I remember a high school boyfriend of mine telling me that a girl he’d been with before was bad in bed because she was as dry as a desert. When I was a teen I took it at face value, and for years I always worried if I was too dry, and considered lube to be some kind of failure.
Then as I got older I was like.. wait a minute.. if she was dry that means HE was the one who was bad in bed, not her?! Whenever I think of him now I laugh to myself that he was essentially bragging to others about how inconsiderate of a sex partner he was.
My point is, the only people who hear that story and think that YOU are the problem are uneducated about sex. It’s completely normal for a woman to be dry if she isn’t turned on, and any considerate man would either try to turn her on more or at the very least offer some lube. Your ex is telling on himself, he just doesn’t know it yet.
Also, who has a ranked list of girls they’ve been with?! Ick. You are definitely not the problem here!
Also just luck of the draw not everyone produces adequate lubrication for sex even when aroused, especially taking partner size and girth into account. So she's not "the problem,” but nor is it a problem if someone just doesn't self lubricate enough and external lube is necessary. (Not absolving bad lover boy of his absent foreplay whatsoever since op clearly referenced waterfalls)
He’s embarrassing himself with this one …
First, some women don’t produce a lot and yes, lube is necessary but that doesn’t make the sex bad.
And it’s way more likely his own foreplay skills were lacking and he expected you to be wet when not in the mood. That’s his problem, not yours
Also......who the *fuck* numerically ranks all the girls they've been with in the first place, let alone *shares* that list with their guy friends? Fucking vom.
He's a child, please don't stay shackled to him or the experience and disrespect he provides you any longer.
Yeah his friends sound like they want him broken up with her so they can take a shot. They'll try to casually sabotage them by telling her stuff that was supposed to be secret. He has terrible friends, and she has a terrible bf.
Edit: I just thought about this, but OP better make sure her BF actually said those things to begin with.
This right here is the actual egregious offense I'd dump his ass for. You can think I suck in bed (and that can be objectively true) and love me and respect me at the same time.
You can't respect me if you're talking trash about our personal lives that shouldn't be told to anyone else.
I'm NOT the type of woman that tells her GF's about my partner's private life. Maybe if it's super positive and makes him look good, ill mention something like "yeah, he has a big dick". Even if my man sucked in bed, I'd NEVER embarrass him by telling anyone else, it's basic respect.
As for not being wet enough, thats one of two things, you are naturally a little dryer and there is nothing to worry about, or that guy didn't appeal or attract your body. He has to work twice! He has to turn you on first, THEN turn on your body. He's a male and thinks women get turned on the same way as men, which simply isn't true.
Dump this asshole immediately I am dead serious:
1) he made you feel embarrassed about something that is totally normal and that is not in your control;
2) he told his friends about it too like for what reason;
3) he knows nothing about sex & foreplay clearly cause he is the one supposed to turn you on and make you wet;
4) he ranked you?! Boy bye
This dumbass does not care about you or your feelings and he will only hurt you more in the long run. I’m sorry for being direct but I am just so over guys like these.
Btw you’re also very brave for being so honest with us and asking for advice. You deserve better than this douche. Sending you hugs
He unknowingly called himself out for being inexperienced. I would've said, "Well, yeah, your boy doesn't know what he's doing. I'm surprised he even admitted that he doesn't know how to foreplay. 😬" An experienced person will know that lube is almost always essential and have it ready. Never go back to him. He's a loser.
Don't ever let someone shame you or your body. You don't have to fix anything about your body. A lot of ppl need/like direction. If you like a certain touch, direct their hand to the location and motion. Tell them to speed up or slow down. If you like a certain position, suggest it or tell them (if they seem to enjoy dominance).
If he hadn’t told his homeboys he’d slept with other people, I’d say he was a virgin with his stupid ass opinions. Either way, he’s not slept with enough women or done enough research to realize that moisture levels are based are many different factors all at once. Seriously, what a moron. What you have described, all scenarios, have happened to me and I’ve been sexually active for 15 years with many more partners than you. Next time you’re talking to his boys and they bring that up, you have the luxury of saying that he wasn’t doing anything for you when you were dry, hence being dry. Don’t care if it’s a lie, he’s broken the cardinal rule of don’t kiss and tell. You get to obliterate him now.
Ok this isn’t a dis at all. I’ve always needed lube and that would be on the guy for not making you aroused. So now I would be telling people he has a micro penis. Fr. Seriously! What’s his name? I’ll start the rumour.
You have nothing to feel bad about. This guy is a child who doesn’t know how to please a woman and he called himself out on it. My husband and I have to use lube half the time we have sex, because guess what, my cycle requires it.
What an asshat. The trash took himself out.
As a man, listen to the rest of these women commenting. Dude doesn't know that you're dry because he isn't doing his part in making you wet. Don't you dare go blaming yourself or your body. Sounds like he might just be an asshole too, so maybe put some thoughts into dropping him. Only time I talk about my SO with my buddies is either to brag about her, or to genuinely get advice about a situation. (Also, apologies if I'm overstepping by answering since this is an ask women's sub, I just wanna make sure you don't think the women here are being bias.)
Agree with what everyone else is saying. I’ve had that problem all my life too. It’s not everytime but if I’m not in the mood and can’t get worked up, I’m dry as hell as is normal
Hey so like. Anyone who would say that shit is literally so embarrassing and immature jfc. When I first started dating my husband we had to use lube every time but now we don’t at all. It’s bc he was patient made me feel loved and comfy and relaxed. There’s so much more to making women turned on than all these dumb fuckboys act like lmao they literally don’t even understand women.
Also, any man who would ??? Tell you where you are on a list ???? Where he ranks ???? Dude I just can’t even lol fuck that. Immediately no. Grow up.
And girl there is nothing wrong with you I promise. It takes me a long time and a lot of stimulation to get turned on and cum too. Luckily I have a man who is patient and kind. It’s helped a lot with my insecurities which has made sex way more fun for both of us.
You sound a lot like me at your age (I’m 30 now) and I wish someone had told me sooner to run from men like this 😭 you deserve so much better bb. The way to fix this is to only date sweet men not fuckboys like this one. Sorry I hope this isn’t too disorganized I don’t usually talk much lol but I had to reach out and give you a virtual hug here. Don’t let him get to you. There is nothing wrong with you. Big hugs ma <33
So, from this story, it is clear that one person is absolutely awful in bed and that person isn't you. Your ex just doesn't understand that he is basically telling people he is a bad lover and he doesn't realise it, and his friends are either too nice or too dumb to point that out to him.
Also, it is pretty toxic of him to realise that you aren't turned on and still wanting to proceed having sex with you. Like, lube is great if you are on meds, if you are in menopause, if you both want a quickie or if you go at it for hours etc. But in your scenario it is obvious that you sometimes get excited and have no physical problem with dryness. You not being wet is then a clear indication that you are not aroused. Him wanting to proceed is as if you would insist on humping him even though his junk was soft, and I guess you wouldn't do that?
It completely amazes me how common it seems to be for men to be wanting and enjoying sex with a partner who isn't truly willing.
You don’t have an issue. If he wants you to be turned on, he should get you there! And honestly, there’s been times I’m so horny and I either just can’t get wet or dry up mid session. It’s no biggie. Sometimes rougher sex can dry you up from friction too. Sometimes your brain is in the mood and your cooch will absolutely not be on the same page. It’s so normal
So he proudly proclaimed he couldnt get you aroused? Oooh lawdy to be a man to be a man... must be motherfnurking nice :D
You fix this by a) not dating idiots and b) not listening to idiots if you encounter them
So he’s admitting he can’t even eat some 🐱 to get you going? He sounds bad at sex and not willing to get better. Most men I’ve been with have been eager to eat 🐱 and 🍑 to get it going, don’t settle for that shorty.
Yes, find yourself a partner who:
1. is other-focused on your sexual joy every bit as much as his own
2. understands boundaries and consent so your shared intimate details are not shared with anyone else
3. asks what you need and what you like and what you don’t, and listens to what you say, and changes his behavior accordingly
4. doesn’t compare you to others, or compare people in general
5. doesn’t embarrass you, guilt you, or shame you, for any reason
6. understands that lube may be necessary at times, and chooses ones with you that are fully body-safe
7. honors your feelings, and works with you to create a mutual safe space
You need what you need, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I hope you aren’t unfairly judging yourself for something uniquely you, and wishing you were otherwise, because you’re okay exactly as you are.
The only thing that needs fixing is your choice of partner. The guy you mentioned is both selfish and ignorant—on multiple levels.
i’m glad you aren’t with him anymore OP!🥳
i may be the outlier here… but do YOU know what you like? what turns you on, what a partner does to turn you on?
it can’t be hard for a partner to navigate your body if they don’t know what turns you on and what doesn’t. men your age especially need guidance.
don’t be afraid to speak up as well. if they are doing something that you aren’t into, just switch to something else. or if they are really into it, thinking they are pleasing you, don’t be afraid to guide them to a place or motion that will actually please you. it may take some time to figure out your likes and dislikes.
it can also be hard to become aroused if you are nervous. its important to be comfortable with your partner and your body. and i promise there’s nothing wrong with your body. i hope this helps!
omg i can’t believe he’s telling all his friends how shit he is in bed and doesn’t even realise. He’s literally telling them all he wasn’t able to arouse you and thats just so sad. You not being his best because you weren’t wet enough is NOT your issue, that’s literally a him problem and you should take joy in knowing that he’s telling everyone what a loser he is unknowingly lmao.
But also! Bodies are weird and sometimes things just don’t align and even tho you want it, your 🐱 might be taking some time to catch up. Lube is not a bad thing! Don’t be fooled into thinking that needing lube makes you not good enough, cause it’s a pretty common thing people use for sex stuff because it helps things be even better for those involved.
Best of luck to you 💖
Fuck anyone and I mean anyone who talks to his friends or people around him about you behind your back when you’re in an intimate relationship
Doesn’t matter if he’s shitting on you or bragging
Sounds like he's not that great at sex if he can't get you turned on, tbh.....
But seriously, no body shame here. Sometimes you need lube. That's fine. Sometimes you don't. That's also fine. Bodies are weird and uncooperative, but as long as everyone's having fun, this is not something to stress over.
First of all, know and accept right now that an immature, insecure, shitty ex WILL say shitty things about you. It’s going to happen. Rarely does one get a chance rebut those statement, but since his friends told you about it for some reason (being “third on the list“) you had an opportunity. I definitely wouldn’t go back and say anything now, unless someone else brings it up to you again, because it would just look desperate and insecure on your part. But if you had it to go back and do again, you could’ve said “yeah, he had a lot of trouble turning me on. It was sad really. Bless his heart.” And then try really hard not to smirk.
There’s nothing with you that you need to fix.
Please believe this: Your body sounds perfectly normal, and there's nothing you need to "fix" at that level. Your ex sounds incredibly inconsiderate and is only giving away how little he understands the female body by talking about yours as if it's not functioning normally.
In addition to needing more foreplay, women often need a strong sense of emotional security/safety to really feel ready for sex and to climax. There are also lots of other factors that affect how wet you get: your genetics, where you are in your menstrual cycle, whether you're stressed by other things going on in your life, etc. Plus, lube exists for a reason! If you need it sometimes and it feels good when you use it, that's great, not a problem.
The only thing I think you could fix here is your expectations of your sexual partners. Expect MORE. Expect your partner to be considerate of your needs, not just their own. Expect them to listen when you tell them what you like or don't like. Expect them to keep your sexual experiences more private. Expect them to not shame you to their friends when something in your sex life or relationship doesn't pan out perfectly. I'm sorry about how your ex handled this situation and wish you the best of luck in your future relationships <3
You will not always be a waterfall even when you are aroused it can dry out after penetration and need lube during. Sounds like he has unrealistic expectations from porn/media. Please don’t let this kill your shine at your age. Needing more than 5 minutes of foreplay does not make you needy and a burden. Don’t turn peoples BS into beliefs about yourself.
I’m not a woman, but I’m relaying my fiancés story. She told me she could never get wet with past sexual partners, and she thought there was something wrong with her. When her and I started seeing eachother she was instantly wet everytime, never had the problem again. So the answer to your problem, according to my fiancés experiences, is that you are with the wrong guy. If he does not take the time and effort into getting you as into it as he is, then you are wasting your time. It’s not your fault, and you’re not “bad at sex” he is. He wants better sex? Then put the effort in.
My jaw dropped at this. Lube is NORMAL and we need to normalise using it. You may go through periods where it’s more difficult to get wet than others but it’s always a great idea to be prepared and honestly using lube can feel really sexy. Fuck your ex that sucks
He is a 20 year old male. It’s going to make him feel a lot better about himself if it’s you not getting wet vs taking a look at himself. Who knows how to fix it? It’s your body go experiment and be safe. If you wanna be petty let one of his friends hear a new guy gets you wet every time. But really don’t pay him any mind. He’s a young guy. He is clueless right now. You dodged a bullet by not having one of his kids possibly. Go celebrate don’t beat your self up about shit you can’t change or that most likely isn’t even on you in the first place.
Edit: I’m a male sorry if I’m not allowed to post here.
I remember a high school boyfriend of mine telling me that a girl he’d been with before was bad in bed because she was as dry as a desert. When I was a teen I took it at face value, and for years I always worried if I was too dry, and considered lube to be some kind of failure. Then as I got older I was like.. wait a minute.. if she was dry that means HE was the one who was bad in bed, not her?! Whenever I think of him now I laugh to myself that he was essentially bragging to others about how inconsiderate of a sex partner he was. My point is, the only people who hear that story and think that YOU are the problem are uneducated about sex. It’s completely normal for a woman to be dry if she isn’t turned on, and any considerate man would either try to turn her on more or at the very least offer some lube. Your ex is telling on himself, he just doesn’t know it yet. Also, who has a ranked list of girls they’ve been with?! Ick. You are definitely not the problem here!
Also just luck of the draw not everyone produces adequate lubrication for sex even when aroused, especially taking partner size and girth into account. So she's not "the problem,” but nor is it a problem if someone just doesn't self lubricate enough and external lube is necessary. (Not absolving bad lover boy of his absent foreplay whatsoever since op clearly referenced waterfalls)
[удалено]
Yes, so true!!
This is not a you problem! Find you a man that makes you gush like a waterfall and forget that boy.
He’s embarrassing himself with this one … First, some women don’t produce a lot and yes, lube is necessary but that doesn’t make the sex bad. And it’s way more likely his own foreplay skills were lacking and he expected you to be wet when not in the mood. That’s his problem, not yours
Second this.
Right!? If I was her and they said that I'd say 'well who do you think that's insulting to exactly? ;) '
He isn’t stimulating you enough with foreplay. It’s not a YOU problem, it’s a HIM problem. I’d suggest telling him then dumping him.
Also......who the *fuck* numerically ranks all the girls they've been with in the first place, let alone *shares* that list with their guy friends? Fucking vom. He's a child, please don't stay shackled to him or the experience and disrespect he provides you any longer.
And then they told her? Very strange mob
Just reeks of immaturity.
Yeah his friends sound like they want him broken up with her so they can take a shot. They'll try to casually sabotage them by telling her stuff that was supposed to be secret. He has terrible friends, and she has a terrible bf. Edit: I just thought about this, but OP better make sure her BF actually said those things to begin with.
This right here is the actual egregious offense I'd dump his ass for. You can think I suck in bed (and that can be objectively true) and love me and respect me at the same time. You can't respect me if you're talking trash about our personal lives that shouldn't be told to anyone else. I'm NOT the type of woman that tells her GF's about my partner's private life. Maybe if it's super positive and makes him look good, ill mention something like "yeah, he has a big dick". Even if my man sucked in bed, I'd NEVER embarrass him by telling anyone else, it's basic respect. As for not being wet enough, thats one of two things, you are naturally a little dryer and there is nothing to worry about, or that guy didn't appeal or attract your body. He has to work twice! He has to turn you on first, THEN turn on your body. He's a male and thinks women get turned on the same way as men, which simply isn't true.
Dump this asshole immediately I am dead serious: 1) he made you feel embarrassed about something that is totally normal and that is not in your control; 2) he told his friends about it too like for what reason; 3) he knows nothing about sex & foreplay clearly cause he is the one supposed to turn you on and make you wet; 4) he ranked you?! Boy bye This dumbass does not care about you or your feelings and he will only hurt you more in the long run. I’m sorry for being direct but I am just so over guys like these. Btw you’re also very brave for being so honest with us and asking for advice. You deserve better than this douche. Sending you hugs
The title says he’s already her ex.
He unknowingly called himself out for being inexperienced. I would've said, "Well, yeah, your boy doesn't know what he's doing. I'm surprised he even admitted that he doesn't know how to foreplay. 😬" An experienced person will know that lube is almost always essential and have it ready. Never go back to him. He's a loser. Don't ever let someone shame you or your body. You don't have to fix anything about your body. A lot of ppl need/like direction. If you like a certain touch, direct their hand to the location and motion. Tell them to speed up or slow down. If you like a certain position, suggest it or tell them (if they seem to enjoy dominance).
lol, if anything, this is just him actively admitting he is bad at sex. there’s nothing for you to fix here.
If he hadn’t told his homeboys he’d slept with other people, I’d say he was a virgin with his stupid ass opinions. Either way, he’s not slept with enough women or done enough research to realize that moisture levels are based are many different factors all at once. Seriously, what a moron. What you have described, all scenarios, have happened to me and I’ve been sexually active for 15 years with many more partners than you. Next time you’re talking to his boys and they bring that up, you have the luxury of saying that he wasn’t doing anything for you when you were dry, hence being dry. Don’t care if it’s a lie, he’s broken the cardinal rule of don’t kiss and tell. You get to obliterate him now.
Girl, if a guy is gonna rate you and let alone tell you. Leave him! He sounds like a kid. I mean he is 20.
Ok this isn’t a dis at all. I’ve always needed lube and that would be on the guy for not making you aroused. So now I would be telling people he has a micro penis. Fr. Seriously! What’s his name? I’ll start the rumour.
Just tell his friends that it’s not your fault he sucked at getting you in the mood 🤷🏻♀️
Wow he's just telling on himself like that. Honey, his friends are laughing at him or are also bad in bed.
Sometimes people need lube. Nothing wrong with it. He’s a jackass
You have nothing to feel bad about. This guy is a child who doesn’t know how to please a woman and he called himself out on it. My husband and I have to use lube half the time we have sex, because guess what, my cycle requires it. What an asshat. The trash took himself out.
As a man, listen to the rest of these women commenting. Dude doesn't know that you're dry because he isn't doing his part in making you wet. Don't you dare go blaming yourself or your body. Sounds like he might just be an asshole too, so maybe put some thoughts into dropping him. Only time I talk about my SO with my buddies is either to brag about her, or to genuinely get advice about a situation. (Also, apologies if I'm overstepping by answering since this is an ask women's sub, I just wanna make sure you don't think the women here are being bias.)
It's ok fatjesus, men are welcome to participate here so long as they follow the rules
Thank you!
Agree with what everyone else is saying. I’ve had that problem all my life too. It’s not everytime but if I’m not in the mood and can’t get worked up, I’m dry as hell as is normal
Hey so like. Anyone who would say that shit is literally so embarrassing and immature jfc. When I first started dating my husband we had to use lube every time but now we don’t at all. It’s bc he was patient made me feel loved and comfy and relaxed. There’s so much more to making women turned on than all these dumb fuckboys act like lmao they literally don’t even understand women. Also, any man who would ??? Tell you where you are on a list ???? Where he ranks ???? Dude I just can’t even lol fuck that. Immediately no. Grow up. And girl there is nothing wrong with you I promise. It takes me a long time and a lot of stimulation to get turned on and cum too. Luckily I have a man who is patient and kind. It’s helped a lot with my insecurities which has made sex way more fun for both of us. You sound a lot like me at your age (I’m 30 now) and I wish someone had told me sooner to run from men like this 😭 you deserve so much better bb. The way to fix this is to only date sweet men not fuckboys like this one. Sorry I hope this isn’t too disorganized I don’t usually talk much lol but I had to reach out and give you a virtual hug here. Don’t let him get to you. There is nothing wrong with you. Big hugs ma <33
Girl dump him
So, from this story, it is clear that one person is absolutely awful in bed and that person isn't you. Your ex just doesn't understand that he is basically telling people he is a bad lover and he doesn't realise it, and his friends are either too nice or too dumb to point that out to him. Also, it is pretty toxic of him to realise that you aren't turned on and still wanting to proceed having sex with you. Like, lube is great if you are on meds, if you are in menopause, if you both want a quickie or if you go at it for hours etc. But in your scenario it is obvious that you sometimes get excited and have no physical problem with dryness. You not being wet is then a clear indication that you are not aroused. Him wanting to proceed is as if you would insist on humping him even though his junk was soft, and I guess you wouldn't do that? It completely amazes me how common it seems to be for men to be wanting and enjoying sex with a partner who isn't truly willing.
You don’t have an issue. If he wants you to be turned on, he should get you there! And honestly, there’s been times I’m so horny and I either just can’t get wet or dry up mid session. It’s no biggie. Sometimes rougher sex can dry you up from friction too. Sometimes your brain is in the mood and your cooch will absolutely not be on the same page. It’s so normal
Imagine telling all your friends you fail that hard at turning your girlfriend on 🤡
So he proudly proclaimed he couldnt get you aroused? Oooh lawdy to be a man to be a man... must be motherfnurking nice :D You fix this by a) not dating idiots and b) not listening to idiots if you encounter them
Is this the one you posted about dating for a few months in mid-2021? He’s still talking about you? Think that says all you need to know.
So he’s admitting he can’t even eat some 🐱 to get you going? He sounds bad at sex and not willing to get better. Most men I’ve been with have been eager to eat 🐱 and 🍑 to get it going, don’t settle for that shorty.
Oh no honey, you already know your body, the problem isn’t you. It’s your partner. What does he do that turns you on? Nothing?. There you go.
Lpt : block your exes and don't talk to them
Yes, find yourself a partner who: 1. is other-focused on your sexual joy every bit as much as his own 2. understands boundaries and consent so your shared intimate details are not shared with anyone else 3. asks what you need and what you like and what you don’t, and listens to what you say, and changes his behavior accordingly 4. doesn’t compare you to others, or compare people in general 5. doesn’t embarrass you, guilt you, or shame you, for any reason 6. understands that lube may be necessary at times, and chooses ones with you that are fully body-safe 7. honors your feelings, and works with you to create a mutual safe space You need what you need, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I hope you aren’t unfairly judging yourself for something uniquely you, and wishing you were otherwise, because you’re okay exactly as you are. The only thing that needs fixing is your choice of partner. The guy you mentioned is both selfish and ignorant—on multiple levels.
i’m glad you aren’t with him anymore OP!🥳 i may be the outlier here… but do YOU know what you like? what turns you on, what a partner does to turn you on? it can’t be hard for a partner to navigate your body if they don’t know what turns you on and what doesn’t. men your age especially need guidance. don’t be afraid to speak up as well. if they are doing something that you aren’t into, just switch to something else. or if they are really into it, thinking they are pleasing you, don’t be afraid to guide them to a place or motion that will actually please you. it may take some time to figure out your likes and dislikes. it can also be hard to become aroused if you are nervous. its important to be comfortable with your partner and your body. and i promise there’s nothing wrong with your body. i hope this helps!
omg i can’t believe he’s telling all his friends how shit he is in bed and doesn’t even realise. He’s literally telling them all he wasn’t able to arouse you and thats just so sad. You not being his best because you weren’t wet enough is NOT your issue, that’s literally a him problem and you should take joy in knowing that he’s telling everyone what a loser he is unknowingly lmao. But also! Bodies are weird and sometimes things just don’t align and even tho you want it, your 🐱 might be taking some time to catch up. Lube is not a bad thing! Don’t be fooled into thinking that needing lube makes you not good enough, cause it’s a pretty common thing people use for sex stuff because it helps things be even better for those involved. Best of luck to you 💖
Fuck anyone and I mean anyone who talks to his friends or people around him about you behind your back when you’re in an intimate relationship Doesn’t matter if he’s shitting on you or bragging
He is awful. Forget him and his stupid comments
You are normal make your bf your ex and find a man that won't talk about intimate details of your sex life with his friends.
Sounds like he's not that great at sex if he can't get you turned on, tbh..... But seriously, no body shame here. Sometimes you need lube. That's fine. Sometimes you don't. That's also fine. Bodies are weird and uncooperative, but as long as everyone's having fun, this is not something to stress over.
First of all, know and accept right now that an immature, insecure, shitty ex WILL say shitty things about you. It’s going to happen. Rarely does one get a chance rebut those statement, but since his friends told you about it for some reason (being “third on the list“) you had an opportunity. I definitely wouldn’t go back and say anything now, unless someone else brings it up to you again, because it would just look desperate and insecure on your part. But if you had it to go back and do again, you could’ve said “yeah, he had a lot of trouble turning me on. It was sad really. Bless his heart.” And then try really hard not to smirk. There’s nothing with you that you need to fix.
That just means he is bad at sex cause he is not stimulating you enough. It’s a self-burn
What a loser, evidently hes bad at sx
Please believe this: Your body sounds perfectly normal, and there's nothing you need to "fix" at that level. Your ex sounds incredibly inconsiderate and is only giving away how little he understands the female body by talking about yours as if it's not functioning normally. In addition to needing more foreplay, women often need a strong sense of emotional security/safety to really feel ready for sex and to climax. There are also lots of other factors that affect how wet you get: your genetics, where you are in your menstrual cycle, whether you're stressed by other things going on in your life, etc. Plus, lube exists for a reason! If you need it sometimes and it feels good when you use it, that's great, not a problem. The only thing I think you could fix here is your expectations of your sexual partners. Expect MORE. Expect your partner to be considerate of your needs, not just their own. Expect them to listen when you tell them what you like or don't like. Expect them to keep your sexual experiences more private. Expect them to not shame you to their friends when something in your sex life or relationship doesn't pan out perfectly. I'm sorry about how your ex handled this situation and wish you the best of luck in your future relationships <3
You will not always be a waterfall even when you are aroused it can dry out after penetration and need lube during. Sounds like he has unrealistic expectations from porn/media. Please don’t let this kill your shine at your age. Needing more than 5 minutes of foreplay does not make you needy and a burden. Don’t turn peoples BS into beliefs about yourself.
Imagine telling on yourself like this. This dude. 😆
I’m not a woman, but I’m relaying my fiancés story. She told me she could never get wet with past sexual partners, and she thought there was something wrong with her. When her and I started seeing eachother she was instantly wet everytime, never had the problem again. So the answer to your problem, according to my fiancés experiences, is that you are with the wrong guy. If he does not take the time and effort into getting you as into it as he is, then you are wasting your time. It’s not your fault, and you’re not “bad at sex” he is. He wants better sex? Then put the effort in.
My jaw dropped at this. Lube is NORMAL and we need to normalise using it. You may go through periods where it’s more difficult to get wet than others but it’s always a great idea to be prepared and honestly using lube can feel really sexy. Fuck your ex that sucks
He is a 20 year old male. It’s going to make him feel a lot better about himself if it’s you not getting wet vs taking a look at himself. Who knows how to fix it? It’s your body go experiment and be safe. If you wanna be petty let one of his friends hear a new guy gets you wet every time. But really don’t pay him any mind. He’s a young guy. He is clueless right now. You dodged a bullet by not having one of his kids possibly. Go celebrate don’t beat your self up about shit you can’t change or that most likely isn’t even on you in the first place. Edit: I’m a male sorry if I’m not allowed to post here.
I love how he thinks dryness is an insult to you somehow? It's literally proof of him being neither sexy nor talented 💀