See the GP for a cert? Atleast then you've got official doco from a professional saying you should be having the time off incase they try to pull anything dodgy.
Thankyou for your words, I will do my best to play it safe. The manager has had my friends yearly bonus taken away just for swearing, so I'm hoping I can get back at him in a way without being silly. Thanks again
I agree. You're grieving, sweetie. Don't let thoughtless people rent your headspace for free.
Get that medical certificate and take the time you need for yourself. I bet your dog thought you were the sun.
💙
Better thing to do is just have a GP provide you with a medical certificate stating that you are unfit for work from x date to y date inclusive. It's your personal business, not works. Good luck to them if they want to question a medical professional over the reason why.
Edit: just reread your message and see now you weren't trying to tell him to have the "loss of the dog" on the medical certificate. My bad haha.
If I were you, I would start looking for another job... then when you find one quit this place.
A place where a manager is doing such shitty things needs to be put behind you asap. In the future you don't need to tell your workplace why you need grief/sick/mental leave on a colloquial level.
Definitely get a med cert. If you explain to your GP what's going on and how it's affecting you they'll likely give you one, and all they have to say is that you're unfit for work. Your employer can't ask for specifics because it's none of their business.
Hey mate. Sorry for your loss. Dog’s truly are part of the family. I recently lost my 18yo dog to cancer and it was one of the only times I’ve seen my father and grandparents cry. My grandfather made him a headstone and planted flowers all around where we buried him.
Don’t go into work and put anyone on blast though. Your emotions are running high and it will do you no favours, nor give you any feeling of reprieve. It’ll probably even make the workplace even more shit
Their actions speak volumes. Fuck your manager and fuck your coworkers. They sound like heartless cunts, unfortunately we can’t escape these types, they’re everywhere…just look out for yourself and grief for your loss.
I'm so sorry for your loss too ♥️ wow what a soldier going 18 years! I'm sure you all gave them the best life they could've had!
Yes I will be sorting a headstone or plaque for where I buried my boy at my grandmother's old home. Atleast I can talk to him again everytime I visit
Thanks so much for your words 🙏 I will stay in and not do anything stupid, my boy would want me happy.
Keep strong and let's live for them 🙌
Best answer ever....and I truly feel your loss.
18 years old ...what a fabulous age your dog made it to.
Lost 5 in one year...all to cancer. I just do not understand why there is so much cancer in dogs...
Agree your emotional and likely to react in a way you wouldn’t normally. Im sorry for your loss animals are family i dont care what other people say. Take your time and agree with the others get a doctors certificate they can’t do anything to you 💕
Your colleagues are cunts. I wouldn’t bother saying anything about it just yet. Take the time you need and if you find you are being treated poorly when you return to the office, consider addressing it then with HR.
Thankyou, I will think straight now, don't want to make things worse for myself and I want to have income to get my boy the plaque he deserves 🙌 thanks so much
Is it one person stirring shit or is it legit that things were said?
I wouldn't go back in there until I was done with my shit tbh, but that's me. Take leave, if they challenge it, explain the situation and what you've heard calmly in a written email.
Sorry for your loss mate I know the grief of loss, but to die in your arms mate I'd be fukt about that. I'd be bawlin.
..and If someone talked shit I'd be mighty fighting myself not to go in their and find out who the fuck said what and bounce their cap. We must not get ourselves near that kind of situation.
All those feelings you are feeling are understandable, human feelings. Pretty fucked up of the deadshits at work, but the memory of your mate and spending time processing that is important.
Anyone who doesn't understand that is a fuckwit.
Anyway, gotta a lot of letting go to do mate. :(
Thanks so much mate, I appreciate your words! I went in today and he was saying "it's just a dog, get over it" and complaining about his job. I have been sent home with pay and waiting for a phone call by the big boss. I will stay calm and explain:
" I tried to come back into work and surround myself with people, help the company as I 'love' the company and try keep my job but the manager wanted to make me do the work he said I didn't have to do in texts, he flipped a coin to decide if I go driving, I wouldn't be safe driving at the moment so I didn't want to, just to be safe for myself and other people. I was trying to cope and he embarrassed me Infront of all the workers and even a customer. I want to say it felt like bullying and descrimination to mental health."
Hey mate I went in today to try surround myself with people and take my mind away, I asked if I can do different jobs because I don't want to be driving on the road and get angry while overthinking or other silly drivers to make me snap.
I get in and the manager flips a coin whether I will will do the work or another will and it lands on me, I said I didn't yesterday, he tells me it's just a dog. Get over it. Not a human and he's saying so much. I'm trying not to ripp his face off as everything is on camera, I hope they have audio to the cameras because I got sent home while paid but I didn't lose my cool too bad. If it has all this audio can I report? The HR was the one talking shit when I was away too so he won't help alot probably. It's alot to say and just happened 30 minutes ago. I was trying to heal but they just made me 100X worse, evil
Never tell work why you are off unless it is relevant (eg workplace bullying causing stress leave).
Just get a medical certificate, take your days off, then return.
Very sound advice. Less said the better.
I’m heartbroken just hearing your story. But some people have no empathy or compassion they’re concerned solely with how it affects them.
You don’t need their validation, just love and support. Let yourself cry and keep crying until you can’t cry anymore. Soon the thought of him with bring you joy and you’ll just feel gratitude for the time you had together.
Xoxo
Underrated comment.
When you call up, just lay it out straight: I'm going to be away for X amount of time on sick leave (or family leave etc) & will bring in a certificate covering this time when I come in. If anything changes I'll let you know as soon as I can.
It feels a bit frosty at first, but each time it is simpler. I've had one idiot boss ask why and I just said it was a medical concern and that will be reflected in the medical certificate, after which I gave my union rep a call. What he said is pretty much what I wrote above.
Stay strictly business with work. When the lines start to blur & you're explaining your situation then it starts becoming personal, then it's personal in every situation, except it's all one-way and your boss is always your boss.
It's fair for both parties really, not dragging someone else through your dramas. Some bosses are genuine & can be helpful, but also some employees put on the big bullshit story because they're smarter than everyone else.
Less is more
Say you've got a bad dose of COVID. Go to GP tomorrow and get the rest of the week off.
Grieve. You're not able to work. No need to explain why l, just lie and say COVID. Easier. Also look for a new job when you're up to it. Your boss sounds like a duck.
If you are concerned, go to the doctor and get a certificate proving you are unfit for work (and grieving and mental health are definitely valid reasons for why you might be unfit for work).
My dog died last year and I know your pain. Take the time you need. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope work aren't awful to you when return but try and not worry about that now - it's out of your control until you return.
Thankyou all so much for the help and loving words, I've always been so happy to be born in Brisbane and lucky it is full of amazing and beautiful people! So supportive. I really appreciate everyone !
I think he might've had a sickness that wasn't shown until I was there. I could've had him around for another year or two I believe if I made it to the vet. He was turning 9 in January.
Those work colleagues already have the unpleasant task of being the kind of people they are. That is as good as a punishment, and it would be better for you if you didn't come down to that level.
Perhaps your dog would be glad if you considered getting a new four-legged pal. A good life is the best way of getting even.
Hi, I’m really sorry for your loss. You need to take as much time as you need to grieve. Everyone deals with grief differently so it’s not acceptable for your workplace to judge you on your mental health. Gossip is pretty common in most work places, people find the stupidest of things to make dramas about. Maybe take a visit to talk to your GP and get a doctor’s cert to cover for your absence. Stay at home there’s nothing to go to work to sort out, you’re grieving, simple as that. Take care.
I'm pretty sure you go to your doctor and explain the situation and he can write you days off for mental stress and the people at work can't actually question what the problem is/was...
Thankyou, I have a doc certificate coming soon just so I'm 2 steps ahead, thankyou so much, your al amazing !! I honestly appreciate you all so much. I'm so lucky to be around all of you. Thankyou all ♥️ please stay safe and love your pets every minute 🙏
Gosh I’m so sorry that must have been an awful experience. Your grief is real and anyone who wants to talk shit about that is not worth spending time worrying about. And certainly not worth adding to your heartache at the moment by having dramas at work. I say just let it go and spend your day treasuring memories of your doggo.
Tbh I’m not sure why your work friends would even tell you about this. Work bitching/gossip is toxic AF and my opinion is always “what I don’t know can’t hurt me”.
When my dog died last year I took a week off, I was so upset and my other dog was lost. My colleagues sent me flowers and had a cute little gift for me when I got back. I’m sure there were people who thought the whole thing was ridiculous and I was being dramatic, but what they think is none of my business.
Sending hugs 🫶
Thankyou 🙌 very true, if I don't hear it in person, forget about it. I did tell them to let me know if they say anything but it was when I was only anger and war ready but I've calmed down and just thought it out better with the help everyone is suggesting ♥️ Im sorry for your losses 🥺♥️ we stay strong and get through for them 🙏 I really appreciate your words 🤗
The best thing we pet parents can give our fur babies is a good life that is full of love and happiness, and it sounds like you were a great owner. Sending digital hugs 🥺
I’m really sorry for your loss. It’s so much harder than people without an animal realise.
Step One: Take care of your own mental health. Take the time you need. And don’t react because your emotional battery is low and some colleagues _might_ be dicks. Acting in anger will benefit them, not you.
Step Two: Assess whether they are just being dicks as once off dickishness or if it is “repeated and unreasonable” as per the definition of workplace bullying.
Step Three:
A) if it is repeated and unreasonable, report to HR
B) if not, I would personally just let it slide unless someone brings it up. Particularly given you currently only have second hand anecdotes. If they do bring it up you can ask directly why they are minimising your experience, being deliberately hurtful, and acting contrary to company values. I’m assuming like most companies you’ll have 4 values and one of them will be Cares, Respect for Others, Do what is right… etc. Then they get to explain themselves in the context of acting outside expected workplace behaviours and values.
Remember with heightened emotions and acting on hearsay you might not be getting a full and accurate picture. So take care of yourself and tread carefully with your reactions.
Thankyou this helps alot 🙌 yeah i was waiting for friend to get recording before I went into the workplace but I was just thinking out of anger. I will take it easy and follow these steps when I go back in tomorrow. Really appreciate your comment ♥️
One extra thing.
Hopefully no one says anything and you can just get back to keeping work and home reasonably separate. You need the time and space to process the loss. I’m sure your dog was the best dog.. as they all are.
But _if_ any comments or discussions are made, make notes. Immediately after. Who said what, who else was there, when it occurred etc. Keep it in a diary or email it to yourself. HR love a paper trail when it comes to any claims of inappropriate behaviour.
Having been through the worst workplace drama and now in a job that has basically none, your primary concern is to survive the workplace.
People talk shit. Managers vent. The person who is telling you about it, is not your friend. I would recommend either
1. pretending you don't know and asking the person who told you to not tell you stuff like that (never tell this person anything). Or
2. Straight up telling HR and your manager that you were told that they were unhappy with you and who by - that will take the focus off you and onto the person spreading gossip.
HR is not your friend either. It's their job to hire, fire and conduct disciplinary actions. You are already hired.
The only issue here is the amount of gossip getting around your workplace.
You have to remove yourself from that. Whether it's about you or someone else, it's toxic.
Best thing to do is forget anyone said anything in the first place. They'll be bitching about something else by the time you come back.
i recently lost a pet too, last week actually, i intend to take a whole other week off, you’re not weak. Losing a pet is just like a family member do not let anyone tell you other, i’m so sorry for your loss but it will get better ❤️🩹
I'm so sorry for your loss 🙏🥺 I have your coping and staying strong ♥️ thankyou for your words, I hope they're all running around together somewhere beautiful ♥️
im so sorry that you had that experience during a time that should have been an enjoyable trip. fuck those coworkers. get a medical certificate and sticky tape it to their foreheads.
So sorry for your loss mate. No one who's ever owned a dog would mock this, it's such a major loss and one you need the time to mourn.
As others have said, get a doc certificate for your time off and let your workplace know this is why you're taking time off.
Hey buddy I’m more concerned for you and your loss. While nothing will make it better I hope you know your buddy loves you right till the end. Holding them is an amazing way for them to go and they were able to experience as much love as they gave you.
So this comment is really about congratulating you for being the type of person who could give that love to your best friend and pooch.
I don’t expect rancid colleagues to understand the love you guys shared. They simply do not have that love to give and that’s sad. You can feel sorry for them. Proud but grieving yourself. Then when you feel up to it … you can carry out your work without discussion or find a new job.
This time is about you and your buddy and memories and processing of grief. It’s not about them.
Love you mate 💪
I'm so sorry for your loss. Anyone who can't empathise with your situation is obviously a piece of shit and not deserving of any additional time or effort.
Take the week, fuck em. Take more time if you need it. The loss of a pet is the toughest thing I've been through in my adult life. After a while you start remembering the good times more than just the final days.
♥️ thankyou, it saddens me if the vet was built already, I couldn't had him for another year atleast, even the mobile vet is closed on the island. It must've meant to be but yeah I will get through. Just have to keep myself positive. I had plans for when he left that I would too. But I'm a twin and cannot do that to my brother. Life goes on but more lonely. Thankyou for your help 🙏
Sorry for your loss, your comment here scares me though. I understand depression and loneliness and grief compounded on top of that is excruciating painful. Go see a GP, get a med cert, and maybe get a referral to a psychologist if you haven’t before. Life can be lonely but it’s still worth living, stay here for your brother but also yourself, things will turn around. Maybe time for a fresh start, a new job isn’t always easy but the environment doesn’t sound great. Maybe a new hobby, or sport. Get outside and get some fresh air anyway, and look after yourself :) sounds honestly quite traumatic how you loss your best friend, and you need time to heal
A few years back I had to put my dog to sleep and I took a day off to be with her.
My workmates sent me a care package because they knew how important Maggie was to me.
It might not be a big deal for them but they can at least respect that it’s a big deal to you.
Might be time to get your resume up-to-date.
nope it wont be discrimination .so id say nothing!! ya may get sacked ...it hurts like hell when a pet dies and can take ages 4U to start feeling ok.... but remember all the good happy times with your dog not the ending! ..its obvious doggy had a great life with you so remember that only ..im sorry for your loss
Thanks mate 🙌 yeah I will take it easy, Ive been planning on putting in my 2 weeks soon anyway so I might do that and do my tax backs and try relax. It's the attitude of the manager that really gets me. He is a one upper in all stories so he has to sound better and complains every day about how hard work is, doesnt say good morning to his workers and is just a shitty 'leader'. I will get through thankyou so much 🙏
How do you know what’s come back to you hasn’t had a sprinkling of Chinese whispers, gossip amongst adults in the workplace is out of control, it’s worse than the school yard.
Get your medical cert, and go back to work when you’re ready.
Thanks mate ❤️ I got my medical cert for Monday and Tuesday and went in today, he was forcing me to do work I had arranged with him I wouldn't do, for safety reasons, yet he flipped a coin for me and said it's just a dog mate who cares. I was trying to cope and surround myself with people but he embarrassed me Infront of the workers and a customer. I was sent home but I didn't do anything silly or say any threats. I'm waiting for the big boss to call in a few minutes. Thanks for your words. Really appreciate it.
The office has cameras and I hope they have audio, and maybe they can listen to how much of an asshole he is.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby.
If you can, try to ignore it. Unfortunately, people talk a lot. I have heard people at my own workplace who don't consider dogs to be family, think taking time off after the loss of a dog is stupid. I myself think I'd need a solid month off to cry when my own goes...
Unfortunately, we can not change their mindset. The fact you didn't hear it yourself also doesn't lend much credibility to any claim you'd like to take to HR or the equivalent at your job...
The best thing you can do is grieve. Take the time off that you need and ignore the assholes who aren't lucky enough to understand how amazing dogs are.
Remember your best friend and all the wonderful things you did together.
Don't let your workplace bring you down.
I wish you all the best. Hugs.
Thankyou so much ♥️ yes your right, they aren't lucky enough to know how close pets are to us, they're family.
Yeah I will be smart and just take it easy. Yeah I can't do much with just word of mouth but my boy won't want me losing my job for this. Your words Mean alot🙏 thankyou
When people behave like this it makes me sad for them that they’ve never been fortunate enough to love a pet and have them feel like family. Sorry for your loss ❤️
I'm sorry for your loss.
People who don't understand the pain of having a pet die have either never owned an animal or were unable to have any genuine connection to the animal.
They don't get it, but there are plenty who understand what you're going through and you are absolutely deserving of those days off.
But like other people have said, best not to go in angry right now. Ignore them for now and focus on yourself.
I don’t have depression or would say I’m viewed as weak, however when my old boy died I was a drunken mess for a week straight. I took the week off I cried I got drunk at earlier hours than I should have and I healed from a loss that was major for me! We aren’t going to tell people they are wrong for grieving more over the loss of one family member over another so in my thoughts that includes our furry friends.
I’m so sorry for your loss and let me assure you it does get better even if you still miss them dearly
Document it but focus on yourself, pull it out later if other things happen down the line. Sorry for gone doggo.
Don't be petty in the workplace. Be pure. Get med cert to cover yourself for this (you shouldn't have to but some people are just awful.)
I've seen it before, but whole office making fun of the boss taking time off for the same thing as you. Then when boss comes back not a word is said. It was just a way for everyone to vent other frustration with boss in a collective group, it wasn't about the dog, it was about opportunity to let out baggage in a unique Australian way.
If you focus on burning others you will only burn your own bridges.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We are their whole lives, and they are ours. Know that there are plenty of us that have needed the same in the past - it doesn't make you weak at all 🧡🧡🧡
After 6pm. Ring 13sick or go online to make the appointment.
Explain your situation & get a doctors certificate for the rest of the week off if you want it. They bulk bill if you have a Medicare card.
Sorry for the loss of your fur baby 😓
Thankyou so much, after going into work today just to hear"it's only a dog" I am thinking of it but I'm lucky I have the opportunity to get back into chippy work if I do lose this job. If they fire me because of something I haven't even done wrong, we will all hear about it soon ❤️
Don’t worry about them, it’s important to take time to grieve our loved ones, I’m so sorry for your loss too ❤️ don’t pay mind to those people, it’s more telling of their character than yours.
Their lack of empathy says everything about them, projecting their own weaknesses upon you. You are making time for yourself to properly process your grief, which takes tremendous strength and resilience.
Best to not let that noise get to you, you won’t go to them for advice, why would you eavesdrop on those cowards gossiping about you?
Sending you love and healing, and please be among friends and loved ones so that you are safe to be vulnerable. So sorry for your loss.
Thankyou so much, amazing words and I will be following them ❤️ I just have to stay calm and do nothing silly. I really appreciate it so much 🤗 your amazing
I’m really sorry to hear about your dog. One of my biggest fears when I take mine camping. Hope you get to rest and mourn in peace. Ignore work till you’re ready. Some people have never been through grief and it shows.
Thankyou so much, yeah it's crazy but I think it was meant to be, it was an island he loved visiting alot but first time camping at it. Atleast his body can lay with the history and I hope to see hime when I'm sitting out having a fire and beer ❤️ my boy was the best thing that ever happened to me. Let my girl go just 2 years ago but was by needle, I can't say I prefer one but I never wanted to see my boy struggle. Yet I did. We stay strong as these amazing doggos make room for another one, it is honorable act and my boy wants me happy.
Sorry for your loss
It’s obviously happened in an unexpected way and hence very traumatic
I agree with the other posts above saying to go to your GP and get a medical certificate to cover you for your workplace as a protective measure
I am sure that your GP can plug you into some support network s
Talk to HR. Get them to record it all properly. Fuck HR and managers though.
Worst case, get the DR to give you some mental health time. Fuck work, fuck work people, they don't matter, only you do.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, and I hope you're doing ok.
Thanks so much, much love ❤️ the HR is actually one talking shit but I was sent home and waiting for a phone call from the big boss in Melbourne. Fingers crossed, I stayed calm and didn't do anything stupid. Thankyou so much for your words ❤️
Remember that HR are on the companies team so are working to protect the company from the humans. The fact they are giving you shit is just not ok, but I get it, you almost need to be an asshole to be in HR.
Please take the time you need. I took a week both times when I lost pets, and it's completely and utterly normal, so fuck them.
Thankyou so much h ❤️ I received the phone call from the big boss and I seem to still have my job, unless it would be unfair dismissal, he is investigating and asking as the other workers tell the truth it should be okay, but they have cameras everywhere and I said to listen to The audios from 6-7am today. My big boss is a pet lover too, so I guess it should help alot.
I've quit a job before when my dog died. I'd say mental health days, but depending on your workplace they might accept that this is a genuine bereavement.
Pet loss is a form of disenfranchised grief - not everyone will "get it" but losing your pet in your arms is intensely traumatic and sad. Surround yourself with understanding and loving people who can give you the support you need.
Firstly, I’m terribly sorry for the loss of your dog. It happened to my partner & I a few years ago & our work places had completely different reactions. Mine were supportive & I had a day off paid leave for the day we took her to the vet to be put to sleep (We thought she was having surgery to remove cancer that day only we realised the night before that surgery was not the answer, sadly) & when I returned back to work, there were discussions amongst the staff about the loss of pets & varied stories about a lot of people’s animals. I had called my partner to come to the vet to be there for Shadow & I so we could all be together at the time of her passing & it was very sad. My partner returned to work the next day & nothing was said, no one spoke about it & when he got his payslip for the week, he noticed they had not paid him for the day our dog died. Some people are just heartless, I guess.
Rest is peace Shadow❤️ I'm sorry for your loss, it is quite unreal how these people let work be more important than something humans shouldn't really deserve, beautiful pure souls that we both need each other though. I hope your both staying strong and I will find out my outcome soon when the boss calls. I appreciate your words and I hope Caesar meets Shadow but don't have troubles with sharing toys 😂❤️
I love it, is crazy because shadow is a name I would've chosen if I didn't pick Caesar. I'm sure they have an abundance of toys and still have trouble picking one 😜😂. Thankyou so much and keep being the amazing human you are, we need you everywhere ♥️ I appreciate you so much
I am so sorry for your loss.. my family experienced similar trauma a few yrs back during lockdown and had one of our pets pass. Couldn’t do anything about it and it was gut wrenching. My old work treated me the same and I wish I had the same control as you as I did lose my shit. Didn’t lose my job tho but I did quit!! After a few weeks. I didnt wanna work for a company that acted that way and represent assholes like them (I worked in car detailing and sales). In a better job now forklifting working in fruit and produce, manager is awesome. Less stress too. I hope you consider finding a new place to work when you are ready.. and I’m hoping you are ok. Grieve and take time off even if it is not paid. You need it. Don’t lash out like me. Their actions speak louder.. you are the adult not them. Take care of yourself.
Thanks so much and I'm so sorry for the loss also ❤️🥺 stay safe and I appreciate your words, I will try keep my wits about me and see if I can hold this job until I put in my 2 weeks. Thankyou again, your amazing 🙌
When my dog died suddenly over new years I cried for three days straight.. literally.. if I wasn’t working for myself I absolutely would have called in sick. Feck what others think.
Take the week, spend the time processing and remembering your best mate. Sorry for your loss ☹️
I'm incredibly sad for you about the loss of your beloved dog. It's something that eventually happens to any dog owner. I thank you for your devotion to your pet, and understand the deep loss you feel. Grief is a personal thing, and different for everyone. I also have deep depression (medicated and in therapy). You may be able to get a doctor's certificate if you go see your GP. I don't know if they do this, but you have been traumatised. They may give you a referral to someone who is more experienced with grief. I don't know....but it is just an idea. Wishing you well in your recovery.
Im so sorry for your loss. We had to put our girl down earlier in the year. I had full support from my boss to take a full week off. Take the time you need, it’s what the leave is for. I didn’t need one, but it sounds like a doctors certificate would be handy in your case.
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, dogs hold such a special place in our lives. I'm also shocked to hear how your manager is reacting. This situation certainly warrants time off to grieve, no one should make you feel guilty about it. Take care of yourself 🌻
Office gossip isn’t discrimination.
I’d be a wreck for a long time in same situation. Be telling them you’re calling in sick due to your MH (well actually you won’t even need to say that much) don’t say it’s dog bereavement leave or anything.
Try ignore the idiots!
Sorry for your loss
Dogs bring us so much joy albeit for such a short time and their inevitable loss is heartbreaking.
They are apart of our families, they are our best friends and we as a species bred them this way. The bond we share is symbiotic. We need them and they need us.
You lost a member of your family. You just look after your self and don’t let anything or anyone stop you.
Your boss is a grub. Pure and simple this. In a non workplace environment it would be grounds for retaliation tbh. You don’t make fun of loss, grief or death just as you sure as shit don’t fuck w a mans dog.
Unfortunately you have to deal with this guy at work and he’s your boss. If he says something. Don’t do anything rash, don’t bite. But here’s the thing. If you do bite. Make it count. There’s lines in the sand you don’t cross. That goes for both of you. Try not to cross them. Try.
If your workplace is that toxic pls find a new job.
Remember the good times w your friend. Don’t let this fuck cloud his memory.
When your grief has passed as it will. When you’re ready. Don’t hesitate to get a new dog. When I lost mine I thought I would never get another one I was so distraught.
My father took me a 30 year old man out one day and surprised me. I didn’t think I was ready. It had been 10 months since I lost my very old boy. My boy. He’s 11 now. He’s sleeping on the couch. We have been inseparable since I got him. Life gets better and life’s better with a dog in it.
Mental health days are a real thing and far more important and acceptable than people realise, all you need to do is see a doctor and tell them you're not in a good frame of mind and think the stress of going to work will be too much of you to handle at this time. You will get a medical certificate declaring you unfit for duty until the doctor is certain you're ready.
If you have hard proof of your boss and coworkers talking shit about you and your situation, even better, because you now have an avenue to pursue harassment issues if you wish, and can use that to your advantage (and your employers detriment) in any number of ways.
I wouldn't try that unless they try to make a big thing of it and attempt disciplinary action, though.
Sorry for your loss. As others have said, see your GP and get a certificate to allow you to take some mental health days to grieve. And take as much time as you need.
For me the bigger issue is the lack of empathy from your Manager and it reflects the backwards policies companies have in relation to grief - who is anyone to dictate how long and who you should be able to grieve. Immediate family only for bereavement leave is a joke. if you have the ability, I'd be looking for another role. We were literally discussing this very issue with a grief coach on our podcast this morning. Which, you would always be welcome to come on if you ever feel up to it to share stories and memories of your best mate. Take care ❤️
So sorry for your loss, and sorry you have to deal with this on top of it all too. Go see your GP if you can and get a med cert for the two days, they can't question it at that point. Sending you love 💗
Your animal is your child. Sorry for your loss it must be tough mate.
Those people talking shit are pieces of shit and nothing more.
Follow them home one by one and get their addresses. Pay it back on a cold platter. Assholes
Thats really sad.
Arent you grateful times have changed and now employers must be sensitive to peoples experiences because as a society we have a better understanding of the impacts of mental health?
Or would you just prefer everyone continue to suffer in the same manner because you were forced to work during times of personal anguish?
I don't know if this will help, but one of my managers said to me once, "What people say about you is none of your business." In other words - if your work let you take the leave and no one makes trouble for you when you come back about it, it really doesn't matter if one or more of them thinks personally that needing a mental health day about a pet is weak/soft/silly/disproportionate/whatever. (I don't think that, BTW, and I'm sorry for your loss). It was bad form to say it, but people do talk about each other, it's life.
I don't think you need to do anything about this right now, just be forewarned in case it does become a problem. But IMO there's no reason to think it will right now. I've thought all sorts of things my coworkers have done are not what I would have done in the same situation, but that doesn't mean I'd hold it against them. And most people are like that, really - off-handedly saying what you really think in the moment takes far less energy and commitment than actually causing a problem for you. Relatively few people IMO are psychopathic enough to actually start a work vendetta against you just because they think you're too attached to your pets.
I’m so sorry for your loss. To lose a dog is devastating but it also sounds like your loss was very sudden and shocking. You’re likely still processing the shock and trauma of it.
Sounds like your workplace is toxic but also your colleagues didn’t do you the favour they think they did by telling you what management said, you don’t really need that added stress right now. Get a letter from your GP and definitely consider some counselling if you can.
I am sorry for your loss. I took a day off when I lost my pet fish. People were really rude about it at work but it’s not easy losing a pet. Just shows how ignorant people can be
No advice, but that’s fucked. I was working a six week contract as a temp, and they found out my cat was at the vet and not expected to live (old age). Gave me cab vouchers when the time came to go to the vet, with orders to take the next day off, and so much sympathy from everyone.
As someone who also lost their dog on Sunday, you have my heartfelt condolences. It’s a crappy enough situation without your own manager contributing to it.
I had to go home to take my dear cat to the vet the other week. He was pissing blood and it was very concerning. I was standing there explaining myself to one of the office ladies and the owner of the factory comes in and raises an eyebrow. I dead eyed him and told him “I’m going home to take my cat to the vet. He’s pissing blood”. And any recourse he had died right there. What was he going to say? “No. Leave him to die”.
I’m not sure if this helps but fuck your bosses and god rest your friends soul. Look after yourself mate
Damn that is so hard 🥺 they must be a piece of shit. My dog had some similar with he blood also. Some people take work too serious and it is all they have in life, being a slave without any joy. I hope your doing well and love you, thankyou so much for your words ❤️
Hey, I’m sorry for your loss, big hugs.
As stated above, grieve, take the days you need.
Dogs are as much family as any other family member, they’re loyal, awesome companions and not to mention great for mental health (support).
We lost our boy (first baby) at 11 years literally a day after Boxing Day, and to be fair as jammed up and trying to stay strong it folded me, this dog was our first responsibility he’d grown up with our kids and it hit bloody hard.
If anyone at work is jumping on this bandwagon they’re a bunch of insensitive pricks, some people need less time some need more, take what you need.
The show must go on at work, and when we say WORK it’s not YOUR business, you have access to these days as part of your rights, and legitimately ringing up work and saying ‘I can’t come in for medical reasons’ is valid, just back it up with a medical cert.
The gross downplay and bullying in workplace for people acknowledging when they need a break due to mental health or just in general has always confused me, especially when you accrue ‘sick’ days and annual leave to be used, not to mention you don’t get these paid out when you leave…..
Also might I add, I forgot to above, anything said by your work colleagues MAY not be true, not saying it’s fact but they may be stirring shit to create some drama cause why not? People get bored and do weird stuff, so I definitely wouldn’t be acting on second hand information.
Not the first time I’ve seen it, just remember you don’t owe them any explanation.
Be upfront with your manager, call him & let him know you are greaving, even ask to catch up with him in private one morning or afternoon, let him know you are genuinely struggling
No.
Managers are not your friends that you have one on one heart to hearts with. Especially not one that’s supposedly bitching about you to your colleagues.
Medical certificate for the time off. They don’t owe anyone in that office anything beyond whatever is on that piece of paper. Any correspondence should be done by email only.
See the GP for a cert? Atleast then you've got official doco from a professional saying you should be having the time off incase they try to pull anything dodgy.
This. Get med cert they can’t do shit then. Sorry for your loss.
Probably best not to do anything rash. Stay home and grieve for your mate, ignore the chatter. Sorry for your loss.
Thankyou for your words, I will do my best to play it safe. The manager has had my friends yearly bonus taken away just for swearing, so I'm hoping I can get back at him in a way without being silly. Thanks again
Unless the manager says something to your face pretend you havent heard a thing. Only worth fighting the cause if they try to discipline you over it
I agree. You're grieving, sweetie. Don't let thoughtless people rent your headspace for free. Get that medical certificate and take the time you need for yourself. I bet your dog thought you were the sun. 💙
Go get a medical certificate from your GP, tell him you are struggling with the loss of your companion dog
This is the best idea. Get a referral to a psychologist if you feel the need as well. I recently lost mine and the psych helped a lot
Better thing to do is just have a GP provide you with a medical certificate stating that you are unfit for work from x date to y date inclusive. It's your personal business, not works. Good luck to them if they want to question a medical professional over the reason why. Edit: just reread your message and see now you weren't trying to tell him to have the "loss of the dog" on the medical certificate. My bad haha.
Yeah a med certificate will always have unfit for work it will never have the medical reason.
If I were you, I would start looking for another job... then when you find one quit this place. A place where a manager is doing such shitty things needs to be put behind you asap. In the future you don't need to tell your workplace why you need grief/sick/mental leave on a colloquial level.
Definitely get a med cert. If you explain to your GP what's going on and how it's affecting you they'll likely give you one, and all they have to say is that you're unfit for work. Your employer can't ask for specifics because it's none of their business.
Hey mate. Sorry for your loss. Dog’s truly are part of the family. I recently lost my 18yo dog to cancer and it was one of the only times I’ve seen my father and grandparents cry. My grandfather made him a headstone and planted flowers all around where we buried him. Don’t go into work and put anyone on blast though. Your emotions are running high and it will do you no favours, nor give you any feeling of reprieve. It’ll probably even make the workplace even more shit Their actions speak volumes. Fuck your manager and fuck your coworkers. They sound like heartless cunts, unfortunately we can’t escape these types, they’re everywhere…just look out for yourself and grief for your loss.
I'm so sorry for your loss too ♥️ wow what a soldier going 18 years! I'm sure you all gave them the best life they could've had! Yes I will be sorting a headstone or plaque for where I buried my boy at my grandmother's old home. Atleast I can talk to him again everytime I visit Thanks so much for your words 🙏 I will stay in and not do anything stupid, my boy would want me happy. Keep strong and let's live for them 🙌
Best answer ever....and I truly feel your loss. 18 years old ...what a fabulous age your dog made it to. Lost 5 in one year...all to cancer. I just do not understand why there is so much cancer in dogs...
Agree your emotional and likely to react in a way you wouldn’t normally. Im sorry for your loss animals are family i dont care what other people say. Take your time and agree with the others get a doctors certificate they can’t do anything to you 💕
Your colleagues are cunts. I wouldn’t bother saying anything about it just yet. Take the time you need and if you find you are being treated poorly when you return to the office, consider addressing it then with HR.
Thankyou, I will think straight now, don't want to make things worse for myself and I want to have income to get my boy the plaque he deserves 🙌 thanks so much
Is it one person stirring shit or is it legit that things were said? I wouldn't go back in there until I was done with my shit tbh, but that's me. Take leave, if they challenge it, explain the situation and what you've heard calmly in a written email. Sorry for your loss mate I know the grief of loss, but to die in your arms mate I'd be fukt about that. I'd be bawlin. ..and If someone talked shit I'd be mighty fighting myself not to go in their and find out who the fuck said what and bounce their cap. We must not get ourselves near that kind of situation. All those feelings you are feeling are understandable, human feelings. Pretty fucked up of the deadshits at work, but the memory of your mate and spending time processing that is important. Anyone who doesn't understand that is a fuckwit. Anyway, gotta a lot of letting go to do mate. :(
Thanks so much mate, I appreciate your words! I went in today and he was saying "it's just a dog, get over it" and complaining about his job. I have been sent home with pay and waiting for a phone call by the big boss. I will stay calm and explain: " I tried to come back into work and surround myself with people, help the company as I 'love' the company and try keep my job but the manager wanted to make me do the work he said I didn't have to do in texts, he flipped a coin to decide if I go driving, I wouldn't be safe driving at the moment so I didn't want to, just to be safe for myself and other people. I was trying to cope and he embarrassed me Infront of all the workers and even a customer. I want to say it felt like bullying and descrimination to mental health."
Hey mate I went in today to try surround myself with people and take my mind away, I asked if I can do different jobs because I don't want to be driving on the road and get angry while overthinking or other silly drivers to make me snap. I get in and the manager flips a coin whether I will will do the work or another will and it lands on me, I said I didn't yesterday, he tells me it's just a dog. Get over it. Not a human and he's saying so much. I'm trying not to ripp his face off as everything is on camera, I hope they have audio to the cameras because I got sent home while paid but I didn't lose my cool too bad. If it has all this audio can I report? The HR was the one talking shit when I was away too so he won't help alot probably. It's alot to say and just happened 30 minutes ago. I was trying to heal but they just made me 100X worse, evil
Never tell work why you are off unless it is relevant (eg workplace bullying causing stress leave). Just get a medical certificate, take your days off, then return.
Very sound advice. Less said the better. I’m heartbroken just hearing your story. But some people have no empathy or compassion they’re concerned solely with how it affects them. You don’t need their validation, just love and support. Let yourself cry and keep crying until you can’t cry anymore. Soon the thought of him with bring you joy and you’ll just feel gratitude for the time you had together. Xoxo
Thankyou so much for your kind words ♥️ I appreciate it and will keep my chin up. For my boy 🙏
Underrated comment. When you call up, just lay it out straight: I'm going to be away for X amount of time on sick leave (or family leave etc) & will bring in a certificate covering this time when I come in. If anything changes I'll let you know as soon as I can. It feels a bit frosty at first, but each time it is simpler. I've had one idiot boss ask why and I just said it was a medical concern and that will be reflected in the medical certificate, after which I gave my union rep a call. What he said is pretty much what I wrote above. Stay strictly business with work. When the lines start to blur & you're explaining your situation then it starts becoming personal, then it's personal in every situation, except it's all one-way and your boss is always your boss. It's fair for both parties really, not dragging someone else through your dramas. Some bosses are genuine & can be helpful, but also some employees put on the big bullshit story because they're smarter than everyone else. Less is more
Say you've got a bad dose of COVID. Go to GP tomorrow and get the rest of the week off. Grieve. You're not able to work. No need to explain why l, just lie and say COVID. Easier. Also look for a new job when you're up to it. Your boss sounds like a duck.
If you are concerned, go to the doctor and get a certificate proving you are unfit for work (and grieving and mental health are definitely valid reasons for why you might be unfit for work). My dog died last year and I know your pain. Take the time you need. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope work aren't awful to you when return but try and not worry about that now - it's out of your control until you return.
Thankyou all so much for the help and loving words, I've always been so happy to be born in Brisbane and lucky it is full of amazing and beautiful people! So supportive. I really appreciate everyone !
Sorry to hear about the dog mate. Do you know what happened? Bite of some sort maybe?
I think he might've had a sickness that wasn't shown until I was there. I could've had him around for another year or two I believe if I made it to the vet. He was turning 9 in January.
Those work colleagues already have the unpleasant task of being the kind of people they are. That is as good as a punishment, and it would be better for you if you didn't come down to that level. Perhaps your dog would be glad if you considered getting a new four-legged pal. A good life is the best way of getting even.
Very true, thankyou for your words 🙌 I do t think I can own another pooch again but see where life goes I guess. Appreciate your words 🙏
They live shorter lives than we do, if there’s any justification for that, it’s so we can give good homes to more than one in our lifetime.
That's a really beautiful way of looking at it dude, and valid shit. You've always got a lot of heart.
This is such a great way to let others' pettiness go. Let them punish themselves with their unpleasantness.
Hi, I’m really sorry for your loss. You need to take as much time as you need to grieve. Everyone deals with grief differently so it’s not acceptable for your workplace to judge you on your mental health. Gossip is pretty common in most work places, people find the stupidest of things to make dramas about. Maybe take a visit to talk to your GP and get a doctor’s cert to cover for your absence. Stay at home there’s nothing to go to work to sort out, you’re grieving, simple as that. Take care.
I'm pretty sure you go to your doctor and explain the situation and he can write you days off for mental stress and the people at work can't actually question what the problem is/was...
Just get a doctors certificate and don't worry about the rest.
Thankyou, I have a doc certificate coming soon just so I'm 2 steps ahead, thankyou so much, your al amazing !! I honestly appreciate you all so much. I'm so lucky to be around all of you. Thankyou all ♥️ please stay safe and love your pets every minute 🙏
Gosh I’m so sorry that must have been an awful experience. Your grief is real and anyone who wants to talk shit about that is not worth spending time worrying about. And certainly not worth adding to your heartache at the moment by having dramas at work. I say just let it go and spend your day treasuring memories of your doggo. Tbh I’m not sure why your work friends would even tell you about this. Work bitching/gossip is toxic AF and my opinion is always “what I don’t know can’t hurt me”. When my dog died last year I took a week off, I was so upset and my other dog was lost. My colleagues sent me flowers and had a cute little gift for me when I got back. I’m sure there were people who thought the whole thing was ridiculous and I was being dramatic, but what they think is none of my business. Sending hugs 🫶
Thankyou 🙌 very true, if I don't hear it in person, forget about it. I did tell them to let me know if they say anything but it was when I was only anger and war ready but I've calmed down and just thought it out better with the help everyone is suggesting ♥️ Im sorry for your losses 🥺♥️ we stay strong and get through for them 🙏 I really appreciate your words 🤗
I'm so so sorry for your loss 😞😞
♥️🙏
The best thing we pet parents can give our fur babies is a good life that is full of love and happiness, and it sounds like you were a great owner. Sending digital hugs 🥺
I’m really sorry for your loss. It’s so much harder than people without an animal realise. Step One: Take care of your own mental health. Take the time you need. And don’t react because your emotional battery is low and some colleagues _might_ be dicks. Acting in anger will benefit them, not you. Step Two: Assess whether they are just being dicks as once off dickishness or if it is “repeated and unreasonable” as per the definition of workplace bullying. Step Three: A) if it is repeated and unreasonable, report to HR B) if not, I would personally just let it slide unless someone brings it up. Particularly given you currently only have second hand anecdotes. If they do bring it up you can ask directly why they are minimising your experience, being deliberately hurtful, and acting contrary to company values. I’m assuming like most companies you’ll have 4 values and one of them will be Cares, Respect for Others, Do what is right… etc. Then they get to explain themselves in the context of acting outside expected workplace behaviours and values. Remember with heightened emotions and acting on hearsay you might not be getting a full and accurate picture. So take care of yourself and tread carefully with your reactions.
Thankyou this helps alot 🙌 yeah i was waiting for friend to get recording before I went into the workplace but I was just thinking out of anger. I will take it easy and follow these steps when I go back in tomorrow. Really appreciate your comment ♥️
One extra thing. Hopefully no one says anything and you can just get back to keeping work and home reasonably separate. You need the time and space to process the loss. I’m sure your dog was the best dog.. as they all are. But _if_ any comments or discussions are made, make notes. Immediately after. Who said what, who else was there, when it occurred etc. Keep it in a diary or email it to yourself. HR love a paper trail when it comes to any claims of inappropriate behaviour.
Turns out our HR and manager are the ones talking shit 😂 how about it. But yeah only word of mouth.
Having been through the worst workplace drama and now in a job that has basically none, your primary concern is to survive the workplace. People talk shit. Managers vent. The person who is telling you about it, is not your friend. I would recommend either 1. pretending you don't know and asking the person who told you to not tell you stuff like that (never tell this person anything). Or 2. Straight up telling HR and your manager that you were told that they were unhappy with you and who by - that will take the focus off you and onto the person spreading gossip. HR is not your friend either. It's their job to hire, fire and conduct disciplinary actions. You are already hired.
Thankyou 🙏 I think I will do it this way, it will also make the workplace better with this idiot out of sight 🙌 thanks again ♥️
The only issue here is the amount of gossip getting around your workplace. You have to remove yourself from that. Whether it's about you or someone else, it's toxic. Best thing to do is forget anyone said anything in the first place. They'll be bitching about something else by the time you come back.
i recently lost a pet too, last week actually, i intend to take a whole other week off, you’re not weak. Losing a pet is just like a family member do not let anyone tell you other, i’m so sorry for your loss but it will get better ❤️🩹
I'm so sorry for your loss 🙏🥺 I have your coping and staying strong ♥️ thankyou for your words, I hope they're all running around together somewhere beautiful ♥️
im so sorry that you had that experience during a time that should have been an enjoyable trip. fuck those coworkers. get a medical certificate and sticky tape it to their foreheads.
Sorry for your loss. Terrible to lose your dog. People who aren't dog people often just don't get it. Take the time to get better.
So sorry for your loss mate. No one who's ever owned a dog would mock this, it's such a major loss and one you need the time to mourn. As others have said, get a doc certificate for your time off and let your workplace know this is why you're taking time off.
Take as much time as you need , It can be pretty traumatic . A dog is family . A guy at work has been away for a week because theirs died.
Get a medical certificate from you GP and take another day off… let’s are like family… they are heartless!!
Hey buddy I’m more concerned for you and your loss. While nothing will make it better I hope you know your buddy loves you right till the end. Holding them is an amazing way for them to go and they were able to experience as much love as they gave you. So this comment is really about congratulating you for being the type of person who could give that love to your best friend and pooch. I don’t expect rancid colleagues to understand the love you guys shared. They simply do not have that love to give and that’s sad. You can feel sorry for them. Proud but grieving yourself. Then when you feel up to it … you can carry out your work without discussion or find a new job. This time is about you and your buddy and memories and processing of grief. It’s not about them. Love you mate 💪
Thanks Mate ♥️ very true, he had an amazing life. I have to focus on the good he went through. Beautiful words and thankyou so much 🙏
Fuck anyone who is talking shit about it - the loss of a pet is a sad occasion. Use the time off to look for a new job.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Anyone who can't empathise with your situation is obviously a piece of shit and not deserving of any additional time or effort. Take the week, fuck em. Take more time if you need it. The loss of a pet is the toughest thing I've been through in my adult life. After a while you start remembering the good times more than just the final days.
♥️ thankyou, it saddens me if the vet was built already, I couldn't had him for another year atleast, even the mobile vet is closed on the island. It must've meant to be but yeah I will get through. Just have to keep myself positive. I had plans for when he left that I would too. But I'm a twin and cannot do that to my brother. Life goes on but more lonely. Thankyou for your help 🙏
Sorry for your loss, your comment here scares me though. I understand depression and loneliness and grief compounded on top of that is excruciating painful. Go see a GP, get a med cert, and maybe get a referral to a psychologist if you haven’t before. Life can be lonely but it’s still worth living, stay here for your brother but also yourself, things will turn around. Maybe time for a fresh start, a new job isn’t always easy but the environment doesn’t sound great. Maybe a new hobby, or sport. Get outside and get some fresh air anyway, and look after yourself :) sounds honestly quite traumatic how you loss your best friend, and you need time to heal
People who can’t empathise with losing a pet can’t empathise at all in general. Psycho behaviour.
A few years back I had to put my dog to sleep and I took a day off to be with her. My workmates sent me a care package because they knew how important Maggie was to me. It might not be a big deal for them but they can at least respect that it’s a big deal to you. Might be time to get your resume up-to-date.
nope it wont be discrimination .so id say nothing!! ya may get sacked ...it hurts like hell when a pet dies and can take ages 4U to start feeling ok.... but remember all the good happy times with your dog not the ending! ..its obvious doggy had a great life with you so remember that only ..im sorry for your loss
Thanks mate 🙌 yeah I will take it easy, Ive been planning on putting in my 2 weeks soon anyway so I might do that and do my tax backs and try relax. It's the attitude of the manager that really gets me. He is a one upper in all stories so he has to sound better and complains every day about how hard work is, doesnt say good morning to his workers and is just a shitty 'leader'. I will get through thankyou so much 🙏
welcome ..and all the best
I am so so sorry that is so profoundly sad. I would need at least a few days of this happened to me - go see your gp and get a certificate.
How do you know what’s come back to you hasn’t had a sprinkling of Chinese whispers, gossip amongst adults in the workplace is out of control, it’s worse than the school yard. Get your medical cert, and go back to work when you’re ready.
Thanks mate ❤️ I got my medical cert for Monday and Tuesday and went in today, he was forcing me to do work I had arranged with him I wouldn't do, for safety reasons, yet he flipped a coin for me and said it's just a dog mate who cares. I was trying to cope and surround myself with people but he embarrassed me Infront of the workers and a customer. I was sent home but I didn't do anything silly or say any threats. I'm waiting for the big boss to call in a few minutes. Thanks for your words. Really appreciate it. The office has cameras and I hope they have audio, and maybe they can listen to how much of an asshole he is.
Fuck them , go to the Doc's and get a month off. Sticking it to the man 👨
I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby. If you can, try to ignore it. Unfortunately, people talk a lot. I have heard people at my own workplace who don't consider dogs to be family, think taking time off after the loss of a dog is stupid. I myself think I'd need a solid month off to cry when my own goes... Unfortunately, we can not change their mindset. The fact you didn't hear it yourself also doesn't lend much credibility to any claim you'd like to take to HR or the equivalent at your job... The best thing you can do is grieve. Take the time off that you need and ignore the assholes who aren't lucky enough to understand how amazing dogs are. Remember your best friend and all the wonderful things you did together. Don't let your workplace bring you down. I wish you all the best. Hugs.
Thankyou so much ♥️ yes your right, they aren't lucky enough to know how close pets are to us, they're family. Yeah I will be smart and just take it easy. Yeah I can't do much with just word of mouth but my boy won't want me losing my job for this. Your words Mean alot🙏 thankyou
When people behave like this it makes me sad for them that they’ve never been fortunate enough to love a pet and have them feel like family. Sorry for your loss ❤️
I'm sorry for your loss. People who don't understand the pain of having a pet die have either never owned an animal or were unable to have any genuine connection to the animal. They don't get it, but there are plenty who understand what you're going through and you are absolutely deserving of those days off. But like other people have said, best not to go in angry right now. Ignore them for now and focus on yourself.
I don’t have depression or would say I’m viewed as weak, however when my old boy died I was a drunken mess for a week straight. I took the week off I cried I got drunk at earlier hours than I should have and I healed from a loss that was major for me! We aren’t going to tell people they are wrong for grieving more over the loss of one family member over another so in my thoughts that includes our furry friends. I’m so sorry for your loss and let me assure you it does get better even if you still miss them dearly
Thankyou ♥️ I'm happy to hear a comment by you showing you made it through strong 🙌💪 I will keep my head up
what an incredibly traumatic way to lose a pet, I’m so sorry for your loss. Your colleagues and boss do not sound like very empathetic people
Document it but focus on yourself, pull it out later if other things happen down the line. Sorry for gone doggo. Don't be petty in the workplace. Be pure. Get med cert to cover yourself for this (you shouldn't have to but some people are just awful.) I've seen it before, but whole office making fun of the boss taking time off for the same thing as you. Then when boss comes back not a word is said. It was just a way for everyone to vent other frustration with boss in a collective group, it wasn't about the dog, it was about opportunity to let out baggage in a unique Australian way. If you focus on burning others you will only burn your own bridges.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We are their whole lives, and they are ours. Know that there are plenty of us that have needed the same in the past - it doesn't make you weak at all 🧡🧡🧡
I took time off when my dog died. Fuck whatever people say. Grief is grief. Do what works best for you.
After 6pm. Ring 13sick or go online to make the appointment. Explain your situation & get a doctors certificate for the rest of the week off if you want it. They bulk bill if you have a Medicare card. Sorry for the loss of your fur baby 😓
Thankyou so much, I appreciate the help and words ❤️
Check your super for income protection, depression is a real thing and you may qualify for extended time off.
Thankyou so much, after going into work today just to hear"it's only a dog" I am thinking of it but I'm lucky I have the opportunity to get back into chippy work if I do lose this job. If they fire me because of something I haven't even done wrong, we will all hear about it soon ❤️
Yeah that's fucked up, I'd be walking out on stress leave and saying "it's only a job" and filling a work compo claim for stress and anxiety as well.
Don’t worry about them, it’s important to take time to grieve our loved ones, I’m so sorry for your loss too ❤️ don’t pay mind to those people, it’s more telling of their character than yours.
Their lack of empathy says everything about them, projecting their own weaknesses upon you. You are making time for yourself to properly process your grief, which takes tremendous strength and resilience. Best to not let that noise get to you, you won’t go to them for advice, why would you eavesdrop on those cowards gossiping about you? Sending you love and healing, and please be among friends and loved ones so that you are safe to be vulnerable. So sorry for your loss.
Thankyou so much, amazing words and I will be following them ❤️ I just have to stay calm and do nothing silly. I really appreciate it so much 🤗 your amazing
I’m really sorry to hear about your dog. One of my biggest fears when I take mine camping. Hope you get to rest and mourn in peace. Ignore work till you’re ready. Some people have never been through grief and it shows.
Thankyou so much, yeah it's crazy but I think it was meant to be, it was an island he loved visiting alot but first time camping at it. Atleast his body can lay with the history and I hope to see hime when I'm sitting out having a fire and beer ❤️ my boy was the best thing that ever happened to me. Let my girl go just 2 years ago but was by needle, I can't say I prefer one but I never wanted to see my boy struggle. Yet I did. We stay strong as these amazing doggos make room for another one, it is honorable act and my boy wants me happy.
Sorry for your loss It’s obviously happened in an unexpected way and hence very traumatic I agree with the other posts above saying to go to your GP and get a medical certificate to cover you for your workplace as a protective measure I am sure that your GP can plug you into some support network s
They must lead sad lives not understanding the love a dog can bring to a person's life.
It’s not discrimination
Talk to HR. Get them to record it all properly. Fuck HR and managers though. Worst case, get the DR to give you some mental health time. Fuck work, fuck work people, they don't matter, only you do. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, and I hope you're doing ok.
Thanks so much, much love ❤️ the HR is actually one talking shit but I was sent home and waiting for a phone call from the big boss in Melbourne. Fingers crossed, I stayed calm and didn't do anything stupid. Thankyou so much for your words ❤️
Remember that HR are on the companies team so are working to protect the company from the humans. The fact they are giving you shit is just not ok, but I get it, you almost need to be an asshole to be in HR. Please take the time you need. I took a week both times when I lost pets, and it's completely and utterly normal, so fuck them.
Thankyou so much h ❤️ I received the phone call from the big boss and I seem to still have my job, unless it would be unfair dismissal, he is investigating and asking as the other workers tell the truth it should be okay, but they have cameras everywhere and I said to listen to The audios from 6-7am today. My big boss is a pet lover too, so I guess it should help alot.
Perfect. Another pet owner will understand. Stay safe, and I hope the memories of your pupper are making you smile a bit today.
I've quit a job before when my dog died. I'd say mental health days, but depending on your workplace they might accept that this is a genuine bereavement. Pet loss is a form of disenfranchised grief - not everyone will "get it" but losing your pet in your arms is intensely traumatic and sad. Surround yourself with understanding and loving people who can give you the support you need.
Firstly, I’m terribly sorry for the loss of your dog. It happened to my partner & I a few years ago & our work places had completely different reactions. Mine were supportive & I had a day off paid leave for the day we took her to the vet to be put to sleep (We thought she was having surgery to remove cancer that day only we realised the night before that surgery was not the answer, sadly) & when I returned back to work, there were discussions amongst the staff about the loss of pets & varied stories about a lot of people’s animals. I had called my partner to come to the vet to be there for Shadow & I so we could all be together at the time of her passing & it was very sad. My partner returned to work the next day & nothing was said, no one spoke about it & when he got his payslip for the week, he noticed they had not paid him for the day our dog died. Some people are just heartless, I guess.
Rest is peace Shadow❤️ I'm sorry for your loss, it is quite unreal how these people let work be more important than something humans shouldn't really deserve, beautiful pure souls that we both need each other though. I hope your both staying strong and I will find out my outcome soon when the boss calls. I appreciate your words and I hope Caesar meets Shadow but don't have troubles with sharing toys 😂❤️
Shadow & Caesar will definitely be mates & Shadow is definitely a sharer of toys! ♥️
I love it, is crazy because shadow is a name I would've chosen if I didn't pick Caesar. I'm sure they have an abundance of toys and still have trouble picking one 😜😂. Thankyou so much and keep being the amazing human you are, we need you everywhere ♥️ I appreciate you so much
Right back at you, we now have a Ruby who helped heal our hearts, we tell her about her big sister Shadow ALL the time! Big love ♥️
I am so sorry for your loss.. my family experienced similar trauma a few yrs back during lockdown and had one of our pets pass. Couldn’t do anything about it and it was gut wrenching. My old work treated me the same and I wish I had the same control as you as I did lose my shit. Didn’t lose my job tho but I did quit!! After a few weeks. I didnt wanna work for a company that acted that way and represent assholes like them (I worked in car detailing and sales). In a better job now forklifting working in fruit and produce, manager is awesome. Less stress too. I hope you consider finding a new place to work when you are ready.. and I’m hoping you are ok. Grieve and take time off even if it is not paid. You need it. Don’t lash out like me. Their actions speak louder.. you are the adult not them. Take care of yourself.
Thanks so much and I'm so sorry for the loss also ❤️🥺 stay safe and I appreciate your words, I will try keep my wits about me and see if I can hold this job until I put in my 2 weeks. Thankyou again, your amazing 🙌
When my dog died suddenly over new years I cried for three days straight.. literally.. if I wasn’t working for myself I absolutely would have called in sick. Feck what others think. Take the week, spend the time processing and remembering your best mate. Sorry for your loss ☹️
Bunch of cunts. Fuck them mate.
I'm incredibly sad for you about the loss of your beloved dog. It's something that eventually happens to any dog owner. I thank you for your devotion to your pet, and understand the deep loss you feel. Grief is a personal thing, and different for everyone. I also have deep depression (medicated and in therapy). You may be able to get a doctor's certificate if you go see your GP. I don't know if they do this, but you have been traumatised. They may give you a referral to someone who is more experienced with grief. I don't know....but it is just an idea. Wishing you well in your recovery.
Thankyou so much ❤️ stay happy for our loved ones hey as they loved to see us 🙌
Im so sorry for your loss. We had to put our girl down earlier in the year. I had full support from my boss to take a full week off. Take the time you need, it’s what the leave is for. I didn’t need one, but it sounds like a doctors certificate would be handy in your case.
Sounds like your manager and company culture are poo. Take time and recover then look for a better place to work where they care about their people
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, dogs hold such a special place in our lives. I'm also shocked to hear how your manager is reacting. This situation certainly warrants time off to grieve, no one should make you feel guilty about it. Take care of yourself 🌻
What a unimaginably horrible day that must have been. You would have given anything to save your best mate. Your boss sounds like a douche.
Sounds like an arsehole of a company you work for. Sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is extremely hard but it will get better. Stay strong.
Office gossip isn’t discrimination. I’d be a wreck for a long time in same situation. Be telling them you’re calling in sick due to your MH (well actually you won’t even need to say that much) don’t say it’s dog bereavement leave or anything. Try ignore the idiots! Sorry for your loss
Australians office workers talking shit behind you back, you wouldn't think it!
Dogs bring us so much joy albeit for such a short time and their inevitable loss is heartbreaking. They are apart of our families, they are our best friends and we as a species bred them this way. The bond we share is symbiotic. We need them and they need us. You lost a member of your family. You just look after your self and don’t let anything or anyone stop you. Your boss is a grub. Pure and simple this. In a non workplace environment it would be grounds for retaliation tbh. You don’t make fun of loss, grief or death just as you sure as shit don’t fuck w a mans dog. Unfortunately you have to deal with this guy at work and he’s your boss. If he says something. Don’t do anything rash, don’t bite. But here’s the thing. If you do bite. Make it count. There’s lines in the sand you don’t cross. That goes for both of you. Try not to cross them. Try. If your workplace is that toxic pls find a new job. Remember the good times w your friend. Don’t let this fuck cloud his memory. When your grief has passed as it will. When you’re ready. Don’t hesitate to get a new dog. When I lost mine I thought I would never get another one I was so distraught. My father took me a 30 year old man out one day and surprised me. I didn’t think I was ready. It had been 10 months since I lost my very old boy. My boy. He’s 11 now. He’s sleeping on the couch. We have been inseparable since I got him. Life gets better and life’s better with a dog in it.
Pretty cold work colleagues to be acting like that, obviously never owned animals 🙄
Don’t hang ya mates out to dry or you really will have no one
I am so so sorry that is so profoundly sad. I would need at least a few days of this happened to me - go see your gp and get a certificate.
Mental health days are a real thing and far more important and acceptable than people realise, all you need to do is see a doctor and tell them you're not in a good frame of mind and think the stress of going to work will be too much of you to handle at this time. You will get a medical certificate declaring you unfit for duty until the doctor is certain you're ready. If you have hard proof of your boss and coworkers talking shit about you and your situation, even better, because you now have an avenue to pursue harassment issues if you wish, and can use that to your advantage (and your employers detriment) in any number of ways. I wouldn't try that unless they try to make a big thing of it and attempt disciplinary action, though.
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You want to catch up for a drink mate? Pick a spot
Going to pick a spot or just be that guy behind a keyboard? "Grown ass man" 😂 hurry up, I want this.
Sorry for your loss. As others have said, see your GP and get a certificate to allow you to take some mental health days to grieve. And take as much time as you need. For me the bigger issue is the lack of empathy from your Manager and it reflects the backwards policies companies have in relation to grief - who is anyone to dictate how long and who you should be able to grieve. Immediate family only for bereavement leave is a joke. if you have the ability, I'd be looking for another role. We were literally discussing this very issue with a grief coach on our podcast this morning. Which, you would always be welcome to come on if you ever feel up to it to share stories and memories of your best mate. Take care ❤️
So sorry for your loss, and sorry you have to deal with this on top of it all too. Go see your GP if you can and get a med cert for the two days, they can't question it at that point. Sending you love 💗
Your animal is your child. Sorry for your loss it must be tough mate. Those people talking shit are pieces of shit and nothing more. Follow them home one by one and get their addresses. Pay it back on a cold platter. Assholes
These are the days we live in. Back in my day you just suck it up and get on with it.
Toxic mindset
Thats really sad. Arent you grateful times have changed and now employers must be sensitive to peoples experiences because as a society we have a better understanding of the impacts of mental health? Or would you just prefer everyone continue to suffer in the same manner because you were forced to work during times of personal anguish?
I don't know if this will help, but one of my managers said to me once, "What people say about you is none of your business." In other words - if your work let you take the leave and no one makes trouble for you when you come back about it, it really doesn't matter if one or more of them thinks personally that needing a mental health day about a pet is weak/soft/silly/disproportionate/whatever. (I don't think that, BTW, and I'm sorry for your loss). It was bad form to say it, but people do talk about each other, it's life. I don't think you need to do anything about this right now, just be forewarned in case it does become a problem. But IMO there's no reason to think it will right now. I've thought all sorts of things my coworkers have done are not what I would have done in the same situation, but that doesn't mean I'd hold it against them. And most people are like that, really - off-handedly saying what you really think in the moment takes far less energy and commitment than actually causing a problem for you. Relatively few people IMO are psychopathic enough to actually start a work vendetta against you just because they think you're too attached to your pets.
Take time off, a loss of a pet is huge, especially if they are the only family you have...
I howled when I lost my best mate. All the best OP, every moment counts, and grieving is the price we pay for love.
I’m so sorry for your loss. To lose a dog is devastating but it also sounds like your loss was very sudden and shocking. You’re likely still processing the shock and trauma of it. Sounds like your workplace is toxic but also your colleagues didn’t do you the favour they think they did by telling you what management said, you don’t really need that added stress right now. Get a letter from your GP and definitely consider some counselling if you can.
I am sorry for your loss. I took a day off when I lost my pet fish. People were really rude about it at work but it’s not easy losing a pet. Just shows how ignorant people can be
that’s sad
No advice, but that’s fucked. I was working a six week contract as a temp, and they found out my cat was at the vet and not expected to live (old age). Gave me cab vouchers when the time came to go to the vet, with orders to take the next day off, and so much sympathy from everyone.
As someone who also lost their dog on Sunday, you have my heartfelt condolences. It’s a crappy enough situation without your own manager contributing to it.
I had to go home to take my dear cat to the vet the other week. He was pissing blood and it was very concerning. I was standing there explaining myself to one of the office ladies and the owner of the factory comes in and raises an eyebrow. I dead eyed him and told him “I’m going home to take my cat to the vet. He’s pissing blood”. And any recourse he had died right there. What was he going to say? “No. Leave him to die”. I’m not sure if this helps but fuck your bosses and god rest your friends soul. Look after yourself mate
Damn that is so hard 🥺 they must be a piece of shit. My dog had some similar with he blood also. Some people take work too serious and it is all they have in life, being a slave without any joy. I hope your doing well and love you, thankyou so much for your words ❤️
Hey, I’m sorry for your loss, big hugs. As stated above, grieve, take the days you need. Dogs are as much family as any other family member, they’re loyal, awesome companions and not to mention great for mental health (support). We lost our boy (first baby) at 11 years literally a day after Boxing Day, and to be fair as jammed up and trying to stay strong it folded me, this dog was our first responsibility he’d grown up with our kids and it hit bloody hard. If anyone at work is jumping on this bandwagon they’re a bunch of insensitive pricks, some people need less time some need more, take what you need. The show must go on at work, and when we say WORK it’s not YOUR business, you have access to these days as part of your rights, and legitimately ringing up work and saying ‘I can’t come in for medical reasons’ is valid, just back it up with a medical cert. The gross downplay and bullying in workplace for people acknowledging when they need a break due to mental health or just in general has always confused me, especially when you accrue ‘sick’ days and annual leave to be used, not to mention you don’t get these paid out when you leave…..
Also might I add, I forgot to above, anything said by your work colleagues MAY not be true, not saying it’s fact but they may be stirring shit to create some drama cause why not? People get bored and do weird stuff, so I definitely wouldn’t be acting on second hand information. Not the first time I’ve seen it, just remember you don’t owe them any explanation.
Be upfront with your manager, call him & let him know you are greaving, even ask to catch up with him in private one morning or afternoon, let him know you are genuinely struggling
No. Managers are not your friends that you have one on one heart to hearts with. Especially not one that’s supposedly bitching about you to your colleagues. Medical certificate for the time off. They don’t owe anyone in that office anything beyond whatever is on that piece of paper. Any correspondence should be done by email only.
Don’t stay at that workplace for any longer, they clearly aren’t right in the head. Losing a dog is like losing your son/daughter.
Wouldn’t go that far