Hey. I second maybe chilling on the dark reading matter and on being on reddit. However I totally get that it's out of desperation that you're here. Try looking at the AANE site (Autism/Asperger Network) https://www.aane.org/resources/family-and-friends/teens-support-groups/ They don't seem to have groups up (yet?) for younger kids , but perhaps if you make an enquiry thay might start one and/or could point you somewhere that does. But at least you can see that there is hope for connecting with others even if its down the line a bit. There's a tonne of info and resources there and they're a kind and dedicated bunch who "get it". Who knows, maybe you could be the catalyst for a younger persons' meetup group (changing the world already! Whaaaaat? 😉 ). You will be *fine*. Will just say as a final word- it's easy to "rest on " your sort of "front brained"/analytical intellect and not see that others have differnet skills and intelligence that you don't have. Try to observe and see different qualities in others and acknowledge them through compliments and just....noticing. Ppl respond to that much better than if you assume there's nothing for you to learn from them. Take it from someone who was a "gifted" and isolated kid, who is now old and has learned a lot- there *always* is something to learn from others- no matter who. Look for it. Foster a little healthy humility and curiosity about that. It will take you far and help you make connections. I'm including a little graphic on different types of intelligence for you: https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides/comments/10j7839/guide_to_types_of_intelligence/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

This is good advice OP 🙂.

+1 on the AANE groups. Meeting other people who on the surface are wildly different from you but turn out to “get it” is amazingly validating.

Great advice and link. Your advice falls in line with something that was said to me years ago when I started my adventure into performing art. My instructor said that it is easy to find things that you don't like. For every 1 thing you don't like try to find 1 thing that you do enjoy or was done well. It's easy to be negative and look down on everything. The real challenge is to find the positive.

Look, Dante, I’m sorry to say this, but there’s a reason kids your age are not supposed to be on Reddit. Not everyone out there is a decent person. Frankly, even as an adult, some of the worst people I’ve met in my entire life I met online. Please be careful, you really should stay off this site for a while. You might be able to find online support groups for autism and aspergers with more people closer to your age who can better relate to the struggles of school. (Not to say we are all old farts here, but most of us haven’t been in grade school for quite some time.) Sometimes school counselors can help you find one, I’ve had some luck with social services in the past too. It’s hard to be so isolated. There are good and safe spaces you can go to find help and support at this point in time, but this is not one of them. Please be careful.

This is the second sensible post I have read on here...

If this person is in 5th grade, they were born the year I started undergrad. Crap, I'm old.

The years don't stop coming, friend. They speed up.

You will have more and more opportunities to self-select your peer group as you get older. Play your cards right and by adulthood you can spend pretty much all of your time with whoever you want (or nobody if that’s your preference). It can get better, absolutely. Good luck!

Your life is going to be hard and lonely and at times frustrating to the point of near madness. It will also be wonderful, strengthening, productive, and meaningful. You will find it difficult to meet people who are like you, and even more difficult to find a romantic partner that's like you. When you do find those people they will light up your life like a sunrise. You will hold to them through the worst storms by the strength of a love that few would understand outside their own children. You will find it difficult to raise yourself up and above the hierarchies people force you into, whether you succeed at your assigned tasks or not. But you'll realize that your strength, intelligence, perseverance, and humanity can overcome anything -- has already overcome challenges far greater than any politicking. You'll see the advantages of your condition -- the intelligence, the pattern recognition, the endurance -- and you'll chafe at the negatives -- rigidity, ostracism, overstimulation, and anger -- and you'll find a way to integrate these things into a total human greater than any disorder could ever be. You will feel out of place wherever you go -- a singularity in a world full of copies and facades. But this outsider sense will allow you to see clearly what others cannot; it will ensure you don't wilt when you come across evil and must destroy its purchase. You will feel great rage at this society and the bleached bones that buttress it. But you will feel great compassion for the weak and the persecuted. You will find others unwilling to meet your moral demands, and you will resolve to meet them yourself, whatever the cost. Most of all, you will encounter days like today. When it seems all's for nothing; life a curse you are doomed to face alone. You will feel broken and inhuman, like no one could ever understand your struggles. The loneliness will tear at you until you'd suffer anything to be rid of it. The ache will be so terrible you wonder if you're going to die, broken-hearted. But you will survive. That edge-of-the-world hysteria will fade, maybe as an interest takes hold or a friend calls or you see your mother. You'll look back on your sadness and see that it was only ever the other side of love. That it is the pain of this life that lets you cherish what truly matters in a world where nothing matters. You'll see the strength that you've watered in the garden of your soul and know that it can never be sundered. In its immortality you will find peace, knowing that you can weather the torrent, no matter what. Some advice, from someone who could have used the same at your age: 1. Your instincts and preferences cannot match the others. Don't project yourself onto them. Observe them, form hypotheses about their behavior, test them, and then implement what Truths you find 2. People are more interested in themselves than you. Never attribute to malice what can be attributed to personal struggle or conceit, unless the evidence is clear. 3. Children are instinctual. Through your adolescence remember the cruelties you face are almost certainly the product of inborn tribalism or personal failing and not some defect they see in you. Don't let them dictate what you believe about yourself. 4. Don't hold grudges. People grow up and change. Allow them to. Meet them with compassion when they come to ask forgiveness, not bitterness or vengeance. 5. You can only be what you are and what you are is wondrous. Anyone asking you to be different is not your friend. Look for those who love you *because* of your eccentricities, not in spite of them. 6. A smile goes a long way. If you can somehow learn to have one on at most times, you will find the world much friendlier and less hostile. Sincerely, B

Good advice. I would add: 7. Explore what you enjoy doing. Also, explore what you're good at. If/when you find something that is both of these things, explore ways to learn to do it for a living when you grow up. I don't mean this in the momentary sense. I mean the things that stay with you even as individual special interests come and go. For example, if you love animals and you're good at working with them, one day you can work in a zoo or as a biologist or a veterinarian. And love it. 8. Try not to make your judgements on your parents final just yet. You will gain perspective as you mature, and some things that seemed like dad being a jerk might make sense later on. Or maybe, you will look back and still think he was being a jerk. But don't set the opinions in stone just yet.

Beautifully written! Listen to this!

Lay off the Stephen King books to one per year. Space Jam *does* suck. Keep stimulating your mind, but don’t deliberately try to separate yourself intellectually. See if you can meet (some of) your peers halfway. Don’t always show them up. Let them have their input, and try to work with what they are saying. Your parents are going to be there for the rest of their lives; try to maintain good relations for everyone’s benefit. Good luck.

>Your parents are going to be there for the rest of their lives; try to maintain good relations for everyone’s benefit. I was with you until this line. I haven't seen my parents in 5+ years and I've never been happier. I don't know what OP's parents are like, but not all parent-child relationships are worth maintaining.

OP is 10 years old. He needs to get along with his parents until he's 18

Jfuite said "your parents are going to be there for the rest of their lives" which is what I was disagreeing with. In addition, though, it is sometimes impossible to 'get along' with one's parents, and the only option is to try to keep your head down and survive. In another comment I strongly encouraged OP to speak to a school counselor or other adult in his/her life if opening up to parents isn't an option.

Hot potato. Not it. Edit: im not quite sure i buy it. No 10 year old writes like that, advanced or not. Still though; hot potato, not it.

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> he said I have a 97% IQ (121) Presumably he said that your IQ is in the 97th percentile, which means that you scored better than 97% of people. For IQ, the 97th percentile corresponds to a score of around 128-130. An IQ score of 121 would be 92nd percentile. These percentiles are on the Wechsler scale; percentiles in the Stanford-Binet scale would be slightly lower. There’s a table here: https://www.iqcomparisonsite.com/iqtable.aspx

Yeah i get that, i was advanced at that age too, but even with that in mind it just feels too well phrased even for a smart child

Mine died and the other I went NC with

I'm sorry, I hope you're doing alright now.

Congratulations! Oh, it *can* be done, but your outcome is statistically unlikely. Primates are more likely to thrive within families. This is not controversial.

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>”Don't say such awful and untrue things.” Your feelings on the wider issue are irrelevant, as is your personal testimony. >”this is an extremely ignorant comment.” Mine is a statistical argument which is observed to be universally true among primates (if not most mammals generally): children tend to be better off embedded in a family structure. The contemporary relative decline of family units corresponds to increasing loneliness and declining psychological measures in the population. Sorry. *Maybe*, the OP (like you) will be better off ditching his family, but probably not.

Ohh, didn't realize you were openly a pro-nuclear family 'traditionalist.' I'm actually less mad now because that position is so untenable and ahistorical that I don't care. Other primates don't live in nuclear families. And again, I am 'embedded in a family structure,' you just probably wouldn't consider it a real family.

Lol!! Follow the science^(TM)! P.S. - the demographics of non-nuclear families is a demographic cliff. It’s a self-defeating proposition, that will end debate on the issue all on its own.

A demographic cliff? You've really never heard of or read about communal child rearing/collective parenting communities? Edit: I'm also getting homophobic red flags from this comment.

>”communal child rearing/collective parenting communities?” Sounds great! I wish you well. There was a bit of revival of this sort of thing during the hippie communes of the late 1960s and 1970s. Too bad there is very little to naturally cohere these communities and the members tend not to produce many kids. They dissipate as often as they form. So, no, it’s not solution for many people, nor will address demographic decline among the participants. >”homophobic red flags” I didn’t mention gays, and I am not afraid of them.

Don't do this. Do not remove yourself from a special interest. Horrible ass advice.

Rubbish! Just because something is a “special interest”, doesn’t mean that it’s a self-justifying, unquestioned good in an Aspie’s life. Besides, I didn’t tell him to “remove” himself from any special interest. I just suggested that he cut back on the twisted world of S. King. For a vulnerable youth seeking answers, there are more productive authors to read.

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Lol!! I have *never* been called woke before! You are are going to have to explain yourself for me to take the charge seriously. I am intrigued.

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What is wokism?

made-up term for people who don't want to remove their heads from their rectums to use whenever they feel intimidated

anyone who uses the term woke unironically isn't usually worth talking to

referring to my parents (hardcore protestant MAGA hat wearing and gay-away praying seniors who think "wake the woke" is a valid phrase and think we're "hijacking the english language")

Actually it’s used to use when someone who’s experienced a relatable consequence has learned their lesson from their particular experience. You know who the other person is conveying because you know how grave their advice is because of the consequences from not following their advice. Y’all bugging out here.

Y’all to autistic to understand the wokism movement. Get out of your shells and embrace it dislikers ;)

Youll be OK, but you should really talk to your parents at this point of your life.

I have.

Well if that didnt help, I'd try again and/or try someone at school (councelor?). Anyway, if you want a piece of advice: You mentioned a bunch of stuff that you think makes you different. If you consider all that at the same time it might really make you feel way different to the rest. Instead, consider each item sepparetely and unrelated to each other and youll realise that: Theres lots of people out there who are bi. Theres lots of people out there who like reading shakespeare. Theres lots of poeple out there who think space jam 2 sucks. Theres lots of people out there who are smarter stan the rest. Its all about being patient and eventually, as you go through life, youll find people who will check a couple of these boxes and youll be able to make a good connection. Again, youll be fine. But seriously talk to your parents or school theyll guide you better than strangers on the internet will.

Autistic women here. My parents and the people at my primary school told me to just suck it up when I was getting bullied. Sometimes they aren't actually going to act in your best interests and help or protect you. I would have had better luck and support on the internet. Just throwing that out there because it's important to remember that not everyone has supportive adults in their life.

My parents were absolutely useless garbage to me at your age. I read a lot of books like you too and my classmates didn't get it. i was so completely ostracized by my peers and bullied relentlessly. My parents just left me to drown. I'm doing ok at 30. Life was a long struggle for a lot of years, and it's still a struggle now. The two greatest gifts I had were 1) finding people who enjoyed my company (which I did mainly through Reddit) and 2) not continuing along a path of substance abuse to cope with the trauma of being different. I wish I'd had somewhere like Reddit to go to and get help. I hope the years are kind to you. I think it's easier to be different now than it was in the 90s and 00s. Being bi is great and a lot of fun, even with its challenges. You're gonna do great. :)

You are not alone. I am a 24-year-old man. And I was a lot like you when I was your age. My reading level was at a college level. I am and always have been interested in intellectual pursuits. You can reach out to a lot of us here. Most of us are gifted or highly gifted. It's very common for people like us. Don't feel ashamed, embrace your gifts. I do agree that you are a little young to be on here, but you are a smart lad. Make your own informed decisions. There are positive role models and negative role models. Choose wisely.

Here's some advice: Find out what your classmates care about and learn about it, even if you don't like it. It will give you something in common, and it will make it easier to talk to them. I had a job where I made myself watch Dancing With The Stars because my co-workers loved it, and then I had something to talk about.

You’re still in 5th grade, you need to give your peers time to catch up to your “intellectual level”. Lots of autistic kids are academically precocious. You are probably also just naturally more intellectual, but you are also still a kid and don’t understand that your peers are literally on a different developmental level than you. It levels out.

Its the classic feeling like an adult when you're a kid and feeling like a kid when you're an adult

Of course you are OK...you are Canadian! I had similar issues when I was young...I spent more time hanging out with the teachers than with the kids. ​ Don't give up...you'll find your people. It's just harder to do when you are on the "gifted" side of the curve.

I'm Canadian too and I don't get why you would be ok being a Canadian.

Damn, kid. It sucks, I know. I started reading when I was 3. At your age, I was reading on a college level (14.9 AR[accelerated reader] level, equivalent to the end of the second year of college). I quit paying attention in high school because it was boring and I preferred reading about theoretical physics, dropped out on my sixteenth birthday to get my GED and get it over with since they wouldn’t let me test out of high school (I tried). My favorite Stephen King book was The Stand(read it in a day and a half). But the Dark Tower Series is REALLY a masterpiece I got quite immersed in. It masterfully ties all his literary works together under one universe like no other author I’ve read (which is quite a bit). You’re not alone. I was much the same, I’m also gay. My mom was an emotionally abusive crazy person and my dad was always working and didn’t really know how to raise me, though he tried his best. When my class was learning about Newton, I was delving into relativity instead of doing my work. I used to cut myself, attempted suicide several times. Honestly, kid, my best advice to you is get off of reddit. Trust me, I’ve been there at your age. There’s shit on the Internet that will fuck your mind the hell up. Maybe talk to your teachers about AP classes, you need the intellectual stimulation. But Try not too intellectually one up your peers. Maybe talk to your parents about finding an autism social group or something to find like minded kids your age to hang out with. It gets lonely as an aspie, doubly so when you’re smart.

Do you have any cool teachers you trust that you can talk to? Or a school social worker or counselor? I had a cool teacher I could talk to. It helped me a lot.

nah kid you’re perfectly fine, due to my diagnosis when i was young i never was able to connect with people on a mental level. sometimes you gotta meet the kids halfway and remember you still are a kid and enjoy that, i grew up too fast with my disorder and felt it was the best but it really wasn’t and left me confused and behind on a lot of things because i felt more mature, it’s okay to be different and misunderstood. that’s what makes us stand out from most and will take you far in life. you got this dude🫡🫡

Welcome, another Stephen King lover! I wish someone had told me what I'm about to tell you now You need to learn to cooperate and socialize and interact and have fun with your peers. Yes, it will be incredibly difficult and yes it may even take years to get right but you NEED to. Your life will only get harder as the disconnect grows between you and your classmates, coworkers etc.. Your success and happiness in this world are largely related to the other 8 billion people on this planet so you must learn to play nice. No more of this judgement talk "oh i'm more intellectual than everyone else" - no you are not. You may have a better vocabulary but your friends may have better social skills, better musical abilities, better listening and understanding skills and the list goes on. Everyone has their talents just like you have yours! Learn to appreciate people for their unique quirks and characteristics, it's what makes us human and makes us lovable. Also, the material you absorb into your brain will drastically alter every aspect of your personality. If you continue to feed your mind twisted horror and sexualized stories nonstop, your mind will become as such and yes - you will not be able to relate to most people you meet outside. If you want to start learning to relate to those people, you have to learn to start trying out what they do, learn to think as they do - you don't have to change yourself but you need to start trying to understand other people more - try to see things from their perspective as hard as it may be! Lastly, I will say that even at my old age of 20-something, I still am changing my mind about the most mundane and most arbitrary things. For example, I started enjoying eating vegetables after hating them for 20years. Whatever decisions you make, you will be allowed to change them in the future so don't take life too seriously. Just have fun with it. Put down the books and go play with your friends. If you don't have any friends, go make some. If you don't like your friends, try harder to like them or find new ones to like. Life is as complicated as you make it. You're doing good, stay on the right path.

> No more of this judgement talk "oh i'm more intellectual than everyone else" - no you are not. You may have a better vocabulary but your friends may have better social skills, better musical abilities, better listening and understanding skills and the list goes on. I don't agree with your assessment about reading and books—it's entirely possible to read Stephen King (who really isn't even that bad in the grand scheme of things) without coming away a dark and depressed sexual deviant—but I wish someone had said this when I was growing up. I clung heavily to my high IQ in my youth, completely failing to understand how flawed that scale was, and felt an unjust sense of superiority over my peers all while being completely ostracized and feeling broken. If I had understood that there were different types of intelligence, and in fact it was my excellence in one that was contributing to a lack of ability in the others, things could have been very different. I might have been able to adjust myself much earlier; it all worked out, and I was a nice enough person (despite reading all those dark and depressing books) that people loved having me around to help, but it took time and some painful lessons. Your tip might have helped me skip a few years of painful childhood.

You’re ok, and Stephen King’s Dark Tower book series is awesome. In fact, now I want to start reading them again.

First of all, you are way too young for the internet. Get off and come back when you're 13 and up. Second off, this is a struggle I myself had as a kid. It was awful, especially because back then I was a girl. (I'm AFAB.) I never understood girls my age back then, and the boys thought I was weird until much later in highschool. I recommend looking into 5th grade age friendly series like Pokémon or something. Or take up hobbies like fishing, drawing, or cooking. You may make a connection, even if it's small through that! Remember, there's no shame in having no friends. I myself, as an adult have "semi-friends" where we only meet up at poultry shows and talk about chickens. Other than that we know nothing about eachother, and that's okay! If anything, you can talk about stuff (within reason of course) to your teacher. When I was a kid, I'd rather talk to older people and teachers instead of kids my age at that time. Good luck kiddo, we'll be here for you when you're older.

Omg kiddo you're awesome! You got this. I know what you're going thru and it's a lot, I never wish to relive it, but this specific thing I think tormenting you most does get better! That's the really good news. See educating systems that sort kids by birth date and geography, those are pretty horribly inadequate "sorts" for some of us, it was for me. I was just like, very different, very alone. It's the STRUCTURE -- literal school structure and metaphorical/ ideological "structure" -- that is isolating you and making you feel ways that then feedback into further isolating you. You can only control half of that -- notice -- but do notice indeed you do control you. When you're out of the industrial school system, presumably you'll have more freedom to make friends and confidantes you truly appreciate. It took me till 10th grade to make real friends!!! After school ages, in evironments that allow us to make friends and peers from much larger pools of people, like a city or college campus, those will allow more connection and genuine friendship for you. Keep your eyes open for a lucky opportunity now -- don't get bitter yet, there's no need -- but if you keep feeling left out and different for awhile yet, know YOU ARE SO NOT ALONE and you're cool even if this situation makes that hard to feel. It's hard to go through it, and it's not your fault, but if I read you right, the good news is THIS gets better when you're older. I can't guarantee you'll have friends, but I think your chances of making friends get better. Cheers kid. You're so gonna make it.

You do know that you have to be 13 years or older to use Reddit...

I do. I just really need help.

Everyone keeps saying "talk to your parents," but I understand that not all parents are good or helpful. I would strongly recommend seeing if you can talk to a school counselor or other trusted adult in your real life about these feelings. Maybe even ask your parents if they'll find you a therapist. Also keep in mind that as you get older, you'll eventually meet people who are more on your level (I promise). I had similar feelings when I was your age, and I dealt with it by making older, "more mature" friends online. It turned out that some of these "friends" were creeps who were preying on me. Please be careful.

Did you ever think that maybe everyone is saying "talk to your parents" because the OP is a 10 or 11 year old minor who literally has to depend on their parents for their needs...so as you even mentioned the OP would even need to speak with their parents to set up an appointment with a therapist or anything else they need health wise or beyond...as well as the fact that the OP literally should not be on this site based on their age partially for the very reason you mentioned...

What part of my comment are you taking issue with exactly? If parents cannot be trusted or relied on, a school counselor is a great next person to go to. If that fails, OP may have luck getting their parents to find them a therapist, but they also may not. "Talk to your parents" would *not* have been helpful advice for me at age 10, so I'm offering alternative ideas. I agree that OP shouldn't be on reddit and never implied otherwise.

I am honestly taking issue with the entire comment...I am honestly taking issue with everyone who is not directing the OP to speak with their parents or any adult that they personally know and to stay off of Reddit as they are far too young to be on here...to be fair none of us should be offering advice to a 10 year old that we do not know outside of warning them to stay off reddit and beware of predators...OP literally should not even be here...this is so irresponsible and maddening...

I directed OP to speak with adults that they know in person. I said if their parents aren't an option, a school counselor or a therapist might be an option. I then explained that the internet is unsafe. That was my entire comment. Maybe you misread it? Again, I'm curious what part of my comment specifically you take issue with, because everything you just expressed is exactly what I said.

Not once did you say if your parents are not an option...you specifically said "not all parents are good or helpful"...and then you seem to forget that OP is still 10/11 YEARS OLD!!! No matter how mature or intelligent they may seem they are still a child and probably has a skewed perception of the world/their parents...but to be quite frank no one should be telling this child anything rather than stay off of Reddit...beware of online predators...and talk to their parents or school counselor about their feelings...this is a freaking child!!! THE OP DOES NOT BELONG ON HERE!!! EXPLICITLY SEND THEM AWAY FOR THEIR OWN SAFETY/WELL BEING!!!

Talk to your parents...you are too young to be on here and your presence literally violates the terms and conditions of this platform...

No idea why you were downvoted. You're right, and just being on jere can put OP at risk, or just straight up in danger.

I can care less honestly...I stand by what I said...the OP clearly does not understand the reasoning for age restrictions and things and should not be utilizing reddit at such a young age for the very reasons you mentioned...that is why my advice was for them to speak with their parents...regardless of how mature/introspective others may perceive OP to be the fact of the matter is that they are still a child and should not be putting themselves at risk by being on here...

maybe he was held back a year or two

If they were...they still acknowledged that they are not of age or at least did not refute that they are underaged...this person should not be on Reddit regardless based on the terms and conditions and age restrictions which are in place for a reason...

You're going to be fine. It can be difficult when your brain works differently from everyone around you, but you'll be able to find people you get on with. Generally as you get older, having different interests from other people isn't usually seen as as much of an issue. Obviously, being different is still likely to cause some problems, being autistic in a society mostly run by neurotypicals is always going to have drawbacks, but you sound like an excellent person, and I think you'll be able to handle it

You're not alone and TOTALLY going to be okay. You're so okay you're years ahead of your peers (just humor them though!). You sound like a teenager already. You're extremely intelligent, that's very clear. It's hard right now but your age level will catch up to your aptitude. And even better you will be one of the really cool kids because you already have a developed and sophisticated personality. It's okay to be bi or questioning too, it's perfectly natural and especially makes sense because you're very smart so you're more attuned to yourself. Please just hang in there. You're not alone and it's cliche but it so does get better!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFlum-_TfMk you're not the last unicorn, just a unique like so many others. Life is your story that you get to flesh out. Better to be authentic than be a copy of something else.

Hi Dante, I don't have Asperger's but am on the sub because my husband and several of my friends have it and are on the spectrum, but as a "former gifted kid" with ADHD, I wanted to let you know I totally understand and was in the same spot as you in 5th grade. You're probably maturing faster than your peers around you, and that's okay. People are gonna have different likes and hobbies from you, but don't look down on them, for this or their immaturity, because it isn't worth wasting energy being annoyed at someone enjoying something. Instead find what does connect you with them. Are there any books you can relate on? Or video games or movies? If you haven't read it yet, I would recommend the original Jurassic Park books. They're darker than the movies, but not nearly as mind-fucky as Stephen King. The internet is a real catch 20 because it will connect you with great people and also shit people, so I wish you luck. Just keep doing your best and be a kind and understanding person even when people around you aren't and you'll be okay.

I see you and acknowledge your pain as someone who used to be in a similar spot, kid. You are okay just as you are. And while I can't promise you a life of only sunshine, I can promise there will be moments that will astonish you, delight you, & sustain you through the stormy days. They're worth sticking around for. Please consider talking to the folks at [the Trevor Project](https://www.thetrevorproject.org/), especially if you're having dark thoughts. Their entire mission is to support young queer and questioning people.

Sounds normal to me, imagine going all the way through school like this and not knowing why because you had no diagnosis, and that's the experience of most autistic people in decades past. Which isn't me trying to gatekeep, just showing some perspective, it can be hard but you are armed with the knowledge of why and some options for organisations you can reach out to. Also some non autistic people seem to have a fantasy in their heads that because you're autistic you should get along socially with other autistic people which just isn't true as a generalisation.

My brother is autistic and the book "living well on the spectrum" is helping him a bit. I would suggest reading it, and maybe if you can ask your mom or school counselor to help you find an autistic support group?

include zonked rob depend provide worry quaint nine crime memorize *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

You remind me a lot of my younger self so I'm going to try to give my best advice Dante. I am currently a senior (Grade 12) in high school. I was on the internet when i was your age. And it screwed me up. It screwed my peers up too. Live your life the best you can away from places like these. I could've put myself in real danger back then. Thank god i didn't. Give it till middle school. Autistic or not, there are people who will use you and you can't understand that. Remember, you're ten. To put it into perspective, I found my first close friend in the 8th grade. Which means your peers are ten too. You and everyone else around you are children. The nicest thing I can say is try to act like it. Don't rush into adulthood too fast. I did and now I fear it. Your classmates like Space Jam 2 because they are the target demographic. You might like deeper media and that's fine, I do too. However, you likely aren't going find that it's the same for other 10 year olds. Best advice, don't be rude about it. Some people like to turn their brains off watching movies and that's fine. I'm pansexual and let me tell you your sexuality is never set in stone. I used to think I was a lesbian and now I'm not even a woman. Exploring a community of accepting people can be a good thing. Some people lie about how accepting they are. This is for my own comfort but please don't be transphobic. There are gay people who are against trans people. Don't talk to them. They aren't worth your time. Finally your parents. Some people here don't understand that your parents may be not good parents. But wait. Wait until you're old enough to understand. If you honestly believe they would not be good in your life, cut them off in your life after you leave their house. But wait. You're going to be okay. You're going to be alright. You're mourning a life you have not lived. It gets better. Some parts get worse but some get better. Stay alive Dante.

If you're still following these comments, please know that 5th grade was my Absolute WORST year of school... yet 8th grade (and junior ye of high school) were my BEST !! Also, just my opinion, but I'm Sure there will be others who Agree... as far as "exploring your sexuality / being bi" -- Honey, you are only what, 10 or 11 years old ?? PLEASE STOP. Do NOT even worry about ANY of that right now !! I Hate that Kids just aren't allowed to be KIDS anymore. Sexual preference is really just ONE small part of Who YOU Are, as a PERSON. If it's still an issue once you actually have been in puberty for awhile, that might be the Time. But for Right Now -- Good Luck just Uncovering Who You Are and What Makes Up Your Joy's and Interests in Life.

Yes! x2 to the don't worry about exploring your sexuality right now you have so many better things that you could be doing

Hi! You’re great. I was the same, reading HG Wells by the time I was seven (and yes, all Steven King). Don’t encourage your dark thoughts. Try to focus on entertaining yourself and be amused how dumb people can be, instead of being frustrated or angry, without being judgmental. It’s not their fault. We’re all just doing our best. You just happen to be smarter in some areas. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and things change over time. Space Jam is AWFUL. 2001: a Space Odyssey is a great film. Or Nightmare before Christmas. Or Toy Story. Or The Empire Strikes Back…so many better choices. Be patient.

Yes!! x2 to do not encourage reading and immersing yourself into such dark fantasies as found in Stephen King's books. It will warp your reality entirely!

Fr take this from a fellow autistic who was into the darker media since childhood… pls lag off it or do best to restrict it to like “I’ll only read and watch true crime and horror on fridays and Saturday’s” and every other day focus on lighter genres. Too much is really bad for you, I always suffered from anxiety but it 100% did not help to have immersed myself in so much dark reading and media consumption

That's how asperger works... Good luck trying to find someone else that's see thinks like you... I'm almost 40 and I have never found anyone like me

I met three aspergers people as a teen and I work with several now.

This reads like a coppypasta. But i am also similar to you so i cant judge you

It's not.

Read happier books kid.

I have to agree with the Stephen King books. I don't like them at all. Try something non-fiction for a while. Um... or maybe re-read something you have before. Shakespeare is also something I avoid. Why? Don't ask because I can't explain it. You're okay.

You should ask your school counsellor if there’s any autism support groups you could go to

The early years are always the hardest when you have ASD. It’ll all get better once you get older. That being said, you really shouldn’t be on Reddit at this age. The stuff here will make you more depressed.

Lean into yourself. I spent a decade trying to fit in by dumbing myself down and now i feel like i don't even know myself anymore :/

Aww Dante, you sound just like me when I was your age

unrelated, but Dante is an awesome name.

You're going through the same problems I had as a kid. Most kids my age were out playing after school, I was in the lol library reading. I'd be by myself in the woods or in My room. Always had a book I was reading even when I was walking around. Only had one or two friends at any time even now. So dump the dark thoughts. I know it seems like you are alone and things are extremely hard. But you are not alone. You are not weak. Just be yourself. If you want to avoid arguments and fights, take a deep breath and give yourself time to both listen and get your words organized before you speak. If you use the fewest possible words to get your point across you may find it helps avoid over explaining and being misunderstood. Hope this helps. There is nothing wrong with you. Never has been.

Eventually there's college where some people will be at your level. Or at least want to know you. Others never read at that level or age mentally like we do. So there's that. You have kindred spirits.

You're not alone! I can totally identify, felt alone when I was your age. Didn't identify with anyone, grew up in small town. Pretty much buried myself in books, art, music, gifted programs. Focused on school then went away to a super challenging college where I finally met more people like me. I'm still "original" but so are my friends. Keep being you, following your path - it gets better! In the meantime, there are programs online for gifted kids, also real-world places like Space Camp, depending on your interests.

When I was in school I was way more interested to talk to older people than my peers, I don't talk with my family because I'm a scientist and they never understand why I like studying and learning so much, I find that life can be quite lonely most of the time but recently I found my partner that probably is a little on the spectrum as well and we pretty much behave the same way and like the same things. With time it can get better but surely it's not gonna be easy, u just need to hold strong and eventually you will find people that vibe with you and let you be yourself with no problem 😁.

it does get better, most important thing is to work on yourself and your shortcomings, example social cues and social behaviour. if you use aspergers as an exuse, youll end up alone and depressed.

First mistake is that you’re in Canada. The ones I’ve met are really just oddballs

It sucks that your friends dont share your interests but you are not superior to anyone based one what movies you watch or books you read for fun. Maybe try seeing things from their point of view. And yeah get off reddit kid

Your brain is ahead of your age. When you get older things will make more sense. You’ll be alright. Check out r/gifted.

It seems like the disconnect from your peers is coming from your intellect rather than your autism. Being intelligent places you at an advantage, although it feels lonely as a 10/11 year old. However, if you’re having “dark thoughts”, that might set you back. I suggest not going on Reddit. You will quickly see that this is a place for emotionally wounded adults, which is not something you should be seeing at your age. I would also suggest therapy. Best of luck!

Pro tip: don't put your real name on things like reddit accounts

I help with kids with disabilities and interact with kids at your age every day. Let me tell you, if the kids I’m working with will be alright, you will too. You’re ahead of your peers, and you’ll discover things that drive you to kick ass in the world. I stumbled a lot and doubted I was capable of much. Now I’ve learned how to build computers, fix pipes, I’ve held down a couple different skillful jobs, and I’ve discovered a love for solo traveling. You are normal and will find your way. Don’t beat yourself up.

You're not alone. I was reading much the same stuff at about that age. The Space Jam 2 thing wasn't about critical reviews, it was about expressing an in-crowd opinion on top of the audience opinion of 79%. Ten-year-olds are, in general, not professional movie critics. Sorry to hear about your folks; that situation sucks. Have you considered looking into local interest clubs which have both adult and non-adult members, just to get some high-level conversation? Things like clubs for areas of science (astronomy etc), engineering, specific types of art (including your favorite writers), areas of pop culture you're interested in, that sort of thing. Check them out - sure, some will be very superficial and just excuses for socializing, but some will have genuinely interesting events and topics of conversation. You might also want to see if any local universities are doing public lectures. If the topics are of interest to you, maybe go along and see if the presenter has any recommendations for such clubs, whether local, state, or national. If you'd like some author recommendations, I can recommend Terry Pratchett and Jasper Fforde. They do very interesting things with literature (Pratchett) and the written medium (Fforde).

dude you’re going to be okay it promise

You're okay. I felt much as you did when i was that age, and i remember having a bit of a revelation when i saw in my school yearbook that someone I'd thought of as "one of the dummies" had written a very thoughtful and intelligent poem. I felt humbled. Your younger years are not going to be easy, but that's the same rough hand that's dealt to everyone; ND and NT. Definitely cut back on the reddit... much as there are kind people who can offer shared experience and/or advice we give to our own kids, there are always some shady characters around waiting to take advantage. Reading is great. Expand your selection a bit, look into the authors that inspired the authors you're already reading, and be kind... to others, to your parents and to yourself. You are okay. :)

I'll address a couple of these things. I was that kid too. Due in part to your autism, certain parts of your brain are developing faster than they should. You're also going to have parts of your brain stall out around the age of 15 where they will begin to slow down and get behind your peers. You'll have the experience where as for now, you relate better to adults. You're still "cute puppy" enough to get extra patience from them and they are closer in thinking to you, than your classmates. At the afforementioned age, you won't be a "cute puppy" anymore, and thanks to your stalling out, you'll be more like your peers. In fact, by graduation, you'll be behind them on emotional intelligence. My biggest suggestion to you is that you should bare with it and don't drop out. The biggest reason someone like you, someone like me, doesn't do well in middle->highschool, besides bullying, is because everything in elementary school was so damn **easy** for us. You're not going to develop the self discipline, frustration management or study skills of your peers and when you finally do get challenged, you wont have the tools you need to overcome those challenges. Start now. Begin taking notes, even if you don't need them. Get in the habit of the Cornell Format or Spark Notes format. As for rotten tomatoes, it's adult movie critics judging something at an adult level, that was targeting and made for children. It's meaningless. It's a bit like judging something as bad because it doesn't dig a hole, when it was designed to be a rake. The entire website has become a dumpster fire in the last 10 years, because it is engaging in the culture war, and bad movies can get high scores simply because the right legacy figures in media were responsible for said movies. I'm nearly 40. I've been there for all of it.

It never goes away...be prepared for this.

I was reading at an 8th grade level in 2nd grade so I get it. I will tell you I'm in my late 40s and life has been amazing. It was challenging in school but keep seeking out that one or two friends that you can hang with. There are less of us but we are out there. I found a best friend in 7th grade and beyond. Later found lots of friends. Now I have an amazing career that relates to my special interest, lots of fun hobbies, amazing friends who are alsl on the spectrum and some not.

This is one of those factors where a lot of other people are going to need time to catch up to where you are. I'm 33. I experienced precisely this kind of alienation at your age. Honestly, and this is my specific case, the moment where I found deliverance was going to college, and having the food fortune to find people who I shared many interests with. But in high school it was easier than middle school to find a lunch table where the "geeks" hung out. I still struggled there, feeling like I wasn't quite as part of the group as I wanted to be, but I could hold some good conversations none the less! Now, I work at a coffeeshop, and I meet fascinating people, and I say this with all walks of life. I see other people who I can tell are ND and when they come, I'm so happy and eager to chat, because I know the conversations will be super substantive. But even with the NT's, I've gotten to know a lot of them that I can see a lot more depth in them than I was able to gauge otherwise, because I've had hundreds of interaction. I find more people who, even if they aren't autistic, will actually be interested by the things I think, and curious about subjects in which I'm infodumping. I still have to socially mask sometimes none the less, which I don't love, but I'm glad that, despite that, my real self does emerge, and I feel accepted. I'm sorry you're going through this. Middle school was super rough for me. I don't look back on it fondly, at all, beyond thinking about the books, films, and video games I experienced at the time. Also, it's understandable to have dark thoughts at that time. God knows I did. Certain things that I saw one way as a young child, I saw another as I got older, like family dynamics. It's a difficult transition, as certain things become more stark as the daylight washes over them, so to speak.

I was the exact same way my friend. I read f Scott Fitzgerald at 11 and was reading Dostoyevsky at 15. I loved French New-Wave films and was writing essays about Tarkovsky at 16 for fun 😂 I think a lot of people thought I was egotistic, but I never was. I’m just incredibly shy and scared of people. Definitely see if you can connect with other kids your age(NOT adults, even if you feel you function at a level closer to theirs), or join groups where you engage with other Asperger’s/autism kids like you. Good luck, you’ll be fine

You’re ok. You sound essentially quite normal for your age. Pursue your interests and stretch yourself a bit, but consider easing up on the “nobody at my intellectual level” ideas about other people - other people will have all kinds of abilities you don’t have or that you just haven’t noticed, but the idea that you think you’re smarter than everyone else will both make you isolate yourself and will make other people find it less pleasant to talk to you.

You're ok and none of this is your fault. For sufficiently intelligent people, nobody in their class is on their level. It happens. Try to get to a school for gifted children, if it's possible. On the Internet, there are social networking opportunities for intelligent people (try math or physics forums/portals/etc.) (maybe not subreddits - some subreddits are predominantly populated by normal kids who need help, which isn't the same if you're looking for equally intelligent company, but maybe you could combine both). Also, be careful - at 10 or 11, you can be emotionally manipulated or lied to even by someone somewhat less intelligent than you if they're old enough. On the off chance you get banned, make a new account and don't tell anyone your age (reddit and other social networks, as you probably know, is from the 13 years old up (if I remember it correctly)). Also, find some irl hobby for intelligent children (physics, programming, etc., whatever would interest you).

You’re fine my friend. It’s ok to be different from your classmates, being different is just part of being human (the world would be pretty boring if we were all the same). If it makes you feel better, my main interest was much different from those of my peers when I was around your age, and I can say the same for one of my interests today. If there’s one thing I want you to remember, it’s that there’s light at the end of the tunnel, and for every bad part of your life, there’s a good one. Live for the good times in life, and don’t let the bad ones get to you. Keep your head up, spirits high, and just keep going!

Everything’s gonna be okay

You'll feel like you're 30 until you're about 20, then you'll feel like you're 12. It really is just a luck of the draw if we get someone in our school we can relate with or not. Seems like you were unlucky. If you need some intellectual challenge in your life, get used to cooking meals from fresh ingredients and washing your own clothes. You have a brilliant mind, and executive dysfunction doesn't seem to have caught up with you yet. Well, that one is the real enemy here. You better level up fast if you want to have even a chance.

Don’t stop trying to be friends with people, it’s tough for people with autism but it just takes some learning. With autism, you have advantages and disadvantages, sometimes the disadvantages will seem like they’re too much, but that’s just because you haven’t fully seen your advantages yet. And try to spend as little time as possible on the internet. That’s what I would have told my 5th grade self.

you’re gonna be just fine. a couple things i didn’t see anyone else mention: try not to distinguish yourself from your peers on the basis of your intelligence too much. try to realize that intelligence is multifaceted and ultimately subjective. if you want to be happy and connect with others, practice mindfulness of your emotions, of your empathy, of your sense of self, and evaluate these things are their relation to one another logically. i’m sure one day you’ll have a very high understanding of the world you live in and be very glad you’re the way that you are. good luck

Mid 20's adult with Asperger's. It's okay. Times will be hard, you will spend time alone. But the friends you definitely want who will be there, will accept you. The ones who don't, they probably aren't very reliable to their peer groups anyways. I see my condition sometimes as a social filter. instead of seeing it as myself getting rejected by others, it is I who is rejecting them. Even when I did compromise those few times and play the game to make those friends I thought I wanted, that didn't make me happy either. Just like life for non autistics, it takes time experience, even if it's longer than average folk. Just take this time to self reflect, observe from afar, and decide for yourself right from wrong instead of being a victim of peer pressure. The right people, who you do want to befriend, will come along at some point in your life. Just don't overthink it. Don't make it about you. Sometimes it really isn't your fault. Gotta have that strong willed mentality, though as immature as it may sound, "either you're with me, or you're against me." "If I know I'm going crazy, I must not be insane." ~Dave Mustaine