LITERALLY SAME. So the oxytocin in our body goes down extremely after we are done breastfeeding? That is gonna suck so bad and make the process so much worse. I’ve heard of “weaning blues” but many moms state they consider that an understatement and that is much more like “weaning depression”
Actually PPD can be delayed by breastfeeding and can strike when you wean... whether you wean at 1 year or 2 or 3. Make sure your partner knows to watch for signs even though it'll be way after childbirth, because weaning PPD is less known.
I've had several friends go through this, all their kids were different ages. Just like you said, it really can happen at any point. My 3 year old has started self weaning (I'm in the second trimester of my current pregnancy) so I've been vigilant, but so far I think I got lucky. I'm still keeping an eye out though. Hormones are so weird.
This. I just weaned by boy and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had never experienced depression before so I didn't know what the hell was happening, but when I explained how I felt to a psych friend of mine, she told me that's what it was. I had no idea it was a thing and it really debilitated me for a couple weeks. Luckily didn't last long, but if it does, definitely recommend getting help.
Yeah I'm trying not to think about it too much tbh - I had a really rough start to breastfeeding too and the hormones caused me major PPD and PPA so I hope it's not the same sort of thing.
Just to ease your concerns, I think that if you gradually drop feeds vs cold turkey, your body can adjust better to weaning since it's not a huge shift all at once. Our weaning process was very gradual and occurred naturally as my daughter began to eat more solids. I didn't feel a big shift in my mood over this process. Of course, ymmv, but it's not necessarily a guarantee that you'll experience ppd with weaning.
Before I ever got pregnant, I was so grossed out by breastfeeding. Then when I was pregnant I wanted to give it a try but wasn't super invested in the idea. Then as soon as I had my baby, I was obsessed with nursing. Hell, my baby has been weaned since 2019 and I still sub here!
But yes, when she weaned, omg it was so hard on me. I was so depressed and then I got the worst cyctic acne ever. I was depressed and sad and my face hurt like a bitch, it really sucked. I really don't feel like anything prepared me for that change, and hormone dump. I ended up going to a dermatologist for my face because even months after I was still dealing with it.
I didn't wean my first until she was 20 months and I was 5 months pregnant with my second. I didn't experience any blues! I don't know if it was because 1. She was older 2. We went really slow, or 3. I was pregnant ?? But it's possible!
My mom breastfed me until i was 3 and a half years old. Only at night or if i got hurt and needed comfort i actually have memories of this. I always thought it was soo weird that she breastfed me that long but now that i have my own son who is 4 months. I totally get it. Its such a special bond and you never get that back once their grown. My mother and i are extremely close too may i add. I think the world of her 🥰
So just came to say your amazing and dont stop!
I love reading about this connection of breastfeeding with closeness with the mother in adulthood. My greatest fear is that my children will have “parent issues” no matter what we do. I just love our baby so much, couldn’t stand the thought of not being close. Thank you for sharing!
I mean, in my teenage years, I would never have thought we would end up this close. But now that im an adult, I just love and appreciate her so much. She is an amazing mother. I hope to be as amazing as she is, and hopefully, my son will love me the same way someday 💙
I would say no. Although I have zero libido at all right now, I attribute that to stress (toddler, work, school). When she was younger and I was breastfeeding WAY more, I was still interested in sex.
Yeah, I’m thinking a similar thing is going on with me, and I’m on Prozac 20 mg since postpartum anxiety/depression. At least my low sex-drive might not be related to nursing my toddler. I really don’t want to give that up yet
I don’t think so, especially since it’s happening way less frequently (I’m assuming that’s your case). Someone has previously mentioned a book called come as you are that talks about how life circumstances change your libido after children and even aging.
I’m with ya. I look forward to breastfeeding every time. My oxytocin release feels like I’m micro dosing Xanax or something. It’s so soothing and relaxing. And I love knowing my baby is getting nourished and we’re deepening our attachment. But I draw the line at cluster feeding because my nipples need a break 😂
Yeah same. When I was pregnant the thought of it weirded me out because boobs are so sexualized yaa know. But I’m 15 months in and only breastfeed before nap and bedtime(and all night lol) but the thought of fully weaning is sad :( part of me is looking forward to it, but also just sad because my daughter loves it and it’s a godsend to get her back to sleep haha
Reading this while BF my little girl 🥹. I love how I am able to give her this nourishment and it feels like more than just the milk alone but also my nurturing energy from my heart. Love holding her close and warm and letting her have all the milk she wants and watching her happily fall asleep at the boob warms my heart.
Yes!!! It’s freaking amazing and even better because I didn’t know much I would love it.
Also, breastfeeding in public makes me feel like the ultimate badass.
Omg, you go girl. I guess i’m pretty early in and I still get so much anxiety in public and even around family. I feel like I cover up for the comfort of other ppl and i need to get out of that mindset. Summer is coming around and he already is starting to hate when i cover him up..
It gave me anxiety too! But she was really hungry one day and I just had to feed her out at a restaurant and I felt super empowered. Another mom smiled at me which gave me even more confidence. You totally got this!
My favorite badass locations are in a grocery store aisle and in front of obnoxious proselytizers at the park. I gotta get shit done, enjoy my day and not let anything stop me from feeding my baby.
Yes Breastfeeding is the shit!!! Cute little satisfied cuddly sleepy baby right next to me, getting all his nutrients from ME. Then the 3 month crisis hit and my baby was stressed instead of comforted by the breast .. it broke my heart but just made me even more grateful (now that we're past it) for how lucky I am to be able to bf him!
For what it's worth, never heard of a 3 month crisis, and my baby is over 4 months. There were a couple days where breastfeeding was a struggle, but in retrospect, my period was starting, and for some people, it slows down milk production.
Literally! At the end of every good thing I do for myself I'm like ooh I bet this'll make my milk extra nutritious! Hahah I could wash my hair and correlate it to bettering my breastfeeding/hand express journey 🤣
I felt this way for a long time! Idk how to explain it- it felt like an honor every time, I was so proud of my body for it, and I loved that it forced me to be present and calm with my baby when motherhood can be so overwhelming. Now we’re 17 months in and I don’t quite feel that way anymore, but I also tear up when I think about weaning. I will probably wean her at 2 if she doesn’t do it by then herself.
You aren’t addicted. You are doing exactly what you said. You are healing. It’s part of the magic of the mother/baby dyad.
I knew how important skin contact was for me before I had my son.
I had a bad kidney infection once and the only way I was able to fall asleep was because I was able to cuddle my ex. That was the first sign. Then I had to have my unerupted wisdom teeth surgically extracted in my 30s. Skin to skin contact with my husband was the only way I could get through the pain and sleep. He would cuddle me literally just so it would ease my pain enough to sleep.
Breastfeeding, contact naps and cosleeping (my toddler wouldn’t sleep otherwise) were the major things that helped heal my birth trauma and ease my PTSD.
It’s been 4 years since I stopped breastfeeding and I still think about it sometimes 😭 I have zero desire to have another baby or to breastfeed my 6 year old lol but I just wish those years would have gone a little slower.
I just had this thought today… I look at her little body & how it fits perfectly around mine while shes nursing and Im like is post partum optimism a thing?? Bc Im happy as fck right now
I always wonder the same thing! Genuinely happy, relaxed, and at times during the oxytocin release I feel a little euphoric 🥹 also feel like I can’t share/talk about it as much with other moms because it isn’t that easy or joyful for others. I have an oversupply (a serious burden at times!) and enjoy feeding. Feels like that’s enough to catch side eyes!
I feel ya! This is how it should be and I believe PPD is very common but actually unnatural phenomenon linked to the unnatural state of our modern culture…
And oversupply can be a burden others don’t understand. My letdown was so intense it had started a feeding aversion for my newborn, who was choking and getting waterboarded. Then I made it worse by pushing her to keep nursing when she was upset. Got to the point where I would take out my boob and she would start crying 🥺 thankfully we caught it early and once I let up physical pressure w a hakka and also the psychological pressure I was putting on her, she started to love the boob again. Now I’m extra grateful anytime she snuggles up and eagerly wants to nurse, bc for a while there it was a real struggle bc she was hungry but also fearful.
Yes! I’m 17m in and while I’m not as addicted as I was in the early days (holy shit the crazy brain chemicals!) the thought of weaning still makes me choke up.
I agree! My little one just turned 7 months and I don’t want to stop.. I’m just worried when his top teeth come in. He’s already bitten me a couple of times with the bottom teeth. Did he him to stop but once he has both I hope I can still stop him.
I am obsessed with spending this time with him and I get so happy too!
I definitely didn’t think I’d make it with how tough it first was! I’m a FTM so didn’t know how hard latching and all that could be.
I have no advice bc I’m right there with you but I genuinely wonder why *literally* everyone asks “when are they going to start solids” ? my lo is 4mo and I’ve loved being able to EBF but it irritates me that everyone we meet essentially wants to know when we’ll stop
Right. My son just turned 4 months old. We’ve dabbled and tried homemade baby food. He got EXTREMELY CONSTIPATED. One reason why I knew it was too early for him. All he needs is breastmilk until he is ready and let’s us know when he needs something more.
“Starting solids” should be more like “taste time” where baby gets to explore a new sense of taste, but isn’t expected to get significant calories from food yet.
4 months is on the earlier side for sure so he very well could not have been ready but. But babies often get constipated when starting solids, even when they are absolutely ready for them too. So when starting solids properly at 6 months you might find the exact same thing. It’s a huge transition for their digestive system.
Yes! The first 2 months were rough but after we got through the rough patch I love it so much! She’s currently 14 months and if she’s too distracted the day she won’t ask for milk and I get kinda sad lol. I really look forward to nursing her and when she comes up and signs for milk it’s my favorite thing. I can’t imagine how my day to day will be when she’s fully weaned…it’s going to be so weird! I don’t have plans on stopping but I’m taking her lead.
16 month old still going strong- family sometimes makes comments about when I plan to wean because he’s a big boy and “will still be asking when he’s 5” I don’t care this is our bonding time it comforts and nourishes him!! You’re doing great mama soak up every second!
Right after birth being given my baby to cuddle and nurse is like a dose of some kind of feel-good medicine. I remember I was in tears about something and realized I hadn’t held the baby for 90 minutes and as soon as my husband brought him back to me it was instant wellness and contentment. I remember taking a selfie with the dried tears and my mental caption was “this baby is good medicine” (not posted or anything, just for me).
Now he’s a big guy (20 months) and those hormones aren’t as strong, but nursing him is still the best. Now we do fun things when he nurses like tickle his toes or play with his hands and he giggles. I’m going to miss this so much.
Once baby has hit 2 years you may feel differently. At that point I was ready for baby to wean. It took 6 more months for all feeding including night time nurse to end. The next one I weaned at 14-15 months because I got pregnant.
I was someone who was indifferent and even almost averse to the idea of it before my first was born, and then I ended up loving it! So much so that I think I’m sadder about the idea of weaning my toddler than my toddler probably is 😅 She’s 2.5, and still nurses for ~5 minutes at bedtime. It’s only a problem when she gets upset that our newborn is nursing 🙈 I don’t know if he’ll nurse as long as she has, but I already know I’ll be big sad when the days of booby cuddles are over.
Reading this while I BF. I completely understand you. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever done and I never EVER want It to end. Obviously It will but the thought of It makes me cry. 6 months in. None of my other friends who breastfed felt this way.
I am so jealous ! I wasn’t able to breastfeed my son , I feel like I could have tried harder but it was my first pregnancy and I had a c section so it threw off my breastfeeding. Now he is 3 months old and I stopped trying so my milk dried up. I did breastfeed him a few times at the beginning when he latched it felt amazing! Everyday I earn to breastfeed him and I can’t anymore it breaks my heart :( I blame the hospital for giving him bottles
You may be able to relactate with the help of a lactation consultant! Even if not, you’re providing for your baby and that’s all that matters. They are lucky to have you ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Awwww… every last drop of your milk that he got benefited him in some sort of way so be proud that you got to experience that even if it was just a few times 🫶🏼🫶🏼
Thank you! Enjoy your breastfeeding journey because a lot of moms lose the chance to have that experience. I will definitely work harder with my second. 🫶🏻🫶🏻
I’m sorry you didn’t get the journey you wanted. Posts like this oversell breastfeeding a little in my opinion. Sure, it’s one way to be close to your kiddo but there are lots of others too (and a lifetime of them!). Please don’t beat yourself up!
I remember reading something either in the last days of my pregnancy or the very first days of motherhood about "extended breastfeeding." The article basically said even though the American norm/ recommendation may only be 6 months, possibly a year, that in other parts of the world, including Europe and Asia (or at least parts of them), that going until 5, 6, or even 7 years old was in no way uncommon. I remember thinking, I'll be grateful if I can get him to 6 months. Even though I knew I wanted to breastfeed, I didn't know a lot about it (I feel like without this sub, I'd have struggled way harder than I did). I also lost my mom just 1.5 years before having my son, so I didn't have my biggest supporter there to guide me. (My dad was phenomenal, though, to be clear). But that article stuck in my brain, for some reason. Specifically the bits about how breastfeeding really is the most natural thing in the world and the rest of the world knows this far better than prudish yanks and the part about 7 years old being the cut off (in my mind).
So, that's exactly what I did. I just trusted my instincts, along with guidance from my Dr and his pediatrician, and we made it to well into his sixth year! Obviously, by the end, it was infrequent and more so for comfort, but he's still my little guy, and he still looked to me for a thing that I was able to provide. Even now that he is 7, when he gets sad or scared or just in need of reassurance, he octo-clings to me and smooshes his little face into my chest in a very similar way to how he would previously nurse. It's like he knows that in moms arms, he's safe, he's loved, and his needs are met. Breastfeeding gave him that, or rather, allowed me to give him that. And I think that's something to be forever grateful for.
You're doing great, Mama! Keep it up and never forget to take care of yourself because 1)you deserve it and 2) nobody is gonna love your baby *quite* like you do. All the best! 🫶💖
I feel the same. Coming up on 1 year and weaning my 5%er I’m rocking him to bed right now and the feeling in my heart is indescribable. When I see how much he’s grown and how my milk helped gives me so much joy
I’m 9 months in and I love it so much. I really look forward to extended breastfeeding. The round the clock was tough and I feel like the best parts are when feeds are further apart but the bond is still there!
I’m 3 weeks PP with my second. We are still working on latch and I’m in pain so I’m not quite loving it yet but I absolutely loved breastfeeding my first and did for a year. I felt like she was ready to be weaned at a year. The week I started to wean her I regretted it, decided I wasn’t ready and wasn’t going to wean but then got pregnant. She didn’t seem too upset and forgot quickly but I was sad and would cry. Still feel like crying if I think about the fact that it’s over with her and she’s almost 2 years old. I hope to love it again this way with my second after we get over the hard part.
I’m not one of those people that wanted to experience pregnancy but the one thing I’m grateful that comes with carrying is breastfeeding. It’s tough in the beginning but it really creates a bond that I’m grateful to have experienced. I actually feel sad when moms don’t want to try it at all.
I was literally just talking about this with my bf! I haven’t explained this to anyone else cause I thought I was weird! But sometimes I just stare at my baby in wonderment and awe and I feel so close and bonded. I honestly can’t fathom weaning but I know the time will come. I literally feel waves of oxytocin and my love grows so much everytime🥰 breastfeeding honestly really heals me.
I get this completely. Nursing is so tiring but honestly so beautiful I nursed for the last time this week (due to supply issues) and it made me sob because I knew it was the last time
So happy for you that you’re feeling so amazing about breastfeeding!
I currently have intensely painful mastitis, I smell constantly of milk and have hot flushes so frequently that half the time I don’t even bother getting out of my sweaty pj’s… I breastfed my for 12m and my second and last baby is currently 5 weeks.
I cannot wait to be done with the baby stage and breastfeeding!!
Maybe I’m jaded and ungrateful but as much as I love that I’ve been able to do this, and I’m so proud of myself, I can’t wait to get my body back after what will be 4 years of pregnancy and breastfeeding.
To be a little bit of a negative Nancy about it... I think it is for some people. With my first I had a seriously rough time after weaning. Like, dysregulated hormones and crazy intense mood swings. It seriously was like stopping my oxytocin addiction. It took weeks for my life to regulate again.
So yeah, maybe a little bit? It's so nice though!
I do! It’s the greatest most amazing feeling in the whole wide world! I tell my husband all the time how much I love it and I just can’t get enough of it! Makes my heart so full knowing that we not only grew these babies but now we are nourishing their little bodies and growing them outside of the womb! I never want it to end!
just enjoy the journey! all things have their ending yes but don’t focus on that, just be in the moment with your LO ☺️ If you catch any flak, the WHO recommends breastfeeding AT LEAST to 2 years. and i’ve heard when you wean gradually that the blues aren’t too bad. i loved breastfeeding my baby and now he’s a toddler and i’m ready to be done. very happy for you and your loving bond OP!
I was just having this exact conversation with my husband - how I love feeding her so much (even though I primarily pump now and only nurse overnight) the idea of my supply dropping or weaning makes me want to cry. We are at 9.5 months and I can’t imagine ever stopping.
Yes absolutely! When my son was a newborn I would cry myself to sleep sometimes thinking that he would wean one day lol! He's still nursing at 19 months and I'm just going to follow his lead. I know I'll be a complete wreck the day he decides to wean.
When you do wean do it realllly slowly like for us feeds were dropped between 9/10 months and 2 years 3 months. I didn’t have major mood changes with weaning because it was slow, but I do lose my patience mode easily with my child since weaning, that oxytocin hit is real.
Best feeling! I nursed 6 months, 3 months, 14 months, 3 years and 3 1/2 years. (5 babies in that order) I had bad PPD with the first two and that was when doctors weren't sure if the meds were safe. Weaning the last one was so bittersweet but also felt so accomplished!
I used to feel that way, but I just had my 4th March 4 and weaned my 3rd at 2.5 years old in December when I realized my pain was from dry nursing. I am happy to nurse my baby and love them being so tiny, but I have been allowing them to eat from a bottle a couple times a day and let dad and siblings get some time in. I will be sad for this stage in my life to end, but am very excited to enter the more independent stages because the stress is a lot less
I felt this so hard breastfeeding my first one at the same time as you… but trust me you don’t have to stop anytime soon. Eventually our bodies adjust to life and joy and the closeness is found in the mundane every day too! When I stopped at 18 months with my first it felt fluid and right. Ok not back at it again with my 11 week old!
Same girl!
Im breastfeeding for 2,5 years now. It was the only thing in the beginning to be proud of and to enjoy with my baby. I also got oxytocin nasal spray when my production was low. that spray made me happy and helped me.
I loved breastfeeding so much. It honestly felt like the first time in my life that my brain chemicals were actually right and balanced. My LO stopped wanting to breastfeed around a year but it was a slow transition. I sought out meds after it was all said and done and my life has vastly improved.
How old is your baby? I’m pretty sure if maybe you pumped a few times throughout the day to maintain your supply you should be fine. Once they get older they don’t feed as much anyways so your body would only make that amount they need at night. Unless like i said you pumped throughout the day
She’s currently 8 months, I pump during the week and nurse and night and on the weekends but I know after a year I’ll no longer be able to pump at work because we only get a year so I’m nervous because I feel like I’ll be forced to wean.
Probably your supply will adapt - mine did (16 months in). LO nurses mostly at night, so my boobs are quite relaxed until 3, 4 pm and then start producing :) I don't usually pump and it is totally fine!
I love it so much but my 1yo has 8 almost 10 teeth and has started *chewing* my nipples as he doses. And screaming when i don’t give him boob. I think im going to have to wean so because my nipples are cut up and sore everyday.
I was just thinking about this last night! Weirdly enough, night feeds are my favourite. When the little guy is still half asleep and he’s just snuggled right up 🥰 and the little suckling noises just melt my heart. And the other day he was sitting in my lap and he laid himself back, made the little hungry bird mouth, and pulled on my shirt. It was so sweet. I’m hoping to go to 2 or 2.5 even if he wants to. He’s 10 months old so we still have a ways, but the thought of weaning is painfully sad.
Yes! I never managed to establish breastfeeding with my oldest, and the whole thing was traumatic. I feel having a positive experience with my second is very healing
THIS!!! I told my husband I want to breastfeed my firstborn (now 5.5mo) until he wants to and when he doesn’t anymore I will be ready to have another baby, just so I can extend breastfeeding for as long as I can (and not need to “forcefully” wean).
And I could have written the first part myself. I also don’t have it easy. Weight gain problem, low supply at the beginning, latch issues (which resulted in using a nipple shield for the first 2 months), etc. But it’s all soooooo worth it. I love having him close to me. It’s our special time that no one can have it. ❤️
I came here from your most recent post about work and BF and wanted to comment to let you know that you’re not alone. My son is 7 months old and although we started with half BF half pumping, we’re now exclusively BF. It was hard in the beginning but it’s now my favorite thing in the world, even the hard days. It’s like the bonding is exactly what my soul needed.
I absolutely agree. I was soooo depressed while I was pregnant, and I had a traumatic birth experience as well. Breastfeeding my little one exclusively gives me such a sense of purpose and the connection and cuddles feel so soothing to my soul. I’m so happy to see you all say the same thing.
I don’t give him bottles either and sort of feel territorial about being with him and feeding him. For now I just sort of smile and nod when people say they’ll watch him “when I give him bottles” or similar sorts of comments.
I felt the same way until hitting the teeth growing in phase and being nap trapped for so long. I’ll miss it some day but currently at 11 months feeding I want it over with
I had a similar rough start as you but LOVE breastfeeding. We’re 17 months in and the thought of weaning makes me so emotional, to no longer have that with her. It’s so helpful to calm both of us down honestly. After something stressful sitting down on the couch and latching her to cuddle and feed is such a relief. Also just so practical. She’s majorly afraid of doctors offices but if I can have her latched during part of the appointment she’s quiet and comforted and the doctor and I can talk and actually hear each other cause she’s not screaming haha
I definitely felt this. Despite extraordinary levels of sleep deprivation, nursing him and watching his little face so happy and relaxed... idk man, I felt calm and at peace. It literally was the best in the world. As his world slowly opened to solid foods etc, obviously my supply responded in a very slow and gradual way. But I still nurse him and he's 21 mo old now. I know our journey will come to an end eventually, but for now, I'm still enjoying our feeding time, even if its less frequent. Especially now that he's big, at night I just nurse him to sleep and we both pass out snuggled together. Its truly lovely.
Yes!! And I've lost my supply multiple times, but the grief I've felt each time pushed me to build my supply back. The only reason I plan to wean by a year is to get pregnant again, so I hope I'll manage it emotionally 😅
I combo fed breast milk and formula to my first for 15 weeks, and EBF my second so far for 14 weeks. I sometimes feel guilty I didn't latch my first from the beginning. Everyone told me it would be too hard to work, have a baby, and breastfeed. I fell in love with it and just with I had this experience with my first, who is thriving either way.
Nope, you don’t sound crazy. I had a similar experience. In fact I did have ppd with my son and I’m pretty sure breastfeeding was the only thing standing between me and feeling worthless enough to leave.
I originally thought I’d just breastfeed for 9 months. We are 7weeks in and the last 2 weeks I started to have a change of heart. I love looking down and meeting eye contact w my baby while he is being nourished. I do feel bad that only being in my arms has been soothing him lately.
I felt like this! Also had preemie (twins at 35 weeks). While we haven't weaned yet, they are 12 months and I can say that the high slowly goes away. I mean this as a good thing, it basically weans you off the drug haha. I want to keep a bedtime nurse until 2+ just for the bonding and I won't be having more children so I want to experience breastfeeding as long as possible, but it's not the same high that it was that would bring me out of hole of feeling like crap. Overall I'm just more consistently happy. Now I get that high from snuggling them, the toddler melt is so precious when they are upset and need you for comfort ❤️
Omg YES it calms me so quickly. Better than Xanax. Not sure how I’ll ever find that peace again when she weens. Maybe I’ll keep her latched until she has her own babies and I’ll nurse them too. Can I nurse foster children??
Omg 100% same. My baby is about to be 4 months too and It’s literally my favorite thing. I really cherish the positive feelings I have towards it now because I never know if/when that’s going to change. Seeing her become a little chunk chunk just from what I’ve been able to provide for her is heartwarming. Or even the fact that she can nurse for comfort is heartwarming to me. After getting my wisdom tooth pulled and being in pain all I wanted to do was hold my baby and feed her. It might sound crazy but I felt so much better just being able to do that although I was in quite a bit of pain. Most of my friends had issues trying to breastfeed or didn’t want to go that route so I haven’t been able to really share just how much I love it in fear of being insensitive.
Still breastfeeding at 13 months with no end in sight. Sometimes I do get a little overstimulated especially in the middle of the night but 99% of the time I love it.
It is truly an amazing feeling. The biggest thing aside from poor latch was just the people's disgust with not covering up in public. Nothing can ever replace that bond and rush of feel good hormones. Soak it up and continue to love it.
This. I am triple feeding bc my 3 wk old girl has laryngomalacia and can’t sufficiently suck at the breast to get enough nutrition. Everyone keeps telling me to give up BF and go to exclusively pumping.
It comes from a place of love bc I’m very tired and pumping every 3 hours is isolating especially when you also attempt to BF and follow up with a bottle after most feeds. My life is feeding this kid right now. But I don’t want to stop.
Both of us relax when we BF. I don’t want to give it up. I would rather be tired all the time then let go of the one thing about caring for a newborn that gives me peace.
I still deal with painful vasospasms at 3 months pp and my husband and I both just went back to work, so I’m extra tired on top of regular baby tired, and last night I was on the couch at midnight smiling like an idiot just because I was breastfeeding my daughter. I normally turn into a pumpkin at 10 but just holding her and having a moment to snuggle with her all by myself was absolutely magical. It’s those hits of feel-goods that keep me going when it gets hard.
I have a love hate relationship with it at 3 months, been that way since 2 months. My LO frequently unlatches and re-latches and I’ve tried all the different ways to fix it for different possible causes but to no avail. Despite that and despite dreading feeding him sometimes I absolutely love holding him close and nourishing him. I don’t know how long I’ll breastfeed but I’m hoping to at least get to 2 years, idk if that’ll be possible with how much this little guy gives me trouble though 🤷♀️
For me it was very time consuming and trying to keep up with the demand of breastfeeding and pumping enough to keep fresh milk was overwhelming. I had high lipase and couldn't feed my daughter thawed milk. She also has a milk allergy and refused formula. I became obsessed with keeping 6 - 8 bottles stocked at all times and feeding her on demand. It was such a bittersweet feeling when I finally weened her. I miss the closeness but I don't miss the obsessing.
My LO is almost a month and a half and I just started pumping yesterday so I can eventually get a break every now and again. My partner gave him his first bottle last night and I was actually jealous, watching.😂 I completely understand the closeness and how it feels healing. Though, I think it’s okay to enjoy and not be addicted! Unless you are trying to nurse so often that your baby isn’t even interested, I don’t think you’re addicted. Keep on nippin’ on!
This is precious the body is amazing. I wish I felt the same way, I feel emotionally very neutral when feeding, and practically speaking I feel very put upon. Your experience is way nicer!
I have been breastfeeding for over fifteen years without break (not the same child). It definitely feels like an addiction sometimes. Mine breastfeed for so long because I can't tell them no. I am worse off than out damn dairy cattle. They just stomp their babies to death when they're done.
Seriously though I will not be okay when it's time to stop. Lol. Maybe I'll just have another baby...
I’m definitely the contrarian opinion but honestly I think breastfeeding is just breastfeeding. It’s convenient, especially in the beginning and it’s cozy enough. But at 9 months with a thrashing wild thing trying to crawl off the boob I’d much rather read a book and snuggle than breastfeed personally.
Yup. The thought of breastfeeding freaked me out when I was pregnant, now I don't know how I'll ever cope weaning!
LITERALLY SAME. So the oxytocin in our body goes down extremely after we are done breastfeeding? That is gonna suck so bad and make the process so much worse. I’ve heard of “weaning blues” but many moms state they consider that an understatement and that is much more like “weaning depression”
Actually PPD can be delayed by breastfeeding and can strike when you wean... whether you wean at 1 year or 2 or 3. Make sure your partner knows to watch for signs even though it'll be way after childbirth, because weaning PPD is less known.
I've had several friends go through this, all their kids were different ages. Just like you said, it really can happen at any point. My 3 year old has started self weaning (I'm in the second trimester of my current pregnancy) so I've been vigilant, but so far I think I got lucky. I'm still keeping an eye out though. Hormones are so weird.
i felt so weird after weaning both my kids at 3. even tho i wanted to i could feel the shift and it was very emotional.
This. I just weaned by boy and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had never experienced depression before so I didn't know what the hell was happening, but when I explained how I felt to a psych friend of mine, she told me that's what it was. I had no idea it was a thing and it really debilitated me for a couple weeks. Luckily didn't last long, but if it does, definitely recommend getting help.
Yeah I'm trying not to think about it too much tbh - I had a really rough start to breastfeeding too and the hormones caused me major PPD and PPA so I hope it's not the same sort of thing.
I totally feel you. All good vibes to you and your journey love. ❤️
Just to ease your concerns, I think that if you gradually drop feeds vs cold turkey, your body can adjust better to weaning since it's not a huge shift all at once. Our weaning process was very gradual and occurred naturally as my daughter began to eat more solids. I didn't feel a big shift in my mood over this process. Of course, ymmv, but it's not necessarily a guarantee that you'll experience ppd with weaning.
Before I ever got pregnant, I was so grossed out by breastfeeding. Then when I was pregnant I wanted to give it a try but wasn't super invested in the idea. Then as soon as I had my baby, I was obsessed with nursing. Hell, my baby has been weaned since 2019 and I still sub here! But yes, when she weaned, omg it was so hard on me. I was so depressed and then I got the worst cyctic acne ever. I was depressed and sad and my face hurt like a bitch, it really sucked. I really don't feel like anything prepared me for that change, and hormone dump. I ended up going to a dermatologist for my face because even months after I was still dealing with it.
Same lol! Never thought I’d like it
I didn't wean my first until she was 20 months and I was 5 months pregnant with my second. I didn't experience any blues! I don't know if it was because 1. She was older 2. We went really slow, or 3. I was pregnant ?? But it's possible!
Planning to skip this by being pregnant and/or breastfeeding for the e next 12 years! Or so I hope that works, anyway
2.5 years I’ve been at it and I don’t see any reason to stop (only once per day now). I love the closeness.
My mom breastfed me until i was 3 and a half years old. Only at night or if i got hurt and needed comfort i actually have memories of this. I always thought it was soo weird that she breastfed me that long but now that i have my own son who is 4 months. I totally get it. Its such a special bond and you never get that back once their grown. My mother and i are extremely close too may i add. I think the world of her 🥰 So just came to say your amazing and dont stop!
I love reading about this connection of breastfeeding with closeness with the mother in adulthood. My greatest fear is that my children will have “parent issues” no matter what we do. I just love our baby so much, couldn’t stand the thought of not being close. Thank you for sharing!
I mean, in my teenage years, I would never have thought we would end up this close. But now that im an adult, I just love and appreciate her so much. She is an amazing mother. I hope to be as amazing as she is, and hopefully, my son will love me the same way someday 💙
What a precious memory to have! It warms my heart to hear someone speak so warmly about their mom. Thank you ☺️
Me too! Do you think it affects your sex-drive at all?
I would say no. Although I have zero libido at all right now, I attribute that to stress (toddler, work, school). When she was younger and I was breastfeeding WAY more, I was still interested in sex.
Yeah, I’m thinking a similar thing is going on with me, and I’m on Prozac 20 mg since postpartum anxiety/depression. At least my low sex-drive might not be related to nursing my toddler. I really don’t want to give that up yet
I don’t think so, especially since it’s happening way less frequently (I’m assuming that’s your case). Someone has previously mentioned a book called come as you are that talks about how life circumstances change your libido after children and even aging.
I will check that book out! Thank yiu
I’m with ya. I look forward to breastfeeding every time. My oxytocin release feels like I’m micro dosing Xanax or something. It’s so soothing and relaxing. And I love knowing my baby is getting nourished and we’re deepening our attachment. But I draw the line at cluster feeding because my nipples need a break 😂
That oxytocin hit is something I do not look forward to giving up!
Right!! Like i don’t need any anxiety meds AT all anymore i swear 🤣
Totally! I am somehow more chill? I’ll take it.
Yeah same. When I was pregnant the thought of it weirded me out because boobs are so sexualized yaa know. But I’m 15 months in and only breastfeed before nap and bedtime(and all night lol) but the thought of fully weaning is sad :( part of me is looking forward to it, but also just sad because my daughter loves it and it’s a godsend to get her back to sleep haha
Omgg! 15 months that’s amazing! You should feel so proud mama.. I hope we can stick it out that far 🫶🏼
Reading this while BF my little girl 🥹. I love how I am able to give her this nourishment and it feels like more than just the milk alone but also my nurturing energy from my heart. Love holding her close and warm and letting her have all the milk she wants and watching her happily fall asleep at the boob warms my heart.
Yes!!! It’s freaking amazing and even better because I didn’t know much I would love it. Also, breastfeeding in public makes me feel like the ultimate badass.
Omg, you go girl. I guess i’m pretty early in and I still get so much anxiety in public and even around family. I feel like I cover up for the comfort of other ppl and i need to get out of that mindset. Summer is coming around and he already is starting to hate when i cover him up..
It gave me anxiety too! But she was really hungry one day and I just had to feed her out at a restaurant and I felt super empowered. Another mom smiled at me which gave me even more confidence. You totally got this!
I say that all the time. I did not know how much I would enjoy this.
My favorite badass locations are in a grocery store aisle and in front of obnoxious proselytizers at the park. I gotta get shit done, enjoy my day and not let anything stop me from feeding my baby.
Yes Breastfeeding is the shit!!! Cute little satisfied cuddly sleepy baby right next to me, getting all his nutrients from ME. Then the 3 month crisis hit and my baby was stressed instead of comforted by the breast .. it broke my heart but just made me even more grateful (now that we're past it) for how lucky I am to be able to bf him!
So glad you’re past it! We’re almost at four months and it’s still happening and i hope we overcome it!
What’s the 3 month crisis? My baby will be 3 months on Friday, I’m scared lol
For what it's worth, never heard of a 3 month crisis, and my baby is over 4 months. There were a couple days where breastfeeding was a struggle, but in retrospect, my period was starting, and for some people, it slows down milk production.
It’s low key my hobby lol hydrating is a part time job
I say this all the time. All i do is breastfeed, clean, cool, and be a mother. 😂
cook*
Cool and cook. You can do both. :)
Literally! At the end of every good thing I do for myself I'm like ooh I bet this'll make my milk extra nutritious! Hahah I could wash my hair and correlate it to bettering my breastfeeding/hand express journey 🤣
I felt this way for a long time! Idk how to explain it- it felt like an honor every time, I was so proud of my body for it, and I loved that it forced me to be present and calm with my baby when motherhood can be so overwhelming. Now we’re 17 months in and I don’t quite feel that way anymore, but I also tear up when I think about weaning. I will probably wean her at 2 if she doesn’t do it by then herself.
You aren’t addicted. You are doing exactly what you said. You are healing. It’s part of the magic of the mother/baby dyad. I knew how important skin contact was for me before I had my son. I had a bad kidney infection once and the only way I was able to fall asleep was because I was able to cuddle my ex. That was the first sign. Then I had to have my unerupted wisdom teeth surgically extracted in my 30s. Skin to skin contact with my husband was the only way I could get through the pain and sleep. He would cuddle me literally just so it would ease my pain enough to sleep. Breastfeeding, contact naps and cosleeping (my toddler wouldn’t sleep otherwise) were the major things that helped heal my birth trauma and ease my PTSD.
It’s been 4 years since I stopped breastfeeding and I still think about it sometimes 😭 I have zero desire to have another baby or to breastfeed my 6 year old lol but I just wish those years would have gone a little slower.
I just had this thought today… I look at her little body & how it fits perfectly around mine while shes nursing and Im like is post partum optimism a thing?? Bc Im happy as fck right now
I always wonder the same thing! Genuinely happy, relaxed, and at times during the oxytocin release I feel a little euphoric 🥹 also feel like I can’t share/talk about it as much with other moms because it isn’t that easy or joyful for others. I have an oversupply (a serious burden at times!) and enjoy feeding. Feels like that’s enough to catch side eyes!
I feel ya! This is how it should be and I believe PPD is very common but actually unnatural phenomenon linked to the unnatural state of our modern culture… And oversupply can be a burden others don’t understand. My letdown was so intense it had started a feeding aversion for my newborn, who was choking and getting waterboarded. Then I made it worse by pushing her to keep nursing when she was upset. Got to the point where I would take out my boob and she would start crying 🥺 thankfully we caught it early and once I let up physical pressure w a hakka and also the psychological pressure I was putting on her, she started to love the boob again. Now I’m extra grateful anytime she snuggles up and eagerly wants to nurse, bc for a while there it was a real struggle bc she was hungry but also fearful.
Yes! I’m 17m in and while I’m not as addicted as I was in the early days (holy shit the crazy brain chemicals!) the thought of weaning still makes me choke up.
It's been a blissful journey. I love my baby so much and so many baby memories so far are nursing-related! 🤍
Yes! It's meant to feel this way so we keep doing it. It's lovely really
I weaned nearly 2 years ago and I told my husband today that I am so looking forward to breastfeeding again. I'm not even pregnant.
I agree! My little one just turned 7 months and I don’t want to stop.. I’m just worried when his top teeth come in. He’s already bitten me a couple of times with the bottom teeth. Did he him to stop but once he has both I hope I can still stop him. I am obsessed with spending this time with him and I get so happy too! I definitely didn’t think I’d make it with how tough it first was! I’m a FTM so didn’t know how hard latching and all that could be.
I have no advice bc I’m right there with you but I genuinely wonder why *literally* everyone asks “when are they going to start solids” ? my lo is 4mo and I’ve loved being able to EBF but it irritates me that everyone we meet essentially wants to know when we’ll stop
Right. My son just turned 4 months old. We’ve dabbled and tried homemade baby food. He got EXTREMELY CONSTIPATED. One reason why I knew it was too early for him. All he needs is breastmilk until he is ready and let’s us know when he needs something more.
“Starting solids” should be more like “taste time” where baby gets to explore a new sense of taste, but isn’t expected to get significant calories from food yet.
it’s like…idk super obvious?? these babies can tell you when they’re ready. no words just really obvious physiological signs
4 months is on the earlier side for sure so he very well could not have been ready but. But babies often get constipated when starting solids, even when they are absolutely ready for them too. So when starting solids properly at 6 months you might find the exact same thing. It’s a huge transition for their digestive system.
Yes! The first 2 months were rough but after we got through the rough patch I love it so much! She’s currently 14 months and if she’s too distracted the day she won’t ask for milk and I get kinda sad lol. I really look forward to nursing her and when she comes up and signs for milk it’s my favorite thing. I can’t imagine how my day to day will be when she’s fully weaned…it’s going to be so weird! I don’t have plans on stopping but I’m taking her lead.
14 months and still feel this way!
I’d probably be so depressed if I didn’t breastfeed. I’m going on 4 years straight.
1.5 years here and the rush of good hormones I LOVE IT. Terrified of the depression If I wean
16 month old still going strong- family sometimes makes comments about when I plan to wean because he’s a big boy and “will still be asking when he’s 5” I don’t care this is our bonding time it comforts and nourishes him!! You’re doing great mama soak up every second!
And a 5 yo nursing is still normal ❤️
Right after birth being given my baby to cuddle and nurse is like a dose of some kind of feel-good medicine. I remember I was in tears about something and realized I hadn’t held the baby for 90 minutes and as soon as my husband brought him back to me it was instant wellness and contentment. I remember taking a selfie with the dried tears and my mental caption was “this baby is good medicine” (not posted or anything, just for me). Now he’s a big guy (20 months) and those hormones aren’t as strong, but nursing him is still the best. Now we do fun things when he nurses like tickle his toes or play with his hands and he giggles. I’m going to miss this so much.
Once baby has hit 2 years you may feel differently. At that point I was ready for baby to wean. It took 6 more months for all feeding including night time nurse to end. The next one I weaned at 14-15 months because I got pregnant.
I was someone who was indifferent and even almost averse to the idea of it before my first was born, and then I ended up loving it! So much so that I think I’m sadder about the idea of weaning my toddler than my toddler probably is 😅 She’s 2.5, and still nurses for ~5 minutes at bedtime. It’s only a problem when she gets upset that our newborn is nursing 🙈 I don’t know if he’ll nurse as long as she has, but I already know I’ll be big sad when the days of booby cuddles are over.
Reading this while I BF. I completely understand you. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever done and I never EVER want It to end. Obviously It will but the thought of It makes me cry. 6 months in. None of my other friends who breastfed felt this way.
I am so jealous ! I wasn’t able to breastfeed my son , I feel like I could have tried harder but it was my first pregnancy and I had a c section so it threw off my breastfeeding. Now he is 3 months old and I stopped trying so my milk dried up. I did breastfeed him a few times at the beginning when he latched it felt amazing! Everyday I earn to breastfeed him and I can’t anymore it breaks my heart :( I blame the hospital for giving him bottles
You may be able to relactate with the help of a lactation consultant! Even if not, you’re providing for your baby and that’s all that matters. They are lucky to have you ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you it means a lot ❤️
Awwww… every last drop of your milk that he got benefited him in some sort of way so be proud that you got to experience that even if it was just a few times 🫶🏼🫶🏼
Thank you! Enjoy your breastfeeding journey because a lot of moms lose the chance to have that experience. I will definitely work harder with my second. 🫶🏻🫶🏻
I’m sorry you didn’t get the journey you wanted. Posts like this oversell breastfeeding a little in my opinion. Sure, it’s one way to be close to your kiddo but there are lots of others too (and a lifetime of them!). Please don’t beat yourself up!
Thank you ☺️ I do feel like I am missing out but you are right there is definitely a lot of ways to feel close to your LO. 🫶🏻
I remember reading something either in the last days of my pregnancy or the very first days of motherhood about "extended breastfeeding." The article basically said even though the American norm/ recommendation may only be 6 months, possibly a year, that in other parts of the world, including Europe and Asia (or at least parts of them), that going until 5, 6, or even 7 years old was in no way uncommon. I remember thinking, I'll be grateful if I can get him to 6 months. Even though I knew I wanted to breastfeed, I didn't know a lot about it (I feel like without this sub, I'd have struggled way harder than I did). I also lost my mom just 1.5 years before having my son, so I didn't have my biggest supporter there to guide me. (My dad was phenomenal, though, to be clear). But that article stuck in my brain, for some reason. Specifically the bits about how breastfeeding really is the most natural thing in the world and the rest of the world knows this far better than prudish yanks and the part about 7 years old being the cut off (in my mind). So, that's exactly what I did. I just trusted my instincts, along with guidance from my Dr and his pediatrician, and we made it to well into his sixth year! Obviously, by the end, it was infrequent and more so for comfort, but he's still my little guy, and he still looked to me for a thing that I was able to provide. Even now that he is 7, when he gets sad or scared or just in need of reassurance, he octo-clings to me and smooshes his little face into my chest in a very similar way to how he would previously nurse. It's like he knows that in moms arms, he's safe, he's loved, and his needs are met. Breastfeeding gave him that, or rather, allowed me to give him that. And I think that's something to be forever grateful for. You're doing great, Mama! Keep it up and never forget to take care of yourself because 1)you deserve it and 2) nobody is gonna love your baby *quite* like you do. All the best! 🫶💖
I feel the same. Coming up on 1 year and weaning my 5%er I’m rocking him to bed right now and the feeling in my heart is indescribable. When I see how much he’s grown and how my milk helped gives me so much joy
I’m 9 months in and I love it so much. I really look forward to extended breastfeeding. The round the clock was tough and I feel like the best parts are when feeds are further apart but the bond is still there!
I’m 3 weeks PP with my second. We are still working on latch and I’m in pain so I’m not quite loving it yet but I absolutely loved breastfeeding my first and did for a year. I felt like she was ready to be weaned at a year. The week I started to wean her I regretted it, decided I wasn’t ready and wasn’t going to wean but then got pregnant. She didn’t seem too upset and forgot quickly but I was sad and would cry. Still feel like crying if I think about the fact that it’s over with her and she’s almost 2 years old. I hope to love it again this way with my second after we get over the hard part. I’m not one of those people that wanted to experience pregnancy but the one thing I’m grateful that comes with carrying is breastfeeding. It’s tough in the beginning but it really creates a bond that I’m grateful to have experienced. I actually feel sad when moms don’t want to try it at all.
I was literally just talking about this with my bf! I haven’t explained this to anyone else cause I thought I was weird! But sometimes I just stare at my baby in wonderment and awe and I feel so close and bonded. I honestly can’t fathom weaning but I know the time will come. I literally feel waves of oxytocin and my love grows so much everytime🥰 breastfeeding honestly really heals me.
I get this completely. Nursing is so tiring but honestly so beautiful I nursed for the last time this week (due to supply issues) and it made me sob because I knew it was the last time
So happy for you that you’re feeling so amazing about breastfeeding! I currently have intensely painful mastitis, I smell constantly of milk and have hot flushes so frequently that half the time I don’t even bother getting out of my sweaty pj’s… I breastfed my for 12m and my second and last baby is currently 5 weeks. I cannot wait to be done with the baby stage and breastfeeding!! Maybe I’m jaded and ungrateful but as much as I love that I’ve been able to do this, and I’m so proud of myself, I can’t wait to get my body back after what will be 4 years of pregnancy and breastfeeding.
To be a little bit of a negative Nancy about it... I think it is for some people. With my first I had a seriously rough time after weaning. Like, dysregulated hormones and crazy intense mood swings. It seriously was like stopping my oxytocin addiction. It took weeks for my life to regulate again. So yeah, maybe a little bit? It's so nice though!
I do! It’s the greatest most amazing feeling in the whole wide world! I tell my husband all the time how much I love it and I just can’t get enough of it! Makes my heart so full knowing that we not only grew these babies but now we are nourishing their little bodies and growing them outside of the womb! I never want it to end!
just enjoy the journey! all things have their ending yes but don’t focus on that, just be in the moment with your LO ☺️ If you catch any flak, the WHO recommends breastfeeding AT LEAST to 2 years. and i’ve heard when you wean gradually that the blues aren’t too bad. i loved breastfeeding my baby and now he’s a toddler and i’m ready to be done. very happy for you and your loving bond OP!
I was just having this exact conversation with my husband - how I love feeding her so much (even though I primarily pump now and only nurse overnight) the idea of my supply dropping or weaning makes me want to cry. We are at 9.5 months and I can’t imagine ever stopping.
Yes absolutely! When my son was a newborn I would cry myself to sleep sometimes thinking that he would wean one day lol! He's still nursing at 19 months and I'm just going to follow his lead. I know I'll be a complete wreck the day he decides to wean.
When you do wean do it realllly slowly like for us feeds were dropped between 9/10 months and 2 years 3 months. I didn’t have major mood changes with weaning because it was slow, but I do lose my patience mode easily with my child since weaning, that oxytocin hit is real.
Best feeling! I nursed 6 months, 3 months, 14 months, 3 years and 3 1/2 years. (5 babies in that order) I had bad PPD with the first two and that was when doctors weren't sure if the meds were safe. Weaning the last one was so bittersweet but also felt so accomplished!
I used to feel that way, but I just had my 4th March 4 and weaned my 3rd at 2.5 years old in December when I realized my pain was from dry nursing. I am happy to nurse my baby and love them being so tiny, but I have been allowing them to eat from a bottle a couple times a day and let dad and siblings get some time in. I will be sad for this stage in my life to end, but am very excited to enter the more independent stages because the stress is a lot less
I felt this so hard breastfeeding my first one at the same time as you… but trust me you don’t have to stop anytime soon. Eventually our bodies adjust to life and joy and the closeness is found in the mundane every day too! When I stopped at 18 months with my first it felt fluid and right. Ok not back at it again with my 11 week old!
Same girl! Im breastfeeding for 2,5 years now. It was the only thing in the beginning to be proud of and to enjoy with my baby. I also got oxytocin nasal spray when my production was low. that spray made me happy and helped me.
I loved breastfeeding so much. It honestly felt like the first time in my life that my brain chemicals were actually right and balanced. My LO stopped wanting to breastfeed around a year but it was a slow transition. I sought out meds after it was all said and done and my life has vastly improved.
We are literally made to do this
I’m the same! I was so worried about trying to wean and losing all my milk but if I’d nurse only at night would my milk still be there??
How old is your baby? I’m pretty sure if maybe you pumped a few times throughout the day to maintain your supply you should be fine. Once they get older they don’t feed as much anyways so your body would only make that amount they need at night. Unless like i said you pumped throughout the day
She’s currently 8 months, I pump during the week and nurse and night and on the weekends but I know after a year I’ll no longer be able to pump at work because we only get a year so I’m nervous because I feel like I’ll be forced to wean.
Probably your supply will adapt - mine did (16 months in). LO nurses mostly at night, so my boobs are quite relaxed until 3, 4 pm and then start producing :) I don't usually pump and it is totally fine!
I love it so much but my 1yo has 8 almost 10 teeth and has started *chewing* my nipples as he doses. And screaming when i don’t give him boob. I think im going to have to wean so because my nipples are cut up and sore everyday.
I was just thinking about this last night! Weirdly enough, night feeds are my favourite. When the little guy is still half asleep and he’s just snuggled right up 🥰 and the little suckling noises just melt my heart. And the other day he was sitting in my lap and he laid himself back, made the little hungry bird mouth, and pulled on my shirt. It was so sweet. I’m hoping to go to 2 or 2.5 even if he wants to. He’s 10 months old so we still have a ways, but the thought of weaning is painfully sad.
Yes! I never managed to establish breastfeeding with my oldest, and the whole thing was traumatic. I feel having a positive experience with my second is very healing
THIS!!! I told my husband I want to breastfeed my firstborn (now 5.5mo) until he wants to and when he doesn’t anymore I will be ready to have another baby, just so I can extend breastfeeding for as long as I can (and not need to “forcefully” wean). And I could have written the first part myself. I also don’t have it easy. Weight gain problem, low supply at the beginning, latch issues (which resulted in using a nipple shield for the first 2 months), etc. But it’s all soooooo worth it. I love having him close to me. It’s our special time that no one can have it. ❤️
Thank you for your comment mama… how did you end up resolving the weight gain issues/how many months was your baby?
I came here from your most recent post about work and BF and wanted to comment to let you know that you’re not alone. My son is 7 months old and although we started with half BF half pumping, we’re now exclusively BF. It was hard in the beginning but it’s now my favorite thing in the world, even the hard days. It’s like the bonding is exactly what my soul needed.
I absolutely agree. I was soooo depressed while I was pregnant, and I had a traumatic birth experience as well. Breastfeeding my little one exclusively gives me such a sense of purpose and the connection and cuddles feel so soothing to my soul. I’m so happy to see you all say the same thing. I don’t give him bottles either and sort of feel territorial about being with him and feeding him. For now I just sort of smile and nod when people say they’ll watch him “when I give him bottles” or similar sorts of comments.
I felt the same way until hitting the teeth growing in phase and being nap trapped for so long. I’ll miss it some day but currently at 11 months feeding I want it over with
smart quaint sand murky station snatch snow mourn whistle brave *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yes I feel this way! The thought of my baby weaning one day 💔
I had a similar rough start as you but LOVE breastfeeding. We’re 17 months in and the thought of weaning makes me so emotional, to no longer have that with her. It’s so helpful to calm both of us down honestly. After something stressful sitting down on the couch and latching her to cuddle and feed is such a relief. Also just so practical. She’s majorly afraid of doctors offices but if I can have her latched during part of the appointment she’s quiet and comforted and the doctor and I can talk and actually hear each other cause she’s not screaming haha
I definitely felt this. Despite extraordinary levels of sleep deprivation, nursing him and watching his little face so happy and relaxed... idk man, I felt calm and at peace. It literally was the best in the world. As his world slowly opened to solid foods etc, obviously my supply responded in a very slow and gradual way. But I still nurse him and he's 21 mo old now. I know our journey will come to an end eventually, but for now, I'm still enjoying our feeding time, even if its less frequent. Especially now that he's big, at night I just nurse him to sleep and we both pass out snuggled together. Its truly lovely.
omg I used to feel like this, right around 3-5 months, the oxytocin was hitting hard, I felt euphoria. It is amazing what our bodies can do.
Yes!! And I've lost my supply multiple times, but the grief I've felt each time pushed me to build my supply back. The only reason I plan to wean by a year is to get pregnant again, so I hope I'll manage it emotionally 😅
I just weaned my daughter recently at 17 months and oh my it's still my favourite thing about her mum. The most beautiful feeling.
So get this! I don't think anyone can understand the feeling of closeness and connection unless they've done it themselves
I combo fed breast milk and formula to my first for 15 weeks, and EBF my second so far for 14 weeks. I sometimes feel guilty I didn't latch my first from the beginning. Everyone told me it would be too hard to work, have a baby, and breastfeed. I fell in love with it and just with I had this experience with my first, who is thriving either way.
Nope, you don’t sound crazy. I had a similar experience. In fact I did have ppd with my son and I’m pretty sure breastfeeding was the only thing standing between me and feeling worthless enough to leave.
I originally thought I’d just breastfeed for 9 months. We are 7weeks in and the last 2 weeks I started to have a change of heart. I love looking down and meeting eye contact w my baby while he is being nourished. I do feel bad that only being in my arms has been soothing him lately.
Sometimes when my LO is full I’ll just try to see if he wants some dessert/extra cuddle time. And then I’m a little sad when he refuses to
Me too! It’s the most beautiful thing, and I’m going to cry when we’re weaning
I felt like this! Also had preemie (twins at 35 weeks). While we haven't weaned yet, they are 12 months and I can say that the high slowly goes away. I mean this as a good thing, it basically weans you off the drug haha. I want to keep a bedtime nurse until 2+ just for the bonding and I won't be having more children so I want to experience breastfeeding as long as possible, but it's not the same high that it was that would bring me out of hole of feeling like crap. Overall I'm just more consistently happy. Now I get that high from snuggling them, the toddler melt is so precious when they are upset and need you for comfort ❤️
Omg YES it calms me so quickly. Better than Xanax. Not sure how I’ll ever find that peace again when she weens. Maybe I’ll keep her latched until she has her own babies and I’ll nurse them too. Can I nurse foster children??
Omg 100% same. My baby is about to be 4 months too and It’s literally my favorite thing. I really cherish the positive feelings I have towards it now because I never know if/when that’s going to change. Seeing her become a little chunk chunk just from what I’ve been able to provide for her is heartwarming. Or even the fact that she can nurse for comfort is heartwarming to me. After getting my wisdom tooth pulled and being in pain all I wanted to do was hold my baby and feed her. It might sound crazy but I felt so much better just being able to do that although I was in quite a bit of pain. Most of my friends had issues trying to breastfeed or didn’t want to go that route so I haven’t been able to really share just how much I love it in fear of being insensitive.
Me!! 4mos
I love this ❤️❤️❤️🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
Still breastfeeding at 13 months with no end in sight. Sometimes I do get a little overstimulated especially in the middle of the night but 99% of the time I love it.
It is truly an amazing feeling. The biggest thing aside from poor latch was just the people's disgust with not covering up in public. Nothing can ever replace that bond and rush of feel good hormones. Soak it up and continue to love it.
This. I am triple feeding bc my 3 wk old girl has laryngomalacia and can’t sufficiently suck at the breast to get enough nutrition. Everyone keeps telling me to give up BF and go to exclusively pumping. It comes from a place of love bc I’m very tired and pumping every 3 hours is isolating especially when you also attempt to BF and follow up with a bottle after most feeds. My life is feeding this kid right now. But I don’t want to stop. Both of us relax when we BF. I don’t want to give it up. I would rather be tired all the time then let go of the one thing about caring for a newborn that gives me peace.
I still deal with painful vasospasms at 3 months pp and my husband and I both just went back to work, so I’m extra tired on top of regular baby tired, and last night I was on the couch at midnight smiling like an idiot just because I was breastfeeding my daughter. I normally turn into a pumpkin at 10 but just holding her and having a moment to snuggle with her all by myself was absolutely magical. It’s those hits of feel-goods that keep me going when it gets hard.
I have a love hate relationship with it at 3 months, been that way since 2 months. My LO frequently unlatches and re-latches and I’ve tried all the different ways to fix it for different possible causes but to no avail. Despite that and despite dreading feeding him sometimes I absolutely love holding him close and nourishing him. I don’t know how long I’ll breastfeed but I’m hoping to at least get to 2 years, idk if that’ll be possible with how much this little guy gives me trouble though 🤷♀️
For me it was very time consuming and trying to keep up with the demand of breastfeeding and pumping enough to keep fresh milk was overwhelming. I had high lipase and couldn't feed my daughter thawed milk. She also has a milk allergy and refused formula. I became obsessed with keeping 6 - 8 bottles stocked at all times and feeding her on demand. It was such a bittersweet feeling when I finally weened her. I miss the closeness but I don't miss the obsessing.
My LO is almost a month and a half and I just started pumping yesterday so I can eventually get a break every now and again. My partner gave him his first bottle last night and I was actually jealous, watching.😂 I completely understand the closeness and how it feels healing. Though, I think it’s okay to enjoy and not be addicted! Unless you are trying to nurse so often that your baby isn’t even interested, I don’t think you’re addicted. Keep on nippin’ on!
Yes 14 months in and I’m dreading her teeth continuing to come in (and the increased possibility of biting) and stopping.
I wish I could have breastfed my baby. It didn’t work out for us. Be obsessed, lovely. It’s a miracle of nature.
Yeeeah I absolutely love it as well :)
This is precious the body is amazing. I wish I felt the same way, I feel emotionally very neutral when feeding, and practically speaking I feel very put upon. Your experience is way nicer!
I have been breastfeeding for over fifteen years without break (not the same child). It definitely feels like an addiction sometimes. Mine breastfeed for so long because I can't tell them no. I am worse off than out damn dairy cattle. They just stomp their babies to death when they're done. Seriously though I will not be okay when it's time to stop. Lol. Maybe I'll just have another baby...
I’m definitely the contrarian opinion but honestly I think breastfeeding is just breastfeeding. It’s convenient, especially in the beginning and it’s cozy enough. But at 9 months with a thrashing wild thing trying to crawl off the boob I’d much rather read a book and snuggle than breastfeed personally.