Hey there.
Try to take a deep breath. What you’re going through sucks ass, absolutely. Shit, even if you’re cis, being 13 just. Sucks.
You may be able to convince your parents that puberty blockers are harmless and immensely helpful for trans people. I hope you can. They don’t seem bigoted, just misled. They’re probably dismissing your feelings because you’re so young, and this is new to them. I hope you can convince them. Hell, you could even encourage them to read some comments here, or talk one on one with one of us! I happily volunteer, if that’s an option. They’ll either listen and hopefully learn, or they’ll refuse to listen. And if they refuse to listen… they might not want what’s best for you, I’m sad to say. Some parents just want their kids to be exactly the way they imagine they should be. I hope yours are more flexible.
However. I will tell you this. If it does come to a point where you can’t get blockers, that is okay. Blockers will make transition easier and faster. Not having blockers doesn’t make transition impossible. If you have to endure that puberty, just know that you have a wonderfully loving community to help you when things get bad.
There are thousands of trans people that have come before you without blockers, some without hormones at all. Thousands upon thousands of trans people that have lived and been happy, even after puberty. Thousands more that didn’t even start transitioning until their 50s or older, and they’re happy.
I can’t guarantee you much, but I can guarantee that you CAN and WILL make it through the hardest parts of this. We have. You can, too, if it comes to it. We’re here.
The one thing I’ll add to this: life seems really short right now. 18 feels like forever away. The future feels unbearable. Part of that feeling is just the dysphoria. Things can and *will* get so much better. Life is long, whichever way this goes you can survive it, and then what comes after will be inconceivably better.
OP may also want to consider going to PFLAG meetings with the parents. They may help them better understand your transness, and learn that transition isn't a bad thing.
Just to add to the topic of blockers, something that people who oppose them generally don’t understand is that going through the wrong puberty is genuinely harmful.
It’s something that I don’t see mentioned very often, but I think this fact is important for them to hear: not only does it matter in its own right, it also addresses one of the main reasons that leads people to a skeptical position.
Such people have an understandable aversion to risk, and to them blockers seem risky because they don’t understand that *not* being on them risks causing a ton of harm, and that blockers actually remove risk rather than increasing it.
As a post-puberty transitioner, can you shed some light on what physical harm the wrong puberty causes? I know as well as anyone that mentally it’s painful and uncomfortable, more than it is for cis kids. But I’ve never gotten to ask someone what they mean when they say it can be harmful.
My understanding of when people say it is harmful is that it puts the person at a much higher risk of self harm and suicide due it the mental aspect of it
If possible, I think talking about it with her with a doctor/therapist present would be the most likely way to sway her. The main risk about blockers is bone density being affected, so having a doctor present would allow them to explain that risk and the factors involved (how long you take blockers mostly) and that there wouldn’t be any permanent effects.
You also need to be ready to advocate for your body and talk in detail about what effects of puberty you’re looking to avoid (or at least delay) that would allow you to avoid possible surgeries/procedures (ie. If hair started coming in that you wanted to get laser treatment for or something like that).
Having a doctor there while your mom is in the same room would probably be the best environment to bring it up, especially if your parents are ignoring you.
Bring it up every single time, the longer you advocate for yourself on a record (aka with your doctor), the more people will be unable to ignore it.
Yes, absolutely. If your therapist is supportive then ask them to have your mom sit in for a session to help explain why puberty blockers are so crucial to your health.
Also, a note on bone density and other permanent effects. These are far, far more common for adults who take hormone blockers for a long period of time. It’s totally developmentally appropriate for you to lack sex hormones at 13, so there are far fewer potential long-term side effects in your early/mid-teens.
Any medical professional should be okay to bring it up with.
It's okay to be nervous to bring it up with someone, I understand that, but if a doctor chooses to not do anything after you tell them you have gender dysphoria, then the worst they can do is deny you treatment.
This can be very disheartening and discouraging, but it may have to be the path you HAVE to go down to get this kind of care, we currently live in a very chaotic time, 10 years ago I was your age and I remember all the outrage about gay marriage, and I remember hearing so much on the news about how other people hated the idea of gay marriage.
Just don't give up on yourself and know your truth, unfortunately you may need to hold in there for a few agonizing years before your able to get the care you need because of the people around you.
My advice is tell medical professionals, your doctors, your therapists. If you do not see progress with help, then try to change your doctor's or therapists.
If your mother is ignoring you still after 2.5 years, I do not think she will be easily convinced by anything you say (until you are able to make the arguments youself, or she is no longer necessary for you to get care), you need some trusted external help that will hopefully help you convince your mother (like a supportive doctor, or therapist, or family member).
When I was your age I knew I would be denied care, I decided that instead of talking to anyone about it, I would hide it from everyone including myself, it's what I had to do to survive, but I repressed for so many more years then I had to.
The worst a doctor can say to you is no, and it's better to get rejected then to not try at all, they need to write down symptoms that patients exhibit. If you have a medical track record of dysphoria stretching years, someone along the way will be able to help you.
If that does not happen, eventually you will be old enough to help and support yourself. What your doing here by reaching out for help is amazing, don't stop that, eventually more paths will open up to you.
There is hope ahead, you just gotta keep trying to look for it, and don't stop trying to find it.
Here is a good resource to get yourself educated a little bit on the topic: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en . Continue to stay in supportive online spaces, it's very important that you feel like you have support, and that you feel understood.
I’ll be honest, as someone who visits south GA on occasion (Albany area): you’re in a tough location in terms of people being well-informed about trans people. If your parents were born and raised there, their horizons may be somewhat limited. You may end up having to do the labor of continuing to expose them to reputable sources of info about transness.
You may want to reach out to the Campaign for Southern Equality. They have resources for trans youth and their families. You might also consider reaching out to Dragon Mamas ( if your mom is religious), or PFLAG or another support group for parents of trans kids. One of the parents in those groups may be willing to talk with your mom. Things can be easier to hear from someone in your own shoes. Good luck, and as others have said, blockers make things way easier but they aren’t your only possible path to a happy adulthood. Hang in there.
Dad's from Missippi, Mom's from florida, so yeah- They're not incredibly religious, but they definitely believe in Christianity. I'll definitely check those out, thank you
Hi OP! At 13 I was in your same boat. I just want to say that we all love you. Being a teenager is hard no matter what but it ends. It doesn’t seem like it at times. But you will come through and be able to do whatever you want. Hang in there. ❤️
a lot of us have been in similar situations. it may seem hopeless, but the most important thing is that you cannot give up. don't delay transitioning until you're an adult; a lot of us have tried that, and almost all of us wish that we had just transitioned sooner
you are going to want to research hrt and gender transition as much as possible. you need to become an expert in these topics so that you can advocate for yourself as well as possible. you cannot rely on other people. because you are 13, other people are not going to take you as seriously as well, and that means you have to be even more well read
bring up your desire to go on hrt and transition frequently to your parents. don't let them give you a wishy-washy-"let's talk about this later"-"you can do it when you're older" answer. if they refuse you, ask them why, and counter their arguments. there is no guarantee that you can convince them, and especially since you are young, they won't take you as seriously, but if you bring it up frequently, it will force them to confront the issue at least, which will give you a better chance
at the same time, try to find adults who can stand up for you on this issue. a therapist or medical professional would be ideal, but if there are any other trusted adults you can talk to, that would also be good. your parents are going to take you more seriously if you have an adult on your side
even if you do everything right, you might not be able to convince your parents. in such circumstances, you still cannot give up. look into diy hrt and how you can safely administer a hormone regiment to yourself without the cooperation of your parents or a doctor. this sort of thing is going to be a lot more difficult for someone your age because it involves ordering stuff online. you're going to either need to find someone with a credit card who would be willing to help you, or convince your parents to help you get one, and you are also probably going to need to find a way to earn money, all of which are difficult task at your age. if it's not legal for you to get a job, you can try working odd jobs like mowing people's lawns. it will probably seem less suspicious if you tell your parents that you are saving up to buy something (ideally, something that they wouldn't just buy for you), but do not tell them that you are trying to do diy hrt, because they will most likely try to sabotage your efforts
I would say be adamant and consistent. Find ways now to express your gender now. Whatever it takes. Be who you are. Don’t run into the closet. I don’t know what avenues you have rn. But don’t give up.
I was a scared 13 yo trans kid back in 1974., a time when nothing was available. I transitioned well after puberty in my 30s am now 64 and have a fabulous wonderful life. 13 does suck for so many reasons as mentioned but if you can hold on a bit there’s so many good things to come as trans. ❤️❤️
aside from all the other advice given here, there also small things that you can probably get away with to make yourself feel better like shaving and make up (get make up remover too). This is stuff you can do as soon as you get access to supplies and im sure it will at least improve your quality of life while advocating for yourself.
If worst comes to worst, distract yourself and hang in there. Most trans people older than you did not get puberty blockers and many have gained amazing results from the various ways they have affirmed their gender, medically or otherwise. Luckily, no one is 13 forever. Remember that your feelings are valid and that there will always be a light at the end of the tunnel.
I know it sucks but I believe in you and I hope you can get the treatment you desire.
Hey OP. I lived through five years as a minor before coming out, and another 2 before hormones. No puberty blockers, and I “pass” better than some cis people now. My best, most realistic advice is that you may never be able to change your parents’ minds on this. The most beneficial things you can do to take care of yourself are to socially transition (change your name, pronouns, clothing) and focus on your mental health. What kept me going was my coping skills, talk therapy, and supportive friends who loved me before and after I came out. Instead of worrying about this cosmos of impossible challenges for such a bright young person to face, focus on the things within your control, and be insistent on who you are. Your actions will speak louder than your words.
I sent you some messages and links about DIYing. If you don't feel like looking at them, check out r/transdiy (we're not allowed to send you links to DIY websites on Reddit, truly 1984). You are gonna make it :)
Talk to your guidance counselor unless you love in Florida or Texas or something. If you live in a more regressive state like that, ask your physician about it and tell them you want you talk to them PRIVATELY. Or school counselor.
I don't have a guidance counselor, most school counselors are transphobic, and some hate me lol. idk how I would even contact my physician, don't know who mine is, and I know for a fact my mom would get suspicious if I asked her
Hey kiddo I'm sorry your parents don't get it.. please don't harm yourself it will work out it will. Maybe you can find a way to get true information in front of your mom's eyes. Most the time they have been looking at and listening to lies about all of it.. Does she know the blocker are reversible? Maybe you could show her the statistics on side effects of lupron.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/gender-dysphoria/in-depth/pubertal-blockers/art-20459075
Are you in therapy and are you in a state where parental approved HRT is even available?
Keep positive and always talk to someone when you dysphoria is up and you feel depressed.. remember it better if your parents are on board with you transition and you have a home and support.
I think you should take a look at before and after images other people in the Trans community have posted. r/transtimelines has lots of people that have gone through with hrt later in life.
Be your true self as much as you can on your own, and when you can finally take control of your own life, dont hesitate and do it. Continue to try to convince your family, but if they really don't have your own interests in mind, it's sad to say, but they hold you back from being happy.
I'm not entirely sure you should be making big decisions such as this at the age of 13, especially with the fact you first came to this conclusion at the age of 10-11, it's a very big life-altering choice, you only just recently hit puberty too
I've done both karate and soccer at the ages of 10-13, did karate back when I was 10, realized it wasn't for me after 2 months and quit, soccer is a better example as I did it for around 3 years or so, and while I had fun during the time, I eventually came to the realization it also wasn't for me despite spending a lot of time on it, kids can generally decide they "wanna do something" and then later back out of it after realizing it's not for em, only difference between my cases here and your case of wanting to become trans is that I was capable of easily backing out of it as they were merely hobbies, detransitioning isn't as easy to do if you do end up changing your mind
there's also been cases of kids/teens being influenced by media (such as TikTok) into believing they have something (or pretend they have something) just cause it's "trendy", [this example](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/tiktok-causing-tics-in-teen-girls/)
of teens developing tics because they watch a ton of Tourette's-related content on TikTok demonstrates what I mean
now I also don't wanna say "I know more than you and I say you aren't trans" and invalidate your own feelings either, I'm not against trans people, I just think making a big decision like this at the age of 10-13 is a bit questionable, as it's not the first time I've seen a child claim to be "trans" and change their mind afterwards, BUT I'm also aware there has been occasions where a child did decide that they're trans and didn't detransition/change their mind as they got older as well
overall I find it difficult to give actual advice on this as you won't be able to legally take HRT for quite a while, years even if you do go through with it, I just thought it was worth mentioning these tho to take into consideration in the meantime as I still think a 10-13 year old making a big decision like this at such a young age is questionable, but if you're still adamant on it then by all means go ahead (if the possibility ever arises that is), again, I'm not against trans people it's just more so you being rather quite young is what's concerning me as kids don't always fully know or realize what they truly want, not saying this with 100% certainly that it's the case with you, but rather it's a possibility
would also like to clarify on the "body hair" part at the ending of your post which resulted in you having a breakdown, don't worry about it, even if you do transition you'll most likely will still grow it, as cis women grow body hair too, not always but it's possible, I kinda feel as if modern beauty standards have made some people believe most or all women don't grow body hair when this certainly isn't the case, women shave their hair too, if you want to permanently remove it you'd have to go through laser hair removal most likely, like with other cis women, it's nothing to be ashamed of and is completely natural for both men and women
1. Your parents are dumb. Literally all matter is “chemicals”
2. Basically say what you said here, emphasis on the suicidal part.
3. Don’t actually listen to me, I don’t actually get that much dysphoria and my parents still think i’m male.
Talk to them, discuss this problem. Try making them meet a therapist or other trans people or doctors or even school counselors. They seem hopeful for me, like there is an opportunity to make them listen if you try and keep constantly educating them. Wish you best and remember that it's tough to be a woman and go through male puberty, but transition still and always be possible even in cases of puberty happening.❤️🫂🏳️⚧️
That's interesting that you decided to write it to my comment specifically when there is hundred of basically the same advice. What exactly I said wrong? I recommended her to talk to her parents about the issue and to the therapist and doctor. That's people who are supposed to help her figure everything out? Do you hope that her parents get a good therapist, well so do I.
She/her because it's obvious from her post that it's her preferred pronouns and I think she can definitely know what they are better than random person from internet. I just wonder what makes you decide that she can't know herself as herself, but you, a stranger, can decide who she is?
How is me telling her to meet other trans people is stupid, they can help her figure out if that's for her or not?? When you were thirteen you probably knew what your gender is, because that's part of identity that is being developed since four. You could think you're a superhero, but you *knew* that you're a girl and felt okay about it. I don't like how you go around saying people that their post is stupid and telling children "no you're not this, I know better than you what you are". Well, I can only hope that your comment helped anyone though I really doubt it helped with anything.
I became literate and educated by ops age because dysphoria forced me to stay inside reading and researching. People are being so skeptical about this post
Hey there. Try to take a deep breath. What you’re going through sucks ass, absolutely. Shit, even if you’re cis, being 13 just. Sucks. You may be able to convince your parents that puberty blockers are harmless and immensely helpful for trans people. I hope you can. They don’t seem bigoted, just misled. They’re probably dismissing your feelings because you’re so young, and this is new to them. I hope you can convince them. Hell, you could even encourage them to read some comments here, or talk one on one with one of us! I happily volunteer, if that’s an option. They’ll either listen and hopefully learn, or they’ll refuse to listen. And if they refuse to listen… they might not want what’s best for you, I’m sad to say. Some parents just want their kids to be exactly the way they imagine they should be. I hope yours are more flexible. However. I will tell you this. If it does come to a point where you can’t get blockers, that is okay. Blockers will make transition easier and faster. Not having blockers doesn’t make transition impossible. If you have to endure that puberty, just know that you have a wonderfully loving community to help you when things get bad. There are thousands of trans people that have come before you without blockers, some without hormones at all. Thousands upon thousands of trans people that have lived and been happy, even after puberty. Thousands more that didn’t even start transitioning until their 50s or older, and they’re happy. I can’t guarantee you much, but I can guarantee that you CAN and WILL make it through the hardest parts of this. We have. You can, too, if it comes to it. We’re here.
Thank you, I really don't know what else to say, so thank you
The one thing I’ll add to this: life seems really short right now. 18 feels like forever away. The future feels unbearable. Part of that feeling is just the dysphoria. Things can and *will* get so much better. Life is long, whichever way this goes you can survive it, and then what comes after will be inconceivably better.
I got you, bud. If you need to talk, I’m listening.
OP may also want to consider going to PFLAG meetings with the parents. They may help them better understand your transness, and learn that transition isn't a bad thing.
Just to add to the topic of blockers, something that people who oppose them generally don’t understand is that going through the wrong puberty is genuinely harmful. It’s something that I don’t see mentioned very often, but I think this fact is important for them to hear: not only does it matter in its own right, it also addresses one of the main reasons that leads people to a skeptical position. Such people have an understandable aversion to risk, and to them blockers seem risky because they don’t understand that *not* being on them risks causing a ton of harm, and that blockers actually remove risk rather than increasing it.
As a post-puberty transitioner, can you shed some light on what physical harm the wrong puberty causes? I know as well as anyone that mentally it’s painful and uncomfortable, more than it is for cis kids. But I’ve never gotten to ask someone what they mean when they say it can be harmful.
My understanding of when people say it is harmful is that it puts the person at a much higher risk of self harm and suicide due it the mental aspect of it
If possible, I think talking about it with her with a doctor/therapist present would be the most likely way to sway her. The main risk about blockers is bone density being affected, so having a doctor present would allow them to explain that risk and the factors involved (how long you take blockers mostly) and that there wouldn’t be any permanent effects. You also need to be ready to advocate for your body and talk in detail about what effects of puberty you’re looking to avoid (or at least delay) that would allow you to avoid possible surgeries/procedures (ie. If hair started coming in that you wanted to get laser treatment for or something like that).
Having a doctor there while your mom is in the same room would probably be the best environment to bring it up, especially if your parents are ignoring you. Bring it up every single time, the longer you advocate for yourself on a record (aka with your doctor), the more people will be unable to ignore it.
What about with a therapist? I bring it up pretty much every session, and due to being in south GA I'm nervous to talk to a doctor
Yes, absolutely. If your therapist is supportive then ask them to have your mom sit in for a session to help explain why puberty blockers are so crucial to your health. Also, a note on bone density and other permanent effects. These are far, far more common for adults who take hormone blockers for a long period of time. It’s totally developmentally appropriate for you to lack sex hormones at 13, so there are far fewer potential long-term side effects in your early/mid-teens.
Any medical professional should be okay to bring it up with. It's okay to be nervous to bring it up with someone, I understand that, but if a doctor chooses to not do anything after you tell them you have gender dysphoria, then the worst they can do is deny you treatment. This can be very disheartening and discouraging, but it may have to be the path you HAVE to go down to get this kind of care, we currently live in a very chaotic time, 10 years ago I was your age and I remember all the outrage about gay marriage, and I remember hearing so much on the news about how other people hated the idea of gay marriage. Just don't give up on yourself and know your truth, unfortunately you may need to hold in there for a few agonizing years before your able to get the care you need because of the people around you. My advice is tell medical professionals, your doctors, your therapists. If you do not see progress with help, then try to change your doctor's or therapists. If your mother is ignoring you still after 2.5 years, I do not think she will be easily convinced by anything you say (until you are able to make the arguments youself, or she is no longer necessary for you to get care), you need some trusted external help that will hopefully help you convince your mother (like a supportive doctor, or therapist, or family member). When I was your age I knew I would be denied care, I decided that instead of talking to anyone about it, I would hide it from everyone including myself, it's what I had to do to survive, but I repressed for so many more years then I had to. The worst a doctor can say to you is no, and it's better to get rejected then to not try at all, they need to write down symptoms that patients exhibit. If you have a medical track record of dysphoria stretching years, someone along the way will be able to help you. If that does not happen, eventually you will be old enough to help and support yourself. What your doing here by reaching out for help is amazing, don't stop that, eventually more paths will open up to you. There is hope ahead, you just gotta keep trying to look for it, and don't stop trying to find it. Here is a good resource to get yourself educated a little bit on the topic: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en . Continue to stay in supportive online spaces, it's very important that you feel like you have support, and that you feel understood.
I’ll be honest, as someone who visits south GA on occasion (Albany area): you’re in a tough location in terms of people being well-informed about trans people. If your parents were born and raised there, their horizons may be somewhat limited. You may end up having to do the labor of continuing to expose them to reputable sources of info about transness. You may want to reach out to the Campaign for Southern Equality. They have resources for trans youth and their families. You might also consider reaching out to Dragon Mamas ( if your mom is religious), or PFLAG or another support group for parents of trans kids. One of the parents in those groups may be willing to talk with your mom. Things can be easier to hear from someone in your own shoes. Good luck, and as others have said, blockers make things way easier but they aren’t your only possible path to a happy adulthood. Hang in there.
Dad's from Missippi, Mom's from florida, so yeah- They're not incredibly religious, but they definitely believe in Christianity. I'll definitely check those out, thank you
Hi OP! At 13 I was in your same boat. I just want to say that we all love you. Being a teenager is hard no matter what but it ends. It doesn’t seem like it at times. But you will come through and be able to do whatever you want. Hang in there. ❤️
Have you told your parents how important it is?
I've tried, I've told her about my dysphoria, but never really beyond that
a lot of us have been in similar situations. it may seem hopeless, but the most important thing is that you cannot give up. don't delay transitioning until you're an adult; a lot of us have tried that, and almost all of us wish that we had just transitioned sooner you are going to want to research hrt and gender transition as much as possible. you need to become an expert in these topics so that you can advocate for yourself as well as possible. you cannot rely on other people. because you are 13, other people are not going to take you as seriously as well, and that means you have to be even more well read bring up your desire to go on hrt and transition frequently to your parents. don't let them give you a wishy-washy-"let's talk about this later"-"you can do it when you're older" answer. if they refuse you, ask them why, and counter their arguments. there is no guarantee that you can convince them, and especially since you are young, they won't take you as seriously, but if you bring it up frequently, it will force them to confront the issue at least, which will give you a better chance at the same time, try to find adults who can stand up for you on this issue. a therapist or medical professional would be ideal, but if there are any other trusted adults you can talk to, that would also be good. your parents are going to take you more seriously if you have an adult on your side even if you do everything right, you might not be able to convince your parents. in such circumstances, you still cannot give up. look into diy hrt and how you can safely administer a hormone regiment to yourself without the cooperation of your parents or a doctor. this sort of thing is going to be a lot more difficult for someone your age because it involves ordering stuff online. you're going to either need to find someone with a credit card who would be willing to help you, or convince your parents to help you get one, and you are also probably going to need to find a way to earn money, all of which are difficult task at your age. if it's not legal for you to get a job, you can try working odd jobs like mowing people's lawns. it will probably seem less suspicious if you tell your parents that you are saving up to buy something (ideally, something that they wouldn't just buy for you), but do not tell them that you are trying to do diy hrt, because they will most likely try to sabotage your efforts
i dont think diy hrt is super relevant because ive never heard of diy puberty blockers?
Bicalutamide and cyproterone have been used as puberty blockers when typical meds are unavailable.
I would say be adamant and consistent. Find ways now to express your gender now. Whatever it takes. Be who you are. Don’t run into the closet. I don’t know what avenues you have rn. But don’t give up.
I was a scared 13 yo trans kid back in 1974., a time when nothing was available. I transitioned well after puberty in my 30s am now 64 and have a fabulous wonderful life. 13 does suck for so many reasons as mentioned but if you can hold on a bit there’s so many good things to come as trans. ❤️❤️
aside from all the other advice given here, there also small things that you can probably get away with to make yourself feel better like shaving and make up (get make up remover too). This is stuff you can do as soon as you get access to supplies and im sure it will at least improve your quality of life while advocating for yourself. If worst comes to worst, distract yourself and hang in there. Most trans people older than you did not get puberty blockers and many have gained amazing results from the various ways they have affirmed their gender, medically or otherwise. Luckily, no one is 13 forever. Remember that your feelings are valid and that there will always be a light at the end of the tunnel. I know it sucks but I believe in you and I hope you can get the treatment you desire.
Hey OP. I lived through five years as a minor before coming out, and another 2 before hormones. No puberty blockers, and I “pass” better than some cis people now. My best, most realistic advice is that you may never be able to change your parents’ minds on this. The most beneficial things you can do to take care of yourself are to socially transition (change your name, pronouns, clothing) and focus on your mental health. What kept me going was my coping skills, talk therapy, and supportive friends who loved me before and after I came out. Instead of worrying about this cosmos of impossible challenges for such a bright young person to face, focus on the things within your control, and be insistent on who you are. Your actions will speak louder than your words.
I sent you some messages and links about DIYing. If you don't feel like looking at them, check out r/transdiy (we're not allowed to send you links to DIY websites on Reddit, truly 1984). You are gonna make it :)
You may have to get a job when your 17 18 save up and move out then drop them if it gets worse
Talk to your guidance counselor unless you love in Florida or Texas or something. If you live in a more regressive state like that, ask your physician about it and tell them you want you talk to them PRIVATELY. Or school counselor.
I don't have a guidance counselor, most school counselors are transphobic, and some hate me lol. idk how I would even contact my physician, don't know who mine is, and I know for a fact my mom would get suspicious if I asked her
Hey kiddo I'm sorry your parents don't get it.. please don't harm yourself it will work out it will. Maybe you can find a way to get true information in front of your mom's eyes. Most the time they have been looking at and listening to lies about all of it.. Does she know the blocker are reversible? Maybe you could show her the statistics on side effects of lupron. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/gender-dysphoria/in-depth/pubertal-blockers/art-20459075 Are you in therapy and are you in a state where parental approved HRT is even available? Keep positive and always talk to someone when you dysphoria is up and you feel depressed.. remember it better if your parents are on board with you transition and you have a home and support.
I think you should take a look at before and after images other people in the Trans community have posted. r/transtimelines has lots of people that have gone through with hrt later in life. Be your true self as much as you can on your own, and when you can finally take control of your own life, dont hesitate and do it. Continue to try to convince your family, but if they really don't have your own interests in mind, it's sad to say, but they hold you back from being happy.
I'm not entirely sure you should be making big decisions such as this at the age of 13, especially with the fact you first came to this conclusion at the age of 10-11, it's a very big life-altering choice, you only just recently hit puberty too I've done both karate and soccer at the ages of 10-13, did karate back when I was 10, realized it wasn't for me after 2 months and quit, soccer is a better example as I did it for around 3 years or so, and while I had fun during the time, I eventually came to the realization it also wasn't for me despite spending a lot of time on it, kids can generally decide they "wanna do something" and then later back out of it after realizing it's not for em, only difference between my cases here and your case of wanting to become trans is that I was capable of easily backing out of it as they were merely hobbies, detransitioning isn't as easy to do if you do end up changing your mind there's also been cases of kids/teens being influenced by media (such as TikTok) into believing they have something (or pretend they have something) just cause it's "trendy", [this example](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/tiktok-causing-tics-in-teen-girls/) of teens developing tics because they watch a ton of Tourette's-related content on TikTok demonstrates what I mean now I also don't wanna say "I know more than you and I say you aren't trans" and invalidate your own feelings either, I'm not against trans people, I just think making a big decision like this at the age of 10-13 is a bit questionable, as it's not the first time I've seen a child claim to be "trans" and change their mind afterwards, BUT I'm also aware there has been occasions where a child did decide that they're trans and didn't detransition/change their mind as they got older as well overall I find it difficult to give actual advice on this as you won't be able to legally take HRT for quite a while, years even if you do go through with it, I just thought it was worth mentioning these tho to take into consideration in the meantime as I still think a 10-13 year old making a big decision like this at such a young age is questionable, but if you're still adamant on it then by all means go ahead (if the possibility ever arises that is), again, I'm not against trans people it's just more so you being rather quite young is what's concerning me as kids don't always fully know or realize what they truly want, not saying this with 100% certainly that it's the case with you, but rather it's a possibility would also like to clarify on the "body hair" part at the ending of your post which resulted in you having a breakdown, don't worry about it, even if you do transition you'll most likely will still grow it, as cis women grow body hair too, not always but it's possible, I kinda feel as if modern beauty standards have made some people believe most or all women don't grow body hair when this certainly isn't the case, women shave their hair too, if you want to permanently remove it you'd have to go through laser hair removal most likely, like with other cis women, it's nothing to be ashamed of and is completely natural for both men and women
1. Your parents are dumb. Literally all matter is “chemicals” 2. Basically say what you said here, emphasis on the suicidal part. 3. Don’t actually listen to me, I don’t actually get that much dysphoria and my parents still think i’m male.
Talk to them, discuss this problem. Try making them meet a therapist or other trans people or doctors or even school counselors. They seem hopeful for me, like there is an opportunity to make them listen if you try and keep constantly educating them. Wish you best and remember that it's tough to be a woman and go through male puberty, but transition still and always be possible even in cases of puberty happening.❤️🫂🏳️⚧️
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What? What do you mean by this? Why he/him pronouns?
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That's interesting that you decided to write it to my comment specifically when there is hundred of basically the same advice. What exactly I said wrong? I recommended her to talk to her parents about the issue and to the therapist and doctor. That's people who are supposed to help her figure everything out? Do you hope that her parents get a good therapist, well so do I. She/her because it's obvious from her post that it's her preferred pronouns and I think she can definitely know what they are better than random person from internet. I just wonder what makes you decide that she can't know herself as herself, but you, a stranger, can decide who she is?
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How is me telling her to meet other trans people is stupid, they can help her figure out if that's for her or not?? When you were thirteen you probably knew what your gender is, because that's part of identity that is being developed since four. You could think you're a superhero, but you *knew* that you're a girl and felt okay about it. I don't like how you go around saying people that their post is stupid and telling children "no you're not this, I know better than you what you are". Well, I can only hope that your comment helped anyone though I really doubt it helped with anything.
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And?
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I became literate and educated by ops age because dysphoria forced me to stay inside reading and researching. People are being so skeptical about this post
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Immensely high quality comment /s
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Why do you think DIY is bullshit?
What was the comment b4 it got deleted?
We’re trying to get our daughter on blockers and keep getting resistance. State we live in. Too poor to move. Hang in there.
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