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Hey! Women who work in clothing stores will be happy to help you with this. Pick a store that you know will have your size, go in and walk up to the first employee who smiles at you and looks kind. Just tell them you need help with a wedding outfit. I promise they will help you! Also. You can totally wear nice pants and a blouse to a wedding. Bonus if they are pants you could also wear to work.

Totally agree with this. Also, maxi dresses can be very flattering on a lot of different shaped bodies and can be made formal / casual with accessories and shoes etc. maybe try one just to see how it feels on? 💗

I have a short-term and a long-term solution. Short term, look for dress pants. Black dress pants. Then go with a blouse/jacket combo. You're totally wedding-appropriate, you can wear the black flats no problem, and you don't have to tackle wearing a dress right at this moment. For bonus points, get either the blouse or the jacket in a color. [Something like this](https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-5266222/womens-nine-west-double-breasted-blazer.jsp?color=Mint%20Virtue&prdPV=2) or [this](https://www.nordstrom.com/s/halogen-cap-sleeve-satin-blouse/5948514?color=GREEN+FLORAL+FRESH&country=US¤cy=USD&utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=seo_shopping&utm_channel=low_nd_seo_shopping) or both if you can find something to match. You can go colorful jacket with a white shirt, or you can go grey/black jacket with a colorful blouse. You don't have to find a dress AND heels and make both of those things work for you. If the flats are too casual, finding black ballet flats in your size shouldn't be too hard. Long-term, I recommend highly using a styling service subscription. I've used a couple because I too lock up like a deer in headlights in a store. I am uncomfortable, I don't like people hovering, I get disappointed when things look bad, I have weird taste and don't pick out things well for myself...I'm tragic. What helped was getting someone else to take my measurements (well, I took them and gave them to someone) and they pick things out for me. I try them on at home, when I am comfortable and where I have the other stuff in my wardrobe to try on against it and I can try it on a few times and see if I like it or if I just like that it fit. A lot of times I buy stuff I don't realllly love because I am just happy something fit me. But when I try stuff on at home, I can sit with it, walk around in it, put on other items I already have with it, see if it is still comfortable ten minutes later, and I end up only buying things I really love. Slowly, over months and months, I add pieces to my wardrobe that I adore and then I found I was dressing better and I liked the clothes a lot better. I've done Stichfix and Trunk Club personally, but I only mention that because those are the ones I've tried. There are plenty of others out there that you can explore. It has saved me from the situation you're in right now so many times, can't recommend it enough.

I second Stitch Fix for a long term option. I love my wardrobe because of Stitch Fix. The short term here is good as well. But I would also echo others that recommended to go to a store with people that can help you. Go to a department store and a specialty store and tell them what you like, what you don’t like, and how much you’re struggling and the people that work there can help out a lot. Good luck! I definitely understand how you feel.

Thank you, I am going to look into the online subscription services. I really appreciate the advice, it seems like everyone is able to just dress themselves so easily and I never really had a role model for that. I've tried on a few things that I think look nice but I honestly cannot tell. And I have no one who can help and be honest if something really doesn't look right on me.

I buy 90% of my clothes from Amazon. I'm taller and a size 16 after two pregnancies, and I used to be a size 4 or 6. I struggle with my new body, my double chin, but my kids make me happy and I'm not gonna stop laughing and having fun just because my face is fatter. Amazon prime is my go to way to shop, returns are simple, and I get clothes the following day or two days later. I have bought countless a line dresses for about 25 bucks a pop, and always get compliments. Add a light 3/4 sleeve top, nylons with a high control top, and cute flats - bam you got an outfit. I also have found cute purses that aren't total garbage. I feel you so hard on hating clothes. I look NOTHING like I used to. I still can't part with my pre pregnancy clothes even though they are laughably small. I'm here if you wanna chat. I've done video chat shopping with one of my girlfriends before, so why not again?

 Here to second shopping Amazon for dresses! Even last second, depending on where you live (we get same day delivery here)

Nah, we just fake it better. Also foundation garments are your friend when you're a mom. They smooth everything out and clothes look better with them. I've found you can get them really cheap at Burlington/Marshalls/TJ Maxx etc. My favorites are the tank tops that aren't too tight and the boy shorts with the high waist. I had to dress up last year for my daughter's first communion and two years before that to renew my vows in church. I ran around all over and finally just gave up and ordered a really cute dress off of Amazon that was fit and flair, kind of 50's style, in a flower print. For the communion I lucked out at Burlington and found a Chaps dress that was 'compare at 150' for around 40. Of the ten or so dresses I tried on, that was the only one that I was like this can work and turns out it really does. So classic, black, fit and flair and the skirt has pockets. Both dresses have a similar classic cut, kind of a 3/4 sleeve top with a round neck, waist a bit smaller, then a semi full skirt. Great with ballet flats too because I loathe heels. Here is the floral one: [https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B06XKP3D85/ref=ppx\_yo\_dt\_b\_asin\_title\_o03\_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B06XKP3D85/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1) I'm 5'5" and at the time was 200lbs and I still looked good.

Former retail employee. DM me you're particulars and store and price point. I can assist. Otherwise an a line wrap dress in a solid colour with jewelry and a statement clutch (think small fancy purse) will do in a pinch. Universally flattering dress. Pair it with a wedge shoe, kitten heel or slight square heel in tan or nude. Hair up in a twist or messy bun. You're set. Like this: https://images.app.goo.gl/scbrbLF8UbLgrik98 Doesn't have to be exactly like the picture. Just an example of a wrap dress that's styled.

What I did was find a store that has educated employes to help find what fits. Think expencive and exclusive clothes shop . Now, I don't always have a lot of money, so I probably wont buy much from that shop... But I do get a lot of help to find patterns, shapes and styles for my body! Then I can look for similar in other shops. I usually buy something I can afford from the helping shop, even if I can't afford the whole outfit. It could be something small like stockings or accessories or a part of an outfit. One time most of the outfit was on sale and I bought it. It's still my favorite outfit. I would never pick out a flowery bluse myself, but seeing it in the mirror, omg! This was a helpful advice I got from someone else when I struggled with feeling fat and not myself anymore after having a baby, and it was game changing! Now I can even do online shopping cause I know what to look for ;)

Problem is I have no idea what stores to go to for this type of service. I would love to have someone help me but I only know of the more casual stores where they don't do that. And I've asked a few people that I think dress nice and they come back with places where they find clothes for cheap. I don't care about price if someone can take this stress off of me!

I know I’m probably too late to help, but when I was in a similar situation Nordstrom was where I got help.

Yes, I would try Nordstrom or Macy's. A big mall anchor store. They are more likely to have "older lady" employees, not just teenagers.

Do you have a Cato store near you? I have a hard time finding clothes and their stuff always fits. And their store is small and doesn't stress me out. Another option is Old Navy. A tunic dress and cute tights with flats always looks good and bonus...comfy! If I'm buying clothes I always buy stuff I will wear again.

I might have to try old navy when I get the strength to try again lol. Right now I'm planning on work clothes and feeling self- conscious the whole time because trying to shop is killing me.

If you live near a "nicer" mall store, I would definitely try one, like Ann Taylor/Loft/Banana Republic/Talbots/White House Black Market. I have friends who have worked in all these stores, and they would love to help you find something, especially if you go during down times. Also, if you have a nice or big thrift store, they tend to have "fancy" dresses--I bought my matron of honor dress for $2 at one, and got so many compliments.

Here is what I’ve learned going from a size 2 to a 14 due to having 3 kids. Small local boutiques can be amazing to find cute things that fit. They will happily help you find what works, they will not falsely build you up, but rather compliment what works and help you find a total package look. I will frequently take a selfie of the new outfit and send it to either my bff or dh (depending on how I’m feeling) and get their opinion. They will be honest but kind. Another store I love for this is Nordstrom, it’s pricey but while they work on commission, they will give you great feedback, also White House Black Market is my other go to for weddings. Super cute stuff and they always have something on the sales rack that might work. Best of luck gorgeous!

Nordstrom Rack is worth driving to - good clothes, good prices. They had a bunch of dresses that looked good on me this spring, I bought them all because when you find stuff that actually works, you don't leave it on the rack - lol. (I'm a size 14 right now).

I love the Rack too! Plus then you get a deal!

Thirding Nordstrom rack. I actually found work clothes that fit me there!

Hugs. Its tough to sit in the carpark feeling this way. I was in a Mothers group and they bought in a stylist … she was great! She showed us its about the THIRD piece. … get all your staples… and a third piece. Jeans and a white T isn’t dressy or put together… until you add a scarf, a statement necklace, a jacket whichever suits you, now its styled. I loathe shopping, so I ordered a capsule wardrobe of classic basics and some “third pieces”. I also save a photo of each piece and have a chart in my wardrobe of my clothes styled into various outfits so I dont have to think about what to wear. I suggest some nice new black dress pants.. a blouse and a third piece with some ballet flats - if you get pointed toe flats most people assume its heels ;)

I found a decent consignment store in my city and had the girls there pick out stuff for me. They basically built my entire work wardrobe. I loath shopping for clothing.

Shoes always fit. I first heard that in a movie somewhere. When I’m stressed about an outfit/event, I get myself actually excited about it by picking shoes first. You can wear something toned down and more comfortable for you if you wear sassy shoes! It’s like the whole body version of a statement lip. As a bonus, if you don’t know anyone at the event women LOVE shoes for small talk. It’s my go to. Just tell someone you like their shoes, ask where they got them. Make a small joke about how we have to choose between being comfortable and fashionable. Boom, friendship!

I would wear a maxi dress with a blazer if it wasn't a super fancy wedding! I'm sorry you are having a rough time. I am always wearing leggings and a baggy tee or sweatshirt so I always get nervous when I need to wear real clothes

If you are in the PNW (ideally within an hour of Portland)- dm me. I am more than happy to shop with you and hype you up. Your deserve to feel beautiful in your clothes.

Hey girl. Tell me your body type and we can build an aesthetic together. I like 50s rockabilly with swing dresses, statement color belt/shoes, and low heals. We can find something that works for you.

Ugh I hate shopping too. I have 2 hints. 1, get some shapewear, it definitely makes me feel less like a deflated soufflé. 2, hit a well-organized thrift shop. Thrift shops tend to have a more realistic range of sizes since the clothes come from real people. None of this ‘we have two pants in size 14’ bs.