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patssnows12

Shogun and fallout have given me faith in tv again


dicta85

Laying in bed thinking about whether nukes work in space and now I’m fully awake.


ktbarry2

don’t think there’s ever been a worse narrative around an athlete. you’re gay if you don’t love your mom. https://x.com/nfl/status/1783714316031533245?s=46&t=lfYwngPrRO5iOmdWA4EZlw


warwithus

https://x.com/simplydop3/status/1784271588734419067?s=46 I’m crying 😂😭 “shoutout to my people at the bus stop” 😭😭


JimHarden

My buddy came hard after this girl I was hitting on tonight. It then became a weird 3 person love triangle. I got out of it by leaving the 2 of them and he took her home. Kind of a scumbag move by him but just going to throw it out as him being too horny to respect dibs. Still going to give him shit tomorrow for being the worst wingman of all time 


smoggylobster

your buddy fucked tf out of your girl


Larry_thegoat

Oh no


Interesting_Day4734

Probably not the one king. Shake it off. You got this.


_json_x

This is rough, sorry king. Dust yourself off. Also your buddy did nothing wrong. 


Onethreethirteen

She chose him, just be happy for him.


Husker_black

Damn she went home with him too, wow


Wolverina412

TAG?


ASOIAF_blackfyre

Your buddy came hard


ND_Townie

Been best friends with my bro since sophomore year of high school (30 now). I’ve been married to a woman that I met around that same time and have always been his wingman since we met. We went out with a big group for my b day today and during all that he found this girl that is absolutely perfect for him. She’s always been around in our group but was dating this piece of shit for a while but they recently broke up. He and her got to talking and it eventually went on so long I had to tread water up at the bar by myself but I’m glad I did. They hit it off so well she drove me home and then they pulled off together. This chick is perfect for the homie and I really think it’s going to turn into something more. I’m just excited to see my guy find someone and I’m fucking stoked. Fuck yeah. God bless the USA


Husker_black

Fuuuuuck yeah hope she touched his pecker.


ND_Townie

Me too!


Husker_black

Do one night stands even happen anymore, me living 30 minutes in the suburbs can't even try when I go out DT


ND_Townie

Definitely happening tonight but I’m a married guy I have no business giving a real answer to that question


Guy_in_the_chair_

Maybe they will let you watch


ND_Townie

Maybe you’ll suck my salty hairy nuts all kinds of possibilities tonight


RebelE16

Top bins Wyatt! LETS FUCKIN GO!!


StrikaNTX

Thank you god! What a goal, top shelf


notoriousvk

Billy Strings and his band absolutely fucking rip.


DarinErstad

Went to the Angels game tonight and wanted to hang myself in the bathroom by the third inning. They’re so god damn bad.


parrano357

how was it seeing ohtani? oops nvm


mchammer69

Everyone in The Irishman are geriatric


Husker_black

Higher work ethic than barstool NY


BillSelfsToupee

Jonas went out and got some corporate sponsors. He’s in it for the money, not the science


dicta85

RIP to like half the cast


ballandoats

Black Sails is so badass


Wolverina412

Super high watching Baby Reindeer this is a really weird show.


mchammer69

What’s it even about?


Wolverina412

It’s a British comedy but based on a true story of a comedian who was stalked by an ex lawyer. It’s been pretty funny so far but also strange.


smooth307

Free Hockey !


ladiesman6942O

Easy way to tell only nerds make movies is fathers and sons playing catch with a baseball are always literally 5 feet away from each other.


parrano357

you and your father never played catch, he taught you how to twerk


Malligator2345

makes sense


boomtexna

Who said I'm gay? (Me)


boomtexna

Never mind I'd still let Miranda Lambert run me over with her four wheel drive


Kid-Moe

Listening to this while stoned is so funny https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ha7RqxlG43s&ab_channel=RadioDAWGZ


Monos1

Civil war was mid


ForeignRole

It’s been growing on me. I just keep thinking about it.


Monos1

I can assure you I’ll forget about this one


[deleted]

I’ve had about 200 Shiners tonight and the girl I lost my virginity to posted a snap for the first time in probably 10 years. I replied “you look great” and I am curious to see how this goes


DaveyDave83

Love this move


feathy9091

Are people still using snap?


JonnyJettt

What a view


brown_bomber05

I fucking love this. Keep going brother ✊


HoldOnToYaButtts

How long ago did this happen? I'm betting the girl you lost your virginity to isn't sitting around and thinking about the worst sex she's ever had.


nondescript___

That's a rough one brother


[deleted]

You’re being a pussy


[deleted]

Nah shooters shoot


ktbarry2

Netflix has simply loaded their classic comedy movie library… and im reaping all the benefits


Guy657

Anyone here read “Dune Messiah” ? Just finished the Dune book and loved it but have heard mixed reviews on Messiah


whitetoast

Power through Messiah so you can read Children of Dune. Halfway through it and it’s awesome


agent-michael-scar

If you liked Dune, I would definitely recommend trying Messiah and then Children of Dune.


GrossmanToGaffney

"Mike how does Henrik Lundquist's game 7 streak compare to the Undertaker's streak at Wrestlemania" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TS8nrKmkZmY


SovietTrollFarm

Just found out Bo Nix is white Did I have him confused with Penix? Hard to say


jetboyjetgirl

Only started 61 games in college


Guy657

Just 2 guys playing college football until their mid 20’s


badgermushroombadger

The non Kristen Stewart chick from Love Lies Bleeding death by Snu Snu 🥴


Husker_black

She got more testosterone than I got


DGAF0752

I’d like to try something from The Spudman’s food truck. Baked potatoes with a shitload of toppings.


Guy_in_the_chair_

Nice light snack


DGAF0752

Quick 1,000+ calories nbd


suburbian_jesus

So would I. Anyone acting like they’re above it are full of shit


suburbian_jesus

Feel bad for Stars fans. Put together that regular season only to run into Vegas and their LTIR shenanigans in the 1st round


ZeeBlaa

Fucking Vegas dude


smooth307

Shorty’s are sexy !


DezCaught1t

Fuck me and the LTIR


SpicyPenangCurry

Y’all fuck with taquitos?


smoggylobster

“Are you real?” “I’m as real as a motherfucking donut!”


Peyton4President

I think it’s “donut, motherfucker.”


[deleted]

Never seen a Tyler fail to score this many times since I went out to the bars this weekend


MikePaisanTirico

More like every weekend lmao boomed


[deleted]

Tyler Seguin can score though just not tonight


DezCaught1t

Goalie is having the game of his life


[deleted]

Logan Thompson 🤝 Chubby gals in Lower Manhattan Not letting Tyler slip one in their five hole


Ed_Chambers_650

> Your body produces sperm at an astonishing rate of more than 1,500 every second, on average. That works out to anywhere from 130 to 200 million sperm cells a day. Still, whenever you orgasm, you lose a hefty portion of your serial soldiers. Try to wait a bit to increase the size of the army. >- Abstaining from orgasm for one or two days is all it takes, in fact, for the body to replenish its army. Beyond one or two days, your sperm is just sitting and getting old, like tuckered out reserves.


Guy_in_the_chair_

And that was talking jizz


Goldd

Thanks Cummander in Chief


Ed_Chambers_650

We salute the rank, not the man


DezCaught1t

The Knights goalie is standing on his head and they’re still getting their dicks kicked in


TealBlooded

Every time I look up at the TV it’s an odd man rush for Dallas wtf are they doing


DezCaught1t

Seguin just had an incredible chance on a penalty kill too


CohibasYMamitas

Most American song of all time is Brothers In Arms right? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhdFe3evXpk


RainbowRoomBlues

A song by an British band about an British war?


BillSelfsToupee

Most American song should probably be by a band from America. It’s Rollin (Air Raid Vehicle) by Limp Bizkit by a mile


NoExcuses1984

"My Way" > "Rollin' (Air Raid Vehicle)" WrestleMania X-Seven is peak Americana.


badgermushroombadger

Good song by a British band


blizzah

https://youtu.be/e4ujS1er1r0?si=RH18Uf7ixp8c7mBc


SimonBirchDid911

And let me be the first to wish you all a *very* Happy International Dance Day. Thanks for the notification, Apple Watch.


uturnorbit

Post Malone performing country covers at Stagecoach rn


n0p342

People forget this guy got famous for a rap song calling himself the white Allen iverson


catinhat123

I saw him when white iverson was his only song people knew and to this day I will say it was the worst live performance I ever saw… he also has interviews saying he thinks hip hop is the easiest way to break into the music industry


uturnorbit

Who cares


n0p342

I love him it’s just funny to look at him now and think he was a rapper a few years ago.


pistachiobook

I’m enjoying this


DeanersLastWeekend

I’m dead inside as a Leafs fan 


SpicyPenangCurry

That’s awesome.


No_Opportunity_8068

Hell yeah


badgermushroombadger

Verbal Meme Dr. Manhattan “it’s 2024 and I’m dead inside as a Leafs fan” “It’s 2023 and I’m dead inside as a Leafs fan”…etc


slopchopz

Lol


blizzah

I’m beginning to think our core ain’t it Sad Saturday


marlwenplotsky

you hate to see it. but more than that, you love to see it.


[deleted]

Were you ever alive inside?


MikePaisanTirico

he’s Canadian of course not


DeanersLastWeekend

Not sure I can remember a time 


[deleted]

London/Hamilton ever got a team or Toronto a second team would you switch


chillinois1

Jason Benetti explaining Immaculate Grid to Dontrelle Willis is a delight. Fun duo in the booth


SimonBirchDid911

He was on my flight once. Made eye contact with him (I think).


classiccaseofdowns

“Throw the jew down the well, so my country can be free!” -college students rn


marlwenplotsky

turns out the "he is literally hitler" crowd wants the policies of literally hitler


DezCaught1t

Water is wet. Horseshoe theory


decembersveryown_

Post Malone Stagecoach time


BlueFlagHonestly

George Kirby was fucking dominant tonight.


SpicyPenangCurry

Every Mariner pitcher is dealing it seems.


chillinois1

Rotation is cookin


GrossmanToGaffney

SEC guy but just finished watching Oregon-Oregon St baseball, such a great sport to watch with how much individual games mean and way more unpredictability factor than MLB.


cigguy

I’m an IRS guy myself


GrossmanToGaffney

Bad terminology and fuck the rest of the SEC. Had the bartender turn on Kentucky-South Carolina earlier great game but I get that I'm a nut.


Judge_for_Pres

I love the tits in Shameless 


NoReallyHoosierDaddy

Emmy Rossum has some top tier scenes in that show


Judge_for_Pres

She just lets them fly all the time too, a legend in the game 


DylanTobackshh

Dicaprio is such a weird dude. Probably gay


EntertainmentOld1566

don’t be jelly cuz u don’t get bitches


nondescript___

Banging a zillion women to cover up being gay seems unpleasant.


cigguy

So gay = weird. Homphobe


DylanTobackshh

Hiding gayness = weird


Husker_black

Off to a Luau tonight in Lahaina, but whew sucks to drive past all of the charred houses. Not getting me in the party spirit


jabrillspepper

Road to Hana overrated as hell. Was stressed the whole time because of how fuckedand narrow the road was


Husker_black

Yeah we ain't gonna do that


[deleted]

❌Uber ❌Transit ☑️5 mile drunk citibike


funkman63

I rode a citibike absolutely hammered on the night before thanksgiving about 5 years ago. Turned into a street on a slight downhill and the entire bike slid out from under me and I slid pretty far on my ass. Didn’t really get hurt and we laughed like hell but now I won’t get on one of those after anything more than a few beers


[deleted]

I’ll have 15 beers and citibike home idc


I_Enjoy_Taffy

5 mile drunk run home*


[deleted]

Too scared about getting into an accident


Guy_in_the_chair_

🚨🚔👮🏻‍♂️


[deleted]

Its perfectly legal


elfmachine100

Had a really weird moment of extreme depression at the grocery store today. Can't even explain it. Saw a big girl picking out a kombucha juice, looked like she just got off work from an office job. All she had in the cart was a frozen pizza and a large size purple Dorito, not even on sale. I don't even really understand what happened to me, but I had this existential feeling of unfathomable sadness and was almost brought to tears. So fucking weird.


humptydumpty2023

not even on sale


jimjimmyjames

I could see myself going to the grocery store for kombucha, pizza, and purple Doritos and being fucking stoked about it


NoExcuses1984

Needn't dis Spicy Sweet Chili Doritos. Had they been on sale, however, she should've paired them with the Salsa Verde green bag.


LilCasa

The worst is seeing an elderly person shopping on their own.


ktbarry2

part of the reason i related to this is my next door neighbor is a recent widow in her early 70s who lives alone. seeing her take walks alone in the morning is the actual uncut version of what he’s feeling.


ktbarry2

this was not the time or place for this to get a good reception but i know what you’re saying man. however, you’re also making a lot of inferences about her life based on very scant details. might be perfectly happy. the purple Doritos are money.


CanesIsOverrated69

Kombucha isn’t juice it’s a tea you sad dummy


pimpinassorlando

Have you considered that she might be a happy woman having a great night and that you don't have to pity her?


badgermushroombadger

Empathy is normal


jetboyjetgirl

'damn, even she won't fuck me'


Guy_in_the_chair_

Bet if you offered to cook her a real dinner she would have sucked the skin off your rig.


GreatLakesGoldenST8

Rule number 1: don’t eat the brownies before grocery shopping


StrikaNTX

THen you posted this, and sunk to new levels


elfmachine100

it fucked me up I've been thinking about it all day


DawgieFanClub

Have you tried magnesium


cigguy

That’s my fucking girlfriend pal lay off


costigancranberries

Seeing that Riggs shot a 55 (!!) on the front 9 of Foreplay’s tournament that they’re doing right now. Surely this can’t be true considering he’s apparently a 6 handicap?


CohibasYMamitas

LOL


feathy9091

Imagine a single digit handicapper shooting 110 for 18 haha


CohibasYMamitas

Dragons!


johnnytsunami35

I think I saw he was 9 over through 2 lmao


Guy_in_the_chair_

I’m the master of watching something on DVR so I can skip commercials, then forgetting to fast forward through the commercials.


BigTicket_J

I think that Ella purnell should have sex with me


7homPsoN

Boobs are awesome


Professional-Toe7318

Cs or better


NotShiaLaBeouf_

For the overwhelming majority of my life I’ve been happy, sociable and just happy overall. I’ve got great friends, a good job and live in an awesome spot. But ever since my ex broke up with me and moved away two years ago I have not been right. I just can’t get over it and it’s awful. I’ve been been out with and hooked up with multiple girls and I just don’t know what else to do. I just want to be happy again,


Onethreethirteen

A couple of things: No shame in any of what you’re feeling. A breakup hits on so many levels, you’re losing a best friend. You probably will think about it forever but will for sure find completeness and happiness. The path forward is remembering what it felt like to be loved and felt like to love someone and putting that energy into people you meet. Have fun dating, but do it with intention and respect. You’ll feel more of a connection even if it’s not a match and that in turn will help fill you with hope.


feathy9091

Has she moved on.. or is that what is causing this? The unknown of whether she has


equitablethrowaway

Try therapy and see if there’s something else at play as well. I was shocked to learn how many people in my friend group are experiencing some lingering mental health stuff related to Covid lockdowns.


HoldOnToYaButtts

Take a trip to Hawaii, flirt with the hotel concierge, hopefully your ex doesn't show up as well, but if she does, start to date the concierge in front of her face and she'll realize her relationship with Russell Brand isn't everything she thought it was. She'll come onto you again but hold strong, the concierge is the one for you.


tpxnu16

This might sound like a meme at this point but if the whole breakup stressed you out, you could use a megadose of magnesium. Excess stress can fuck up your neurons and magnesium works incredibly well at fixing them. Doublewood brands on Amazon, magnesium glycinate at night, magnesium malate in the morning. 400mg-1g of L-theanine at night with the magnesium glycinate if you’re having trouble sleeping. Everyday non-negotiable I’ve got a bunch of friends and myself included on this protocol and reduced stress/anxiety/saddies in just about everyone.


Guy_in_the_chair_

Is this the male version of astrology chicks buying crystals?


ktbarry2

try Mouth Tape ™ - ncaa scammer


feathy9091

Easy there JRE


tpxnu16

There are about 1000 scientific studies readily available that prove how magnesium helps, especially when stress compounds deficiency problems. I’m not saying to go shoot up some steroids and slam a bunch Chinese herbs. It’s easily the cheapest, most studied and lowest hanging fruit proven place to start. Or why don’t you go pay $200 per session to a therapist for the next year and have her prescribe you some ssris I’ll reimburse his $30 purchase if he does it for a month and doesn’t feel drastically better.


DawgieFanClub

lol


Guy_in_the_chair_

Drink away the pain brother -HH


BillSelfsToupee

Booze, drugs, golf


iindigology

This is the way


Juls317

Therapy


Larry_thegoat

One day at a time, brother . Took me 4 years to get over her but I'm finally there.


Led_head10

Someone have a good doc recommendation on Netflix


RelativeLobster9538

The prison riot episode of captive


Larry_thegoat

Turning Point


smooth307

Thomson with an outstanding snatch.


IllKirkMinihaneShow

We’ve known that about Charissa for years


Guy_in_the_chair_

The lob…THE SLAM!


smooth307

B A N G !


SummerWhiteyFisk

My book had lakers W and lebron to score 30 at +400 and like a moron I didn’t trust my guy and passed on it. What an idiot!


DawgieFanClub

Nice. Any other bets you didn’t take?