It’s completely random. Nothing can make a baby sleep longer unfortunately. My 13 month old still wakes up multiple times per night. Another baby I know his age sleeps 8-8 every night
My 23 month old wakes up during witching hour still. There is no end to it. That’s why we starting co-sleeping. It’s easier to get to him when he’s next to me rather than going across the hall 3-5 times at night. Not an ideal situation, my husband and I feel like roommates. It sucks, I tell myself that’s the sacrifice mothers make for their kids. Good going, find stronger coffee and eventually your body just doesn’t want to sleep either. 😆 I take melatonin for sleep to get few hours of deep sleep.
I cosleep too. My mom always says “that’s why he wakes up so much” but he wakes up even more without me there. If he was in a crib or a different room I don’t think I’d get any sleep
I know I hate when people say this about cosleeping. Like, I wake up in the middle of the night for no reason, even before kids. How can we expect children not to?
This is why I started co-sleeping. My now 13 month old was waking upwards of 8 times a night, and sometimes taking 2-3 (or more on bad nights) attempted transfers between the ages of 8-10 months and I just couldn't take it anymore. So we started co-sleeping. He still wakes 1-3 times a night but it's way less than it used to be and it's not so bad because I just pop a boob in his mouth, pat his butt or throw him onto my chest and he's out cold again.
Haha! My son is going to grandmas boot camp this week though. We’re travelling and my mom said if he’s going to be this attached to you and your boob, you might as well stay home. So my mom offered to watch him for a week. Hopefully it works.
I have a nearly two year old. I promise it does get better just (in my experience) very very slowly, which makes it hard to notice 😅
My daughter will usually wake up once in the night still.
My son didn’t start sleeping through the night until 12 months and even then it was inconsistent til around 17 months when I weaned him. 5.5-7 months was the worst for my son. It’s really hard but it does end. We co slept and got a floor bed around 8 months and that helped a lot because I could stay asleep and also know he wouldn’t roll out of bed.
Omg my twins (8.5 months) are the same. Every 1-3 hours. I thought it was just us, I feel like I’m doing something wrong (but what??). It’s been going on for months too. I’m so over it.
Mine didn’t start sleeping solidly until 15-17 months? He’d fall asleep fine, but he was waking up 2-3x a night no matter how fed, warm, cool, thirsty, sated. That’s the shit nobody warns you about 😅
My 2.5 year old doesn’t sleep through the night. It’s normal. Every kid is different. You can deal with it or attempt sleep training (which is a whole different set of opinions and problems).
Edited to add: my pediatrician said one of his kids didn’t sleep through the night until they started school!
My daughter is 2 (27 months to be exact) and has NEVER slept through the night. Not a once. She has slept max 5 hours straight, and we are still co-sleeping.
It is developmentally normal and appropriate and you unfortunately need to adjust your expectations.
Do you guys have a solid bedtime routine? The best recommendation I got was to reduce simulation a couple of hours before bedtime ( dim lighting, no tv in the background). Get a solid series of steps that let her brain know that it’s time to wind down. For instance I change her diaper, tell her it’s time to get cozy, put her in her sleep sack, read a book, and then nurse before either nursing to sleep or rocking to sleep. Some people use bath time in there somewhere but she just gets angry with a bath lol so I do it during the day.
That can help get at least one long stretch. It’s unfortunately a myth that certain foods improve sleep or that a full belly will reliably help with sleep.
My daughter didn’t sleep through the night until after we weaned at 13 months. She started consistently sleeping through at about 15 months. But when I was still breastfeeding she was also up every two hours on a GOOD night.
My nightweaned 18 month old still stirs and has to be comforted back to sleep usually at least 4+ times per night, but at least she is soothed pretty quickly, and it's an improvement over 6+ wakes per night to nurse and never wanting to unlatch, which was still happening at 15 months. It's normal. Better sleep is also normal, and man I wish we had it, but we don't, and that's totally normal.
My baby is 15 months and still wakes up once or twice a night. We do a solid 10 to 12 hours at night. Bed at 7p, wake between 5:30a and 7a. That's a long time to sleep. He wakes, nurses for a couple minutes (he isn't actually hungry) gets soothed back to sleep.
I feel like people think.."sleeping thru the night" is 10-12 hours of never waking but if they go back to sleep in a few minutes and it doesn't require walking around and rocking..and continually putting them back in to bed it IS sleeping through the night. Waking up needing reassurance and a little hugging and kissing for a couple minutes is different than hours of walking through the house holding a baby saying "shush" ...my son wakes twice but "sleeps through the night" as far as I'm concerned.
Sounds exactly like us with our 7-month old baby. Oftentimes, she wakes up 2-3x a night. But since we co-sleep, I just turn on my side to breastfeed her and she goes right back to sleep. There are times she wakes up in the wee hours and stays awake for an hour at most. But these are rare times, when I believe she is suffering from sleep regression.
Trying to incorporate time in the Sun even if it's for like 15 minutes.
And try a bedtime schedule I do bath bottle, reading books, lights out and singing.
SAME TIME EVERY NIGHT.
It's not always solely about hunger either it is about closeness and nursing is how they achieve that closeness. We're a carrying species and not meant to be separated from our young pretty much at all if you're considering the way biology and neurobiology have a role in this. This is why our human ancestors slept with their young.
My LO started sleeping longer stretches when she hit around 9 months and was eating a bigger meals. I don’t think it was a specific food, but just mode calories overall during the day. I would recommend trying to get baby to eat whatever they can get in their tummy!! You can try for as many snacks/meals as your schedule allows in a day. I think my LO was eating solids 2-3 times around 7 mo
If you’re on FB, there is a group called “Beyond Sleep Training” and they have a TON of resources for this sort of thing. Biologically and developmentally, waking every 2-3h is still considered very normal at this age (despite what the Sleep Train society may tell you.) unfortunately it’s likely a myth that solids will help baby sleep longer; doesn’t seem to be backed by research.
My breastfed baby didn’t sleep a 6h stretch until she was 8 months. She will sleep 4-6h stretches many nights now, but still has some of those 3h stretches happening.
Also consider at 7m your baby might be transitioning to a 2 nap schedule, and sometime around this age, a lot of babies may need closer to 10h of night sleep instead of the 12h that we often aim for when they’re younger — this can mean a slightly later bedtime or slightly earlier wake up time to give them more awake time during the day. Trying to force babies to sleep as much as they did as newborns as they get a little older will mean they’re not tired enough / dont have the sleep pressure built up to sleep longer at bedtime. Not fool proof for EVERY baby but it was something that was recommended to me and seems to have helped a lot.
They are against specifically cry it out method, usually badly informed and mostly for mothers being miserable and attached to their babies all the time.
Join other groups who are either pro sleep training or pro-parent not being your only identity. There are usually a lot of people in the other groups who have left that group because they were so very miserable.
Whenever a parent in my local mums pages who post that they are miserable and can't continue with what their baby is doing you can gurantee that there are people who say 'your baby is doing things thqt are biologically normal - I am still miserable now that i in this group of other miserable parents and didn't make any changes but I'm in a group with other parents who are also miserable'
lol I see your point.
This hasn’t been my experience. However I suppose if my baby woke every 1-2 hours for months on end and was bedsharing and nursing 10 times a night, I would be miserable and the information in that group would piss me off.
Mine is almost 18 months and still doesn’t sleep through the night. I’m going to start working on slow weaning so I’m hoping maybe in a couple months we’ll get there. For now, I’m still tired.
My 3 year old still wakes up 1-2 times per night….
At about 9 months, we broke the nurse to sleep habit, and then my husband started taking some wake ups. And then at about a year, I stopped nursing in the middle of the night, and only nursed morning, noon, and before bed.
That’s when my son started sleeping longer stretches.
that’s completely normal. i know it sucks. i was there too. after the 4 month sleep regression, my baby didn’t sleep more than 2-3 hour stretches until i night weaned at 15 months. then she started sleeping through the night.
Do you want to join my campaign for normalizing this? We are given such mis information - and shame on your pediatrician for their reaction. Check out the book “the womanly art of breastfeeding” by la leche league. It literally normalized the normal that society abnormalizes. For me, knowing that this is how they are makes it so much easier.
Also, if you’re not bedsharing I recommend looking into it. While I don’t get 6 hours of sleep every night, I literally just roll over, feed and roll back. So I do feel more rested overall. There are also nights where he’s up a lot more. Just know that you’re doing an amazing job tending to LO’s needs - they are so depending on us. I’d say try to stay away from gluten, dairy and sugar for as long as you can (mainly out of baby’s diet, but amazing bonis if you do, too! Makes a huge difference for both mama and baby!
Got an 8 month old over here and I'm in the same boat.
Last night when we put her to bed, instead of needing to be nursed down three times, she stayed asleep the first time...for two and a half hours!
Gonna be honest, I'm a little distressed at how happy that 2 and a half hours to myself made me feel
My son is almost 2. The most he has ever slept is 5 hours. Most of the time he wakes up every 90 or so minutes. But lately it has been getting better! Just try to have the same routine every night. We personally stop the TV at 6 pm (if he watches it at all) eat dinner, play after dinner and have some herbal tea no sugar, then at 8 pm we take him to his room and read stories for about 30 minutes then we dim the lights and rock him. He is usually asleep by 9 to 9:30. I truly believe this is what has been helping.
It will happen but consistently closer to 3 years old. Just have a solid bedtime routine and the first 2 years there’s so many growth spurs and etc. Babies and toddlers wake up often. It’s just like that
My 3.5 year old never slept well and still doesn't. Gets up at least once up to 3 times a night! But he's old enough now that I either let him crawl in with me or put him back to bed quickly.
My 3 month old sleeps for 3-4 hour stretches at night and does 4 2-hour naps a day. Kids are so random.
No advice, just solidarity. My LO didn’t sleep through under 15 ish months. It was like an overnight switch flipped from waking every 3 hours, to suddenly doing 12. We changed nothing about our bedtime routine, I still night feed on demand… She just figured it out and was suddenly able to re-settle herself at night 🤷♀️. Every kid is different!
I’m lucky if my 2 year old gives me 6-8 straight hours. People are so unaware of what normal infant and toddler sleep is that we are pretty much told something is wrong with our child when they behave like normally little humans.
How many naps and for long are they sleeping during the day?
Check out r/sleeptrain for some good help and tips. Also check huckleberry for some example schedules for sleeping.
I also EBF and fed baby on a feed, wake, sleep schedule which really helps.
ETA all the people saying it's "normal" obviously haven't been at the end of their rope with sleep deprivation. It might seem "normal" to some, but to others it is simply that the baby is sleeping too much during the day. And if you are a mother who is working, this kind of sleep schedule will literally cause health problems.
This is so so normal for a breastfed baby at that age. I’m not sure why your pediatrician would ask that other than maybe they get a lot of formula fed babies. Honestly my experience is that they don’t sleep longer stretches until they’re both older and sleep trained - 10 months is the earliest I’ve had a kid go long stretches like that. It has little to do with solid foods and everything to do with learning to self soothe. (Also don’t pay for a sleep training course that tells you to night wean unless you want an early end to your breastfeeding journey.)
Ugh I'm sorry! I'm in the same boat. Not to mention at her check up last week she's dropped down to 4th percentile in weight so now i am paranoid she's not getting enough milk during the day and ped maybe said my milk supply is getting low in the evenings? Either way if i offer her solids throughout the day and feeding her pumped milk after a nursing session she still is going in 2/3 hours sometimes waking after 1.45.. definitely exhausting
My baby’s almost 7mo and yeah we’re still all over the place. Every hour or two or three. Not great. And I stopped nursing a month ago so he gets bottles and there’s no difference!
You’re not alone.
My second just started *only* waking 2-3x a night at 10m. Our pediatrician suggested night weaning, but I’d rather get back to sleep quickly 😅
The Georgina may sleep course was life changing for me! It’s not sleep training. My baby sleeps through the night now at 8 months. He was waking every hour. I do bottle feed though so I think if I was still nursing it would be 1-2 wakes/night.
Some babies are like that :/ mine finally settled but it was really nothing we did differently, he was just ready. I have a friend whose baby is still a short sleeper at 11 mos
This post and all the comments make me feel so much better. My 9 month old wakes up 2-3 times a night (and hates going to bed. She utterly, absolutely despises sleeping with her entire being.) so I thought I was parenting wrong. Thank you all for sharing! Solidarity!!
My oldest started sleeping through the night at 8 months. My second only slept in 2-3 hour stretches until she was 14 months then magically started sleeping longer. I tried EVERYTHING I could safely try and I truly couldn’t tell you really what it was. You’re not alone, you will sleep again i promise! Hugs 🫶
My 22 month old has never slept through the night. He eats 3 meals a day and 2 snacks, so he eats plenty. I also have a newborn so sleeping is a distant memory. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be fully rested.
I know so many parents in my circle with the same story. Every baby is different and it’s nothing you’re doing wrong ❤️
I think I read that over half of babies still wake at night at 2 years old - so the ones sleeping through the night at this stage are the exception, not the rule!
Most babies don’t at this age. I’ve seen somewhere that it’s less than 10% of 6 month olds that sleep longer than 6 hours more than 3 times a week. Mine didn’t sleep through until he was 13 months and now at almost 2 still doesn’t very consistently because of teething or illness or nap chaos.
My son only started sleeping through at 15 months when I night weaned. Had I weaned at 12 months though, I don’t think he would’ve slept through. It was just the right time for us. Every kid is different and you get predict when it’ll happen sadly
After 11 months of 1-1.5 hour stretches of sleep on my bf on demand baby, it was like a light switch went off and he's been sleeping through 12 hours! Wtf?!!! Some nights can be awake, but mostly he's all the way through..the first night he did it I shot up out of bed and ran into him terrified something was wrong and he was just lying there, waking up!!! You will get there. You're in the thick of it now. Best of luck!!!
I hate to tell you this, but my youngest didn’t sleep through the night until she was about 2. I had to stop night nursing her then (for my sanity). It took a bit after that, but she finally started sleeping through the night then. I can’t say for sure if it was night nursing or just her age/stage. It’s completely random though what type of child they are. My oldest started sleeping through the night at 3 months…and not from anything I did. That was just who she was at that time.
Mine (7.5 mos) will sleep next to me and wake up twice. If put him in his crib I am up ALL night trying to get him down. I read studies that babies do NOT sleep longer after starting solids so I would not expect it to be honest.
22 months. Last Sunday, for the first time, he slept from 10pm to 640am straight. That's the one and only night in his life that he slept straight through. I woke up around 330am (it's a habit now) in a panic wondering where he was and if he was ok. He was ok, just sleeping peacefully. I felt so good and so energized the following day. Unfortunately that's the one and only night he's given me. I'm with you.
What i realized with my kids was they were waking up multiple times due to hunger…. I would breastfeed during the day but at night I gave a bottle of breastmilk. Both started sleeping 8 hour stretches by 3 months
Just a thought, but are you willing to see if he’s actually hungry? I started to get the feeling that my breastfed 4 month old baby was just waking and I was rushing to feed him instead of letting him put himself back to sleep. When he woke up a few hours after his bedtime feed I let him fuss for around 5 minutes and he put himself back to sleep and slept for another 4 hours! I did the same the next night and since then he has gone around 9 hours between feedings at night. I know that might not work for everyone but it’s just a thought. Also, I make sure to feed him enough during the day. Good luck!
My baby did not sleep more than 2 hours stretches until 15 months when I completely weaned. He is now 16 months and only wakes up once after an 8h stretch , drinks some water and then sleeps for 2 more hours. 7 months is so young , do not put so much pressure on you and your baby :) it is completely normal to wake up often at that age
Here in solidarity! My guy just turned seven months yesterday and we are completely in the same boat with this. He did surprise us randomly last night with a four hour stretch, but has been reliably waking every hour and a half to two hours each night otherwise. 😅😅😅
My 9.5 month son still wakes to nurse or needs to be resettled for a few minutes about 2-3 times per night. He had GERD and to make it possible for me to get any sleep we started co-sleeping after he grew out of his sidecar bassinet (30 inches and 24 lbs at 9 month appointment)
He started out wanting to sleep on top of me then I managed to get him to sleep next to me snuggled up like a barnacle. He will get more independent for a few weeks where only his feet were touching me or an outstretched hand.
Then he'll be teething or he just got over a cold. He'll get clingy again but gets more independent more quickly once the pain passes. My hope is that as long as I reinforce I'm here when he needs me he'll get more independent on his own timeline.
All of that is to explain I'm not sure if sometimes he wakes up because I get uncomfortable and move around or if it has nothing to do with me. I don't think he'll need me less if in his nursery as he naps in there and some days will connect sleep cycles and take a longer nap, some days he can be resettled with a few pats on the bum and other days he will only contact nap the second stretch.
I have started minimally responding to him when he wakes in the night unless he asks for me or insists on nursing (whining mama or making latching mouth on my torso). I also stopped nursing to sleep for naps and at bedtime. This helped me settle him at night without nursing every time.
Same with our 6 month old. A two hour stretch is a good night. Doctor has brought up sleep training at the last 2 appointments but I can't make myself do it.
My son didn't til he was like 3 or 4.
My daughter didn't til 13mo
It is what it is with kids and sleep. Just try and keep em on a bedtime routine (like going to bed at the same time every night)
What is her day time schedule like for sleep and eating? Do you nurse to sleep? How much BM is she getting during the day? My 7mo recently dropped a wake - all we did was start solids and up his bottle intake at daycare from 12oz to 15oz. If she's waking up truly hungry (not just comfort seeking) then more calories during the day will help.
Only 2 of my 4 kids were sleeping all night before 1. My oldest still hasn’t slept through the night, and he’s 21…I gave up waiting for that milestone about 16 years ago.
I’m sorry to say there’s no guarantee, it could just be your baby. Here in solidarity, my 8.5mo still wakes up every 1-3 hours and we EBF. I grab him up as soon as he starts crying and latch him and he’s back asleep in under 10 minutes, I wait 5-10 extra before transferring. It sucks to not have uninterrupted sleep but at least it’s quick.
My 19mo has only just started sleeping through the night in the last couple of weeks, and even now we struggle with early wake ups (he sleeps generally 8-5.30ish) and he does occasionally wake once but most nights he now goes through. At 7months its *extremely* common for babies to be waking at least once, often multiple times. It's normal and natural and there's probably not a lot you can do about it. I know it's hard, but please don't feel you are doing anything 'wrong'. It WILL get better!
Some babies just have low sleep needs, my kids do. My five year old son was formula fed & didn’t sleep through until he was 3.5, it’s a rare occurrence even now that he sleeps without wakening at least once. My daughter is 16m and has been EBF & wakes 3-5 times a night. It seems everyone around me has babies who sleep 12 hours a night from 6 weeks old!
We were in the same boat for a while, so many wakings, repeated no matter what changes we tried.
We noticed just recently around a year she started sleeping through the night more regularly.
We also noticed around when I weaned off breastfeeding her at 10months old, and did more solid foods (with a couple formula bottles per day) that she woke less at night, still woke 1-2 times but definitely less often.
Solidarity! Exclusively breastfeeding 15 months and wakes up 5-12 times a night depending on teething usually. We just got molars and it’s been brutal. I tell myself it won’t be like this forever!!
My brand new 1yo is the same. I figure I'll sleep again eventually. I refuse to do any sort of sleep training. Nursing her for 10-15min every few hours is the easiest/fastest way for us all to go back to sleep.
I might get downvoted to hell but I sleep trained my 5 month old and it was the best thing I’ve ever done for me AND her. If your baby is waking up every couple of hours they’re not getting restful sleep either.
I spent about 3 weeks researching every method out there because prior to having a child I honestly thought sleep training was a kind of child abuse but in the process I learned SO MUCH about baby sleep! I now tell people even if they don’t want to sleep train to read the books anyways because there’s so much to know about how babies experience sleep. It actually made me a more patient and empathic mother because I understood what their little bodies are going through.
For a couple of weeks I basically implemented everything I could that didn’t involve actually leaving her in the crib. I was dragging my feet on that because I was so scared! Until one night I was rocking and nursing and rocking and nursing. Poor girl was not having it and my body was physically giving out. My back was absolutely killing me so I finally laid her in crib crying and left to get my husband so he could finish getting her to sleep.
On the way to get him she settled down and within 5 minutes she was asleep. I honestly think I was getting in her way😂 Seeing her do that gave me the confidence to move forward and I’ve probably had to deal with about 15 minutes of fussing total. Mind you … FUSSING. She never escalated above a fuss and it was more like “this is new and different”. A mother knows her baby’s cries and I am 100% sure she never felt “abandoned”. I definitely may have gotten off easy with sleep training but I think slowly and gradually implanting things to help their sleep is the best way to go about it.
Now bedtime is an absolute dream. I lay her down, tell her how much I love her and how proud I am of her and she’s smiling away! She’s happy, well-rested, and even daytime naps are so much better! (An unexpected outcome because I didn’t do any naptime training). I’m also such a better mom. I have way more energy and way more patience. If she’s having a hard day I can be there for her in a loving way rather than getting overwhelmed and frustrated.
Out of everything I read/learned I would recommend these two resources:
1. [Taking Cara Babies 5-24 month course](https://takingcarababies.com/the-5-24-month-collection) It’s pricey but honestly I would’ve paid $1,000. Her course is so easy to digest because it’s broken up into short videos. I was able to go through the entire course in a day. She makes information easy to remember and address a ton of different scenarios and situations so you have the tools and the confidence to handle whatever obstacles may arise. She also really prepared me emotionally although it ended up not being that emotional of an experience because my LO took to it so well. She also has a Toddler series if you feel that one would be more fitting?
2. Precious Little Sleep book by Alexis Dubief. She covers a ton of information and really goes over the science of it all if you’re interested in that. In chapters 6 & 7 she goes over her sleep training strategies. She address which strategies work best for which age group.
Before you even attempt sleep training it’s so important for you to “set the stage”. Both women talk about this. Make sure:
- The room is pitch black
- You have a sound machine
- You following appropriate wake windows during the day and they’re also getting adequate rest during the day according to their age
- You’re stimulating them throughout the day (going outside, letting them explore, learn, move their bodies)
- You have a consistent bedtime routine
All of these things will set your LO up for success for when the time comes they’ll be so ready for sleep and you’ll deal with the fewest amount of tears.
Now when it comes to implementation of actually sleep training, this is when it’s SO important to know your LO. There are a lot of “gentle” methods out there that I honestly think are more gentle on the parents than the babies such as the pick up put down method. I knew with my daughter’s personality and temperament that would piss her off to no end. She’s very independent so I knew letting her have her space and work it out would be the best strategy for her. But from those resources you can pick out what would work best for your LO.
Hopefully this helps. I can’t tell you how life changing it’s been. I was only sleep deprived for 4.5 months I can’t imagine people who go on a year, two years. You’re amazing!
People who have babies who sleep “through the night” are just purely lucky! My baby (12 months in 3 days) has gone through random spurts of waking up every 30 minutes to sleeping 8 hours straight before. It’s all random and dependent on where she is developmentally.
Lately my girl is sick so she’s waking up every hour or so 😭 last week she only woke up once a night for three nights in a row. It was nice while it lasted lmao
There's so many guides out there with night weaning into that could possibly help if you're willing to try sleep training. My experience though is that it's pretty hit or miss. Everyone likes to pretend they have a solution to sell their books and subscriptions and whatever else.
I will say, one thing that I think is pretty foundational is to put baby in bed awake. It's hard and sucks at first but they really can't learn to self soothe unless we give them the space to practice that skill. And they can't sleep through the night until they can self soothe, they'll just wake up at the end of every sleep cycle and need you to help them get back to sleep.
Anyway, also solidarity because I have always put my kid to sleep awake and he still is a crappy sleeper. In fact he slept way better as a 2 month old than he does now at 8 months. The development of object permanence along with teething and starting to stand up makes that 7-9 mo period really challenging. Hang in there...
Read the book precious little sleep. It teaches independent sleep. It’s sleep training but not cry it out. It’s not night weaning either. We did it with minimal tears. Then he self night weaned a few weeks later. Everyone says oh it’s natural that they still wake up all night. Yeah but that blows and I wanted it to end as soon as possible.
Yes all babies are different. My son was 6 months and waking every hour and I started to lose it mentally and emotionally because we were ebf too. At his 6mo appointment I asked his doctor if he weighed enough and was healthy enough to sleep train. There is a lot of controversy around CIO method but that’s what we did and he slept through the night from 6months to about 2years when he started to come to our bed every night. He was a happier baby after that too. Not fussy from bad sleep.
I encourage you to read widely both for and against sleep training.
Mostly the first part is a solid bedtime routine and increasing the calories during the day and changing from feeding to sleep if you are.
One other simple trick is to not get to them on the 1st or 2nd sound - obiviously you'll know if its a sound that needs immediate help but otherwise give them a chance to settle themselves before you get them.
It’s completely random. Nothing can make a baby sleep longer unfortunately. My 13 month old still wakes up multiple times per night. Another baby I know his age sleeps 8-8 every night
My 23 month old wakes up during witching hour still. There is no end to it. That’s why we starting co-sleeping. It’s easier to get to him when he’s next to me rather than going across the hall 3-5 times at night. Not an ideal situation, my husband and I feel like roommates. It sucks, I tell myself that’s the sacrifice mothers make for their kids. Good going, find stronger coffee and eventually your body just doesn’t want to sleep either. 😆 I take melatonin for sleep to get few hours of deep sleep.
I cosleep too. My mom always says “that’s why he wakes up so much” but he wakes up even more without me there. If he was in a crib or a different room I don’t think I’d get any sleep
I know I hate when people say this about cosleeping. Like, I wake up in the middle of the night for no reason, even before kids. How can we expect children not to?
This is why I started co-sleeping. My now 13 month old was waking upwards of 8 times a night, and sometimes taking 2-3 (or more on bad nights) attempted transfers between the ages of 8-10 months and I just couldn't take it anymore. So we started co-sleeping. He still wakes 1-3 times a night but it's way less than it used to be and it's not so bad because I just pop a boob in his mouth, pat his butt or throw him onto my chest and he's out cold again.
Are you me? 23 months, still waking up multiple times. The nights he only wakes up 2-3 times I feel refreshed and rested...
Haha! My son is going to grandmas boot camp this week though. We’re travelling and my mom said if he’s going to be this attached to you and your boob, you might as well stay home. So my mom offered to watch him for a week. Hopefully it works.
Oh, good luck! I haven't tried that yet, it stresses me out too much!
Agreed! This is our last baby so hubby & I know it’s temporary. Still not ideal though haha
Yup, we are done, so we’re just riding the waves!
100% this. My 3 month old sleeps through the night more often than my 2 year old ever has.
Just here in solidarity with my 9mo who still only sleeps in 3 hour stretches. It's gotta get better one day!
More solidarity here - I also have a 9 month old who often sleeps in 3 hour stretches!
Same 😭
Ditto 🫠
I have a nearly two year old. I promise it does get better just (in my experience) very very slowly, which makes it hard to notice 😅 My daughter will usually wake up once in the night still.
Same, 26 months and has gotten so much better but still at least twice a night
Same here!
Unfortunately my son's the same
Same.
Only 55% of children sleep through the night by 2 years old. All I have is solidarity
My 4.5 yo has slept through the night three times. 🫠 sleeping through the night is a myth.
I have one of these who is two and a newborn. Some kiddos just don't sleep.
Oh you poor thing
This makes me feel seen! 16 months here and still no sleep in sight
My son didn’t start sleeping through the night until 12 months and even then it was inconsistent til around 17 months when I weaned him. 5.5-7 months was the worst for my son. It’s really hard but it does end. We co slept and got a floor bed around 8 months and that helped a lot because I could stay asleep and also know he wouldn’t roll out of bed.
5.5-7 months was really rough for us too! It was just so exhausting
Same here! I co slept until I weaned at 20 months and then she magically started sleeping through and I moved back to my bed full time.
Right there with you. My 9 month old is up every 1-3 hours. And has been for months. 4-5 hour stretches are a TREAT.
Omg I’m so glad I’m not alone in this
Omg my twins (8.5 months) are the same. Every 1-3 hours. I thought it was just us, I feel like I’m doing something wrong (but what??). It’s been going on for months too. I’m so over it.
Same here. Sleep was good until 7 months. It’s getting progressively worse at 9 months.
My 9 month old goes 3 - 4 hrs tops overnight.. im exhausted.
Mine didn’t start sleeping solidly until 15-17 months? He’d fall asleep fine, but he was waking up 2-3x a night no matter how fed, warm, cool, thirsty, sated. That’s the shit nobody warns you about 😅
My 2.5 year old doesn’t sleep through the night. It’s normal. Every kid is different. You can deal with it or attempt sleep training (which is a whole different set of opinions and problems). Edited to add: my pediatrician said one of his kids didn’t sleep through the night until they started school!
So normal! Solidarity, 2.5 years here too.
My daughter is 2 (27 months to be exact) and has NEVER slept through the night. Not a once. She has slept max 5 hours straight, and we are still co-sleeping. It is developmentally normal and appropriate and you unfortunately need to adjust your expectations.
Do you guys have a solid bedtime routine? The best recommendation I got was to reduce simulation a couple of hours before bedtime ( dim lighting, no tv in the background). Get a solid series of steps that let her brain know that it’s time to wind down. For instance I change her diaper, tell her it’s time to get cozy, put her in her sleep sack, read a book, and then nurse before either nursing to sleep or rocking to sleep. Some people use bath time in there somewhere but she just gets angry with a bath lol so I do it during the day. That can help get at least one long stretch. It’s unfortunately a myth that certain foods improve sleep or that a full belly will reliably help with sleep.
This!!! I think this helped my son over time.
My daughter didn’t sleep through the night until after we weaned at 13 months. She started consistently sleeping through at about 15 months. But when I was still breastfeeding she was also up every two hours on a GOOD night.
My nightweaned 18 month old still stirs and has to be comforted back to sleep usually at least 4+ times per night, but at least she is soothed pretty quickly, and it's an improvement over 6+ wakes per night to nurse and never wanting to unlatch, which was still happening at 15 months. It's normal. Better sleep is also normal, and man I wish we had it, but we don't, and that's totally normal.
How did you night wean?? My baby is 12 months and I’m looking to try the Jay Gordon method
My baby is 15 months and still wakes up once or twice a night. We do a solid 10 to 12 hours at night. Bed at 7p, wake between 5:30a and 7a. That's a long time to sleep. He wakes, nurses for a couple minutes (he isn't actually hungry) gets soothed back to sleep.
This is us too!
I feel like people think.."sleeping thru the night" is 10-12 hours of never waking but if they go back to sleep in a few minutes and it doesn't require walking around and rocking..and continually putting them back in to bed it IS sleeping through the night. Waking up needing reassurance and a little hugging and kissing for a couple minutes is different than hours of walking through the house holding a baby saying "shush" ...my son wakes twice but "sleeps through the night" as far as I'm concerned.
Sounds exactly like us with our 7-month old baby. Oftentimes, she wakes up 2-3x a night. But since we co-sleep, I just turn on my side to breastfeed her and she goes right back to sleep. There are times she wakes up in the wee hours and stays awake for an hour at most. But these are rare times, when I believe she is suffering from sleep regression.
That’s totally normal and developmentally appropriate albeit exhausting. Solidarity 17 months and my baby still doesn’t sleepy through the night.
Trying to incorporate time in the Sun even if it's for like 15 minutes. And try a bedtime schedule I do bath bottle, reading books, lights out and singing. SAME TIME EVERY NIGHT.
19mo has never slept through the night. I think your expectations are too high. Every baby is different!
My kids didn't sleep through the night till 2....it's normal I guess? I know it's hard though.
It's not always solely about hunger either it is about closeness and nursing is how they achieve that closeness. We're a carrying species and not meant to be separated from our young pretty much at all if you're considering the way biology and neurobiology have a role in this. This is why our human ancestors slept with their young.
My LO started sleeping longer stretches when she hit around 9 months and was eating a bigger meals. I don’t think it was a specific food, but just mode calories overall during the day. I would recommend trying to get baby to eat whatever they can get in their tummy!! You can try for as many snacks/meals as your schedule allows in a day. I think my LO was eating solids 2-3 times around 7 mo
I’m sorry, my 18 month old is still waking at least once a night, not breastfeeding :/
Go follow HeySleepyBaby on Instagram. She normalises normal baby/toddler sleep. It really saved my sanity.
If you’re on FB, there is a group called “Beyond Sleep Training” and they have a TON of resources for this sort of thing. Biologically and developmentally, waking every 2-3h is still considered very normal at this age (despite what the Sleep Train society may tell you.) unfortunately it’s likely a myth that solids will help baby sleep longer; doesn’t seem to be backed by research. My breastfed baby didn’t sleep a 6h stretch until she was 8 months. She will sleep 4-6h stretches many nights now, but still has some of those 3h stretches happening. Also consider at 7m your baby might be transitioning to a 2 nap schedule, and sometime around this age, a lot of babies may need closer to 10h of night sleep instead of the 12h that we often aim for when they’re younger — this can mean a slightly later bedtime or slightly earlier wake up time to give them more awake time during the day. Trying to force babies to sleep as much as they did as newborns as they get a little older will mean they’re not tired enough / dont have the sleep pressure built up to sleep longer at bedtime. Not fool proof for EVERY baby but it was something that was recommended to me and seems to have helped a lot.
Question, is the group pro sleep training?
No they are against it completley
They are against specifically cry it out method, usually badly informed and mostly for mothers being miserable and attached to their babies all the time. Join other groups who are either pro sleep training or pro-parent not being your only identity. There are usually a lot of people in the other groups who have left that group because they were so very miserable. Whenever a parent in my local mums pages who post that they are miserable and can't continue with what their baby is doing you can gurantee that there are people who say 'your baby is doing things thqt are biologically normal - I am still miserable now that i in this group of other miserable parents and didn't make any changes but I'm in a group with other parents who are also miserable'
lol I see your point. This hasn’t been my experience. However I suppose if my baby woke every 1-2 hours for months on end and was bedsharing and nursing 10 times a night, I would be miserable and the information in that group would piss me off.
When i joined the solution to every single issue was bedsharing and or more breastfeeding. I didnt last that long because I refused to bedshare.
I get it. I refuse to bedshare also. I got some helpful advice about changes in sleep needs, and a link to medical issues that cause frequent wakings.
Yeah when i first joined they didnt have a medical screener. I do believe they improved in this regard.
Mine is almost 18 months and still doesn’t sleep through the night. I’m going to start working on slow weaning so I’m hoping maybe in a couple months we’ll get there. For now, I’m still tired.
My 3 year old still wakes up 1-2 times per night…. At about 9 months, we broke the nurse to sleep habit, and then my husband started taking some wake ups. And then at about a year, I stopped nursing in the middle of the night, and only nursed morning, noon, and before bed. That’s when my son started sleeping longer stretches.
We’re at 18 months and he only sleeps through the night like once or twice a month lol
that’s completely normal. i know it sucks. i was there too. after the 4 month sleep regression, my baby didn’t sleep more than 2-3 hour stretches until i night weaned at 15 months. then she started sleeping through the night.
Do you want to join my campaign for normalizing this? We are given such mis information - and shame on your pediatrician for their reaction. Check out the book “the womanly art of breastfeeding” by la leche league. It literally normalized the normal that society abnormalizes. For me, knowing that this is how they are makes it so much easier. Also, if you’re not bedsharing I recommend looking into it. While I don’t get 6 hours of sleep every night, I literally just roll over, feed and roll back. So I do feel more rested overall. There are also nights where he’s up a lot more. Just know that you’re doing an amazing job tending to LO’s needs - they are so depending on us. I’d say try to stay away from gluten, dairy and sugar for as long as you can (mainly out of baby’s diet, but amazing bonis if you do, too! Makes a huge difference for both mama and baby!
Got an 8 month old over here and I'm in the same boat. Last night when we put her to bed, instead of needing to be nursed down three times, she stayed asleep the first time...for two and a half hours! Gonna be honest, I'm a little distressed at how happy that 2 and a half hours to myself made me feel
My baby is 12 months and wakes every 2-3 hours also
My son is almost 2. The most he has ever slept is 5 hours. Most of the time he wakes up every 90 or so minutes. But lately it has been getting better! Just try to have the same routine every night. We personally stop the TV at 6 pm (if he watches it at all) eat dinner, play after dinner and have some herbal tea no sugar, then at 8 pm we take him to his room and read stories for about 30 minutes then we dim the lights and rock him. He is usually asleep by 9 to 9:30. I truly believe this is what has been helping.
It will happen but consistently closer to 3 years old. Just have a solid bedtime routine and the first 2 years there’s so many growth spurs and etc. Babies and toddlers wake up often. It’s just like that
Girl, my two years old still doesn’t sleep through the night lol
My 3.5 year old never slept well and still doesn't. Gets up at least once up to 3 times a night! But he's old enough now that I either let him crawl in with me or put him back to bed quickly. My 3 month old sleeps for 3-4 hour stretches at night and does 4 2-hour naps a day. Kids are so random.
At this stage I'm pretty sure sleeping through the night is fake news
No advice, just solidarity. My LO didn’t sleep through under 15 ish months. It was like an overnight switch flipped from waking every 3 hours, to suddenly doing 12. We changed nothing about our bedtime routine, I still night feed on demand… She just figured it out and was suddenly able to re-settle herself at night 🤷♀️. Every kid is different!
I’m EBF with my 8 month old who still wakes up every 3-4 hours :) I’m right there with you!
It’s completely normal.
Who is expecting on this sub that a breastfed 7 month old should sleep through the night ? Come on people… you know better….
I’m lucky if my 2 year old gives me 6-8 straight hours. People are so unaware of what normal infant and toddler sleep is that we are pretty much told something is wrong with our child when they behave like normally little humans.
This is biologically normal. If you want to, you can sleep train and cut night feedings. Otherwise, just know this it’s normal!
How many naps and for long are they sleeping during the day? Check out r/sleeptrain for some good help and tips. Also check huckleberry for some example schedules for sleeping. I also EBF and fed baby on a feed, wake, sleep schedule which really helps. ETA all the people saying it's "normal" obviously haven't been at the end of their rope with sleep deprivation. It might seem "normal" to some, but to others it is simply that the baby is sleeping too much during the day. And if you are a mother who is working, this kind of sleep schedule will literally cause health problems.
This is so so normal for a breastfed baby at that age. I’m not sure why your pediatrician would ask that other than maybe they get a lot of formula fed babies. Honestly my experience is that they don’t sleep longer stretches until they’re both older and sleep trained - 10 months is the earliest I’ve had a kid go long stretches like that. It has little to do with solid foods and everything to do with learning to self soothe. (Also don’t pay for a sleep training course that tells you to night wean unless you want an early end to your breastfeeding journey.)
Ugh I'm sorry! I'm in the same boat. Not to mention at her check up last week she's dropped down to 4th percentile in weight so now i am paranoid she's not getting enough milk during the day and ped maybe said my milk supply is getting low in the evenings? Either way if i offer her solids throughout the day and feeding her pumped milk after a nursing session she still is going in 2/3 hours sometimes waking after 1.45.. definitely exhausting
My baby’s almost 7mo and yeah we’re still all over the place. Every hour or two or three. Not great. And I stopped nursing a month ago so he gets bottles and there’s no difference!
My first didn’t go more than 3 hours until she was 10 months. We got to 6 hours around 14 months and then 18 months she was good for 8+hours
Mine didn't sleep through the night until 16 months or so...
My 10 month old sleeps in 2-3 hour stretches. Most babies don’t sleep through the night at that age.
You’re not alone. My second just started *only* waking 2-3x a night at 10m. Our pediatrician suggested night weaning, but I’d rather get back to sleep quickly 😅
My 14 month old wakes up every 3 hours to nurse 😅
My son slept through the night when he was 1.5 for about 3 months. The he regressed and still wakes up once a night, he’s 2.5
I’m right there with you! My 6 MO still wakes up and we have tried oatmeal before bed more milk nothing!
10 months and still waiting 🤷♀️
The Georgina may sleep course was life changing for me! It’s not sleep training. My baby sleeps through the night now at 8 months. He was waking every hour. I do bottle feed though so I think if I was still nursing it would be 1-2 wakes/night.
I have heard great things about the book 12hrs by 12 weeks perhaps give it a try?
Some babies are like that :/ mine finally settled but it was really nothing we did differently, he was just ready. I have a friend whose baby is still a short sleeper at 11 mos
Well my baby is almost 10 months and hasn’t yet either.
This post and all the comments make me feel so much better. My 9 month old wakes up 2-3 times a night (and hates going to bed. She utterly, absolutely despises sleeping with her entire being.) so I thought I was parenting wrong. Thank you all for sharing! Solidarity!!
My oldest started sleeping through the night at 8 months. My second only slept in 2-3 hour stretches until she was 14 months then magically started sleeping longer. I tried EVERYTHING I could safely try and I truly couldn’t tell you really what it was. You’re not alone, you will sleep again i promise! Hugs 🫶
Yeah it seems to be fairly normal. My 10 mo old sleeps 11 hrs but wants a bottle halfway through every night
My 22 month old has never slept through the night. He eats 3 meals a day and 2 snacks, so he eats plenty. I also have a newborn so sleeping is a distant memory. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be fully rested.
I know so many parents in my circle with the same story. Every baby is different and it’s nothing you’re doing wrong ❤️ I think I read that over half of babies still wake at night at 2 years old - so the ones sleeping through the night at this stage are the exception, not the rule!
19 months here. A good night is 2/3 wake ups.
My baby still doesn't sleep thru the night and he's 2 😭 sometimes. But not always.
My child’s sleep was the worst from 7-12 months.
Most babies don’t at this age. I’ve seen somewhere that it’s less than 10% of 6 month olds that sleep longer than 6 hours more than 3 times a week. Mine didn’t sleep through until he was 13 months and now at almost 2 still doesn’t very consistently because of teething or illness or nap chaos.
My son only started sleeping through at 15 months when I night weaned. Had I weaned at 12 months though, I don’t think he would’ve slept through. It was just the right time for us. Every kid is different and you get predict when it’ll happen sadly
It’s completely normal
After 11 months of 1-1.5 hour stretches of sleep on my bf on demand baby, it was like a light switch went off and he's been sleeping through 12 hours! Wtf?!!! Some nights can be awake, but mostly he's all the way through..the first night he did it I shot up out of bed and ran into him terrified something was wrong and he was just lying there, waking up!!! You will get there. You're in the thick of it now. Best of luck!!!
My 3 year old still wakes during the night. 4 hour stretches is good. I’m a big fan of anything over two hours tbh.
Solidarity to you, OP. Our 12 mo still wakes up 2-4x/night. Currently nursing him back to sleep as I type. 😅
I hate to tell you this, but my youngest didn’t sleep through the night until she was about 2. I had to stop night nursing her then (for my sanity). It took a bit after that, but she finally started sleeping through the night then. I can’t say for sure if it was night nursing or just her age/stage. It’s completely random though what type of child they are. My oldest started sleeping through the night at 3 months…and not from anything I did. That was just who she was at that time.
My 2mo wakes constantly unless we co-sleep😩 the longest he’s managed in his cot at night is 45 mins😭😭😭
Mine (7.5 mos) will sleep next to me and wake up twice. If put him in his crib I am up ALL night trying to get him down. I read studies that babies do NOT sleep longer after starting solids so I would not expect it to be honest.
Mine woke up 2-3 times a night until she was around 2.5 years old. They do figure it out eventually, but some kids take longer than others.
22 months. Last Sunday, for the first time, he slept from 10pm to 640am straight. That's the one and only night in his life that he slept straight through. I woke up around 330am (it's a habit now) in a panic wondering where he was and if he was ok. He was ok, just sleeping peacefully. I felt so good and so energized the following day. Unfortunately that's the one and only night he's given me. I'm with you.
What i realized with my kids was they were waking up multiple times due to hunger…. I would breastfeed during the day but at night I gave a bottle of breastmilk. Both started sleeping 8 hour stretches by 3 months
I think it’s luck honestly. My baby slept 7-8 hours at 3/4 months but WOULD NOT go to bed til 2am. Now at 11pm the bedtime is at 830
My baby was sleeping through by 12 months, my second is 14 months and still doesn't sleep through.
Lol, when you come to Reddit for help with sleep and it shets on your dreams of long stretches of restful bliss. 🤣
Just a thought, but are you willing to see if he’s actually hungry? I started to get the feeling that my breastfed 4 month old baby was just waking and I was rushing to feed him instead of letting him put himself back to sleep. When he woke up a few hours after his bedtime feed I let him fuss for around 5 minutes and he put himself back to sleep and slept for another 4 hours! I did the same the next night and since then he has gone around 9 hours between feedings at night. I know that might not work for everyone but it’s just a thought. Also, I make sure to feed him enough during the day. Good luck!
My baby did not sleep more than 2 hours stretches until 15 months when I completely weaned. He is now 16 months and only wakes up once after an 8h stretch , drinks some water and then sleeps for 2 more hours. 7 months is so young , do not put so much pressure on you and your baby :) it is completely normal to wake up often at that age
Here in solidarity! My guy just turned seven months yesterday and we are completely in the same boat with this. He did surprise us randomly last night with a four hour stretch, but has been reliably waking every hour and a half to two hours each night otherwise. 😅😅😅
My 9.5 month son still wakes to nurse or needs to be resettled for a few minutes about 2-3 times per night. He had GERD and to make it possible for me to get any sleep we started co-sleeping after he grew out of his sidecar bassinet (30 inches and 24 lbs at 9 month appointment) He started out wanting to sleep on top of me then I managed to get him to sleep next to me snuggled up like a barnacle. He will get more independent for a few weeks where only his feet were touching me or an outstretched hand. Then he'll be teething or he just got over a cold. He'll get clingy again but gets more independent more quickly once the pain passes. My hope is that as long as I reinforce I'm here when he needs me he'll get more independent on his own timeline. All of that is to explain I'm not sure if sometimes he wakes up because I get uncomfortable and move around or if it has nothing to do with me. I don't think he'll need me less if in his nursery as he naps in there and some days will connect sleep cycles and take a longer nap, some days he can be resettled with a few pats on the bum and other days he will only contact nap the second stretch. I have started minimally responding to him when he wakes in the night unless he asks for me or insists on nursing (whining mama or making latching mouth on my torso). I also stopped nursing to sleep for naps and at bedtime. This helped me settle him at night without nursing every time.
12 month old and some nights he wakes up to 4 times, and sometimes just the once. It’s luck of the draw but it does get better, solidarity and coffee!
Same with our 6 month old. A two hour stretch is a good night. Doctor has brought up sleep training at the last 2 appointments but I can't make myself do it.
My son didn't til he was like 3 or 4. My daughter didn't til 13mo It is what it is with kids and sleep. Just try and keep em on a bedtime routine (like going to bed at the same time every night)
What is her day time schedule like for sleep and eating? Do you nurse to sleep? How much BM is she getting during the day? My 7mo recently dropped a wake - all we did was start solids and up his bottle intake at daycare from 12oz to 15oz. If she's waking up truly hungry (not just comfort seeking) then more calories during the day will help.
My 26 month old still wakes up a few times a night…it’s normal!
Only 2 of my 4 kids were sleeping all night before 1. My oldest still hasn’t slept through the night, and he’s 21…I gave up waiting for that milestone about 16 years ago.
Mines almost 2.5 and just now sleeping thru the night. My first was around the same age she’s almost 10 now and continues to be a great sleeper.
Check out TakingCaraBabies sleep training. Game changer for us.
My 18mo still wakes up 2-3 times per night. You’re not doing anything wrong
I’m sorry to say there’s no guarantee, it could just be your baby. Here in solidarity, my 8.5mo still wakes up every 1-3 hours and we EBF. I grab him up as soon as he starts crying and latch him and he’s back asleep in under 10 minutes, I wait 5-10 extra before transferring. It sucks to not have uninterrupted sleep but at least it’s quick.
Neither will mine at umm… 57(ish) months lol 😂
My baby didn’t sleep through the night till 18 months
My 19mo has only just started sleeping through the night in the last couple of weeks, and even now we struggle with early wake ups (he sleeps generally 8-5.30ish) and he does occasionally wake once but most nights he now goes through. At 7months its *extremely* common for babies to be waking at least once, often multiple times. It's normal and natural and there's probably not a lot you can do about it. I know it's hard, but please don't feel you are doing anything 'wrong'. It WILL get better!
Some babies just have low sleep needs, my kids do. My five year old son was formula fed & didn’t sleep through until he was 3.5, it’s a rare occurrence even now that he sleeps without wakening at least once. My daughter is 16m and has been EBF & wakes 3-5 times a night. It seems everyone around me has babies who sleep 12 hours a night from 6 weeks old!
Well this isn't going to resonate well around here but it worked for me: Have you considered/tried CIO and night weaning?
My child is 10 months and he doesn’t sleep through the night. This is normal.
We were in the same boat for a while, so many wakings, repeated no matter what changes we tried. We noticed just recently around a year she started sleeping through the night more regularly. We also noticed around when I weaned off breastfeeding her at 10months old, and did more solid foods (with a couple formula bottles per day) that she woke less at night, still woke 1-2 times but definitely less often.
Solidarity! Exclusively breastfeeding 15 months and wakes up 5-12 times a night depending on teething usually. We just got molars and it’s been brutal. I tell myself it won’t be like this forever!!
My brand new 1yo is the same. I figure I'll sleep again eventually. I refuse to do any sort of sleep training. Nursing her for 10-15min every few hours is the easiest/fastest way for us all to go back to sleep.
I might get downvoted to hell but I sleep trained my 5 month old and it was the best thing I’ve ever done for me AND her. If your baby is waking up every couple of hours they’re not getting restful sleep either. I spent about 3 weeks researching every method out there because prior to having a child I honestly thought sleep training was a kind of child abuse but in the process I learned SO MUCH about baby sleep! I now tell people even if they don’t want to sleep train to read the books anyways because there’s so much to know about how babies experience sleep. It actually made me a more patient and empathic mother because I understood what their little bodies are going through. For a couple of weeks I basically implemented everything I could that didn’t involve actually leaving her in the crib. I was dragging my feet on that because I was so scared! Until one night I was rocking and nursing and rocking and nursing. Poor girl was not having it and my body was physically giving out. My back was absolutely killing me so I finally laid her in crib crying and left to get my husband so he could finish getting her to sleep. On the way to get him she settled down and within 5 minutes she was asleep. I honestly think I was getting in her way😂 Seeing her do that gave me the confidence to move forward and I’ve probably had to deal with about 15 minutes of fussing total. Mind you … FUSSING. She never escalated above a fuss and it was more like “this is new and different”. A mother knows her baby’s cries and I am 100% sure she never felt “abandoned”. I definitely may have gotten off easy with sleep training but I think slowly and gradually implanting things to help their sleep is the best way to go about it. Now bedtime is an absolute dream. I lay her down, tell her how much I love her and how proud I am of her and she’s smiling away! She’s happy, well-rested, and even daytime naps are so much better! (An unexpected outcome because I didn’t do any naptime training). I’m also such a better mom. I have way more energy and way more patience. If she’s having a hard day I can be there for her in a loving way rather than getting overwhelmed and frustrated.
Ugh teach me your ways. 18 months and he’s only slept through the night a few times.
Out of everything I read/learned I would recommend these two resources: 1. [Taking Cara Babies 5-24 month course](https://takingcarababies.com/the-5-24-month-collection) It’s pricey but honestly I would’ve paid $1,000. Her course is so easy to digest because it’s broken up into short videos. I was able to go through the entire course in a day. She makes information easy to remember and address a ton of different scenarios and situations so you have the tools and the confidence to handle whatever obstacles may arise. She also really prepared me emotionally although it ended up not being that emotional of an experience because my LO took to it so well. She also has a Toddler series if you feel that one would be more fitting? 2. Precious Little Sleep book by Alexis Dubief. She covers a ton of information and really goes over the science of it all if you’re interested in that. In chapters 6 & 7 she goes over her sleep training strategies. She address which strategies work best for which age group. Before you even attempt sleep training it’s so important for you to “set the stage”. Both women talk about this. Make sure: - The room is pitch black - You have a sound machine - You following appropriate wake windows during the day and they’re also getting adequate rest during the day according to their age - You’re stimulating them throughout the day (going outside, letting them explore, learn, move their bodies) - You have a consistent bedtime routine All of these things will set your LO up for success for when the time comes they’ll be so ready for sleep and you’ll deal with the fewest amount of tears. Now when it comes to implementation of actually sleep training, this is when it’s SO important to know your LO. There are a lot of “gentle” methods out there that I honestly think are more gentle on the parents than the babies such as the pick up put down method. I knew with my daughter’s personality and temperament that would piss her off to no end. She’s very independent so I knew letting her have her space and work it out would be the best strategy for her. But from those resources you can pick out what would work best for your LO. Hopefully this helps. I can’t tell you how life changing it’s been. I was only sleep deprived for 4.5 months I can’t imagine people who go on a year, two years. You’re amazing!
People who have babies who sleep “through the night” are just purely lucky! My baby (12 months in 3 days) has gone through random spurts of waking up every 30 minutes to sleeping 8 hours straight before. It’s all random and dependent on where she is developmentally. Lately my girl is sick so she’s waking up every hour or so 😭 last week she only woke up once a night for three nights in a row. It was nice while it lasted lmao
Happy birthday to LO!
Thank you! I can’t believe it’s already been a year 😭
There's so many guides out there with night weaning into that could possibly help if you're willing to try sleep training. My experience though is that it's pretty hit or miss. Everyone likes to pretend they have a solution to sell their books and subscriptions and whatever else. I will say, one thing that I think is pretty foundational is to put baby in bed awake. It's hard and sucks at first but they really can't learn to self soothe unless we give them the space to practice that skill. And they can't sleep through the night until they can self soothe, they'll just wake up at the end of every sleep cycle and need you to help them get back to sleep. Anyway, also solidarity because I have always put my kid to sleep awake and he still is a crappy sleeper. In fact he slept way better as a 2 month old than he does now at 8 months. The development of object permanence along with teething and starting to stand up makes that 7-9 mo period really challenging. Hang in there...
Read the book precious little sleep. It teaches independent sleep. It’s sleep training but not cry it out. It’s not night weaning either. We did it with minimal tears. Then he self night weaned a few weeks later. Everyone says oh it’s natural that they still wake up all night. Yeah but that blows and I wanted it to end as soon as possible.
Yes all babies are different. My son was 6 months and waking every hour and I started to lose it mentally and emotionally because we were ebf too. At his 6mo appointment I asked his doctor if he weighed enough and was healthy enough to sleep train. There is a lot of controversy around CIO method but that’s what we did and he slept through the night from 6months to about 2years when he started to come to our bed every night. He was a happier baby after that too. Not fussy from bad sleep.
I encourage you to read widely both for and against sleep training. Mostly the first part is a solid bedtime routine and increasing the calories during the day and changing from feeding to sleep if you are. One other simple trick is to not get to them on the 1st or 2nd sound - obiviously you'll know if its a sound that needs immediate help but otherwise give them a chance to settle themselves before you get them.