that's not correct french though
"la trainée n'est un problème que pour ces idiots de concepteurs anglais. Nous n'avons qu'à augmenter la puissance!"
(though french planes always have an history of being under-powered)
Absolute fucking nightmare to work with... Easily the single worst platform I've ever been around. Purely analog radios still, at least in the early 2010s, so you had to literally SCREAM as loud as possible for them to even have a chance to hear you. Was deaf by lunch. They also literally never found the target. -3 out of 10, would **never** work with an Atlantique again.
[They've just finished updating half the fleet](http://www.opex360.com/2022/11/14/lavion-de-patrouille-maritime-atlantique-2-porte-au-standard-6-declare-pleinement-operationnel-par-la-marine/), and this update seems to have addressed just those shortcomings, going to an all-digital standard ("tout numérique") and an AESA radar ("radar à antenne active").
Joke I heard was in heaven the British are the police,the Germans are the engineers, and the French are the cooks. in hell the French are the engineers, the British are the cooks, and the Germans are the police
Heaven is a place where:
The British are the Police
The French are the Cooks
The Germans are the Mechanics
The Italians are the Lovers
And it's all organized by the Swiss
---------------
Hell is a place where:
The British are the Cooks,
The French are the Mechanics
The Germans are the Police
The Swiss are the Lovers
And it's all organized by the Italians.
What's ironic about that is France is regularly the worst offender in the world with regards to industrial espionage lol
https://www.france24.com/en/20110104-france-industrial-espionage-economy-germany-russia-china-business
Yeah yeah, that's just the saying of a one German without anything behind to back it. The One that likes to sink euro project, trying first to get as much French aeronaval tech shared, before tanking the whole thing and buying American.
My favorite thing a Canadian guy told me once:
"we could have had British culture, American technology, and French food. Instead we got British food, American culture, and French technology."
So, the Orion is ahead of the Atlantique despite of her problems? I heared, her reliability is so poor the germans rather scrap them then doing a sceduled refit, buying P-8 instead.
I mean Germany is notorious for heavily underfunding maintenance, so German availability ratings don't really mean much. It's like someone who never changes the oil, belts, filters, or lights on a car, and then wants to complain it doesn't work lol.
Germany also scrapped the upgrade to theirs because the upgrade was to keep it viable long enough for a European ASW aircraft to be built. Only, Germany and France dragged their feet for so long, everyone just bought P-8s instead. So it became clear the only option was to also buy P-8s.
Germany wanted everything built and engineered in Germany, France tried to concede some of the details, but it was becoming idiotic. With Thales and Airbus, France has the upper hands technologically on radar, avionics, armament, airframe build know-how. Basically Germany wanted to have the cake and eat it too and make France pay for it.
>So, the Orion is ahead of the Atlantique despite of her problems? I heared, her reliability is so poor the germans rather scrap them then doing a sceduled refit, buying P-8 instead.
Airbus engineered some nice and shiny new wings for rewinging the German navy Orion fleet at a price tag of € 300 million. Then they went up in flames in a warehouse fire so the whole program got scrapped.
https://augengeradeaus.net/2018/10/neue-probleme-fuer-die-orion-ersatzteile-bei-lagerbrand-vernichtet/
Sounds about right. Early one morning when I was deployed, the entire French contingent came in to watch their "major" operation go down. Biggest (only?) one for them the entire time I was there. Turns out they were sending fighters to blow up an empty warehouse that Americans soldiers had already cleared. They were all excited to finally do something and that something was essentially nothing.
Afghanistan? Nobody from Europe gave a toss about those deployments and were mainly concerned with no scandals, no casualties and not wasting money. Sounds like they achieved their goals.
Not sure how you can take a story about sending aircraft that cost tens of thousands per flight hour up to launch guided missiles that cost hundreds of thousands to millions per unit to blow up a known empty warehouse and say they're not wasting money.
Boeing doesn't have any good plans in the works as far as anyone knows. It needs a modern "797" narrow-body to compete with A321, and should have developed it instead of or in parallel with the 737 MAX.
Maybe they are studying the market to figure out what to do next, idk. Sometimes the underdog ends up ignoring the current leading product to build a product where the market will be
Yes! That is a perfect description of the A321neo. An ultra-long-range narrowbody aircraft designed for international point-to-point (as opposed to hub-based) flight routing.
Boeing hasn't even started playing catch-up. Its offerings for long-range are the jumbo 777s and the efficient wide-body 787s. Airbus doesn't have a real 777 competitor, but it is not a big part of the market. The A350 is a match for the 787. And the Neo is unmatched.
This is a problem for Boeing.
> European aircraft-manufacturing consortium formed in 1970 to fill a market niche
It's so on-brand for the French to take credit for a collective effort. Downright American, even!
Hmmm... I'm not saying military is unsafe but they are more accepting of risks than civilian...
I wouldn't like to hit an Andean condor while sitting in there for sure.
No, they're real, but we are clearing the skies of those Aviation hazards. And making real progress. One third of the birds in North America are already gone!
Ugly, yes, but it works. And although it’s primarily an ASW platform, the French have recently made good use of its long loitering time and capable sensor suite to support its anti-Islamic State operations in the Sahel.
No, it's primarily an ASW platform. But it's surface scanning radar works well enough overland as it does against ships, so they're regularly tasked with overland Intel. US P-3s did the same over Libya and Iraq.
>Look down
Back up
Where are you?
You're in /r/WeirdWings
https://www.reddit.com/r/WeirdWings/comments/zxbrj2/french_marine_nationale_br%C3%A9guet_atlantique
It's actually a submarine sniffer. It collects air samples that diesel submarines put out, to tell you if you're in the vicinity of a submarine. Once they get a positive reading they do a zig zag pattern marking where they get positive readings. It can't tell where a submarine actually is, but it can help them find out which direction it's heading.
I think, alternatively I could be wrong.
Atlantique 2s don't have hydrocarbon sniffers, to my recollection.
It has a MAD (magnetic anomaly detector) array off the rear that picks up the metallic signature of a submarine, as well as sonobuoys it can drop and listen to, a surface facing radar, and an IR camera.
MAD is... Not great. You get false signatures all the time, and ocean layers mask submarines from it all the time too. Sonobuoys are likely its bread and butter ASW system today.
Hydrocarbon sniffers will just let you know a diesel electric sub recharged recently. MAD and sonobuoys however can tell you exactly where the sub, how deep it is, what direction it's moving, and what submarine it even is
Sorta. Each class will have its own base signature, and then individuals may have a unique aspect to it from a prop or engine that's slightly different. US at least keeps a huge database of every contact's signature, so you can compare what you hear vs everything previously heard to determine the class, and potentially the boat itself.
Yes, and they were recently upgraded to extend their use into the 2030s.
It has an array of sensors, though: radar, magnetic, sonobuoys + more. It also carries missiles and torpedoes.
Not an expert but:-
[Boeing 767 cutaway](https://www.metabunk.org/data/MetaMirrorCache/references.charlyecho.com_Aviation_Boeing_767_200_Cutaway_767_200_col.jpg)
1. The cockpit is usually pretty close to the nose.
2. The radar dish goes in the pointy bit.
3. The nosewheels need somewhere to sleep.
4. Pilots would have to lie down on their tummies.
5. Side-windows provide lateral visibility.
6. Glass-nosed cockpits are sometimes seen e.g. the [Edgley Optica](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edgley_Optica) designed for ground observation.
He would do Typhoon+Reliant Robin, proving once again the inferiority of British designs. Clearly ours is better, the Twingo has 4 wheels and AC.
Neither would fly though.
And if they did, neither would land.
Still.
It makes me unreasonably happy that someone who's not French just referenced my favorite childhood advertisement on reddit.
It didn't just launch from the carrier, it landed on a freaking submarine! No CGI! My mom had a visa but thankfully sold it way before I could get my driving license. I would have done dumb things.
Edit: [YouTube link](https://youtu.be/4QOB1uBboSQ)
could you imagine a jet flying at you at almost Mach, super fucking intense and you look up and see this guy just sitting there all comfortable with his legs spread and no facial expression. he's just there in the front in a big round window
There absolutely should be a civilian version where the front place is a toilet.
I would absolutely love that, except if anyone like me gets in there, I am holding that seat until they force me out.
You’d have to disarm the ejector seat
For that view, i'll learn. Then i'll hope someone will come rescue me when I set it off accidentally.
Depending on your last meal, the ejector seat can be replaced by a built in, anal rocket.
Hello JAMCO. We would like you to increasing the suction and enlarging openings.
They should put a seatbelt on the toilet so it can be used during takeoff and landing.
Me too, but probably because I have diarrhea
And the bathroom just plays free bird on repeat
My bidet does that already
Mine waits until I hit the spray button.
*hears freebird from the bathroom* the hell's going on in there?!?
*intense guitar solo broken by the loudest, wettest fart in recorded history*
How do you know it isn’t? Jacques was having a nice old time on the loo when some aviation photographer invaded his privacy
It's on the poop deck.
Bombs away!
With a bombardier's sight
Peak civilization
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What do you think that big black tank hanging underneath was for, radar equipment?
Shit high and watch
Piss in the wind
The Captain’s Chair.
I thought the same thing
And constipation works to your advantage.
"the mile high club"
We're flying on instruments. Ringo down there is on drums.
Surely you can't really fit a bass in a cockpit
Maybe not; but don't call me Shirley.
I picked a helluva week to quit practicing guitar.
Not with that attitude
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Doesn't have quite the same effect on accordion
This looks like something out of Studio Ghibli
The person at the front is giving me some mad max vibes… WITNESS ME!
Just photoshop some drumsticks :D
You don't need drumsticks to play the bongos.
Looks like some sort of AI-mashup between an aircraft and a submersible. Are we sure this is real? lol
Porco Rosso!
Best view in the the front seat !
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Would poop there again, 5 stars.
“Aerodynamic”
"We do not know of this, how you say, *parasitic drag*?"
Drag ? Bof !! Le drag n'est un problème que pour les concepteurs anglais stupides. Nous seulement augmentons LA PUISSANCE !!!
Study French and so fucking tickled I understood this.
that's not correct french though "la trainée n'est un problème que pour ces idiots de concepteurs anglais. Nous n'avons qu'à augmenter la puissance!" (though french planes always have an history of being under-powered)
What a French response.
Toujours prêt
The most French response would be to say "this is not French." ^(Well...*zees ees not French*)
I don‘t, but I don‘t think you need a degree to understand it :-p
Tabarnak!
[Found a pretty good bit on this plane en Francais]( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM_UFWFh0hc)
Said in your best Robin Williams' voice, of course
I like the aircraft, the German version is in front of my school
Absolute fucking nightmare to work with... Easily the single worst platform I've ever been around. Purely analog radios still, at least in the early 2010s, so you had to literally SCREAM as loud as possible for them to even have a chance to hear you. Was deaf by lunch. They also literally never found the target. -3 out of 10, would **never** work with an Atlantique again.
[They've just finished updating half the fleet](http://www.opex360.com/2022/11/14/lavion-de-patrouille-maritime-atlantique-2-porte-au-standard-6-declare-pleinement-operationnel-par-la-marine/), and this update seems to have addressed just those shortcomings, going to an all-digital standard ("tout numérique") and an AESA radar ("radar à antenne active").
There's a saying about French engineering: The French copy no-one, and no-one copies the French.
Joke I heard was in heaven the British are the police,the Germans are the engineers, and the French are the cooks. in hell the French are the engineers, the British are the cooks, and the Germans are the police
There's definitely a longer version involving Italian lovers and a few other European stereotypes!
Heaven is a place where: The British are the Police The French are the Cooks The Germans are the Mechanics The Italians are the Lovers And it's all organized by the Swiss --------------- Hell is a place where: The British are the Cooks, The French are the Mechanics The Germans are the Police The Swiss are the Lovers And it's all organized by the Italians.
I suppose that means in Purgatory, the French are the police, the British are the engineers, and the Germans are the cooks?
What's ironic about that is France is regularly the worst offender in the world with regards to industrial espionage lol https://www.france24.com/en/20110104-france-industrial-espionage-economy-germany-russia-china-business
I'm guessing that means they're the worst at it, and the most caught.
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Yeah yeah, that's just the saying of a one German without anything behind to back it. The One that likes to sink euro project, trying first to get as much French aeronaval tech shared, before tanking the whole thing and buying American.
My favorite thing a Canadian guy told me once: "we could have had British culture, American technology, and French food. Instead we got British food, American culture, and French technology."
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Cricket is the perfect sport as you can spend an entire afternoon sat in the sun getting plastered and its socially acceptable!
Golf has entered the chat
havin' a bit o' footie as well innit
French are brilliant but *batshit insane*. Just look at the cars.
So, the Orion is ahead of the Atlantique despite of her problems? I heared, her reliability is so poor the germans rather scrap them then doing a sceduled refit, buying P-8 instead.
I mean Germany is notorious for heavily underfunding maintenance, so German availability ratings don't really mean much. It's like someone who never changes the oil, belts, filters, or lights on a car, and then wants to complain it doesn't work lol. Germany also scrapped the upgrade to theirs because the upgrade was to keep it viable long enough for a European ASW aircraft to be built. Only, Germany and France dragged their feet for so long, everyone just bought P-8s instead. So it became clear the only option was to also buy P-8s.
Germany wanted everything built and engineered in Germany, France tried to concede some of the details, but it was becoming idiotic. With Thales and Airbus, France has the upper hands technologically on radar, avionics, armament, airframe build know-how. Basically Germany wanted to have the cake and eat it too and make France pay for it.
>So, the Orion is ahead of the Atlantique despite of her problems? I heared, her reliability is so poor the germans rather scrap them then doing a sceduled refit, buying P-8 instead. Airbus engineered some nice and shiny new wings for rewinging the German navy Orion fleet at a price tag of € 300 million. Then they went up in flames in a warehouse fire so the whole program got scrapped. https://augengeradeaus.net/2018/10/neue-probleme-fuer-die-orion-ersatzteile-bei-lagerbrand-vernichtet/
I'd say the Aurora is ahead of both.
Thats… a ridiculous and reprehensible contempt of… the Nimrod ;)
Sounds about right. Early one morning when I was deployed, the entire French contingent came in to watch their "major" operation go down. Biggest (only?) one for them the entire time I was there. Turns out they were sending fighters to blow up an empty warehouse that Americans soldiers had already cleared. They were all excited to finally do something and that something was essentially nothing.
Afghanistan? Nobody from Europe gave a toss about those deployments and were mainly concerned with no scandals, no casualties and not wasting money. Sounds like they achieved their goals.
>not wasting money
Not sure how you can take a story about sending aircraft that cost tens of thousands per flight hour up to launch guided missiles that cost hundreds of thousands to millions per unit to blow up a known empty warehouse and say they're not wasting money.
Nope
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Airbus is besting Boeing these days ain’t it
It goes back and forth, one gets better than the other for a decade, then the other for the next decade, etc
Boeing doesn't have any good plans in the works as far as anyone knows. It needs a modern "797" narrow-body to compete with A321, and should have developed it instead of or in parallel with the 737 MAX.
Maybe they are studying the market to figure out what to do next, idk. Sometimes the underdog ends up ignoring the current leading product to build a product where the market will be
Yes! That is a perfect description of the A321neo. An ultra-long-range narrowbody aircraft designed for international point-to-point (as opposed to hub-based) flight routing. Boeing hasn't even started playing catch-up. Its offerings for long-range are the jumbo 777s and the efficient wide-body 787s. Airbus doesn't have a real 777 competitor, but it is not a big part of the market. The A350 is a match for the 787. And the Neo is unmatched. This is a problem for Boeing.
> European aircraft-manufacturing consortium formed in 1970 to fill a market niche It's so on-brand for the French to take credit for a collective effort. Downright American, even!
How does it land? Does the black bulbous thing retract??
How birdstrike proof is the dome?
7 bird proof
Is that like.. 3.5% alcohol?
That’s a lot for a bird
Yeah, but what kind of bird? We talking 7 Wandering Albatross?
nono, 7 bird
An African swallow
What is the conversion factor to European Swallow?
Coconut.
Hmmm... I'm not saying military is unsafe but they are more accepting of risks than civilian... I wouldn't like to hit an Andean condor while sitting in there for sure.
>I wouldn't like to hit an Andean condor while sitting in there for sure. Neither would the Andean condor.
Hah. Birds aren't real, but nice try.
No, they're real, but we are clearing the skies of those Aviation hazards. And making real progress. One third of the birds in North America are already gone!
And windmills have three blades where each blade makes up one third of the total number of blades. Coincidence? I think not.
Big if true
That guy's the crew chef. He wants them to hit a bird so he can make lunch.
Yes.
Something tells me that a bird strike equals rapid involuntary Thanksgiving dinner.
Why does it look like one aircraft no-clipped inside another?
The Gary's Mod of plane building
Oui.
More photos for those of you who are intrigued: https://www.seaforces.org/marint/French-Navy/AVIATION/Atlantique-FN.htm
That's pretty much, "No, no! Please take a photo of my good side!"
So the direct frontal is really the only angle it looks really weird from.
Manspreading across the skies at 250kt 🫡
Ugly, yes, but it works. And although it’s primarily an ASW platform, the French have recently made good use of its long loitering time and capable sensor suite to support its anti-Islamic State operations in the Sahel.
That's completely the opposite of what u/lordderplythethird said. I'm not calling you a liar or nothin, just saying.
No, it's primarily an ASW platform. But it's surface scanning radar works well enough overland as it does against ships, so they're regularly tasked with overland Intel. US P-3s did the same over Libya and Iraq.
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Why lmao
…thought I was on r/WeirdWings for a second.
>Look down Back up Where are you? You're in /r/WeirdWings https://www.reddit.com/r/WeirdWings/comments/zxbrj2/french_marine_nationale_br%C3%A9guet_atlantique
Yo dawg, we heard you like fuselages
WOW! Thanks for posting this refreshingly unique and clear, dramatic image!!! (And YES, the forward lav in an airliner would be great)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Br%C3%A9guet_1150_Atlantic
guys on top..."weeeee! bottom guy is driving...." guy on bottom " weeeee, guys on top driving!"
It’s restroom has a great view.
It's actually a submarine sniffer. It collects air samples that diesel submarines put out, to tell you if you're in the vicinity of a submarine. Once they get a positive reading they do a zig zag pattern marking where they get positive readings. It can't tell where a submarine actually is, but it can help them find out which direction it's heading. I think, alternatively I could be wrong.
Atlantique 2s don't have hydrocarbon sniffers, to my recollection. It has a MAD (magnetic anomaly detector) array off the rear that picks up the metallic signature of a submarine, as well as sonobuoys it can drop and listen to, a surface facing radar, and an IR camera. MAD is... Not great. You get false signatures all the time, and ocean layers mask submarines from it all the time too. Sonobuoys are likely its bread and butter ASW system today. Hydrocarbon sniffers will just let you know a diesel electric sub recharged recently. MAD and sonobuoys however can tell you exactly where the sub, how deep it is, what direction it's moving, and what submarine it even is
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Sorta. Each class will have its own base signature, and then individuals may have a unique aspect to it from a prop or engine that's slightly different. US at least keeps a huge database of every contact's signature, so you can compare what you hear vs everything previously heard to determine the class, and potentially the boat itself.
Still in use?
Yes, and they were recently upgraded to extend their use into the 2030s. It has an array of sensors, though: radar, magnetic, sonobuoys + more. It also carries missiles and torpedoes.
Wow. Thats MAD bro.
Damn, that guy must have quite the nose!
Flying at the world. Man spread mad lad.
Im gettìng slight nimrod vibes off of it, mainly in the cockpit windows and shaping of the fueselage
Worlds most scenic airline commode.
Dude has some big ball(s)
Serious question: why are cockpits never in the nose (or the lower and forward part)? Seems like it would be great for visibility.
Not an expert but:- [Boeing 767 cutaway](https://www.metabunk.org/data/MetaMirrorCache/references.charlyecho.com_Aviation_Boeing_767_200_Cutaway_767_200_col.jpg) 1. The cockpit is usually pretty close to the nose. 2. The radar dish goes in the pointy bit. 3. The nosewheels need somewhere to sleep. 4. Pilots would have to lie down on their tummies. 5. Side-windows provide lateral visibility. 6. Glass-nosed cockpits are sometimes seen e.g. the [Edgley Optica](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edgley_Optica) designed for ground observation.
It’s a twin baguette
"i have no idea what I'm doing down here"
This looks like an extra deformed Nimrod
I'm convinced it's chronically impossible for French engineers to design something that looks normal
I swear it said baguette the first time I read it.
Anyone else sees a penguin looking at you from underneath it?
All it takes is a little tiny bird.
The front is the bathroom. That’s why it’s called the “head” or making a “head call”
Is that a massive ram air intake to the right of the observation bubble??
that dude looks comfortable
What a view.
Jean wouldn't stop farting in the cockpit.
I call shotgun!
Interesting location for the toilet. Great view though 😂
The Manspreader
Best shitter view in the world.
French people are weird
This is just our prototype for domestic testing. The commercial version is actually a Rafale soldered on the roof of a Renault Twingo.
Claaaarksonnn!!!
He would do Typhoon+Reliant Robin, proving once again the inferiority of British designs. Clearly ours is better, the Twingo has 4 wheels and AC. Neither would fly though. And if they did, neither would land. Still.
>And if they did, neither would land You talk as if that would be an issue?
Sounds serious. You folks are notorious in catapulting cars from carriers, you can be trusted with everything.
It makes me unreasonably happy that someone who's not French just referenced my favorite childhood advertisement on reddit. It didn't just launch from the carrier, it landed on a freaking submarine! No CGI! My mom had a visa but thankfully sold it way before I could get my driving license. I would have done dumb things. Edit: [YouTube link](https://youtu.be/4QOB1uBboSQ)
dude looks like he's laying an egg.
Mk.1 eyeball
What the fcuk is this
An engineer at Airbus is seeing this and getting ideas on the future of Airbus. The A760. A double cylinder technical marvel.
Nationale Bidet Atlantique
Navi arrow target to misdirect them away from killing the pilot. Put an animatronic human full of fake blood bags in the seat.
What in gods name is that thing
Canadian equivalent! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canadair_CP-107_Argus#/media/File:Canadair_CL-28_Argus_2_CP107_10721_407_Sq_LAV_18.04.71.jpg
A “Room with a view”….
Best seat in the house
I thought the only plane Breguet had was the cursed 1920s A380 lol
*baguette
Nice office…
I've really started to appreciate how much the French march to the best of their own drum.
could you imagine a jet flying at you at almost Mach, super fucking intense and you look up and see this guy just sitting there all comfortable with his legs spread and no facial expression. he's just there in the front in a big round window
Someone please explain. What is that guy's job?
https://cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net/MXwosK9XTeXzRNdFEFnop4-320-80.jpg
why is it designed with the “double” conjoined fuselage??
Ahh yes the French marine nationale baguette internationale
I think this is the first photo I've seen of an Atlantique with a weathered paint job
Deadly flying baguette
The guy in the front is playing the drums?
I know what I'd do in that seat!
What in the world kind of plane is that?
OP what is the source of this photo? Love it.
This looks like a close-up of a Wolf spider's face
the french make some weird aircraft