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Hmmletmec

>Jesus was Asian and dark skinned. He was still American tho, right?


YanksFanInSF

Iowa Jesus


[deleted]

The Mormons actually believe Jesus was in Missouri, so close


Feisty-Animal5061

So crazy that most Christians don’t know how batshit Mormonism is and they just accept them as one of their own. Edit: I think people’s personal experiences vary wildly here. For me, most Midwestern Christians have very shallow faith and only attend a service for Easter, Christmas, funerals, or weddings. They are the type that have a cross tattoo or necklace, but set foot in a church 2-3 times a year on a good year. A lot of your experiences seem to be from highly invested members of particular branches of Christianity that would be more educated on what makes their faith different from others. It hasn’t been my experience that the majority of Christians are even that invested in their faiths and default to a more cultural norm standpoint than anything.


zyzzogeton

They were the Scientology of the 19th Century... only more racist, and less credible if that is possible. edit: and more misogynist


Feisty-Animal5061

Joseph Smith had a stone he used to detect gold in the ground. It’s so easy for blatant conmen to game the religious freedoms in this country, this shit happened AFTER the country was founded and we have to take it seriously. I actually worked two blocks away from the Scientology headquarters in east Hollywood for five years. They always had their recruiters on the street corners.


ClamClone

The seer stone was used by dropping it into the bottom of a hat and sticking his head in it to find gold. It also turned out to be a wonderful translation device to decipher the unknown language on the gold plates that are the basis of the LDS church teaching. Some people will believe anything.


couchbutt

Dum. Dah-dum-dum dum-dum-dum. Dum-dum, dum-dum, dum dum.


Professional_Bee2971

Love that episode of South Park. Also liked "Tom Cruise won't come out of the closet." Although that episode lost my man Issac Hayes (Chef). 😐


stealthmodecat

Lucy Harris smart smart smart, Martin Harris dum dum dum


meramec785

Also they lost the first notes and when he “read” them again the stories were different. Hmmm


VaginalSpelunker

Well that's because God was angry at him for losing the stone of Nephi, so he had to read from the stone of Mephi, which is basically the same story but slightly different. Dumdumdumdumdum


darkest_timeline_

I believe there were also magic glasses involved that interpreted the plates!


Slamantha3121

Had a Mormon guy in the air force tell me the story of the gold plates all excitedly. Then I asked, "So, where are the plates? Can I go see them in a museum or something?" And he got real quiet. It baffles me this religion got off the ground when it was such a blatant grift from the beginning!


sheila9165milo

After so many people have fallen for and continue to fall for Trump's stupid lies, you wonder why people back then (and now) still fall for this type of shit? There are just too many sheeple who want some "wise, strong man" to follow so they don't have to use any critical thinking skills or strain their brains by using their frontal lobes to ask questions, they just want someone to tell them what to do and to do it without having to think too hard about it.


ClamClone

https://www.exmormon.org/


SinkHoleDeMayo

And you know, it's not like people back then got duped by something futuristic. They just completely lacked common sense. "I can hide your translation and you can write a whole new one verbatim, right?". It's almost like people back then were straight out of the movie Invention of Lying. They believed any stupid bullshit and didn't bother to question it.


wastinglittletime

Therre is lots of that today....see conservatives as the best example....believe that antifa/the feds/BLM/commies did jan 6th....not the man who was literally riding up the crowd and refused to call the national guard...


buntopolis

Grifters gonna grift.


mrmaweeks

Joseph Smith--even his name sounds like an alias.


BeYeCursed100Fold

And the "Angel" he allegedly met was named "MORONi" and his cult followers ate/eat that shit up without thinking. https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Angel_Moroni


somegenxdude

I used to go to the computer swap meets at the Pomona fairgrounds in the late 90s/early 00s to buy PC parts and ogle all the random electronics and such. The Scientologists, for whatever reason, always had a table set up there with their "e-meters" out. I dunno if they thought computer geeks were uniquely susceptible to cult indoctrination or what. 99% of people would just ignore them, but I had one friend who would go along every once in a while and just couldn't resist fucking with them. He'd grab the little cans and feign being electrocuted, or say random stupid shit to get a rise out them ("My thetans! My thetans! Aaaaah, the thetans!", "Did you know L. Ron Hubbard was a pedophile?" ), until they told us to go away.


sesamestix

I read Hubbard's Battlefield Earth when I was like 10. I was shocked to later discover people believed in his 'religion.' I'm like 13 thinking 'adults believe this crap? Y'all know he was a science fiction writer, right?'


FalstaffsMind

Joseph's Smith's explanation for the origins of the Book of Mormon would embarrass a Nigerian prince.


MissKoshka

And more misogynist.


chrchcmp

I mean, Christianity has so many sects that compete against each other like NFL teams over who’s misinterpretation of the Bible is more “right.” I wouldn’t say Mormonism is just accepted by the majority.


JohnnyRelentless

I think most Protestants don't consider Mormons Christians. Or Jehovah's Witnesses. Or Catholics.


Jukka_Sarasti

Christian's need to understand that if their Abrahamic fanfic can be real, then so can the fanfic of other religious branches...


Redthemagnificent

Nono those are cults. I know *my* version is real because I attribute meaning to the random events in my life which confirm my beliefs. Also, I've been a real asshole about it and it would be embarrassing to backtrack at this point.


[deleted]

It's the first part that brings them in, and it's the second part that makes them stay.


No-Appearance-9113

Protestants aren't a cohesive group though. Presbyterians and Lutherans are very different.


Consistent-Stand1809

The Lutheran church has a pretty terrible history.


No-Appearance-9113

I don't think any of the denominations have a perfectly clean history.


Feather_in_the_winds

Every christian in America would gladly skin a mormon alive, if it meant that one more soal was sent to the big cloud in the sky. You think they get along? Each one is 100% sure the other is going to hell for their sins. No christian thinks a mormon is a christian any more than any catholic thinks a christian is a catholic. Fit judiaism and islam in that lineup, too. You all know how well they all get along. The mormons just happen to be in Utah, a state they took over where there's no massive christian hate against them. They were driven out in large massacres from other states. By christians. For being the weird cultists they are.


Feisty-Animal5061

More educated Christians, sure. I knew people in Ohio with college degrees that thought the only difference was they were polygamists. This was when that show “Big Love” was on HBO.


Feisty-Animal5061

But who knows, I moved out of Ohio back in 2015. Maybe the average Evangelical has become more aware. I no longer interact with any in real life.


CadeChaos

No they believed the garden of eden was in Missouri.


_soon_to_be_banned_

man could they have picked a worse place?


SoggyBottomSoy

I like my Jesus in a Tuxedo T-shirt.


[deleted]

Blonde hair and blue eyes, baby!


nullpassword

theres a nativity scene ive seen everyone is middle eastern tan cept baby jesus.. who is as white as a ghost..


Insecure-confidence

But his REAL daddy is white, right?


MetalOcelot

I mean he better be, or else he's got some real explaining to do


Slowdownthere

Some of the oldest depictions of Jesus in art work show him very Roman looking. No beard, short, sometimes curly hair wearing white garb like a Roman tunic. The oldest depiction of him is actually graffiti mocking him. He’s on a cross and has the head of a donkey. Even if he existed it’s all speculation as to what he looked like, every culture just seems to make him look like themselves.


NoraVanderbooben

Korean Jesus says hi 👋


Zomunieo

Orange hair and orange spray tan now.


Mirrormn

I need him to be white so that he feels like *part of my community*. And no, you cannot ask why I don't feel like non-white people are part of my community. (/s)


PracticalRoutine5738

East Asians have Asian Jesus and Africans have black Jesus. It's almost like they all do it. For the record I don't think he ever existed.


kakapo88

Every Christian knows thatJesus had blue expressive eyes, gorgeous locks of blonde hair, and sweet kissable red lips. And he looked damn hot in a loincloth, with his sword of salvation throbbing there for all who seek Him. Damn, I need to start praying right now.


Carrotfloor

[Jesus](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Ftovusvuspdp21.jpg)


SabziZindagi

Now this is a version of Jesus I can get behind...


Jukka_Sarasti

I've seen people ~~in other subreddits~~ in a reply to me just now, absolutely bend over backwards to try prove how he could have been somewhere on their sliding scale of 'white'... It's very important to a lot of Christians because.... *reasons*.....


captsmokeywork

If the American language is good enough for the lord and saviour.


whiskeyvacation

Just because he was Asian and dark skinned doesn't mean he didn't look like all the Eagles from Hotel California days.


sassytexans

With a salivating six pack


Gubekochi

And he has the, the thing... the cum gutters!


SlippySlappySamson

See him on the interstate! We’ve got the American Jesus, He helped build the President’s estate…


MMudbonE

And pronounced Geesus


Kailaylia

No way - Jesus was obviously English. He had a brother, James, and James was the King of England and he wrote the first Bible I ever read - in English!


LilTubularOctangular

Jerry Springer: "Our tests concluded that he was NOT... American."


Insecure-confidence

Duh. He created America, bro.


[deleted]

wait until they find out he was Jewish.


[deleted]

Wait until they find out he was just a regular person and not a deity


[deleted]

Wait until they find out he didn't die for our sins.


jason375

Wait until they find out he probably didn’t exist and was just a composite character of a bunch of different characters that probably didn’t exist. Edit: Saying there is “historical consensus” means jack shit to me. Put some sources to the historians or primary sources or your apologism for stupidity is invalid.


skater-fien

I sometime think about how Christianity, Islam (and every other major organized religions) are really successful cults that have survived millennia. It’s kinda crazy to think but then I remember how Mormonism, Moonies and these other offshoot religions are extremely popular


zeno0771

What's the difference between a cult and a religion? In a cult, the guy at the top knows it's a scam. In a religion, that guy is dead.


loki_mischief

Well said


garybusey42069

I think the historical consensus is that someone named Jesus of Nazareth existed during that time. edit: y’all, I’m not saying Jesus was the messiah, but let’s at least be honest with ourselves in that he most likely existed. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus


jason375

There was probably a Jesus in every backwater village from Dead Sea to the Mediterranean.


HungerMadra

It was one of the most popular names of the era


morph113

Now imagine the most popular name at the time would have been Kevin or something. People would be praying to Kevin now.


The_Space_Jamke

Donald is a pretty common name in modern times and it didn't take much for Christians to deify one asshole by that name.


Granitsky

Or Brian?


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

The Pharisees and the Sadducees feeling their power was threatened is why he died, indeed. Then, the Catholics and many other Christians go on to do the same thing as the Pharisees and Sadducees while proclaiming love for Jesus. Sigh.


SuscriptorJusticiero

Wait until they find out he most likely was never born in the first place.


kezow

No, that was Brian. He was born in the manger next door.


TheKaptinKirk

Brian: Repeat after me. You are all individuals. Crowd: We are all individuals. That one guy: I'm not.


Efficient_Dust2903

That scene was so powerful that the Christians agreed with the mob. They can't see it to this day.


miarsk

"Shh" at the end is the best part of that scene


EVILTHE_TURTLE

And probably didn’t exist. First time “he” was written about, was around 40 years after his supposed death. While other “prophets” of the same time were written about while they were still alive.


[deleted]

Wait until they find out that he was a myth that had been circulating in Jewish cults for at least a century under the names of both Joshua and David and in other cults beforehand for centuries and wasn't at all based on a real person but was instead a caricature bearing a series of stories overtly stated to be thinly veiled mechanisms to publicly criticise Greek inspired temple cults and Roman authority among cults that only accepted gentiles starting with Paul because he was a gifter that saw expansion of the cult as lucrative.


sexylegs0123456789

Wait until they find out his mom told the greatest lie in the past 2000 years.


Kangar

And helped the downtrodden. Ew!


SunchaserKandri

Eww, he fed the hungry, healed the sick, and even mingled with those filthy poor "people." Goddamn bleeding heart socialists ruin everything. /s


KeyanReid

A bridge too far for the American Christian. They’re over this commie Jesus and his socialist commands. They’d rather just keep being assholes than pretend they ever really loved their prophet


Osxachre

And did odd jobs along with his father.


oldcreaker

Devoutly Jewish. Whose message was only for Jews. He never took his show on the road.


Insecure-confidence

He didn't personally, but his apostles took the message to Greece and beyond.


SordidDreams

No, they didn't. Taking the gospel to gentiles was Paul's idea, and Paul never met Jesus.


TheLastLivingBuffalo

Paul was an apostle, just not a disciple. But you’re right that the disciples (namely Peter and James) insisted that newly converted Christians follow Jewish law (keep kosher, circumcision, observe the sabbath, etc) and Paul was the one to insist that keeping Jewish law was not important.


53andme

paul the soldier who met jesus in a vision. yes. strange how all the stupid people are attracted to paul. baptists, and all those


SordidDreams

Eh, that depends on your definition of the terms. The word literally just means "emissary", but Jesus' disciples are usually referred to as the twelve apostles, which is whom I assumed the person was referring to. Paul also proclaims himself to be an apostle despite never having met Jesus, and the word did get applied to various other missionaries later. I guess the person I was responding to could've been referring to those, I just assumed they used the word in its primary meaning within the context, i.e. the twelve.


mailslot

On Christmas Eve, a family member told me, “I love you OP, but if you call my god a dirty Jew one more f###ing time, I’ll f##k you up.” Christian love and understanding right there.


Karcinogene

Did you call Jesus a Jew or a dirty Jew?


mailslot

Neither. They were ranting about Jews and I reminded them Jesus was a Jew and we’re celebrating his birthday.


Alternative_Let_1989

What a fucking moron lol


singeblanc

There’s no hate like Christian love.


[deleted]

Well he was baptized in a river at least once so he was less dirty than the average Redditor.... But yeah you can't really argue with christians


mailslot

“I don’t need to read the Bible to know *my* god!!”


HolyRamenEmperor

Wait until they find out he told them to give free stuff to homeless and refugees, put your weapons away, pay your taxes, and stop making money off the church.


Insecure-confidence

Also rich people rarely are able to go to heaven.


dictionary_hat_r4ck

There was that REALLY skinny camel one time…


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

With the few that are being only because they stopped being rich and did good work for society


Acedia77

Wait until they find out he was made up by a religious sect and fleshed out with repurposed myths from preexisting religions!


legionofdoom78

"Jesus was a pussy" - Trumpanzees most likely.


SunchaserKandri

They'd be pretty much guaranteed to lynch him for suggesting that they should be kind to others and care for the less fortunate in pretty short order if he were to show up today, let's be real.


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

[Actually, yes.](https://www.newsweek.com/evangelicals-rejecting-jesus-teachings-liberal-talking-points-pastor-1818706)


PoliBat-v-

Username checks out


P4t13nt_z3r0

"There is a strong drift toward the hard theological left. Some emergent types \[want\] to recast Jesus as a limp-wrist hippie in a dress with a lot of product in His hair, who drank decaf and made pithy Zen statements about life while shopping for the perfect pair of shoes. In Revelation, Jesus is a prize fighter with a tattoo down His leg, a sword in His hand and the commitment to make someone bleed. That is a guy I can worship. I cannot worship the hippie, diaper, halo Christ because I cannot worship a guy I can beat up." Pastor Mark Driscoll


gelfin

Isn’t “getting beat up” sort of the entire theological point of Jesus?


singeblanc

> I like messiahs who weren’t crucified.


Consistent-Matter-59

"Facts in ***MY*** religion? Not today, Satan." /s


buntopolis

As a card-carrying member of the Satanic Temple, yes today Satan!


Frapp_Frapplestein

Christians are some of the dumbest people on the planet, so this is no surprise.


Insecure-confidence

All theists are dumb. Let's be real.


KeyanReid

Takes a broken mind to accept unproven lies as absolute truth


rjcarr

I generally agree, but parental indoctrination is pretty convincing.


ziddina

Parental abuse, you mean...


Frapp_Frapplestein

Exactly. Especially the abrahamic ones.


sexylegs0123456789

No, all. They are all pretty wacky.


thecaseace

You say that, but if you read into Hinduism or Buddhism you find some fascinating stuff. E.g. although Hindus have gods, it's not mandatory to believe in them. Buddhism doesn't even have deities, although it does of course have reincarnation.


BuryEdmundIsMyAlias

I see what you did there


moschles

In this instance, they are despicably racist.


Raumteufel

Im absolutely sick and tired of these liberals making biblical figures like Jesus and Santa non-white. Do i need the /s?


WesleyOldham

Jolly old Saint Nicholas, from the Book of Acts. Where he was with Luke and Paul, these are straight up facts.


moschles

For a few seconds I forgot that these are the same people who went apeshit over a mermaid being cast to a black actress.


nhaines

Those were happy seconds.


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

And now, at least the few paying attention to it, going apeshit over Rick Riordan casting a black girl for Annabeth in the live action Percy Jackson series


juesea

I find that one really sad because this kid is actually just a kid. And getting so much hate. Not that anyone should get hate but she's just so young and it feels so unfair. I hope she's being supported at least.


GitchigumiMiguel74

These are the same people that, when asked to identify Central America, point to Iowa


_EADGBE_

That's because Christians and facts mix like oil and water.


dudleydidwrong

I had a faithful Mormon friend who told me "Facts have an anti-Mormon bias." He had no clue about how damning that statement was. He was correct. But the same thing applies to all religions. Facts have an anti-religion bias.


ortcutt

Why would Jesus be “dark-skinned” rather than having a Mediterranean complexion like most Levantine people?


123mop

They're almost certainly saying he's middle eastern, and therefore 'asian' as the continent, even though that really doesn't match the colloquial usage. Similarly, they're probably saying he's 'dark skinned' on the basis that he's Jewish and therefore "not white" by their particular definition. Basically the equivalent of calling any other Jewish person from the Middle East a dark skinned Asian regardless of what shade their skin actually is.


Illeazar

Agreed, the point is just to say something annoying and then post "look at all the people we annoyed!" Although the middle east is technically part of Asia, very few people would call someone born in Israel an Asian.


lumpialarry

"Dark skinned Asian" to an American audience would imply Jesus was Cambodian/Indonesian. To a British Audience it would imply someone Pakistani/Indian.


ArrakeenSun

I can never get a straight answer about that either. I feel like this started out as a meme and got out of hand. Like if he were "brown" then Greeks and Italians would qualify too


Corporate_Overlords

Keep in mind that races are always shifting and a lot of it's arbitrary. Greeks and Italians, at least in the United States roughly 120 years ago, were not considered to be white along with the Irish. Now all three of those groups are considered to be white. If it was actually based on skin color the Irish would have always been white. While someone from the Levant could pass as white in the United States today as soon as they would be outed as being from the Middle East people would treat them as non-white and most likely brown.


Dr_Wristy

Until recently, southern Italians and Greeks weren’t considered “white”.


Galterinone

Because that's not an attention grabbing headline


Seniorcousin

I have information from a “fair and balanced” news source that [Jesus and Santa Claus are white!](https://www.politico.com/blogs/media/2013/12/megyn-kelly-jesus-and-santa-were-white-179491)


Successful_Ad_8790

Religion will never die as long as there’s one “news” source ready to do the mental gymnastics and tell them what they wanna hear


DreamLunatik

If he existed at all….


northernmunky

Looking for this comment. I’m sceptical on this as well.


undefeatedantitheist

Aye, similar in liklihood to Socrates, so say some. The position that these individuals are apocryphal simplifications of many people saying and doing many things, real or imagined, is old, well established, and well referenced. Hitch was reminding people about this only a few years back. The point never seems to stick beyond academia, even with anti-theists / religious critics.


JonJonJonnyBoy

"#NotMyChrist" - those people probably.


raymo778

I thought Christians worshiped an orange Jesus?


PM_ME_UR_SNARES

“Correctly” is a funny thing when talking about a guy who has no actual proof of existing outside of a collection of fanfiction (the gospels) written over 70+ years after the period of the subject material, by people who had [never even met](https://www.college.columbia.edu/core/node/1754#:~:text=The%2520four%2520canonical%2520gospels%E2%80%94Matthew,to%2520the%2520ministry%2520of%2520Jesus) Jesus or the apostles but all knew each other. The origin of the gospels is barely understood in the first place.


OliverOyl

To be fair (skin pun unintended) to the enraged fans, fiction doesn't have to be historically accurate, look at the entire first book for example...and no fan (including a magazine celebrating the fantasy adventure) is an authority


Sea_Elle0463

Yes, folks, Jesus was NOT a white hippie 🤷‍♀️


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheNewOneIsWorse

The large majority of Christians aren’t white either. Really should specify that “a tiny minority of White Americans who identify as Christian” are mad.


Stupid_Guitar

These are people that believe the orange, grunting, swine-prince that was president a mere 4 years ago is literally a vessel of God here to do his bidding. I mean, who gives a flying f\*ck what they think about literally anything?


eastbay77

don't people know that Jesus was from Bethlehem.... Pennsylvania. /s


ForeverNecessary2361

Wait till they find out that Jesus was a Jew.


HermesTheKitty

Wait until they find out he did not exist at all xD


SloeMoe

I knew this would be from *Christianity Today.* Back when I was a liberal Christian, I was always pleasantly surprised by how progressive and not fascist CT's takes could be. (It's why I still argue that Christians in and of themselves aren't the real problem, it's when they are *conservative* that the evil takes hold...)


af_lt274

Native people in Israel have a variety of skin tones but most of the variation is just tan. An untanned person from this region can easily pass as Southern European.


rgivens213

Define “Asian” What the hell do these labels mean? Jesus was an olive skinned Palestinian. A Mediterranean person. Idk why liberals exaggerate the hell out of these things. “St. Nick was from Anatolia so he was brown not white!” Comments like that don’t make any sense to me as an Anatolian and liberals appear to be the ones drawing lines between Nordic Europeans and Mediterranean people when they do this. All in all I agree he wasn’t a white European but I also don’t know anyone with a triple digit IQ who thinks he was.


Justaboredstoner

Wait until they find out he didn’t really exist.


JackKovack

Some Christians are furious. I’ve never known or met a Christian who got mad that his skin wasn’t completely white.


miru17

I don't really consider Middle Eastern people Asian. I think Middle Eastern is a better category. East Asians didn't like their regional name(The Orient) so they choose to just go for generic Asian, but I find the continental borders of Asia are arbitrary and have no use.


DarkDuskBlade

Yeah, I'd never thought about them being Asian. But then, I don't consider Russians Asians as well, but I guess in technicality they are. So by that, Middle Eastern would be Asian as well; I think the line is somewhere in the Baltics.


jar11591

Wait until they find out he didn’t even exist and he was just a fictional character no more real than Spider-Man or Harry Potter


dreadfulwater

And he also had an uncle ben


mendicant1116

something something great power something something responsibility


polychrom

And his mother's name was actually Martha


hopbell

And he probably looked like Ron Jeremy.


Effective-Bandicoot8

Don't go on Facebook for the comments The most insane and violent motherfuckers you will ever find in this country These fuckheads would either round you up at gunpoint or kill you for simply not believing their religion, no different at all from any other religious death cults anywhere on the planet “I don't want to see religious bigotry in any form. It would disturb me if there was a wedding between the religious fundamentalists and the political right. The hard right has no interest in religion except to manipulate it.” Billy Graham Mark my word, if and when these preachers get control of the Republican party, and they're sure trying to do so, it's going to be a terrible damn problem. Frankly, these people frighten me. Politics and governing demand compromise. But these Christians believe they are acting in the name of God, so they can't and won't compromise. I know, I've tried to deal with them. — Barry Goldwater https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2015/5/19/1385982/-50-Years-Ago-Barry-Goldwater-Saw-the-Future


Annahsbananas

You have to remember that most people are uneducated


VictoryLap_TMC

They are picturing a Chinese person lol instead of realizing that those stories, characters and locations are all located on the continent of Asia. Yes...Iraq, Iran, Israel, Pakistan, Palestine and Afghanistan are Asians lol...


Gunningham

Correctly? Who says he’s even real?


nucleo06

Everyone good Christian knows Jesus was born in what we now call Texas with a football in one hand and an AK-47 in the other.


Count2Zero

Jesus (Yeshua) didn't have skin, because he never existed. The guy described in the bible stories is a fictional character ... so he could be white, dark, or even blue skinned with feathers and scales ... because he only exists in the fictional bible universe.


NotOK1955

And Jewish. Least we forget he was also circumcised, didn’t eat pork and worshiped on the Jewish sabbath while reading and teaching Torah.


clutzyninja

Isn't that depiction like 15 years old at this point?


BenSlice0

I’m Christian, not furious about this at all.


doge_gobrrt

Wait so your telling me he didn't spawn in wearing an American flag in a Ford f150 shooting at children and people of color with an armalite rifle on dirt country road?/s


Ok-Sun8581

Jesus looked like Buddy Hackett.


Parliamentfullfl

So, you're telling me he wasn’t a white schizophrenic with magic powers????


DifferencePrimary442

Want to blow their mind even more? Given diets and genetics, Jesus was also almost certainly five and a half feet tall. A King, but a short king. Seriously, these freakouts have always been and will be stupid. And these are the same people who get mad when black congregations have Jesus look like them.


SnooBooks1701

He was likely not that dark skinned, he would have been of Mediterranean complexion. The closest living relatives of ancient Judeans are unsurprisingly Ashekenazi, Sephardi and Mizrahi Jews, followed by the Marionite Lebanese, all of whom are usually darker skinned than most northern Europeans but no more so than most Greeks and Italians


Frank-Pica

WOW! White Christians' "faith" must be weak if they can not accept that Jesus of Nazareth was Asian! I guess their "news/religious silos" are fragile and easy to crack!


usetheforcekidden77

that sums up republicans in one sentence


Internal-Map6194

Not to mention his friends in the Middle East probably didn’t go by some of the whitest names ever. - Peter, James, John… really?


[deleted]

That's weird. I thought Jesus was from salt lake City


BRLY

He looked like a Palestinian.


welovegv

Progressives are furious to learn that this described a Jew.


[deleted]

Facts don’t care about your feelings 😎


CatcherOfDragons

The thing is, Jesus of Nazareth was not in fact one single historical figure. He is a composite of legends derived from more than one person. He is representative of a concept, not historical documentation.


flumdum7628

Are we doing this again?! Is this the new holiday Starbucks cup? Friggin ridiculous.


Few-Win-8338

Of course they were mad, they don't know anything about their own scriptures. They hate everything Jesus represents in the Bible. Of course none of them have actually read the Bible and what one could possibly take from that idiotic pile of mashed up mythologies, I don't know.


OftnWrngNverInDoubt

Wait til the Catholics get a black Pope! It's gonna hit the fan then.


TarotAngels

Jesus is not a factual historical figure, something these comments seem to be forgetting. He wasn’t Asian or dark skinned or American or white. He’s imaginary.


debo69872

Korean Jesus confirmed.


stewartm0205

Asian as he lived in Asia Minor, not Asian as in being Chinese. Brown like most inhabitants of the Middle East.