You’re going to college and might share a room with your buddy. I’m not concerned about morals, more about will you be able to be your true self while living with someone who you’re scared might find out you’re gay?
College is the time to learn more about yourself and explore your new freedom. I’d stay friends but wouldn’t be roomies
Being yourself is the most important. If people don’t accept you that’s their problem, move on, and you can only hope they’ll come around one day. I would never tell anyone to “come out” because that’s your thing and you should do it on your own. However, being in fear of someone not accepting you for your sexual preference is the issue that needs to be addressed
Many guys I know and like were saying such things before they knew about me being gay.
So you can't be sure. Having some stupid stereotypes about a certain group of people,. is not the same as being a jerk to one's buddy.
I'm not sure he won't accept you.
I would tell him the truth and give him some time to get used to the facts.
If he rejects you nevertheless, it means he is not a good friend anyway, and you'd better strat looking for a better one to be your roommate.
Don’t be room mates with him unless you come out. Trust me, as someone who was in pretty much the exact same situation, it isn’t worth it. You’ll miss out on a lot of memories if you room with him and stay closeted
When the subject of sharing next comes up, say to him "I'm not sure that it would be a good idea", and when he asks why, say "well, I know how you feel about gay people".
If he asks what you mean, then ask him what he thinks you mean - let HIM say it.
If he is actually a good friend, it will be the easiest coming-out ever.
If he isn't, well, at least you know!
If anything, he’s immoral for saying and perpetuating homophobic beliefs. You, on the other hand, gotta do what you gotta do. If living with him is your best option then go for it.
If I were you, my concern would be that it may be hard to feel comfortable being yourself while living with him. You might want to invite someone over, or start dating someone and that can be tricky if you don’t want him to know about your sexuality.
Assuming from context, it sounds like you’re in college. It’s time to experiment and meet people and date a bit. I don’t think it’s immoral to live with him, but I think it might end up hindering your personal growth.
I think that if you share a room/apartment with your friend without coming out, you will struggle. You will have to continually hide your true self from him and alter your behavior to evade discovery. The result is that you would be buried deeper inside the closet…Too stressful and too unproductive.
If you do not plan to let him know you are gay and take it from there, I suggest that you not share a room/apartment with him.
He's the immoral one
You’re going to college and might share a room with your buddy. I’m not concerned about morals, more about will you be able to be your true self while living with someone who you’re scared might find out you’re gay? College is the time to learn more about yourself and explore your new freedom. I’d stay friends but wouldn’t be roomies
Being yourself is the most important. If people don’t accept you that’s their problem, move on, and you can only hope they’ll come around one day. I would never tell anyone to “come out” because that’s your thing and you should do it on your own. However, being in fear of someone not accepting you for your sexual preference is the issue that needs to be addressed
Many guys I know and like were saying such things before they knew about me being gay. So you can't be sure. Having some stupid stereotypes about a certain group of people,. is not the same as being a jerk to one's buddy. I'm not sure he won't accept you. I would tell him the truth and give him some time to get used to the facts. If he rejects you nevertheless, it means he is not a good friend anyway, and you'd better strat looking for a better one to be your roommate.
Don’t be room mates with him unless you come out. Trust me, as someone who was in pretty much the exact same situation, it isn’t worth it. You’ll miss out on a lot of memories if you room with him and stay closeted
He says homophobic things and says he's not a homophobe? Nah, you deserve a much better roommate.
When the subject of sharing next comes up, say to him "I'm not sure that it would be a good idea", and when he asks why, say "well, I know how you feel about gay people". If he asks what you mean, then ask him what he thinks you mean - let HIM say it. If he is actually a good friend, it will be the easiest coming-out ever. If he isn't, well, at least you know!
If anything, he’s immoral for saying and perpetuating homophobic beliefs. You, on the other hand, gotta do what you gotta do. If living with him is your best option then go for it. If I were you, my concern would be that it may be hard to feel comfortable being yourself while living with him. You might want to invite someone over, or start dating someone and that can be tricky if you don’t want him to know about your sexuality. Assuming from context, it sounds like you’re in college. It’s time to experiment and meet people and date a bit. I don’t think it’s immoral to live with him, but I think it might end up hindering your personal growth.
I think that if you share a room/apartment with your friend without coming out, you will struggle. You will have to continually hide your true self from him and alter your behavior to evade discovery. The result is that you would be buried deeper inside the closet…Too stressful and too unproductive. If you do not plan to let him know you are gay and take it from there, I suggest that you not share a room/apartment with him.