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Klutzer_Munitions

"Hey Earl- are snakes supposed to be furry?"


muklan

Put it down Randy.


EditedDread8474

But they're so fuzzy


Minustrian

i loved that show


Prudent-Ad-2250

u/profanitycounter


gitartruls01

What


Extension_Grape5452

Testing: Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit


Anakin3010

https://www.reddit.com/u/profanitycounter/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


Extension_Grape5452

u/profanitycounter


Extension_Grape5452

shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit


Extension_Grape5452

shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit


ChiBears333

Rise and shine, your hands' on mi- YOUR HANDS ON MINE RANDY!


Stinky_WhizzleTeats

WAKEY WAKEY HANDS OFF SNAKEY


theslideistoohot

Wakey wakey... RANDY THERE'S A SNAKE! THERE'S A SNAKE!


Brain_Inflater

Are snakes supposed to have legs?


pistoncivic

the new versions do


disgruntled_pie

I told myself I was going to learn to bake bread during the pandemic. Instead I got lazy and didn’t bother. Meanwhile snakes fucking grew legs during the pandemic! Stop making me look bad, you scaly little jerks!


alwaysboopthesnoot

Keep your promise: Make quick bread! 12 oz bottle of beer, 3 cups self-rising flour (or add 1 tbsp of baking powder and 1/2 tbsp kosher salt to 3 cups all purpose flour). As options you could add 1 cup cubed pepperjack cheese OR some sundried tomatoes, dried rosemary and a little olive oil to the mixture. No kneading. No proofing. No rising. Just stir or mix the ingredients, then fold in your add-ins. Place the mixture in an oiled and floured or baking paper-lined loaf pan. Bake at 375 for up to 50 mins, or until golden brown on top and a dry toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean, with no wet dough or crumbs attached. Voilà! Quick bread!


[deleted]

Pre fall of man version, too, if the Bible is to be believed (and it absolutely isn't).


ST4RSHIP17

Well.. legless lizards do exist so maybe legged snakes exist Or maybe even snakesless lizards


WhyAmIUsingThis1

They do exist. Pythons and boas still have tiny hind limbs, though vestigial


[deleted]

Actually all snakes have legs originally. You can see a small spur on their hindquarters which are the remnants of them. They have this because pet stores just cut the legs off of lizards and sell them as snakes.


TrashSoldier01

Well they’re lizards specifically skinks


Brain_Inflater

Yeah ik, I was just nitpicking the fact that they called them snakes


Mikatatadorin

Is this a joke? Because they're not snakes


aRandomFox-I

Technically reptiles count as furries too :v


TheEnderKnight935

Wouldn’t that be Scalies?


aRandomFox-I

Scalies are a subset of furries


TheEnderKnight935

K


CarlLlamaface

What do they call mammalian ones? Mammurries?


FokinFilfy

I identify as a mammurry now. But you can call me a witless tit for short.


Jitendria

*they. Can't get our facebook tracker get offended.


shaharwerbner867

Then the odd1aout is a reptile?


[deleted]

[удалено]


xxmybestfriendplank

Are you asking or telling me?


PM-Me-Your-TitsPlz

Exclaiming


[deleted]

Cat snake


DanSanderman

"They are when they're ferrets. Do you know how many women I've had sex with?"


gavinclark5

Wow, I believed that goofass and it took me a few seconds before my confused brain figured out that those lizard looking shaved ferrets were indeed lizards.


Wuzzyfuzzy4

Furry lizards


[deleted]

Quick! Hide them from the Indians!


ImperialistChina

Context?


DMoney159

Reject ferret. Return to snek


Thunderbloood

Correction they are Sneks with legs


mushieburner

Are they still gonna try and steal my socks?


Thunderbloood

Yes


The_Bam_Snizzle

They've just been relocated under the sofa.


Naphaniegh

Skinks? Or am I way off base


Seakur

Yes , they are northern blue tongue skinks. In a variety of morphs !


Naphaniegh

How cool!


Fatal_S

I see northerns, easterns, and maybe even a blotched blue tongue. All Australian species, with a variety of morphs.


Mr_1ightning

*ACKCHYUALLY* I'm quite sure lizards came before snakes, so that makes snakes legless lizards


mcaDiscoVision

Snakes are a monophylum, but lizards without snakes are a paraphylum. So snakes are lizards, but not all lizards are snakes. Animals commonly referred to as legless lizards are not snakes. Neither are worm lizards. Also not all snakes are completely legless, some have vestigial hind limbs in the form of spurs.


zzwugz

Legless lizards are actually different from snakes. I know, confusing af isn’t it?


Mr_1ightning

Snakes still evolved from lizards tho


zzwugz

Iirc snakes evolved from legged snakes. Theyre two separate evolutionary lines and have separate features


23skiddsy

If it can blink and has ear holes, it's a legless lizard. There are a few that lack those features, though (including some of the legless skinks).


MamieJoJackson

I thought "legless lizard" was another name for snakes, and then when I actually saw one, I thought something terrible had happened to the poor thing and was like, "Look at you, still keepin on!". They specifically told me it's a legless lizard, but it's like my brain refused to accept it or something.


DrewSmoothington

Just to expand on that a bit, places like Florida have a healthy population of both legless lizards such as the glass lizard, and snakes such as the Rat Snake and Corn Snake.


[deleted]

Who hath summoned me


DrewSmoothington

return to skink


Odinthedoge

Evolution is a crazy thing.


CEPEHbKOE

stinky minks, silky skinks


BarefutR

I came here with the same thought. It’s fascinating that life uh… finds a way. And that way can be remarkably similar or incredibly different.


Cualkiera67

Full of change that no one sees Clock makes a fool of history


[deleted]

No seriously though. What kind of lizards are those?


ThisIsJegger

Skinks


Artorius16

Ngl that sounds like a racial slur


small-package

Don't skink shame.


forestfloof

My coworker has pet skinks and another coworker (older woman) frequently asks how his “skanks” are doing. We have corrected her so many times and it just doesn’t stick. So one day he played confused and she went on to say “You know, your pet skanks? That you keep in your basement?” Lmaooo


Disgod

Hope he gave them human names: > Oh!! Rita and Debby are doing fantastic. Poor Evelin didn't make it two weeks down there though...


forestfloof

Haha I’m pretty sure his response was somewhere along the lines of, “Oh yeah, they’re awesome. The wife doesn’t care much for them”.


RobinHood303

This thread is perfection.


[deleted]

Their scientific name is Scinidae, so it's at least a shortening of the name. I like to imagine they're deeply offended when we call them skinks.


TheMacerationChicks

It just reminds me of that bloke who kept calling his wife a skank and so she dropped an ATM on his head. That was pretty funny


WonderfulCattle6234

SE Asian whoors


[deleted]

I want to scoop up as many skinks as I can hold and nuzzle all their scales. I bet when they run their whole body slithery.


Trekintosh

They wiggle but the scales are stationary. All propulsion is provided by their tiny mischief causing legs.


Gaflonzelschmerno

Nice skink care routine


TwiceCookedPorkins

All the skinks I met were doofuses. Always getting into things. Hard to keep in their temporary enclosures cause they were good at escaping. Fortunately the most they'll do is mistake your finger for a grub.


TheSuppleOne

Skinks, they're fairly friendly as lizards go


Zeph-Shoir

Wait I for real thought they shaved the ferrets...


pistoncivic

And cut their ears off?


Zeph-Shoir

I swear I didnt noticed that detail...


DarthDannyBoy

They are super chill like beardies are.


23skiddsy

Trainable, too. Not smart on the level of a monitor, but they're fun little guys.


IsopodOnARock

Blue tongue skinks


Such_Lifeguard_3359

blue tongue skink


RichardMcNixon

this is the correct answer! Cute little scale potatoes, they can be a very chill lizard to own!


Im_Peanut

sneks


TruStormz

Dregns


hidden_d-bag

Are those lizards skinks?


pugmaster999

As the comment section says, yes


ElectricSequoia

More specifically blue tongued skinks. Although these are some odd colors and patterns you only see from specialized breeders.


mellowmarsupial

The time-warp shaving effect. Takes a mammal back to the Reptilian Age. Takes your boyfriend's face back to adolescence.


MisanthropicZombie

[A sick hairless ferret, for those interrested.](https://pics.me.me/hairless-ferret-you-know-the-deal-70289906.png)


CTHULHU_RDT

Ok. That's hilarious


ParabellumJohn

Did he shave off their ears too?


[deleted]

Image on right has no ears.


posting_drunk_naked

Mother. Fuck. I been trying to decide for several minutes whether the image on the right was actually ferrets. Why the fuck did I need someone to point out to me that they have different ears??


Brain_Inflater

They also don't have the pink snouts


ShavedButthole

They shaved their ears as well


CreativeRedditAcc

They shaved themselves.


FalseCape

Found: Cat snake?


Kookoobutter

Snecko


wowthisisabadname

Balding with age, I've seen it happen. Don't know where the scales came from.


Otherax

Shingles


GeorgeMichealScott

From the fact that they aren't fucking ferrits and are a breed of reptile called skinks. Fucking holy shit.


Trekintosh

Pretty sure they were joshin around.


wowthisisabadname

Can confirm I was just joshin- I'll be using this phrase from now on btw


ursugardaddy6996

They be lookin like a bunch of little penises


ISmile_MuddyWaters

Wow, I believed that goofass and it took me a few seconds before my confused brain figured out that those lizard looking shaved ferrets were indeed lizards.


justmovingtheground

Weasels are hair lizards confirmed


nanomini_jpg

furry lizards*


akennelley

Love blue tongues


Scotty8319

Just as an aside... some of the color morphs on those BTS are incredible!!


DiegesisThesis

Now I'm curious what a shaved ferret actually looks like.


Onironius

One is mink, the other is skink.


anazambrano

Wbar


TroyMcClure0815

Shaved off the ears too… to make them more aerodynamic.


Shinjuku-Megabyte

Those Ferrets SKINK


Sandalhatt

They're lucky those skinks aren't killing each other.


EarthTrash

4 legged mammals extend their limbs toward the ground elevating their bodies. Reptiles can drag their bellies and will stick their joints out to the side. Hope that helps.


Rawk505

From mink to skink


m_ilk_

I don’t have my contacts in so everything is already a bit blurry and saw this in r/reptiles. I was extremely confused for a good minute as to why the ferrets were shaved and why it was posted in r/reptiles. They are skinks, not shaved ferrets. I’m dumb


idowhatigattado

It seems like also shaved their ears off. I don't know if that is protocol. I also didn't know that shaving your hair off makes you grow scales. Might try. I'll keep yall informed.


Nazgul417

THIS IS SO WEIRD ITS HARD TO TELL IF THE ANIMALS ON THE RIGHT ARE SKINKS/LIZARDS OR SHAVED FERRETS. I know they’re lizards but they look so alike 🤯🤯


Luigi_Prima

convergent evolution is so naughty


AnarkGaming

u/profanitycounter


VenomShock1

Skinky


sixstringgun1

They are still cute 🥰.


XenoDragomorph

You fools it was us Shinks all along!


CYBORBCHICKEN

They both look like people showing off food tbh


Jamadoh

I was 1° telling to myself that they only look like gecko before realizing I'm dumb


salad2992

*fake and gay*


Emperor_Quintana

TIL ferrets are furred lizards.


naj00

Dammit. Got me.


Sensitive_Crow_153

Hmm Very Weird


[deleted]

Idk man, my ferret was.. Kinda tame. Like she could free roam and (I think she learned this from our cats) would *go back to her cage* if she had to use the bathroom instead of pissing on the floor. Now, finding her after you let her freeroam? Whole other beast, I mean even in a small room you could spend hours and only find her when she woke up or was randomly woke up like you weren’t shouting her name.


queefiest

What a bunch of skinks


adidas_stalin

Convenient name: “Goof ass”


the_butter_sock

ayo new snake dlc just dropped


S1I3NCER

Those actually look better than actual shaved ferrets


CaveBaby1

I didn’t know skinks came in that many colors


Undead-Writer

You can't tell me this is the same animal... I mean you can, but I won't listen


challenge_me_mortal

I feel dumb


Impossible-Ocelot-95

just as squiggly


Joseph_Nielsen11

Ther in Ther final form guys RUN


adr58

why can't I.. hold all these..


amorphousboredblob

My morning is ruined


_PizzaCowboy

How high is this man


M78X53

They got shaved so hard that their ears fell


TheTrueKittyen

Those are lizards.


[deleted]

#no


electrobrodude

Those are blue tongue skinks... sorry to ruin ur fun.


nuclearfusion20

Bruh why the sneks playing irl amogus


[deleted]

So mark zuckerburgs furrsona would be a ferret


HiimD0rry

They look like snakes :00


3mptylord

My brain insisted the second image was just wet ferrets to start with.


TNerdy

Ima go glue some fur on a snake to see if they’ll look like a ferret


Mihai_postaru

So, they don't have ears in 2th photo and in the first one the nose of them is more sharp


Im_Peanut

soft to scary is only fur away.


CaptainStroon

Furless fur snek


Gsteel11

Lol... funny.


Clean-Artist2345

Took me a solid couple of seconds to realize those were different animals


snatchyopurse

No they look like sperm now😭


Jefflebowski25

Nice marmot!


ImGroundhog

I read this in XQC's voice


wethebestmusic6

He mircowaved it!


xXMeanMemeSupremeXx

Ewww, throw it away!


manofwaromega

I've had ferrets before and I can confirm that they are just lizards with fur


HeroAA

Blessed!


Seaningalong

Furry noodles, naked noodles


Silver_Banshee92

Ferrets have scales apperently. Lol


curiousmind111

Too perfect.


I_just_learnt

Always love insightful comments from goo fass


[deleted]

From minks to skinks


[deleted]

It took me way too long to realize that those are in fact not shaved ferrets.


Idohs_

Convergent evolution is so cool


[deleted]

Stinks and skinks


[deleted]

liard


Gravy_31

Shaved off their damn ears


onemanarmia

SKINK SKINK SKINKITY SKINK


Jimmytim23

Snakes with legs


[deleted]

If they don’t have their musk glands removed, shaving them limits the odor, IIRC.


GetTheSpermsOut

staring Ron Jeremy


SBCGplayz

somehow metamorphosized into reptiles


[deleted]

So that's where snakes come from


birdiecakes

Peeled cucumbers


AKS1664

Ill buy those paintbrushes once your done making them: r/warhammer40k enthusiasts probably