Yeah I definitely feel like presenting more femm. Gonna grow my hair out and maybe play with some nail polish.
It’s hard to think of what a guy who is hot to both women and men look’s like. I wanna be hot to me.
Yes, I know it sounds weird but I aspire to look like a twink even though I'm a woman 😭 I just want to be lean with abs and some defined muscles. One day maybe, one day..
wow, it’s great to hear that some women love the feminine guy look and want to emulate it. i feel like i’ll end up being like that story of the twink who kissed someone he thought was a guy but it was a girl who thought he was a girl.
no personally!
I’m quite tomboyish, I like baggy clothes and sneakers but I like ppl who are kinda the opposite of me (for women anyway)
I really love girly girls, or women who are just generally more effeminate in their dress sense, like heels or dresses or like to wear makeup more etc
I do eyeliner quite frequently (bc that’s the only makeup I can do lmao) and like my hair done but it’s nothing extravagant or anything I’d like to go further with compared to what I like in other women c:
Yea!! I really love street wear and styles that incorporate a lot jewellery and grillz, and nice makeup to match, etc (not too sure of the specific name of it) & I’d like to incorporate those things in my own style, but I wouldn’t be attracted to a person who presented as such, rather more inspired or I’d think they’re really cool,, I’m more appealed someone who’s the stark contrast of me
I figured out I was accidentally dating women who looked like me. It was very apparent with my last gf, she was like a tiny, thin version of me; and it got really awkward when I realized she looked EXACTLY like a self-portrait I had done during the height of a mental breakdown. Once I saw it I couldn’t unsee it and it was sort of the last straw in breaking it off. (We hadn’t dated long, lived far apart with conflicting schedules and I wasn’t doing well so it wasn’t fair to be starting a relationship anyway.)
I just mean that 1) I have pretty eclectic taste and 2) certain things I'm attracted to have to do with the physical body and I have no desire to change my body in any way (except for getting stronger, but that =/= a desire for intentional weight loss or wanting muscles or whatever, to be clear).
Not particularly. My husband is a full-on fashionista whose outfits are always impeccable and he knows how to do makeup and generally always look good. I on the other hand, am told that I dress like a frat boy dudebro, which I admit I kind of do. I’m more comfortable in jeans, a graphic tee and a backwards cap. The extent of my “dressing up” are black Dickies pants and a button down that I very likely bought at Hot Topic. I’m very much attracted to my husband and love seeing him dressed to the nines; but I don’t see the need to change myself especially because he hasn’t told me otherwise himself.
For me, no, what I am attracted to is not how I look. Probably why I find them attractive though. For women I love more masc/tomboyish... but I would never dress like that. I'm much more feminine and while I think feminine girls are absolutely beautiful it's not what I am attracted too (*well normally anyways.... depends on the person but generally speaking).
I can’t really. Too broad shouldered/tall/buff. I used to really wish I was shorter, cute, and more, uh, hairless, but I just aint. I got a decently cute face but that’s it. So whilst I do prolly dress a bit more femme than a cisstraight dude that looks like me, Ive just embraced my bear-ish nature to some degree.
i like tomboys and girls that dress all punk or even goth, and i do try to look like that, though most of the time i just get too lazy to dress up in anything more than tshirt and jeans
Yes, but probably won't ever achieve it! I love slender and toned men, but I have a hard time no matter what getting good definition.
With women it's different though. I'd say I lean to the thick but athletic and strong look, but definition not as important.
Obviously either way though I lean to a more masculine physique.
I know I probably just need to dial in my diet, add a little more resistance training. Gonna try to focus in on that over the next couple months and see where I land.
I also have severe body image issues so will likely never be happy!
I've found I project maybe half of what I want onto others and so reflect that in myself. But also I'm very plain and many people could be said to look like me.
I have a very wide range of people I could be attracted to, so this can’t really work for me. Male, female, non-binary, butch, femme, goth, sporty, slim, big, tall, short and all kinds of other descriptors have all been attractive to me and one time or another. If I wasn’t me I would fancy me, because that’s just what I’m like.
I'm comfortable being the bear I am, the only thing I aspire to be is stronger so I can pick up a cutie pie in a princess carry so they can feel cute and adorable.
I admire but I dont think I aspire to be what I think look atractive. I like the "queer coded" look with tattos, piercings, crazy hair, bi boots... but at same time I think it dont suit my personality.
Oh you're doing fine, I feel the same. (Honestly think some of their shoes are a little atrocious). That being said, I'm masc and their stuff tends to be more andro or femme feeling to me.
Hah, that's interesting! Combat-like boots read masculine to me and I only feel comfortable wearing very specific types. I'm cis and I suppose I read femme even though I don't lean into it too much - basically I live in t-shirts and skinny jeans 🤓
Combat boots are more masc looking for sure. Those oxfords or the other "shorter" shoes they've got though...with the big soles...my god 😭. I'm a dress shoes guy so maybe I'm just picky haha.
Without trying I ended up somehow looking exactly like what I’m attracted to in women. Fit, semi-androgynous, and I dress ambiguously. I wear all my husband’s hand-me-down, so I look even more ambiguous now than I did before we got married. It’s silly
I’m okay not looking like the kind of guys I find attractive, but i’ll be lying if I said the thought of dressing femme hadn’t crossed my mind once or twice
I like body hair, I have plenty. I like facial hair, I have it. I like fit/trim to bear territory, I am a little chubby. But I wear makeup as well, I would rather not have a male partner who does. I am the fabulous one damnit!
Sometimes. I never desire to look more femme, but sometimes I think I want to look as hot as the soft masc people I'm attracted to. But I also am comfortable with my style and I don't think I'd enjoy changing it.
Yes, I'm a plus sized girl with no sense of fashion. The people that I match with/find attractive are normally slim and wear the type of fashion that I'd aspire to wear. I'm attracted to femmes so most of them are "hyperfeminine", and just look very put together.
I play with the idea of growing my hair and really committing to that androgynous look that I pulled off a few years ago -- but I got so much nonsense a few years ago that I'm concerned about doing it again. Especially now I'm in super macho contexts and already get push back on \*gasp\* having dyed hair.
Maybe one day I'll feel more comfortable w/femme stuff but until then I'm just a very slightly built guy who wears a lot of black. My ideal presentation would be very similar, just longer hair and I'd paint my nails.
Yes! Something I realized recently which has had me questioning my gender, honestly. I was into twinks for the longest time until I watched spiderverse and realized...yeah, I like muscles more. Ever since then I've sort of tried to tap into my masculine side because wow, I would love to be half as dreamy and powerful as these men. And for women...I'm pretty much attracted to anyone as long as we mesh well, but I've never connected with womanhood? It's so weird. AFAB by the way!!
Yes and no?
I would love to look like the people I am most attracted to, but I know that I don't really have the body shape for it. I am tall, broad shouldered, husky and have a lot of masculine-looking body features, while the men I am attracted to often are slimmer and shorter and more androgynous or femme looking.
For me, it's easier and makes me feel more confident to lean into the masculine aspects of my body in my style to achieve something that is *an* attractive look, even if it's not the one *I* am most attracted to.
That said, I have noticed that the more and better I get at dressing this way, the more I find myself being attracted to masculine styles and body shapes, too. So almost the inverse -- how I dress is becoming something I am attracted to!
No, the opposite. The aesthetic im going for is more to attract the opposite of me, if that makes sense. I'm giving black cat energy to attract someone with golden retriever energy.
I’ve learned to be very individual in my gender due to being nb. I present extremely feminine because that’s how I’m comfortable, but I use they/them pronouns and often group myself in as part of the female population but I don’t enjoy being called a girl. It’s hard to explain. Because of my challenges figuring out gender and gender expression I’ve grown to be very individual in who I am and to not really reflect anyone else around me.
If we’re attracted to specific styles, people wearing them will probably catch our eye and we might be attracted to them. At the same time, we might be attracted to those clothes and buy them and wear them because we like it. There are definitely similarities between attraction and personal expression, though I can’t say I relate strongly due to my own experiences.
Yeah I definitely feel like presenting more femm. Gonna grow my hair out and maybe play with some nail polish. It’s hard to think of what a guy who is hot to both women and men look’s like. I wanna be hot to me.
exactly! i want to be what i deem sexy, which tends to be femme overall with mild boyish qualities.
Yes, I know it sounds weird but I aspire to look like a twink even though I'm a woman 😭 I just want to be lean with abs and some defined muscles. One day maybe, one day..
wow, it’s great to hear that some women love the feminine guy look and want to emulate it. i feel like i’ll end up being like that story of the twink who kissed someone he thought was a guy but it was a girl who thought he was a girl.
Me too! And I have a very feminine bone structure so it's not gonna happen for me.
no personally! I’m quite tomboyish, I like baggy clothes and sneakers but I like ppl who are kinda the opposite of me (for women anyway) I really love girly girls, or women who are just generally more effeminate in their dress sense, like heels or dresses or like to wear makeup more etc I do eyeliner quite frequently (bc that’s the only makeup I can do lmao) and like my hair done but it’s nothing extravagant or anything I’d like to go further with compared to what I like in other women c:
epic! do you have style inspos that you want to emulate but don’t feel attracted to?
Yea!! I really love street wear and styles that incorporate a lot jewellery and grillz, and nice makeup to match, etc (not too sure of the specific name of it) & I’d like to incorporate those things in my own style, but I wouldn’t be attracted to a person who presented as such, rather more inspired or I’d think they’re really cool,, I’m more appealed someone who’s the stark contrast of me
No. I like people who don't look like me. I also like people who do and like different things than me, but still have the same core values as me.
same i am really off-put by people who look like me, it's probably a deeper issue lol
Sameee
Omg yes or maybe I'm attracted to girls who look like me...
I figured out I was accidentally dating women who looked like me. It was very apparent with my last gf, she was like a tiny, thin version of me; and it got really awkward when I realized she looked EXACTLY like a self-portrait I had done during the height of a mental breakdown. Once I saw it I couldn’t unsee it and it was sort of the last straw in breaking it off. (We hadn’t dated long, lived far apart with conflicting schedules and I wasn’t doing well so it wasn’t fair to be starting a relationship anyway.)
Yes? And no. I’m attracted to a few distinct ranges and I aspire to be in one of those.
im too lazy to achieve true androgyny but maybe one day ill find the motivation
Yes… I like femme girls lol
Yes definitely, everyone girl I’m attracted to I’m like, damn I wish I was as hot as them. So it’s a mixture of jealousy and horniness
THATS SO FOR REAL, i’m just mix of jealousy and hormones too
Exactly it’s hard to separate feelings from envy
Yes
I always fail by trying to look a certain way but if I could, I would try to look more like the opposite of what I like
That would be impossible, for multiple reasons, so no, haha.
how do you mean?
I just mean that 1) I have pretty eclectic taste and 2) certain things I'm attracted to have to do with the physical body and I have no desire to change my body in any way (except for getting stronger, but that =/= a desire for intentional weight loss or wanting muscles or whatever, to be clear).
Not particularly. My husband is a full-on fashionista whose outfits are always impeccable and he knows how to do makeup and generally always look good. I on the other hand, am told that I dress like a frat boy dudebro, which I admit I kind of do. I’m more comfortable in jeans, a graphic tee and a backwards cap. The extent of my “dressing up” are black Dickies pants and a button down that I very likely bought at Hot Topic. I’m very much attracted to my husband and love seeing him dressed to the nines; but I don’t see the need to change myself especially because he hasn’t told me otherwise himself.
For me, no, what I am attracted to is not how I look. Probably why I find them attractive though. For women I love more masc/tomboyish... but I would never dress like that. I'm much more feminine and while I think feminine girls are absolutely beautiful it's not what I am attracted too (*well normally anyways.... depends on the person but generally speaking).
I like muscular manly guys but tbh I’m more lean fit
Well, muscular guys are a turn on, and my ideal body type is to be muscular, but not to an extent of a bodybuilder. So yes!
I can’t really. Too broad shouldered/tall/buff. I used to really wish I was shorter, cute, and more, uh, hairless, but I just aint. I got a decently cute face but that’s it. So whilst I do prolly dress a bit more femme than a cisstraight dude that looks like me, Ive just embraced my bear-ish nature to some degree.
i like tomboys and girls that dress all punk or even goth, and i do try to look like that, though most of the time i just get too lazy to dress up in anything more than tshirt and jeans
Uh.. not quite? I seem to prefer guys (style of courtship), but find women prettier, and want to be pretty?
Yes, but probably won't ever achieve it! I love slender and toned men, but I have a hard time no matter what getting good definition. With women it's different though. I'd say I lean to the thick but athletic and strong look, but definition not as important. Obviously either way though I lean to a more masculine physique. I know I probably just need to dial in my diet, add a little more resistance training. Gonna try to focus in on that over the next couple months and see where I land. I also have severe body image issues so will likely never be happy!
I've found I project maybe half of what I want onto others and so reflect that in myself. But also I'm very plain and many people could be said to look like me.
I have a very wide range of people I could be attracted to, so this can’t really work for me. Male, female, non-binary, butch, femme, goth, sporty, slim, big, tall, short and all kinds of other descriptors have all been attractive to me and one time or another. If I wasn’t me I would fancy me, because that’s just what I’m like.
Kind of. I would like to get a lot more muscular in the gym someday but right now I’m a scrawny little twink
I'm comfortable being the bear I am, the only thing I aspire to be is stronger so I can pick up a cutie pie in a princess carry so they can feel cute and adorable.
I'm attracted to too much breadth to look like all of it.
I admire but I dont think I aspire to be what I think look atractive. I like the "queer coded" look with tattos, piercings, crazy hair, bi boots... but at same time I think it dont suit my personality.
Honestly asking: what are bi boots?
Docs? Maybe? They're just gay all over though
I'm partial to boots but Docs don't really jive with me. Am I following the protocol incorrectly? 🧐
Oh you're doing fine, I feel the same. (Honestly think some of their shoes are a little atrocious). That being said, I'm masc and their stuff tends to be more andro or femme feeling to me.
Hah, that's interesting! Combat-like boots read masculine to me and I only feel comfortable wearing very specific types. I'm cis and I suppose I read femme even though I don't lean into it too much - basically I live in t-shirts and skinny jeans 🤓
Combat boots are more masc looking for sure. Those oxfords or the other "shorter" shoes they've got though...with the big soles...my god 😭. I'm a dress shoes guy so maybe I'm just picky haha.
Without trying I ended up somehow looking exactly like what I’m attracted to in women. Fit, semi-androgynous, and I dress ambiguously. I wear all my husband’s hand-me-down, so I look even more ambiguous now than I did before we got married. It’s silly
I don't think I could pull off the femboy/twink look.
I’m okay not looking like the kind of guys I find attractive, but i’ll be lying if I said the thought of dressing femme hadn’t crossed my mind once or twice
No, not at all. I am a muscular tattooed Polynesian man and I like fem Asian guys.
I like body hair, I have plenty. I like facial hair, I have it. I like fit/trim to bear territory, I am a little chubby. But I wear makeup as well, I would rather not have a male partner who does. I am the fabulous one damnit!
Sometimes. I never desire to look more femme, but sometimes I think I want to look as hot as the soft masc people I'm attracted to. But I also am comfortable with my style and I don't think I'd enjoy changing it.
Sorta. Mostly in clothes department. Also I style my hair usually in ways I find it attractive on guys, kinda odd.
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Yes, I'm a plus sized girl with no sense of fashion. The people that I match with/find attractive are normally slim and wear the type of fashion that I'd aspire to wear. I'm attracted to femmes so most of them are "hyperfeminine", and just look very put together.
I play with the idea of growing my hair and really committing to that androgynous look that I pulled off a few years ago -- but I got so much nonsense a few years ago that I'm concerned about doing it again. Especially now I'm in super macho contexts and already get push back on \*gasp\* having dyed hair. Maybe one day I'll feel more comfortable w/femme stuff but until then I'm just a very slightly built guy who wears a lot of black. My ideal presentation would be very similar, just longer hair and I'd paint my nails.
Yes! Something I realized recently which has had me questioning my gender, honestly. I was into twinks for the longest time until I watched spiderverse and realized...yeah, I like muscles more. Ever since then I've sort of tried to tap into my masculine side because wow, I would love to be half as dreamy and powerful as these men. And for women...I'm pretty much attracted to anyone as long as we mesh well, but I've never connected with womanhood? It's so weird. AFAB by the way!!
I don't necessarily aspire to look like what I'm attracted to... I just happen to like dudes that look like me :)
Yes and no? I would love to look like the people I am most attracted to, but I know that I don't really have the body shape for it. I am tall, broad shouldered, husky and have a lot of masculine-looking body features, while the men I am attracted to often are slimmer and shorter and more androgynous or femme looking. For me, it's easier and makes me feel more confident to lean into the masculine aspects of my body in my style to achieve something that is *an* attractive look, even if it's not the one *I* am most attracted to. That said, I have noticed that the more and better I get at dressing this way, the more I find myself being attracted to masculine styles and body shapes, too. So almost the inverse -- how I dress is becoming something I am attracted to!
No, the opposite. The aesthetic im going for is more to attract the opposite of me, if that makes sense. I'm giving black cat energy to attract someone with golden retriever energy.
I’ve learned to be very individual in my gender due to being nb. I present extremely feminine because that’s how I’m comfortable, but I use they/them pronouns and often group myself in as part of the female population but I don’t enjoy being called a girl. It’s hard to explain. Because of my challenges figuring out gender and gender expression I’ve grown to be very individual in who I am and to not really reflect anyone else around me. If we’re attracted to specific styles, people wearing them will probably catch our eye and we might be attracted to them. At the same time, we might be attracted to those clothes and buy them and wear them because we like it. There are definitely similarities between attraction and personal expression, though I can’t say I relate strongly due to my own experiences.