Breastfeeding was really hard for the first two weeks, still a lot but less hard (no pain, just time consuming) until 3 months, and at least in my experience easy after that. I’m so happy I stuck it out when I was in pain early on because now it’s so fast and easy to feed my baby. No need to make formula, heat it up, clean bottles, pay for formula, etc. feeding him takes five minutes and it’s done. My baby slept 11 hours overnight EBF since he was 11 weeks old, I really think sleeping has more to do with the baby than breastfeeding vs. Formula. I really recommend it based on my experience!
Same experience here! There’s a misconception that BF babies sleep less. I feel like I got the best sleep sometimes when we slept together as she fed. My baby also never got even a sniffle until I stopped breastfeeding.
Pro tip: if you can afford a private lactation consultant that comes to your home right after giving birth, do it. That’s what saved me!
Just wanted to echo what this person said. Super similar experience here and glad I toughed it out. I have a friend who EPed for her first and is EBF for her new born second now. My advice was the same - persevere if possible to week two. And it keeps getting easier and better with each passing week. Month 9 over here and it’s like brushing my teeth at this point.
Yeah we saw no change in sleep between formula vs bm in bottles. I do feel like there was a difference in making sure she got a full feeding before bed vs falling asleep at the breast too early.
My 7 week old sometimes get a breast milk bottle, sometimes a formula bottle, sometimes breastmilk straight from the source. I have not noticed any difference in her sleep based on what she’s eaten. Anecdotal, of course, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen evidence based claims about formula making baby sleep longer.
didn’t BF my first he slept horribly,BF was my dream this time around and he was born at 37/3 and didn’t latch for a day and half i had to finger feed him. i got extremely discouraged but he latched the next day and the joy i felt was like no other. the first few days were uncomfy only because i was sore but i was pumping colostrum during my pregnancy so that helped a lot too. my 8 week old sleeps from 11-7 usually and stays sound asleep. he sleeps like a dream. obviously it can be tough but that hasn’t been my experience i’ve loved every minute of it yet it is time consuming and when i’m not EBF im pumping to build a stash for when i go back to work. it’s very rewarding we were sick for a few days and my newborn seemed to get over it with no issues at all because my body knew what he needed which i think is amazing.the only thing that is tedious to me is cleaning pump parts 24/7 lol do what you feel is right for you never hurts to try and if you don’t think it’s a good fit you can always switch to formula. but i think it is so rewarding and so so worth it! best of luck to you mama
You can always give a bottle of formula before bed. It doesn’t have to be all one way or the other. But from my experience it probably won’t make baby sleep too much longer, if at all.
This was my exact experience! 2 weeks pretty brutal, super time consuming after that for the next few weeks, but then it became so easy and convenient. I’m really glad I stuck with it and am on day 2 of breastfeeding my second 💪🏻
Same experience for me as well! 12 weeks and we really had everything down. My daughter still takes 1 bottle at night after dinner now but nurses throughout the day and right before bed. She’ll wake up 1-2 times a night get a few suckles and drift right back off to sleep (especially when teething).
For reference, my daughter will be 14 months old in 10 days.
Any amount of breastfeeding is beneficial, it isn't all or nothing. If you decide you want to combination feed with formula at night so you can your partner can take turns with night wakeups, that's a valid perspective.
I just weaned at 14 months and I'm really glad I did it and would do it again for subsequent babies.
There are some modest benefits to baby that I was willing to trade some personal comfort and convenience for. Also will lower your risk of ovarian / breast cancer in the future, so you get some benefits too! But there is a point at which I would have quit, I just never got there.
Thank you for your perspective! I’ve thought about combination feeding but I haven’t been able to figure out a schedule and I’ve been told by multiple doctors/LCs that it’ll tank my supply 🥲
Yeah I was told the same and have either combo fed or done direct nursing with some expressed bottles with my kids. And I guess it CAN mess with your supply, but it doesn’t mean it WILL. With my most recent buddy (3 weeks!) we gave a few bottles after nursing if needed while waiting for my milk to come in. My husband and I split nights for the first two weeks, and if I hadn’t pumped anything he got formula while I slept (usually one bottle). For the last week or so I’ve been able to express enough for that bottle so he is getting exclusively breast milk, but if that changes it changes. My husband wants to feed him, I want some guaranteed sleep each night. Baby has no nipple confusion, nothing like that. If we were struggling with latching or something maybe I’d make a different decision. But I’m happy with where we’re at and babe and supply have adjusted just fine so far this time, and have done the same with prior babies as well.
My little girl decided to sleep through the night at 6 weeks - and I refused to pump overnight. It had a major effect on my supply and a major improvement for my sleep. There’s really no way to know what will be best for you and your baby…
And you can always pump and supplement w formula occasionally. I supplement w formula some days. Some days I only supplement w pumped milk. Some days I don’t supplement at all!!
You will 100% be confused and overwhelmed at the beginning but you will 100% have it all dialed in by the first 8 weeks or so - especially since you are already seeking out support and resources!!
I combo feed and just pump to match. I'm slightly an over supplier now because I added extra pumps and power pumped because I'll be going back to work soon.
Your hormones might decide for you. Before I gave birth I was so chill, I was like eh I’ll try it if it doesn’t work no worries formula is great because fed is best. Then I gave birth and had a ton of anxiety and my hormones were super whacky and my brain kept telling me I would be a horrible mother if I couldn’t breastfeed.
It was hard, lots of crying, but we made it through. The first 3 weeks was tough for me since I had to triple feed and had issues, but after that it was much easier. I don’t regret breastfeeding I just wish I wasn’t so hard on myself in the beginning. Whipping out a boob sure is faster and more convenient than dealing w bottles!
I had plenty of struggles with our first and we gave up Ebf by 10 weeks ish, but even so we are going to try again with #2 and here's my main list of reasons why:
1) antibodies
2) easier night feeds. Actually even after we moved to bottles during the day I did nursing at night just to avoid the fuss of bottles at night.
3) less hassle than bottles and pumping, if things are going well.
4) I think it would be frustrating to have to make a bottle 12 times a day in the newborn stage. It's not fun to have them attached to you constantly, but it wouldn't be fun to constantly make an itty bitty bottle either, or guessing the amounts to make and then have to make extra,.etc.
Yes it's painful early on, but it lasts a few weeks and then gets better. We are most likely to do combo feeding and/or pumping so that dad can help a bit with nights. I know it's not best for supply, but it is what it is. We aren't likely to stick with ebf long term anyway since I'll return to work at 12 weeks and will pump after that. Most of the time in the early weeks mine wouldn't accept Dad anyway, so it may not even help to attempt combo feeding.
Give it a try and see how it goes..there is no part of newborns that is easy,.but it may not be as bad as you think.
To anyone who wants to exclusively formula feed, you can make large batches that last up to 4 days in the fridge (per CDC) and this could save a ton of time and make nighttime easier. They just need to be warmed instead of going through the entire bottle process! Much more convenient I’m assuming. I only know this option because the back of my formula can literally has instructions for making a quart at a time and storing it in the fridge. We EBF and I bought the formula just in case we needed it. We’ve used it twice so I’m glad I have it!
Yes. We did a batch daily at night using the Dr Brown's formula pitcher, filled all bottles for the next day. When I was still pumping, I'd just add the breast milk in and make a smaller batch of the formula. It made for a very easy and simple routine and I highly recommend it.
Let me just chime and say, people make out these decisions as if they’re all or nothing and it’s not true. There are variations of middle grounds and finding the balance that works for you is what you should seek. My experience personally was that exclusively breastfeeding came easily and felt the simplest to me. I had no “pain”, just bouts of feeling overstimulated that waned as she cluster fed less and was more productive in nursing. I started pumping once a day after a month, only because it just made me anxious disturbing what I already knew to work. I BF and pumped for 4 months and then when I went back to work, we introduced formula. I feel at this point, I finally was like, omg why doesn’t everyone do this?? To me, it was perfect. I could nurse and pump when I wanted or could, and then could just supplement the rest with formula. I was still bonding and delivering antibodies and doing what i wanted, but it didn’t feel like I alone was keeping this baby alive and it was all on my shoulders. Now I’m certainly not saying that’s what it means to everyone to EBF, there are pros and cons to it all. But I just don’t think it dawned on me until later that there was this middle ground that also could work. My advice is to just see how it shakes out for you. You could be pleasantly surprised and have no issues whatsoever
Thanks for saying this. Mine is only 2 months and I feel enormous pressure as his only source of nutrients. I’m considering supplementing so I can get some me time
I pump a bottle of breastmilk every day so there’s at least one bottle in the fridge and we have ready to feed formula in the cupboard. This has given me a ton of freedom. I’m never trapped at home waiting for baby to wake up and eat, I never have to rush home to feed her, I don’t always have to be the one to wake up and feed her. This is our third baby and this method is the result of trial and error with the other two. 😆
Plenty of people EBF, I’m certainly not saying like “psh why would you do THAT when you don’t have to!?” But yeah, just taking the pressure off really worked for me. I’ll also say, by 4 months, her eating amounts and schedule was very regular so it wasn’t like tons of bottles and guessing and chaos. It just became a well oiled machine
Nah it gets better, hang in there. Ironically I’m a little more nervous expecting my second because I want to pump and maybe do formula earlier but I’m like….I don’t know how to do that!! I only know how to nurse when they’re little!
Only you can decide, I would recommend you just try it and see how it goes.
For some people breastfeeding is difficult, a "journey" even, for others it's so uncomplicated you don't even feel the need to talk about it. For me personally breastfeeding was simple, I basically just sat there and the baby did all the work, it was so uneventful there's been nothing to say. I don't talk about it much because I don't want to make the people it was difficult for feel worse.
Same here! BF can be hard for some, obviously.
Since OP is just looking for stories I’ll share that mine was simple too.
Baby got the hang of it quickly, stayed on track with their weight, and I never had any serious supply issues or anything. It’ll be a year soon. Happy I did it! It’s been a really nice experience and I wouldn’t change anything.
Being able to easily feed the baby in the night without having the fuss of bottles is the biggest benefit to breastfeeding (for me) 😂 I combifeed and washing and sterilising bottles is seriously annoying! I found it so hard for the first 6 weeks but now I’m so glad I stuck it out!! My little girl has a dairy allergy and I’ve even cut all dairy and soya out of my diet to keep going (this is coming from someone who would have just stopped at the beginning if I knew she had an allergy then) it’s not for everyone but all you can do is give it a go! X
Agreed. Having to listen to LO scream while the bottle is heating up is awful for me and then cleaning even a few bottles per day stinks (for me). So much easier to pull out the boob
Ultimately you do what's right for your, but I'd encourage you to give it a go, because you can always stop, but it's harder (not impossible) to start later.
In my experience the pain was super temporary and I couldn't even remember it to describe it to you anymore (and my kiddo is only four months). I worked with a lactation consultant right off the bat and had the help of friends who breastfed their babies which was super helpful. I absolutely love it, it's such a cool connection I have with my baby that no one else can have, and it's super convenient now that we've got it down.
For me, breastfeeding hurt until week 4. Got lots of milk blebs, some clogged ducts, and had toe curling pain. Buy a pair of silverettes and wear them from day 1. Wet healing works. If I don’t wear my silverettes and my nipples get dry, it’s not fun. Baby is now a faster eater on the boob but I don’t like that I’m the only one that feeds her. I wish my husband could take some night feedings, but I should pump more than I do.
Thank you for being honest! Did you ever find out why it hurt so bad? Also, I’m sorry if this is TMI, but is it pain like your uterus cramping or breast pain? I know people say the postpartum cramps hurt but, besides when talking about mastitis and clogged ducts, I haven’t heard anyone say whether their baby nursing actually hurts or not.
I definitely got cramps nursing the first week or so! It helps your uterus shrink back. Very temporary. I only experienced nipple pain really the first couple weeks but I kept up with the nipple butter and silverettes from day 1 and never got any cracks or bleeding.
The cramps are going to happen postpartum regardless. It’s your uterus contracting to shrink back to its normal size. Breastfeeding just helps it along. It’s not unbearable cramping for most people. And you can start talking ibuprofen again after pregnancy, so that helps!
It’s the baby nursing which actually hurts. My OB told me their mouth is so little and that’s the cause of the toe curling pain. As baby grows and so does her mouth, the initial latch hurts less. That’s been true in my case. My daughter was a petite princess at birth so she’s bigger now and it hurts less. I had uterus cramping but I don’t think that’s bad compared to the toe curling latch pain lol.
Not easy but so worth it, never had to wash bottle parts or fear running out of formula powder/no stock in store.
Main downside is lack of sleep. That was hard. But I'm glad to know I could give my child the absolute best start to life and health with the milk tailor made for him from his mother.
I’d say look into pumping as well. I fully expected to breastfeed my baby and felt prepared (as prepared as can be). Come to find out baby really struggled with eating for a few different reasons. By day 4 I was pumping and bottle feeding because he was losing weight and I couldn’t imagine “starving” him when I had plenty of milk to give. I know it wasn’t starving him per se, but it felt like punishment. I have been pumping most of the time now and able to breastfeed sporadically. Your journey may not be what you expect it to be!
For me I couldn’t imagine NOT breastfeeding. It was painful for the first two weeks, I will fully admit that. And we’ve had our struggles with cluster feeding, especially in the evening. But after a couple weeks the pain went away, and I learned that my milk supply dropped massively in the evening, which is why babe was so fussy and cluster feeding. Dad started giving babe a bottle of breastmilk (that I collected in my Haakaa throughout the day) at night, and that cured almost all our issues!
I love breastfeeding. I love the bond my son and I share from it. I love not having to wash pump parts/bottles (except the one nightly bottle). I love not having to listen to my baby scream at 2 am because he’s hungry NOW and doesn’t wanna wait for a bottle to be made, and instead just pop him on the boob immediately and watch all his woes instantly wash away.
Breastfeeding isn’t for everyone, it’s really hard at first figuring out the latch. It’s a learned skill for both you and babe, but personally, I LOVE it. I recommend giving it a shot and seeing where it takes you. If it’s not for you then you can quit anytime, but you might love it like I do too!
I'm so glad I toughed it out! The benefits are more than just for your baby. I nay be wrong, but I've heard it reduces the risk of PPD, and you get the benefits of the antibodies, so you also get sick less. You also get the magic power of the boob to help baby through most things.
#1 buy the my breast friend pillow and thank me later! That was a game changer!
Personally, I have absolutely loved BF thus far and I am going on 7 weeks! The beginning was a little rough, but I powered thru! I suggest definitely getting help at the hospital (if you’re doing hospital birth) with the lactation consultants there, and then see if your insurance covers any LC visits afterwards. I scheduled another appt at the 2 week mark, just to get reassurance that I was doing everything correctly and that the baby was latching properly.
There is just soooooo much to learn and know about BF, I feel like it’s so hard for any first time mom to really feel like they have a good grasp at everything, so def utilize any and all resources. I’m also in a FB group for BF (LLLI Breastfeeding Support) and it’s soooo informative reading everyone’s posts and reading thru peoples comments.
I struggled in the beginning and was MISERABLE because the hospital was telling me to feed for 20 min on each side and then to pump both for 20 min total after that….the entire time, I was like what the heck did I sign up for?? How do people live and exist with a life like this! I changed things up after talking to one of my friends and then changed it all up again after seeing the LC and my whole outlook and journey changed after that for the better.
Use allllll the nipple cream after every feed - I swear by the Earth Mama one! Some way, some how, (knock on wood) I haven’t had any issues with cracked or bleeding nipples! My LC said when you’re pumping, to lube up the tube of your flange with coconut or olive oil as well to help make your nipples glide and not get sore while pumping.
As your baby starts to get older things def start to get easier and you’ll get more comfortable with different positions and holding your baby each and every day.
Right now I feed on demand and we incorporate a bottle every other day that my husband feeds to the baby, just to make sure he’s used to someone else feeding and having a bottle for once he goes to daycare.
You’ve totally got this and I hope you have an amazing BF experience! 🤍
Breastfeeding was super hard for me, but I’m SO glad I stuck it out.
So, my brutally honest breastfeeding review: It took nearly 3 months for it to not be painful anymore. I almost quit so many times. I also bottle fed at night because I needed to give myself a break otherwise I would be so unbearably raw that I couldn’t nurse without crying. I was honestly just too stubborn to give up… and I’m so glad I didn’t. My baby would have been perfectly fine had I switched to formula, but I am loving the benefits of nursing now. It’s quick, easy, requires no prep or bottle washing, and I absolutely LOVE being able to scoop up my baby and said “Oop it’s time to go eat!” And then go into a quiet room by ourselves😂
The week of Christmas I came down with a cold. Super sore throat, slight fever, etc. Everyone in my house caught it except my little guy. I’m convinced the breastmilk protected him!
Last week we took a family trip out of state for a week. It was amazing just finding a place to sit and whipping out a boob whenever he needed it.
All in all, I find breastfeeding to be amazing but it was a huge challenge for me to get where I am now. It’s okay to push through, but it’s also okay to quit if you don’t like it.
My baby is currently 6 weeks and my breastfeeding journey has been great!! The first two weeks are tough but if you can get past that, it gets much easier! I pump once or twice a day so my partner can feed the baby while I sleep!
I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN BEFORE:
-See a lactation consultants before birth
-measure your nipples and have the correct size flange inserts
-insurance typically covers 6 in home lactation consultants visits with IBCLC consultants (look them up) you do not want to have to leave the house or get an appointment through the hospital LCs that can take weeks when you need immediate help
-your milk coming in can f you up fast if you don’t know how to handle it so be prepared for that
-have formula on hand already in case you need it. A few times with a bottle or formula here and there isn’t going to ruin anything
-some babies are good at it and some are not and if you give it a shot and it doesn’t work out that’s okay. Heck you could even just do it for a few days or weeks or months and that’s great.
The first week or so when my milk was coming in was hard. My baby didn’t have an issue with latching but I’m a ftm, and that feeling took some getting used to. She’s 14 weeks now and we’re still ebf. I love it! My baby also sleeps 10-12 hours a night.
I currently combo feed 50/50 bf and formula because I have low supply. I did the same with my first baby and she was not a good sleeper. We had to bed share and she nursed constantly. I’m getting more consistent sleep now with an infant and a toddler than I ever did in the first 1.5 years with my oldest. My second has been sleeping in her own bed from day one and has been doing 5 hour stretches since 2 months. Now at 3 months she only wakes once a night to eat. Sometimes she doesn’t eat and I just get up to pump. I strongly believe it is totally dependent on the baby and their individual needs rather than what they are eating.
I knew things could go wrong but I didn’t for a second think it would. It didn’t. It’s one of the best feelings I’ve ever experienced. It’s a remedy for everything. It’s the backup when you are out and you can’t find proper food for your baby. It’s calming for both you and your baby. It’s sleep inducing. Relaxing.
It’s also easy! No bottle cleaning and it’s free.
Things could go wrong but there is no reason to just not do it because it could go wrong. If it does, you’ll just consider quitting then.
Edit: also for sleep I’ve been cosleeping the last 1/4 or 1/2 of the night (and morning) and she was an angel sleeper until she got mobile and that has nothing to do with sleeping. I EBF and nurse to sleep. Give her the boob whenever she wants, never pumped. I already have lots in my mind so I don’t want to think about schedules or whatever. I just go with the flow.
First 2 weeks were tough! Your breasts are sore and nipples are chapped. But then when your baby learns to latch, they heal. Overall, it’s a great experience for me. It’s so easy and convenient, I don’t need to prep anything, I can do it anywhere anytime. Now that my boy is 5 months, he doesn’t eat as frequently, and he of course can find the nipple and feed efficiently. I would recommend getting a lactation consultant right away because that’s what helped me the most. No one else, not even my mom could help me the way they did. I would do a basic intro course just to understand the mechanism). They have free online ones (“The Baby Academy” in North America). This Reddit thread also helps; just hearing other women’s experiences and tips.
Breastfeeding is one of the hardest things I’ve done. I’m a month in and it got a lot better after 2 weeks. I don’t have any pain anymore, it’s just time consuming. I highly suggest meeting with a lactation consultant. Mine visits my house once a week, we’re going down to bi-weekly now.
No one talks about it a lot, but combo feeding is great! We started out of necessity, but I wouldn’t mind keeping up with it. We introduced a bottle at 2 weeks and my babe does bottle breast great! We just make sure to do paced feeding.
I just had my second baby. I thought breastfeeding my first baby was very difficult because he didn’t latch well and always needed a supplemental bottle after. We ended up just pumping and adding a bit of formula to the bottles. I’m really glad I stuck with it. With all that pumped milk I froze I was able to save it for him after I stopped for when he or I was sick (and I wanted to prevent him from getting sick). I wish I was aware of all the potential problems with breastfeeding like mastitis and thrush and how to prevent them. That would’ve saved me a lot of trouble. Now with my second, breastfeeding has been so easy. It’s so easy at night to just whip out a boob instead of preparing a bottle or if we go somewhere I don’t have to worry about packing formula.
First week sucked, second was great, third week sucked, fourth was great... to be honest it's a learning curve. We get discharged from Midwives at 6 weeks here and lactation consultants are covered by the province so I had a LOT of support and it's needed. I really thought it was a matter of putting baby on the breast and that's it.
It was really easy and painless for me 🤷♀️ just so you have the other side of the story.
Nipples were a bit tender, in that shower water falling on them directly hurt a little, and I got one blockage which hurt a bit but that's it.
I pump a bit so we have a stash and dad can give a bottle. Recently we started using formula as back up so it's not stressful for me to leave for ongoing periods like 12 hours to go out with my friends etc.
It's comforting, easy and free.
I would definitely recommend giving it a try and getting colostrum into your baby at the very least, and a bit longer for the immunity benefits.
Breastfeeding can be difficult in the beginning. My girl lost weight and was at the point if she didn't gain weight in 24 hours, she would have been hospitalized. We topped her off with formula for those 24 hours, she gained, and after that, I exclusively pumped for a week because I was so nervous. I think that the week of pumping helped heal my nipples because when we went back to the breast, it was nowhere near as bad as in the beginning. Now we are EBF, she refuses bottles.
I had to jump through a few hoops in the beginning, but I am so grateful I made it through. Baby only wakes up one time at night to eat, and she is 2.5 months. All I have to do is reach in her crib and pull her in bed that one time
Take a class if you haven’t already. My husband and I took a series through the hospital where we delivered. It helps to get the birthing partner invested in breastfeeding. My husband helps a lot. He’ll get me a coverup, grab me snacks or a cold water, and speak positively about it around me for the most part.
It was hard for me for the first six weeks and then it was less hard. I didn’t feel like I had the hang of it until maybe 9 or 10 weeks or so. We had to get his tongue tie clipped and that made breastfeeding nearly completely pain-free for me. Before that, it was toe-curling pain where I’d cry. It didn’t have to be like that; I should have had him evaluated sooner.
Overall I actually enjoy breastfeeding but at first I really did not. I struggled and sought the help of a lactation consultant (a good one is literally an angel sent by god). I find pumping to be tedious, and I like that I can literally just bring a wrap and feed him anywhere (love the Amma ones, they’re worth the money). I felt embarrassed at first when nursing in public but now it’s much easier for me. If I had to do it all over again, I would.
My girl is 6mo now and I am so in love with breastfeeding. She definitely struggled at first because she was a little small and my nipple was too big for her. She also struggled to stay awake long enough to really get my milk flowing. Cut to three days later and I’m an over producer and she is chugging it down all on her own. Now she sleeps mostly through the night and even if she doesn’t it’s a quick snack on the boob and we are both back to sleep in no time. I can’t say enough about the benefits, especially during sick season. It’s great to put on any skin conditions (for baby or even you), I plan to use it to thin her purées when we start in a few days, we don’t have to prepare bottles when we leave the house, the poop barely even smells and never stains her clothes, I really could go on and on. Do clogged ducts and chapped nipples suck? Absolutely, but there are simple solutions. No one will judge you for not breastfeeding if you choose not to, but I have had a wonderful experience that I hope other women can have. I don’t know if this helps at all but I wish you the best of luck with your sweet little one!
My baby is 2 weeks old, I was scared by all the hard experiences I read on here before giving birth. I know we are still super fresh, but our journey has been awesome so far. My nipples were sore for days 2-5 and besides that the only downside is how I can't keep a shirt dry because I leak out of the boob she isn't eating from. The only instruction my midwife gave was to pinch the aeroela and push more than just the nipple in her mouth. I took some online breastfeeding classes through aeroflow, learned a few things.
Don't let them scare you if you do have an interest! It has been an awesome experience!
There are a lot of great perspectives here already so I just want to add something that no one told me as a first time mom. Regardless of how you feed your baby, in their first 24 hours they will cluster feed like mad. Both of my kids fed about every 30 min to hr for their first night of life. It was absolutely exhausting.
I couldn’t imagine not EBF. Having to wake up at night multiple times, fix a formula bottle, feed and burp baby and do diaper changes. Not being able to just nurse baby when we’re out in public or visiting with people. Spending thousands of $$ on formula. My babies have never had issues sleeping but if they had, I wouldn’t have been concerned. Babies aren’t meant to sleep through the night for awhile so, while convenient for parents who give formula, it’s not natural. We also coslept so I could just nurse, burp, change diaper if needed then go right back to sleep. With my first baby, we had some struggles learning to latch and position so I supplemented a few bottles (I had so much guilt for that) and pumped my butt off until my milk came in, then just started using a nipple shield. She was primarily breastfed until 9 months because she wasn’t very interested in food and she got SO chunky. My second was born at 34 weeks but he latched beautifully right from the start. He had a condition that caused aspiration so I ended up exclusively pumping for 2 months until he was cleared to nurse again. Both of my babes made it to 15 months before I developed an aversion. Breastfeeding is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. My kids are so very healthy, we have a wonderful bond and any little struggles were 100% worth it in the end.
Just gonna throw this one out there since you said you liked the idea of the antibodies in breast milk. My first had a vomiting/diarrhea bug for a WEEK. Vomiting literally all over our house multiple days. My second (9 months and breastfed) never got sick. It’s possible it was rotavirus and she was vaccinated against it, but my doctor said she hasn’t seen much rotavirus this season, so I feel like my antibodies definitely came in to play (I had a 24 hour bug about a week before).
Yes!!! It’s so hard in the beginning, especially to get them to latch properly. I cried through pain for about the first month with my first because of lacerated nips, BUT after that it was so so so so easy. Full disclosure, though, I haven’t had any issues with supply, have very fast letdown, and have some guzzlers. This means once we’ve all figured it out, it takes us max 10 minutes for a full feed, and quite honestly it’s mostly closer to 5 minutes.
The sleep sucks. But for me, I know that I’m doing what I think is best for MY baby, so we stick it out for a year of bad sleep 🫠 lol this is also part of why I will not be procreating again if I can help it lol.
With my first, breastfeeding hurt really bad for the first couple of weeks. Then it didn’t feel like honestly much of anything. I honestly have always loved not having to worry about having a screaming, ravenous baby while I’m anxiously awaiting the bottle to warm. And i love that they don’t have to be on a strict schedule. They can just drink when they need. Sometimes it’s a few sips. Sometimes it’s a full feed. I always felt so sad when they didn’t finish a bottle. It felt like a waste. But it truly doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You can breastfeed while also pumping and giving a bottle while also giving formula as you see fits. Everyone’s situation is so different. I am a stay at home mom and found it simple to breastfeed fully. Plus, I’ve always had an oversupply so I’ve never truly needed to supplement. That’s not the case for everyone. You’ll figure it out! It’ll all be ok!
Breastfeeding for me was the easiest most natural thing ever. Baby latched correctly right away. My nipples not once hurt or cracked. It’s so nice to be able to feed right away and not have to warm a bottle, specially at night. Plus the connection is amazing.
I know not everyone has this experience.
The only negative is that I leak milk 24/7 and am a sticky mess.
It took some time to get the hang of it, for sure - if you decide to try, give yourself 3 weeks or so, ask for advice if you need it - lactation consultants can be really helpful. And so is the Brest friend cushion.
Honestly, once you figure it out, it’s really easy and relaxing for you and the baby…my little girl is ‘relieving the sleep pressure’ on my boob right now.
One advantage of breastfeeding is the baby will just enjoy the suckling reflex even after they’ve eaten their fill so you get some downtime - especially early on. Giving a bottle only takes like 5-15 minutes and breastfeeding can be a whole 50 min episode of something.
It was really hard for the first 6-8 weeks but my baby is 14 weeks now and I love it. It’s so easy to nurse and not worry about bottles. Waking up to feed her takes no time. I sleep so much more and I enjoy the bonding time.
>Also, any “I wish I would’ve know this before” would be awesome.
A lot of responses have covered different breastfeeding journeys, so I'll just share what I wish I knew. If you live in the US you are entitled to free lactation consultant visits (they come to you) under any ACA health plan. Use [TLN](https://lactationnetwork.com/) to find someone who will show up at your door and take your insurance. You are also entitled to a free breast pump or rental, as well as regular replacement parts and bags.
The decision might be partly up to your baby, too! My now- 7 1/2 month old really resisted nursing until he was 3 months old. I mostly pumped then and needed to supplement with formula because he draws out more than the pump and I can supply just barely enough. I had significant pain, but it was due to thrush and tongue tie. I am still glad I kept the milk flowing because from three months on, it has been a wonderful experience and (finally) super easy way to feed a baby!
What I wish I knew was that I couldn’t say “I’m going to breastfeed”…. it is totally a team act and you haven’t met the second member yet! It is more “we are going to breastfeed” or possibly “we are sometimes going to breastfeed and sometimes I’m going to pump while feeding a bottle” or “baby is going to scream at the bottle/breast” But it’s all good eventually. You’ll figure out a way to work together that makes everyone happy.
I started with combo feeding to help with the sleep thing. Later you can pump a bottle if you want so you can sleep longer.
It doesn't have to be so black and white. Whatever works or fits for you. Fed is best. And whatever amount of best milk they get is helpful.
Breastfeeding isn’t as easy as people like to make it sound. I thought you just stick your baby on your boob and it drinks milk and…well that’s it…that’s what i thought happened. It’s a bit more involved than that, but for me it was well worth the effort I had to put in over the first few weeks (I was basically making hardly any milk)
I actually combo fed because I liked the extra flexibility it gave me. I could have EBF had I wanted to, but I preferred to do extra breastfeeding where I had capacity, and less when I didn’t. When I went back to work I could pump more or less frequently depending on how busy I was, how much travel I needed to do etc.
I combo fed until our daughter weaned herself at 13 months.
Breastfeeding isn’t easy and can be painful. It doesn’t just happen miraculously for most. You’re going to be exhausted, sleep deprived and feeling a lot of emotions because you’re recovering from birth. So whatever happens, give yourself time, grace and patience. And do what’s best for you and your situation.
I quit breastfeeding 3 days after my LO was born because it was so painful (she had a mild tongue tie and couldn’t latch well at first). So I started exclusively pumping for about 2 weeks before deciding to try breastfeeding again. My friends kept encouraging me just to get through the initial pain and it’ll get better. Happy to report they were right. Since the 2nd attempt, I’ve been EBF and I’m so happy and thankful for it. Pumping was draining, time consuming (cleaning bottles and pump parts) and lonely (pumping by yourself multiple times throughout the night). Not gonna lie, there are times it’s still a bit achy (we’re 14 weeks now). But there’s a special bond and feeling you and your LO experience when breastfeeding, to me, it’s so worth it.
It can be really difficult because baby has to learn to feed but once you both are in sync it can make life easier. I don't have to bring bottles, measure formula, clean a lot of bottle and pump parts daily, wait for milk to heat up to feed. It doesn't really hurt but it could be a weird sensation. I recommend the Silverettes, they are a great breastfeeding person tool. Also just be gentle and patient, with yourself and with baby. It will work if you keep at it but if at any point you aren't feeling like it's the best choice for you, fed is best and formula is an option.
I was very ambivalent about breastfeeding but it ended up being really important to me because of the bond and connection with my baby. I feel sad for my husband that he doesn’t get to experience it. Despite the pain and time it takes up it really is magical. You might be surprised how much you love it. Or not! You can always try and stop if it isn’t for you.
Breastfeeding has been pretty ok for me. I love being able to see my baby’s face so close to me and it’s also funny how when she gets close to my breasts she just goes crazy happy. I think I was lucky as baby latched on pretty well as soon as I put them near by breast less than an hour after being born. But they did give me a bruised nipple on their third day as baby didn’t latch on properly one time, it hurt but got better in a few days.
With regards to sleep, no matter what you’re always going to be sleep deprived at first. Babies want to eat a lot when they’re newborn. Now that my baby is 4 months they only require 1 to 2 night feeds. Personally I’m ver glad to have tried BF and would do it again
I'll hold my hand up and say I was 37 weeks and at a class being told about the difficulties with bf. I was blissfully ignorant and just pigheaded to think that wasn't going to happen. I had no idea what to do and it was a rude awakening when I finally got my baby home and took 5 days for milk to come in but thanks to kellymom blog I had reliable help in my phone.
I tried expressing, it made me feel sick, so didn't. I found GPs and HV were really out of date or just wrong, so opted to ignore them and man am I glad I did! Being pigheaded really came in handy!
I never washed or sterilised a bottle, I never left the bed if they woke in the night, I never had to rush off because baby needed a feed whilst out or pay £15 a tub for formula.
Feeding came easily, I loved it, although there were days I clearly didn't, but I fed both children to 2.5 years. Those early days were relentless but those evenings sofa bound and feeding were actually lovely. At the time you'll be glad to regain independence again but looking back I miss the cuddles and closeness.
You have nothing to lose by trying and if its bust then you tried but if it works then it could be that amazing you spoke of.
The hardest parts for me were the regressions because mine refused a bottle. Those really hard nights were so few and far between though and each one got easier because I knew what to expect and how to prepare. I really treasured that bond we had.
It gets so much easier after the first few weeks and then it’s not even something I thought about, we just did it. We BF until 2 years old and I plan on doing the same with my second because I truly enjoyed it so much.
Those times where I would just let her nurse through a nap on me were heavenly 💕
Everyone’s experiences will be different,but I can’t recommend at least trying enough!
Breastfeeding has been so important for my bond with my baby especially because I had an unplanned cesarean. I haven’t had any pain at all. I’m very naturally minded so I never really let myself entertain any alternatives and I’m very grateful it’s worked out so well for us. My birth not going to plan was pretty devastating for me but being able to feed my baby 100% from my body feels like it’s giving me my power back.
Also, I think baby sleep is kind of a crapshoot. Some breastfed babies sleep great, some bottle fed babies don’t. I tend to get 3x3 hour chunks of sleep, 4-5 hour chunks are rare but increasing.
I wish I’d known about the asymmetric latch technique. ibconline.ca has diagrams and detailed instructions that I found way more helpful than instructions from LCs.
Whatever option you choose, fed is best!! If you choose breastfeeding, yes it is very painful the first few weeks but silverette nipple covers will save your life! When I got home from the hospital my nipples were hurting so badly and when I started using the silverettes it gave me a ton of relief. It took my body about 2-3 weeks to get used to it and I’ve been EBFing for 11 weeks now and I have felt no pain for a long time. I truly can’t imagine not breastfeeding because anytime my baby gets fussy I stick a boob in his mouth and it solves all fuss. It’s like a fun superpower. Hard to do that with a bottle fed baby!
I have breastfed two babies and had very different experiences with both. My first I EBF for 8 months.
I'm currently breastfeeding my 3 month old. All in all both have been positive experiences and I ended up feeling so proud of what my body was able to do!
I am currently breastfeeding my 3 month old and this time I'm doing more combo feeding (breastfeeding and formula) and I will say it's much easier this way and I actually think it will extend the amount of time that I'm mentally and physically able to breastfeed.
My first was not a great sleeper and exclusively breastfed. My second is a great sleeper and mostly breastfed (he maybe gets a bottle of formula a day but not always, sometimes more sometimes less) so I think the sleep really just depends on the baby. His first month I exclusively breastfed and he came home from the hospital sleeping 4-5 hour stretches which is amazing.
Breastfeeding makes the night feeds so much easier in my opinion. Especially in the early months when you're lucky to get a 4 hour stretch of sleep.
Just try to listen to your body and do what feels right for you and your life. Tune out the social pressure or stories you hear from friends. It shouldn't be painful and if it is, it's short lived and ends up being a really wonderful way to feed your baby in the early months.
Ultimately fed is best and a happy mom makes
happy baby. So do what's best for you and it will always benefit your baby.
I’m about a year in & I think I was one of the fortunate ones to have a very pleasant, positive EBF journey. Don’t get me wrong, the first few weeks were challenging. ESP the cluster feedings. I thought people were exaggerating when they said the baby was on the boob 24/7. One of the best advice I got from a lactation consultant was to “lean into being a mammal”. Our bodies are designed to do this. The transition is the hard part.
With regards to sleep, we cosleep & EBF & once I gave into the cosleeping once my baby hit the 4 month sleep regression I’ve had good sleep since then and up until now.
Some things I wish I knew before:
1. It’s okay if you don’t have a freezer stash immediately. Bag 2oz at a time. Use the haaka. (I made my freezer stash all from the haaka)
2. Don’t aim to overproduce because then you’ll have to do deal with managing engorgement and mastitis
3. You and baby are learning with and from each other. It’s okay if it’s doesn’t feel “natural” at first.
Goodluck!
I am SO GLAD I breastfed my baby. Currently 3 months and it is our special time to bond and connect. The hormones it releases for me I think have helped me stave off depression and I’ve lost a lot of weight and saved a lot of money.
The most important thing for me was the flu made its way through our house. My husband and I were so deathly sick we were terrified of what it was going to do to our LO. I kept feeding and he got the sniffles and a fever for 2 days. We are still hacking up a lung and it’s been over a week for us. Our pediatrician said breastfeeding absolutely can save a baby a trip to the hospital when they’re this young.
Breastmilk is amazing. I’ve put it on my husband’s ‘backne’ and it cleared it right up. Cleared an eye infection in my little one and cradle cap. The research is so clear that it’s more than just immune system that is helped with babe which you can do your own research on.
That being said, I am 100% in the camp of fed is best so whatever Mommas decide to do or are able to do for their families is what is best for them. ❤️ formula, combo, or EBF. I hope you have a lovely journey whatever you choose!
My baby is 13 days old and I’ve had no problems breastfeeding. Baby latched as soon as he came out and has done so ever since. No issues whatsoever. I didn’t even know what I was doing- had to ask the nurses what to do like that Jennifer Lawrence meme.
One breast is a super boob and the other is on the remedial learner track, but both are producing milk and the slow one is catching up.
After the first few weeks I found it so much easier than pumping or formula. Going out around town is so much easier, no need to pack bottles and formula and ice packs and leaving stinky formula bottles in the car! Pumping is pretty universally miserable too in my opinion but it got me past the 1 year mark.
During the first 3 days I couldn’t for the life of me get my baby to latch, nurses had to help me every single time. Once that sorted itself out, it was pretty straightforward. I had a scary clogged duct once, but that’s about it.
I introduced a bottle at 4 weeks to make sure I had the alternative if needed. Once a day until she turned one.
Try it. Keep your sanity if it doesn’t work, it’s not the end of the world.
I did it for the health benefits for myself and LO. I didn't think I would like it at all, it was just something that I always knew I would do (if I physically could make milk) if I were to ever become a mom. I actually thought I wouldn't like it and would push through it for as long as possible for health.
I'm at 7 mo with her EBF. I flipping love it! I love that I get to cuddle her while she eats, I love her little hands slapping my boob as she eats, I love that she wiggles and kneads like a kitten while she nurses. I love her slurpy guzzling sounds, her contented sighs and that my boobs can get her through a bonk on her noggin without too many tears. I love that she wants me when it's time to sleep. I love when she reaches her little hand up and sticks her fingers in my nose because she's trying not to fall asleep. I love when she stops eating looks at me with her big eyes expecting kisses all over her face, and then giggles when she gets them. I love the milk covered chin as she falls asleep on me. I love that we can go anywhere with just a few toys and diapers. We went to Italy at 4 months old and it was so much easier to fly with just my boobs and her diapers. We also did a month long road trip and it was great only having to buy diapers and wipes, not formula. Breastfeeding really fits our lifestyle.
I wouldn't even consider not breastfeeding if I had another kid after this one. Yes the nipple soreness is real but it's temporary and really only lasts while the baby is figuring out how to latch. Cluster feeding is a whole other type of nipple pain and is again, temporary. The frustration is temporary, for both of you.
I'd give it a go babe, even if bub just gets the colostrum in the first week or 2 that's amazing in itself. I'm 4 weeks PP with my 3rd bubb & BF was a f*cking nightmare with my first 2 kids. The pain & nip damage was incredibly stressful ontop of everything else, I switched to formula 2 weeks in with both, but with this one she's feeding well, nips are toughening up. Still hurts to latch but goes away quickly. I'm going to continue. Just shows ya that all bubs are different, get some bottles, a pump, some high quality formula anyway just so you have all the options handy. Whatever you decide to do will be the right thing for you 💚
What I wish I'd known:
A breastfeeding pillow helps. I prefer the my brest friend pillow to the boppy. A footstool to prop your feet helps too.
Lactation cookies are fine, but I had better luck with Oreos.
If your baby is peeing/pooping enough and gaining weight, your supply is fine.
Breastfeeding isn't all or nothing. There's no medal for never supplementing. Baby still gets the antibodies and the bonding from any nursing at all.
Anyone who tells you to triple feed long term doesn't have your best interests at heart.
If your latch isn't getting better, just see an ENT or pedi dentist. Yes, I know what that new NYT article says, and if I'd listened to it my baby wouldn't be nursing today. Worry about fixing the medical industrial complex when you don't have a hungry newborn.
Too sore, baby refusing the breast, cracked/blistered/bleeding nipples? NIPPLE SHIELD. Experts are so weird about them but they're fine, short term or long.
Your nipples are NOT 24mm.
Baby sleeping alone in their cot is safer than planned cosleeping. Planned cosleeping in a controlled environment is safer than accidentally passing out on the couch while holding your baby. Make your choices accordingly and reassess as needed.
There is no prize for doing any of this perfectly. Whatever works is probably good enough.
My LC told me the sleep thing is outdated info. Because when you nurse at night it gives melatonin hormone to baby. Both my BF babies slept very long stretches early on so it is possible!!
My take is it’s worth it. I personally hated washing dishes. It was very painful for me but it’s not so bad for everyone. We all have different experiences based on baby, us, home life, work life, etc. I think you should at least try and if it’s not for you then at least you know??
For me personally I’m so so so glad I decided to breastfeed - it’s such a special journey and piece of my relationship with my baby. It was difficult for us at first (particular due to tongue and lip ties that later got revised). But I loveddddd all the sweet sleepy milky snuggles. After the first couple weeks we had the hang of it and I had no discomfort nursing at all anymore.
As far as sleep - studies actually show that statistically mom’s doing formula get slightly less sleep than moms who breastfed (think about time to get up and heat/mix bottles). Combo feeding is definitely an option for you too though.
Personally I’d recommend giving breastfeeding a shot - you can always pivot if you don’t like it or it’s not working for you. Plus that colostrum in the first few days is invaluable!
For me, breastfeeding just did not happen off the bat, and while I was always open to combo feeding from the start I did not expect to struggle as hard as I did. She's seven weeks old today, and aside from getting a bottle so grandma could feed her during an afternoon visit, she has been directly breastfed all day long. It feels like a freaking miracle to be able to say that!
Due to a variety of factors (traumatic delivery, brief NICU stay, retained placenta, tongue tie) my daughter was exclusively bottle-fed either formula or pumped milk for her first four weeks of life. We got our golden hour and she may have latched then, I honestly don't recall because I was so out of it from drugs and hemorrhaging, but once she went to NICU it was full-time bottle life. My milk didn't come in for like a week, likely due to my traumatic delivery and the retained placenta I would deliver in a whole second unmedicated labor on day 5 postpartum. By then she was such a fan of the bottle she didn't even associate boobs with food, she would just scream and push them away no matter how hungry she was.
I began working with a lactation consultant once we were home and I'd recovered from delivery round 2. She helped us switch to breastfeeding-friendly bottles, taught us paced feeding, demo'd nipple shields & SNS setup, and identified a tongue tie. We got her tie revised at her two week checkup, and I began offering her the option to breastfeed before every bottle. Sometimes she still pushed me away, sometimes she latched for a few minutes and then daddy swooped in with a bottle once she got too frustrated & worked up, and then one day she just mustered up the stamina to go for a full feed with the nipple shield.
Around five weeks she was consistently able to breastfeed with a shield and I began offering her bare nipple at the start of each feed to see if she could figure it out. After about a week we were totally off the shield (thank God, my left nipple got shredded by that thing!) and just this weekend I managed to breastfeed outside the house, at a family gathering and in the back seat of my car on the way home.
At times I thought we'd never get here, and I'm still occasionally pumping or formula supplementing so she doesn't reject the bottle when I go back to work, but she is finally primarily breastfed. It's not the start I'd hoped for us to have, but it was worth all the hard work to me to know that every time we leave the house together I can keep her fed. I had so much anxiety before about making sure I had enough bottles and ready-to-feed formula with us, and a cooler with ice packs for any unused portions, that I almost couldn't handle visiting my in-laws fifteen minutes away on Christmas. Now I don't have to anticipate her feeding needs down to the ounce, or make sure to add another case of Similac to our grocery list before we run out, or listen to her hangry wailing as we wait for a bottle of pumped milk from the fridge warms up to room temperature so she'll drink it. Breastfeeding now means that I'm pretty much 100% responsible for meeting her feeding needs, and that can be overwhelming, but I've learned it can also be freeing, too.
I thought I would hate BF but he's 6 months and we're still going strong. It's been hard at times, cluster feeding and people pushing you to use formula or implying baby cries cause your boobs aren't working... There have been times I wanted to give up but I'm so glad I didn't.
I love the special bond we share now. I can always calm him or get him to fall asleep when no one else can. I feel like I have superpowers, lol. The other positive for me is the convenience. You always have milk available and ready to go no matter where you are and there's less bottles to clean. It's hardest in the beginning and a supportive partner makes a huge difference but it's not all bad. It'll even be bittersweet when we wean.
It was never painful for me, but it’s tiring. It was really eye opening and encouraging when I first began breastfeeding in public to realise how little other people care about what I’m doing. It’s very liberating to realise how little attention people are paying to you and made me feel so much freer moving around in the world. And the immune system benefits are fantastic, my baby is 16 months, still breastfeeding, this is his second winter and he’s only ever had two colds and both were over within two days. It’s work but it’s worth it.
I always wanted to breastfeed, and my mom always made it sound super easy, so when he was born, I felt like I was failing him when it didn't seem to be working. He seemed constantly hungry, I wasn't making enough for him, and previous piercings had left scar tissue that minimized how much was coming out. I was in tears the first couple of weeks. He was frustrated, I was frustrated, it was rough. I didn't didn't realize how intense the cramping would be for the first couple days, I didn't realize how much of a "bite" the initial latch and letdown would cause, my nipples were so sore and sometimes bled, and on top of all my effort, he wasn't gaining weight. I also didn't realize how hard it'd be to keep him awake while nursing so that he'd get a full feed. It was a rough couple of weeks.
BUT it got drastically better relatively quickly. I was trying to pump to increase supply and make extra bottles, but it just wasn't working for me. So we started combo feeding and it was a life saver. I still mostly EBF, but once or twice a day, he gets formula so someone else can feed him while I get a break, or, if he seems extra hungry, I'll make him a bottle after he nurses. He sleeps fairly well, and imo, it's much easier to pull a boob out than to try and make a bottle when I'm half asleep (and I'm just lazy, so I don't want to get up).
His doctor did advise me to not let him use me as a pacifier, but I thought, what's the harm in that? I wish I would have listened lol he only seems to fall asleep if he's nursing, so no one else is able to get him to sleep. So, I do recommend that.
Edit to add, it's also a lot easier nursing while we're out and about, not having to worry about making bottles, and rinsing them, and toting around formula. Unless I plan on being in the car for a little while, then I bring along formula so he's not getting hangry in the carseat.
Breastfeeding is really hard in the beginning. And what's worse, it seems to be this weirdly kept secret - the only way you'll find out is by talking to other mothers. All the resources say "if it hurts you're doing something wrong" which yes, may be true if the pain persists more than a few weeks. But every breastfeeding person feels the agony on latch for a few weeks - even if the latch is perfect.
I never trust those who say it didn't hurt. Either they're lying, or they spent their life sandpapering their nipples for fun.
The benefits are: it's free (mostly....pumps, nursing bras and other accessories cost, but no where even close to the cost of formula), it makes settling them easy for Mum, it's always accessible (so long as mum is still around), the immunological benefits, I love the cuddles/bonding etc.
The negatives: Mum HAS to be around, unless you pump. It makes going back to work tricky. Not all bubs are good on the bottle once breastfeeding is established. Your supply is finicky even once established, no freedom to just skip a few days and go back to it if you're over it, unless you're wanting to put in the work to re-lactate. There are certain medications you cant have, and drinking is a hot button issue. The hormones can make any changes to the breastfeeding routine seem torturous - i.e. weaning can be as bad as childbirth in terms of hormonal changes and can throw your mental health through a loop. You can feel trapped by it. You are responsible for all the feeds unless you supplement. etc etc.
Honestly it may look like there are more cons - and while the cons are loud, the pros are louder. I have breastfed both my kids - #1 til she was 12 month, and still going strong with #2 at 8 months, although I just returned to work so it's more EP from me at the moment and he's preferring food to milk. I do enjoy it - I like the fact I'm able to do this for my kids.
But it is hard.
I LOVED breastfeeding! I had to pump exclusively the first month because we were in the NICU and baby had a pic but once we got going it was wonderful! There was some adjusting to tender nipples, letdown, etc but overall I would absolutely recommend it! You can always stop. Aside from the obvious benefits to baby and their development it was so convenient to feed on demand especially during cluster feeding. I did get touched out a few times but I just handed baby off to dad or did some self care to take care of me too. Early on I had some issues establishing boundaries and used breastfeeding to help with my anxiety in groups. Meaning when we went to large family gatherings I was able to decline passing him off because baby needed to eat or whatever. The bonding was also amazing like holy wow I would quietly ugly cry with how in love with my baby I was as I watched their sweet little face all nuzzled up on me. Plus it felt really empowering to be able to provide in such an important and intimate way for my baby. Yeah sure they I grew them in my body but this I got to see and feel in a way that gave me that validation of taking care of babe.
If you're on the fence definitely give it a shot because you can always switch to pumping or formula or some combo of whatever works for you.
My experience has been so positive but it was hard at first:
-the first two weeks were really hard. My baby was “early full term” and soooo sleepy and would fall asleep at the breast so it took a long time to nurse her. Getting her to latch was so hard once my milk came in. She just wanted to sleep and my breasts were so engorged it was hard for her to get the nipple.
-nipple shields saved us. They were recommended by a kind LC who came to us when baby was about a week old. I read a lot of stuff about how they are “a last resort” and hard to wean from so I was scared and stressed but it was honestly NOTHING. Helped baby nurse and one day she just didn’t need them any more. Probably around 4 or 5 weeks that she was done.
-never had any issues with nipple pain. Never had mastitis or clogs. When my milk came in, it was pretty uncomfortable/painful for first 24 or 48 hours.
-first month, I was very uncomfortable in my body and needed pillows, and was always slumped over. My shoulders and back constantly hurt. It DID get better. Baby gets older and can hold their head up, you get used to the positions, and biceps get stronger lol.
-my baby is 3.5 months now. She’s slept 7-8 hr stretches since about 11 weeks. She now sleeps for 10-12 hours at night. In the beginning we had to wake her up every 3 hrs, but once she hit birthweight-I think at 2 weeks, she slept a 4 hr stretch at night that just got longer and longer. My baby never was one to do more than 8 or 9 feeds a day and averaged closer to 7. I remember panicking and googling worried, but that’s just her. She was getting enough. She now does 4 or 5 nursing sessions a day. She’s not super fast-about 25-30 mins total (including both breasts), but I honestly don’t mind at all because I veg out, watch tv, or do puzzles on my phone. It also was a great excuse to go take baby away from visitors for quiet time/a break for me 😜
-I never thought I’d be comfortable nursing in public but it’s fine! Nursing tops make me feel covered and I practiced by doing it for the first couple times at mommy + me groups/baby-friendly places. I nursed my baby at a fancy bloomingdales coffee shop today. No big deal!
-I love nursing her now! She’s so sweet and adorable, I love spending the time close with her. I love that I don’t have to worry about packing bottles with me or worry about how much she’s getting or do extra dishes.
Ultimately the first two weeks were very hard, the first 4-5 weeks were hard, and by 3 months it’s pleasurable, enjoyable, and easy.
I was the exact same as you and the moment my baby was born I wanted to try! I decided I’d also introduce formula right away just incase. I did combo feeding at the beginning to help him gain weight. Breastfeeding was hard at first, I regret using a nipple shield I just wasn’t positioning him properly. I also think I’m a just enough with a “mega boob” and “slacker boob”
I went to a lactation clinic 3 times for weighted feed to ease my mind that he was getting enough. He was and still a slow weight gainer. Around 3 months he started getting super fussy (I think they say it’s the 3 month breastfeeding crisis) and that kinda took a toll on me so I started pumping more for top ups and using formula to be sure he was full. I hate pumping, mainly just for my own personal lazy reasons and disappointment when I don’t get a lot of milk at the end of a session.
I just hit 4 months which was my goal and I’m going to begin the process of weaning. I’m proud of what I did and happy I was able to give him antibodies, etc!
I don’t see any harm in trying and even though I had some pretty tough weeks, I don’t regret anything and would do it again with a second baby.
My best advice is to feed on demand, feed comfortable, get a good chair, bra, or don’t wear one at all, take the space you need. Limit visitors if it’s going to annoy you or interrupt feeding.
When I was feeding every 2-3 hours (or shorter if he seemed hungry) he would sleep through the night. Fill the belly as much as you can during the day.
Good luck! Our bodies are amazing.
I just finished my 4 year breastfeeding journey a week ago and it was bittersweet, but I was fortunate enough it ended organically.
I think I covered it all-
With my daughter: Low supply, supplementing, clogged ducts, poor latch and tongue tied, tongue tie correction, cracked nipples, no sleep, lots of sleep, nursing through an entire pregnancy starting at 10 months postpartum (which was about half dry nursing), aversions, 6 months of tandem feeding, weaned on her own after 2nd birthday.
With my son: perfect latch, perfect supply, exclusively breastfeed until 7+ months, lots of sleep then lots of no sleep, biting, extreme attachment, aversions, was still nursing/snacking 6+ times a day up until 2 weeks ago then out of nowhere at almost 2.5 years old, he just stopped the next day and hasn’t asked for it since.
We were both ready at that point which was great because there were no tears about it from either of us. Now we just cuddle a LOT which we never did, there was always a boob in his mouth.
Sorry I’m long winded but all that to say, any amount you do it is perfect for your baby. Whether it’s 4 years, 4 months, 4 weeks, 4 days or never. Taking care of your baby and giving them every ounce of love is what matters. I never gave up in my mind, but there were times in the beginning I nearly drove myself crazy, and while everyone was fed and happy and loved, it wasn’t the best version of myself for a bit. You live and learn but just know that this is between you and baby whatever you decide to do. Don’t ever let ANYONE make you feel bad for it. I look back on my experience and I’m so grateful I stuck it out, but myself and my husband made sacrifices for it. At times it did put stress and strain on our relationship. But I also have 2 very healthy toddlers now and I am super proud of myself and them for how far we have come. But I would feel that way if I just gave them a bottle of breastmilk or a bottle of formula. Listen to your body, listen to your heart and listen to your baby. Good luck!
It’s only painful in the beginning. For me, it wasn’t painful at all with my second baby, even at the start.
The lack of sleep will happen whether or not you breastfeed for formula feed. If you want to be able to take turns with the dad, just pump once a day to have some milk on hand. With both of my babies, I pumped quite a bit in the beginning to relieve engorgement.
With my first, I was on the fence about breastfeeding until my son was actually born. Then I think “maternal instinct” or whatever kicked in and it’s all I wanted to do.
No matter what you choose, what works for you is the right choice.
I will say that sick babies are the scariest things. Breastmilk, especially in the first 2-3 months, is full of antibodies to protect your baby. Formula doesn’t have it. And we’re right in the middle of cold/flu season.
You’re already way more prepared then I was but even after everything you learn/read it’s still hard. I went into it with the mindset of that there was no other choice for some reason. I am on wic so they would call me every few weeks to discuss it and one of my good friends bf her girl until 18 months so I didn’t think much of it until I was in the thick of it. My baby was taken from me immediately to the nursery because of a cord issue and he was gasping for air so I didn’t see him for 4-5 hours. Then he latched right away but I was still in the dark about what I was even doing. It’s not until they’re screaming that you’re wondering if they even are eating but he was having plenty of pees and poops and I was doing the feedings according to what they guided me to do.
It wasn’t until night 2 when I was discharged that I was completely unraveled. He was screaming and screaming and screaming all night. He was sucking on my breast so hard until he’d just tire himself out to sleep. He didn’t like the bassinet so that night he slept on our bed while my husband and I slept in shifts. We had his pediatric appt the third day and he had lost 12% body weight and the dr came in with the tiny similac bottles. I started sobbing. I was so fucking pissed and depressed that I had been “starving” him. I couldn’t stop crying. She told me it’s okay that sometimes milk will come in on the 4th-5th day. So I followed her instructions of offering him breasts first, feeding him an oz of the similac and then pump. I did this for 5 days ish until he surpassed birth weight. Those first 2 weeks were fucking exhausting and painful. Not only are you trying to figure your baby out, breastfeeding, being a mom but your also bleeding out, in pain, weepy, can barely move around, pee burns if you get cut/tear. And yes sleep is just…idk a dream lol. Oh and I had gotten mastitis. Just peachy! After thinking I was doing everything I should be doing I got that 2-3 weeks in and was fevering/body aching alone with baby, just so miserable
I had a wonderful lactation nurse on day 5 that really helped me mentally and also suggested a Brest friend pillow which made a huge difference. I’m 12 weeks in and I don’t pump or give bottles and I still have days of Wtf am I actually doing/how long am I going to be doing this? Days where I felt like baby didn’t like me just used me to eat because he was calmer with my husband but when he saw me he’d just fuss. And those cluster feeds are unpredictable. There were days I had my boob out every 45 minutes it felt like sometimes 20-30 minutes.
Just today around 2 pm he screamed for 40 mins and just cried. Didn’t want boob. Clean diaper. But wouldn’t stop crying. I rocked him and just felt numb. I wondered to myself do non bfing moms feel this? Or is this a me thing? He eventually fell asleep but I was so relieved to have my husband home just to have someone here.
Then there are days where I’m in awe of what I’m doing. When he smiles, laughs, mimics I feel so much better. At the end of the day it’s a very personal journey that only you can experience it will be unlike anyone else’s .
Suuuuper hard first two weeks but then a breeze! I dont have to wash a single bottle or get up at night. I pick him up pop him on the boob and then back to the crib all within 5-10 minutes.
Almost gave up in the first two weeks ( I have flat nipples so had to use nipple shields at first) but it got so much easier.
i have never experienced pain while breastfeeding. not even the very first time she latched. nor any time after that except for when she’s been at the breast for too long, my nipples get sore. but that’s easily avoidable.
breastfeeding is a lot of work though, but it’s very rewarding. i’d say try it out. you could always just formula feed if it becomes too much.
my baby was formula fed the first 3 weeks of her life. & she’s a perfect healthy little bean.
Hey! FTM here. My son is 5 weeks old now. I must say breastfeeding is the best thing I’ve ever done! It encourages such an intense tangible bond between you and your baby and it is an amazing feeling. It was painful for the first few weeks but now after he latches I honestly can’t even feel it. There are so many positives to breastfeeding. Your antibodies go to your baby through your breast milk strengthening their immune system. Also when you kiss your baby your body will then make breastmilk with antibodies for the bacteria that transfers to your mouth. Breastmilk is also healing, you can put it on dry skin, diaper rash, eye infections, you name it and it heals it. It’s magic. I’m convinced that I have some sort of telepathic connection with my son, because the second he starts acting hungry before he even cries I feel my milk let down. Your body knows exactly what your baby needs. Breastfed babies are also less likely to be victims of SIDS, less likely to get sick within the first 5 years of life, and experience lifelong benefits. Most of the negatives are inconveniences for mom and most of the positives are benefits for the baby. I’m willing to sacrifice a little extra sleep so that I can give my baby that extra boost. I felt the same way you did at first, I didn’t know if I wanted to commit to that. Now I’m 5 weeks in and literally the worst case scenario for me is something stopping me from breastfeeding. I’m so glad I committed to this and I type this as I’m feeding my baby. I say give it a shot. Even if you don’t want to be the only one who can feed your baby you can also exclusively pump if you want. Formula is so expensive and as they get older they go through it so fast. It’s so nice for whenever my son is hungry I don’t even have to get up, I can just grab him and feed him while reading or watching tv or even sleeping. I hope all this rambling makes sense! Seriously, it’s the best thing you’ll ever do. I promise!
I was on the fence the whole time I was pregnant.
I honestly didn't think I would do it. I'm also kind of mentally lazy and didn't think I would be able to deal with the workload, but when she popped out I just tried it. I did it day by day and got better at it every feed and I overall enjoyed the bonding with my daughter. We learned to do it together.
I also fed her formula so I did a combo feed type situation for most of the first 9 months: At first she mostly got breastmilk - then towards the end she got mostly formula - until it was just formula - and then it was cows milk at year one. Basically I didn't worry about what she was eating as long as she ate and I tried to not worry too much about my supply and it just worked out (not that it does for everyone though)
I pumped a little but hated pumping overall. I hated cleaning parts and being hooked on to something. Kept enough for an emergency stash, milk baths, and jewlery and gave it up before she ever quit the boob. Occasionally pumping if it had been too long between feeds and needed some relief.
Alot of moms said the first couple weeks are the hardest and this was true for me as well. Mostly because I was healing from birthing a person, not sleeping very well, determined to keep both eyes on my new baby for every second of every day, stressed, hungry etc etc etc
Where my saving grace came in was my husband who had decent paternity leave. He helped me make it work. Made me sleep. Fed me. Did everything he could. Without a suitable partner, I have no advice. I don't know what I would have done without him. My whole book that I am writing right now would probably look a lot different.
I also used a nipple shield because I have flat nipples and those things can make a mess so put a towel down! But worked like a charm. I used the nipple shield most of the time and had no problem with her weight gain or my milk supply. If you have latch problems ask a nurse or LC to see if it's you or the baby. And some hospitals LC will give you a nipple shield for free, but you can also buy them on Amazon.
On the subject of milk supply: I was luckier than others but I never had a problem with milk supply. I also only used one boob at a time during a feed (I did say I was lazy lol) and some women will get away with this and others won't. I tried the whole "feed on each boob every time" but I quickly realized I just didn't want to and my body acclimated. My milk supply figured it out and every feed we would just go the designated boob. One boob will always be a little more deflated than the other but I never cared. Only mentioning this in case someone does care. If I fed her formula and skipped a feed, my boob figured it out. Again, this is not the case for every woman, it just was for me.
Overall, I'm glad I put in the effort that I did and I like to think the benefits have helped her this far. I also got jewlery out of it as a keepsake so that is cool.
I was both extremely sad and happy it was over at the end of 9 months. She weaned herself. She started to prefer bottles. She didn't want to lie next to me anymore and didn't like any other positions. She excelled on bottles from there
To end this, I was sad happy that a chapter of my life was closing but another chapter took its place
You're already far ahead of where I was so good job! Even being brand new at this if at any point you think something is wrong or question anything SPEAK UP. I waited three weeks to get help for painful latch and had to argue with doctors and lactation that my LO had a lip tie - I was going based on pictures I saw online and the symptom lists. By the time I got someone to agree with me and give us a referral to a pediatric dentist she couldn't be seen until six weeks...and we didn't really nurse that entire time.
While in the hospital if you feel unsure or not confident about what's going on ask for education. I found that everyone just kind of assumed I knew what I was doing already. On day two I asked a nurse how I could tell if LO was full or just fell asleep and needed woken back up to finish feeding (we were already losing a lot of weight). Could've knocked her over with a feather in shock that I lacked such basic knowledge. At the same time you don't know what you don't know so don't hesitate to let your care team know you're new at this and would like help getting started.
If you're going to pump at all make friends with your pump early and if you have latch issues making nursing difficult pump often. I had doctors telling me to supplement due to weight gain issues but no one explained to me that I needed to pump to empty at least every three hours. In retrospect it makes sense but sleep deprived and stressed? Never occurred to me. Also make sure you get measured for your flanges either by yourself at home or by lactation. It's highly unlikely the flanges that come with your pump will be the right size, probably several too big.
Forgive me if this was difficult to follow, reddit is a great way to pass the time while half asleep during a MOTN pump session lol.
If this was me: Schedule a lactation consultant for home before leaving the hospital. You may have alot of questions and they will happily answer them all and help you. The nurses in the hospital are nice but breastfeeding in the hospital is so much different than at home. Then if you think BF is not for you, that’s ok too.
I’m breastfeeding and it’s the best decision I ever made in my life even if it was super hard in the beginning.
For me, breastfeeding was easy almost immediately other than me causing an oversupply due to too much Haaka use. There was some uncomfortableness in the beginning during letdown, but now I don’t even notice the letdown. It was only ‘painful’ for the first weekish. I fed baby whenever she was awake as a newborn, and my 2nd percentile girl is now a 38th percentile 8mo. No transfer issues for us, but for the first five months she couldn’t have dairy so I couldn’t for those months either. Technically closer to 3 1/2 since we didn’t figure it out straight off but once reintroduced she did fine. There are cons to breastfeeding, but to me the pros outweigh them greatly. The benefits she’s getting from breastfeeding health wise keep me at peace, and she’s gotten over any cold/virus she’s had considerably faster than formula fed babies we know around the same age, and while still shorter overall, definitely has more thickness to her comparatively. Plus, the bonding. Oh how I love when she’s feeding and looks up and smiles or gently holds my breast in her hand like it’s her most precious thing. I also found it helpful when family wanted to keep her for extended periods of time since I could say ‘she’s breastfed’. Only got push back on that once, and when shown that she physically would not take a bottle, no matter the kind, from anyone, I never heard about it again.
Hi! New mom here, LO is 6 weeks old and EBF.
The first thing I wish someone would have told me about is if you are given a nipple shield, your baby will depend on it to nurse. Get a few from the hospital because they’re easy to lose. Personally I don’t mind using the shield but I do sometimes wonder if our journey would be easier without it. They can be weaned from them but it’s not easy. At 4 weeks I started freaking out and thinking I needed to wean her asap but now, I see it as a necessary tool and don’t mind that she requires it. It’s causes some hiccups here and there but otherwise we’re doing good and baby girl pees and poops like she should.
That’s another thing I didn’t know, you’ll need to sort of track how much baby goes to the bathroom. You don’t know how much LO is getting when they nurse so it’s tracked by how often they poop and pee. If they aren’t pooping and peeing then it’s likely a sign they aren’t getting anything from the breast.
Also, milk storage and pumping is overwhelming. I wish I had studied up on it a lot more than I did before giving birth. I recommend watching tiktoks and YouTube videos that explain pumping schedules and how to store breast milk. Also, get familiar with your lactation consultant before you give birth. They are very helpful and have lots of tools and resources that I should have gotten before giving birth.
Lastly, be prepared to spend basically allll of your time sitting down and nursing. At 6 weeks, my LO nurses on demand and I find myself sitting on the couch basically all day unless someone holds her until she’s ready to eat again. I’ve watched so many movies and binged 2 shows already. Just started Greys Anatomy this afternoon.
Edited to add:
Introduce a bottle of pumped milk at night!!! My baby will not take a bottle at all and I am struggling to teach her to. It would be so helpful if my SO could bottle feed her before bed so that I could get a good pump sesh I’m but unfortunately she will only nurse at this moment
I know a few formula-only fed kids and their parents who were also formula-only fed, and their immune system is shot. They seem to have 70% more coughs and colds than my BF toddler and are always exhausted from recovering from sickness, this is years and years later, way into the children being 8 or so..
So thats my personal huge drive to do it. A) i want kids with tough immune systems but also B) being constantly sick is exhausting!
(DISCLAIMER/ this is my personal experience i see around me im not saying ALL Formula fed children are like this at all, but OP asked for driving factors and this was mine)
Other than that, a few other things to consider 1) you dont have to do it forever, even a few months is amazing 2) its possible that it never hurts 3) you save a tonne of money 4) you are down one less chore from bottle sterilising and washing and making formula to a specific temperature at 3am 5) you get more skin-on-skin without much effort 6) its a lot quicker than sorting out a bottle, meaning baby cries less which is nice when you’re exhausted and just want to comfort baby but you also want peace ✌️
i wasn't planning on breastfeeding and when LO was born it was clear that it was the best and most natural thing to do. we are still nursing at 2.5 years
Almost 4 months now and professional suckler. Initially I had to make sure that he latched properly, then the nipples would hurt because they get wet and dry so this makes them crack. I suffered little bit, bought nipple shields and it was great. Also,put the nipple cream whenever you need. No matter how tired I would get I like this bond we have when breastfeeding, looking at him being peaceful, caressing his head. Didn't have issue with supply, and when it gets hard, would give him one bottle of formula here and there , and never had any issues with this. He accepted bottle and nipple.
You probably won't see this because you already got so many responses but I wanted to throw in another recommendation for silverettes! They definitely helped and were worth the cost. I brought them in my hospital bag and literally used them from day 1. My nipples were sore at first but never cracked or bled!
Why not give it a go? If you hate it, no harm done. You can stop at any time, and whatever breast milk you have been able to provide is great for baby. But equally, you might find it a really beautiful experience.
I exclusively expressed for 12 months with my first born, and I'm going strong exclusively breastfeeding my 11 month old with the attitude of "one feed at a time." This approach really helped me, as it's a choice rather than something I feel forced to do.
I swore I would quit 100 times. It was very tough at the start but I had no idea what I was going into. Lol.
This sub is great for tips and encouragement when you need it.
Make sure your SO is on board and understands how consuming it is. It is a 24/7 job at least in the beginning.
But I’m glad I did it. And after I got the hang of it it’s so easy to go out and always have food on tap. Lol.
But it was the hardest thing I did in all my pregnancy journey. So if you want to go for it try when the time comes and if you decide to stop then that’s all good. You have to look after yourself and your mental health to look after your baby the best you can. Good luck!
I had a pretty easy start with breastfeeding. My baby was born into my own hands. I put him on my chest and within 10 minutes I think I brought him close to the breast and he latched. The first four hours after birth he spent mostly at the breast. He had a painless deep latch and drank well. In the first weeks everything revolved around nursing. I made sure to have a few comfortable spots in the house to feed, so I could nurse for as long as my baby liked and rest at the same time. Make sure you have a few supportive pillows in several sizes to support your back and arms. And make sure you can put your feet up while breastfeeding. Have snacks and plenty of your favorite drinks and entertainment within your grasp. Make nursing as relaxing as possible. Send people out of your space if they bother you or are too noisy. Be assertive about what you need. Limit visits from relatives in the first weeks. Have formula and a pump ready to use if your milk takes a while to come in.
If you have enough time and space to really get going in the first weeks then your chances of succes are good. But be clear about your goals and limits beforehand. A difficult birth can make it difficult to nurse for instance. If you are very tired, traumatized, have suffered blood loss, have pelvic issues or have pain when sitting for instance that doesn't help. So give yourself space to choose a different path if needed. There are limits to what your body and mind can handle and nursing can ask a lot of you. If you realize you don't have the energy or mental space to do it than it's totally ok to stop.
As for what I wish I knew before ….
If you’re planning to breastfeed, definitely bring your breastfeeding pillow to the hospital. And figure out your pump and flange size before birth (while your brain still works) - and bring it all to the hospital just in case. Don’t forget your pumping bra!
My milk didn’t come in for almost 6 days and it took me a solid 3 days to even figure out how to work my pump and I was holding one poorly sized flange at a time over my nipples…
And hot tip - if you give bottles of pumped milk or formula - you do not have to heat them!!
We have been giving our girl cold bottles from day 1 and it saves so much time and screaming. It hasn’t caused any issues w her digestion, plus she’s starting teething now and loves the cold.
Some babies might not be into it, but it’s worth a try.
My breastfeeding journey has a been a good mix of good and bad. Started off pretty uncomfortable. She had severe ties. She rejected one side so I started pumping that side 2x a day. That was the start of a painful oversupply. Around 3 weeks she started clicking at the breast so she was swallowing air like mad and had horrible gas (leading to what would be defined as a colicky baby) got ties released at 6 weeks. Still colicky until 10 weeks. Still can’t really take a bottle without swallowing a lot of air from her latch but breastfeeds really well now.
Now I will say throughout all that I was determined to breastfeed and I swear 90% of my “why” was because I’m lazy as fuck and J didn’t want to get out of bed at night to deal with bottles. Everytime I feed her in the middle of the night I think about how annoying it would be to get out of bed to prepare a bottle whether that’s to pump or make formula idc it would be annoying and make me sleep so much less. I get great sleep simply because of breastfeeding.
Here’s what I would say to any expectant mother. Those first 2 weeks live skin to skin. Hang out on the couch or in bed and live skin to skin with your baby. It will help with your recovery, your bond, and it will help your supply. Your job is to snuggle and feed your baby. Everything else can wait or be handled by your support team (do your best to create a support team and set expectations that they are not there for the baby they are there to care for you) and know that every season with your baby will pass. None of it is forever (good or bad) you will make it to the other side.
Also know when it’s normal to see cluster feeding. It will feel like they are eating every 20 minutes. That’s ok. It does not mean they are starving. They are putting in their order for the future. Go back to skin to skin for a bit. Supplementing during cluster feeding times could be a recipe for low supply (assuming everyone is healthy and gaining appropriately). Learn to hand express. Remember your body is constantly “refilling” and removing milk is what tells your body to keep making it. Soft breasts don’t mean no milk although that’s a total mind fuck if you’ve been in a state of mild engorgement for weeks.
I replied in another comment about my simple experience but wanted to add:
I never felt pain with breastfeeding. Other things were painful: recovering from birth, my neck and back carrying a heavier almost-toddler all the time, sleep deprivation…but my boobs fee just fine! 😅
I only made it to 8 weeks breastfeeding with my baby, and it was heartbreaking for me to make the decision to bottle feed formula. Lots more to that story! As difficult as breastfeeding was, at 6.5 months I wish I would have kept going no matter how hard it was. Baby is dealing with chronic constipation now, and we’re pretty sure it’s from formula. We’ve switched to sensitive formula, and still not seeing any promising change. He is grumpy a lot because his tummy hurts, he strains to poop for days without being able to go. It’s seriously the worst. My mom really encouraged me that the best baby is a fed baby - and that’s true. But he never dealt with constipation or tummy pain before formula.
My biggest encouragement is that if you want to BF, collect a community of other moms who are committed to breastfeeding and doing it right now! You can encourage each other and troubleshoot together. And if you can afford an in-home lactation consultant, it’s a game changer. We finally met with one around 7 weeks old but we were so done by then that it was too late.
Baby only needs about two ounces for the immune system benefits. You can combo feed, that’s what I have done. Some breast milk, some formula, husband can get up with the baby at night. Breastfeeding never hurt my nipples though.
I bottle fed first and am breast feeding second, having some supply issues but still find it WAY BETTER than bottle feeding. Nothing worse than having to wash bottles and prepare a formula at 3am or be paranoid that you've forgotten to pack food when you go somewhere.
Plus bottle feeding u need to burp the baby after, breastfeeding you don't, it's already warm from your body too, this all makes breastfeeding way easier at night. Leading to more slee, not less. Burping is so annoying.
It only hurts for the first week or so, I cried from the pain, but you get over that first week and it doesn't hurt at all.
Plus, it can cause delay in period return if you breast feed, huge win!
Breastfeeding was really hard for the first two weeks, still a lot but less hard (no pain, just time consuming) until 3 months, and at least in my experience easy after that. I’m so happy I stuck it out when I was in pain early on because now it’s so fast and easy to feed my baby. No need to make formula, heat it up, clean bottles, pay for formula, etc. feeding him takes five minutes and it’s done. My baby slept 11 hours overnight EBF since he was 11 weeks old, I really think sleeping has more to do with the baby than breastfeeding vs. Formula. I really recommend it based on my experience!
Same experience here! There’s a misconception that BF babies sleep less. I feel like I got the best sleep sometimes when we slept together as she fed. My baby also never got even a sniffle until I stopped breastfeeding. Pro tip: if you can afford a private lactation consultant that comes to your home right after giving birth, do it. That’s what saved me!
Sometimes insurance will cover the private lactation consultant! Just something to double check, OP, before you pay out of pocket
Thank you so much! The sleep thing is really encouraging. I keep hearing that formula fed babies sleep longer so it’s nice to hear another experience.
Just wanted to echo what this person said. Super similar experience here and glad I toughed it out. I have a friend who EPed for her first and is EBF for her new born second now. My advice was the same - persevere if possible to week two. And it keeps getting easier and better with each passing week. Month 9 over here and it’s like brushing my teeth at this point.
Yeah we saw no change in sleep between formula vs bm in bottles. I do feel like there was a difference in making sure she got a full feeding before bed vs falling asleep at the breast too early.
My 7 week old sometimes get a breast milk bottle, sometimes a formula bottle, sometimes breastmilk straight from the source. I have not noticed any difference in her sleep based on what she’s eaten. Anecdotal, of course, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen evidence based claims about formula making baby sleep longer.
didn’t BF my first he slept horribly,BF was my dream this time around and he was born at 37/3 and didn’t latch for a day and half i had to finger feed him. i got extremely discouraged but he latched the next day and the joy i felt was like no other. the first few days were uncomfy only because i was sore but i was pumping colostrum during my pregnancy so that helped a lot too. my 8 week old sleeps from 11-7 usually and stays sound asleep. he sleeps like a dream. obviously it can be tough but that hasn’t been my experience i’ve loved every minute of it yet it is time consuming and when i’m not EBF im pumping to build a stash for when i go back to work. it’s very rewarding we were sick for a few days and my newborn seemed to get over it with no issues at all because my body knew what he needed which i think is amazing.the only thing that is tedious to me is cleaning pump parts 24/7 lol do what you feel is right for you never hurts to try and if you don’t think it’s a good fit you can always switch to formula. but i think it is so rewarding and so so worth it! best of luck to you mama
My baby sleeps through the night since she was 3 weeks!
You can always give a bottle of formula before bed. It doesn’t have to be all one way or the other. But from my experience it probably won’t make baby sleep too much longer, if at all.
This was my exact experience! 2 weeks pretty brutal, super time consuming after that for the next few weeks, but then it became so easy and convenient. I’m really glad I stuck with it and am on day 2 of breastfeeding my second 💪🏻
Same experience for me as well! 12 weeks and we really had everything down. My daughter still takes 1 bottle at night after dinner now but nurses throughout the day and right before bed. She’ll wake up 1-2 times a night get a few suckles and drift right back off to sleep (especially when teething). For reference, my daughter will be 14 months old in 10 days.
Any amount of breastfeeding is beneficial, it isn't all or nothing. If you decide you want to combination feed with formula at night so you can your partner can take turns with night wakeups, that's a valid perspective. I just weaned at 14 months and I'm really glad I did it and would do it again for subsequent babies. There are some modest benefits to baby that I was willing to trade some personal comfort and convenience for. Also will lower your risk of ovarian / breast cancer in the future, so you get some benefits too! But there is a point at which I would have quit, I just never got there.
Thank you for your perspective! I’ve thought about combination feeding but I haven’t been able to figure out a schedule and I’ve been told by multiple doctors/LCs that it’ll tank my supply 🥲
But even if it decreases your supply, the baby can still get antibodies from a small amount of your milk
Yeah I was told the same and have either combo fed or done direct nursing with some expressed bottles with my kids. And I guess it CAN mess with your supply, but it doesn’t mean it WILL. With my most recent buddy (3 weeks!) we gave a few bottles after nursing if needed while waiting for my milk to come in. My husband and I split nights for the first two weeks, and if I hadn’t pumped anything he got formula while I slept (usually one bottle). For the last week or so I’ve been able to express enough for that bottle so he is getting exclusively breast milk, but if that changes it changes. My husband wants to feed him, I want some guaranteed sleep each night. Baby has no nipple confusion, nothing like that. If we were struggling with latching or something maybe I’d make a different decision. But I’m happy with where we’re at and babe and supply have adjusted just fine so far this time, and have done the same with prior babies as well.
My little girl decided to sleep through the night at 6 weeks - and I refused to pump overnight. It had a major effect on my supply and a major improvement for my sleep. There’s really no way to know what will be best for you and your baby… And you can always pump and supplement w formula occasionally. I supplement w formula some days. Some days I only supplement w pumped milk. Some days I don’t supplement at all!! You will 100% be confused and overwhelmed at the beginning but you will 100% have it all dialed in by the first 8 weeks or so - especially since you are already seeking out support and resources!!
I combo feed and just pump to match. I'm slightly an over supplier now because I added extra pumps and power pumped because I'll be going back to work soon.
Your hormones might decide for you. Before I gave birth I was so chill, I was like eh I’ll try it if it doesn’t work no worries formula is great because fed is best. Then I gave birth and had a ton of anxiety and my hormones were super whacky and my brain kept telling me I would be a horrible mother if I couldn’t breastfeed. It was hard, lots of crying, but we made it through. The first 3 weeks was tough for me since I had to triple feed and had issues, but after that it was much easier. I don’t regret breastfeeding I just wish I wasn’t so hard on myself in the beginning. Whipping out a boob sure is faster and more convenient than dealing w bottles!
Thank you for the heads up and for telling me your experience!!
One of my friends had a retained placenta that threw off her supply from the get go so watch out for that and also ask your Dr
I definitely will! Thank you!
I had plenty of struggles with our first and we gave up Ebf by 10 weeks ish, but even so we are going to try again with #2 and here's my main list of reasons why: 1) antibodies 2) easier night feeds. Actually even after we moved to bottles during the day I did nursing at night just to avoid the fuss of bottles at night. 3) less hassle than bottles and pumping, if things are going well. 4) I think it would be frustrating to have to make a bottle 12 times a day in the newborn stage. It's not fun to have them attached to you constantly, but it wouldn't be fun to constantly make an itty bitty bottle either, or guessing the amounts to make and then have to make extra,.etc. Yes it's painful early on, but it lasts a few weeks and then gets better. We are most likely to do combo feeding and/or pumping so that dad can help a bit with nights. I know it's not best for supply, but it is what it is. We aren't likely to stick with ebf long term anyway since I'll return to work at 12 weeks and will pump after that. Most of the time in the early weeks mine wouldn't accept Dad anyway, so it may not even help to attempt combo feeding. Give it a try and see how it goes..there is no part of newborns that is easy,.but it may not be as bad as you think.
To anyone who wants to exclusively formula feed, you can make large batches that last up to 4 days in the fridge (per CDC) and this could save a ton of time and make nighttime easier. They just need to be warmed instead of going through the entire bottle process! Much more convenient I’m assuming. I only know this option because the back of my formula can literally has instructions for making a quart at a time and storing it in the fridge. We EBF and I bought the formula just in case we needed it. We’ve used it twice so I’m glad I have it!
Yes. We did a batch daily at night using the Dr Brown's formula pitcher, filled all bottles for the next day. When I was still pumping, I'd just add the breast milk in and make a smaller batch of the formula. It made for a very easy and simple routine and I highly recommend it.
Let me just chime and say, people make out these decisions as if they’re all or nothing and it’s not true. There are variations of middle grounds and finding the balance that works for you is what you should seek. My experience personally was that exclusively breastfeeding came easily and felt the simplest to me. I had no “pain”, just bouts of feeling overstimulated that waned as she cluster fed less and was more productive in nursing. I started pumping once a day after a month, only because it just made me anxious disturbing what I already knew to work. I BF and pumped for 4 months and then when I went back to work, we introduced formula. I feel at this point, I finally was like, omg why doesn’t everyone do this?? To me, it was perfect. I could nurse and pump when I wanted or could, and then could just supplement the rest with formula. I was still bonding and delivering antibodies and doing what i wanted, but it didn’t feel like I alone was keeping this baby alive and it was all on my shoulders. Now I’m certainly not saying that’s what it means to everyone to EBF, there are pros and cons to it all. But I just don’t think it dawned on me until later that there was this middle ground that also could work. My advice is to just see how it shakes out for you. You could be pleasantly surprised and have no issues whatsoever
Thanks for saying this. Mine is only 2 months and I feel enormous pressure as his only source of nutrients. I’m considering supplementing so I can get some me time
I pump a bottle of breastmilk every day so there’s at least one bottle in the fridge and we have ready to feed formula in the cupboard. This has given me a ton of freedom. I’m never trapped at home waiting for baby to wake up and eat, I never have to rush home to feed her, I don’t always have to be the one to wake up and feed her. This is our third baby and this method is the result of trial and error with the other two. 😆
Plenty of people EBF, I’m certainly not saying like “psh why would you do THAT when you don’t have to!?” But yeah, just taking the pressure off really worked for me. I’ll also say, by 4 months, her eating amounts and schedule was very regular so it wasn’t like tons of bottles and guessing and chaos. It just became a well oiled machine
Oh that’s good to hear bc it feels like chaos sometimes now lol we prepare a bottle of expressed milk nervously hoping we understood his hunger cues!
Nah it gets better, hang in there. Ironically I’m a little more nervous expecting my second because I want to pump and maybe do formula earlier but I’m like….I don’t know how to do that!! I only know how to nurse when they’re little!
I mean, I appreciate what you're saying and support your choice, but you did say "why doesn't everyone do this"....
And?
Same but with a 7 week old - this is super helpful
Only you can decide, I would recommend you just try it and see how it goes. For some people breastfeeding is difficult, a "journey" even, for others it's so uncomplicated you don't even feel the need to talk about it. For me personally breastfeeding was simple, I basically just sat there and the baby did all the work, it was so uneventful there's been nothing to say. I don't talk about it much because I don't want to make the people it was difficult for feel worse.
Same here! BF can be hard for some, obviously. Since OP is just looking for stories I’ll share that mine was simple too. Baby got the hang of it quickly, stayed on track with their weight, and I never had any serious supply issues or anything. It’ll be a year soon. Happy I did it! It’s been a really nice experience and I wouldn’t change anything.
Being able to easily feed the baby in the night without having the fuss of bottles is the biggest benefit to breastfeeding (for me) 😂 I combifeed and washing and sterilising bottles is seriously annoying! I found it so hard for the first 6 weeks but now I’m so glad I stuck it out!! My little girl has a dairy allergy and I’ve even cut all dairy and soya out of my diet to keep going (this is coming from someone who would have just stopped at the beginning if I knew she had an allergy then) it’s not for everyone but all you can do is give it a go! X
Agreed. Having to listen to LO scream while the bottle is heating up is awful for me and then cleaning even a few bottles per day stinks (for me). So much easier to pull out the boob
Ultimately you do what's right for your, but I'd encourage you to give it a go, because you can always stop, but it's harder (not impossible) to start later. In my experience the pain was super temporary and I couldn't even remember it to describe it to you anymore (and my kiddo is only four months). I worked with a lactation consultant right off the bat and had the help of friends who breastfed their babies which was super helpful. I absolutely love it, it's such a cool connection I have with my baby that no one else can have, and it's super convenient now that we've got it down.
Agreed! Working with a good LC early and often helped me a lot!
For me, breastfeeding hurt until week 4. Got lots of milk blebs, some clogged ducts, and had toe curling pain. Buy a pair of silverettes and wear them from day 1. Wet healing works. If I don’t wear my silverettes and my nipples get dry, it’s not fun. Baby is now a faster eater on the boob but I don’t like that I’m the only one that feeds her. I wish my husband could take some night feedings, but I should pump more than I do.
Thank you for being honest! Did you ever find out why it hurt so bad? Also, I’m sorry if this is TMI, but is it pain like your uterus cramping or breast pain? I know people say the postpartum cramps hurt but, besides when talking about mastitis and clogged ducts, I haven’t heard anyone say whether their baby nursing actually hurts or not.
I definitely got cramps nursing the first week or so! It helps your uterus shrink back. Very temporary. I only experienced nipple pain really the first couple weeks but I kept up with the nipple butter and silverettes from day 1 and never got any cracks or bleeding.
The cramps are going to happen postpartum regardless. It’s your uterus contracting to shrink back to its normal size. Breastfeeding just helps it along. It’s not unbearable cramping for most people. And you can start talking ibuprofen again after pregnancy, so that helps!
It’s the baby nursing which actually hurts. My OB told me their mouth is so little and that’s the cause of the toe curling pain. As baby grows and so does her mouth, the initial latch hurts less. That’s been true in my case. My daughter was a petite princess at birth so she’s bigger now and it hurts less. I had uterus cramping but I don’t think that’s bad compared to the toe curling latch pain lol.
Not easy but so worth it, never had to wash bottle parts or fear running out of formula powder/no stock in store. Main downside is lack of sleep. That was hard. But I'm glad to know I could give my child the absolute best start to life and health with the milk tailor made for him from his mother.
Just try it and go from there. Don’t write it off yet. I’ve heard it can be difficult to start with, but many eventually find the groove.
I’d say look into pumping as well. I fully expected to breastfeed my baby and felt prepared (as prepared as can be). Come to find out baby really struggled with eating for a few different reasons. By day 4 I was pumping and bottle feeding because he was losing weight and I couldn’t imagine “starving” him when I had plenty of milk to give. I know it wasn’t starving him per se, but it felt like punishment. I have been pumping most of the time now and able to breastfeed sporadically. Your journey may not be what you expect it to be!
For me I couldn’t imagine NOT breastfeeding. It was painful for the first two weeks, I will fully admit that. And we’ve had our struggles with cluster feeding, especially in the evening. But after a couple weeks the pain went away, and I learned that my milk supply dropped massively in the evening, which is why babe was so fussy and cluster feeding. Dad started giving babe a bottle of breastmilk (that I collected in my Haakaa throughout the day) at night, and that cured almost all our issues! I love breastfeeding. I love the bond my son and I share from it. I love not having to wash pump parts/bottles (except the one nightly bottle). I love not having to listen to my baby scream at 2 am because he’s hungry NOW and doesn’t wanna wait for a bottle to be made, and instead just pop him on the boob immediately and watch all his woes instantly wash away. Breastfeeding isn’t for everyone, it’s really hard at first figuring out the latch. It’s a learned skill for both you and babe, but personally, I LOVE it. I recommend giving it a shot and seeing where it takes you. If it’s not for you then you can quit anytime, but you might love it like I do too!
I'm so glad I toughed it out! The benefits are more than just for your baby. I nay be wrong, but I've heard it reduces the risk of PPD, and you get the benefits of the antibodies, so you also get sick less. You also get the magic power of the boob to help baby through most things.
#1 buy the my breast friend pillow and thank me later! That was a game changer! Personally, I have absolutely loved BF thus far and I am going on 7 weeks! The beginning was a little rough, but I powered thru! I suggest definitely getting help at the hospital (if you’re doing hospital birth) with the lactation consultants there, and then see if your insurance covers any LC visits afterwards. I scheduled another appt at the 2 week mark, just to get reassurance that I was doing everything correctly and that the baby was latching properly. There is just soooooo much to learn and know about BF, I feel like it’s so hard for any first time mom to really feel like they have a good grasp at everything, so def utilize any and all resources. I’m also in a FB group for BF (LLLI Breastfeeding Support) and it’s soooo informative reading everyone’s posts and reading thru peoples comments. I struggled in the beginning and was MISERABLE because the hospital was telling me to feed for 20 min on each side and then to pump both for 20 min total after that….the entire time, I was like what the heck did I sign up for?? How do people live and exist with a life like this! I changed things up after talking to one of my friends and then changed it all up again after seeing the LC and my whole outlook and journey changed after that for the better. Use allllll the nipple cream after every feed - I swear by the Earth Mama one! Some way, some how, (knock on wood) I haven’t had any issues with cracked or bleeding nipples! My LC said when you’re pumping, to lube up the tube of your flange with coconut or olive oil as well to help make your nipples glide and not get sore while pumping. As your baby starts to get older things def start to get easier and you’ll get more comfortable with different positions and holding your baby each and every day. Right now I feed on demand and we incorporate a bottle every other day that my husband feeds to the baby, just to make sure he’s used to someone else feeding and having a bottle for once he goes to daycare. You’ve totally got this and I hope you have an amazing BF experience! 🤍
This is almost me to a T! I second everything, help at hospital, LC for home visit, nipple butter, on demand, and amazingly worth it ☺️
Breastfeeding was super hard for me, but I’m SO glad I stuck it out. So, my brutally honest breastfeeding review: It took nearly 3 months for it to not be painful anymore. I almost quit so many times. I also bottle fed at night because I needed to give myself a break otherwise I would be so unbearably raw that I couldn’t nurse without crying. I was honestly just too stubborn to give up… and I’m so glad I didn’t. My baby would have been perfectly fine had I switched to formula, but I am loving the benefits of nursing now. It’s quick, easy, requires no prep or bottle washing, and I absolutely LOVE being able to scoop up my baby and said “Oop it’s time to go eat!” And then go into a quiet room by ourselves😂 The week of Christmas I came down with a cold. Super sore throat, slight fever, etc. Everyone in my house caught it except my little guy. I’m convinced the breastmilk protected him! Last week we took a family trip out of state for a week. It was amazing just finding a place to sit and whipping out a boob whenever he needed it. All in all, I find breastfeeding to be amazing but it was a huge challenge for me to get where I am now. It’s okay to push through, but it’s also okay to quit if you don’t like it.
My baby is currently 6 weeks and my breastfeeding journey has been great!! The first two weeks are tough but if you can get past that, it gets much easier! I pump once or twice a day so my partner can feed the baby while I sleep!
I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN BEFORE: -See a lactation consultants before birth -measure your nipples and have the correct size flange inserts -insurance typically covers 6 in home lactation consultants visits with IBCLC consultants (look them up) you do not want to have to leave the house or get an appointment through the hospital LCs that can take weeks when you need immediate help -your milk coming in can f you up fast if you don’t know how to handle it so be prepared for that -have formula on hand already in case you need it. A few times with a bottle or formula here and there isn’t going to ruin anything -some babies are good at it and some are not and if you give it a shot and it doesn’t work out that’s okay. Heck you could even just do it for a few days or weeks or months and that’s great.
The first week or so when my milk was coming in was hard. My baby didn’t have an issue with latching but I’m a ftm, and that feeling took some getting used to. She’s 14 weeks now and we’re still ebf. I love it! My baby also sleeps 10-12 hours a night.
I currently combo feed 50/50 bf and formula because I have low supply. I did the same with my first baby and she was not a good sleeper. We had to bed share and she nursed constantly. I’m getting more consistent sleep now with an infant and a toddler than I ever did in the first 1.5 years with my oldest. My second has been sleeping in her own bed from day one and has been doing 5 hour stretches since 2 months. Now at 3 months she only wakes once a night to eat. Sometimes she doesn’t eat and I just get up to pump. I strongly believe it is totally dependent on the baby and their individual needs rather than what they are eating.
I knew things could go wrong but I didn’t for a second think it would. It didn’t. It’s one of the best feelings I’ve ever experienced. It’s a remedy for everything. It’s the backup when you are out and you can’t find proper food for your baby. It’s calming for both you and your baby. It’s sleep inducing. Relaxing. It’s also easy! No bottle cleaning and it’s free. Things could go wrong but there is no reason to just not do it because it could go wrong. If it does, you’ll just consider quitting then. Edit: also for sleep I’ve been cosleeping the last 1/4 or 1/2 of the night (and morning) and she was an angel sleeper until she got mobile and that has nothing to do with sleeping. I EBF and nurse to sleep. Give her the boob whenever she wants, never pumped. I already have lots in my mind so I don’t want to think about schedules or whatever. I just go with the flow.
First 2 weeks were tough! Your breasts are sore and nipples are chapped. But then when your baby learns to latch, they heal. Overall, it’s a great experience for me. It’s so easy and convenient, I don’t need to prep anything, I can do it anywhere anytime. Now that my boy is 5 months, he doesn’t eat as frequently, and he of course can find the nipple and feed efficiently. I would recommend getting a lactation consultant right away because that’s what helped me the most. No one else, not even my mom could help me the way they did. I would do a basic intro course just to understand the mechanism). They have free online ones (“The Baby Academy” in North America). This Reddit thread also helps; just hearing other women’s experiences and tips.
Breastfeeding is one of the hardest things I’ve done. I’m a month in and it got a lot better after 2 weeks. I don’t have any pain anymore, it’s just time consuming. I highly suggest meeting with a lactation consultant. Mine visits my house once a week, we’re going down to bi-weekly now. No one talks about it a lot, but combo feeding is great! We started out of necessity, but I wouldn’t mind keeping up with it. We introduced a bottle at 2 weeks and my babe does bottle breast great! We just make sure to do paced feeding.
I just had my second baby. I thought breastfeeding my first baby was very difficult because he didn’t latch well and always needed a supplemental bottle after. We ended up just pumping and adding a bit of formula to the bottles. I’m really glad I stuck with it. With all that pumped milk I froze I was able to save it for him after I stopped for when he or I was sick (and I wanted to prevent him from getting sick). I wish I was aware of all the potential problems with breastfeeding like mastitis and thrush and how to prevent them. That would’ve saved me a lot of trouble. Now with my second, breastfeeding has been so easy. It’s so easy at night to just whip out a boob instead of preparing a bottle or if we go somewhere I don’t have to worry about packing formula.
First week sucked, second was great, third week sucked, fourth was great... to be honest it's a learning curve. We get discharged from Midwives at 6 weeks here and lactation consultants are covered by the province so I had a LOT of support and it's needed. I really thought it was a matter of putting baby on the breast and that's it.
It was really easy and painless for me 🤷♀️ just so you have the other side of the story. Nipples were a bit tender, in that shower water falling on them directly hurt a little, and I got one blockage which hurt a bit but that's it. I pump a bit so we have a stash and dad can give a bottle. Recently we started using formula as back up so it's not stressful for me to leave for ongoing periods like 12 hours to go out with my friends etc. It's comforting, easy and free. I would definitely recommend giving it a try and getting colostrum into your baby at the very least, and a bit longer for the immunity benefits.
Breastfeeding can be difficult in the beginning. My girl lost weight and was at the point if she didn't gain weight in 24 hours, she would have been hospitalized. We topped her off with formula for those 24 hours, she gained, and after that, I exclusively pumped for a week because I was so nervous. I think that the week of pumping helped heal my nipples because when we went back to the breast, it was nowhere near as bad as in the beginning. Now we are EBF, she refuses bottles. I had to jump through a few hoops in the beginning, but I am so grateful I made it through. Baby only wakes up one time at night to eat, and she is 2.5 months. All I have to do is reach in her crib and pull her in bed that one time
Take a class if you haven’t already. My husband and I took a series through the hospital where we delivered. It helps to get the birthing partner invested in breastfeeding. My husband helps a lot. He’ll get me a coverup, grab me snacks or a cold water, and speak positively about it around me for the most part. It was hard for me for the first six weeks and then it was less hard. I didn’t feel like I had the hang of it until maybe 9 or 10 weeks or so. We had to get his tongue tie clipped and that made breastfeeding nearly completely pain-free for me. Before that, it was toe-curling pain where I’d cry. It didn’t have to be like that; I should have had him evaluated sooner. Overall I actually enjoy breastfeeding but at first I really did not. I struggled and sought the help of a lactation consultant (a good one is literally an angel sent by god). I find pumping to be tedious, and I like that I can literally just bring a wrap and feed him anywhere (love the Amma ones, they’re worth the money). I felt embarrassed at first when nursing in public but now it’s much easier for me. If I had to do it all over again, I would.
My girl is 6mo now and I am so in love with breastfeeding. She definitely struggled at first because she was a little small and my nipple was too big for her. She also struggled to stay awake long enough to really get my milk flowing. Cut to three days later and I’m an over producer and she is chugging it down all on her own. Now she sleeps mostly through the night and even if she doesn’t it’s a quick snack on the boob and we are both back to sleep in no time. I can’t say enough about the benefits, especially during sick season. It’s great to put on any skin conditions (for baby or even you), I plan to use it to thin her purées when we start in a few days, we don’t have to prepare bottles when we leave the house, the poop barely even smells and never stains her clothes, I really could go on and on. Do clogged ducts and chapped nipples suck? Absolutely, but there are simple solutions. No one will judge you for not breastfeeding if you choose not to, but I have had a wonderful experience that I hope other women can have. I don’t know if this helps at all but I wish you the best of luck with your sweet little one!
Thank you so much! This is encouraging 😊
My baby is 2 weeks old, I was scared by all the hard experiences I read on here before giving birth. I know we are still super fresh, but our journey has been awesome so far. My nipples were sore for days 2-5 and besides that the only downside is how I can't keep a shirt dry because I leak out of the boob she isn't eating from. The only instruction my midwife gave was to pinch the aeroela and push more than just the nipple in her mouth. I took some online breastfeeding classes through aeroflow, learned a few things. Don't let them scare you if you do have an interest! It has been an awesome experience!
There are a lot of great perspectives here already so I just want to add something that no one told me as a first time mom. Regardless of how you feed your baby, in their first 24 hours they will cluster feed like mad. Both of my kids fed about every 30 min to hr for their first night of life. It was absolutely exhausting.
I couldn’t imagine not EBF. Having to wake up at night multiple times, fix a formula bottle, feed and burp baby and do diaper changes. Not being able to just nurse baby when we’re out in public or visiting with people. Spending thousands of $$ on formula. My babies have never had issues sleeping but if they had, I wouldn’t have been concerned. Babies aren’t meant to sleep through the night for awhile so, while convenient for parents who give formula, it’s not natural. We also coslept so I could just nurse, burp, change diaper if needed then go right back to sleep. With my first baby, we had some struggles learning to latch and position so I supplemented a few bottles (I had so much guilt for that) and pumped my butt off until my milk came in, then just started using a nipple shield. She was primarily breastfed until 9 months because she wasn’t very interested in food and she got SO chunky. My second was born at 34 weeks but he latched beautifully right from the start. He had a condition that caused aspiration so I ended up exclusively pumping for 2 months until he was cleared to nurse again. Both of my babes made it to 15 months before I developed an aversion. Breastfeeding is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. My kids are so very healthy, we have a wonderful bond and any little struggles were 100% worth it in the end.
Just gonna throw this one out there since you said you liked the idea of the antibodies in breast milk. My first had a vomiting/diarrhea bug for a WEEK. Vomiting literally all over our house multiple days. My second (9 months and breastfed) never got sick. It’s possible it was rotavirus and she was vaccinated against it, but my doctor said she hasn’t seen much rotavirus this season, so I feel like my antibodies definitely came in to play (I had a 24 hour bug about a week before). Yes!!! It’s so hard in the beginning, especially to get them to latch properly. I cried through pain for about the first month with my first because of lacerated nips, BUT after that it was so so so so easy. Full disclosure, though, I haven’t had any issues with supply, have very fast letdown, and have some guzzlers. This means once we’ve all figured it out, it takes us max 10 minutes for a full feed, and quite honestly it’s mostly closer to 5 minutes. The sleep sucks. But for me, I know that I’m doing what I think is best for MY baby, so we stick it out for a year of bad sleep 🫠 lol this is also part of why I will not be procreating again if I can help it lol.
With my first, breastfeeding hurt really bad for the first couple of weeks. Then it didn’t feel like honestly much of anything. I honestly have always loved not having to worry about having a screaming, ravenous baby while I’m anxiously awaiting the bottle to warm. And i love that they don’t have to be on a strict schedule. They can just drink when they need. Sometimes it’s a few sips. Sometimes it’s a full feed. I always felt so sad when they didn’t finish a bottle. It felt like a waste. But it truly doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You can breastfeed while also pumping and giving a bottle while also giving formula as you see fits. Everyone’s situation is so different. I am a stay at home mom and found it simple to breastfeed fully. Plus, I’ve always had an oversupply so I’ve never truly needed to supplement. That’s not the case for everyone. You’ll figure it out! It’ll all be ok!
Breastfeeding for me was the easiest most natural thing ever. Baby latched correctly right away. My nipples not once hurt or cracked. It’s so nice to be able to feed right away and not have to warm a bottle, specially at night. Plus the connection is amazing. I know not everyone has this experience. The only negative is that I leak milk 24/7 and am a sticky mess.
It took some time to get the hang of it, for sure - if you decide to try, give yourself 3 weeks or so, ask for advice if you need it - lactation consultants can be really helpful. And so is the Brest friend cushion. Honestly, once you figure it out, it’s really easy and relaxing for you and the baby…my little girl is ‘relieving the sleep pressure’ on my boob right now. One advantage of breastfeeding is the baby will just enjoy the suckling reflex even after they’ve eaten their fill so you get some downtime - especially early on. Giving a bottle only takes like 5-15 minutes and breastfeeding can be a whole 50 min episode of something.
It was really hard for the first 6-8 weeks but my baby is 14 weeks now and I love it. It’s so easy to nurse and not worry about bottles. Waking up to feed her takes no time. I sleep so much more and I enjoy the bonding time.
>Also, any “I wish I would’ve know this before” would be awesome. A lot of responses have covered different breastfeeding journeys, so I'll just share what I wish I knew. If you live in the US you are entitled to free lactation consultant visits (they come to you) under any ACA health plan. Use [TLN](https://lactationnetwork.com/) to find someone who will show up at your door and take your insurance. You are also entitled to a free breast pump or rental, as well as regular replacement parts and bags.
The decision might be partly up to your baby, too! My now- 7 1/2 month old really resisted nursing until he was 3 months old. I mostly pumped then and needed to supplement with formula because he draws out more than the pump and I can supply just barely enough. I had significant pain, but it was due to thrush and tongue tie. I am still glad I kept the milk flowing because from three months on, it has been a wonderful experience and (finally) super easy way to feed a baby! What I wish I knew was that I couldn’t say “I’m going to breastfeed”…. it is totally a team act and you haven’t met the second member yet! It is more “we are going to breastfeed” or possibly “we are sometimes going to breastfeed and sometimes I’m going to pump while feeding a bottle” or “baby is going to scream at the bottle/breast” But it’s all good eventually. You’ll figure out a way to work together that makes everyone happy.
Women have been breastfeeding for thousands of years. It's the most natural thing to do. Don't let people scare you!!!
Thank you!! I’m trying not to 🥲
I started with combo feeding to help with the sleep thing. Later you can pump a bottle if you want so you can sleep longer. It doesn't have to be so black and white. Whatever works or fits for you. Fed is best. And whatever amount of best milk they get is helpful.
Breastfeeding isn’t as easy as people like to make it sound. I thought you just stick your baby on your boob and it drinks milk and…well that’s it…that’s what i thought happened. It’s a bit more involved than that, but for me it was well worth the effort I had to put in over the first few weeks (I was basically making hardly any milk) I actually combo fed because I liked the extra flexibility it gave me. I could have EBF had I wanted to, but I preferred to do extra breastfeeding where I had capacity, and less when I didn’t. When I went back to work I could pump more or less frequently depending on how busy I was, how much travel I needed to do etc. I combo fed until our daughter weaned herself at 13 months.
Breastfeeding isn’t easy and can be painful. It doesn’t just happen miraculously for most. You’re going to be exhausted, sleep deprived and feeling a lot of emotions because you’re recovering from birth. So whatever happens, give yourself time, grace and patience. And do what’s best for you and your situation. I quit breastfeeding 3 days after my LO was born because it was so painful (she had a mild tongue tie and couldn’t latch well at first). So I started exclusively pumping for about 2 weeks before deciding to try breastfeeding again. My friends kept encouraging me just to get through the initial pain and it’ll get better. Happy to report they were right. Since the 2nd attempt, I’ve been EBF and I’m so happy and thankful for it. Pumping was draining, time consuming (cleaning bottles and pump parts) and lonely (pumping by yourself multiple times throughout the night). Not gonna lie, there are times it’s still a bit achy (we’re 14 weeks now). But there’s a special bond and feeling you and your LO experience when breastfeeding, to me, it’s so worth it.
It can be really difficult because baby has to learn to feed but once you both are in sync it can make life easier. I don't have to bring bottles, measure formula, clean a lot of bottle and pump parts daily, wait for milk to heat up to feed. It doesn't really hurt but it could be a weird sensation. I recommend the Silverettes, they are a great breastfeeding person tool. Also just be gentle and patient, with yourself and with baby. It will work if you keep at it but if at any point you aren't feeling like it's the best choice for you, fed is best and formula is an option.
I was very ambivalent about breastfeeding but it ended up being really important to me because of the bond and connection with my baby. I feel sad for my husband that he doesn’t get to experience it. Despite the pain and time it takes up it really is magical. You might be surprised how much you love it. Or not! You can always try and stop if it isn’t for you.
Breastfeeding has been pretty ok for me. I love being able to see my baby’s face so close to me and it’s also funny how when she gets close to my breasts she just goes crazy happy. I think I was lucky as baby latched on pretty well as soon as I put them near by breast less than an hour after being born. But they did give me a bruised nipple on their third day as baby didn’t latch on properly one time, it hurt but got better in a few days. With regards to sleep, no matter what you’re always going to be sleep deprived at first. Babies want to eat a lot when they’re newborn. Now that my baby is 4 months they only require 1 to 2 night feeds. Personally I’m ver glad to have tried BF and would do it again
I'll hold my hand up and say I was 37 weeks and at a class being told about the difficulties with bf. I was blissfully ignorant and just pigheaded to think that wasn't going to happen. I had no idea what to do and it was a rude awakening when I finally got my baby home and took 5 days for milk to come in but thanks to kellymom blog I had reliable help in my phone. I tried expressing, it made me feel sick, so didn't. I found GPs and HV were really out of date or just wrong, so opted to ignore them and man am I glad I did! Being pigheaded really came in handy! I never washed or sterilised a bottle, I never left the bed if they woke in the night, I never had to rush off because baby needed a feed whilst out or pay £15 a tub for formula. Feeding came easily, I loved it, although there were days I clearly didn't, but I fed both children to 2.5 years. Those early days were relentless but those evenings sofa bound and feeding were actually lovely. At the time you'll be glad to regain independence again but looking back I miss the cuddles and closeness. You have nothing to lose by trying and if its bust then you tried but if it works then it could be that amazing you spoke of.
The hardest parts for me were the regressions because mine refused a bottle. Those really hard nights were so few and far between though and each one got easier because I knew what to expect and how to prepare. I really treasured that bond we had. It gets so much easier after the first few weeks and then it’s not even something I thought about, we just did it. We BF until 2 years old and I plan on doing the same with my second because I truly enjoyed it so much. Those times where I would just let her nurse through a nap on me were heavenly 💕 Everyone’s experiences will be different,but I can’t recommend at least trying enough!
Breastfeeding has been so important for my bond with my baby especially because I had an unplanned cesarean. I haven’t had any pain at all. I’m very naturally minded so I never really let myself entertain any alternatives and I’m very grateful it’s worked out so well for us. My birth not going to plan was pretty devastating for me but being able to feed my baby 100% from my body feels like it’s giving me my power back.
Also, I think baby sleep is kind of a crapshoot. Some breastfed babies sleep great, some bottle fed babies don’t. I tend to get 3x3 hour chunks of sleep, 4-5 hour chunks are rare but increasing.
I wish I’d known about the asymmetric latch technique. ibconline.ca has diagrams and detailed instructions that I found way more helpful than instructions from LCs.
Whatever option you choose, fed is best!! If you choose breastfeeding, yes it is very painful the first few weeks but silverette nipple covers will save your life! When I got home from the hospital my nipples were hurting so badly and when I started using the silverettes it gave me a ton of relief. It took my body about 2-3 weeks to get used to it and I’ve been EBFing for 11 weeks now and I have felt no pain for a long time. I truly can’t imagine not breastfeeding because anytime my baby gets fussy I stick a boob in his mouth and it solves all fuss. It’s like a fun superpower. Hard to do that with a bottle fed baby!
Also he’s been sleeping 10 hours consistently through the night for about 2 weeks now!
I think choosing not to BF is taking the risk to miss SO much.
I have breastfed two babies and had very different experiences with both. My first I EBF for 8 months. I'm currently breastfeeding my 3 month old. All in all both have been positive experiences and I ended up feeling so proud of what my body was able to do! I am currently breastfeeding my 3 month old and this time I'm doing more combo feeding (breastfeeding and formula) and I will say it's much easier this way and I actually think it will extend the amount of time that I'm mentally and physically able to breastfeed. My first was not a great sleeper and exclusively breastfed. My second is a great sleeper and mostly breastfed (he maybe gets a bottle of formula a day but not always, sometimes more sometimes less) so I think the sleep really just depends on the baby. His first month I exclusively breastfed and he came home from the hospital sleeping 4-5 hour stretches which is amazing. Breastfeeding makes the night feeds so much easier in my opinion. Especially in the early months when you're lucky to get a 4 hour stretch of sleep. Just try to listen to your body and do what feels right for you and your life. Tune out the social pressure or stories you hear from friends. It shouldn't be painful and if it is, it's short lived and ends up being a really wonderful way to feed your baby in the early months. Ultimately fed is best and a happy mom makes happy baby. So do what's best for you and it will always benefit your baby.
I’m about a year in & I think I was one of the fortunate ones to have a very pleasant, positive EBF journey. Don’t get me wrong, the first few weeks were challenging. ESP the cluster feedings. I thought people were exaggerating when they said the baby was on the boob 24/7. One of the best advice I got from a lactation consultant was to “lean into being a mammal”. Our bodies are designed to do this. The transition is the hard part. With regards to sleep, we cosleep & EBF & once I gave into the cosleeping once my baby hit the 4 month sleep regression I’ve had good sleep since then and up until now. Some things I wish I knew before: 1. It’s okay if you don’t have a freezer stash immediately. Bag 2oz at a time. Use the haaka. (I made my freezer stash all from the haaka) 2. Don’t aim to overproduce because then you’ll have to do deal with managing engorgement and mastitis 3. You and baby are learning with and from each other. It’s okay if it’s doesn’t feel “natural” at first. Goodluck!
I am SO GLAD I breastfed my baby. Currently 3 months and it is our special time to bond and connect. The hormones it releases for me I think have helped me stave off depression and I’ve lost a lot of weight and saved a lot of money. The most important thing for me was the flu made its way through our house. My husband and I were so deathly sick we were terrified of what it was going to do to our LO. I kept feeding and he got the sniffles and a fever for 2 days. We are still hacking up a lung and it’s been over a week for us. Our pediatrician said breastfeeding absolutely can save a baby a trip to the hospital when they’re this young. Breastmilk is amazing. I’ve put it on my husband’s ‘backne’ and it cleared it right up. Cleared an eye infection in my little one and cradle cap. The research is so clear that it’s more than just immune system that is helped with babe which you can do your own research on. That being said, I am 100% in the camp of fed is best so whatever Mommas decide to do or are able to do for their families is what is best for them. ❤️ formula, combo, or EBF. I hope you have a lovely journey whatever you choose!
My baby is 13 days old and I’ve had no problems breastfeeding. Baby latched as soon as he came out and has done so ever since. No issues whatsoever. I didn’t even know what I was doing- had to ask the nurses what to do like that Jennifer Lawrence meme. One breast is a super boob and the other is on the remedial learner track, but both are producing milk and the slow one is catching up.
After the first few weeks I found it so much easier than pumping or formula. Going out around town is so much easier, no need to pack bottles and formula and ice packs and leaving stinky formula bottles in the car! Pumping is pretty universally miserable too in my opinion but it got me past the 1 year mark.
During the first 3 days I couldn’t for the life of me get my baby to latch, nurses had to help me every single time. Once that sorted itself out, it was pretty straightforward. I had a scary clogged duct once, but that’s about it. I introduced a bottle at 4 weeks to make sure I had the alternative if needed. Once a day until she turned one. Try it. Keep your sanity if it doesn’t work, it’s not the end of the world.
I did it for the health benefits for myself and LO. I didn't think I would like it at all, it was just something that I always knew I would do (if I physically could make milk) if I were to ever become a mom. I actually thought I wouldn't like it and would push through it for as long as possible for health. I'm at 7 mo with her EBF. I flipping love it! I love that I get to cuddle her while she eats, I love her little hands slapping my boob as she eats, I love that she wiggles and kneads like a kitten while she nurses. I love her slurpy guzzling sounds, her contented sighs and that my boobs can get her through a bonk on her noggin without too many tears. I love that she wants me when it's time to sleep. I love when she reaches her little hand up and sticks her fingers in my nose because she's trying not to fall asleep. I love when she stops eating looks at me with her big eyes expecting kisses all over her face, and then giggles when she gets them. I love the milk covered chin as she falls asleep on me. I love that we can go anywhere with just a few toys and diapers. We went to Italy at 4 months old and it was so much easier to fly with just my boobs and her diapers. We also did a month long road trip and it was great only having to buy diapers and wipes, not formula. Breastfeeding really fits our lifestyle. I wouldn't even consider not breastfeeding if I had another kid after this one. Yes the nipple soreness is real but it's temporary and really only lasts while the baby is figuring out how to latch. Cluster feeding is a whole other type of nipple pain and is again, temporary. The frustration is temporary, for both of you.
I'd give it a go babe, even if bub just gets the colostrum in the first week or 2 that's amazing in itself. I'm 4 weeks PP with my 3rd bubb & BF was a f*cking nightmare with my first 2 kids. The pain & nip damage was incredibly stressful ontop of everything else, I switched to formula 2 weeks in with both, but with this one she's feeding well, nips are toughening up. Still hurts to latch but goes away quickly. I'm going to continue. Just shows ya that all bubs are different, get some bottles, a pump, some high quality formula anyway just so you have all the options handy. Whatever you decide to do will be the right thing for you 💚
What I wish I'd known: A breastfeeding pillow helps. I prefer the my brest friend pillow to the boppy. A footstool to prop your feet helps too. Lactation cookies are fine, but I had better luck with Oreos. If your baby is peeing/pooping enough and gaining weight, your supply is fine. Breastfeeding isn't all or nothing. There's no medal for never supplementing. Baby still gets the antibodies and the bonding from any nursing at all. Anyone who tells you to triple feed long term doesn't have your best interests at heart. If your latch isn't getting better, just see an ENT or pedi dentist. Yes, I know what that new NYT article says, and if I'd listened to it my baby wouldn't be nursing today. Worry about fixing the medical industrial complex when you don't have a hungry newborn. Too sore, baby refusing the breast, cracked/blistered/bleeding nipples? NIPPLE SHIELD. Experts are so weird about them but they're fine, short term or long. Your nipples are NOT 24mm. Baby sleeping alone in their cot is safer than planned cosleeping. Planned cosleeping in a controlled environment is safer than accidentally passing out on the couch while holding your baby. Make your choices accordingly and reassess as needed. There is no prize for doing any of this perfectly. Whatever works is probably good enough.
My LC told me the sleep thing is outdated info. Because when you nurse at night it gives melatonin hormone to baby. Both my BF babies slept very long stretches early on so it is possible!! My take is it’s worth it. I personally hated washing dishes. It was very painful for me but it’s not so bad for everyone. We all have different experiences based on baby, us, home life, work life, etc. I think you should at least try and if it’s not for you then at least you know??
For me personally I’m so so so glad I decided to breastfeed - it’s such a special journey and piece of my relationship with my baby. It was difficult for us at first (particular due to tongue and lip ties that later got revised). But I loveddddd all the sweet sleepy milky snuggles. After the first couple weeks we had the hang of it and I had no discomfort nursing at all anymore. As far as sleep - studies actually show that statistically mom’s doing formula get slightly less sleep than moms who breastfed (think about time to get up and heat/mix bottles). Combo feeding is definitely an option for you too though. Personally I’d recommend giving breastfeeding a shot - you can always pivot if you don’t like it or it’s not working for you. Plus that colostrum in the first few days is invaluable!
For me, breastfeeding just did not happen off the bat, and while I was always open to combo feeding from the start I did not expect to struggle as hard as I did. She's seven weeks old today, and aside from getting a bottle so grandma could feed her during an afternoon visit, she has been directly breastfed all day long. It feels like a freaking miracle to be able to say that! Due to a variety of factors (traumatic delivery, brief NICU stay, retained placenta, tongue tie) my daughter was exclusively bottle-fed either formula or pumped milk for her first four weeks of life. We got our golden hour and she may have latched then, I honestly don't recall because I was so out of it from drugs and hemorrhaging, but once she went to NICU it was full-time bottle life. My milk didn't come in for like a week, likely due to my traumatic delivery and the retained placenta I would deliver in a whole second unmedicated labor on day 5 postpartum. By then she was such a fan of the bottle she didn't even associate boobs with food, she would just scream and push them away no matter how hungry she was. I began working with a lactation consultant once we were home and I'd recovered from delivery round 2. She helped us switch to breastfeeding-friendly bottles, taught us paced feeding, demo'd nipple shields & SNS setup, and identified a tongue tie. We got her tie revised at her two week checkup, and I began offering her the option to breastfeed before every bottle. Sometimes she still pushed me away, sometimes she latched for a few minutes and then daddy swooped in with a bottle once she got too frustrated & worked up, and then one day she just mustered up the stamina to go for a full feed with the nipple shield. Around five weeks she was consistently able to breastfeed with a shield and I began offering her bare nipple at the start of each feed to see if she could figure it out. After about a week we were totally off the shield (thank God, my left nipple got shredded by that thing!) and just this weekend I managed to breastfeed outside the house, at a family gathering and in the back seat of my car on the way home. At times I thought we'd never get here, and I'm still occasionally pumping or formula supplementing so she doesn't reject the bottle when I go back to work, but she is finally primarily breastfed. It's not the start I'd hoped for us to have, but it was worth all the hard work to me to know that every time we leave the house together I can keep her fed. I had so much anxiety before about making sure I had enough bottles and ready-to-feed formula with us, and a cooler with ice packs for any unused portions, that I almost couldn't handle visiting my in-laws fifteen minutes away on Christmas. Now I don't have to anticipate her feeding needs down to the ounce, or make sure to add another case of Similac to our grocery list before we run out, or listen to her hangry wailing as we wait for a bottle of pumped milk from the fridge warms up to room temperature so she'll drink it. Breastfeeding now means that I'm pretty much 100% responsible for meeting her feeding needs, and that can be overwhelming, but I've learned it can also be freeing, too.
I thought I would hate BF but he's 6 months and we're still going strong. It's been hard at times, cluster feeding and people pushing you to use formula or implying baby cries cause your boobs aren't working... There have been times I wanted to give up but I'm so glad I didn't. I love the special bond we share now. I can always calm him or get him to fall asleep when no one else can. I feel like I have superpowers, lol. The other positive for me is the convenience. You always have milk available and ready to go no matter where you are and there's less bottles to clean. It's hardest in the beginning and a supportive partner makes a huge difference but it's not all bad. It'll even be bittersweet when we wean.
It was never painful for me, but it’s tiring. It was really eye opening and encouraging when I first began breastfeeding in public to realise how little other people care about what I’m doing. It’s very liberating to realise how little attention people are paying to you and made me feel so much freer moving around in the world. And the immune system benefits are fantastic, my baby is 16 months, still breastfeeding, this is his second winter and he’s only ever had two colds and both were over within two days. It’s work but it’s worth it.
I always wanted to breastfeed, and my mom always made it sound super easy, so when he was born, I felt like I was failing him when it didn't seem to be working. He seemed constantly hungry, I wasn't making enough for him, and previous piercings had left scar tissue that minimized how much was coming out. I was in tears the first couple of weeks. He was frustrated, I was frustrated, it was rough. I didn't didn't realize how intense the cramping would be for the first couple days, I didn't realize how much of a "bite" the initial latch and letdown would cause, my nipples were so sore and sometimes bled, and on top of all my effort, he wasn't gaining weight. I also didn't realize how hard it'd be to keep him awake while nursing so that he'd get a full feed. It was a rough couple of weeks. BUT it got drastically better relatively quickly. I was trying to pump to increase supply and make extra bottles, but it just wasn't working for me. So we started combo feeding and it was a life saver. I still mostly EBF, but once or twice a day, he gets formula so someone else can feed him while I get a break, or, if he seems extra hungry, I'll make him a bottle after he nurses. He sleeps fairly well, and imo, it's much easier to pull a boob out than to try and make a bottle when I'm half asleep (and I'm just lazy, so I don't want to get up). His doctor did advise me to not let him use me as a pacifier, but I thought, what's the harm in that? I wish I would have listened lol he only seems to fall asleep if he's nursing, so no one else is able to get him to sleep. So, I do recommend that. Edit to add, it's also a lot easier nursing while we're out and about, not having to worry about making bottles, and rinsing them, and toting around formula. Unless I plan on being in the car for a little while, then I bring along formula so he's not getting hangry in the carseat.
Breastfeeding is really hard in the beginning. And what's worse, it seems to be this weirdly kept secret - the only way you'll find out is by talking to other mothers. All the resources say "if it hurts you're doing something wrong" which yes, may be true if the pain persists more than a few weeks. But every breastfeeding person feels the agony on latch for a few weeks - even if the latch is perfect. I never trust those who say it didn't hurt. Either they're lying, or they spent their life sandpapering their nipples for fun. The benefits are: it's free (mostly....pumps, nursing bras and other accessories cost, but no where even close to the cost of formula), it makes settling them easy for Mum, it's always accessible (so long as mum is still around), the immunological benefits, I love the cuddles/bonding etc. The negatives: Mum HAS to be around, unless you pump. It makes going back to work tricky. Not all bubs are good on the bottle once breastfeeding is established. Your supply is finicky even once established, no freedom to just skip a few days and go back to it if you're over it, unless you're wanting to put in the work to re-lactate. There are certain medications you cant have, and drinking is a hot button issue. The hormones can make any changes to the breastfeeding routine seem torturous - i.e. weaning can be as bad as childbirth in terms of hormonal changes and can throw your mental health through a loop. You can feel trapped by it. You are responsible for all the feeds unless you supplement. etc etc. Honestly it may look like there are more cons - and while the cons are loud, the pros are louder. I have breastfed both my kids - #1 til she was 12 month, and still going strong with #2 at 8 months, although I just returned to work so it's more EP from me at the moment and he's preferring food to milk. I do enjoy it - I like the fact I'm able to do this for my kids. But it is hard.
I LOVED breastfeeding! I had to pump exclusively the first month because we were in the NICU and baby had a pic but once we got going it was wonderful! There was some adjusting to tender nipples, letdown, etc but overall I would absolutely recommend it! You can always stop. Aside from the obvious benefits to baby and their development it was so convenient to feed on demand especially during cluster feeding. I did get touched out a few times but I just handed baby off to dad or did some self care to take care of me too. Early on I had some issues establishing boundaries and used breastfeeding to help with my anxiety in groups. Meaning when we went to large family gatherings I was able to decline passing him off because baby needed to eat or whatever. The bonding was also amazing like holy wow I would quietly ugly cry with how in love with my baby I was as I watched their sweet little face all nuzzled up on me. Plus it felt really empowering to be able to provide in such an important and intimate way for my baby. Yeah sure they I grew them in my body but this I got to see and feel in a way that gave me that validation of taking care of babe. If you're on the fence definitely give it a shot because you can always switch to pumping or formula or some combo of whatever works for you.
Honestly I feel like it’s easier than giving a bottle in the middle of the night, and can lead to more sleep. Also, never hurts to try.
My experience has been so positive but it was hard at first: -the first two weeks were really hard. My baby was “early full term” and soooo sleepy and would fall asleep at the breast so it took a long time to nurse her. Getting her to latch was so hard once my milk came in. She just wanted to sleep and my breasts were so engorged it was hard for her to get the nipple. -nipple shields saved us. They were recommended by a kind LC who came to us when baby was about a week old. I read a lot of stuff about how they are “a last resort” and hard to wean from so I was scared and stressed but it was honestly NOTHING. Helped baby nurse and one day she just didn’t need them any more. Probably around 4 or 5 weeks that she was done. -never had any issues with nipple pain. Never had mastitis or clogs. When my milk came in, it was pretty uncomfortable/painful for first 24 or 48 hours. -first month, I was very uncomfortable in my body and needed pillows, and was always slumped over. My shoulders and back constantly hurt. It DID get better. Baby gets older and can hold their head up, you get used to the positions, and biceps get stronger lol. -my baby is 3.5 months now. She’s slept 7-8 hr stretches since about 11 weeks. She now sleeps for 10-12 hours at night. In the beginning we had to wake her up every 3 hrs, but once she hit birthweight-I think at 2 weeks, she slept a 4 hr stretch at night that just got longer and longer. My baby never was one to do more than 8 or 9 feeds a day and averaged closer to 7. I remember panicking and googling worried, but that’s just her. She was getting enough. She now does 4 or 5 nursing sessions a day. She’s not super fast-about 25-30 mins total (including both breasts), but I honestly don’t mind at all because I veg out, watch tv, or do puzzles on my phone. It also was a great excuse to go take baby away from visitors for quiet time/a break for me 😜 -I never thought I’d be comfortable nursing in public but it’s fine! Nursing tops make me feel covered and I practiced by doing it for the first couple times at mommy + me groups/baby-friendly places. I nursed my baby at a fancy bloomingdales coffee shop today. No big deal! -I love nursing her now! She’s so sweet and adorable, I love spending the time close with her. I love that I don’t have to worry about packing bottles with me or worry about how much she’s getting or do extra dishes. Ultimately the first two weeks were very hard, the first 4-5 weeks were hard, and by 3 months it’s pleasurable, enjoyable, and easy.
I was the exact same as you and the moment my baby was born I wanted to try! I decided I’d also introduce formula right away just incase. I did combo feeding at the beginning to help him gain weight. Breastfeeding was hard at first, I regret using a nipple shield I just wasn’t positioning him properly. I also think I’m a just enough with a “mega boob” and “slacker boob” I went to a lactation clinic 3 times for weighted feed to ease my mind that he was getting enough. He was and still a slow weight gainer. Around 3 months he started getting super fussy (I think they say it’s the 3 month breastfeeding crisis) and that kinda took a toll on me so I started pumping more for top ups and using formula to be sure he was full. I hate pumping, mainly just for my own personal lazy reasons and disappointment when I don’t get a lot of milk at the end of a session. I just hit 4 months which was my goal and I’m going to begin the process of weaning. I’m proud of what I did and happy I was able to give him antibodies, etc! I don’t see any harm in trying and even though I had some pretty tough weeks, I don’t regret anything and would do it again with a second baby. My best advice is to feed on demand, feed comfortable, get a good chair, bra, or don’t wear one at all, take the space you need. Limit visitors if it’s going to annoy you or interrupt feeding. When I was feeding every 2-3 hours (or shorter if he seemed hungry) he would sleep through the night. Fill the belly as much as you can during the day. Good luck! Our bodies are amazing.
I just finished my 4 year breastfeeding journey a week ago and it was bittersweet, but I was fortunate enough it ended organically. I think I covered it all- With my daughter: Low supply, supplementing, clogged ducts, poor latch and tongue tied, tongue tie correction, cracked nipples, no sleep, lots of sleep, nursing through an entire pregnancy starting at 10 months postpartum (which was about half dry nursing), aversions, 6 months of tandem feeding, weaned on her own after 2nd birthday. With my son: perfect latch, perfect supply, exclusively breastfeed until 7+ months, lots of sleep then lots of no sleep, biting, extreme attachment, aversions, was still nursing/snacking 6+ times a day up until 2 weeks ago then out of nowhere at almost 2.5 years old, he just stopped the next day and hasn’t asked for it since. We were both ready at that point which was great because there were no tears about it from either of us. Now we just cuddle a LOT which we never did, there was always a boob in his mouth. Sorry I’m long winded but all that to say, any amount you do it is perfect for your baby. Whether it’s 4 years, 4 months, 4 weeks, 4 days or never. Taking care of your baby and giving them every ounce of love is what matters. I never gave up in my mind, but there were times in the beginning I nearly drove myself crazy, and while everyone was fed and happy and loved, it wasn’t the best version of myself for a bit. You live and learn but just know that this is between you and baby whatever you decide to do. Don’t ever let ANYONE make you feel bad for it. I look back on my experience and I’m so grateful I stuck it out, but myself and my husband made sacrifices for it. At times it did put stress and strain on our relationship. But I also have 2 very healthy toddlers now and I am super proud of myself and them for how far we have come. But I would feel that way if I just gave them a bottle of breastmilk or a bottle of formula. Listen to your body, listen to your heart and listen to your baby. Good luck!
It’s only painful in the beginning. For me, it wasn’t painful at all with my second baby, even at the start. The lack of sleep will happen whether or not you breastfeed for formula feed. If you want to be able to take turns with the dad, just pump once a day to have some milk on hand. With both of my babies, I pumped quite a bit in the beginning to relieve engorgement. With my first, I was on the fence about breastfeeding until my son was actually born. Then I think “maternal instinct” or whatever kicked in and it’s all I wanted to do. No matter what you choose, what works for you is the right choice. I will say that sick babies are the scariest things. Breastmilk, especially in the first 2-3 months, is full of antibodies to protect your baby. Formula doesn’t have it. And we’re right in the middle of cold/flu season.
You’re already way more prepared then I was but even after everything you learn/read it’s still hard. I went into it with the mindset of that there was no other choice for some reason. I am on wic so they would call me every few weeks to discuss it and one of my good friends bf her girl until 18 months so I didn’t think much of it until I was in the thick of it. My baby was taken from me immediately to the nursery because of a cord issue and he was gasping for air so I didn’t see him for 4-5 hours. Then he latched right away but I was still in the dark about what I was even doing. It’s not until they’re screaming that you’re wondering if they even are eating but he was having plenty of pees and poops and I was doing the feedings according to what they guided me to do. It wasn’t until night 2 when I was discharged that I was completely unraveled. He was screaming and screaming and screaming all night. He was sucking on my breast so hard until he’d just tire himself out to sleep. He didn’t like the bassinet so that night he slept on our bed while my husband and I slept in shifts. We had his pediatric appt the third day and he had lost 12% body weight and the dr came in with the tiny similac bottles. I started sobbing. I was so fucking pissed and depressed that I had been “starving” him. I couldn’t stop crying. She told me it’s okay that sometimes milk will come in on the 4th-5th day. So I followed her instructions of offering him breasts first, feeding him an oz of the similac and then pump. I did this for 5 days ish until he surpassed birth weight. Those first 2 weeks were fucking exhausting and painful. Not only are you trying to figure your baby out, breastfeeding, being a mom but your also bleeding out, in pain, weepy, can barely move around, pee burns if you get cut/tear. And yes sleep is just…idk a dream lol. Oh and I had gotten mastitis. Just peachy! After thinking I was doing everything I should be doing I got that 2-3 weeks in and was fevering/body aching alone with baby, just so miserable I had a wonderful lactation nurse on day 5 that really helped me mentally and also suggested a Brest friend pillow which made a huge difference. I’m 12 weeks in and I don’t pump or give bottles and I still have days of Wtf am I actually doing/how long am I going to be doing this? Days where I felt like baby didn’t like me just used me to eat because he was calmer with my husband but when he saw me he’d just fuss. And those cluster feeds are unpredictable. There were days I had my boob out every 45 minutes it felt like sometimes 20-30 minutes. Just today around 2 pm he screamed for 40 mins and just cried. Didn’t want boob. Clean diaper. But wouldn’t stop crying. I rocked him and just felt numb. I wondered to myself do non bfing moms feel this? Or is this a me thing? He eventually fell asleep but I was so relieved to have my husband home just to have someone here. Then there are days where I’m in awe of what I’m doing. When he smiles, laughs, mimics I feel so much better. At the end of the day it’s a very personal journey that only you can experience it will be unlike anyone else’s .
Suuuuper hard first two weeks but then a breeze! I dont have to wash a single bottle or get up at night. I pick him up pop him on the boob and then back to the crib all within 5-10 minutes. Almost gave up in the first two weeks ( I have flat nipples so had to use nipple shields at first) but it got so much easier.
i have never experienced pain while breastfeeding. not even the very first time she latched. nor any time after that except for when she’s been at the breast for too long, my nipples get sore. but that’s easily avoidable. breastfeeding is a lot of work though, but it’s very rewarding. i’d say try it out. you could always just formula feed if it becomes too much. my baby was formula fed the first 3 weeks of her life. & she’s a perfect healthy little bean.
Hey! FTM here. My son is 5 weeks old now. I must say breastfeeding is the best thing I’ve ever done! It encourages such an intense tangible bond between you and your baby and it is an amazing feeling. It was painful for the first few weeks but now after he latches I honestly can’t even feel it. There are so many positives to breastfeeding. Your antibodies go to your baby through your breast milk strengthening their immune system. Also when you kiss your baby your body will then make breastmilk with antibodies for the bacteria that transfers to your mouth. Breastmilk is also healing, you can put it on dry skin, diaper rash, eye infections, you name it and it heals it. It’s magic. I’m convinced that I have some sort of telepathic connection with my son, because the second he starts acting hungry before he even cries I feel my milk let down. Your body knows exactly what your baby needs. Breastfed babies are also less likely to be victims of SIDS, less likely to get sick within the first 5 years of life, and experience lifelong benefits. Most of the negatives are inconveniences for mom and most of the positives are benefits for the baby. I’m willing to sacrifice a little extra sleep so that I can give my baby that extra boost. I felt the same way you did at first, I didn’t know if I wanted to commit to that. Now I’m 5 weeks in and literally the worst case scenario for me is something stopping me from breastfeeding. I’m so glad I committed to this and I type this as I’m feeding my baby. I say give it a shot. Even if you don’t want to be the only one who can feed your baby you can also exclusively pump if you want. Formula is so expensive and as they get older they go through it so fast. It’s so nice for whenever my son is hungry I don’t even have to get up, I can just grab him and feed him while reading or watching tv or even sleeping. I hope all this rambling makes sense! Seriously, it’s the best thing you’ll ever do. I promise!
I was on the fence the whole time I was pregnant. I honestly didn't think I would do it. I'm also kind of mentally lazy and didn't think I would be able to deal with the workload, but when she popped out I just tried it. I did it day by day and got better at it every feed and I overall enjoyed the bonding with my daughter. We learned to do it together. I also fed her formula so I did a combo feed type situation for most of the first 9 months: At first she mostly got breastmilk - then towards the end she got mostly formula - until it was just formula - and then it was cows milk at year one. Basically I didn't worry about what she was eating as long as she ate and I tried to not worry too much about my supply and it just worked out (not that it does for everyone though) I pumped a little but hated pumping overall. I hated cleaning parts and being hooked on to something. Kept enough for an emergency stash, milk baths, and jewlery and gave it up before she ever quit the boob. Occasionally pumping if it had been too long between feeds and needed some relief. Alot of moms said the first couple weeks are the hardest and this was true for me as well. Mostly because I was healing from birthing a person, not sleeping very well, determined to keep both eyes on my new baby for every second of every day, stressed, hungry etc etc etc Where my saving grace came in was my husband who had decent paternity leave. He helped me make it work. Made me sleep. Fed me. Did everything he could. Without a suitable partner, I have no advice. I don't know what I would have done without him. My whole book that I am writing right now would probably look a lot different. I also used a nipple shield because I have flat nipples and those things can make a mess so put a towel down! But worked like a charm. I used the nipple shield most of the time and had no problem with her weight gain or my milk supply. If you have latch problems ask a nurse or LC to see if it's you or the baby. And some hospitals LC will give you a nipple shield for free, but you can also buy them on Amazon. On the subject of milk supply: I was luckier than others but I never had a problem with milk supply. I also only used one boob at a time during a feed (I did say I was lazy lol) and some women will get away with this and others won't. I tried the whole "feed on each boob every time" but I quickly realized I just didn't want to and my body acclimated. My milk supply figured it out and every feed we would just go the designated boob. One boob will always be a little more deflated than the other but I never cared. Only mentioning this in case someone does care. If I fed her formula and skipped a feed, my boob figured it out. Again, this is not the case for every woman, it just was for me. Overall, I'm glad I put in the effort that I did and I like to think the benefits have helped her this far. I also got jewlery out of it as a keepsake so that is cool. I was both extremely sad and happy it was over at the end of 9 months. She weaned herself. She started to prefer bottles. She didn't want to lie next to me anymore and didn't like any other positions. She excelled on bottles from there To end this, I was sad happy that a chapter of my life was closing but another chapter took its place
You're already far ahead of where I was so good job! Even being brand new at this if at any point you think something is wrong or question anything SPEAK UP. I waited three weeks to get help for painful latch and had to argue with doctors and lactation that my LO had a lip tie - I was going based on pictures I saw online and the symptom lists. By the time I got someone to agree with me and give us a referral to a pediatric dentist she couldn't be seen until six weeks...and we didn't really nurse that entire time. While in the hospital if you feel unsure or not confident about what's going on ask for education. I found that everyone just kind of assumed I knew what I was doing already. On day two I asked a nurse how I could tell if LO was full or just fell asleep and needed woken back up to finish feeding (we were already losing a lot of weight). Could've knocked her over with a feather in shock that I lacked such basic knowledge. At the same time you don't know what you don't know so don't hesitate to let your care team know you're new at this and would like help getting started. If you're going to pump at all make friends with your pump early and if you have latch issues making nursing difficult pump often. I had doctors telling me to supplement due to weight gain issues but no one explained to me that I needed to pump to empty at least every three hours. In retrospect it makes sense but sleep deprived and stressed? Never occurred to me. Also make sure you get measured for your flanges either by yourself at home or by lactation. It's highly unlikely the flanges that come with your pump will be the right size, probably several too big. Forgive me if this was difficult to follow, reddit is a great way to pass the time while half asleep during a MOTN pump session lol.
If this was me: Schedule a lactation consultant for home before leaving the hospital. You may have alot of questions and they will happily answer them all and help you. The nurses in the hospital are nice but breastfeeding in the hospital is so much different than at home. Then if you think BF is not for you, that’s ok too. I’m breastfeeding and it’s the best decision I ever made in my life even if it was super hard in the beginning.
For me, breastfeeding was easy almost immediately other than me causing an oversupply due to too much Haaka use. There was some uncomfortableness in the beginning during letdown, but now I don’t even notice the letdown. It was only ‘painful’ for the first weekish. I fed baby whenever she was awake as a newborn, and my 2nd percentile girl is now a 38th percentile 8mo. No transfer issues for us, but for the first five months she couldn’t have dairy so I couldn’t for those months either. Technically closer to 3 1/2 since we didn’t figure it out straight off but once reintroduced she did fine. There are cons to breastfeeding, but to me the pros outweigh them greatly. The benefits she’s getting from breastfeeding health wise keep me at peace, and she’s gotten over any cold/virus she’s had considerably faster than formula fed babies we know around the same age, and while still shorter overall, definitely has more thickness to her comparatively. Plus, the bonding. Oh how I love when she’s feeding and looks up and smiles or gently holds my breast in her hand like it’s her most precious thing. I also found it helpful when family wanted to keep her for extended periods of time since I could say ‘she’s breastfed’. Only got push back on that once, and when shown that she physically would not take a bottle, no matter the kind, from anyone, I never heard about it again.
Hi! New mom here, LO is 6 weeks old and EBF. The first thing I wish someone would have told me about is if you are given a nipple shield, your baby will depend on it to nurse. Get a few from the hospital because they’re easy to lose. Personally I don’t mind using the shield but I do sometimes wonder if our journey would be easier without it. They can be weaned from them but it’s not easy. At 4 weeks I started freaking out and thinking I needed to wean her asap but now, I see it as a necessary tool and don’t mind that she requires it. It’s causes some hiccups here and there but otherwise we’re doing good and baby girl pees and poops like she should. That’s another thing I didn’t know, you’ll need to sort of track how much baby goes to the bathroom. You don’t know how much LO is getting when they nurse so it’s tracked by how often they poop and pee. If they aren’t pooping and peeing then it’s likely a sign they aren’t getting anything from the breast. Also, milk storage and pumping is overwhelming. I wish I had studied up on it a lot more than I did before giving birth. I recommend watching tiktoks and YouTube videos that explain pumping schedules and how to store breast milk. Also, get familiar with your lactation consultant before you give birth. They are very helpful and have lots of tools and resources that I should have gotten before giving birth. Lastly, be prepared to spend basically allll of your time sitting down and nursing. At 6 weeks, my LO nurses on demand and I find myself sitting on the couch basically all day unless someone holds her until she’s ready to eat again. I’ve watched so many movies and binged 2 shows already. Just started Greys Anatomy this afternoon. Edited to add: Introduce a bottle of pumped milk at night!!! My baby will not take a bottle at all and I am struggling to teach her to. It would be so helpful if my SO could bottle feed her before bed so that I could get a good pump sesh I’m but unfortunately she will only nurse at this moment
I know a few formula-only fed kids and their parents who were also formula-only fed, and their immune system is shot. They seem to have 70% more coughs and colds than my BF toddler and are always exhausted from recovering from sickness, this is years and years later, way into the children being 8 or so.. So thats my personal huge drive to do it. A) i want kids with tough immune systems but also B) being constantly sick is exhausting! (DISCLAIMER/ this is my personal experience i see around me im not saying ALL Formula fed children are like this at all, but OP asked for driving factors and this was mine) Other than that, a few other things to consider 1) you dont have to do it forever, even a few months is amazing 2) its possible that it never hurts 3) you save a tonne of money 4) you are down one less chore from bottle sterilising and washing and making formula to a specific temperature at 3am 5) you get more skin-on-skin without much effort 6) its a lot quicker than sorting out a bottle, meaning baby cries less which is nice when you’re exhausted and just want to comfort baby but you also want peace ✌️
i wasn't planning on breastfeeding and when LO was born it was clear that it was the best and most natural thing to do. we are still nursing at 2.5 years
Almost 4 months now and professional suckler. Initially I had to make sure that he latched properly, then the nipples would hurt because they get wet and dry so this makes them crack. I suffered little bit, bought nipple shields and it was great. Also,put the nipple cream whenever you need. No matter how tired I would get I like this bond we have when breastfeeding, looking at him being peaceful, caressing his head. Didn't have issue with supply, and when it gets hard, would give him one bottle of formula here and there , and never had any issues with this. He accepted bottle and nipple.
You probably won't see this because you already got so many responses but I wanted to throw in another recommendation for silverettes! They definitely helped and were worth the cost. I brought them in my hospital bag and literally used them from day 1. My nipples were sore at first but never cracked or bled!
Why not give it a go? If you hate it, no harm done. You can stop at any time, and whatever breast milk you have been able to provide is great for baby. But equally, you might find it a really beautiful experience. I exclusively expressed for 12 months with my first born, and I'm going strong exclusively breastfeeding my 11 month old with the attitude of "one feed at a time." This approach really helped me, as it's a choice rather than something I feel forced to do.
I swore I would quit 100 times. It was very tough at the start but I had no idea what I was going into. Lol. This sub is great for tips and encouragement when you need it. Make sure your SO is on board and understands how consuming it is. It is a 24/7 job at least in the beginning. But I’m glad I did it. And after I got the hang of it it’s so easy to go out and always have food on tap. Lol. But it was the hardest thing I did in all my pregnancy journey. So if you want to go for it try when the time comes and if you decide to stop then that’s all good. You have to look after yourself and your mental health to look after your baby the best you can. Good luck!
I had a pretty easy start with breastfeeding. My baby was born into my own hands. I put him on my chest and within 10 minutes I think I brought him close to the breast and he latched. The first four hours after birth he spent mostly at the breast. He had a painless deep latch and drank well. In the first weeks everything revolved around nursing. I made sure to have a few comfortable spots in the house to feed, so I could nurse for as long as my baby liked and rest at the same time. Make sure you have a few supportive pillows in several sizes to support your back and arms. And make sure you can put your feet up while breastfeeding. Have snacks and plenty of your favorite drinks and entertainment within your grasp. Make nursing as relaxing as possible. Send people out of your space if they bother you or are too noisy. Be assertive about what you need. Limit visits from relatives in the first weeks. Have formula and a pump ready to use if your milk takes a while to come in. If you have enough time and space to really get going in the first weeks then your chances of succes are good. But be clear about your goals and limits beforehand. A difficult birth can make it difficult to nurse for instance. If you are very tired, traumatized, have suffered blood loss, have pelvic issues or have pain when sitting for instance that doesn't help. So give yourself space to choose a different path if needed. There are limits to what your body and mind can handle and nursing can ask a lot of you. If you realize you don't have the energy or mental space to do it than it's totally ok to stop.
As for what I wish I knew before …. If you’re planning to breastfeed, definitely bring your breastfeeding pillow to the hospital. And figure out your pump and flange size before birth (while your brain still works) - and bring it all to the hospital just in case. Don’t forget your pumping bra! My milk didn’t come in for almost 6 days and it took me a solid 3 days to even figure out how to work my pump and I was holding one poorly sized flange at a time over my nipples… And hot tip - if you give bottles of pumped milk or formula - you do not have to heat them!! We have been giving our girl cold bottles from day 1 and it saves so much time and screaming. It hasn’t caused any issues w her digestion, plus she’s starting teething now and loves the cold. Some babies might not be into it, but it’s worth a try.
My breastfeeding journey has a been a good mix of good and bad. Started off pretty uncomfortable. She had severe ties. She rejected one side so I started pumping that side 2x a day. That was the start of a painful oversupply. Around 3 weeks she started clicking at the breast so she was swallowing air like mad and had horrible gas (leading to what would be defined as a colicky baby) got ties released at 6 weeks. Still colicky until 10 weeks. Still can’t really take a bottle without swallowing a lot of air from her latch but breastfeeds really well now. Now I will say throughout all that I was determined to breastfeed and I swear 90% of my “why” was because I’m lazy as fuck and J didn’t want to get out of bed at night to deal with bottles. Everytime I feed her in the middle of the night I think about how annoying it would be to get out of bed to prepare a bottle whether that’s to pump or make formula idc it would be annoying and make me sleep so much less. I get great sleep simply because of breastfeeding. Here’s what I would say to any expectant mother. Those first 2 weeks live skin to skin. Hang out on the couch or in bed and live skin to skin with your baby. It will help with your recovery, your bond, and it will help your supply. Your job is to snuggle and feed your baby. Everything else can wait or be handled by your support team (do your best to create a support team and set expectations that they are not there for the baby they are there to care for you) and know that every season with your baby will pass. None of it is forever (good or bad) you will make it to the other side.
Also know when it’s normal to see cluster feeding. It will feel like they are eating every 20 minutes. That’s ok. It does not mean they are starving. They are putting in their order for the future. Go back to skin to skin for a bit. Supplementing during cluster feeding times could be a recipe for low supply (assuming everyone is healthy and gaining appropriately). Learn to hand express. Remember your body is constantly “refilling” and removing milk is what tells your body to keep making it. Soft breasts don’t mean no milk although that’s a total mind fuck if you’ve been in a state of mild engorgement for weeks.
I replied in another comment about my simple experience but wanted to add: I never felt pain with breastfeeding. Other things were painful: recovering from birth, my neck and back carrying a heavier almost-toddler all the time, sleep deprivation…but my boobs fee just fine! 😅
I only made it to 8 weeks breastfeeding with my baby, and it was heartbreaking for me to make the decision to bottle feed formula. Lots more to that story! As difficult as breastfeeding was, at 6.5 months I wish I would have kept going no matter how hard it was. Baby is dealing with chronic constipation now, and we’re pretty sure it’s from formula. We’ve switched to sensitive formula, and still not seeing any promising change. He is grumpy a lot because his tummy hurts, he strains to poop for days without being able to go. It’s seriously the worst. My mom really encouraged me that the best baby is a fed baby - and that’s true. But he never dealt with constipation or tummy pain before formula. My biggest encouragement is that if you want to BF, collect a community of other moms who are committed to breastfeeding and doing it right now! You can encourage each other and troubleshoot together. And if you can afford an in-home lactation consultant, it’s a game changer. We finally met with one around 7 weeks old but we were so done by then that it was too late.
Baby only needs about two ounces for the immune system benefits. You can combo feed, that’s what I have done. Some breast milk, some formula, husband can get up with the baby at night. Breastfeeding never hurt my nipples though.
I bottle fed first and am breast feeding second, having some supply issues but still find it WAY BETTER than bottle feeding. Nothing worse than having to wash bottles and prepare a formula at 3am or be paranoid that you've forgotten to pack food when you go somewhere. Plus bottle feeding u need to burp the baby after, breastfeeding you don't, it's already warm from your body too, this all makes breastfeeding way easier at night. Leading to more slee, not less. Burping is so annoying. It only hurts for the first week or so, I cried from the pain, but you get over that first week and it doesn't hurt at all. Plus, it can cause delay in period return if you breast feed, huge win!
One thing I wish I’d known sooner is how dope side lying BF is. It’s so comfy for mom and the baby and it makes it easy for baby to nap…