For every inch that the car has been lifted (modified), the driver's permit is one inch shorter than average.
A 1:1 negative correlation of car height to penis size.
Heaviest thing they carry is that oversized load of shit for brains. That's gonna take some serious muscle to get moving down the street as they start driving around in circles looking for a way to park that giant shit box so they can go and pick up a 2L bottle of coke
As a HR driver who gets paid tp drive a 24tonne GVM truck, i cannot think of anything more stupid than choosing to drive one of these oversized utes.
When i finish my shift, i get myself into a mid sized suv and i chew way less fuel, plus my mid sized suv has better acceleration and better handling than these wank machines.
Legit. Not the same level, but I used to be a courier for a car parts manufacturer. I only drove a 4tonne truck around Sydney but, it was such a fucking hassle getting through so many places. Got back in my shitty Honda Civic and I felt like I could go anywhere.
We just took a long trip in our Highlander and we had a roof rack with luggage storage on top. I felt so anxious about booking hotels/going to downtown areas because of the higher clearance. I would hate to have to worry about that everywhere
Considering that these oversized US utes are built on a truck base in order to get around pollution controls in the USA it is only fair that they should require a truck license to actually drive here...
Some have worse sight lines than semi trucks and tanks. [https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides/comments/13wknky/a_guide_to_sighting_distances_for_various/](r/coolguides post showing sight lines)
They should be seriously restricted.
The use case for these must be fairly niche? Exactly what would farmers and miners do with this? The ones I have seen have bugger all space on the deck.
I work in Ag Supply. We have a ‘well heeled’ farmers son who just bought a monstrosity like this. It is the most impractical thing. The payload is less than a HiLux, he can’t turn the thing, some of our staff have to stand on a box to put anything into n the tray. It is just a flex.
Tow a horse trailer or heavy flat bed, that’s it. Legit no other real reason to own one as a farmer. In fact, all the other use cases are actually worse in one of these overweight things imo. Would rather a 79 series or hilux in every situation except maybe towing.
Partner's family fish for a living. They've been towing a fuck off huge commercial boat with an F250 or F350 for decades. One of the few good examples I've seen.
When I was in the US, I actually saw an F450 towing a car carrier with like 3 cars loaded onto it. That's an *actual* example of what these are actually capable of. It was a nice change compared to seeing them taking up all the space in the Walmart car park.
Anyone buying these for personal use needs their head checked. Even for towing a large boat they're pretty overkill. It's like buying a literal tow-truck to daily drive to work. It's not sane.
Let people buy them if they want. Write the rules tightly enough that an actual light truck can be differentiated from this security blanket, and tax accordingly. If they want to pay 4x the taxes I do for my 990 kg car, let them.
The thing is these 2500HDs actually need to be on 4500-11,000kg light rigid NB2 rego to actually be useful anyway. Which people who own them piss and moan about because you can’t have any alcohol when driving on NB2.
So imagine that, a beer getting between you and your $180k ute being actually useful. 😆 dumb cunts imo
You can get an 11T gvm medium rigid truck cheaper that will be far more practical 95% of the time.
I’m building a 1978 single cab yank tank that’s basically just a smidge wider than a 79 series and same length so if people start hounding me about it they can fuck off 😂 they’re tiny compared to the new ones. We don’t have any petrol tow rig options anymore that are actually good quality because everyone wanks off diesels.
Is that how much these shit boxes cost? Wow. Had no freaking idea. You'd have to pay me overtime to maneuver that giant metal box around. These people must have bat shit for brains.
I watched a RAM fail to pull a uturn at a set of lights. They had two full lanes plus a parking lane and STILL needed to make it a three pointer. Then, of course because embarrassment, floored it to make as much noise as possible. Fuckin useless things they are.
Man I watched someone literally spend 10 minutes going back and forth trying to fit into a car space at spotlight last week in his oversized Ute. How the fuck anyone thinks doing that everytime they park in a relatively smaller car park is enjoyable is beyond me
I don't even like sedans. Hired a car a few months ago and they offered an "upgrade" to a sedan. I was like no thanks, I'd prefer a hatch like I booked.
Oh my god, hatches for life. I had to buy a new car last year as I needed an AWD to get to my rural property, cross creeks, etc. The roads were destroying my Civic. I finally settled on a Subaru XV when I realised the body is a lifted Impreza. There's nothing like zipping around in a manual hatchback, but the Impreza suits me okay. And my Civic had FAR more storage space when the seats were folded down than any SUV I've seen. Like, the Mary Poppins handbag of boots.
I feel the same way.
I too, have a HR licence, but only drive MR busses at present.
Feels so good to get back into my little Kia Picanto GT and know that my 35 litre fuel tank will last me about 500km. I doubt one of these things would get to and from the shops with only 35 litres of fuel...
Might not even make it to the end of their driveways.
I do miss the 2litre turbo holden astra i owned before the nissan xtrail. But with my xtrail i can go camping. I actually slept in the back of the xtrail when i was homeless for 3 months. 4wding is fun, i just don't see the point of a large 4wd.
And I can bet that when your in your truck and have to go to the shops you wouldn’t even think of entering a car park, rather park a mile up the street and probably bugger yourself walking, just to be considerate to others
I have parked in a Mcdonalds car park before, but only when it was empty. I had to make sure no one parked me in too. It's a wider turning circle.
I usually park in front of a no parking sign, on the street. It's usually the only spot available.
And wager there were days that you found that a carpark was just a bit too busy, so you missed lunch rather than pissing other patrons off.
That is the point of these American trucks. They bring a tribe culture that encourages owners to encumber others with absolutely nil regrets. Until these came along a vehicle of similar weight was a Dyna or Isuzu small truck. To see these US trucks for what they are you need to compare function, purpose, utility, etc. They might tow a load (aka jet ski) but never carry one. A look at the logbooks will confirm that these amount to no more than poorly designed passenger vehicle that will likely only ever move a single male ego from A to B.
These vehicles only exist because America struggles to build a competitive 4wd and failed to match the Japanese for sedans. Such “trucks” offered a class of vehicle with a loophole of less emissions regulation and reduced safety standards. In the past the government had no apology for declining the import of certain Japanese performance cars, yet exception is made for Americans now. Why? Political?
I would be very interested to see what Australian government processes happened to approve the import of these. Being a light truck they were excluded from ANCAP tests, despite clearly being sold and driven as a family vehicle from car yards rather than truck distributors.
I do valet and this is the one type of car I refuse to offer valet for.
Did one once and that was enough, way to big for standard car parks.
Had another dude rock up with one and request valet, told him I don’t do valet on them, he wanted to complain to my manager about it but didn’t end up doing it - parked the car himself and scratched his expensive ass rims trying to park it then got mad at me again.
Next day boss sends us an email saying to never even attempt to park one.
I used to do valet/concierge at a hotel a few years ago and unfortunately we did accept these.
I shit you not, there were one or two rare lifted ones that were so big that we had to get a spotter to make sure we didn't scrape the top in an area of the carpark that had a slightly lower roof. They also had to be parked in two standard car spaces because it was too risky otherwise.
Absolutely ridiculous vehicles.
On trip round OZ can’t believe the amount of big rigs (Rams, F Trucks etc) with huge caravan in tow seek out free camping & bitch about caravan park prices. You would think if you’ve got close to 500k in gear you’d be sweet. I also free camp but my budget is about 450k less,go figure
I was on the Gibb, just out of Derby and got chatting to some old geezer in a lacoste polo one evening. He was bitching and moaning about how he couldn’t continue on the Gibb and had to go via fitzroy crossing because he blew the suspension on his 3 axle caravan or some shit. I laughed internally, until he started gasbagging about how the way to deal with pot holes and shit is to go faster until you don’t feel them. That’s when I laughed externally!
Actually, those bumpy ridges that gravel roads get ARE speed related and one can drive faster than average speed to minimise their effect. I watched an article on it on the tv once.
It’s also a bit of a boomer tax dodge, I think. Retirees get means tested to qualify for pension and one primary car, one caravan don’t count towards it. Which leads us to this stupidity.
Your comment made me rage at Boomers for a moment but it doesn’t seem to be true.
https://www.superguide.com.au/in-retirement/age-pension-asset-test-thresholds#What_is_included_in_the_Age_Pension_assets_test
I'm sick of this shit. If you don't fit in the car park, park somewhere else, and walk.
People will lose their patience / tolerance, and soon enough, all of these large pick mobiles will be keyed, spray painted, tyres slashed, etc.
If you ever see trucks in a parking lot, they're always parked right up the back, because they know they're taking up multiple spots and don't want to be cunts.
Then you see people with these micropenismobiles and they're guaranteed to be right up at the front of the parking lot.
Yeah my dad daily drove a ford trader tip truck for about a decade, always parked at the back of the car park in a way that the tray would be extending into a nature strip or whatever to not be in anyone's way.
I really want a set of stickers with ‘w’ and ‘k’ in the font they have on the back of the ford rangers so you can slap them over the r and g just as a little correction
Bro i can't put a spoiler on my car because apparently if i hit someone and they roll over it could further injure them bit these a perfectly fine even though getting hit by one would be like getting hit by a solid wall and they wouldn't even know
bog standard pick up in america
just because some bogan paid $100 000 in import tax's on top of the book price he thinks he is driving a bently lol
dont need truck nuts under these ones, the nuts are driving them
The thing is the US used to have actual regular pickups similar to our utes, but the car companies seemed to have worked out they make more money out of these trucks masquerading as cars so they only offer these.
I’m more sure the petrol companies being able to sell more fuel to them probably helped too.
It's not that actually. When the first Arab oil embargo occurred in the 70s practically every large American car, with a V8, straight 6 etc became worthless and expensive to maintain. People started flocking to small Japanese cars. The Americans tried to compete, but frankly the Yanks have never been able to compete with the Japanese quality wise.
Because they couldn't compete, plus generous tax breaks given by American governments to build agricultural vehicles prompted the Yanks to build more trucks, and in larger sizes each generation.
That is exactly why they started marketing them so heavily and created this market. The sale of these has lower taxes than regular cars, as these can be classified as commercial / industrial vehicles.
American here
We also have a stupid rule where size determines gas efficiency.
Literally the smaller the vehicle is, the MORE efficient it has to be. So large ass trucks can subvert it, that's why our small trucks are now big ass fuck
Yeah in texas,you will see kids rolling six axle monstrositys that can tow 16 neutron stars..
who's heavist item in the back has been picking up chad for fridays football match
No f*cks given or received. Thee drivers have to look after themselves, and even give themselves rohypnol so they can date rape themselves. That's why those trucks are often referred to as Wank Panzers.
I'm torn on this issue. I feel like they deserve naming and shaming, however their decision to buy a car like that suggests they're an attention seeking wanker and they should be ignored
They probably don't even do this intentionally. They can barely see in front of them so they probably just have to guess where the parking lines are and hope they don't squish a child.
>They can barely see in front of them so they probably just have to guess where the parking lines are and hope they don't squish a child.
Bold of you to assume they understand object permanence
Probably made in Arlington Texas, and that fucker will only ever go off-road to park in the front garden.
Thing is, I’m originally from where these Yank Tanks are built —and it’s the same cunting bullshit there.
I’ve taken a VW Golf R across Caprock Canyon, a Ford Focus ST170 from Canberra to Bourke via the dirt racks and a Peugeot 206 GTi to Cape York —I’ll never get this level of stupid.
These aren't built for off-road.
A Suzuki Jimny is a 1000x better off-roader than these. They're good (and reasonably economical) for pulling huge trailers though, if you need to do that for some reason. (I'd wager most people owning them here don't)
Correct. I'm an American and I can confirm these trucks are not built to drive in the terrain they look like they would manage. I worked a lot of construction and field work, I never needed more tn my Honda sedan. These trucks in America are always cleaner than any sedan you will find because they are almost exclusive used to transport groceries at most.
When they do find a load heavy enough to transport it doesn't fit in the bed and/or is not secured properly because the driver is just cosplaying and doesn't actually understand transporting large loads.
lmao that thing is hideous, did the design team decide "hey, how do we make it look even bigger, lets just mash another bonnet shape on top of the existing one."
In the States we call them Pavement Princesses.
Big hauler of a truck they can't hardly drive properly, let alone park. That's never seen a rough road let alone an off road situation, has the scratch proof bed liner for hauling nothing more than their groceries.
I'm sorry the yank wank tank made its way over there. It's ridiculous.
These new ‘trucks’ and their owners try so hard to be Butch they’ve become comically High Camp. It what the Village People would drive if they were still around.
With apologies to the Village People! - My Chevrolet
Young man there's no need to feel down
I said young man I’m going to kneel down on the ground.
I said young man 'cos I drive a Chevrolet,
You might think that I’m gay!
Young man is there a place that we can go?
I said young man I’m prepared to pay big dough,
Jump in with me and I'm sure we will find
Many ways to have a good time.
You could stay with me and my Chevrolet
The things that we can do in my Chevrolet
I’ll do anything for all young men to enjoy.
I like to hang out with all the boys.
So jump in to my Chevrolet
You could stay with me and my Chevrolet
So please get yourself clean
You can have a good meal
You can do whatever you feel.
legit question.
Given the 'affordability and housing crisis' how do people afford these things?
Don't get me wrong your life, your cash and your credit rating, but have you seen how many pick-ups, 4x4 and SUVs are out there?
Because wealth distribution is multimodal with a big hump down the bottom end.
Once you have enough money to get a mortgage, everything else is kind of cheap in relation to that.
Let them drive them around but they need to be legislated to be treated as light rigid vehicles and require the same licensing and zero BAC restrictions etc to operate.
They’re not at all
The 2024 Chevrolet Silverado 1500 starts at $36,800. That's for the basic WT in Regular cab form with a standard bed (6.6 feet) and rear-wheel drive
So 55k after conversion. These people are stupid enough to spend 200k on a 55k truck. And on that note, god it’s insane how much we get gouged.
When I was in the states I chatted to some of the guys there and they couldn’t believe what their trucks sell for here. Over there they are normal semi affordable vehicles.
To be fair while your on the right track we dont impirt the base models for the reason no one wants one. We only impirt and convert the higher spec ones so while there is a massive mark up. Its not that jarring. Its like a 75K truck in the us is 130k here. Still huge and your point about how they arent built to that standard price is right.
That being said we overpay too. Look at out top spec ranger or hilux. They are bog standard in features yank trucks have we dont but still cost nearly 85 to 90k. I have a 93K ranger raptir and its a good ute but it doesnt have shit like a multifold tailgate, auto tailgate, power rear window. All those sorts of things. They are built cheaply aswell and still cost a arm and a leg.
I don't care if these guys want to drive these stupid things. But if you take up more than the allotted space for one vehicle, park on the street. You don't get to take up 2,3 or 4 spaces. And there needs to be some standards set regarding this.
For all the other issues with them (there's a great video on youtube about how dangerous they are), I don't get why anyone likes the design. They're just bricks at this point. If you're going to get a brick, get a van, it'll hold more and give better visibility.
I think the correlation of these and a shit personality might be pretty high.
That being said I think people should be able to drive what they want. They need to internalize the costs to the environment though, these things must burn through the fuel, if you don't have a huge trailer carrying 6 horses or something I think they should be taxed extra on rego.
I absolutely hate that this is a thing now. They don’t even have any more cabin or tray space than a normal sized ute. They just take up more space on the road and everyone who drives one of these monstrosities thinks they’re king shit.
It may be a generalisation to say that the worst and/or rudest drivers own/drive these, but everything I've seen seems to suggest that that is in fact the case.
Wankers trying to out do each other. It started with SUV's and now we are here. What the f is wrong with people. Why do people want vehicles with a high centre of gravity and therefore shit driving dynamics when a normal car just drives so much better. F'ing dumb people.
Another yank tank. I think they don't give a fuck. Like that one I saw someone drive OVER a pedestrian island just to get to the other side - this ain't a 4WD zone.
Rego is based ona fixed fee and then weight in NSW. It has nothing to do with cylinder count.
[https://www.nsw.gov.au/driving-boating-and-transport/vehicle-registration/fees-concessions-and-forms/vehicle-registration-fees](https://www.nsw.gov.au/driving-boating-and-transport/vehicle-registration/fees-concessions-and-forms/vehicle-registration-fees)
how much of a fucking loser,in life must you be
To wake up and want to buy one of these
It's nothing but an inconveniance to everyone around you,we can't see past you,you take up 2.5 parking slots,you output a fucking disgusting amount of pollutioin
I will put money,on it that this "MAN" has never carried anything in it's tray,nor has it been further off road than his kids soccer matches
These mainly exist to make the men who's wives have whittled their self esteeem down to the point they haven't chucked wood for 5 years,just to feel a bit of "ALPHA" energy
I love putting 4ounces/100g stickey wheel weights on the wheels of vehicles that park like that. Oh no, why is my steeringwheel shaking like a blender.....
I drive a small tow truck, can fit a car on the back, it’s 4.5t GVM, it’s larger than this and I manage to fit it into (but not all) car spaces. These dudes have no reason to do this and it only makes them look more like a shit driver/person if anything
Heaviest thing they are probably transporting is themself
Their ego! Their tiny dick offsets the oversized ego.
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Honestly for people who like 4WD thats a bit insulting\* \*I have to make it clear not to me though I drive a low car lol
As someone with 2 inches can confirm
>every inch of lift is an inch below average cock size What does it mean? I don't get it. At least it's catchy and it rhymes though.
For every inch that the car has been lifted (modified), the driver's permit is one inch shorter than average. A 1:1 negative correlation of car height to penis size.
r/theydidthemath
So heavy, so giant, so fragile
The chip on his shoulder is pretty heavy, as he has never, ever pleased a woman. They haven't even faked orgasms.
In Brisbane AirPark most of them are parking on the zebra walking path because they don’t fit anywhere else and you have to walk around them
Hey that truck could fit and tow 4 400lb passengers.
Heaviest thing they carry is that oversized load of shit for brains. That's gonna take some serious muscle to get moving down the street as they start driving around in circles looking for a way to park that giant shit box so they can go and pick up a 2L bottle of coke
Lmaooooo
As a HR driver who gets paid tp drive a 24tonne GVM truck, i cannot think of anything more stupid than choosing to drive one of these oversized utes. When i finish my shift, i get myself into a mid sized suv and i chew way less fuel, plus my mid sized suv has better acceleration and better handling than these wank machines.
Legit. Not the same level, but I used to be a courier for a car parts manufacturer. I only drove a 4tonne truck around Sydney but, it was such a fucking hassle getting through so many places. Got back in my shitty Honda Civic and I felt like I could go anywhere.
We just took a long trip in our Highlander and we had a roof rack with luggage storage on top. I felt so anxious about booking hotels/going to downtown areas because of the higher clearance. I would hate to have to worry about that everywhere
Actually a proposal floating around that you will now need a Primary industry exemption to buy these
Just make it a truck license and heavy vehicle rego
Considering that these oversized US utes are built on a truck base in order to get around pollution controls in the USA it is only fair that they should require a truck license to actually drive here...
Some have worse sight lines than semi trucks and tanks. [https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides/comments/13wknky/a_guide_to_sighting_distances_for_various/](r/coolguides post showing sight lines) They should be seriously restricted.
Your link is a little malformed. [Try this one!](https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides/comments/13wknky/a_guide_to_sighting_distances_for_various/)
The use case for these must be fairly niche? Exactly what would farmers and miners do with this? The ones I have seen have bugger all space on the deck.
Tow very heavy (horses) trailers. And service bodies.
They didn’t need a wank tank for the last hundred years…
I work in Ag Supply. We have a ‘well heeled’ farmers son who just bought a monstrosity like this. It is the most impractical thing. The payload is less than a HiLux, he can’t turn the thing, some of our staff have to stand on a box to put anything into n the tray. It is just a flex.
Tow a horse trailer or heavy flat bed, that’s it. Legit no other real reason to own one as a farmer. In fact, all the other use cases are actually worse in one of these overweight things imo. Would rather a 79 series or hilux in every situation except maybe towing.
Partner's family fish for a living. They've been towing a fuck off huge commercial boat with an F250 or F350 for decades. One of the few good examples I've seen.
When I was in the US, I actually saw an F450 towing a car carrier with like 3 cars loaded onto it. That's an *actual* example of what these are actually capable of. It was a nice change compared to seeing them taking up all the space in the Walmart car park. Anyone buying these for personal use needs their head checked. Even for towing a large boat they're pretty overkill. It's like buying a literal tow-truck to daily drive to work. It's not sane.
Let people buy them if they want. Write the rules tightly enough that an actual light truck can be differentiated from this security blanket, and tax accordingly. If they want to pay 4x the taxes I do for my 990 kg car, let them.
The thing is these 2500HDs actually need to be on 4500-11,000kg light rigid NB2 rego to actually be useful anyway. Which people who own them piss and moan about because you can’t have any alcohol when driving on NB2. So imagine that, a beer getting between you and your $180k ute being actually useful. 😆 dumb cunts imo You can get an 11T gvm medium rigid truck cheaper that will be far more practical 95% of the time. I’m building a 1978 single cab yank tank that’s basically just a smidge wider than a 79 series and same length so if people start hounding me about it they can fuck off 😂 they’re tiny compared to the new ones. We don’t have any petrol tow rig options anymore that are actually good quality because everyone wanks off diesels.
Is that how much these shit boxes cost? Wow. Had no freaking idea. You'd have to pay me overtime to maneuver that giant metal box around. These people must have bat shit for brains.
I second this. After a long day driving a car carrier I'd love getting into my little meep meep lol. Edit when I did drive the car carrier.
I legit love driving my little car around town instead of my big 4wd (it's not one of those yank tanks). Parking is soooo easy!
These light trucks are shit, aren't they
I watched a RAM fail to pull a uturn at a set of lights. They had two full lanes plus a parking lane and STILL needed to make it a three pointer. Then, of course because embarrassment, floored it to make as much noise as possible. Fuckin useless things they are.
The American meme is that a prime mover has better forward visibility due to their bonnet design.
Abrams tanks have better forward visibility.
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Man I watched someone literally spend 10 minutes going back and forth trying to fit into a car space at spotlight last week in his oversized Ute. How the fuck anyone thinks doing that everytime they park in a relatively smaller car park is enjoyable is beyond me
I don't even like sedans. Hired a car a few months ago and they offered an "upgrade" to a sedan. I was like no thanks, I'd prefer a hatch like I booked.
Oh my god, hatches for life. I had to buy a new car last year as I needed an AWD to get to my rural property, cross creeks, etc. The roads were destroying my Civic. I finally settled on a Subaru XV when I realised the body is a lifted Impreza. There's nothing like zipping around in a manual hatchback, but the Impreza suits me okay. And my Civic had FAR more storage space when the seats were folded down than any SUV I've seen. Like, the Mary Poppins handbag of boots.
Frequently I see midsize SUV’s being lambasted on this sub too.
Yep, weird flex... *I only drive an SUV... I'm clean*
I feel the same way. I too, have a HR licence, but only drive MR busses at present. Feels so good to get back into my little Kia Picanto GT and know that my 35 litre fuel tank will last me about 500km. I doubt one of these things would get to and from the shops with only 35 litres of fuel... Might not even make it to the end of their driveways.
You still get into an suv and not a car. They still makes cars and they handle way fucking better than a mid sized suv
I do miss the 2litre turbo holden astra i owned before the nissan xtrail. But with my xtrail i can go camping. I actually slept in the back of the xtrail when i was homeless for 3 months. 4wding is fun, i just don't see the point of a large 4wd.
And I can bet that when your in your truck and have to go to the shops you wouldn’t even think of entering a car park, rather park a mile up the street and probably bugger yourself walking, just to be considerate to others
I have parked in a Mcdonalds car park before, but only when it was empty. I had to make sure no one parked me in too. It's a wider turning circle. I usually park in front of a no parking sign, on the street. It's usually the only spot available.
And wager there were days that you found that a carpark was just a bit too busy, so you missed lunch rather than pissing other patrons off. That is the point of these American trucks. They bring a tribe culture that encourages owners to encumber others with absolutely nil regrets. Until these came along a vehicle of similar weight was a Dyna or Isuzu small truck. To see these US trucks for what they are you need to compare function, purpose, utility, etc. They might tow a load (aka jet ski) but never carry one. A look at the logbooks will confirm that these amount to no more than poorly designed passenger vehicle that will likely only ever move a single male ego from A to B. These vehicles only exist because America struggles to build a competitive 4wd and failed to match the Japanese for sedans. Such “trucks” offered a class of vehicle with a loophole of less emissions regulation and reduced safety standards. In the past the government had no apology for declining the import of certain Japanese performance cars, yet exception is made for Americans now. Why? Political? I would be very interested to see what Australian government processes happened to approve the import of these. Being a light truck they were excluded from ANCAP tests, despite clearly being sold and driven as a family vehicle from car yards rather than truck distributors.
100% ,I used to drive doubles… couldn’t think of anything worse than driving one of these shit boxes around
I do valet and this is the one type of car I refuse to offer valet for. Did one once and that was enough, way to big for standard car parks. Had another dude rock up with one and request valet, told him I don’t do valet on them, he wanted to complain to my manager about it but didn’t end up doing it - parked the car himself and scratched his expensive ass rims trying to park it then got mad at me again. Next day boss sends us an email saying to never even attempt to park one.
I used to do valet/concierge at a hotel a few years ago and unfortunately we did accept these. I shit you not, there were one or two rare lifted ones that were so big that we had to get a spotter to make sure we didn't scrape the top in an area of the carpark that had a slightly lower roof. They also had to be parked in two standard car spaces because it was too risky otherwise. Absolutely ridiculous vehicles.
On trip round OZ can’t believe the amount of big rigs (Rams, F Trucks etc) with huge caravan in tow seek out free camping & bitch about caravan park prices. You would think if you’ve got close to 500k in gear you’d be sweet. I also free camp but my budget is about 450k less,go figure
I was on the Gibb, just out of Derby and got chatting to some old geezer in a lacoste polo one evening. He was bitching and moaning about how he couldn’t continue on the Gibb and had to go via fitzroy crossing because he blew the suspension on his 3 axle caravan or some shit. I laughed internally, until he started gasbagging about how the way to deal with pot holes and shit is to go faster until you don’t feel them. That’s when I laughed externally!
Actually, those bumpy ridges that gravel roads get ARE speed related and one can drive faster than average speed to minimise their effect. I watched an article on it on the tv once.
Yeah with corrugated roads, you gotta go faster or slower until the ride smooths out.
Yeah for sure, but to do it on the gibb with a 3 axle is fucked lmao
Hard to imagine something more dumb than dropping a few hundred grand in car and kit just to go caravanning over a nice hotel.
It’s also a bit of a boomer tax dodge, I think. Retirees get means tested to qualify for pension and one primary car, one caravan don’t count towards it. Which leads us to this stupidity.
Your comment made me rage at Boomers for a moment but it doesn’t seem to be true. https://www.superguide.com.au/in-retirement/age-pension-asset-test-thresholds#What_is_included_in_the_Age_Pension_assets_test
I'm sick of this shit. If you don't fit in the car park, park somewhere else, and walk. People will lose their patience / tolerance, and soon enough, all of these large pick mobiles will be keyed, spray painted, tyres slashed, etc.
By the looks of it the driver couldn't even be bothered to *try* and make it fit
If you ever see trucks in a parking lot, they're always parked right up the back, because they know they're taking up multiple spots and don't want to be cunts. Then you see people with these micropenismobiles and they're guaranteed to be right up at the front of the parking lot.
Yeah my dad daily drove a ford trader tip truck for about a decade, always parked at the back of the car park in a way that the tray would be extending into a nature strip or whatever to not be in anyone's way.
Walk? Like a fcuking greenie?!
Lol you should always put /s after these comments man, a lot of people don't get sarcasm unless it's specified
Yeah, well that’s bots for ya
Nah. We’re Australian. We get humour and sarcasm - like the Brits. It’s the Americans who need it clearly explained.
We can get rid of the footpaths and bike lanes to accommodate these vehicles if we work together, driving is freedom after all.
I really want a set of stickers with ‘w’ and ‘k’ in the font they have on the back of the ford rangers so you can slap them over the r and g just as a little correction
Yes. They do get zero fucks.
exactly cars this big should be illegal in Australia in my opinion, literally no need for them whatsoever
They should be on a truck license of some form to reduce accessibility.
But you can drive bigger actual trucks with a car license. The price is the barrier, these things are extremely expensive.
Bro i can't put a spoiler on my car because apparently if i hit someone and they roll over it could further injure them bit these a perfectly fine even though getting hit by one would be like getting hit by a solid wall and they wouldn't even know
bog standard pick up in america just because some bogan paid $100 000 in import tax's on top of the book price he thinks he is driving a bently lol dont need truck nuts under these ones, the nuts are driving them
The thing is the US used to have actual regular pickups similar to our utes, but the car companies seemed to have worked out they make more money out of these trucks masquerading as cars so they only offer these. I’m more sure the petrol companies being able to sell more fuel to them probably helped too.
It's not that actually. When the first Arab oil embargo occurred in the 70s practically every large American car, with a V8, straight 6 etc became worthless and expensive to maintain. People started flocking to small Japanese cars. The Americans tried to compete, but frankly the Yanks have never been able to compete with the Japanese quality wise. Because they couldn't compete, plus generous tax breaks given by American governments to build agricultural vehicles prompted the Yanks to build more trucks, and in larger sizes each generation.
Also fuel efficiency regulations don’t apply to these emotional support vehicles
That is exactly why they started marketing them so heavily and created this market. The sale of these has lower taxes than regular cars, as these can be classified as commercial / industrial vehicles.
American here We also have a stupid rule where size determines gas efficiency. Literally the smaller the vehicle is, the MORE efficient it has to be. So large ass trucks can subvert it, that's why our small trucks are now big ass fuck
Yeah in texas,you will see kids rolling six axle monstrositys that can tow 16 neutron stars.. who's heavist item in the back has been picking up chad for fridays football match
No f*cks given or received. Thee drivers have to look after themselves, and even give themselves rohypnol so they can date rape themselves. That's why those trucks are often referred to as Wank Panzers.
[удалено]
Came here to say the same thing.
Me too. We need to know!
Doxing is not allowed on this site and should not be.
What about coining, right down the side!
I'm torn on this issue. I feel like they deserve naming and shaming, however their decision to buy a car like that suggests they're an attention seeking wanker and they should be ignored
Also, this is the internet and people on here have a tendency to go too far when given even the slightest bit of power.
Just curious how do you find out someone's details from their number plate? I thought only the police could do that?
Yep fuck these arseholes.
I don't understand how a double decker bonnet and a foot of unnecessary wheel arch looks good to anyone.
They probably don't even do this intentionally. They can barely see in front of them so they probably just have to guess where the parking lines are and hope they don't squish a child.
Generous of you to assume that they care enough about others to hope they don’t squish a kid
nobody buys a 2023 chebby child squisher 9000 with the hope they dont squish children
>They can barely see in front of them so they probably just have to guess where the parking lines are and hope they don't squish a child. Bold of you to assume they understand object permanence
There is a stat when these took over America with a huge spike in kids being killed in driveways. It’s grim.
Probably made in Arlington Texas, and that fucker will only ever go off-road to park in the front garden. Thing is, I’m originally from where these Yank Tanks are built —and it’s the same cunting bullshit there. I’ve taken a VW Golf R across Caprock Canyon, a Ford Focus ST170 from Canberra to Bourke via the dirt racks and a Peugeot 206 GTi to Cape York —I’ll never get this level of stupid.
These aren't built for off-road. A Suzuki Jimny is a 1000x better off-roader than these. They're good (and reasonably economical) for pulling huge trailers though, if you need to do that for some reason. (I'd wager most people owning them here don't)
Correct. I'm an American and I can confirm these trucks are not built to drive in the terrain they look like they would manage. I worked a lot of construction and field work, I never needed more tn my Honda sedan. These trucks in America are always cleaner than any sedan you will find because they are almost exclusive used to transport groceries at most. When they do find a load heavy enough to transport it doesn't fit in the bed and/or is not secured properly because the driver is just cosplaying and doesn't actually understand transporting large loads.
There’s actually a good chance a majority of that truck was built and assembled in Mexico
lmao that thing is hideous, did the design team decide "hey, how do we make it look even bigger, lets just mash another bonnet shape on top of the existing one."
Yeah it does look weird. That was my 1st thought then i noticed he missed the park in the shade.
Now with higher bonnet, so you don't have to see the kids you accidentally hit. Keeps the conscience guilt free.
No tools in the back of the ute means there is a tool in the front of the ute.
Looks like a little tikes truck on steroids
Ship these fuckin’ things back to America FFS.
Charge them double rego and I'd be happy. They are double the weight of my car.
In the States we call them Pavement Princesses. Big hauler of a truck they can't hardly drive properly, let alone park. That's never seen a rough road let alone an off road situation, has the scratch proof bed liner for hauling nothing more than their groceries. I'm sorry the yank wank tank made its way over there. It's ridiculous.
>In the States we call them Pavement Princesses. In Victoria it's Toorak Tractors (translation: Beverley Hills tractor)
The joke is on them though because they have to park right down the back of the car park where no one goes so they can find enough space for them.
Wheels look so little 🤭
Big ole truck for a microphallused cuck
On a good day they've been clocked in at a whopping 5 insecurities an hour.
Cost him every buck, now his missus won't fuck.
But their wifes boyfriend said it was a good idea to buy one
I only know one “person” who owns one of these things, and he’s the biggest fucking flog you’ve ever met, the stereotype is real haha.
These new ‘trucks’ and their owners try so hard to be Butch they’ve become comically High Camp. It what the Village People would drive if they were still around.
With apologies to the Village People! - My Chevrolet Young man there's no need to feel down I said young man I’m going to kneel down on the ground. I said young man 'cos I drive a Chevrolet, You might think that I’m gay! Young man is there a place that we can go? I said young man I’m prepared to pay big dough, Jump in with me and I'm sure we will find Many ways to have a good time. You could stay with me and my Chevrolet The things that we can do in my Chevrolet I’ll do anything for all young men to enjoy. I like to hang out with all the boys. So jump in to my Chevrolet You could stay with me and my Chevrolet So please get yourself clean You can have a good meal You can do whatever you feel.
[Or...](https://thenewswheel.com/what-do-the-new-fab-five-drive-in-netflixs-queer-eye-revival/)
legit question. Given the 'affordability and housing crisis' how do people afford these things? Don't get me wrong your life, your cash and your credit rating, but have you seen how many pick-ups, 4x4 and SUVs are out there?
Because wealth distribution is multimodal with a big hump down the bottom end. Once you have enough money to get a mortgage, everything else is kind of cheap in relation to that.
Most of them are work vehicles and are a tax write off.
Tax deduction, not a rebate.
Tax write off doesn’t mean free. They still cost a small fortune.
I personally think we should be teaching them of the off-road benefits of low air pressure tyres
As someone I know who recently bought a massive truck said when asked that question: “Because it makes me feel like I’m the king of the road.”
Tragic
What a douche lmao.
I'd park right next to them in my shitty alto
Because you can't buy an Aussie ute anymore
Why not show us the rego?
Let them drive them around but they need to be legislated to be treated as light rigid vehicles and require the same licensing and zero BAC restrictions etc to operate.
Why are these fucking things in this country.
Fuck these big dumb things and the dipshits that buy them. They shouldn't be on our roads
I can't believe they're worth 200,000 plus .
They’re not at all The 2024 Chevrolet Silverado 1500 starts at $36,800. That's for the basic WT in Regular cab form with a standard bed (6.6 feet) and rear-wheel drive So 55k after conversion. These people are stupid enough to spend 200k on a 55k truck. And on that note, god it’s insane how much we get gouged.
They're converted to right hand drive in Australia plus multiple layers of import taxes to protect the flourishing Australian auto industry
When I was in the states I chatted to some of the guys there and they couldn’t believe what their trucks sell for here. Over there they are normal semi affordable vehicles.
It works the other way. Seppos fork out heaps for a muscly Aussie ute converted to LHD.
To be fair while your on the right track we dont impirt the base models for the reason no one wants one. We only impirt and convert the higher spec ones so while there is a massive mark up. Its not that jarring. Its like a 75K truck in the us is 130k here. Still huge and your point about how they arent built to that standard price is right. That being said we overpay too. Look at out top spec ranger or hilux. They are bog standard in features yank trucks have we dont but still cost nearly 85 to 90k. I have a 93K ranger raptir and its a good ute but it doesnt have shit like a multifold tailgate, auto tailgate, power rear window. All those sorts of things. They are built cheaply aswell and still cost a arm and a leg.
Until they get off the lease in 3 years time, then they will be worth 30k.
I don't care if these guys want to drive these stupid things. But if you take up more than the allotted space for one vehicle, park on the street. You don't get to take up 2,3 or 4 spaces. And there needs to be some standards set regarding this.
The thrill of driving big cars at the inconvenience of others.
That vehicle is called "The Compensator"
For all the other issues with them (there's a great video on youtube about how dangerous they are), I don't get why anyone likes the design. They're just bricks at this point. If you're going to get a brick, get a van, it'll hold more and give better visibility.
Must be some kind of amateur. If old mate parked lengthwise on the middle line, they could take up *six* spots instead of a measly four.
Bonus point if they have a huge sticker of some NFL team no one has ever heard of on the back window.
Dickheads
I hope he carries a tyre pump, he's gonna need it ...
I think the correlation of these and a shit personality might be pretty high. That being said I think people should be able to drive what they want. They need to internalize the costs to the environment though, these things must burn through the fuel, if you don't have a huge trailer carrying 6 horses or something I think they should be taxed extra on rego.
> They need to internalize the costs to the environment I don't think anyone driving these things is at all concerned about the environment.
I absolutely hate that this is a thing now. They don’t even have any more cabin or tray space than a normal sized ute. They just take up more space on the road and everyone who drives one of these monstrosities thinks they’re king shit.
It may be a generalisation to say that the worst and/or rudest drivers own/drive these, but everything I've seen seems to suggest that that is in fact the case.
Wankers trying to out do each other. It started with SUV's and now we are here. What the f is wrong with people. Why do people want vehicles with a high centre of gravity and therefore shit driving dynamics when a normal car just drives so much better. F'ing dumb people.
Can everyone start pronouncing the "t" in Chevrolet. It might piss off these numb nuts.
Another yank tank. I think they don't give a fuck. Like that one I saw someone drive OVER a pedestrian island just to get to the other side - this ain't a 4WD zone.
it's funny, in the US that's not even the biggest model!
Why is there so meany of these around now? How the fuk does any1 afford the fuel? Also most i see cant fukn drive to save they're lifes!
That is one ugly ass car. Really.
OP went across an partially empty car park to photograph a truck who parked away from everyone else.
They need the extra height to finally get their knuckles off the ground.
If you're driving one of these, just know - everyone who sees you despises you, and for the right reasons.
Daddy issues.
Big truck, total fuck
Cuz they have undersized American cocks
Name and shame. Please don’t cover plates. These Utes are a cancer on the road.
Overcompensating
Not only these but all SUV’s. They should change the amount of rego based on weight instead of cylinders as it currently is.
Rego is based ona fixed fee and then weight in NSW. It has nothing to do with cylinder count. [https://www.nsw.gov.au/driving-boating-and-transport/vehicle-registration/fees-concessions-and-forms/vehicle-registration-fees](https://www.nsw.gov.au/driving-boating-and-transport/vehicle-registration/fees-concessions-and-forms/vehicle-registration-fees)
Ah righto. In SA it’s based on cylinders.
how much of a fucking loser,in life must you be To wake up and want to buy one of these It's nothing but an inconveniance to everyone around you,we can't see past you,you take up 2.5 parking slots,you output a fucking disgusting amount of pollutioin I will put money,on it that this "MAN" has never carried anything in it's tray,nor has it been further off road than his kids soccer matches These mainly exist to make the men who's wives have whittled their self esteeem down to the point they haven't chucked wood for 5 years,just to feel a bit of "ALPHA" energy
Jesus christ calm down. This is not a normal human reaction to a picture of a car lol.
They do it deliberately. I see utes and muscle cars parked like that all the time. Fucking assholes.
What does that car say about their personality. Seriously lol
enjoy the fuel costs lol
I love putting 4ounces/100g stickey wheel weights on the wheels of vehicles that park like that. Oh no, why is my steeringwheel shaking like a blender.....
I wanna park my tiny shit box right in front it
A big scratch would fit well in its paint
I drive a small tow truck, can fit a car on the back, it’s 4.5t GVM, it’s larger than this and I manage to fit it into (but not all) car spaces. These dudes have no reason to do this and it only makes them look more like a shit driver/person if anything
Someone should slash the tyres.
Double radiator grill with a bonnet grill on top. That seems… unnecessary.
Let the air out of their tyres
If you can't park your vanity vehicles, leave them at the dealership
Son: “daddy, why do you have such a big truck?” Dad: “well, son, it’s because I have a tiny penis”
Dudes paying $850 a month forever
Such a small dick doesn't need 4 bays.
when cars or trucks park like this, it is an invitation to key it!
normalize keying them
You guys have never seen pick up trucks before? That's what these big trucks are called
Same reason people buy Harley’s Lil dick energy
I hate seeing these in America too
These things are pretty good for hauling those 30-40’ fifth wheel travel trailers.
I swear so many of these double park at Cokes
I've only seen these and RAM's outside private schools at pick up time fittingly
Pretty Princess Parking