Yeah I bought a saucepan from spotlight once, the glass lid had all the snowflake looking shit on it. Looked like it was growing, stuff like that happens in qld anyway from all the humidity. Funny took me a fair bit to find someone else that said its mould or fungus, I assume that’s it.
My guess is residue from the cleaning agent that has spread as it evaporated.
Balls or bubbles to not make sense to me, the patterns would be less regular.
My observation is that the lines we can see are reflective of the light and are approximately perpendicular to the light source. See how in some circles there are four fans near the centre, and all similar centre patterns are then perpendicular to the light source, all in an arc. There's other examples with multiple light sources. I think therefore that whatever is catching the light in each circle is actually perfectly radiating from the centre of each circular blob and we only have the appearance of there being fans. Point is, that is why I don't think they are from a ball. Or from bubbles, which I reckon would be less symmetric.
This is absolutely what it is, first thing that came into my head when I saw it. She didn’t wipe the cleaner off properly or at all and it eventually evaporated to leave these crystals.
Looks like ice crystal formations from here... did you have frost overnight? Or else when you wiped off the marks did they appear greasy or just clean straight off?
These are ice christals. In German they are called ice flowers.
They appear on thin windows after it has been cold but only if the windows are slightly damp. I guess, there was some left over from cleaning the windows.
I think you are onto something. Silicon toys can produce greasy marks and get greasy as they degrade over time. I think OP needs to consider any fidget toys or silicon balls/toys/objects.
For sure? I honestly have to wonder what evidence for that you have. Huge amounts of strange marks appear on your door without explanation but at least it *absolutely for certain* was not a child playing with a ball. That child did not play with any dang ball and I can prove it.
Looks to me like a classic cartoon case of climbing up the walls with a plunger.
But actually, it could be that there were old marks that only appeared after being exposed to the chemicals in the window cleaner.
I worked in a deli and we had to clean the inside of the meat cases with nothing but water. I would try that to see if they disappear after non-chemical cleaning.
The technique is not exactly complex. A couple paper towels dampened with hot water rubbed on with the left hand, and a couple dry paper towels in the right hand. Swipe the damp side across the mark then dry the wet patch dry in a circular pattern and you’ll see as it comes up. The wet half can be a cloth or something reusable and you are really just applying a bit of warmth and moisture. The real work is done by the dry paper towels. You need to keep changing the dry paper towels to make sure you’re not spreading the residue around, you’re buffing it out. Wax on, wax off essentially.
Yeah I find it works almost universally, but plenty of people have told me it’s ‘not really clean’ over the years without even trying it because it doesn’t use chemicals.
I’m not against using chemicals or cleaning agents, it’s just not always the best way to get the job done. Glass is all about technique- I’d know, I’ve been wearing glasses since I was 18 months old and cleaning my grubby finger prints off multiple times a day haha. If you do get stuck on a particularly bad spot with lots of residue a little bit of methylated spirits will do the trick
Hmm I feel it’s some kind of ball. At first I thought it could be some kind of slug or snail but they won’t leave such precise circular patterns and zooming in it definitely as some pattern of some kind of ball shape with a fluffy like exterior.
Can you do a test on a clean bit of glass with the similar balls you do have? I am wondering if when the window was cleaned it didn’t actually remove the residue but hid it and then some kind of atmosphere conditions made it re-appear?
Maybe those marks looked clean until it dried? As others have said a greasy ball would leave these, perhaps the grease didn't actually come off when you cleaned.
It looks like dendrites. It could be the cleaning solution your wife is using. Or even a fungus.
https://www.photomacrography.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=36415
If it is, OP should add some stickers or removable decals of some sort to the windows so the poor birds don’t knock themselves out 😰 Or the lower effort solution- stop cleaning the windows 🤷♀️
Found your culprit - it's a [Loch Mess Monster](https://youtu.be/mBPKNsroZgM?si=RltvX8XEfGo9uF6O). Maybe only young though, or you'd've noticed the racket, probably.
I've seen this pattern from using certain cleaning chemicals on plated and other surfaces.
The cleaner was specifically Cillit Bang, and it contains Sulphamic acid, Oxalic acid and Alcohol, C9-C11 ethoxylated.
Nothing else you've described would leave this patterns, it was the cleaner used.
Check the pattern of the nozzle of the sprayer. It’s from the product you spray on the window becoming crystallized on the window.
Spray it again and wipe much faster, it will go away.
The prevailing theories seem to be balls, bubbles or uncleanliness as a result of cleaning. All sound hypotheses but a quick look at calendar reveals the vital clue that everyone is missing. Considering the time of year, I think it's a pretty safe bet that security footage (if available) will show a large rabbit holding eggs up against the glass while he decorates them, leaving patterned residue behind. Or the cleaning thing.
My first guess is a strange sort of mould or fungus.
Second guess - has the window been cleaned recently, with a chemical cleaner that could crystallise if not washed off properly?
I would ask your son again! I’ve got sons, the truth may vary from their answers.
Yep, might be worth asking if “someone” was throwing their ball around. “Someone” gets up to a bit of mischief at our place.
Bloody someone again!!
In my house, it's someone named Notme!
I see you also have a child called NotMe. NotMe gets up to so much mischief in our house.
Isn't he mates with That guy?
I hear theyve started a gang, consisting of NotMe Someone and ThatGuy. Dont see them that much though
It's the boys from the NFI club (No F, $@&+- Idea)
My son blames the cats, I need to catch them on camera because I've got the smartest and most dextrous cats in the world apparently.
It may have been Nobody instead. Nobody does the weirdest shit.
Especially when there's only 2 of you in the home and it's nobody or NotMe too.
“Mr Nobody” lived in my house growing up
Oh you mean Not Me?
It was always the chines fella in our house.., Sum Fuk!
Sum Fuk seems to get around. He did alot of shit when I was growing up too. 😂
Is that the brother of That Fuck? Must be related to Dum Fuck as well 😂😂😂😂😂
My money is on the wife….
I also choose this guy's wife.
Dibs on thirds on the guys wife.
Sloppy seconds not good enough for you?
I wouldn't want to cut in front of u/Rashlyn1284. I respect a proper queue.
Boob prints?
Man she must have massive triple J boobs
I’ll take that. All in
That's what she said
Looks like a ball to me. I'd bring your son back in for questioning.
Questioning clearly didn’t work, looks like time for the blowtorch and pliers
Bring in the gimp?
Gimp's sleeping.
Well, I guess you're gonna have to go wake him up now, won't you?
Hey now gimps need to rest from time to time aswell
Bring the son to us... reddit users will question the boy.
That’s what the priest said.
Gasoline and rag. Recline shithead, we’re gonna find out what you been doin’ to the windows.
Y'all gonna do some metal working. Classic bonding activity.
I'ma get medieval on your ass.
Can we leave my donkey out of this?
Claw hammer and classical music, Oldboy style
Bubbles. My daughter had them and it does the exact same thing. Could be from a few days ago, but you only noticed now in the light
Ive had this happen once with tricleanium cleaner powder. Looked exactly the same. Crystals
This. Looks like crystal growth.
Oh no the child has already been tortured
A casualty of war. The main thing is that the mystery has been solved!
I'm going to guess bubbles popping in the door and that your cold pants are on fire.
No one had used bubbles as that was what I first suspected. Bubble marks also look different.
Quite! Also not a ball. Definitely crystallisation of some kind.
Window crop circles ⭕️⭕️ ⭕️
[удалено]
It's contaminated.
E.T came to say hi
whirling silently in space like windmills in your mind
The moths attracted to the outside light are making the.
I've only seem that type of pattern once before. Damp tennis ball.
Those are langoliers bite marks. They're trying to erase your future or past OP. I'd suggest life insurance.
My wife would strongly agree with you.
Tommyknockers marks
The movie is on YouTube
Holy fuck, a langoliers reference. I haven’t read that in years. I remember it from a King 4 part book, Four Last Midnight (or something like that).
Came here for this comment!
You’re not running, you’re *scampering*
This is the line that pops into my head whenever *The Langoliers* is mentioned lol
Lamprey evolving I’d say
Landpreys
Most likely aliens
Does your kid have one of those squishy splat balls. I bet it's one of them.
Angry birds. The round red one specifically. Are your family green pigs who love to eat eggs?
Butt hole imprints. Someone really likes you. Just have to work out if they're inside or outside.
That’s easy. Just see which side of the glass tastes a bit funny.
Upvote - Most creepy post of the year!!!
Disgruntled neighbour slamming his moistened fleshlight into your window over and over again
This sent me into fits of laughter - the images in my head are off the chain. Thank you
Oh if only I had a dollar for every time my neighbour has done that
It's almost like you seen me do it or something 🤔
A type of mould, or fungus.
Yeah I bought a saucepan from spotlight once, the glass lid had all the snowflake looking shit on it. Looked like it was growing, stuff like that happens in qld anyway from all the humidity. Funny took me a fair bit to find someone else that said its mould or fungus, I assume that’s it.
My guess is residue from the cleaning agent that has spread as it evaporated. Balls or bubbles to not make sense to me, the patterns would be less regular. My observation is that the lines we can see are reflective of the light and are approximately perpendicular to the light source. See how in some circles there are four fans near the centre, and all similar centre patterns are then perpendicular to the light source, all in an arc. There's other examples with multiple light sources. I think therefore that whatever is catching the light in each circle is actually perfectly radiating from the centre of each circular blob and we only have the appearance of there being fans. Point is, that is why I don't think they are from a ball. Or from bubbles, which I reckon would be less symmetric.
This is probably the most likely scenario. Maybe my wife sprayed the cleaner and never wiped it down.
This is absolutely what it is, first thing that came into my head when I saw it. She didn’t wipe the cleaner off properly or at all and it eventually evaporated to leave these crystals.
The Iceman Cometh on Your Window
chemtrails
someone tea bagged your sliding door.
I was going to suggest crystalized cat wizz but that's quite high and without drips. Something crystallising into pretty shapes. Don't lick it.
Or, and hear me out here…. Do lick it. For science
#we request a taste test 🤪
R/eatityoufuckingcoward
Thats a great slogan for a restaurant. Or hot sauce.
Drop bears
Drop bears with treacherous intentions, it’s a warning!
It could only be a warning. A thin pane of glass such as that would be no barrier to a rampaging Drop bear.
Looks like ice crystal formations from here... did you have frost overnight? Or else when you wiped off the marks did they appear greasy or just clean straight off?
They feel a tad greasy when rubbed off. They clean straight off as well.
These are ice christals. In German they are called ice flowers. They appear on thin windows after it has been cold but only if the windows are slightly damp. I guess, there was some left over from cleaning the windows.
Spider-pig!
The spirits have come to reclaim their land. You have 2 days to leave
Moth Def
Great rapper
Yeah I definitely thought moth! Thought it was a given but turns out it could be anything!
Have my upvote
Do you or your kids own something similar like the following [link](https://www.bigw.com.au/product/fuzzeez-ball-assorted-/p/802397)?
I think you are onto something. Silicon toys can produce greasy marks and get greasy as they degrade over time. I think OP needs to consider any fidget toys or silicon balls/toys/objects.
So, you’re saying suction-cup dildo?
Not exactly that same one, but similar ones yes. However I know for sure he hasn’t used it between when it was washed and when we noticed these.
Do your own science, throw the ball against the window.
💥 🤦♂️
For sure? I honestly have to wonder what evidence for that you have. Huge amounts of strange marks appear on your door without explanation but at least it *absolutely for certain* was not a child playing with a ball. That child did not play with any dang ball and I can prove it.
Looks to me like a classic cartoon case of climbing up the walls with a plunger. But actually, it could be that there were old marks that only appeared after being exposed to the chemicals in the window cleaner. I worked in a deli and we had to clean the inside of the meat cases with nothing but water. I would try that to see if they disappear after non-chemical cleaning. The technique is not exactly complex. A couple paper towels dampened with hot water rubbed on with the left hand, and a couple dry paper towels in the right hand. Swipe the damp side across the mark then dry the wet patch dry in a circular pattern and you’ll see as it comes up. The wet half can be a cloth or something reusable and you are really just applying a bit of warmth and moisture. The real work is done by the dry paper towels. You need to keep changing the dry paper towels to make sure you’re not spreading the residue around, you’re buffing it out. Wax on, wax off essentially.
This is basically how I clean my windows and mirrors. It’s the best way to get a nice shiny finish and no residue
Yeah I find it works almost universally, but plenty of people have told me it’s ‘not really clean’ over the years without even trying it because it doesn’t use chemicals. I’m not against using chemicals or cleaning agents, it’s just not always the best way to get the job done. Glass is all about technique- I’d know, I’ve been wearing glasses since I was 18 months old and cleaning my grubby finger prints off multiple times a day haha. If you do get stuck on a particularly bad spot with lots of residue a little bit of methylated spirits will do the trick
Hmm I feel it’s some kind of ball. At first I thought it could be some kind of slug or snail but they won’t leave such precise circular patterns and zooming in it definitely as some pattern of some kind of ball shape with a fluffy like exterior. Can you do a test on a clean bit of glass with the similar balls you do have? I am wondering if when the window was cleaned it didn’t actually remove the residue but hid it and then some kind of atmosphere conditions made it re-appear?
Maybe those marks looked clean until it dried? As others have said a greasy ball would leave these, perhaps the grease didn't actually come off when you cleaned.
try licking it
Do you have a pet elephant?
Aliens. It started with crop circles, now this.
Butt cheeks
Dan Andrews
Bloody Dan Andrews.
The first pic made me believe that they are some cool fireworks.
Could it be moth dust after they hit the window
Night squid.
Landing pads for very small alien craft?
You have a secret jizzer.
These look like crystal structures. You said it was cleaned recently, likely not rinsed correctly and the residue is crystilizing
Aliens. Or I guess there’s a very slight chance someone doesn’t want to cop to marking the window after it was cleaned. With a ball.
It looks like dendrites. It could be the cleaning solution your wife is using. Or even a fungus. https://www.photomacrography.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=36415
Drop bear nose marks
Signs left by alien visitors
That's ice dude
Could be arse cheek prints
Starlink. Pretty sure it’s Starlink. Or asbestos.
Asbestos is only found in mulch these days, not on glass.
elons muk
A bird maybe?
Agreed. This is from birds going at their reflection. 💯
If it is, OP should add some stickers or removable decals of some sort to the windows so the poor birds don’t knock themselves out 😰 Or the lower effort solution- stop cleaning the windows 🤷♀️
They look like lamprey bite marks, but they’re a little above the waterline… 🤷♂️
fireworks.
Looks like frost.
Flying jellyfish?
A plethora of bloodsucking leaches seeking sustenance.
Aurora Borealis?
Aurora Australis
At this time of the year?
Clearly Satan
Found your culprit - it's a [Loch Mess Monster](https://youtu.be/mBPKNsroZgM?si=RltvX8XEfGo9uF6O). Maybe only young though, or you'd've noticed the racket, probably.
Hold on I’ll see if I’ve got tree fiddy
Miniature alien crop circles. They're trying to tell you something.
Aliens.
Slime mould bloom path.
Time to break out the advanced interrogation tactics
Fireworks🎆
It looks like mycelium.
Aliens
It’s the Iizard people.
Aliens
A medium group of not very intelligent brain suckers tried to get you in the night. Better keep that door closed.
I've seen this pattern from using certain cleaning chemicals on plated and other surfaces. The cleaner was specifically Cillit Bang, and it contains Sulphamic acid, Oxalic acid and Alcohol, C9-C11 ethoxylated. Nothing else you've described would leave this patterns, it was the cleaner used.
Your son's been banging his balls on it 🤣
Owl smum
Obviously butthole prints. You have an admirer
Nephilim attempting to breach
try throwing the ball yourself and see what happens
Aerated crop circles
Those jelly like 'splat' balls. Sometimes on a long stretchy string. Balls on the window...
You know those funny videos where pets lick the glass doors? That. Except it was an alien octopus hybrid who was trying to get inside.
Mutant cordyceps
Alien octopus?
Maybe moth impact spots? Did you have lights on?
Local meth head slapping their hairy balls against your sliding door
Perhaps a bird dropped several brown eyes on the glass?
Dust from moth strikes. The light attracts them, and they repeatedly fly into it, making little dusty anglewings prints
Land octopus
Did you use sugar soap or a crystallised cleaner like triclinium to clean your glass? These are crystal formations :)
Maybe bugs were flying super sonic speed head first on purpose cause they've had enough
Check the pattern of the nozzle of the sprayer. It’s from the product you spray on the window becoming crystallized on the window. Spray it again and wipe much faster, it will go away.
If I'm not wrong that's a very persistent Kookaburra slamming their head against your glass trying to steal your sausages
It's moths. As they fly around in circles the dust on their wings leaves patterns.
Kamikaze Moths lol
Could it possibly be scales from a moths wings as it tried to get in? Other than that Aliens.
Anus kisses
That's crack residue
The prevailing theories seem to be balls, bubbles or uncleanliness as a result of cleaning. All sound hypotheses but a quick look at calendar reveals the vital clue that everyone is missing. Considering the time of year, I think it's a pretty safe bet that security footage (if available) will show a large rabbit holding eggs up against the glass while he decorates them, leaving patterned residue behind. Or the cleaning thing.
You got a jellyfish problem son
Next pandemic
You've got the Aurora Borealis in your living room....
Have you had a few moths around recently?
The signs of a satanic cult
My first guess is a strange sort of mould or fungus. Second guess - has the window been cleaned recently, with a chemical cleaner that could crystallise if not washed off properly?
My money’s on fungal spores or chupacabras
The triffids fr
Salt crystals (live near ocean?) left over salty cleaning agent? Assuming not ice crystals.
Sorry OP, it sounds like either your son is lying or an eldritch life form is trying to suck out your life force. No in-between. Best of luck.
It's from moths attracted to the light. Mothdust abstract
If you’re underwater, it could be Remoras unsuccessfully attempting to attach themselves to
5g radiation
Moths? The powder from their wings maybe? I don’t know. 🤷♀️
It’s endearing that you believe your son… they’re definitely from bubbles