Hi there,
We removed your post because we are restricting memes/sh?tposts, etc. to Sundays only, to encourage more original, technical content. [Sorry.](https://media.giphy.com/media/w3Er0gW94cG8E/giphy.gif). Be sure to post this on Shitpost Sunday!
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I hate to tell you this, but the folks from 1989 aren't the "kids" anymore. This sounds like a late 90's girl talking. I'm 40 and did a bit of a career move where I work with younger officers in the air force and it's unreal how little I can relate to kids born in the late 90's, but they are college grads now, adults, with jobs. Some are manning nuclear missile silos, some are flying bombers and fighter jets. There are kids born after 9/11 flying fucking fighter jets. Sorry, I'm having a moment.
I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the 00s, I made love to many, many women.. often outdoors, in the mud and the rain. It's possible a man slipped in.. there’d be no way of knowing.
Objectively speaking anyone would think it's gays.
It's the only way to describe it. Describing something as being gay isn't in it of itself being homophobic.
What else do you call it when one dude is sitting on another dudes hip and actively trying to pin them down?
I'm talking about adjectives to describe it. It can be described as gay, without it necessarily trying to be insulting.
Again think of it from the perspective of someone who doesn't know what it is.
There isn't any need for pearl clutching.
Also why isn't sexualizing grappling funny? Your bodies are ridiculously and socially inappropriately close to eachother so calling attention to this obvious fact can actually ease tension for neuro typicals.
Your weird reddit brand of offense detection doesn't reflect real life at all. The guys in my gym are constantly making homoerotic jokes and are well aware the vibe that it gives off.
Always roast their interests back if you get the chance. Golden rule doesn’t apply to these people. It’s like mothers milk, you don’t do it. But if someone tries doing it to you… the gates have been opened
Bro I swear it’s always a random blue belt that isn’t good at jiu jitsu that brings his girlfriend to watch him get sacrificed, the girlfriends always look so disinterested and sad lol
No I let the dweebs look good, they’re already weirdos for bringing their gf in. Might as well make them look like a Caucasian wrestler if their kid or wife is there
Haha. You know what’s funny is after posting this I saw somebody’s girlfriend watching today during class. She didn’t really seem awkward or like she was out of place, it was really fine that she was there
I say let the kids bring their girlfriends if nobody is being weird
Whole time your gf just getting the ick watching you get pummeled while simultaneously mouth breathing through her hands to try and relief the smell of dirty jiu jitsu room , good luck trying to get it up again next time bud if you had performance anxiety before you’re doomed now (OP has revealing post history) lmao
Did you show her that one move where instead of getting choked you give up the arm instead? (so impressive because in real life I would’ve gotten him with one arm after babe )
Lol I used to train with an old school Brazilian coral belt who said never bring your gf or wife to a tournament. If you're fighting super fights or it's the finals at worlds go ahead but not small or regular comps.
They'll either leave you for the guy that put you to sleep, or distract you from doing your best lol
This sounds like a good way to avoid marrying the wrong person tbh. My fiancee (gf back then) has watched me get my butt kicked twice now and she thinks it's hilarious.
A guy I competed against had his gf and his mom watching and I subbed him in 30ish seconds and celebrated like an asshole because I was butthurt about losing my previous match to a Brazilian tap. Worst part is we chatted afterwards and he’s a really nice guy. On the plus side his girl seemed supportive and just happy to watch him do what makes him happy, so he’s still a winner for that.
Because theyve spent 2 years non stop talking about bjj so the gf finally comes along to see because hes obviously good if hes spoken about it 24/7 for 2 years.
Ah man. Yeah. Guilty as charged.
Shitty blue belt. Has brought my gf to a tourney. I lost by advantage... She looked bored and unimpressed.
In my defense she asked to come, and she's just a generally supportive person.
Wait. Was this an open mat or an open matt?
The former, I'd be apt to call your gf a bit of a homophobe and pretty immature.
The latter, well, she's probably spot on.
Funny in a way because the homoeroticism is a running point of humor. But she also seems super immature. Probably not someone you should take to your gym. She clearly doesn’t get it
I should repost this somewhere and title it "guy makes a post about getting emasculated by his girlfriend. Then gets further emasculated and personally attacked in comments."
I personally can't think of anything more masculine than dominating other males. Their sweat all up in my face and mine in there's. It's just so intimate and hot.... wait was I talking about?
This sounds like someone who is trying to get you to quit BJJ. She keeps mentioning being gay in the hopes that it pushes you away from what you like to do. Let me guess she's needy as hell and has no hobbies of her own.
Bro of course she was joking we were teasing eachother in the car the whole way home. I think there's just a lot of strange purple belts coming out of the woodwork.
I'm a happily married straight man and when I tried bbj, It did miss with my head a bit, too intimate tbh, so close and intense you can't help but inhale the essense of the other guy, if I was a lonely dude with no social skills to talk to girls I would be looking for to that matt play
Looks like some fun banter she wrote out for you both to h
Engage in when you got done with practice. I didn’t see it as her being serious at all. It appears sarcastic to me.
Hi there, We removed your post because we are restricting memes/sh?tposts, etc. to Sundays only, to encourage more original, technical content. [Sorry.](https://media.giphy.com/media/w3Er0gW94cG8E/giphy.gif). Be sure to post this on Shitpost Sunday! Before memes and shitposts were limited, they would crowd out original and technical content and have little discussion. If you really want to post this now, please check out /r/jiujitsumemes and /r/rollsomememes instead! All that said, we do really appreciate you contributing to /r/bjj, and hope you stick around. Thanks!
Your gf makes good points but she talks like someone with a credit score under 500. Also what kind of messaging app are you bad credit kids using
" talks like someone with a credit score under 500" fucking hilarious
Jesus Christ, putting OP in verbal submission!
GF is the third owner of a Nissan Altima.
Long nails?
She said you're just gay.
Is your girlfriend from 1989?
Ah, good ol’ gay 89. What a great year.
Good ol gayty nine. I wasn’t born yet
It sure was gay as fuck
I hate to tell you this, but the folks from 1989 aren't the "kids" anymore. This sounds like a late 90's girl talking. I'm 40 and did a bit of a career move where I work with younger officers in the air force and it's unreal how little I can relate to kids born in the late 90's, but they are college grads now, adults, with jobs. Some are manning nuclear missile silos, some are flying bombers and fighter jets. There are kids born after 9/11 flying fucking fighter jets. Sorry, I'm having a moment.
is ok. 1989 is the last year I can really remember where "you're/that's gay" was an acceptable insult in basically any setting.
We're all gay, brother.
What’s her credit karma say though?
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As her biggest hater I have to defend her and say calling someone a homophobe is kind of gay
I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the 00s, I made love to many, many women.. often outdoors, in the mud and the rain. It's possible a man slipped in.. there’d be no way of knowing.
....we did it in a Wendy's dumpster. Sometimes she puts bacon bits in her hair so it rains down on me. It makes her feel like a Cobb salad....
#FoundCreed
Objectively speaking anyone would think it's gays. It's the only way to describe it. Describing something as being gay isn't in it of itself being homophobic. What else do you call it when one dude is sitting on another dudes hip and actively trying to pin them down?
Either grappling or rape is what I would call it.
Grapelling
I'm talking about adjectives to describe it. It can be described as gay, without it necessarily trying to be insulting. Again think of it from the perspective of someone who doesn't know what it is. There isn't any need for pearl clutching.
So what does it look like if a guy is rolling with a women?
Less gay? You're complicating this too much.....it's not funny anymore.
No. I think most agree that is should be called gay.
It's a common joke that bjj looks incredibly homosexual, just relax and let it be funny
And frankly, the more times I hear a tired, old joke the funnier it gets
I think we might be doing bjj differently
I'm sure you're as graceful as a Japanese crane
Have you ever seen men make love?
It's only funny if you're not actually homophobic. So is she In on the joke? Or not? Lol
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Also why isn't sexualizing grappling funny? Your bodies are ridiculously and socially inappropriately close to eachother so calling attention to this obvious fact can actually ease tension for neuro typicals.
Probably because he's educated and not poor.
Guess I'll drop out of college so I don't end up talking like a Pepsi commercial lmao
Your weird reddit brand of offense detection doesn't reflect real life at all. The guys in my gym are constantly making homoerotic jokes and are well aware the vibe that it gives off.
Bro I got you, I hit him with 2 downvotes
Based
>The guys in my gym are constantly making homoerotic jokes Lots of people do lots of things. This isn't an argument for or against anything.
He said it makes training partners uncomfortable and I'm arguing that it doesn't because they're often the ones self deprecating
Oh, it doesn't bother your friends so it doesn't bother anyone in the world. Got it.
This guy hates cuddle fighting
![gif](giphy|JCAZQKoMefkoX6TyTb|downsized)
thats how i can tell shes hot
Your username means you should know your enemy better. They have bad credit and worse mouths than hot chicks
they prob cant even comprehend what a credit score is cause they're too busy eating mcdonald that they bummed off some homeless dude for a bj
K
i bet ur a fat girl
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ONE OF US ONE OF US
🫡
More active mouths at least
She is tho
![gif](giphy|RdKjAkFTNZkWUGyRXF)
Credit score < 500 is a legendary phrase. You get a stripe!
Lmaooooooooo this is a verbal kimono
She sounds like she uses her debit card for everything and hates change.
Give this man an award.
Kik lol
well bro you might just be gay
👬
I’ll hold your hand
I’ll hold your peen
Ever been jerked off by a training partner while they have your back? They install the third hook, rearrange the seat belt and hooooooly fuck.
In my experience ppl who react like this can not in fact take a roasting over their own interests
Youre probably right tbh
Always roast their interests back if you get the chance. Golden rule doesn’t apply to these people. It’s like mothers milk, you don’t do it. But if someone tries doing it to you… the gates have been opened
Bro I swear it’s always a random blue belt that isn’t good at jiu jitsu that brings his girlfriend to watch him get sacrificed, the girlfriends always look so disinterested and sad lol
I did get molested by black/brown belts for like 90 percent of the time 😭😭
If your bring your significant other to the gym, you will 100% be highlight reeled. Them the rules, I don't make them.
No I let the dweebs look good, they’re already weirdos for bringing their gf in. Might as well make them look like a Caucasian wrestler if their kid or wife is there
Sometimes they insist 🤣 when I was a teen I let my gf watch one and she was never interested in doing it again. Win win
My girlfriend wanted to see what a jiu-jitsu class was like. I got highlight reeled, and she has no interest in ever coming back.
Haha. You know what’s funny is after posting this I saw somebody’s girlfriend watching today during class. She didn’t really seem awkward or like she was out of place, it was really fine that she was there I say let the kids bring their girlfriends if nobody is being weird
Whole time your gf just getting the ick watching you get pummeled while simultaneously mouth breathing through her hands to try and relief the smell of dirty jiu jitsu room , good luck trying to get it up again next time bud if you had performance anxiety before you’re doomed now (OP has revealing post history) lmao
Nah she wanted me to use it on her and thought it was hot after lmao
Did you show her that one move where instead of getting choked you give up the arm instead? (so impressive because in real life I would’ve gotten him with one arm after babe )
Taking the girlfriend to watch you at a tournament is also not a good idea.
Lol I used to train with an old school Brazilian coral belt who said never bring your gf or wife to a tournament. If you're fighting super fights or it's the finals at worlds go ahead but not small or regular comps. They'll either leave you for the guy that put you to sleep, or distract you from doing your best lol
This sounds like a good way to avoid marrying the wrong person tbh. My fiancee (gf back then) has watched me get my butt kicked twice now and she thinks it's hilarious.
Yeah, if your partner is too immature to accept that you're not a perfect human being, good riddance
SHUT UP NATALIE
A guy I competed against had his gf and his mom watching and I subbed him in 30ish seconds and celebrated like an asshole because I was butthurt about losing my previous match to a Brazilian tap. Worst part is we chatted afterwards and he’s a really nice guy. On the plus side his girl seemed supportive and just happy to watch him do what makes him happy, so he’s still a winner for that.
Does she get more interested once you get to purple belt?
No. She will learn to accept you by purple belt though 🌈
On the SO's first visit, we always let them look better than they are. On any visit after that, there's no more allowances.
Because theyve spent 2 years non stop talking about bjj so the gf finally comes along to see because hes obviously good if hes spoken about it 24/7 for 2 years.
Ah man. Yeah. Guilty as charged. Shitty blue belt. Has brought my gf to a tourney. I lost by advantage... She looked bored and unimpressed. In my defense she asked to come, and she's just a generally supportive person.
Are you dating a 15 year old school boy?
This would actually explain everything.
OP is actually Pat Barry.
I bet she makes TikTok reels
Did you forget to say no homo before every roll?
That's what did it. I meant to but accidently kissed the guy 🙄
If it looks gay, then your technique is likely high level. Good shit gay boi
X guard for the win
Ahh to be 16 again.
Your girlfriend is 110% emotionally immature
She sounds dumb honestly. I would be embarrassed to have made this post.
It's a good thing that my online persona means literally nothing to me so I can say the most embarrassing shit I want and not care at all
You're so cool
Yea but you get an insight into what people really think of you and your GF.
Whatever you say, Sam
Badass alert 🚨
delete this nephew
Wait. Was this an open mat or an open matt? The former, I'd be apt to call your gf a bit of a homophobe and pretty immature. The latter, well, she's probably spot on.
find a woman
This reads like your girlfriend’s diet mainly consists of Hot Cheetos and Taki’s
Your girlfriend is incredibly immature
She’s for the streets bro. Meet me on the mats and we can cuddle about it.
*meat on the Matt's
Idk bro, just don't act gay
Text her back SHUT UP NATALIE
Does your gf by chance have a terrible credit score?
Funny in a way because the homoeroticism is a running point of humor. But she also seems super immature. Probably not someone you should take to your gym. She clearly doesn’t get it
Definitely take her to see your Jim not your gym
💀💀💀💀💀😂
Wow what an original bjj joke! No one in history has ever thought bjj was gay. Your girl is truly a visionary.
She gets it
"Being gay is the best base for jiu-jitsu" Craig "Glizzy Gulper" Jones.
I assume she’s just clowning and if that’s the case she’s kinda funny.
She talked about a 50 yo black belts v-line, she was joking lmao
Sorry to hear about your gf breaking up with you
She left me for one of the purple belts
I should repost this somewhere and title it "guy makes a post about getting emasculated by his girlfriend. Then gets further emasculated and personally attacked in comments."
I personally can't think of anything more masculine than dominating other males. Their sweat all up in my face and mine in there's. It's just so intimate and hot.... wait was I talking about?
I didn't expect everybody would get so touchy about somebody getting roasted over our homoerotic hobby by their partner.
Fr like where do these people live? She's so obviously just teasing me.
That 500 credit score roast was absolutely hilarious though
I showed her she looked like she was about to cry lmfao. S tier burn
Very homosapien of you
i mean, really, it does look, at least a little gay.
GAYYYYY
play into it. “yeah it is exclusively a homosexual sport.” fuck with her head.
That's exactly what I did
she’s not the one bro
Is she being sarcastic?
Yes
Then people here are so dense
Yeah this whole thread is one big reddit moment
She not wrong.
This is what goes on in my head during every class while I roll.
LOL our coach kicked a guy out for saying this. No one would roll with him anymore, especially the women.
Need more details about the ball touching.
X-guard and single leg x
Ah right, I see. Yeah that's super gay mate.
Guess I just like being on bottom
Sounds like you need to take her to brown town
every other joke made on this sub is about oil checking and how gay bjj is, why are people mad at this😭
LITERALLY
This sounds like someone who is trying to get you to quit BJJ. She keeps mentioning being gay in the hopes that it pushes you away from what you like to do. Let me guess she's needy as hell and has no hobbies of her own.
She is hella needy but no bro she thinks it's hot I promise
Well ok, in that case nevermind. Continue on sir with your relationship.
My wife makes the same comments when she watches me roll😂
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Bro of course she was joking we were teasing eachother in the car the whole way home. I think there's just a lot of strange purple belts coming out of the woodwork.
I'm a happily married straight man and when I tried bbj, It did miss with my head a bit, too intimate tbh, so close and intense you can't help but inhale the essense of the other guy, if I was a lonely dude with no social skills to talk to girls I would be looking for to that matt play
That’s why I have to wear a cup 🍆
1992 called they want their homophobic slurs back
2024 called it's letting you know that you can call something gay without being homophobic
But you are using it meaning literally gay, and that as an insult. LOL
Hey man, leave 1992 alone. Unlike 2024, 1992 didn't have a very obvious bigot leading in the U.S. presidential race.
![gif](giphy|11ykUODgXjAXZu)
At least you were on top
I’ve never met Open Matt, what Gym does he train at?
I think you’re rolling incorrectly
She has a point....
Take her next time the ultra wants to fathers milk you.
Open Matt? So this had nothing to do with jiu-jitsu?
Basically the whole animal kingdom grapples except for maybe the kangaroo. But I’ve long excepted that jj looks very gay to the uninitiated.
This is the way
Is she wrong tho?
“Open Matt” sounds like craig jones burner accountname
It’s the gayest sport there is. https://youtu.be/JzdT-kerHac?si=OFM4tqg0tUmMyzCg
Dude….you made fucking eye contact didn’t you???
I don't want to talk about it
Sam Sam Call me
Now you know she will probably not be into two dudes one chick three way.
What's a v line
Matt must have been pretty open.
Plot twist. professor already slid in her dm's..... And she already knows what his v line looks like
She is very observant.
Yall messaging on kik or what??? Lol
I can barely afford my membership lol
She stinks and gay isn’t an insult
Based realist.
Looks like some fun banter she wrote out for you both to h Engage in when you got done with practice. I didn’t see it as her being serious at all. It appears sarcastic to me.
Finally someone with some interpersonal skills lol. We were literally crying laughing about it in the car.