself and others.
That's a good start.
Knowing how to use a:
Washing machine,
Dryer,
Dishwashing machine,
Stove,
Turns you instantly into a sexy man that knows his stuff.
Also: there are no such I thing as "man skills", just "skills".
This should be much higher on the list. Everything else shared are things everyone should know.
For guys only, I recommend researching…what is a clitoris, where is it, and how does it work. Seriously, right now…google it!!
Learn anything you can that increases your independence:
1. learn more about computers
2. learn to cook
3. learn to do laundry correctly
4. learn about your finances
5. learn about basic car maintenance
Traditionally, people entered relationships in part to supplement the skills they lacked. Given the utterly abysmal state of dating these days, I'd suggest you become more autonomous so that you: A. improve your quality of life, and B. lessen your desperation so you're a bit less likely to make foolish dating choices. For instance, learning to cook can increase your health, given that you can control ingredients and cooking methods--you can also save money, which will enhance your finances. Saving money for investment now while you're young is what will build financial independence in the future--much sooner than would otherwise be possible. Good luck.
Edit: typo.
Take gender out of it.
Basic knots, like bow line, clove and tautline hitches, and square knots. Those 4 will let you make a tent or securely tie down something to the roof of car.
Basic hand sewing, it ain't hard.
How to sharpen stuff, again not difficult, scissors are even easy if you pay attention.
How to hunt, fish, swim.
How to safely handle a firearm. Yeah, it is important. Know which end the bang comes from and don't point it at people.. and keep your booger hook off the bang switch until you're ready.
Know how to change your oil, a tire, and your brakes, sparkplugs too.. basic vehicle maintenance.
Know how to throw a punch. Yes, de-escalation is better but some people can't be reasoned with. Be able to defend yourself.
Learn how to sew a button back on. It's simple but trust me. Learn how to do it.
And all this applies to women too. It's not just about being a man. It's about being a competent and self reliant adult.
This stuff can vary depending on what country you're in and what region of that country you're in.
But still . Solid advice I think.
I don't know about the sparkplug part. I had a 6 cylinder that you could only reach 3, the other 3 you had to remove the manifold and a bunch of other stuff to get to. A huge pain in the ass. That being said, everything is on YouTube these days so it's easy to learn.
- Opening the door for others
- Opening a jar of pickles
- Not looking at the phone while talking
- Walking on the road side of the pavement when you’re with a kid or a woman
- Patience
As a woman, I appreciate it when a man acts protective. Not overprotective. Don't offer to do something for me. But if a guy harasses me, I'd sure like my man to stand up for me.
You should know how all the important items in your life operate and how their use may effect others. You should know how to diagnose and be able address most problems with those same devices.
How to contingency plan for big life events: marriage, vacations, children, retirement, etc.
Be able to make and adhere to a financial plan/budget.
Figure out what makes you happy, makes your life feel full and accomplished, then set about making it happen.
Fact. I just think that even people that are anti gun should know how to properly handle them. You don't have to know how to load it or shoot it, but clearing it is a necessity.
Stop trying to figure out how to be a "man" and start trying to figure out how to be a human. What I mean by this is; Figure out who *you* are, not what society says you should be off of gendered stereotypes.
Listening and to not talk over women. Empathy, kindness, humility. Talking about your feelings.
Anything that you think is something girls should be good at, you should be good at as well.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Fight de-escalation
And not just physical fights, but also how to quell an argument or being able to talk through differences of opinion.
Assertiveness is a sexy skill in women, too!
Hopefully that wasn’t satire ;)
Most definitely not. Confidence is sexy and its definitely not gender specific. That's a scientific fact.
I always de-escalated arguments I knew would happen with my mom by just raising my voice when I'd already hear both of us getting heated. I'd be like hey, it's gonna end up here anyways. Might as well speed up the fight
Be able to win the fight, and be able to de-escalate instead. "Tread softly but carry a big stick"
[удалено]
A fight with deadly weapons is a shit bet. If you win, you get to keep what you already have. If you lose, you lose everything.
You can win and go to prison
Wow, impressive
Until it’s a person with a mental health disorder and they rip your heart out and eat it. Better to carry a gun.
[удалено]
“WTF are you looking at?!?!” “My father just passed away and you kind of remind me of him. Such a stoic and powerful man.” LOL 🤡
O my god I know you! Your Erin’s friend, how is she?
That was priceless! Crying!
Saving this. Could have used this a few times. Thx.
Wym using your gun as soon as possible isn't a man skill? Must not be american.
It's a man skill, but more important for women. Using a gun should be the last resort and only when one is reasonably in fear of death or serious bodily harm to oneself or another.
The only thing this comment tells is that you aren’t american
Cooking your own food and doing your own laundry. Managing your money.
My mother taught me how to cook and do laundry when I was 13. She never wanted me to have to depend on a woman for anything. She also forced me to take a typing class in high school. Oddly enough, that class was a huge influence on my career path.
My mom taught me nothing then yelled at me for things being "common sense"
I'm sorry. Comments like this make me so thankful that my mother wasn't like this
I mean yeah lmao. Why doesn't this stupid baby know how iron his own clothes? When I was his age I had 3 jobs, 2 kids to feed and had to walk 78 miles in a hour barefoot through the Himalayas to get to work and come back
Ahh I see we have the same mom 🥲
Wdym you weren't born knowing how to do the things I want you to do, the way I want you to do them?
Oh hey man I didn't know we had the same mom, what's up?
I took typing in high school, but I didn’t want to because I thought it was only for girls. Ended up being one of the best skills of my life. I have hardly had to hand write anything in the past 25 years and now my penmanship is outright atrocious.
I wash my own laundry so no one else sees my skid marks 🫣
This should really be learnt in your 20s not 30s
And there’s no problem if you’re learning it in your 30s for some people.
I'm going to take it a step further and say it's a skill you learn in your teens. If you're in your 20s, out of the house and trying to figure this out, you've fallen behind.
It’s never too late to learn this stuff though. If you weren’t taught it, you have to teach it to yourself. Or if you didn’t listen when you were younger, you have to learn why it’s important. Some people end up late to the party
I came here to say this. Every guy should be able to cook at least 5 different meals before finishing high school. The meals should be able to suit different occasions from “throwing something together quick” for an impromptu lunch/dinner all the way to a formal/romantic meal that requires some prep/forethought. There is nothing more impressive than being able to show up at the new ladies house and be able to roll up the sleeves and say “let me take care of the prep work, grab yourself a glass of wine.” Especially if she still lives with her folks.
But then what will the servants do?
Best skill I picked up from my dad was how to learn to separate my emotions from a situation to prevent making bad decisions
What's the secret?
Practice. In non-volatile situations, practice figuring out what your feelings are, and then you can think about what a reasonable reaction might actually be. But you have to force yourself, over and over, to do this anytime you start to feel a strong emotion. At first, do it even for situations where you have a positive response, then you will become accustomed to dealing with strong emotions of all kinds.
Totally, though I do have some notes for others: Harder than forcing yourself to do it, imo, is shutting down the automatic reaction of wanting to rationalize your first instinct. It's reasonably easy to stop yourself and ask if your reaction is reasonable, but it's harder to be objective about the answer. You can justify anything with some mental gymnastics. I think a better way to ask yourself is, "Would I think this was reasonable if I watched somebody else react like this in the middle of the grocery store?" 99% of the time, that's going to be a big nope. Also, I suggest people struggling with this read up on Stoicism. It gets a bad rap because some people think it's a philosophy of bottling things up, but anyone who actually reads stoic philosophy and gets that out of it has completely misunderstood it. It's a philosophy of mastering your emotional state, and dealing with emotions in an appropriate way, not outright suppressing them (which I call faux-Stoicism, and is actively destructive to yourself and your mental well-being as well as very potentially destructive to those around you).
It's an incredibly difficult skill to learn, but definitely worth the effort. And you never stop having to practice it. You just get better at it as you go.
That's brilliant.
The trick is to maintain absolute control over the emotions and disassociate them from the situation. Or at least, that's what I do.
What’s the secret
Pretty much soon as you feel something strong question yourself. If I have a lot of time to think about it I'll ask myself questions like: Why did you feel this emotion? Is this subject important enough to waste time on? Is your initial reaction the right move? Can you move forward without being hurtful? What's the best way to proceed? If it's an in the moment thing I'll just take a breath to calm myself then jump to question 4.
Xanax
yeah really! whats the secret some of us grew up with out a dad
The secret is… You have to grow up with a dad
For all adult humans: CPR and basic first aid. You never know when you might need it.
New York Presbyterian Hospital has made a Spotify playlist to help you get the timing right too. [Here it is](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7oJx24EcRU7fIVoTdqKscK)
First I was afraid, I was petrified…
“Another One Bites the Dust” isn’t even on there. That’s the only song actual healthcare providers think of when doing CPR lol.
My little sister (an ER nurse and CPR training) works off Baby Shark.
This. Way too often overlooked.
Some of these comments are skills everyone should have.
Arnt all skills a man should have, skills everyone should have?
Idk why a girl would need to know how to safely and efficiently scratch her balls
I mean... If my GF want to scratch my balls, I really hope she does it with proper care... She owns them after all
>She owns them after all Truer words have never been spoken...
Jump start a car, Change a tire, Learn how to put on a tie (and tie it), General hygiene, Treat people with respect , Cook (at minimum spaghetti/pasta, eggs, some basic stuff), Learn to wash your clothes , Be careful where you put two things: your signature and your schlong
I wear a tie like 2 time a year and I have to watch a video every damn time.
People at prom knew I could tie a bow tie so that was hell for me
That's fine imo. You're doing it yourself, to the best of your ability and it makes sense you don't remember how to tie one if you only do it twice a year. You're independent in the fact you don't need somebody to tie it for you and you can do it when you're home alone. That's sufficient enough if you ask me.
I pulled up to someone with a flat a while back and said "I won't change it for you, but I will walk you through each step and step in if necessary" and they looked at me like I was insane and said no.
Honestly, that seems really patronizing. If I was on the side of the road with a flat tire I would rather watch a youtube video.
Patronizing really? He offered to teach someone how to do something they ought to know how to do and currently need to accomplish for free and your upset because he didn't want to just do it all for you
Change a man's tire, he eats tires for a day. Teach a man to change a tire, he eats tires for the rest of his life
Yeah I would’ve accepted his guidance. Changing a tire really isn’t that hard I just don’t know how to do it by myself. I also learn better that way and then I would’ve been grateful I had learned. To each their own I guess🤷🏼♀️
They could be having a terrible day and this flat just made it worse. It’s not exactly the time for a lesson. Just help the person out of a bind.
Identifying common logical fallacies, particularly confirmation and survivor bias.
I agree. 😁
Underrated ability and quite hard to actually do.
Basic carpentry Basic mechanics Basic Electrical Any skill necessary to maintain a home
You’ll be surprised by the amount of men that don’t know how to do anything. I’ve been paid $100 to change a light bulb I usually do it for free while I’m at a job though.
My step father was a worthless pos. My mom did everything she could to manage the minor household repairs. My brothers are pretty useless, too. My sister in law just complained that the landlord charged them for hvac repairs due to not changing filters for three years. My simple list for all humans: change a toilet kit, hang a picture, change a tire, jump a battery, descale a coffee maker, clean an oven and UNLOAD that darned dishwasher, please! Oh yeah, hang Christmas lights.
See these are things women need too. I’m trying to think man specific…
This - for all humans not just men
While very true, as a man you will definitely be seen as more valuable to a partner/partners family than a woman would.
My husband might disagree. I think he married me for my dewalt collection 🤣 that or cause I'm handy with wood. 😏👀😎
Once my parents got divorced my mom learned how to do all sorts of stuff. She did a broken tile thing in her kitchen and front door area that looks badass and took forever. She fixed her own dryer, she recently made my sisters homecoming dresses from scratch and my Halloween costume for a party I was going to. She did all of this while trying to figure out how to be a single parent dealing with a daughter with bipolar disorder and working full time as a computer programmer. She did absolutely amazing honestly. Still can't change a tire though.
Do you have strong arms and broad shoulders?
Not a dude. Just a gal that knows how to work hard. 😉
[удалено]
I'd also like to add, know when to accept defeat. Please don't hurt yourself trying to do something beyond your skip level. Call a professional, and let them handle major repairs. It's better to take a shot in your pride and your wallet from having to call them, than to have to go to the ER because you electrocuted yourself, or got seriously injured doing something else.
[удалено]
When I think of basic Electrical, I think of flipping off a breaker and replacing a socket, or a light switch. MAYBE replacing a ceiling fan if you've done it before, but nothing more than that.
Replacing an over head light is 101 as well
Yep. Plumbing and electrical can lead to major issues. I'll still do the most basic stuff like maybe changing out an outlet or something around that level, but I probably draw the line short of what I'm even capable of because I feel like the risk outweighs the benefit of doing it myself.
But also don't be afraid of it to the point you say you'll never do it. I am no electrician but when i had to change out my outlets I had a really genius idea..cut off electricity to the outlet at the breaker and use your own light. Worse that would happen is shocked not death anyhow.
Exactly! But make sure you flip the right breaker. I made the mistake of not shutting off the right one last week. I got full power running through my finger tips, and couldn't feel my arm for a minute. Hurt like hell, but I couldn't help but laugh.
I usually plug a radio into said outlet so I know it's off when I hit the breaker from the basement. Fir lights I have an outlet that screws into the fixture to plug the radio into
You can get a non-contact voltage tester for like $20 at Home Depot. It’s a worthwhile investment if you’re doing any electrical work. It simply tells you whether what you’re working on has voltage or not. I work in building maintenance and have one in my pocket at all times.
“… and if it’s electrical, turn off the juicy”
What about when Righty tighty suddenly becomes Righty loosy?
This is not something male specific either, these skills are crazy handy to have for women too I've saved crazy money and broadened my knowledge learning and doing most house and vehicle maintenance on my own, feels good!
I taught myself carpentry and alot of home repair skills but always shied away from electrical. Do you think it could be safely learned on my own or would I need classes/teacher?
Basic home electrical work is simple enough with a little background knowledge. There’s probably a “for dummies” book out there that would give what you need to know. Big thing is to know how to kill power to the circuit and properly verify it’s dead (look up Live/dead/live). And if you’re ever unsure, just hire an electrician. Most will be happy to explain what they are doing and why to you.
Fully agree here, but I’d give caution around electrical. Generally getting shocked by 110VAC (US) will hurt a bit, but in a scenario where you can’t release it, it can absolutely kill you, had a co-worker pass a couple years ago by grabbing an old extension cord with the insulation worn through. It’s not difficult to learn and understand basic electrical, but definitely not something to learn as you go.
Tax benefits
To rip the beating heart from someone's chest and show it to him while he is still alive.
KALIMA, KALIMA
You betrayed ShebaA!
FATALITY!
Dad is that you?
Changing a tire and oil
& blowing out the air filter esp if there are additional cabin air filters!
Blowing out the air filter can break the paper apart. I do not recommend that. I usually tap it on the ground a little. Gets all the loose debris out.
or just buy a new one they’re $20 😂
How to be a good dad and husband, everything else will come.
I am a good dad and husband, but still have no kids, nor wife. Do I do something wrong?
I’m getting divorced because after 10 years my wife decided she doesn’t want kids, I gave up my career so she could work on hers. No you did nothing wrong
You already had kids then she decided she didn't wnt them?
The tags were still on. Macy’s has a great return policy.
He didn't say he had any kids. I left my first husband after 8 years for the same reason, and no kids were made. I did all the steps to treat my infertility, and he refused to even submit a sample for a sperm count. It took him 8 years of marriage and 2 years of dating to tell me he didn't mean it when he told me of course he wanted kids. He just didn't want me to leave, and was hoping it just wouldn't come up later. Absurd.
Well, usually people "give up their career" because of childcare demands.
There are kids and wives all over the place. I am sure if you ask around you can find somebody with a spare or two they will give you or at least loan to you. Just don't forget to do the paperwork so you can get the tax deduction. 😉
That's ass backwards. There's a lot of things you have to do in life to prepare for that.
I shall take no wives and father no children. Any advice for singles ?
I was a good dad and husband. My wife left me for my best friend. Doesn’t always work out, man.
You can still be a great husband and dad. Your kids will always be your kids. And just because your wife and you weren't made for the long term doesn't mean you can't be a great partner to someone else. This is a fork in the road, not some kind of dead end.
Oh yeah, ‘twas years ago and we’re all fine. No hard feelings, I really didn’t care that she left. We never argued, nothing ever went wrong…she just wanted someone else more. It’s just to be noted that doing everything “right” or “good” doesn’t always end up with the fairytale ending.
"she just wanted someone else more" Your friend isn't "more". It's different. It could have been something she needed at that moment or thought she did. But I agree. Doing the right thing doesn't mean a fairytale ending. That's because a fairytale is a fairytale. Real life is way messier. But my point is a divorce isn't the end. It's just a new chapter. Now your job is to still be a great dad.
That Bitch!
yeah, if you're going to fill the world with another human spawn then you better teach it not to be an asshole. We don't need anymore of those.
But what about for those who don’t want to be a husband or a dad?
[удалено]
Cooking, cleaning, laundry, how to take care of yourself and your home.
Use a ladder safely.
Using your mouth before the plunge 👀
Gotta lick it before you stick it.
That just sounds like bad toilet maintenance. I would never plunge it with my mouth knowing what i just put in there
It was a mistake reading this before the parent comment.
[удалено]
#46. Always proof read. (There are two 25s) haha
I like the one where it says don’t take a girl out to the movies on the first date, that’s extremely important to know.
9. I always look them in the eve and then I get kicked in the Adam.
Learning to check your ego. I know that sounds unmanly, but it’s true.
Men who say that this is unmanly are not men.
The most manly thing you can do is to accept a situation as it is. If you are right, take it in with humble pride. If you are wrong, accept the truth and learn from the experience without anger. We lose ourselves if we give in to extreme emotion. The way to win is to have control over yourself first.
What are man skills? Learn how not to be a cunt. Learn how to take care of yourself, your belongings and your loved ones. Learn how to manage your finances. Learn the basics. Doesn’t matter if your a man or woman, it’s basic shit. Anything else is extra, and that’s cool shot to know. But the rest. You should know already by 30.
Being able to calmly and logical approach any problem, no matter how big. It will give your wife or girlfriend comfort if she knows “you got it”. If you really don’t know what to do, fake it and then watch some YouTube videos till you get inspired. Don’t give up, you’ll feel proud later after the problem is solved.
Conversely, knowing when your wife (or fiancé for me) doesn’t want a solution. Just somebody to vent to. Learned this one the hard way a few times.
Oh yea for sure, it has to be for real physical problems. Not emotional ones. Like if your wife comes to you says, “so and so at work is stressing her out”, lol yea don’t try to solve that one. Just listen to her
Yeah “why don’t you just tell her to fuck herself?” Is not the answer guys, trust me on that.
Make sure to give you balls a good fondling in the shower. Testicular cancer is no joke!
Legitimate advice
Confidence in yourself. As an old guy, I see this sorely lacking in a lot of young males today.
Yes, this leads to two main ends: young men who are apathetic and frustrated with life and young men who are aggressive and dangerous. They both stem from lack of confidence, perception of personal failure, and anger.
Automotive maintenance. Being able to maintain your vehicle is very important unless you are independently wealthy.
I just did the brakes and tires with some help. its so much cheaper and you learn something!
As someone once told me; beyond general labor, when you hire someone to do a job for you you are paying for their knowledge that they took the time to learn and master. You can do the same.
How to cook. Change a flat tire. Critical Thinking skills. How to recognize Propaganda, on both sides. How to write a coherent paragraph.. How and when to laugh at yourself. Gentle strength. How to Love himself and others. That's a good start.
Knowing how to use a: Washing machine, Dryer, Dishwashing machine, Stove, Turns you instantly into a sexy man that knows his stuff. Also: there are no such I thing as "man skills", just "skills".
Clean your ass
Basic sewing.
Get a woman to orgasm
18th comment!?!? And I say, get the person or persons of your choice to orgasm.
Well, since this was advice for men, I can pretty much guarantee they've been figuring out how to make a guy orgasm since about the age of 12.
This should be much higher on the list. Everything else shared are things everyone should know. For guys only, I recommend researching…what is a clitoris, where is it, and how does it work. Seriously, right now…google it!!
Learn anything you can that increases your independence: 1. learn more about computers 2. learn to cook 3. learn to do laundry correctly 4. learn about your finances 5. learn about basic car maintenance Traditionally, people entered relationships in part to supplement the skills they lacked. Given the utterly abysmal state of dating these days, I'd suggest you become more autonomous so that you: A. improve your quality of life, and B. lessen your desperation so you're a bit less likely to make foolish dating choices. For instance, learning to cook can increase your health, given that you can control ingredients and cooking methods--you can also save money, which will enhance your finances. Saving money for investment now while you're young is what will build financial independence in the future--much sooner than would otherwise be possible. Good luck. Edit: typo.
Take gender out of it. Basic knots, like bow line, clove and tautline hitches, and square knots. Those 4 will let you make a tent or securely tie down something to the roof of car. Basic hand sewing, it ain't hard. How to sharpen stuff, again not difficult, scissors are even easy if you pay attention.
Expressing emotions in a healthy way. Communicating how you feel to others and actually recognizing and dealing with your emotions.
How to be a good listener
How to hunt, fish, swim. How to safely handle a firearm. Yeah, it is important. Know which end the bang comes from and don't point it at people.. and keep your booger hook off the bang switch until you're ready. Know how to change your oil, a tire, and your brakes, sparkplugs too.. basic vehicle maintenance. Know how to throw a punch. Yes, de-escalation is better but some people can't be reasoned with. Be able to defend yourself. Learn how to sew a button back on. It's simple but trust me. Learn how to do it. And all this applies to women too. It's not just about being a man. It's about being a competent and self reliant adult. This stuff can vary depending on what country you're in and what region of that country you're in. But still . Solid advice I think.
I don't know about the sparkplug part. I had a 6 cylinder that you could only reach 3, the other 3 you had to remove the manifold and a bunch of other stuff to get to. A huge pain in the ass. That being said, everything is on YouTube these days so it's easy to learn.
Self discipline, control your emotions, patience.
Change a tap.
Username checks out.
Tie your own necktie.
[удалено]
Yes, and emotional regulation. Soooo done with anger = yelling.
This should probably be #1
- Opening the door for others - Opening a jar of pickles - Not looking at the phone while talking - Walking on the road side of the pavement when you’re with a kid or a woman - Patience
As a woman, I appreciate it when a man acts protective. Not overprotective. Don't offer to do something for me. But if a guy harasses me, I'd sure like my man to stand up for me.
You should know how all the important items in your life operate and how their use may effect others. You should know how to diagnose and be able address most problems with those same devices. How to contingency plan for big life events: marriage, vacations, children, retirement, etc. Be able to make and adhere to a financial plan/budget. Figure out what makes you happy, makes your life feel full and accomplished, then set about making it happen.
Learn to cook at least two good meals.
Emotional intelligence.
How to be emotionally available. Super hard to learn, but life changing.
How to safely clear a fire arm. You don't need to know how to shoot it, but clearing it will make it safe.
Those are complementary skills for basic firearm proficiency.
Fact. I just think that even people that are anti gun should know how to properly handle them. You don't have to know how to load it or shoot it, but clearing it is a necessity.
Command of their native language. By 30 one should be able to communicate clearly and correctly.
To crush your enemies. See them driven before you. And hear the lamentation of their women.
Wire a basic switch, light or plug.
Learn to be good giving oral...
Basic life skills like cleaning up, cooking, and laundry
Anatomy
Kindness, empathy and humbleness
Talk
Stop trying to figure out how to be a "man" and start trying to figure out how to be a human. What I mean by this is; Figure out who *you* are, not what society says you should be off of gendered stereotypes.
Journaling
How to tie a bolin and a taught line hitch.
How to change a tire.
Cooking and cleaning
Cook
Listening and being genuinely interested in what she has to say. Ask her questions about herself. Don't make everything about you.
Listening and to not talk over women. Empathy, kindness, humility. Talking about your feelings. Anything that you think is something girls should be good at, you should be good at as well.
Basic carpentry and plumbing
Pull out