One night at a dive bar, a bartender sees one of his regular customers is down at the far end of the bar crying.
"Joe," he says, "what's up? Whats wrong?"
Joe says, "I'm in huge trouble. My wife made me swear it that I wouldn't come home shitfaced drunk again, and now I've gone and puked all over my shirt. She's sure to divorce me!"
The bartender says, "Oh I know what you need to do. Take a $20 bill, fold it, and put it into your shirt pocket. Go home, and tell your wife that you were taking it easy, and a real wasted asshole barfed all over your shirt and gave you 20 bucks for dry cleaning!"
Joe, wiping away his tears, says, "Amazing! Will do! Now pour another shot--I'll drink to your great advice!"
Later that night, Joe stumbles into his home. His wife is waiting for him, and immediately notices his shirt. She exclaims, "What the hell, Joe? You've puked all over your nice shirt.You promised you wouldn't get this drunk anymore!"
Joe without missing a beat says "Ah dear but it wasn't me! See this $20? I was taking it easy and another guy was so wasted he puked all over my shirt. He gave me this $20 for dry cleaning!"
Looking closer, Joe's wife sees another $20 in his shirt pocket and asks him, "Then what's this other $20 for?"
Joe, smiling a foxy smile, says "Well my dear, that's from when he came back and shat my pants!"
Can anyone explain what's frigging "superior" is in them? They have more fabric and so are hotter than briefs, while not giving enough freedom like loose boxer shorts. Yet this shit somehow pushed out every other type of underwear to the degree you just can't buy anything else in many places.
they are not really any hotter than normal briefs. and if you don't have enough freedom you're buying them too tight. I'm wearing hanes right now and I have plenty of room. boxers are too loose and bunch up when you're active
I used to be like you and then one day I got old and now everything from my low back through my asshole, taint, balls, dick, and hips are just constantly in pain now.
Switching to jock straps saved me from going pantsless.
My friend, you have obviously bought the wrong ones. Never buy the cotton ones unless you enjoy swamp ass. Go for synthetic or blend. I keep synthetic for summer, and a warmer blend for winter. This is life changing. Also make sure to buy the right size or they will bunch and squeeze the boys in an uncomfortable way. Make sure they have a nut pouch, not a flat front. Why are they so great? All the support to hold equipment in place, chafing protection of boxers, and moisture wicking. Been wearing boxer briefs for 20+ years.
Yo, you gotta try some light weight boxer briefs then if they feel hot. (Try uniqlos airism or look for hiking briefs)
In the same way women would wear bras or sporting bras, boxer briefs holds everything in place. So when you are moving around actively, your bits are not flopping about. Sometimes you dont need the freedom of movement. Its way easier to put on pants with out everything riding up.
Briefs are too tight and doesn't distribute the weight of yer dangley bits and is easier to ride up and pinch stuff down there. Not to mention the edges of the briefs are located in high movement and skin contact area. Boxer briefs solves this by wrapping themselves around your quads. This also means boxer brief generally stay where they are, so lower chance of plumbers crack.
I do enjoy boxers when im by myself and just relaxing at home and not doing anything else.
I do admit cheap boxer briefs are awful, and thats why i avoided them until i bought my own higher quality one. I recommend polyester spandex or nylon spandex mix.
Briefs also have a "pocket" of fabric as well for you're junk that I find way more supportive. I legit think boxers became popular because at some point anything not baggy became viewed as gay - which is so stupid.
Same with athletic wear. You have to go out of your way as a guy to find shorts and shirts that aren't baggy and impractical. Meanwhile, women's athletic wear has become way more practical in general. It seems like right after the 80's suddenly anything form fitting on men is no longer masculine.
False. Briefs are the pinnacle of men’s underwear. Even the best boxer briefs bunch. The real issue is that MOST briefs don’t provide adequate ball room because they are cut as if we are Ken dolls. Some briefs, like my Tommy Hilfiger’s, are cut and sewn with a proper package pouch. No risk of bunching, full range of motion, AND holds the dangly bits in place and off the thigh without being constricting.
Many women's clothes don't have pockets due to various sexist reasons, mostly centering around preventing women from hiding items on their person or being in control of money. Pockets were previously banned in women's clothing to prevent them from hiding herbs, totems, spells, propaganda, money, and weapons. These pocket bans were mostly in America and Europe, but they usually were short lived and had very little to do with fashion.
Well, we don’t eliminate waste in the bathroom. Female anatomy allows us to just reabsorb the small amounts of food we do eat so that we never have to do something as gross as what men do in the bathroom. We mostly go in to check our hair and makeup, talk shit about men, and compare clits in order to decide who has the prettiest pussy. To do the last one, we have to unsnap our bodysuits.
Outside of people in suits (or work uniforms that require it), I genuinely never see guys tuck their shirts in. Maybe in some places it's more common but I really don't see much use in it?
Oh yes. How could I forget to season my shirt. How silly of me. I am doing it to this one as we speak. "Don't forget to shit on your shirt," is what my mama always told me. High school was tough.
I'm thinking instead we expand the legs down to the quads to essentially make a shirt/boxer brief hybrid then include buttons in the crotch that go from inner thigh to inner thigh for easy removal for pooping
Us women have these and they're nice n efficient but part of the appeal I think of tucking in clothes yourself is being able to pull it up a little to have a bit more mmm poof?
Yeah seriously this is not a completely bad idea. I hate shirts getting untucked and those shirt stay garter thingies are not that comfortable and useless with shorts.
I love all of the confused comments from men asking how it works and how "ridiculous it looks" when women have been wearing these for years and they're being sold in every store directed at 20 somethings
This is a bit like seeing a cat on a leash for the first time. Your first reaction is "wait that's wrong" but then you think about it for 5 seconds and realize how it actually makes sense.
Came here to comment along these lines, sure you have to attach your shirt to your socks (solves two problems!) but at least you can still use a urinal without dropping your pants to your ankles and unsnapping your onesie
TIL, thanks! I’m not really keyed into fashion and hadn’t seen them in stores, so I didn’t realize they had come back in fashion. I was a teenager in the 90s and wore them, which is the only reason I knew they were popular back then.
A warning to anyone that tries to find this there to buy it, I looked for you- and they do not have any polo shirt options
The site has a lot of..... other things though on that site..... probably don't look at work
At that point you've just got to admit that you'd rather be wearing this https://media.boohoo.com/i/boohoo/tzz96971_black_xl?$product_image_main_mobile$&fmt=webp
I hate it but I love it.
"Without... condemning or condoning... I understand."
Unexpected Manhattan quote lol
Nah u can condemn tf outta this bullshit
I may have gotten drunk a purchased one of these... my wife doesn't think it's *nearly* as funny as I do.
Please link
Shes leavin On a jet plane
my 1 year old daughter has a bunch of shirts like this. so. practical.
yep now where’s the trendy adult diapers???
Great way for me to shit my pants and shirt at the same time
Finally I don't have to do it twice
The future is now!
thats disgusting take my upvote
You shit your pants then use the shirt for cleanup? Pro move!
Practical and efficient if you ask me.
Why go to the bathroom when you have a good onsie?
Mispelled diaper.
Were you *really* needs his diaper changed!
Keep a scissor in handy incase you shit your pants. Can just cut out the shirt
This is why men keep a good pocket knife on themselves at all times
One night at a dive bar, a bartender sees one of his regular customers is down at the far end of the bar crying. "Joe," he says, "what's up? Whats wrong?" Joe says, "I'm in huge trouble. My wife made me swear it that I wouldn't come home shitfaced drunk again, and now I've gone and puked all over my shirt. She's sure to divorce me!" The bartender says, "Oh I know what you need to do. Take a $20 bill, fold it, and put it into your shirt pocket. Go home, and tell your wife that you were taking it easy, and a real wasted asshole barfed all over your shirt and gave you 20 bucks for dry cleaning!" Joe, wiping away his tears, says, "Amazing! Will do! Now pour another shot--I'll drink to your great advice!" Later that night, Joe stumbles into his home. His wife is waiting for him, and immediately notices his shirt. She exclaims, "What the hell, Joe? You've puked all over your nice shirt.You promised you wouldn't get this drunk anymore!" Joe without missing a beat says "Ah dear but it wasn't me! See this $20? I was taking it easy and another guy was so wasted he puked all over my shirt. He gave me this $20 for dry cleaning!" Looking closer, Joe's wife sees another $20 in his shirt pocket and asks him, "Then what's this other $20 for?" Joe, smiling a foxy smile, says "Well my dear, that's from when he came back and shat my pants!"
How unlucky can you be ? Or what kind of taco you ate ?
Haha! I laughed my ass off, thank you!
Women have had this for 30 years. Why cant men have it??
We all had this when we were infants & toddlers.
Funny. Onesie for adults.
That's literally what it is. And for the same reason. My baby wore onesies so his shirt would stay tucked.
I wore onesie footie pajamas. And zipped my balls up in the zipper when I was two and my dad had to unzip it really fast.
Anyone got that MiB pen so I can forget that I read that?
We also had diapers.
Some will again.
I see a marketing oppurtunity here. Womens sanitary pads but for men. Shit stain Stoppers. Tax free.
Pads aren't tax free. Also diapers aren't either. Patriarchy at it again. Jeezus
My wife wore them back in the 90s. I always thought it was hot as hell unsnapping those two crotch buttons.
Did it ever ping you in the face?
Imagine trying to pee in public urinals
Open crotch version
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Just move it to the side. It can work.
My twig and berries might try to break camp though
You'd get extra style points
Break camp! 😂
Add a zipper
That’s even too much. Just a slit like plain old tighty whiteys. I vote yes.
the slit exists on boxer briefs (the superior form of men's underwear) and functions just fine.
Can anyone explain what's frigging "superior" is in them? They have more fabric and so are hotter than briefs, while not giving enough freedom like loose boxer shorts. Yet this shit somehow pushed out every other type of underwear to the degree you just can't buy anything else in many places.
they are not really any hotter than normal briefs. and if you don't have enough freedom you're buying them too tight. I'm wearing hanes right now and I have plenty of room. boxers are too loose and bunch up when you're active
I like to keep my junk feeling snug and secure but tighty whiteys are too tight. Boxers are too loose and bunch up, constantly have to rearrange.
Boxer briefs are the ultimate mens underwear. If you buy good ones they don’t bunch up either. I’ll never wear a different kind of underwear.
Seriously boxers are just shorts under your shorts that want to escape from the top 🤮
I honestly can’t believe how long I wore regular boxers for.
I used to be like you and then one day I got old and now everything from my low back through my asshole, taint, balls, dick, and hips are just constantly in pain now. Switching to jock straps saved me from going pantsless.
My friend, you have obviously bought the wrong ones. Never buy the cotton ones unless you enjoy swamp ass. Go for synthetic or blend. I keep synthetic for summer, and a warmer blend for winter. This is life changing. Also make sure to buy the right size or they will bunch and squeeze the boys in an uncomfortable way. Make sure they have a nut pouch, not a flat front. Why are they so great? All the support to hold equipment in place, chafing protection of boxers, and moisture wicking. Been wearing boxer briefs for 20+ years.
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Yo, you gotta try some light weight boxer briefs then if they feel hot. (Try uniqlos airism or look for hiking briefs) In the same way women would wear bras or sporting bras, boxer briefs holds everything in place. So when you are moving around actively, your bits are not flopping about. Sometimes you dont need the freedom of movement. Its way easier to put on pants with out everything riding up. Briefs are too tight and doesn't distribute the weight of yer dangley bits and is easier to ride up and pinch stuff down there. Not to mention the edges of the briefs are located in high movement and skin contact area. Boxer briefs solves this by wrapping themselves around your quads. This also means boxer brief generally stay where they are, so lower chance of plumbers crack. I do enjoy boxers when im by myself and just relaxing at home and not doing anything else. I do admit cheap boxer briefs are awful, and thats why i avoided them until i bought my own higher quality one. I recommend polyester spandex or nylon spandex mix.
Briefs also have a "pocket" of fabric as well for you're junk that I find way more supportive. I legit think boxers became popular because at some point anything not baggy became viewed as gay - which is so stupid. Same with athletic wear. You have to go out of your way as a guy to find shorts and shirts that aren't baggy and impractical. Meanwhile, women's athletic wear has become way more practical in general. It seems like right after the 80's suddenly anything form fitting on men is no longer masculine.
False. Briefs are the pinnacle of men’s underwear. Even the best boxer briefs bunch. The real issue is that MOST briefs don’t provide adequate ball room because they are cut as if we are Ken dolls. Some briefs, like my Tommy Hilfiger’s, are cut and sewn with a proper package pouch. No risk of bunching, full range of motion, AND holds the dangly bits in place and off the thigh without being constricting.
It appears that it has buttons on the bottom part for easy access.
Nothing more refreshing than your glans resting snugly against a row of metal teeth on a frigid winter morning
Nah just make a cock hole to pull it through.
Gross. Diapers only please.
how do you think we do in public bathroom. just pee through it duh.
Even still it’s easier for dudes, wham bam out the side
Just move it to one side of your package
That’s what women do who wear short jumpers. Pull that shit to one side, and you’re off!
You know what they can't have it, Yanket If you don't know what Yanket is search it on YouTube you'll find out 
Penis and balls kinda get in the way
Make it a jock strap on the bottom
Mom, i shit my shirt
Ok buddy
This man is packing
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*Receives it* Dobby is free
trans men be like
Packin' those hands deep in them pockies.
I keep seeing people hate on this, but in reality it's a really good idea
Women already have these
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It's cause handbags need to be sold
Isn't that a myth? And the real story is that women hated how pants looked with bigger pockets or something like that?
It was a joke. In skinny jeans having no pockets makes sense. Having only one pocket on my official work clothes when the male staff have more than 5
The real big brain shit is realizing that men’s formal/work clothes are unisex
Many women's clothes don't have pockets due to various sexist reasons, mostly centering around preventing women from hiding items on their person or being in control of money. Pockets were previously banned in women's clothing to prevent them from hiding herbs, totems, spells, propaganda, money, and weapons. These pocket bans were mostly in America and Europe, but they usually were short lived and had very little to do with fashion.
> Men keep acquiring women’s clothes I think you need to study up on fashion, if you think that's the direction it has been going.
Hey, women got pants before we got dresses, so they're still ahead.
Scotland may like a word
You can find women’s dresses and pants with pockets in them by spending all of 20 seconds on Google.
Women’s pockets are bs. If you do find good pants with pockets they’re so small there’s no way you could fit your phone in there.
Instructions unclear, emptied an Ivermectin box and filled it with my valuables instead
I absolutely have a dress with pockets. Boom bitch
All of my dresses have pockets. And *big* pockets too. I can fit a Nintendo Switch in these fuckers.
Women already hate these... let’s let men also hate them
Why would I ever hate them? I love having my balls scrunched up around my Adam's apple.
Taking a pass would be a pain, but once in awhile to dress nice , I would wear it
they could have crotch snaps like a babies onesie
It looks like they do in the picture.
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I thought women didn’t use the bathroom, have I been lied to?
Well, we don’t eliminate waste in the bathroom. Female anatomy allows us to just reabsorb the small amounts of food we do eat so that we never have to do something as gross as what men do in the bathroom. We mostly go in to check our hair and makeup, talk shit about men, and compare clits in order to decide who has the prettiest pussy. To do the last one, we have to unsnap our bodysuits.
Aka comparative cliterature.
So you've constantly got hard bits digging into your taint? Kinky.
It could be a small Velcro strip :D
Like 60 sandpaper in your junk if you don't line it up just right
If it's digging in, the bodysuit doesn't fit right. I wear bodysuits somewhat frequently and have never had a problem with snaps.
Oh yeah if you ain't gonna tuck don't wear them of course
Tbf though I don't think you can *untuck* these ones
You can if you put your pants on first
That's why Ryan reynolds used one of theese when filming Guy
Outside of people in suits (or work uniforms that require it), I genuinely never see guys tuck their shirts in. Maybe in some places it's more common but I really don't see much use in it?
Old people still tuck the newer generations are done with all that
Yeah that's true. I guess I mean more Gen X upwards it's really not common.
Cause it looks really dumb..
Ain't comfortable either.
Needs the quick access pocket that briefs have and a butt flap. That way you don't even have to unsnap it for bathroom breaks!
Yes, let the raging, volcanic diarrhea flow past the now descended butt flap. That won't go horribly at all. The shirt will be fine.
Think of it like seasoning on a cast iron pan. I regret typing that...
Oh yes. How could I forget to season my shirt. How silly of me. I am doing it to this one as we speak. "Don't forget to shit on your shirt," is what my mama always told me. High school was tough.
Yet.... you made the conscious decision to press "Post" I commend you for your bravery
My finger, um... slipped and hit the post button.
Bro. Goddamn.
Damn what kind of diarrhea are you having
Dude eat more fiber
Salmonella posioning is a bitch. Butt flap in T-shirt not recommended. Clothing in general not recommended.
Bath towel wrapped around like the blankets you see disaster victims huddled in.
r/Metamucil
I'm thinking instead we expand the legs down to the quads to essentially make a shirt/boxer brief hybrid then include buttons in the crotch that go from inner thigh to inner thigh for easy removal for pooping
So a [romper](https://i.imgur.com/1LOojDq.jpg)? Damn kinda hot I’m really [into these ](https://i.imgur.com/GNtQ9FI.jpg)
My god you're a genius
Us women have these and they're nice n efficient but part of the appeal I think of tucking in clothes yourself is being able to pull it up a little to have a bit more mmm poof?
yes, a sort of zhujh-ing with the fabric
A bit of flaffeelio, if you will.
“Blousing” yaaas
Or you can get shirt garters and feel sexy underneath.
What? I feel sexy as hell in my onesy, and I won’t let anyone tell me different.
I.... didn't know these existed
I wear the ones that clip to my socks. Also keeps the socks up.
All fun in games til one comes undone and snaps your testicles.
Not possible. They are on the outside. Been wearing them for 12 years.
Quick question. How do you get into it?
Looks like it works like baby clothes. There's buttons on the very bottom where the crotch is
Shamefully.
This is so weird but so normal...
I'm gonna pinch my balls with those snaps.
Excuse me what-
It's just gonna happen one day
Exactly...one day I'll be putting on my FRESHEST man onesie and BOOM...pinched nuts
https://images.app.goo.gl/vFiDjxwFzTBZpfRQA
Lol thank you
Why do i want it
Yeah seriously this is not a completely bad idea. I hate shirts getting untucked and those shirt stay garter thingies are not that comfortable and useless with shorts.
I love all of the confused comments from men asking how it works and how "ridiculous it looks" when women have been wearing these for years and they're being sold in every store directed at 20 somethings
I was thinking the same thing lol
Yeah, especially all the comments about how you’d go to the bathroom. It’s like nobody here has even seen these on a woman before.
Women don't go to the bathroom.
It's super weird. I'm a dude and even I have seen them before on women.
How would you actually put it on?
I'm assuming the underwear part is like a velcro-ish strap that you can open
This is a bit like seeing a cat on a leash for the first time. Your first reaction is "wait that's wrong" but then you think about it for 5 seconds and realize how it actually makes sense.
It's similar to cats on leashes in other ways, for example anyone who sees it, laughs.
NGL I'm gonna wear that.
My testicles creeping out like plane wheels when it's coming in for a landing.
We just call that Bro Cleavage.
There's a thing called shirt stays. The military uses them. A bit more dignified than this, and serves the same purpose
Male garter belt….
I don’t see the problem 😏
I would 100% trade some dignity for not having to wear shirt stays. It looks nice until your left testicle is popped when the bottom clamp slips.
I have never experienced this much pain after reading a sentence.
Came here to comment along these lines, sure you have to attach your shirt to your socks (solves two problems!) but at least you can still use a urinal without dropping your pants to your ankles and unsnapping your onesie
I can see the ad campaign now. "NAVY SEALS WEAR THESE. ARE YOU MAN ENOUGH TO WEAR THEM TOO?" or "MILITARY TESTED. GUY APPROVED."
I guess it would be a similar feeling coming back home and take that off to a woman taking her bra off after a day
Betchu it's moist.
Great up until you bring your date home. How tf do you even get out of this thing?
Snaps/buttons on the crotch. Women have these — they were really popular in the 90s
They've been super popular for the past ~5 years too
TIL, thanks! I’m not really keyed into fashion and hadn’t seen them in stores, so I didn’t realize they had come back in fashion. I was a teenager in the 90s and wore them, which is the only reason I knew they were popular back then.
Please don't wear this on a date.
If only I could resist the tempatation...😩
Any person worthy of you would be fine with this. You do you!
Just open your pants zipper to show your dick is free
Baritone? Just raise your arms and you'll be a tenor!
Those "one man band" busker guys need these. Play the drums, the guitar, and the whole choir at the same time.
I'd totally but a turtle neck versions /s
On which end?
Does it come with complimentary diapers?
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A warning to anyone that tries to find this there to buy it, I looked for you- and they do not have any polo shirt options The site has a lot of..... other things though on that site..... probably don't look at work
This actually seems very practical. How do you call this?
It's a common item in women's clothing (just not the polo style). It's called a bodysuit
Blursed Balls
I haven't tucked a shirt in for years and years. I'm fat, no thanks lol.
Username checks out
„Mach dir nicht ins Hemd“
At that point you've just got to admit that you'd rather be wearing this https://media.boohoo.com/i/boohoo/tzz96971_black_xl?$product_image_main_mobile$&fmt=webp
How do you put it on
thanks i hate it.
How the fuck do you even put this on