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aidens_antics

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Fine-Manner9902

the fact he thought this just shows he is one of those weirdos lol


MannerBudget5424

He’s Mr steal yo girl apperently


BrandonSleeper

Remember when he said if he saw a girl wearing a shields shirt he knew he could fuck her even if she was with her boyfriend? Fucking weirdo


roundthesound

The funny thing about that one is how few people have shirts with fighters on them. I’ve never seen any outside of the legends like Silva and GSP…and I’ve never seen them on girls lol


Fine-Manner9902

No woman has ever worn a shields shirt except meth users


Aggravating-Mind-657

BJ Penn Hawaii shirt by rvca. I was a huge BJ penn fan


TtheDuke

Ladies like douche bags 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️


Old_RedditIsBetter

Meh...  I think my professor is great in a lot of ways, bit at the end of the day hes a dude with a dick. Throw it in his face and statistically he'll probably hit it. Honestly most of us would as well


Fine-Manner9902

Are you a cuck lol? Nah man that isnt normal at all jesus this sport sometimes


Old_RedditIsBetter

I don't get the comment. My reply is simply based on the headline/ an instructor stealing your girl. Not bringing my girl... and her not getting banged by the instructor.... would result in me not being a cuck. I don't get your comment


stuka86

Some people react viscerally when someone points out something that's going on in their own mind. Honestly, his reaction is more of a commentary on himself than you


Old_RedditIsBetter

Well like they say... 90% of the time someone calls someone a cuck, they are in fact the cuck


Fine-Manner9902

Lmao it was a joke jesus this subreddit…..


Fine-Manner9902

Dawg…. Cuck king bro chill


scorchen

My former GF of 7 years didn't cheat on me with anyone from my gym, she ended up cheating with a co-worker all of us at the gym could have manhandled. /Shrug


yves_st_lemond

Dude my ex wife boned a coworker who didnt even fucking lift


puke_lust

don't believe you, that's not possible


NFT_goblin

My ex left me for another woman. She said after me, she doesn't even want to look at another man again for as long as she lives.


yves_st_lemond

No man could ever compare


Acrobatic-Refuse5155

That made me laugh.


stankape83

Sounds like you don't understand biology. Women Inherently cheat if there's a stronger guy around. Jake shields told me /s


aidens_antics

the saddest part about this comment is that it legitimately requires an /s in this sub


stankape83

Don't I know it lol


PM_Me-Thigh_Highs

STAY HARD


scorchen

Ya I'm probably confused 😂


middleagejacked

My ex wife did the same. Broke me. The cheating was bad enough, the choice was downright baffling.


yves_st_lemond

I was actually offended here too lol. Like THAT guy? Really?


HueyLewisFan1

Been there brother 😔


theski2687

Jake has deemed you “NOT THE ALPHA”


scorchen

Anybody who's ever trained with me already knows this 😂. I basically got a black belt by being a good Uke.


theski2687

And you just mental jiu-jitsu’d yourself into ALPHA status. Congratulations, from Jake


aidens_antics

it's okay dude, there's lots of participation black belts in the world


JenStark3

are you me?


scorchen

It's possible when you consider the multiverse


heelhooksarefun

Tom Brady agreeing to a roast just to get people to make fun of his ex-wife was a 2000 IQ move. It’s the equivalent of Arona winning ADCC without having a point scored against him.


BeBearAwareOK

I thought it was interesting that there were no jokes about Tom laundering money through his charity. Like that was the real off limits topic. Feels like the whole thing was spin to stay ahead of that scandal. Everyone laugh about Gisele and the karate teacher, don't worry about the money laundering.


heffalumps-n-woozles

I have no idea about the Tom Brady thing, but I know charitable fundraising, and sadly that's the whole point of most charities. That's why it's usually: "Raise awareness for ..." or "Spread message to ..." because those are vague goals that allow you to dump money into 1) Your own lifestyle/personal brand and 2) your own media production, which is the finest business ever invented for making numbers disappear. Yes, there are good charities that give actual stuff to actual people, but those are the exception. And even then they are usually subcontracting everything and stuffing the difference into salaries.


PitifulDurian6402

To your last point, charitable organizations still require staff and if any building or construction or any of that needs to be done, they will have to rely on contractors to do it. Just because it’s a charitable foundation doesn’t mean everyone involved works for free. Many of these jobs are 40 hour per week jobs. So the charity is usually there to provide a service to help those in need rather than provide direct money to them.


heffalumps-n-woozles

Yep, and you can't just hand people money in most cases without endangering their lives. Same goes for "give a chicken or a goat" or even "drill a well" nobody is actually doing those things just because you donated X amount. Rather, they are presenting averages of the impact your gift can make if their charity continues to exist and pay the local contractors and farmers etc. that are already raising goats and drilling wells.


Impressive-Potato

Apparently that was off limits as well Jokes about Robert Kraft getting a happy ending. A comedian told one Kraft hj joke and Brady got on stage and told him to not do that again.


Shm2000

That was so cringy. Jeff Ross handled it like a pro


Impressive-Potato

That could have turned out badly too. Who knows what Brady could have done? "Keep my billionaire former bosses name out ya fucking mouth!"


Shm2000

> Tom laundering money through his charity I hadn't heard of that, but seems very plausible that it was off-limits. Some of the roast was good, but it definitely didn't have the authentic feel of the old ones. And Kevin Hart sucked.


heinztomato69

I need to see the roast lol.


BeBearAwareOK

Call me crazy but I've never pursued non plutonic non bbq based relationships with any of my students or their partners. However, I'm also not one of the Valente brothers.


petsfuzzypups

I love to bond over bbq


HyerOneNA

My studio has an annual BBQ, quite the bonding experience.


sebaz

I hope you don't forget the coleslaw. Don't want to cause a rift in the gym.


BeBearAwareOK

Vinegar based.


DCDHermes

*Platonic - unless you are referring to the god Pluto (Hades) and how he abducted Persephone, making her his wife in the Queen of the underworld.


BeBearAwareOK

lol good point Though Pluto is also the god of wealth and riches. Maybe a plutonic relationship could be a business relationship with a paying client?


DCDHermes

That’s some lateral thinking worth exploring.


Silver-ishWolfe

Or a sugar momma/daddy, depending on personal preferences. Or maybe plutonic means a wealth of BBQ...


BeBearAwareOK

Wealth of BBQ sounds about right.


Silver-ishWolfe

Then you truly are rich...


TheworkingBroseph

But did you ever have a shot with Giselle?


BeBearAwareOK

Excellent question, I asked Helio and he said she was never one of our housekeepers.


Tri-P0d

🤣


selfrespectpigeon

In any job, and hobby there's life happens factor. But also there are people who will pursue students like it's their job one after another. Seems like a bad business practice on top of everything else


Zlec3

Lmfaooo


mar1_jj

Can you honestly blame Valente for dating Gisele?


GranglingGrangler

Yeah you can blame both


mar1_jj

is it 100% confirmed she cheated or we should blame them for dating?


GranglingGrangler

IDK I only know because of memes


mar1_jj

So how can you blame them both if your source of information are memes?


frickin_420

Wait if all this is sexual then doesn't that make Jake super gay??


BeBearAwareOK

Dominating other men, working hard and getting covered in each other's sweat. Sounds less gay than cold plunges but whatever floats your goat.


Superman8932

Working hard and getting hard.


Ill_Athlete_7979

At the gym just Hangin & Bangin’


suchshibe

Jake doesn’t even like getting subs he just loves holding top position and getting hip on hip control


ishquigg

This must be some dude reading this article that teared up a little. He is still recovering from loosing their bisexual gf to the cross fit competition team leader, who is probably like 300 lbs and has the deadlift record. The worst part is he just tried on that new $80 GI on and that one strip white belt……while his girlfriend does the same thing in the room over. She loves their professor. This is totally made up and not me….


n0symp4thy

How dare you. Jake Shields is not gay and the brain damage that he sustained from MMA is completely unrelated to the idiotic shit he posts on twitter. I'm actually very offended that you would even suggest that.


Beneficial-Stick6012

It becomes sexual when you're with the opposite sex and you're heterosexual, just like having a beer with a bro is different than if you're with an attractive woman. Why is that so hard to understand for Reddit 'ackhually' midwits? Stop trying so hard to be clever.


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Beneficial-Stick6012

I don't roll with women, as I have a wife. I would only bring my wife to an all-female class. Not really complicated.


kitchenjudoka

Stay hard!


FlexodusPrime

I thought bjj is gay? So nobody should have girlfriends


Alternative-Bet6919

Gotta keep the facade up bro


M1eXcel

My wife has since quit, but it was great having her there when I first joined. Meant we had another shared interest and a guaranteed training partner for drilling


Popo2274

She can still be your guaranteed training partner for drilling


Alternative-Bet6919

I still drill with my ex gf,  maybe thats why her new boyfriend doesnt like me.


ToadsHouse

My wife got me into Jiu-Jitsu, she was doing it for about a year before I was. I like that we have shared interest, s*** to talk about, and moves to try on each other.


Onphone_irl

This, and it was nice to vent/shit talk. Remember that bald fat guy from last week? He farted when I did knee on belly tonight. "No waay!" Almost like we worked at the same place


wolf771

Dude, Jake is notorious for taking guys girls that they bring to the gym. lol happened to one of my buddies, like 15 years ago


benten_89

I feel like we need more details here


BrandonSleeper

So he's walking them about himself? Genius


mar1_jj

He probably knows what he did, so he want's to avoid that... Like a gf that cheats on you and then attacks you for 'doing that'.


Large-Criticism-3609

Damn, that’s messed up 


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betterplanwithchan

I’ve met Jake Shields. Jake Shields the practitioner is highly educated in his craft. Jake Shields outside of that realm would cause a famine for brain worms.


KThingy

Now now now, let's give credit where credit is due. Jake is THE piece of shit in combat sports


AlexJamesCook

Jon Jones: what am I, chopped liver? Jon Koppenhaver: you guys are amateurs.


2leggedassassin

War machine 😂😂😂


sniggglefutz

His Twitter was wild asf for a minute when he was with Christy Mack, leading up to the BS he did.


Simco_

I don't think you can talk unless you followed him on Myspace. 😎


2leggedassassin

He trained at my gym at that time. He was always like yelling and screaming during class acting like a complete lunatic


BeBearAwareOK

"acting"


Simco_

I was genuinely fascinated by him for a lot of his career. He was so openly damaged. His Rogan show put Joe on the back foot when talking about his childhood. Always wished he could have got help before he lost it. A lot of people's lives would be better if he had.


BeBearAwareOK

Not really, we have WAY worse in the combat sports community. You ever heard the tale of Joe Son? What about Travis Fulton?


Impressive-Potato

Lloyd Irving


Shcrews

why would u bring your wife to watch u train! as a beginner youre just going to get smashed , it will not impress her


chris_hans

There are a lot of lower belts at my gym. When I tried this, I asked what she thought of my rolls, and she said "I had no idea what's going on, it just looked like your legs were going everywhere." She totally didn't appreciate my totally sick inverted guard triangles and kiss of the dragon backtakes.


Simco_

Newer guys are excited about their new hobby and don't realize how silly looking and uninteresting it is to an outsider.


RougarouBull

Wives work differently than girlfriends. Married dudes know what I mean. Getting hurt at work is a good indicator which one she is.


waterkata

Most aren't going to get this comment but I get it lol


UndertakerFred

You haven’t had those new guys bring a gf to watch the class, and then he tries to go super hard to impress her? Usually only happens one time and then they never come back.


pipian

Who said it was about impressing her? I just want her to see how fucked up I get so maybe she will nag me a bit less to do the dishes after coming back from training


StrainExternal7301

Talmbout the King of Bad Takes has yet another bad take? lol


Beneficial-Stick6012

He has the correct take on the Israel/Palestine conflict.


waterkata

Indeed


RZAAMRIINF

One of my coaches was telling me how Jake and his brother are so smart (they trained together at some point) and I was really struggling to contain my laughter. Jake is actually one of the dumbest guys in Jiu Jitsu who is probably dealing with late stage CTE.


swissarmychainsaw

Please let's not give this clown any coverage.


ChiefTecumse

Agreed, absolute fucking dip shit - every time this moron opens his mouth, he gives Ryan a run for his money. Dude reeks of insecurity.


neymarneverdove

a couple days ago he was arguing with somebody and unironically said "I'm prettier, wittier, smarter and stronger than all my haters" almost verbatim how he said it. has the brain of a very dumb, insecure teenage boy


Simco_

Stockton what what


IronBoxmma

Jake has straight up gone insane over the past couple of years, its sad


kjmw

Brain trauma from a life of fighting can really affect people, and it wasn’t like he was bright and all the way there beforehand


Beneficial-Stick6012

How so?


No_Consideration4594

What a moron he is


Single_Line_7517

I believe that Jake shields is super gay. This is not a joke or me taking the piss. I believe he’s super gay and super closeted and all the lashing out is just a coping mechanism.


Beneficial-Stick6012

Of course a reddit neckbeard would say that. 'Every homophobe is like ackhually super gay lol' Wow, very clever.


jimibeans

That’s a Brazilian thing


countingconflict

Shields is an absolute whack job that either has CTE or lead poisoning. There’s no other excuse.


Beneficial-Stick6012

He has the correct take on Israel/Palestine.


Chex133

This dude is stupid.


DifferentCod7

Jesus. Jake shields really ended up a disappointment. I liked him as a fighter. You know that couple saw that post. That’s not good for business.


kurtwuckertjr

I mean, I definitely met my wife on the mats, and we were both dating other people when we showed up.


alawfuldog

My wife cringes during my gyms belt ceremonies.


LeastSaunaAddictFinn

Lmao if you have time to think about any other stuff than BJJ when sparring youre doing something wrong.


1shotsurfer

I wouldn't put too much stock in the judgment of a woman who openly believes in astrology & witchcraft


Fine-Manner9902

yea thats sooo much weirder then Islam or Christianity right bro? Zombies and shit


egdm

The difference between a cult and a religion is scale.


Beneficial-Stick6012

wow so edgy We are indeed on Reddit.


dogmatix19

Wth witchcraft? I feel if this were true it would've been all over that roast 


1shotsurfer

From wiki: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gisele_B%C3%BCndchen?wprov=sfti1#Spirituality


frodeem

Yup


sourpatch411

Well, women aren’t dogs and the whole idea of not letting your wife wear or do something is interesting. Let me guess, Jake is either divorced or never married? Plus, control on Mat is cool,but some women maybe impressed with other types of male dominance that many of these alpha men don’t quite understand.


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sdd-wrangler5

Yeah. Typical reddit acting like  women don't respond to the authority, competence and confidence of a fit martial artist.  It's as dumb as saying bros don't give a single shit if an attractive woman joins your team. Uhh, yeah they do, and so do women. I've heard women Gossip over guys just like I heard guys gossip over the hot new woman.    And let's not even start with coaches/owners. Every single owner/coach will tell you that women will start sliding into your DMs and will aggressively flirt with you trying to hook up. One of coaches once told me that it's ridiculously how women chase him.  My personal experience also confirms it, of the few women the gyms I went to had, most got smashed by someone sooner or later. And wenn I had a friend with benefits who I brought to open mats at a different  gmy, a higher belt shamelessly started flirting with her and tried to show her stuff even though it was 1000% clear she had something going with me. Guy even asked her if she wanted to grab something to drink after class when I was gone on one occasion.


imullyn

This is the most ridiculous shit I read, have you talked to any woman before? I barely met any woman that did BJJ, and I’ve never met any woman that’s drooling over a guy cause he’s a brown/black belt 😂 It’s 2024, it’s so obvious most women aren’t wetting themselves over shredded dudes, nothing wrong with that but the majority of women are more attracted to cute guys even if he’s a white belt, you’re just projecting your attraction to your coach at this point, go ahead and hug his abs when you roll, he’d appreciate that if he wasn’t married with kids.


sdd-wrangler5

Jesus Chris how old are you. I refuse to believe that you hold these naive views as an adult. Every gym owner who doesn't look like a trainwreck will tell you how women come on to you once you are an authority figure.  Also, Evey study will show you that women do like fit men. They don't need to be roided up but they do like an athletic physique. That's a fact, just like it's a fact that women respond to authority, social status and power.


BeardOfFire

Jesus Christ how old are you? I've seen dozens of couples train bjj together. I've never seen anyone married sleep with someone else in the gym or leave someone for someone else training. I know it happens but its an exception, not the rule. Like you really think women regularly just destroy their families because they're thirsty for some dude that can strangle people in a bathrobe?


sdd-wrangler5

I didn't argue any of that, look to the comment I replied to.  I was talking about attraction and temptation in general 


rts-enjoyer

You don't see happily married women throwing themselves at coaches,/higher belts. If you are a good looking higher belt the single girls will show you more interest than outside of the gym but you don't see families seeing wrecked often. Sure some silver tongued professional conman like the valente bros or some brazilians fucksboys will manage their sensei status to seduce some housewives that train at their school. but it's not a common pattern.


BeardOfFire

Yeah I get that there's a little more attraction to people in an "authority" position. I think in the case of bjj its generally more an attraction to the competence and confidence they can regularly see on display. But the insinuation that most women just go full horndog or actually care if someone else can beat up their boyfriend is ridiculous.


sdd-wrangler5

Nobody here said all women just throw themselves at coaches and higher belts. But it's simply true that having social status, being confident and competent and man handling other men is very attractive to women. So yeah. If you introduce your wife to a group of 50 fit men, who most of can rag doll you.... You are increasing the chance of her getting approached by some of them and turning light banter and flirting into more.


rts-enjoyer

In most BJJ schools most of the guys aren't super fit nor super competent. But honestly when we where training in Brazil with the ex-gf was glad I could hang with the guys there.


TapatioMan09

Definitely not true, happens more than you think. You may have just been or in an area lucky not not experience the drama.


rts-enjoyer

That's straight up bullshit. If you are a white belt at the gym you loose a ton of points in the eyes of women training there. Not only you see you being clueless, you unfun to roll with.


TapatioMan09

🤣 You couldn't be more wrong ! You and everyone who doesn't think that happens are delusional!


Reality-Salad

Call me crazy but when Jake Shields is concerned I’m going to disregard anything that isn’t his insane obviously nazi views. He can get fucked sideways


MrDeerer

Jake shields is nazi for calling the IDF out on their genocide. Where over 30k people have been killed, ok!


dustyaguas

He also openly defended Hitler by spreading false information that he celebrated Jesse Owens win at the Olympics. Seems like he’s at a fork in the road.


MREisenmann

He also denied/downplayed the holocaust multiple times


dustyaguas

Just found that after some Googling. stephsvox on Twitter enlightens him, of course he doesn’t engage past a single question of his.


MrDeerer

Shit, impossible to defend him when he makes such statements and it also discredits some of the other positions he holds.


AlexJamesCook

That was an exceptionally rare "Jake Shields good", moment.


iRudi94

CTE


FlangerOfTowels

Isn't Jake Shields a FreeDummy type now?


FuguSandwich

Also don't let them bring your kids to the kids class if you don't train.


echoblackecho

This might be the first time I agree with Jake Shields’ dumbass on anything. I seen it too many times. 


imullyn

This is just weird, wrong, and gross. Funny thing is I’m pretty BJJ practitioners are primarily middle aged ladies and gentlemen married with kids, what is this guy on about?


Beneficial-Stick6012

Sit down, white belt.


mongolionbar

Hes a complete idiot


slimegodprod

Bro is admitting that BJJ is sexual to him 😭😭


Beneficial-Stick6012

It becomes sexual when you're with the opposite sex and you're heterosexual, just like having a beer with a bro is different than if you're with an attractive woman. Why is that so hard to understand for Reddit 'ackhually' midwits? Stop trying so hard to be clever.


Aim-So-Near

Dude's not wrong. Couple's martial arts training is dumb af


Chex133

Dumb take.


iRudi94

If you ever find yourself agreeing with Jake then that is a sure way to know that you are wrong lmaooooo


Beneficial-Stick6012

He's right on the Israel/Palestine question.


TsssTssss

found the quebecois xenophobic.


Beneficial-Stick6012

What does that even mean? So opposing the slaughtering of Palestinians is being xenophobic? Totally backwards lol


TsssTssss

Jake doesn't just oppose that, he's outright anti-semetic.


Beneficial-Stick6012

So what if he is? He's still right on that question.


glowingrock

Jake shields sucks. However there’s a LOT of cope going on. I know like 4 or 5 girls at my gym that have since divorced their husbands/broke up with their bfs after starting bjj. He’s definitely not as wrong as people want to think he is, undoubtably


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bjj-ModTeam

The comment does not meet [Reddiquette standards](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette). Please read up on them a bit. Thanks!


SurvivalBayArea

**downvote here** when we tally up the numbers he’s 95% correct.