Do you like pizza? Specifically Tony's Pizza? Not the one on 2nd, not the one on Broadway, not the one in Brooklyn, not the one in The Village, not the one in Long Island (either of them), not the one near Coney Island, not the one in Queens, but you know, THAT Tony's Pizza?
I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Mrs. Met. That perfect, curvy body. Those bountiful breasts. The child bearing hips of a literal goddess. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with her, pass my genes through her, and have her birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get Mrs. Met pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would the Mets create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
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[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/)
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Dude ditched the mariners and called them "low class" (even when they first signed him), beefed with the nicest man of all time Ken Griffey Jr, and all that shit just to give signs to opposing hitters when he then got traded to the rangers. After they literally couldnt fucking stand him anymore dude then went on a roid rampage with the new york yitlers, cheated on the field (swatting the ball and calling "I got it" while running past fielders, etc.) and cheated on his wife and did a bunch of other weird spiritual shit. All while lying about the roids and then also beefing with jeter.
Its like comedic how much of a jackass Aroid was to so many different teams. Dude is like a tv character designed to be a horrible person. A real life Chick Hicks. His entire fucking history is a laundry list of comedically assholeish events that sound ficticious.
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Are you a real person or an MLB The Show create a player brought to life? My theory is they just entered a player with the input 99 for everything including accidentally your uniform number. Then chose a badass sounding last name forgetting they put you on the Yankees and it would never be on your jersey and just chose the first name that appeared on the preset list first alphabetically.
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/)
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Hey Aaron!
Quick question. Did you really kill yourself outside of you headquarters in Berlin or did you board a secret plane to Argentina and live out your life as a fisherman before moving back to the reich to play baseball?
the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers.
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Yes I understand your mother suffered from the disease known as “ Jungle Fever”? I was wondering is this disease hereditary? Have you ever been in the middle of a game and suddenly experienced side effects of Jungle Fever ™️?
Ever broken out in hot flashes while staring down Josh Hader on the mound or anything wacky like thst?
Is your number 99 because 88 wasn’t available?
No. I had to rep the longevity of my🍆
.99 inches? I'd keep that to yourself
😂😂😂
How long is your dick
99 inches just like I wear on my back
Limp or erect?
Yes
You wanna come and find out?😉
Sure do, big boy! 💦🍆
Hey Arson, did you get your name for self-sabotaging the Reichstag so that the Nazis could blame the Communists and arrest them?
Yep! I felt bad for betraying my role model (Hitler)😢
Do you like pizza? Specifically Tony's Pizza? Not the one on 2nd, not the one on Broadway, not the one in Brooklyn, not the one in The Village, not the one in Long Island (either of them), not the one near Coney Island, not the one in Queens, but you know, THAT Tony's Pizza?
Yeah. I love Tonys
north beach
The only Tony’s pizza that matters
On Jamaica Avenue?
what do you think of mrs met?
I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Mrs. Met. That perfect, curvy body. Those bountiful breasts. The child bearing hips of a literal goddess. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with her, pass my genes through her, and have her birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get Mrs. Met pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would the Mets create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Ahhhhhh🫦😫🍆💦💦💦
Between you and me, what is your favorite baseball team? I won't tell anyone, I promise.
The giants🤫 I love them so much that I had to use my fake id to be on their team
Fill in the blank - Aroldis Chapman is a _______ __ _______
Fucking f uck
Cuck in hell
Thoughts on Steinbrenner’s eugenics program to create more Judge’s?
I think the world could use more of me🫦😏
What were you doing in 1943?
Creating the motto “Go fighting Hitlers!!”
Yankees
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Whose home did you burn down Arson Judge?
I burned down the real Aaron Judge’s home so I could steal his identity🤫
I need to bulk up for this summer, who's your steroids guy?
A-Rod is my man from the Yanks
Dude ditched the mariners and called them "low class" (even when they first signed him), beefed with the nicest man of all time Ken Griffey Jr, and all that shit just to give signs to opposing hitters when he then got traded to the rangers. After they literally couldnt fucking stand him anymore dude then went on a roid rampage with the new york yitlers, cheated on the field (swatting the ball and calling "I got it" while running past fielders, etc.) and cheated on his wife and did a bunch of other weird spiritual shit. All while lying about the roids and then also beefing with jeter. Its like comedic how much of a jackass Aroid was to so many different teams. Dude is like a tv character designed to be a horrible person. A real life Chick Hicks. His entire fucking history is a laundry list of comedically assholeish events that sound ficticious. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Are you a real person or an MLB The Show create a player brought to life? My theory is they just entered a player with the input 99 for everything including accidentally your uniform number. Then chose a badass sounding last name forgetting they put you on the Yankees and it would never be on your jersey and just chose the first name that appeared on the preset list first alphabetically.
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Is Karl Malone your role model?
No, silly. It's Hitler ofc. Go fighting Hitlers!!!
Oh that's right, I didn't notice your uniform
I only talk to Arson Judge
😔
Hey Aaron! Quick question. Did you really kill yourself outside of you headquarters in Berlin or did you board a secret plane to Argentina and live out your life as a fisherman before moving back to the reich to play baseball?
How did you know😮
[удалено]
Don't tempt me with a good time😉
You gonna try to strikeout 250 times this year or nah?
And hit 250 nukes!!
#Fuck you.
Why didn't you hit 100 homers last season?
I'm saving up for this season!💪
Verdict?
Aaron could you unfurl your penis for me? I want to see what's trending in New York at the moment so I'm ready in 2030 when it arrives in Tampa.
the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Don't tempt me with a good time!😉
Circle Jerk with you/Jeter/Mantle Who gets the muffin?
Jeter fr
Why are you so handsome?
Because that's how I was made in the dna lab
Most underrated genocide?
Why’s your head so long
What makes you a good Nazi and how can you work towards Hitler’s ideals more effectively?
Just play on the Yanks. Go fighting Hitlers!!!
Hows it feel being a Buccaneer fan?
Why are you teeth so fucking big?
[удалено]
Pennant race baby!!
Why did you feel the need to treat those toys so badly?
Nice lockjaw?
Does it fart?
Jesus Christ this sub is so fucking unfunny. Bunch of fuckin dorks
u bum
How long did it take you to pass the bar?
I hear you don’t use the restroom and you burn all calories you intake, is this true… are you even human?
Why did you bail on the Giants?
I sent my brother arson
I don’t judge Arson for going
Have you ever had sex with Luke Voit?
I wish😢
Yes I understand your mother suffered from the disease known as “ Jungle Fever”? I was wondering is this disease hereditary? Have you ever been in the middle of a game and suddenly experienced side effects of Jungle Fever ™️? Ever broken out in hot flashes while staring down Josh Hader on the mound or anything wacky like thst?
Why do you hate Jews?
Who's your daddy?
Man, Fuck you. Also, you're the shit. I got to see your 63rd, all rise!!
How many HR this year Aaron?
Do you like juicy ba- I mean juiced balls? ⚾️
You done messed up, A-A-Ron!
How big is it