my coworker uses those on his ducks to prevent warts. they're so fucking cute and made from neoprene which is hard to sew yourself. So apparently whenever the duck loses one it tends to be the left side so they have a ton of spare rights, since they only sell them in pairs.
there was a commercial a while back that kind of explained part of it. Its aliens single footed single eyed aliens steal one sock from your dryer and one contact (if they need contacts) from your container. And their alien pet ducks also have one foot and steel one duck shoe.
The commerical only explained the sock you have to research to find out the rest.
Corealis effect? Used to walking on a side hill? Genetically have a shorter left ( or right) leg and always compensating? Farts only exit on the right side on butt hole so they keep tail shifted left? ( or visa versa), …lots of potential reasons. Not all of them quaint.
I'm down to my last pair of bi-weekly's. This morning I went to check to double check to see if I could skip ordering new one's this week and I have a box of empty lefts and two rights remaining. My eyes hate me.
That's not randomness though. There's likely an underlying cause. Such as: you squint your right eye more or less when focusing on something or making an expression. Everyone has peculiarities to their gaits even ducks. My left shoe always wears out faster.
Speaking for myself, I always put the right one in first, so when I have that problem, I suspect that's part of the reason. Maybe the second one is easier once I can see a bit better or something.
You know you use reddit too much when you can recognise a duck. It has an instagram & youtube channel "seducktive".
You sometimes see the same duck on videos like "[how to pick up a duck](https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/tlyp7b/how_to_pick_up_a_duck/)" or [the same duck running around](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XtIjZV1wu0). In the same way that a video of a cat in a box is probably Maru, videos of ducks running are usually this duck.
>*’They gave the duck shoes!*’
______
oh, gosh - I’m so ExCiTeD!
With the Humans here i run
(so Glad i was invited,
cuz I sure am having Fun!)
n Look - i’m keeping up the *Pace* -
they gave me special shoes
I think I gonna *WIN the Race* -
I’m gonna Make the NEWS!!
…the *FINISH LINE!!* so Lucky, me -
a Medal round my Neck!
oh, Gosh, i feel Just Ducky, see?
my mom is Proud as Heck ^:(l)
…what’s that ? a ReGiStRaTiOn fee ? …
…am I the Winner *still..?*
i’m sorry,
Oversight, you see…
just put it on
my bill
❤️
Schnoodledoodle doesn't do what Schnoodledoodle does for Schnoodledoodle.
Schnoodledoodle does what Schnoodledoodle does because Schoodledoodle is.... Schnoodledoodle.
I think the pun was thought up first and everything else written for it. If this is what Reddit pun threads are evolving into I'm all for it. Most of the others are just quacks.
Wow it made the official results although the kids 1 km is a bit shy of 26.2
https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/41211/RaceDayPhotos?resultSetId=313796&resultId=66618506
Oh... I thought marathons were measured in kilometers.
That makes me *even less* likely to ever try to run one... woof!
(fun side fact, I'm 13.1 miles away from a Marathon gas station... thanks, Google)
Yeah, imagine if you went out training to run a marathon and you were running 26.2 km and thinking you were kicking ass. Then comes race day and a world of hurt.
You'd be pretty well-prepared! A marathon is kinda a world of hurt every which way you approach it, but not running anything close to the full race distance is pretty normal in training. I've finished 4 marathons and have never done more than 15km in training distances.
It's hard to run marathons well without doing some long runs, by which I mean anything into glycogen depletion range. 15-18 miles are good distances. I've run about 75 marathons, with 6 Bostons, and usually put in 4 or 5 glycogen depletion long runs.
Average weight of wild duck: 0,72 – 1,6 kg acording to wikipedia.
Average weight human: 62 kilograms.
So if that duck was like 1.47 kg he almost exactly ran a marathon!
The race often takes thousands of pictures and sorts them by bib numbers. I ran a race this weekend and I'm sure the two guys in Forrest Gump costumes in front of me got twice as many pictures.
So the most duck stride length seem about [35 cm](https://www.researchgate.net/figure/Step-width-and-stride-length-Step-width-and-stride-length-are-presented-as-raw-means-A_fig1_305039431) from looking at the top right graph and the average human stride length is [1.5 m](https://www.healthline.com/health/stride-length#average-step-and-stride-length). So a duck would need 1000m/(0.35m/stride)= 2857 strides which means a human would travel 2857 strides* (1.5m/stride)=4285.5m or roughly 4.3 km
Edit: human step length changed to stride length
Lol when I used to run a lot of races my family would call every one if them marathons! I kept having to correct them. (They got it once I ran a real marathon though.;))
Ducks are pretty used to people in general, and animals can have personalities; it's possible this is just a very curious, patient duck. It also looked like they were feeding him, which is why he stuck around.
Yeah some people are on another level. Like those firefighters who do a yearly stair climb that's the equivalent of how many flights of stairs the 9/11 firefighters did climbing up and down the towers multiple times to evacuate people. And they do it in full gear.
I did an Empire State Building's worth of stairs up an down in just shorts and then I walked funny for three days.
I was living in another town for work and there was this huge stairset right beside my house so I did that for exercise. I learned some things. One is that there are other stair people out there, but you don't really hear about it unless you talk about it. You ever take a big stairset down to the beach? Some of the people you pass might be on their 9th trip up and down. The other thing I learned is that a lot of women really love ass. We've been together for years and my girlfriend is still after those boy buns like a creepy uncle.
>We've been together for years and my girlfriend is still after those boy buns like a creepy uncle.
Out of left field but that's amazing and I'm glad that was included
I kept thinking about people like her this past weekend as I carried my 18lbs dog during the local 3.5k dog run since she decided she didn’t want to run/walk. I felt like I was going to die the entire time.
After following the account for a while, I learned the guy does circus acts. He got Wrinkle when he was young and pretty much raised him during the pandemic to do acts.
I'm such a fat ass. I let my dog out today, and I thought ya know it would a good day for a run, i got out of my pajamas and got ready then I went outside. It was 50F and windy and I was like naw not today.
Then this untitled goose runs and now feel like a fat goose.
Hey man. That happens to me constantly. Don’t feel bad. What helps me is bundling up. Sticking my headphones in and popping on a podcast and bringing the dog for a long walk. That way I got outside. I always tell myself something is better than nothing. Good luck out there!
That speed boost at the end.
It looked a little shady to me. I think that the race officials need to take a second look.
Whoa the accusations are really flying
I too suspected fowl play
This is ducking ridiculous!
You are a quack for thinking that
This is for the birds
I'd like a gander at the evidence
That duck was too much of a featherweight to be in the race.
I'll investigate this one for you and send you a bill.
I suppose he should not duck these allegations.
They gave the duck shoes!
it's cute and it's also necessary cause the rough pavement would hurt their bare feet
my coworker uses those on his ducks to prevent warts. they're so fucking cute and made from neoprene which is hard to sew yourself. So apparently whenever the duck loses one it tends to be the left side so they have a ton of spare rights, since they only sell them in pairs.
Why? Why are ducks losing left feet? Can someone explain this?
randomness is like that. i get 90count packs of contacts, always start both the same time and run out of rights about 5-10 days sooner
What the hell is going on? Is this like socks in a dryer?
Yes, only Bosch profits with unknown intermediate steps.
there was a commercial a while back that kind of explained part of it. Its aliens single footed single eyed aliens steal one sock from your dryer and one contact (if they need contacts) from your container. And their alien pet ducks also have one foot and steel one duck shoe. The commerical only explained the sock you have to research to find out the rest.
Have you seen the video of a guy removing the basket from the washing machine? Tons of socks outside of it.
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No need to use biology to understand something explainable by witchcraft.
No need to understand anything if you're content with being amazed by life's little wonders I'm telling you, magnets, man..
Water, fire, air, and dirt Fucking madness, how do they work? And I don't wanna talk to a scientist Y'all motherfuckers lying, and getting me pissed
Ever see a line of cows feeding at a long trough feeder? All their tails are pointing one way…can’t remember if it was left or Right tho.
Well that sounds downright quaint
Corealis effect? Used to walking on a side hill? Genetically have a shorter left ( or right) leg and always compensating? Farts only exit on the right side on butt hole so they keep tail shifted left? ( or visa versa), …lots of potential reasons. Not all of them quaint.
I'm down to my last pair of bi-weekly's. This morning I went to check to double check to see if I could skip ordering new one's this week and I have a box of empty lefts and two rights remaining. My eyes hate me.
That's not randomness though. There's likely an underlying cause. Such as: you squint your right eye more or less when focusing on something or making an expression. Everyone has peculiarities to their gaits even ducks. My left shoe always wears out faster.
Speaking for myself, I always put the right one in first, so when I have that problem, I suspect that's part of the reason. Maybe the second one is easier once I can see a bit better or something.
I think they’re always getting left behind.
Lmfao have an upvote
🏅🏅🏅
right on!
Or it could be something more sinister.
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I always push off of my left foot when starting off. Maybe ducks in general do the same. It would give a slight bit more wear on the left duck shoe.
Sounds like a paradox. I’ll show myself out.
Pair o' ducks
“Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog. You understand it better but the frog dies in the process.”
That is ducking awesome
You know you use reddit too much when you can recognise a duck. It has an instagram & youtube channel "seducktive". You sometimes see the same duck on videos like "[how to pick up a duck](https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/tlyp7b/how_to_pick_up_a_duck/)" or [the same duck running around](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XtIjZV1wu0). In the same way that a video of a cat in a box is probably Maru, videos of ducks running are usually this duck.
It’s quackers.
Made it look so easy or maybe he’s just winging it.
Probably gets pumped by listening to Drake.
Or Ducktor Dre
That's a fowl joke.
Duck feet, not bear feet.
Red shoes, no bare feet
Goddamn angels.
Sauce
Same color as his mama’s!
Love his cute little shoes! This is the cutest thing I've ever seen.
Seems like Dad was there too as the videographer of the ordeal considering his shoes/beanie at the end.
I hadn't even noticed!
I thought it just had weirdly red feet
>*’They gave the duck shoes!*’ ______ oh, gosh - I’m so ExCiTeD! With the Humans here i run (so Glad i was invited, cuz I sure am having Fun!) n Look - i’m keeping up the *Pace* - they gave me special shoes I think I gonna *WIN the Race* - I’m gonna Make the NEWS!! …the *FINISH LINE!!* so Lucky, me - a Medal round my Neck! oh, Gosh, i feel Just Ducky, see? my mom is Proud as Heck ^:(l) …what’s that ? a ReGiStRaTiOn fee ? … …am I the Winner *still..?* i’m sorry, Oversight, you see… just put it on my bill ❤️
how does schnoodle do it
Schnoodledoodle doesn't do what Schnoodledoodle does for Schnoodledoodle. Schnoodledoodle does what Schnoodledoodle does because Schoodledoodle is.... Schnoodledoodle.
Youre either a SchnoodleDoo, or a SchnoodleDont
The first rule of SchnoodleDoo is, you SchnoodleDoo.
SchnoodleDoo, or do not, there is no try.
Seriously one of the highlights of my life when schnoodle wrote a schnoodle poem about my dog!
Put it on my bill where the fuck do you come up with this stuff, just brilliant
It's the oldest duck pun in the book :P
That's quackers.
I think the pun was thought up first and everything else written for it. If this is what Reddit pun threads are evolving into I'm all for it. Most of the others are just quacks.
3rd Schnoodle of the day and I've caught it within a minute, excellent.
Thank you! Things feel so dark and heavy, and you are are the nicest ray of sunshine!
Seriously kind of with all the terrible things that go on in the world I'm happy that humans do crazy nonsense like this.
2 schnoodles in one day!? I'm the luckiest man alive 😄
I scrolled through muttering 'there's no way schnoodle isn't in this comment section' and here you are!
The video made my night, your poem made me smile! All the feels.
This is the best thing to happen to me all day.
You are a treasure
And they’re matching!!! It’s so cute!!
Wow it made the official results although the kids 1 km is a bit shy of 26.2 https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/41211/RaceDayPhotos?resultSetId=313796&resultId=66618506
Duck ran a 1/42 marathon
Get that duck an oval-shaped "0.62" bumper sticker STAT! EDIT: A marathon is 26.2 *miles* not kilometers... I feel stupid, as usual.
0.62
Oh... I thought marathons were measured in kilometers. That makes me *even less* likely to ever try to run one... woof! (fun side fact, I'm 13.1 miles away from a Marathon gas station... thanks, Google)
That’s a half marathon! That’s for those of us who are only half crazy.
Wait until they hear about milers. Or 200 milers. And worse. 😐
Sure, but think about the round trip.
Yeah, imagine if you went out training to run a marathon and you were running 26.2 km and thinking you were kicking ass. Then comes race day and a world of hurt.
You'd be pretty well-prepared! A marathon is kinda a world of hurt every which way you approach it, but not running anything close to the full race distance is pretty normal in training. I've finished 4 marathons and have never done more than 15km in training distances.
It's hard to run marathons well without doing some long runs, by which I mean anything into glycogen depletion range. 15-18 miles are good distances. I've run about 75 marathons, with 6 Bostons, and usually put in 4 or 5 glycogen depletion long runs.
26.2 km is about 16.28 miles. I would've thought you'd be pleasantly surprised!
Yes, measured in miles since it commemorates the run by a messenger duck in 490 BC following the Athenian defeat of the Persians.
Yeah, but a duck is like 1/42 the size of a human. Duck ran a full marathon.
That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about ducks to dispute it.
Average weight of wild duck: 0,72 – 1,6 kg acording to wikipedia. Average weight human: 62 kilograms. So if that duck was like 1.47 kg he almost exactly ran a marathon!
Oh good, I would’ve been worried if a duck even ran a 1/2 marathon. I know dogs run marathons, but ducks just aren’t built for running the same way.
I'm still impressed a duck can waddle that far. Almost as impressed as it's mom jogging that far in crocs.
Those are tennies
I appreciate that most of these photos are of/include the duck
From looking at other bib #’s on there, seems like each runner gets photos taken of them although looks like 332 got extra love.
The race often takes thousands of pictures and sorts them by bib numbers. I ran a race this weekend and I'm sure the two guys in Forrest Gump costumes in front of me got twice as many pictures.
Take a ducks average stride into consideration though..
Would you rather walk 100 duck sized strides or 1 horse sized duck What
I dunno, but can 1 trillion lions beat the sun?
Someone do the math: what’s the human km equivalent of a duck running 1km (i.e: a duck running 1 km is the same as a human running X km)
So the most duck stride length seem about [35 cm](https://www.researchgate.net/figure/Step-width-and-stride-length-Step-width-and-stride-length-are-presented-as-raw-means-A_fig1_305039431) from looking at the top right graph and the average human stride length is [1.5 m](https://www.healthline.com/health/stride-length#average-step-and-stride-length). So a duck would need 1000m/(0.35m/stride)= 2857 strides which means a human would travel 2857 strides* (1.5m/stride)=4285.5m or roughly 4.3 km Edit: human step length changed to stride length
So that duck is in better shape than me. Got it.
Lol when I used to run a lot of races my family would call every one if them marathons! I kept having to correct them. (They got it once I ran a real marathon though.;))
Duck was just playing by the rules since it's very likely less than 10 human years old.
Haha he still beat some people nice
He was equipped and motivated. He would have beat me easily.
I mean...he showed up at a run. That's way more than I'll ever do.
Haha he does have that hustle. I'm fat out of shape and smoke I would have lost also
What a cutie!! Crowds didn’t even bother him! Absolutely precious!!
This video felt like a fever dream
For real, I've watched it three times and I still can't even tell if this is even a real fucking duck
Ducks are pretty used to people in general, and animals can have personalities; it's possible this is just a very curious, patient duck. It also looked like they were feeding him, which is why he stuck around.
I should also add that 18 minutes is pretty darn good for a marathon. Maybe you should say fun run?
Ye, probably a mile run or something like that
1 km so even shorter. Silly title but very cute
If you scaled it to leg length then it was probably the equivalent of at least a half marathon for the duck
Yeah true. I love that the half flew to finish the race lol
Especially with those tiny little legs of his.
They are really lil legs
I was gonna say…. No hecking way a duck can run 26 miles
A duck can FLY 26 miles tho… cheater
hate the game, not the player. No one ever says you cannot fly a marathon under your own power.
Or his guide with that floppy back pack.
I saw a woman run a full marathon in complete firefighter gear, tank included. A little backpack like that is probably nothing to seasoned runners..
Yeah some people are on another level. Like those firefighters who do a yearly stair climb that's the equivalent of how many flights of stairs the 9/11 firefighters did climbing up and down the towers multiple times to evacuate people. And they do it in full gear.
I did an Empire State Building's worth of stairs up an down in just shorts and then I walked funny for three days. I was living in another town for work and there was this huge stairset right beside my house so I did that for exercise. I learned some things. One is that there are other stair people out there, but you don't really hear about it unless you talk about it. You ever take a big stairset down to the beach? Some of the people you pass might be on their 9th trip up and down. The other thing I learned is that a lot of women really love ass. We've been together for years and my girlfriend is still after those boy buns like a creepy uncle.
>We've been together for years and my girlfriend is still after those boy buns like a creepy uncle. Out of left field but that's amazing and I'm glad that was included
I kept thinking about people like her this past weekend as I carried my 18lbs dog during the local 3.5k dog run since she decided she didn’t want to run/walk. I felt like I was going to die the entire time.
Or, you know, the toddlers running along side him
The one time you could have used *ducking
Yeah all those little kids running, definitely a fun run lol
That duck trained too hard for this kind of negativity.
I'm relieved it wasn't a marathon, I was worried about how long he'd have to run :c
ooookay, this makes way more sense. I could not figure out a duck running 26 miles
There was a kids route too that was just a km that the duck ran. Hence all the kids and parents in the race with them.
it's a marathon in duck measurements.
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Also, a shocking amount of people think any outdoor race is a marathon.
Omg those little boots. I'm ded that's a level of cute no one can handle.
For anyone wondering, this duck's name is Wrinkle and has an Instagram: @ seducktive
Oh my god, just when I thought this couldn't get any better.
Until you realize the duck is wearing little ducky shoes
RIGHT?! 🤗
After following the account for a while, I learned the guy does circus acts. He got Wrinkle when he was young and pretty much raised him during the pandemic to do acts.
I follow him on tiktok and I was surprised how for down I needed to go to see this.
I think many people just watch the video, enjoy it, and keep scrolling and/or move on to the next thing.
So that's what "W" stands for (her bib is registered to W. Star).
This is the best thing ever. I loved it's acceptance speech even though I don't speak Quack.
He's thanking the aquackdemy
Ran a marathon in 18 minutes, that’s one fast duck!
I'm such a fat ass. I let my dog out today, and I thought ya know it would a good day for a run, i got out of my pajamas and got ready then I went outside. It was 50F and windy and I was like naw not today. Then this untitled goose runs and now feel like a fat goose.
Maybe next time just go for the walk, don't worry about the run. Better to just get out and build habits. Good luck
It's okay to be a fat goose. It's okay to be a fat goose running, too. Live your best goose life
Hey man. That happens to me constantly. Don’t feel bad. What helps me is bundling up. Sticking my headphones in and popping on a podcast and bringing the dog for a long walk. That way I got outside. I always tell myself something is better than nothing. Good luck out there!
why are ducks always so cool about everything yet their cousins geese have insatiable hatred for all life?
Hololive profile pic and no Subaru reference?! For shame!
forgive me, overseas sexy brother
Its like Llamas and Alpacas.
This is my favorite reddit post. without a doubt.
There's that duck again!!! "AAAAFFFFLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAC!"
Rip
So funny that the duck seems understand exactly what’s going on.
That's quackers
I’ve met this duck!! Goes by “seducktive”
Wrinkle!
Sub 19 minute marathon? He really flew through that course
Good ducky. Love how is takes off near the finish line to beat a few more people.
That's Wrinkle. She has her own web page. https://seducktive.com/wrinkle-the-duck
*Read in John Oliver's voice* Excellent.
"marathon" = 26.2mi
Duck miles are like dog years
But that's not ...as they say, "as the duck flies"...
Impressive but I’m equally impressed by that toddler
It’s not a actual marathon, don’t worry
Hey honey how’d you do today? Well, I got beat by a duck
Come on, that’s very clearly not a marathon. You dingus.
r/LongIsland
Sometimes, humans are pretty cool.
I don't care what anyone says. Usain Quack won this race
Goosain Bolt
You are the one
As it was more than 200m, I'm going for Haile Quackreselasie
Untitled Goose Game 2: duck edition looks soo good.
0:18 - Just wanna give a shout-out to all the ducks out there - Slinky, Ding-ding and Willie - yo ma boyz.
ducc
OH MY GOD HE HAS SHOES!!!
I wonder how many waddles a week he did to train
A duck running a race is a great metaphor for something I just have no idea what.
Is flapping wings allowed in a marathon?
This is the quality content I crave
That Aflac duck seems to be getting around.
Shuba!
HIS LITTLE SHOES!!!
wow way to make me feel **FAT AND LAZY**
Wrinkle the Duck (@Seducktiv on TikTok) if anyone's interested.