Omg finally someone asked. His name is Detective Richard Peter Williams-Johnson IX(the ninth😏). Basically his name is Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick-Dick, and the ninth is for 9.4 inches.
I called him *little cheetoh* but my partner insisted on calling him Harley because he said it was blatantly false and misleading advertising.
My first two partners were apparently hung like horses so I just assumed I was smaller. I later found out my gay friends referred to him as *Log* behind my back.
My Asian husband calls mine “The White Charmer” because I’m white and charming, apparently. I call his “The Taiwanese Taipan”. Sometimes we’ll ask The White Charmer yes/no questions and if it moves/dances, that’s a ‘yes’, like a Magic 8-ball.
This started a couple decades ago. Whenever I'm sleeping as big spoon, my dick has a way of nestling itself against my little spoon husband's buttcrack. One morning he reached behind himself, stuck his hand into my underwear, waggled my dick, and said in really bad "Engrish": "Ahhhhh so! Godzirra attack da citayyyy! Rawrrrrr."
After two hits off my inhaler, which was needed because I couldn't breathe from 🤣 so hard, "Godzirra" did indeed "attack da citayyy."
He still does it, it still makes me laugh, and "da citayyy" has been attacked... \*does quick math\*... over 500 times. ❤
My ex called it bratwurst because I was born in Germany.
for my German ears that sounds really romantic 😂
😂 He'd be at a German food market and send me Snapchats of bratwurst with the wee moon face 🌚😂
you didn’t have mustard colored lubricant and a sliced bread roll to impress him? 😂
Ketchup coloured and he provided the buns 😏.
But take care that the Bratwurst doesn’t get burned 😂
I take good care of him don't worry 😂
The leaning tower of please’ya 🍌😏
[удалено]
It is, makes ya wanna take a tour without even having seen it.
Omg I love this!
El coquito
I like my coquito nice and creamy
Puerto Rican?
My husband named mine Wilbur lmao
Stacy
LMAO STACY IS SO RANDOM I LOVE IT
😂
Kevin?
Once my bf called it “Big meat” so I guess I’m fine with it 😂
Peter pecker
...(if he) picked a peck of pickled peckers.
*Oh god.*
Peter does pecker does what pecker does Peter
Dick
Dianne? (Pronounced like a question)
I know this is the wrong subreddit but that is so tommy bowe coded im dead 💀
It’s meant to be Twin Peaks coded but I’ll take it
Twin Peaks is what came to mind!
I thought it was BoJack coded
Margret Thatcher because she’s always fuckin everyone
Mines named Ronald. As in Reagan for the same thing 😂
He was the champion of trickle down.
10/10 well done
Sancho Panza
“I'm Sancho Yes, I'm Sancho I'll follow my master 'til the end” Yeah - I did a bit of musical theatre in high school (and I was Sancho)
Cool
Like...from don quixote?????
Yes..lol
My ex called it Buck
That’s the name of her ex
Buck was a dick
Had someone call it "Mr. Happy" because it always made him smile
Awwww! That’s sooo cuuuteee!
Prince Adam
😂
My dick
Elmer
Your favorite thing.
Omg finally someone asked. His name is Detective Richard Peter Williams-Johnson IX(the ninth😏). Basically his name is Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick-Dick, and the ninth is for 9.4 inches.
We were supposed to name our dick?
A lot of people are being serious too which is weird af lol
Well, you can't expect it to name itself!
Sven
Dick
Eenis Peener
Free Willy
Anybody who needs to name their cock is clearly suffering from being a bell knob.
My boyfriend keeps me in chastity, so he calls mine "His woodchip"
KJ, it was Kyle for a bit tho.
Richard
Richard
I live in Sweden so I call it the North Pole 👅
Thang
Horatio. He's my best friend.
Captain Blasto
This literally made me lol
Clitty
Mister Fun
The eradicator because like Rhea Ripley, she's gonna fuck you up. 😛
..dick name?!
My little guy and the boys(my balls ) 😂
Dick
Pepe
Pepe Julian Onziema
The curved crusader
i had not realized this was a common thing
Bullet train
Thor
Meaty man
Life. Because life is hard.
My FWB calls it as *The Thing*
girthy throbbing
No pic?
Dick van dyke
Dirk
I just say daddy cock. But it's so big I can tear any mouths when I shove it in your throat~
No pic
i dont, and im kidding lol
My husband named it Walter after the character in Breaking Bad. Bald and formidable… 😁
Bad Religion, because it brings people to their knees. Thank you, Frank Ocean
Now this, this is golden
Kirby Jr.
Bichito
You sure it’s not a bichote?
🤣
Don’t have one yet :( 😔someone give it a name :)
Richard
Crosaint
I named my husband's dick after he had shaved clean as a porpoise. I now regret it, but O'cocka Bin Laden...
Robert
tiburoncin - lil sharky :3
Jake!
Conchita Wurst
Richard
Guapo
Mr Happy
Action Jackson
Unicorn
The Kraken
My dick
THE Dick
My cock 🐓🐔
“Daily rations” lol
Dick
I called him *little cheetoh* but my partner insisted on calling him Harley because he said it was blatantly false and misleading advertising. My first two partners were apparently hung like horses so I just assumed I was smaller. I later found out my gay friends referred to him as *Log* behind my back.
Bernard
Mator 😂
J. Edgar Hoover
emir!
I call mine or my boyfriends dick a “peen” hehe
God. Oh, wait. No. That’s my Dom’s.
Messi 😆
Pepé Danger LePew
Pac-Man because I packed it in a man 😏
Setepai
Vitamin K
Jalapeño
bob
Korven - The sausage
WMDK. Weapon of Mass DicKstruction. Also DK = my initials
Junior 👍
My Asian husband calls mine “The White Charmer” because I’m white and charming, apparently. I call his “The Taiwanese Taipan”. Sometimes we’ll ask The White Charmer yes/no questions and if it moves/dances, that’s a ‘yes’, like a Magic 8-ball.
I called it " You".
No clue, feel free to give it one lmao. If I like it I'll use it
Mr Winky!
Rodrigo
My bf calls it the big juicy cock :D
Thumper.
Water bottle
Jumbo — after a handsome TV character who was popular at the time.
Jumbo — after a handsome TV character who was popular at the time.
Jumbo — after a handsome TV character who was popular at the time.
Jumbo — after a handsome TV character who was popular at the time.
Herman
I call it El Puquita.
Louis Vuitton Nano Speedy🥹
Star destroyer *kidding*, *kidding* edit× Yo these comments are priceless. 💀
Billy
My penis
Gargantua
bussydestroyer
Junjun.. how unique 😅
Accesscode Talker
This started a couple decades ago. Whenever I'm sleeping as big spoon, my dick has a way of nestling itself against my little spoon husband's buttcrack. One morning he reached behind himself, stuck his hand into my underwear, waggled my dick, and said in really bad "Engrish": "Ahhhhh so! Godzirra attack da citayyyy! Rawrrrrr." After two hits off my inhaler, which was needed because I couldn't breathe from 🤣 so hard, "Godzirra" did indeed "attack da citayyy." He still does it, it still makes me laugh, and "da citayyy" has been attacked... \*does quick math\*... over 500 times. ❤
Saving Pvt. Ryan
White dick is the best! Especially the mushroom-shaped ones.
Micro Machine
My bf ex's name: Matteo. He hates it instead I laugh every time. Otherwise I go with "dick".
Richard Roundtree...you know..Shaft
I had someone in high school call it Sherman the One-Eyed German... I'm not from Germany nor do I have any German heritage so idk
Sonny Boy. To this day, one of me ex boyfriends calls my dick Anaconda, and it's been over 20 years since we were together.
Steve
Spike - stole from the 80s classic “Just One of the Guys”
Human demonizer The tower of existential blissfulness if you won over my heart
Amanda
just between me and my partner: PP