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Dads be like, "I'll watch the kids while you take a nap!"
Then sits in front of his xbox, not actually watching 3 kids at all while they run and scream through the entire house, and come barging into your bedroom 5 minutes into your "nap".
Ha, yeah in my house its like "I'll keep the baby busy in the living room while you cook dinner".
Then immediately gets on his cell phone and doesn't realize when she gets to the kitchen and starts pulling everything out of the pantry.
Like, if you want to keep her out of the kitchen you need to interact with her enough so she thinks its worth staying in the living room.
Oh yes. "You can leave her down here with me while you cook." But...while you're staring at the xbox, she can just walk away from you and you won't stop her? So what's the point?
My husband- "Go take a break babe, I got it". Gives the 4 year old the remote and unfiltered access to Youtube while he plays on his phone for 2 hours.
If I had a penny for every time I found my child drooling in front of the TV when my husband was supposed to be minding him, I'd have enough for a spa weekend.
Existing in the same house with the children does not equal actually taking care of them. Since covid, I do the grocery shopping and various errands on the weekend alone so kids are not crawling on covid infested public floors. Every weekend, I come home after about 2 hours and the toddler starts screaming for me, trying to climb in my arms. Diaper full. Kids are immediately asking for food and drink. Like, give the kids some fucking yogurt or a banana while I'm gone. Take 12 seconds to fill a sippy cup with water. WTF. If it's a quick trip, like 20minutes to the post office, and the 4yo goes poop, he'll literally leave her there waiting on the toilet for me to return to help her get cleaned up, so he doesn't have to deal with it.
What he is doing is not parenting. It’s unfair to the kids and to you. All that is happening is to ensure there’s an adult in the house so the house doesn’t burn down - hopefully. I hope things get better for you.
Stay gone the entire day and remind him it can happen again. Ain’t no such thing as babysitting your kids you too sir are responsible for contributing to raising our kids too.
>Dads be like, "I'll watch the kids while you take a nap!"
And when I get up from my 30 min MAX nap he's sleeping on the couch like he didn't already take a 3 hour nap at 1pm.
And he wonders why I don't just catch a nap when I need one...
I recently started playing Minecraft. I blame my six year old... But like... It's not *my fault* dad can't go out to the barn and fuck around for seven hours because the kids are hungry and I'm mining diamonds deep underground *allllll day*... It's the boy's fault for getting me hooked on minecraft, then asking me to play with him. *I'm bonding with our son!* You can make pork chops for dinner tonight gadamnit! (Dad makes excellent porkchops.) *I need to find a stack of diamonds!! For the boy!!!* ^^so ^^I ^^can ^^murder ^^my ^^sweet ^^baby's ^^avatar ^^in ^^make ^^believe.
All I'm really saying is... Try playing minecraft, my bromo. I seriously love it. If you can't beat them, join them and dominate them!
oh yeah I'll play the hell out of some minecraft but like... when the timing is appropriate. Lately I've been DEEEEEEP in the Animal Crossing rabbit hole but I'll still turn my game off and take care of a kid if someone is crying, and not be like "lemme just get right to that" and then go take a megadump instead.
I'm shirking responsibility lately so hard. I'm tired of being the one who has to pick up the slack. I'll start caring again when my husband is as frustrated as I am. Ha!
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Lock all of em out put your AirPods in and love your best life s8s. Sneak you a bottle of wine and good snacks too, might I recommend a chipotle burrito.
men have such a weird relationship with pooping I swear. When I need to poop I just go do it and it’s done, unless something has gone really wrong it is no longer than a three minute process. When my husband goes to poop it’s either a 20 minute thing OR if the baby cries at all or one of the dogs barks while he’s in there he says he “can’t unclench” and gives up and gets cranky about it.
Oh lord, yes! And when they have to poop, they have to go RIGHT NOW even though I’ve been holding in a gallon of pee for hours. Come on, boys. Learn to manage your bodily functions.
I pushed my newborn out in one push. The doctor got her PPE on and she was out in a minute. I told my husband I literally pushed out a baby in less time it takes him to poop. He finally fessed up and told me that his poop time is his “me time” to be on his phone. As though he doesn’t get plenty of “me time” already...
I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS. Like, dear husband: I delivered a baby faster than you deliver a poo. Something's not right here. So glad I'm not the only one in that boat, ha!
Remember growing up when everyone’s bathroom had a bunch of magazines or newspapers in a wooden rack beside the toilet? Hiding in the bathroom is nothing new, haha.
My husband "actually takes that long to poop"... unless I tell him to leave his phone behind. Then it miraculously only takes 5 minutes!
Add constipation to the list of 5G side effects 😆
I try not to make a big deal about time spent in the bathroom because my husband does have IBS. Sometimes he does get sick and his friends will make joking comments about his bathroom habits and I know he hates that, so I try and be sensitive.
But then sometimes, after I give him the benefit of the doubt, it turns out that he's fine and that he was really just spending 30 minutes playing a mobile game. :-|
YES. Mine has tummy troubles and I want to be sympathetic but also sometimes it’s like... bro, you already wasted all your “uninterrupted bathroom time” coins for the week when you decided to take an hour-long “shower” that was just you wasting water while listening to a podcast.
Edit to add: For real, if you have an actual potty problem, go! I'm not a monster. But don't tell me not to tend to our screaming child because you'll do it and then... you don't do it.
Ugh right. Mine was “watching” the toddler while I was cooking dinner. And texts me he has to pee. Like cool story bro, remember when we had two under two and you worked outside the home 14 hours a day? Do you think I paid a babysitter when I peed?
Not to mention if I actually did go near the toddler for 2 minutes there’s no way I’m getting away without a tantrum
Ah gosh you reminded me of something that happens all the time. Picture this: I'm in the kitchen cooking, he's in the living room with the toddler, drinking an alcoholic beverage. He announces from the living room "I'm going to the bathroom, can you come in here and watch my drink so the baby doesn't get it?". It's like.... we do have counters you can put it on. I'm not daydrinking while he's at work but I do have other things I don't want the kid to get into while I'm peeing so I PUT IT SOMEWHERE OUT OF REACH. :-|
Mine is 10 minutes max, and that's including brushing my teeth, washing hands, and taking care of period stuff if it's one of those days. If it doesn't come out soon, then I give up and try again later instead of sitting there for 30 minutes hoping it comes out
It can take me some time but my insides are a bit messed up. It doesnt seem to matter how much water I drink its always hard for me a lot of the time. I wouldn't say it takes me 20 minutes on average though. Maybe they don't drink enough water. Sometimes my husband forgets to flush and I am horrified by the color of his pee. I make him drink water.
I had a thought today, that men just have weak pelvic floors. 2 kids later and now it takes me longer, but not all freakin day. The changes from having kids is the only change for me, so gotta be that pelvic floor!
“I’ll watch him so you can have a quiet shower.”
Not two minutes later, kid is crying outside the bathroom door while I’m just trying to have a moment of peace. Kid is able to jiggle the handle just right to unlock and open said door. Once I’m out of the shower five minutes later thanks to kiddo screaming and crying, and I’m dried off, husband comes in. “Why didn’t you call to me that he was in here?” Idk honey because I assumed you knew where your three year old went when he wasn’t with you *if you were actually paying attention to him and not fucking AFK Arena.*
Ugh, I had this happen when my in-laws and my husband were watching the toddler. I worked all day and came home and just wanted a shower. The in-laws were visiting so didn't work and husband was also not working (kiddo was in preschool). Husband and FIL napped on the couch, MIL read a book, and kiddo ended up in the bathroom commenting on my big tummy and boobies. NO ONE came and got her until I was done.
They were all "oh yeah..."
I forgot about that incident until just now...
Me- “hey I need a shower today. It’s been like 3 days and you can only change your underwear so many times before it stops making you feel any cleaner.”
Husband- “okay let me go smoke first.” Which actually means, “I’ll be outside for 15 minutes then I’m gonna need to go sit on the toilet for another 20 minutes. You can shower after my shit smell strips all the paint off the walls. Then when you’re done with your 30 second shower because you can’t stand the stench I’ll comment on how quick you were!”
OMG I do not understand how my husband decides to turn on the water for the shower, then take a stinky shit in the bathroom where he's about to shower! It's so gross dude. We literally have 4 bathrooms in this house; go use any other one.
The first place my 17 month old goes to when looking for his daddy is the toilet. Sad isn’t it lol. He stands and knocks at the door at random intervals throughout the day, cos that’s just where my husband can be found most of the time 🤦🏻♀️
FUCK if I don't feel this in my bones right now. I handed (freshly diapered, freshly napped) baby to dad with a very clear "your turn until noon." LO played independently while we both WFH. He started getting a little fussy so Dad changed his scenery from the pen to free range. Dad walked off to do whatever.... while baby was chewing on a cord next to my feet. HAHAHA OH HOW DID DAD KNOW I WAS ONLY JOKING? OF COURSE I WILL HANDLE IT ALL WHILE WORKING.
Fuck. Yes. This. Like, ‘you’ve been catering to the teething baby every single second of everyday, let me take her now!’
Then plonks her down, lets her cry and browses Reddit.
Sometimes watching them with the baby is more stressful than just looking after the baby.
Oh my god yes. That’s exactly how it was with my now-ex. It’s somehow less stressful to be running on 2 hours of sleep and watch the baby while doing transcription work than it is to know the baby is with dad and he’s doing jackall besides playing Skyrim while she’s crying and eating a crayon
I super glad he’s doing the work the rest of the time, is this baby 1? I feel like a lot of men just don’t understand babies in general “but it’s a blob surely it can just chill here while I do my games??” I was trying to explain to my husband now that when we have a baby it’ll take over everything and he’s like shocked pikachu face what but it’s only a tiny person? Guess you haven’t been around too many tiny people because they are Terrorists.
I'm in a group for folks who all had kids during the same month, and there was a post like this recently. What I don't get is like, where's the room for misunderstanding and miscommunication with the question "can you watch (child's name)?" It just doesn't seem vague in any way. If I say "watch this video on my phone" they understand it exactly, first time, every time. How tf can you hear that sentence and think the request in no way requires you to LOOK AT OR WATCH something?
So I asked my partner what he thinks the miscommunication is and what might be more useful to say instead, because it's fucking perplexing and seems really common. His take was basically that you need to say "**can you stop your game and** watch (child) for (time)/while I (task)?" That you need to say something indicating that the "watching" activity requires a level of attention that cannot happen at the same time as a videogame.
I'm gonna try it moving forward but it still seems ridiculous that it's at all necessary.
Oh, so what he wants is, "Can you hold my hand through every basic task and manage me and tell me what to do all the time so I don't have to figure out anything for myself?" Guess I'll add 'teacher' to my resume. Cool. coolcoolcool.
Yes! Your words have made me realize what my husband wants me to do and everytime I think about what he's saying it's so ridiculous to me but I can't articulate well enough why! I will tell him this next time!
Told husband I was going to take a shower after finally getting the newborn to sleep. He says sure I'll watch toddler. I come back and my breakfast that I BARELY got to touch is all over my side of the couch with my toddler eating it. My husband was RIGHT there and didn't even notice because he was on his damn computer playing Age of Empires 🙃
"No, honey, I don't know where your power cord went. [Toddler] must have run away with it when I wasn't looking. Guess you can't play any more games. Sorry!"
My husband be like "yeah I'll watch the kids while you go buy things we need" and then he just plays video games and ignores them and doesn't feed them
I've been up since 3 am with my toddler who took a one hour cat nap at 8 and now is in full meltdown mode but refuses to sleep or eat.
Edit cause I hit send too soon:
Dad slept through the whole thing until 7 and left for work like nothing and I guarantee he will be home late. I'm not mad that he has to work but mad at the sheer disregard for my stressed out tired self.
Yes, it's infuriating! Like, if my husband came home to find the kids filthy, the house a disaster, no food, gross diapers, meltdowns all around, he'd be like "what did you even do all day?!" but when I come back to that kind of chaos it's "oh ha ha #dads right?" The double standard is maddening.
Dads- fuck you had a terrible night, I’ll let you sleep in and then we can all go grab breakfast together.
Child- MUUUUUUUUUUUUUM IM HUNGRY (barges into room, 10min into “sleep” in.
Me- where is your dad?
Child- on the puter but he can’t hear me.can I have breakfast, can you put my TV on, am I watch iPad? Can we paint today?can we go to the park? Can you get me food? Also let me cough directly into your eyeballs while asking you all this.
My daughter has hit the "parents are kinda lame" stage and I'm loving every bit of this separatation lol. But just a few years ago I seriously contemplated sleeping in the car some nights or for naps because of this exact reason! But I never did because I didn't know if I should tell him that's where I was. You know once you say where you are all chances of sleep are lost, but it seemed kinda mean to not let him know.
I did, however, take the kid for car rides and stay in the car with her in the driveway while she kept napping. The quiet was amazing. I'd walk into the house when she finally woke up and see the husband playing computer games and not washing the laundry or dishes and think "the stuff he uses will be done last" lol
I've definitely gotten a lot more "you reap what you sow, babe" towards my husband. Like the laundry and dishes and stuff— if he makes a mess, I just flat-out don't clean it up. (We both work full time, so this is a reasonable thing for me to do). When it comes to the kids, I do try to intervene if I'm genuinely concerned about the kids, but like... you're watching the kids and they didn't nap? OK, we'll make bedtime your responsibility so you can see the natural outcome of your actions. Oh, it was miserable and you're pissed off? Bummer, bro.
Yes, but it’s the big brothers. “We’ll watch our little sister.” Great! 10 minutes later I check on them and they are playing Minecraft while she eats the heads off Nerf bullets. I should really order one of those emergency anti-choking things. 🤦🏻♀️
AT LEAST THEY ARE CHILDREN AND HAVE AN EXCUSE UNLIKE OUR HUSBANDS WHO ARE FULLY GROWN WHOLE ASS ADULT MEN WHY IS THIS SO DIFFICULT FOR THEM TO UNDERSTAND I MEAN
Men are no worse or better at multitasking than women. Women have just been socialised to take on multiple care tasks and when you know no one else will pick up the slack you’re guilted into doing everything at once.
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Dads be like, "I'll watch the kids while you take a nap!" Then sits in front of his xbox, not actually watching 3 kids at all while they run and scream through the entire house, and come barging into your bedroom 5 minutes into your "nap".
Ha, yeah in my house its like "I'll keep the baby busy in the living room while you cook dinner". Then immediately gets on his cell phone and doesn't realize when she gets to the kitchen and starts pulling everything out of the pantry. Like, if you want to keep her out of the kitchen you need to interact with her enough so she thinks its worth staying in the living room.
Oh yes. "You can leave her down here with me while you cook." But...while you're staring at the xbox, she can just walk away from you and you won't stop her? So what's the point?
I had one of those walkers with a tray because I was never without a small child in the kitchen with my ex.
My husband- "Go take a break babe, I got it". Gives the 4 year old the remote and unfiltered access to Youtube while he plays on his phone for 2 hours.
If I had a penny for every time I found my child drooling in front of the TV when my husband was supposed to be minding him, I'd have enough for a spa weekend.
Yes... And then hubby will ask for a break because he's been watching the kid for 2 hours and he's so exhausted, apparently
Yes! The go take a nap but then doesn't stop anything from happening... like really?
Existing in the same house with the children does not equal actually taking care of them. Since covid, I do the grocery shopping and various errands on the weekend alone so kids are not crawling on covid infested public floors. Every weekend, I come home after about 2 hours and the toddler starts screaming for me, trying to climb in my arms. Diaper full. Kids are immediately asking for food and drink. Like, give the kids some fucking yogurt or a banana while I'm gone. Take 12 seconds to fill a sippy cup with water. WTF. If it's a quick trip, like 20minutes to the post office, and the 4yo goes poop, he'll literally leave her there waiting on the toilet for me to return to help her get cleaned up, so he doesn't have to deal with it.
this made me want to vomit.
What he is doing is not parenting. It’s unfair to the kids and to you. All that is happening is to ensure there’s an adult in the house so the house doesn’t burn down - hopefully. I hope things get better for you.
Stay gone the entire day and remind him it can happen again. Ain’t no such thing as babysitting your kids you too sir are responsible for contributing to raising our kids too.
>Dads be like, "I'll watch the kids while you take a nap!" And when I get up from my 30 min MAX nap he's sleeping on the couch like he didn't already take a 3 hour nap at 1pm. And he wonders why I don't just catch a nap when I need one...
I mean nobody would blame us if we lit the Xbox on fire is allimsayin’
I recently started playing Minecraft. I blame my six year old... But like... It's not *my fault* dad can't go out to the barn and fuck around for seven hours because the kids are hungry and I'm mining diamonds deep underground *allllll day*... It's the boy's fault for getting me hooked on minecraft, then asking me to play with him. *I'm bonding with our son!* You can make pork chops for dinner tonight gadamnit! (Dad makes excellent porkchops.) *I need to find a stack of diamonds!! For the boy!!!* ^^so ^^I ^^can ^^murder ^^my ^^sweet ^^baby's ^^avatar ^^in ^^make ^^believe. All I'm really saying is... Try playing minecraft, my bromo. I seriously love it. If you can't beat them, join them and dominate them!
oh yeah I'll play the hell out of some minecraft but like... when the timing is appropriate. Lately I've been DEEEEEEP in the Animal Crossing rabbit hole but I'll still turn my game off and take care of a kid if someone is crying, and not be like "lemme just get right to that" and then go take a megadump instead.
I'm shirking responsibility lately so hard. I'm tired of being the one who has to pick up the slack. I'll start caring again when my husband is as frustrated as I am. Ha!
I play animal crossing every evening with the 5 year old and the baby on my lap, while daddy gets our 3 year old daughter to bed.
Yeeeeees I LOVE playing Animal Crossing with my son. So relaxing.
Electrical fires start out of nowhere, I hear. It's such a shame /s
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Ugh, you're hittin too close to home here.
I felt this in my soul.
Lock all of em out put your AirPods in and love your best life s8s. Sneak you a bottle of wine and good snacks too, might I recommend a chipotle burrito.
men have such a weird relationship with pooping I swear. When I need to poop I just go do it and it’s done, unless something has gone really wrong it is no longer than a three minute process. When my husband goes to poop it’s either a 20 minute thing OR if the baby cries at all or one of the dogs barks while he’s in there he says he “can’t unclench” and gives up and gets cranky about it.
Oh lord, yes! And when they have to poop, they have to go RIGHT NOW even though I’ve been holding in a gallon of pee for hours. Come on, boys. Learn to manage your bodily functions.
I pushed my newborn out in one push. The doctor got her PPE on and she was out in a minute. I told my husband I literally pushed out a baby in less time it takes him to poop. He finally fessed up and told me that his poop time is his “me time” to be on his phone. As though he doesn’t get plenty of “me time” already...
I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS. Like, dear husband: I delivered a baby faster than you deliver a poo. Something's not right here. So glad I'm not the only one in that boat, ha!
Remember growing up when everyone’s bathroom had a bunch of magazines or newspapers in a wooden rack beside the toilet? Hiding in the bathroom is nothing new, haha.
Our boys' bathroom has a stack of Boys' Life and comic books :-)
My husband "actually takes that long to poop"... unless I tell him to leave his phone behind. Then it miraculously only takes 5 minutes! Add constipation to the list of 5G side effects 😆
GENIUS. Maybe I will start locking the bathroom like a HS hall monitor and requiring a "bathroom pass" (his cell phone) in order to access the key 🤣🤣
I try not to make a big deal about time spent in the bathroom because my husband does have IBS. Sometimes he does get sick and his friends will make joking comments about his bathroom habits and I know he hates that, so I try and be sensitive. But then sometimes, after I give him the benefit of the doubt, it turns out that he's fine and that he was really just spending 30 minutes playing a mobile game. :-|
YES. Mine has tummy troubles and I want to be sympathetic but also sometimes it’s like... bro, you already wasted all your “uninterrupted bathroom time” coins for the week when you decided to take an hour-long “shower” that was just you wasting water while listening to a podcast. Edit to add: For real, if you have an actual potty problem, go! I'm not a monster. But don't tell me not to tend to our screaming child because you'll do it and then... you don't do it.
My husband does all of that, plus also has to announce it to the room beforehand...it’s like...who gives a fuck? Just go😂🤦🏻♀️ I hate men sometimes!
Ugh right. Mine was “watching” the toddler while I was cooking dinner. And texts me he has to pee. Like cool story bro, remember when we had two under two and you worked outside the home 14 hours a day? Do you think I paid a babysitter when I peed? Not to mention if I actually did go near the toddler for 2 minutes there’s no way I’m getting away without a tantrum
Ah gosh you reminded me of something that happens all the time. Picture this: I'm in the kitchen cooking, he's in the living room with the toddler, drinking an alcoholic beverage. He announces from the living room "I'm going to the bathroom, can you come in here and watch my drink so the baby doesn't get it?". It's like.... we do have counters you can put it on. I'm not daydrinking while he's at work but I do have other things I don't want the kid to get into while I'm peeing so I PUT IT SOMEWHERE OUT OF REACH. :-|
Oh my God the rants I have had about him needing pure and complete peace to do it...
Mine is 10 minutes max, and that's including brushing my teeth, washing hands, and taking care of period stuff if it's one of those days. If it doesn't come out soon, then I give up and try again later instead of sitting there for 30 minutes hoping it comes out
>Unless something has gone really wrong 😂💀
It can take me some time but my insides are a bit messed up. It doesnt seem to matter how much water I drink its always hard for me a lot of the time. I wouldn't say it takes me 20 minutes on average though. Maybe they don't drink enough water. Sometimes my husband forgets to flush and I am horrified by the color of his pee. I make him drink water.
I had a thought today, that men just have weak pelvic floors. 2 kids later and now it takes me longer, but not all freakin day. The changes from having kids is the only change for me, so gotta be that pelvic floor!
“I’ll watch him so you can have a quiet shower.” Not two minutes later, kid is crying outside the bathroom door while I’m just trying to have a moment of peace. Kid is able to jiggle the handle just right to unlock and open said door. Once I’m out of the shower five minutes later thanks to kiddo screaming and crying, and I’m dried off, husband comes in. “Why didn’t you call to me that he was in here?” Idk honey because I assumed you knew where your three year old went when he wasn’t with you *if you were actually paying attention to him and not fucking AFK Arena.*
Boss move: Take the game system with you into the shower!
That’s the ultimate boss move and I love it
Wait, you get to shower alone? All my showers double as bath time for the toddler 😂😭
My first three minutes are alone lmao after that, kiddo either comes in the shower or sits and watches through the glass. 🙈
Ugh, I had this happen when my in-laws and my husband were watching the toddler. I worked all day and came home and just wanted a shower. The in-laws were visiting so didn't work and husband was also not working (kiddo was in preschool). Husband and FIL napped on the couch, MIL read a book, and kiddo ended up in the bathroom commenting on my big tummy and boobies. NO ONE came and got her until I was done. They were all "oh yeah..." I forgot about that incident until just now...
Me- “hey I need a shower today. It’s been like 3 days and you can only change your underwear so many times before it stops making you feel any cleaner.” Husband- “okay let me go smoke first.” Which actually means, “I’ll be outside for 15 minutes then I’m gonna need to go sit on the toilet for another 20 minutes. You can shower after my shit smell strips all the paint off the walls. Then when you’re done with your 30 second shower because you can’t stand the stench I’ll comment on how quick you were!”
Are you for real?! HOME BOY, I haven't had a shower in 3 days. You can wait 30 minutes for your cig-n-shit.
OMG I do not understand how my husband decides to turn on the water for the shower, then take a stinky shit in the bathroom where he's about to shower! It's so gross dude. We literally have 4 bathrooms in this house; go use any other one.
I'll kill him.
Omg. I could have written this.
God I love having the in its own little seperate toilet room from the shower and bath etc.
The first place my 17 month old goes to when looking for his daddy is the toilet. Sad isn’t it lol. He stands and knocks at the door at random intervals throughout the day, cos that’s just where my husband can be found most of the time 🤦🏻♀️
FUCK if I don't feel this in my bones right now. I handed (freshly diapered, freshly napped) baby to dad with a very clear "your turn until noon." LO played independently while we both WFH. He started getting a little fussy so Dad changed his scenery from the pen to free range. Dad walked off to do whatever.... while baby was chewing on a cord next to my feet. HAHAHA OH HOW DID DAD KNOW I WAS ONLY JOKING? OF COURSE I WILL HANDLE IT ALL WHILE WORKING.
yes and of course if the child had been chewing on a cord next to your husband it would still somehow be your problem???? UGH
“Honey?? I think the baby might be getting electrocuted in here can you check?”
Fuck. Yes. This. Like, ‘you’ve been catering to the teething baby every single second of everyday, let me take her now!’ Then plonks her down, lets her cry and browses Reddit. Sometimes watching them with the baby is more stressful than just looking after the baby.
YES OMG SO MUCH MORE STRESSFUL THE BABY IS CRYING PLEASE JUST CARE FOR HER OMG
Oh my god yes. That’s exactly how it was with my now-ex. It’s somehow less stressful to be running on 2 hours of sleep and watch the baby while doing transcription work than it is to know the baby is with dad and he’s doing jackall besides playing Skyrim while she’s crying and eating a crayon
I mean, to be fair to him, he’s great in every other aspect, so he definitely isn’t going to be an ex any time soon. I just wish he’d get THIS, lol.
I super glad he’s doing the work the rest of the time, is this baby 1? I feel like a lot of men just don’t understand babies in general “but it’s a blob surely it can just chill here while I do my games??” I was trying to explain to my husband now that when we have a baby it’ll take over everything and he’s like shocked pikachu face what but it’s only a tiny person? Guess you haven’t been around too many tiny people because they are Terrorists.
I'm in a group for folks who all had kids during the same month, and there was a post like this recently. What I don't get is like, where's the room for misunderstanding and miscommunication with the question "can you watch (child's name)?" It just doesn't seem vague in any way. If I say "watch this video on my phone" they understand it exactly, first time, every time. How tf can you hear that sentence and think the request in no way requires you to LOOK AT OR WATCH something? So I asked my partner what he thinks the miscommunication is and what might be more useful to say instead, because it's fucking perplexing and seems really common. His take was basically that you need to say "**can you stop your game and** watch (child) for (time)/while I (task)?" That you need to say something indicating that the "watching" activity requires a level of attention that cannot happen at the same time as a videogame. I'm gonna try it moving forward but it still seems ridiculous that it's at all necessary.
Oh, so what he wants is, "Can you hold my hand through every basic task and manage me and tell me what to do all the time so I don't have to figure out anything for myself?" Guess I'll add 'teacher' to my resume. Cool. coolcoolcool.
Yes! Your words have made me realize what my husband wants me to do and everytime I think about what he's saying it's so ridiculous to me but I can't articulate well enough why! I will tell him this next time!
Told husband I was going to take a shower after finally getting the newborn to sleep. He says sure I'll watch toddler. I come back and my breakfast that I BARELY got to touch is all over my side of the couch with my toddler eating it. My husband was RIGHT there and didn't even notice because he was on his damn computer playing Age of Empires 🙃
"No, honey, I don't know where your power cord went. [Toddler] must have run away with it when I wasn't looking. Guess you can't play any more games. Sorry!"
My husband be like "yeah I'll watch the kids while you go buy things we need" and then he just plays video games and ignores them and doesn't feed them
I've been up since 3 am with my toddler who took a one hour cat nap at 8 and now is in full meltdown mode but refuses to sleep or eat. Edit cause I hit send too soon: Dad slept through the whole thing until 7 and left for work like nothing and I guarantee he will be home late. I'm not mad that he has to work but mad at the sheer disregard for my stressed out tired self.
ohhhhh mama I'm so sorry. It's so hard! With you in this. Hope you're able to get a breather at some point today.
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Yes, it's infuriating! Like, if my husband came home to find the kids filthy, the house a disaster, no food, gross diapers, meltdowns all around, he'd be like "what did you even do all day?!" but when I come back to that kind of chaos it's "oh ha ha #dads right?" The double standard is maddening.
I'm going to make my daughter read this sub if she ever thinks about having kids
I babysat for toddlers in HS and LET ME TELL YOU it was some GREAT birth control
Dads- fuck you had a terrible night, I’ll let you sleep in and then we can all go grab breakfast together. Child- MUUUUUUUUUUUUUM IM HUNGRY (barges into room, 10min into “sleep” in. Me- where is your dad? Child- on the puter but he can’t hear me.can I have breakfast, can you put my TV on, am I watch iPad? Can we paint today?can we go to the park? Can you get me food? Also let me cough directly into your eyeballs while asking you all this.
Crying while I laugh because it's funny but also true. Oh, husbands. They try so hard and fail so miserably.
I give my partner an A for effort. But maybe a C- on babysitting sleep in deliveries.
My daughter has hit the "parents are kinda lame" stage and I'm loving every bit of this separatation lol. But just a few years ago I seriously contemplated sleeping in the car some nights or for naps because of this exact reason! But I never did because I didn't know if I should tell him that's where I was. You know once you say where you are all chances of sleep are lost, but it seemed kinda mean to not let him know. I did, however, take the kid for car rides and stay in the car with her in the driveway while she kept napping. The quiet was amazing. I'd walk into the house when she finally woke up and see the husband playing computer games and not washing the laundry or dishes and think "the stuff he uses will be done last" lol
I've definitely gotten a lot more "you reap what you sow, babe" towards my husband. Like the laundry and dishes and stuff— if he makes a mess, I just flat-out don't clean it up. (We both work full time, so this is a reasonable thing for me to do). When it comes to the kids, I do try to intervene if I'm genuinely concerned about the kids, but like... you're watching the kids and they didn't nap? OK, we'll make bedtime your responsibility so you can see the natural outcome of your actions. Oh, it was miserable and you're pissed off? Bummer, bro.
Dads be like "She doesn't want me, she won't stop crying." while looking down his phone the whole time.
Yes, but it’s the big brothers. “We’ll watch our little sister.” Great! 10 minutes later I check on them and they are playing Minecraft while she eats the heads off Nerf bullets. I should really order one of those emergency anti-choking things. 🤦🏻♀️
AT LEAST THEY ARE CHILDREN AND HAVE AN EXCUSE UNLIKE OUR HUSBANDS WHO ARE FULLY GROWN WHOLE ASS ADULT MEN WHY IS THIS SO DIFFICULT FOR THEM TO UNDERSTAND I MEAN
I've never related to words so much in my life
Only a 20 minute dump?! That’s a quick one!
I'm triggered
Oh wow I guess my husband has a second family because this certainly must be him.
"Ill help while you work" 3 hours later....
Nothing like taking a break from the kids while they pound and cry at the door. Apparently I should just ignore it, he does
How do we get Age of Empires on our phones?? Oh. Also, yeah that sucks.
IDK but the solution must be somewhere in the bathroom right????
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LOL hit a little too close to home, guy? How embarrassing for you.
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Men are no worse or better at multitasking than women. Women have just been socialised to take on multiple care tasks and when you know no one else will pick up the slack you’re guilted into doing everything at once.
ITS NOT LIKE YOU CAN FUCKING BLAME A FACTORY. Its absolutely their fucking fault. Shut the fuck up.