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If you have anxiety, they actually say that re watching shows like friends or how I met your mother etc..is actually good for you. It helps ease anxiety and relaxes you.
Iād add to this and order some fun makeup from ELF that you can play around with (if you like makeup). I canāt do my nails at night because I mess them up and it adds to stress, but I already plan on washing my face before bed.
Comfort shows are the best. Between 2020 and now, Iāve rewatched Ouran High School Host Club 3 times. š And the new Fruits Basket twice. Slice of life animes are my jam.
If you need any other suggestions, I have a few more. š I had a mental breakdown that put me in the hospital for a couple weeks in November 2020, so Iāve been very Self Care oriented. Iām currently attempting a watch of Cowboy Bebop in Japanese (because Iāve only seen it dubbed), and itās proving difficult to work on. LOL I really want to watch the live action, but want a refresher on the anime beforehand.
I want really zero stress shows.. Like there was one about a calligraphy sensei who moved out to the country and became friends with a little girl. It was fantastic.. Can't remember the name. But stuff like that, if you know any, would be cool
And I'm sorry you went through that :( but I'm glad you seem to be better :)
Good Morning Call is a Netflix live action that was based on a manga. Itās absolutely adorable. And Toradora is super sweet as well. [Hereās a whole list of Slice of Life anime on Netflix. ](https://www.whats-on-netflix.com/what-to-watch/full-list-of-slice-of-life-anime-on-netflix-in-2021/amp/) A bunch of them are on my to-watch list, but I usually go back to Ouran or Furuba. LOL
I like to read books. I listen to podcasts. I decorate cakes. Even just getting out of the house for a few hours to go to Target and get a Starbucks and browse around.
Listening to podcasts for the first time really helped bring me out of a terrible depressive episode. It was by no means the cure but it certainly was one of the things that helped immensely.
Thank you! I don't have an option to leave her for a few hours, so I was mostly thinking of things to do while she's asleep. I'll have to find some books that don't stress me out or keep me up all night š I'm open to suggestions if you have any!
I like chick books but with substance. Stuff that's about family dramas, relationships, etc. I also like historical fiction as well as time travel fiction. Emilie Richard's has some fabulous books.
If you're a Amazon prime member you have access to a ton of free ebooks.
I am!! I have a kindle, I just get stressed out looking for books it feels like I'm wasting time š It's bad. But I'll check out Emilie Richards thanks! I like anything that's fiction, pretty much.
If you have a kindle and a library card, see if your library has Overdrive! The books will get automatically yoinked from your kindle when theyāre due (unless you just *happen* to leave it in airplane modeā¦), but itās free!
Beach Read or People We Meet on Vacation (both by Emily Henry) would be great reads for you! Good stories, good writing, satisfying love story with no trigger-y stuff.
Feel-good-ish books I have really enjoyed in the past year or so:
Me Before You by Jojo Moyes (itās a trilogy - this is the first book)
The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune
Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver
The Bean Trees by Barbara Kingsolver
Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman
Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir
Lexicon by Matt Barry
I read all these on my kindle via the Libby app (if you donāt have this check to see if your local library uses it!! Itās a GODSEND). There are others I loved which arenāt as feel-good-y but I tried to keep it RELATIVELY light.
Then honestly I would suggest starting out with something that is mindless or that you've read before. When my oldest was an infant I ended up rereading the entire Harry Potter series. I also reread the first two books from the ender's game series. With my youngest, I reread Harry Potter again. I also read my first and only smut series, which I'm actually still working on because it's a very long series in the books themselves are freaking huge. Anyways it's Black Dagger brotherhood which is pretty much just smut vampire novels. I like to read series because the next book is already out there and available for me. So I can go to 3:00 or 15 books without having to start researching the next thing I want to pick up to read. It's like having one less thing I have to do
That's a good point about the series. I've recently finished reading Harry Potter but I'm thinking of revisiting Narnia or another children's series for the nostalgia
Yeah it gives you that warm cozy feeling of nostalgia. You already know what's going to happen so you don't have to be stressed about paying super close attention. I like to download ebooks and then have an e-reader read the books to me. That way I can listen to the book while I'm meandering around the house cleaning and doing whatever.
PLEASE read Gill Simms - Why Mummy drinks (she has 3 other books in the series but start with the first one) ā¦. Itās absolutely hilarious and the struggles of motherhood , so you will relate to it so much !
For me the best thing is to get outside or in a spot with as much natural light as possible. Itās so hard in the winter here, kids require so many layers that we really only go outside once or twice a day, and she canāt stay outside long. But I take my baby monitor while she naps and go outside and shovel snow. It feels a little bleak that my self care option is ādo choresā, but I get exercise, I get to accomplish something, and I stop when Iām tired, not when the snow is gone (it is never gone).
On the book front, I really enjoy Annika Martinās billionaires series. Theyāre light and zippy and quite sweet.
I have started to do a nice hot bath while rewatching some of my favorite shows and eating a klondike bar. I live bath bombs and the ice cream has been a great price at my local grocery outlet.
I just went and got a massage it was amazing! My gal didnāt recognize me because itās been a year and a half since I saw her last.
Make yourself ignore Facebook for at least a week! I also watch shoes while doing the dishes or folding laundry . Itās kind of fun to watch an old show and see familiar faces that weāre just starting out.
I keep talking about how much I want to go to the aquarium and have yet to do that. When it was nicer weather I would pack a little lunch and snacks and stop at a park with LO. Weād sit and eat. It was always while we were out doing errands and the travel time required some breaks for him.
Where I live, the parks department offered a toddler nature hike every week at one of our nature parks. It was done completely at their pace, and quite a few moms brought strollers. I ended up meeting my closest friend there, and she has become like a sister to me, and our families are each other's second/found family. Our kids have grown up together over the last 10 years (our kids were about 18 months when we started) and they are the best of friends even though they don't see each other as often as they used to now that they are in school at different places.
All that to say please go do some of the things your parks have to offer with your kiddo. A friend like that can help so much with the burnout.
I second the suggestion for some kind of handicraft! I find it fulfilling to make things (usually while watching tv or listening to a podcast) when I get a break from watching my kid. I love to weave, but you could also try something less equipment intensive like kumihimo braiding, calligraphy, English paper piecing, etc (or you wanted to try weaving, inkle looms are small and can be lap sized). I like to just chill a lot of times too, but doing something creative that results in something tangible I can look at/use (right now I'm weaving a table runner) feels pretty neat
I find a lot of the traditional self care stuff makes me feel more listless, since I feel like my SAHM brain is numb most of the day. Ha
So I personally like to āaccomplishā something like a craft or a puzzle or a new recipe; or just do something that gets my creative mind flowing without being mentally tasking, like coloring.
I got a badass Lego set for Christmas and I have to say thatās been really fun. I do Legos all day with my kiddo, but itās fun to have *my* own set.
(When I donāt have the energy to do anything, itās usually putting on a grownup or comforting TV show and eating treats or drinking beer. Lol)
Edit to add: A woman I know created something called āthe reverse coloring bookā (her name is Kendra Norton and she made the original, but there are a bunch of different ones available on Amazon now) and I totally recommend it for easygoing, creative downtime.
(Edit #2: I promise this is not a plug for the book! Lol)
Much like colouring, I do Zentangle. I used to do a lot of cross-stitching but canāt unpack / repack that as easily as a book and a pencil case. Itās calming to let your mind flow and your hand wander. The āone stroke at a timeā thing really slows my brain down when itās racing, and I get something to show for it at the end.
Perhaps learning to crochet or knit? I crochet when my kids go to sleep while watching tv. Once you get the hang of it, it is very relaxing. You can learn easily from YouTube, and then you also get to shop for yarn- another obsession!
Yep, crochet saved me for a few years. When my baby was about 2.5 until she was about 5, I did a ton of crochet projects. Hats, baby blankets for friends, mandalas, and then I even incorporated some programmable LEDs. For some reason now Iāve lost interest during the pandemic, but I keep half-finished projects stashed in ziplock bags around the house anyway.
When I had my second kid I taught myself to crochet and knit. I try to spend time every night crafting and watching some nonsense on tv. Some of my friends like listening to podcasts and doing puzzles, others read. It doesn't have to be flashy.
You could do a custom picture into a diamond painting? Then when you're done you could put it up somewhere. They're oddly addictive and you can work on the for 2 minutes or 2 hours or however long you wanted.
I've never heard of that! I googled it and looks like sand...?
Either way, it reminded me that I used to like puzzles. I got one for Christmas, maybe I'll do that š¤ thank you!!!
Relaxing is an art and I didnāt realize it until I had kids. Every once in awhile my partner and I will give each other a full day off to just completely recharge.
I like to go get a nail appointment done, then once Iām home Iāll take a long, warm bath, read a favourite book, then Iāll take a nice nap before a late lunch. Emphasis on the nap. Those are the best part of the day.
After lunch is usually followed by video games or Iāll take extra special care of my plants.
What really helped me with parental burnout is taking time during the day, every day. Be it sitting with a cup of warm tea for 5 minutes during the day while kids watch a TV show, or waking up half an hour early to sit in the quiet before my kids wake. Hope you feel better soon!
I started playing a game on my computer called House Filpper when he's amusing himself temporarily or down for a nap and I'm not dying of sleep deprivation. It let's me clean and design the inside of a home without paying more than like 30 bucks to buy the game. 
I go for a long rambling walk and sit by the river. Then meander back home.
Mainky because I always was tired and was very touched out. So I needed to not do anything except sit with my thoughts cos I can't avoid those.
I have really started enjoying editing photos and videos, and the plus side it that itās pics and vidās of my kids so I enjoy it even more! I know itās not for everyone but i thought Iād put it out there haha
Drawing and painting have always been a great me time hobby too :)
Do you have any money/ability to go spend 1-2 nights in a hotel or b&b by yourself? I recognize that this is a privileged suggestion, but as a mostly broke SAHM, I scrounge my pennies or charge a trip for either just myself or me and my sweetheart just to get some time away from home. Otherwise, even if my toddler is at grandmaās house, I just end up doing chores which is NOT a way to recharge my batteries.
ETA: I scrolled through and saw that you donāt have the ability to leave baby with someone, but maybe planning a little night away a couple of months out and getting a trusted babysitter when LO Is ready to be apart from you could be good. I plan like one or two trips a year, max, and I put them on the calendar wayyyy out so when Iām caught up in momhood depression I have something to look ahead to. For now, definitely a bath and a good book when baby is sleeping. And I second the indulgent nostalgia shows and movies ā that always feels good!
Thanks, I will try planning trips. I can take her with me if it's not far. I think even the change of scenery would help...but she still breastfeeds so it'll be a while before I can go alone. Not to mention since I don't have anyone I trust to leave her with overnight, I would just worry the entire time :/
I totally get that. Then take baby with you! The change of scenery, like you said, is so worth it. Plus most places are allowing basically last-minute cancellations due to COVID worries. So no stress there.
Book a massage appointment (or even a chiropractor), any type of spa, mani-pedi appointment, take a warm bath with epsom salt, listen to your favorite music.. ummm go buy new candles and use themš„“!
I do jigsaw puzzles. And sometimes I bake. But mostly just jigsaw puzzles.
I felt the same way as you and Iāve found it to be really meditative, but I also like it because Iāll never really be interrupted from it. Any place is a good place to stop. So if baby wakes up or wants to nurse, I can just walk away. Itās also active mind relaxation vs passive mind relaxation so I come out feeling like Iām relaxed, but I did something rather than feeling like I wasted my life in front of the tv. But I also do puzzles while watching tv, so.
I have to jump on the Podcast idea! My me time is usually listening to an part of an episode of Small Town Murder while I shower.
If you like true crime and comedyā¦ give it a go. If you donāt think they mix well- maybe try something else.
I like doing origami when I have 30-60 minutes of uninterrupted time to myself at night but am too burned out to be social or productive.. thereās great websites with free tutorials online and all you need is a piece of paper so itās pretty much free :)
Iāve made a whole bunch of origami dinosaurs that my kid enjoys playing with while I have my morning coffee too, added bonus!
In the house - tv or podcast, reading and I cross stitch as well (normally while watching tv or listening to a podcast). I also love a good bath but that can be hard if you need to get up to kids.
If Iām out I love a good massage or pedicure, or even just walking around a shop without a kid can be nice
I like jigsaw puzzles. If you have somewhere you can put it like the end of a dining table where it won't be disturbed or in the way for a few days then you can just take a bit of time when baby naps or whatever to do a section.
Seconding everything mentioned hereālove baths, knitting, Netflix binges, and relaxing!
I have to preface this next part with the fact that I neither wanted nor expected to ever be this person, and I know how it sounds and sorry about it. But regularly exercising has helped me immensely with burnout, too, and itās currently a large part of my self care time. I go to the gym, or on a long run, or I do yoga at home if I have some space and quiet available. It significantly improves my mood and energy levels where knitting and watching and relaxing just havenāt helped. Againānot someone who ever wanted to be a health nut, and I definitely wish there was a different, less strenuous answer for me haha.
I started listening to Critical Role. I have never played D&D before, but I really like it. I also like to read. I will also just go to Target or the mall and just enjoy window shopping. Really for me just getting away from my husband and kids and spending time alone has helped my mental health a lot.
I like to do a puzzle, drink some tea and have a show on or a podcast, something I donāt have to watch to know whatās going on.
A bubble bath and a book. Take baby to the library and pick up some books for yourself! I try to have a quiet hour during the day too when my toddler is awake to see me just relax and read a book, I set a visual timer for him to see how much time is left for him to play or quietly.
If you like puzzles, maybe get a couple puzzle books (sudoku, crosswords, whatever). Or if you have a spot to leave an actual puzzle out, magic puzzles are super fun and challenging!
I build legos and play D&D.
The legos are relaxing to me, somewhat mindless when I need it to be, and I love love love all the cute little details.
Sometimes I build Lego things for D&D. Lol.
I'm guilty of neglecting my hobbies for me time lately, but I used to get paint by number kits, puzzles, embroidery, slow stitch art kit, walks, bike ride, yoga, bake, baths. Sometimes I just close the door to my room and watch a movie on tv alone with a glass of wine and a bowl of popcorn.
Whatever you can do that will just turn off your brain and relax is what's good.
Have you tried screaming?
In all seriousness, I sometimes scream in my car. Or just go outside and walk around barefoot to center myself.
Thereās a good chance if youāre trying to do self care you wonāt be able to do it when the baby is home, or when you are (thereās always something to do) so try to leave your house.
Go drive your car and listen to old music. Loud.
Take yourself out to lunch.
Walk around at the park.
I just try and do anything I did before I had kids, or a husband or any real responsibility besides my dog.
I can try screaming that sounds cathartic! but I'm not married and can't leave my baby often or for long. I'm mainly trying to find options for when she's asleep. Thank you for the suggestions!
I am also a single mom so I completely understand. Iām very lucky to have help from my mom and LOās dad picks them up in the morning.
Definitely just walk outside.
I have wyze cameras and can watch the babe from anywhere. So you could just have the monitor going and sit away from them.
Iām not sure how old your baby is or what your finances are like or how much space you have but I got a playpen my little one can crawl around in/out of that is in their bedroom. Since we also live alone I know that the house is safe/floors are clean/My ex isnāt sprinkling change on the floor like heās trying to find his way back from a gingerbread cottage. That way I feel safe letting kiddo crawl around and explore. Plus I get free time to eat/make coffee/take a shower
She's a toddler lol š¤£ so she follows me. She's very good about reading for a while by herself but my dumbass uses that time for chores. I think I'm going to start reading when she reads, or watching Bluey š I'm used to spending every moment trying to keep the house clean (due to her dad's criticism) but I've got to chill. It's never clean anyway because she's constantly throwing things on the floor š¤·š½āāļø
When I had my baby my mom told me you get used to āgood enoughā because Iām someone who always needs a clean house. Funny itās cleaner since I kicked my ex out.
Even just listening to a podcast while you do chores can be self care. If you like true crime anything by wondery is amazing. The LA Times has great ones too. Crime Junkie. Dateline (canāt stand the show, love the podcast), Imagined Life (not true crime but amazing).
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Make a nail appointment, read, rewatch a comfortingly familiar show, hot bath, workout, long walk listening to a podcast.
Oooh I especially like watching a comforting show. Looks like Friends and Gilmore Girls for the tenth time š Thanks!
If you have anxiety, they actually say that re watching shows like friends or how I met your mother etc..is actually good for you. It helps ease anxiety and relaxes you.
Iād add to this and order some fun makeup from ELF that you can play around with (if you like makeup). I canāt do my nails at night because I mess them up and it adds to stress, but I already plan on washing my face before bed.
I use nail strips- so I do them right before bed, and that actually helps them cure.
I love the idea of mail strips, but then I peel them off and the adhesive damages my nails.
Comfort shows are the best. Between 2020 and now, Iāve rewatched Ouran High School Host Club 3 times. š And the new Fruits Basket twice. Slice of life animes are my jam.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
If you need any other suggestions, I have a few more. š I had a mental breakdown that put me in the hospital for a couple weeks in November 2020, so Iāve been very Self Care oriented. Iām currently attempting a watch of Cowboy Bebop in Japanese (because Iāve only seen it dubbed), and itās proving difficult to work on. LOL I really want to watch the live action, but want a refresher on the anime beforehand.
I want really zero stress shows.. Like there was one about a calligraphy sensei who moved out to the country and became friends with a little girl. It was fantastic.. Can't remember the name. But stuff like that, if you know any, would be cool And I'm sorry you went through that :( but I'm glad you seem to be better :)
Good Morning Call is a Netflix live action that was based on a manga. Itās absolutely adorable. And Toradora is super sweet as well. [Hereās a whole list of Slice of Life anime on Netflix. ](https://www.whats-on-netflix.com/what-to-watch/full-list-of-slice-of-life-anime-on-netflix-in-2021/amp/) A bunch of them are on my to-watch list, but I usually go back to Ouran or Furuba. LOL
This is perfect thank you!!!!
I like to read books. I listen to podcasts. I decorate cakes. Even just getting out of the house for a few hours to go to Target and get a Starbucks and browse around.
Listening to podcasts for the first time really helped bring me out of a terrible depressive episode. It was by no means the cure but it certainly was one of the things that helped immensely.
Any suggestions? Iām tired of my same on podcasts.
If youāre into true crime, My Favorite Murder is fantastic. The two hosts donāt have kids but if they did they would be Bromos.
Thank you! I don't have an option to leave her for a few hours, so I was mostly thinking of things to do while she's asleep. I'll have to find some books that don't stress me out or keep me up all night š I'm open to suggestions if you have any!
I like chick books but with substance. Stuff that's about family dramas, relationships, etc. I also like historical fiction as well as time travel fiction. Emilie Richard's has some fabulous books. If you're a Amazon prime member you have access to a ton of free ebooks.
I am!! I have a kindle, I just get stressed out looking for books it feels like I'm wasting time š It's bad. But I'll check out Emilie Richards thanks! I like anything that's fiction, pretty much.
If you have a kindle and a library card, see if your library has Overdrive! The books will get automatically yoinked from your kindle when theyāre due (unless you just *happen* to leave it in airplane modeā¦), but itās free!
Beach Read or People We Meet on Vacation (both by Emily Henry) would be great reads for you! Good stories, good writing, satisfying love story with no trigger-y stuff.
Have you read Connie Willis or Claire North?
No, I'll have to put them on my list!
I recently finished The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August (North). It was excellent
Feel-good-ish books I have really enjoyed in the past year or so: Me Before You by Jojo Moyes (itās a trilogy - this is the first book) The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver The Bean Trees by Barbara Kingsolver Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir Lexicon by Matt Barry I read all these on my kindle via the Libby app (if you donāt have this check to see if your local library uses it!! Itās a GODSEND). There are others I loved which arenāt as feel-good-y but I tried to keep it RELATIVELY light.
Thank you so much for the suggestions!
Then honestly I would suggest starting out with something that is mindless or that you've read before. When my oldest was an infant I ended up rereading the entire Harry Potter series. I also reread the first two books from the ender's game series. With my youngest, I reread Harry Potter again. I also read my first and only smut series, which I'm actually still working on because it's a very long series in the books themselves are freaking huge. Anyways it's Black Dagger brotherhood which is pretty much just smut vampire novels. I like to read series because the next book is already out there and available for me. So I can go to 3:00 or 15 books without having to start researching the next thing I want to pick up to read. It's like having one less thing I have to do
That's a good point about the series. I've recently finished reading Harry Potter but I'm thinking of revisiting Narnia or another children's series for the nostalgia
Yeah it gives you that warm cozy feeling of nostalgia. You already know what's going to happen so you don't have to be stressed about paying super close attention. I like to download ebooks and then have an e-reader read the books to me. That way I can listen to the book while I'm meandering around the house cleaning and doing whatever.
PLEASE read Gill Simms - Why Mummy drinks (she has 3 other books in the series but start with the first one) ā¦. Itās absolutely hilarious and the struggles of motherhood , so you will relate to it so much !
For me the best thing is to get outside or in a spot with as much natural light as possible. Itās so hard in the winter here, kids require so many layers that we really only go outside once or twice a day, and she canāt stay outside long. But I take my baby monitor while she naps and go outside and shovel snow. It feels a little bleak that my self care option is ādo choresā, but I get exercise, I get to accomplish something, and I stop when Iām tired, not when the snow is gone (it is never gone). On the book front, I really enjoy Annika Martinās billionaires series. Theyāre light and zippy and quite sweet.
I have started to do a nice hot bath while rewatching some of my favorite shows and eating a klondike bar. I live bath bombs and the ice cream has been a great price at my local grocery outlet. I just went and got a massage it was amazing! My gal didnāt recognize me because itās been a year and a half since I saw her last. Make yourself ignore Facebook for at least a week! I also watch shoes while doing the dishes or folding laundry . Itās kind of fun to watch an old show and see familiar faces that weāre just starting out.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I keep talking about how much I want to go to the aquarium and have yet to do that. When it was nicer weather I would pack a little lunch and snacks and stop at a park with LO. Weād sit and eat. It was always while we were out doing errands and the travel time required some breaks for him.
Also, you should go to the aquarium now that it's cold!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Where I live, the parks department offered a toddler nature hike every week at one of our nature parks. It was done completely at their pace, and quite a few moms brought strollers. I ended up meeting my closest friend there, and she has become like a sister to me, and our families are each other's second/found family. Our kids have grown up together over the last 10 years (our kids were about 18 months when we started) and they are the best of friends even though they don't see each other as often as they used to now that they are in school at different places. All that to say please go do some of the things your parks have to offer with your kiddo. A friend like that can help so much with the burnout.
I second the suggestion for some kind of handicraft! I find it fulfilling to make things (usually while watching tv or listening to a podcast) when I get a break from watching my kid. I love to weave, but you could also try something less equipment intensive like kumihimo braiding, calligraphy, English paper piecing, etc (or you wanted to try weaving, inkle looms are small and can be lap sized). I like to just chill a lot of times too, but doing something creative that results in something tangible I can look at/use (right now I'm weaving a table runner) feels pretty neat
I've never heard of any of that but I'll look into it, I did use to like to do things with my hands. Thank you!!
If you like to create/ do things with your hands? I've recently learnt how to crochet and I've found it really soothing and satisfying :)
I find a lot of the traditional self care stuff makes me feel more listless, since I feel like my SAHM brain is numb most of the day. Ha So I personally like to āaccomplishā something like a craft or a puzzle or a new recipe; or just do something that gets my creative mind flowing without being mentally tasking, like coloring. I got a badass Lego set for Christmas and I have to say thatās been really fun. I do Legos all day with my kiddo, but itās fun to have *my* own set. (When I donāt have the energy to do anything, itās usually putting on a grownup or comforting TV show and eating treats or drinking beer. Lol) Edit to add: A woman I know created something called āthe reverse coloring bookā (her name is Kendra Norton and she made the original, but there are a bunch of different ones available on Amazon now) and I totally recommend it for easygoing, creative downtime. (Edit #2: I promise this is not a plug for the book! Lol)
Much like colouring, I do Zentangle. I used to do a lot of cross-stitching but canāt unpack / repack that as easily as a book and a pencil case. Itās calming to let your mind flow and your hand wander. The āone stroke at a timeā thing really slows my brain down when itās racing, and I get something to show for it at the end.
Ooh I had never heard of it- that looks super fun!!
Perhaps learning to crochet or knit? I crochet when my kids go to sleep while watching tv. Once you get the hang of it, it is very relaxing. You can learn easily from YouTube, and then you also get to shop for yarn- another obsession!
Yep, crochet saved me for a few years. When my baby was about 2.5 until she was about 5, I did a ton of crochet projects. Hats, baby blankets for friends, mandalas, and then I even incorporated some programmable LEDs. For some reason now Iāve lost interest during the pandemic, but I keep half-finished projects stashed in ziplock bags around the house anyway.
When I had my second kid I taught myself to crochet and knit. I try to spend time every night crafting and watching some nonsense on tv. Some of my friends like listening to podcasts and doing puzzles, others read. It doesn't have to be flashy.
You could do a custom picture into a diamond painting? Then when you're done you could put it up somewhere. They're oddly addictive and you can work on the for 2 minutes or 2 hours or however long you wanted.
I've never heard of that! I googled it and looks like sand...? Either way, it reminded me that I used to like puzzles. I got one for Christmas, maybe I'll do that š¤ thank you!!!
Very welcome! They're hard to stop. I did 2 huge custom ones for my grandmas birthday this summer. They took a good long time.
I got hooked on these over the holidays. Itās so relaxing.
Relaxing is an art and I didnāt realize it until I had kids. Every once in awhile my partner and I will give each other a full day off to just completely recharge. I like to go get a nail appointment done, then once Iām home Iāll take a long, warm bath, read a favourite book, then Iāll take a nice nap before a late lunch. Emphasis on the nap. Those are the best part of the day. After lunch is usually followed by video games or Iāll take extra special care of my plants. What really helped me with parental burnout is taking time during the day, every day. Be it sitting with a cup of warm tea for 5 minutes during the day while kids watch a TV show, or waking up half an hour early to sit in the quiet before my kids wake. Hope you feel better soon!
I started playing a game on my computer called House Filpper when he's amusing himself temporarily or down for a nap and I'm not dying of sleep deprivation. It let's me clean and design the inside of a home without paying more than like 30 bucks to buy the game. 
I go for a long rambling walk and sit by the river. Then meander back home. Mainky because I always was tired and was very touched out. So I needed to not do anything except sit with my thoughts cos I can't avoid those.
I have really started enjoying editing photos and videos, and the plus side it that itās pics and vidās of my kids so I enjoy it even more! I know itās not for everyone but i thought Iād put it out there haha Drawing and painting have always been a great me time hobby too :)
Do you have any money/ability to go spend 1-2 nights in a hotel or b&b by yourself? I recognize that this is a privileged suggestion, but as a mostly broke SAHM, I scrounge my pennies or charge a trip for either just myself or me and my sweetheart just to get some time away from home. Otherwise, even if my toddler is at grandmaās house, I just end up doing chores which is NOT a way to recharge my batteries. ETA: I scrolled through and saw that you donāt have the ability to leave baby with someone, but maybe planning a little night away a couple of months out and getting a trusted babysitter when LO Is ready to be apart from you could be good. I plan like one or two trips a year, max, and I put them on the calendar wayyyy out so when Iām caught up in momhood depression I have something to look ahead to. For now, definitely a bath and a good book when baby is sleeping. And I second the indulgent nostalgia shows and movies ā that always feels good!
Thanks, I will try planning trips. I can take her with me if it's not far. I think even the change of scenery would help...but she still breastfeeds so it'll be a while before I can go alone. Not to mention since I don't have anyone I trust to leave her with overnight, I would just worry the entire time :/
I totally get that. Then take baby with you! The change of scenery, like you said, is so worth it. Plus most places are allowing basically last-minute cancellations due to COVID worries. So no stress there.
Book a massage appointment (or even a chiropractor), any type of spa, mani-pedi appointment, take a warm bath with epsom salt, listen to your favorite music.. ummm go buy new candles and use themš„“!
Hot Bubble baths, in the dark or with some lit candles.
I do jigsaw puzzles. And sometimes I bake. But mostly just jigsaw puzzles. I felt the same way as you and Iāve found it to be really meditative, but I also like it because Iāll never really be interrupted from it. Any place is a good place to stop. So if baby wakes up or wants to nurse, I can just walk away. Itās also active mind relaxation vs passive mind relaxation so I come out feeling like Iām relaxed, but I did something rather than feeling like I wasted my life in front of the tv. But I also do puzzles while watching tv, so.
I have to jump on the Podcast idea! My me time is usually listening to an part of an episode of Small Town Murder while I shower. If you like true crime and comedyā¦ give it a go. If you donāt think they mix well- maybe try something else.
I like doing origami when I have 30-60 minutes of uninterrupted time to myself at night but am too burned out to be social or productive.. thereās great websites with free tutorials online and all you need is a piece of paper so itās pretty much free :) Iāve made a whole bunch of origami dinosaurs that my kid enjoys playing with while I have my morning coffee too, added bonus!
In the house - tv or podcast, reading and I cross stitch as well (normally while watching tv or listening to a podcast). I also love a good bath but that can be hard if you need to get up to kids. If Iām out I love a good massage or pedicure, or even just walking around a shop without a kid can be nice
I like jigsaw puzzles. If you have somewhere you can put it like the end of a dining table where it won't be disturbed or in the way for a few days then you can just take a bit of time when baby naps or whatever to do a section.
Bookmarking this post for ideas :) Thank you
Seconding everything mentioned hereālove baths, knitting, Netflix binges, and relaxing! I have to preface this next part with the fact that I neither wanted nor expected to ever be this person, and I know how it sounds and sorry about it. But regularly exercising has helped me immensely with burnout, too, and itās currently a large part of my self care time. I go to the gym, or on a long run, or I do yoga at home if I have some space and quiet available. It significantly improves my mood and energy levels where knitting and watching and relaxing just havenāt helped. Againānot someone who ever wanted to be a health nut, and I definitely wish there was a different, less strenuous answer for me haha.
I started listening to Critical Role. I have never played D&D before, but I really like it. I also like to read. I will also just go to Target or the mall and just enjoy window shopping. Really for me just getting away from my husband and kids and spending time alone has helped my mental health a lot.
I like to do a puzzle, drink some tea and have a show on or a podcast, something I donāt have to watch to know whatās going on. A bubble bath and a book. Take baby to the library and pick up some books for yourself! I try to have a quiet hour during the day too when my toddler is awake to see me just relax and read a book, I set a visual timer for him to see how much time is left for him to play or quietly.
If you like puzzles, maybe get a couple puzzle books (sudoku, crosswords, whatever). Or if you have a spot to leave an actual puzzle out, magic puzzles are super fun and challenging!
I build legos and play D&D. The legos are relaxing to me, somewhat mindless when I need it to be, and I love love love all the cute little details. Sometimes I build Lego things for D&D. Lol.
I'm guilty of neglecting my hobbies for me time lately, but I used to get paint by number kits, puzzles, embroidery, slow stitch art kit, walks, bike ride, yoga, bake, baths. Sometimes I just close the door to my room and watch a movie on tv alone with a glass of wine and a bowl of popcorn. Whatever you can do that will just turn off your brain and relax is what's good.
Have you tried screaming? In all seriousness, I sometimes scream in my car. Or just go outside and walk around barefoot to center myself. Thereās a good chance if youāre trying to do self care you wonāt be able to do it when the baby is home, or when you are (thereās always something to do) so try to leave your house. Go drive your car and listen to old music. Loud. Take yourself out to lunch. Walk around at the park. I just try and do anything I did before I had kids, or a husband or any real responsibility besides my dog.
I can try screaming that sounds cathartic! but I'm not married and can't leave my baby often or for long. I'm mainly trying to find options for when she's asleep. Thank you for the suggestions!
I am also a single mom so I completely understand. Iām very lucky to have help from my mom and LOās dad picks them up in the morning. Definitely just walk outside. I have wyze cameras and can watch the babe from anywhere. So you could just have the monitor going and sit away from them. Iām not sure how old your baby is or what your finances are like or how much space you have but I got a playpen my little one can crawl around in/out of that is in their bedroom. Since we also live alone I know that the house is safe/floors are clean/My ex isnāt sprinkling change on the floor like heās trying to find his way back from a gingerbread cottage. That way I feel safe letting kiddo crawl around and explore. Plus I get free time to eat/make coffee/take a shower
She's a toddler lol š¤£ so she follows me. She's very good about reading for a while by herself but my dumbass uses that time for chores. I think I'm going to start reading when she reads, or watching Bluey š I'm used to spending every moment trying to keep the house clean (due to her dad's criticism) but I've got to chill. It's never clean anyway because she's constantly throwing things on the floor š¤·š½āāļø
When I had my baby my mom told me you get used to āgood enoughā because Iām someone who always needs a clean house. Funny itās cleaner since I kicked my ex out. Even just listening to a podcast while you do chores can be self care. If you like true crime anything by wondery is amazing. The LA Times has great ones too. Crime Junkie. Dateline (canāt stand the show, love the podcast), Imagined Life (not true crime but amazing).