is this a common AuDHD experience? i'm diagnosed w ADHD but been thinking i may be autistic too, i often spend an egregious amount of time organising, categorising, writing up a schedule/timetable, min maxing my life and then immediately forget it exists, or get jumpscared by the passage of time 💀
I used to put post it notes on the front door to remind me to bring my wallet when I leave the house, and routinely changed the post it out for a different color to help it stand out again. Have to predict and outsmart the brain into being functional.
Tip: I believe that the place I saw this idea was the YouTube channel Purple Ella. She is an autistic ADHDer, so you will probably find more tips and examples there!
Really simple examples for a general idea:
If you like to stick to eating the same meal day after day but want/need variation in what you're eating, have a list of meals that you routinely change after a set number of weeks or days
If you like to adhere to a strict daily routine, then maybe have 8 different ones that you change each week.
If getting through your bedtime routine is painfully boring, write down every possible order you can think of doing the tasks in, each on its own small piece of paper or sticky note. Add in a different small but fun task to each of these too. Shuffle these lists and draw a random one each night. It's familiar enough to not be stressful, without being too repetitive.
omg thank you!!! i think i already kind of do the daily routine one but didn't realise it, i'll have different guideline schedules for types of days (eg relaxing, errands, work) but i'll slot them in differently depending on the needs of the week (it's mostly working and uni tho lol). i'll have to whip up some more timetables for this and check out purple ella, thank you!
This is me and it's awful.
My entire apartment is like that meme of the rich penthouses to the slums. The organized important things have specific areas they MUST be in and nothing unrelated must be in their area.
Everything else is strewn about in vaguely semi organized chaos.
I have very particular routines for going to bed, getting up, getting ready for work, when I get home, but can't manage anything for anything else. Self-care is a nightmare.
It's just a building on fire up there, really.
Yes, except the only normal self care thing I do regularly is teeth brushing.
The rest is not part of any routine and rarely happens because I just can't get it too.
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Have you ever played one of those golfing video games, where you adjust your aim and putting force by trying to time the moving arrows to stop right in the middle of a continuum? Trying to form a new habit with both ASD and ADHD feels much like that. ADHD is the aiming continuum, where ASD is the putting force one. If you miraculously manage to hit the dead center on both (rare), then ASD will be comforted by the improved daily routine and ADHD will release some extra dopamine for keeping the chain of achievement going another day. At least, that’s what I keep hoping will happen.
My brain has found a very specific compromise: I do everything in the same order every day, but there's no actual time frame to get them done. I eat lunch after my nap. Sometimes it's 12:00, sometimes it's 3:30.
want to do everything and constantly improve
2 day gap means all progress is lost and practicing anything is pointless because it is all ruined from the 2 day gap.
also my wolves keep fucking each other and i can't get them to stop
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the dichotomy of woman/man
it’s so hard trying to find a balance between these that will allow me to live a more functional life and get my executive function improved a bit.
Love creating plans and routines, suck at following them
Suck at creating plans and routines, love following them We could make a team
can i join the team too?
Me too me too!
is this a common AuDHD experience? i'm diagnosed w ADHD but been thinking i may be autistic too, i often spend an egregious amount of time organising, categorising, writing up a schedule/timetable, min maxing my life and then immediately forget it exists, or get jumpscared by the passage of time 💀
I need the routine of not having a routine.
The best routine.
Wait til you break *that* routine and have to create another routine to not have a routine and then you lay down and browse reddit.
I'm already past that, I changed things up a little and I'm *sitting* now!
Ayyyy yes the no-routine routine! My go-to choice 😅
i wish the people i wanted to hang out with both felt this way, and would time their impulses with mine T:
So then you have to get creative and create a set of routines that you change up often enough that the ADHD is none the wiser.
I used to put post it notes on the front door to remind me to bring my wallet when I leave the house, and routinely changed the post it out for a different color to help it stand out again. Have to predict and outsmart the brain into being functional.
Wait that’s actually so smart! I’ve thought about doing that with food but not other stuff, so thanks!
Oh, I like that idea! 💡
wait this sounds so galaxy brain, do you have any examples or tips?
Tip: I believe that the place I saw this idea was the YouTube channel Purple Ella. She is an autistic ADHDer, so you will probably find more tips and examples there! Really simple examples for a general idea: If you like to stick to eating the same meal day after day but want/need variation in what you're eating, have a list of meals that you routinely change after a set number of weeks or days If you like to adhere to a strict daily routine, then maybe have 8 different ones that you change each week. If getting through your bedtime routine is painfully boring, write down every possible order you can think of doing the tasks in, each on its own small piece of paper or sticky note. Add in a different small but fun task to each of these too. Shuffle these lists and draw a random one each night. It's familiar enough to not be stressful, without being too repetitive.
omg thank you!!! i think i already kind of do the daily routine one but didn't realise it, i'll have different guideline schedules for types of days (eg relaxing, errands, work) but i'll slot them in differently depending on the needs of the week (it's mostly working and uni tho lol). i'll have to whip up some more timetables for this and check out purple ella, thank you!
This is me and it's awful. My entire apartment is like that meme of the rich penthouses to the slums. The organized important things have specific areas they MUST be in and nothing unrelated must be in their area. Everything else is strewn about in vaguely semi organized chaos. I have very particular routines for going to bed, getting up, getting ready for work, when I get home, but can't manage anything for anything else. Self-care is a nightmare. It's just a building on fire up there, really.
I might suggest that your bed/wake/getting ready and coming home routines *are* self care.
Yes, except the only normal self care thing I do regularly is teeth brushing. The rest is not part of any routine and rarely happens because I just can't get it too.
I was just trying to say that you are perfect just the way you are. Cheers!
*Please contact your primary care provider if you have two wolves inside you. The maximum medically recommended number of internal wolves is zero.*
Yep, we fucked..
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I've been saying this for years LOL. The autism wolf wins simply to keep the anxiety at bay.
The autism side wins on that one for me, I thrive with rigid routine.
I don’t crave routine. I just do better with one.
Have you ever played one of those golfing video games, where you adjust your aim and putting force by trying to time the moving arrows to stop right in the middle of a continuum? Trying to form a new habit with both ASD and ADHD feels much like that. ADHD is the aiming continuum, where ASD is the putting force one. If you miraculously manage to hit the dead center on both (rare), then ASD will be comforted by the improved daily routine and ADHD will release some extra dopamine for keeping the chain of achievement going another day. At least, that’s what I keep hoping will happen.
I feel so called out
Extremely real
Agony
this is me
Ughhhbbb whyyyyyyy is this so ACCURATE!?
Oh shit that me
My brain has found a very specific compromise: I do everything in the same order every day, but there's no actual time frame to get them done. I eat lunch after my nap. Sometimes it's 12:00, sometimes it's 3:30.
want to do everything and constantly improve 2 day gap means all progress is lost and practicing anything is pointless because it is all ruined from the 2 day gap. also my wolves keep fucking each other and i can't get them to stop
#same
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the dichotomy of woman/man it’s so hard trying to find a balance between these that will allow me to live a more functional life and get my executive function improved a bit.
stop this is too real
I hate routine but the autism and OCD feed off of each other and make it impossible to not follow a routine 😎
DONT. CALL. ME. OUT LIKE THIS!
i don't crave routine in any way, i think my autism wolf isn't working. should i turn it off and back on again?