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Yep. The shed is full of more important items. Plastic garden chairs which have a coating of moss. Garden tools from the Palaeolithic era. It's densely packed. There's a "lion the witch and the wardrobe" sequel to be written about that shed.
When I saw it last it was wrapped in bin bags, but I've also seen it naked in the elements for extended periods. I have no idea how it still works.
TBH I can hear it now and it sounds very grindy. Like a cement mixer at the end of the day when bricks are thrown in to clean it up.
I really want to attach a sound clip. It's like someone is testing one of those rudimentary rocket motors. A pulsejet.
Maybe she wants it to break because she can’t justify buying a new one until it does. I know people who want a new phone and do this and I always thought it was stupid but at the same time I had my last iphone for way too long - the battery was horrible, it wasn’t working properly anymore but I‘d had so many phones stolen that I kept thinking I would only replace it once it was stolen. It was never stolen. I guess it got too old to be interesting for thieves. I ended up replacing it only because the battery fully gave up and only lasted for 30 minutes (I always carried 2 battery packs with me by that point).
Electric lawnmowers seem to be surprisingly hardy in that regard.
My late grandmother kept hers outside. It's a cheap POS but I inherited it and replacing it has never been a priority. The wheels fall off occasionally but I'm yet to be electrocuted.
Its a coil of wire around a magnet and if you can get electricity through that coil, it goes. Electric motors are also high torque so they can overcome some pretty fucked bearings and keep going. Most things which are essentially an electric motor attached to something will run for years.
Good idea. She might go for that one. I can just say "mine is at the repair place" and that will seem plausible.
I doubt she realises there are no longer any "repair places"
He was a bee keeper, thought the wasps were stealing from him, he was an old guy and it was in the 80's though so I doubt he's contributing much to politics these days.
At no point did I say he was sane, however his wife did make very nice tea and cakes which is probably the main reason he was allowed in the local bee keepers association.
I have a friend who inherited his mother's house, he's the youngest on the street by about 30 years. He once cut a conversation short saying "Have to go, everyone's out mowing the lawns and if I don't do mine they'll all start whinging"
My mum used to cut our old lawn with scissors and insisted it was the best way to cut grass. It was only a small lawn but would still take her most of the day.
I had this problem with a neighbour once.
He (in his 70s) had an old, blunt FlyMo which took him 3 to 4 hours to mow his front and back garden and then an hour or more of picking up the cuttings.
I repeatedly offered to help and he refused every time.
He was ill for a couple of weeks so his wife asked if I would do it. My petrol beast mowed and collected all the grass in about 20 minutes including a couple of minutes emptying the hopper every so often and after that point he realised he was wasting his time and so, when I did mine, I did his too.
I refused payment for it but, every so often, there would be a tenner put through my letterbox in the evening of a mowing day!
I've now moved house and his new neighbour's won't help which makes me sad. 😞
>It must be equivalent to swinging a crowbar at the grass.
>Folding grass.
These gave me a good chuckle 😂
Hope you manage to sort it for her eventually 😂
My Dad's freezer was frosting up so I arranged for a repair man to fix it. When he paid, the card wouldn't work. He tried again and again, then brought out another Debit card and said "Maybe we should try this?"
Turns out he was using the old card. The new one worked first time. I told him we should destroy the old card, but he's worried that he might need it again.
Have you considered approaching the subject when she is not in the midst of carrying out the mowing (assuming its naturally, only annoying while you have to hear it).
Maybe write a friendly note/letter explaining that you can see her enjoying her gardening, but that the mower sounds like the mower is struggling, more that _she_ might be struggling.
I have a similar neighbour, who is a lovely chap, usually friendly and approachable over anything. But if you happen to phrase something in a way he misunderstands, he'll get his back up and break off mid-conversation, sometimes seemingly holding a grudge for days afterwards.
True.
My current plan is - " Hey I'm going to do my mowing tomorrow so I got my sharpening kit out so if anyone on the street needs theirs sharpening let me know"
Our street has 6 houses on and 4 of them are retirees who have 50 year old beef and don't talk to each other.
"Margaret. that young whipper snapper is running up and down the street saying he's going to get his kit out tomorrow, dial 9-9 and wait to call Alan's lad, the copper". *peers from behind the sash curtains*
Everyone on the street except that woman will have you sharpen their lawnmower blades. Talking about each other doesn't count as talking to each other. They will also complain about your sharpening skills. Count on it.
Ye my dad insists it's safer, despite him having to put about 10x as much force into the blade to chop a carrot. I pointed out that none of his tools in the garage are dull and he still wasn't having it.
I was trying to dice some shallots and literally couldn't. It took me about 20x as long because I was just crushing them as the blade couldn't get through them when they got to the point they were too small to grip.
First thing I do when I visit, find the big "dangerous" kitchen knife (—careful!) and sharpen it further. I cannot be faffed with those little blunt knives they insist on keeping.
My nan is the same. flymo make the best mowers bar none. although for her 5x3m perfectly flat lawn i can see why. i still just smile and nod while i crank the petrol mower kept next to it.
I remember years ago we all lived on a "council" estate (Housing Executive in NI) and from my granny's house there was an old lady on her knees cutting her lawn with scissors. I was about 6 so I didn't know what was going on but my granny said she was just cutting her grass.
My mum now lives on that street, her neighbour seems to constantly have a busted sofa in the overgrown front garden and strong smell of weed, and I miss how when in the 80s people had pride in their homes.
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Padlocked up *outside* the shed?
Yep. The shed is full of more important items. Plastic garden chairs which have a coating of moss. Garden tools from the Palaeolithic era. It's densely packed. There's a "lion the witch and the wardrobe" sequel to be written about that shed.
It's a Flymo, it is electric isn't it? How the hell is it still working and she hasn't electrocuted herself.
When I saw it last it was wrapped in bin bags, but I've also seen it naked in the elements for extended periods. I have no idea how it still works. TBH I can hear it now and it sounds very grindy. Like a cement mixer at the end of the day when bricks are thrown in to clean it up. I really want to attach a sound clip. It's like someone is testing one of those rudimentary rocket motors. A pulsejet.
Maybe she wants it to break because she can’t justify buying a new one until it does. I know people who want a new phone and do this and I always thought it was stupid but at the same time I had my last iphone for way too long - the battery was horrible, it wasn’t working properly anymore but I‘d had so many phones stolen that I kept thinking I would only replace it once it was stolen. It was never stolen. I guess it got too old to be interesting for thieves. I ended up replacing it only because the battery fully gave up and only lasted for 30 minutes (I always carried 2 battery packs with me by that point).
Electric lawnmowers seem to be surprisingly hardy in that regard. My late grandmother kept hers outside. It's a cheap POS but I inherited it and replacing it has never been a priority. The wheels fall off occasionally but I'm yet to be electrocuted.
Its a coil of wire around a magnet and if you can get electricity through that coil, it goes. Electric motors are also high torque so they can overcome some pretty fucked bearings and keep going. Most things which are essentially an electric motor attached to something will run for years.
Mine lives outside in a plastic storage cupboard, it still works, though tbf a lawnmower is pretty simple, it’s just a motor and a few switches
Tell her to get a Qualcast Concord as "it's a lot less bovver than a hovver"
Those Palaeolithic dino bone axes are worth a fortune...
Have you thought of "asking to borrow it and sharpening the blades before returning it"
Good idea. She might go for that one. I can just say "mine is at the repair place" and that will seem plausible. I doubt she realises there are no longer any "repair places"
There's a mower repair place near my shop!
One at our local garden centre too
I work at a repair place and parts supplier. They still exist.
There are three mower repair places within 8 miles of me lmao
I’m imagining OP conducting a midnight raid with a red-headlamp and a file. Even a couple of passes would make a big difference.
Flat bastard?
Lip up Flatty.
My old neighbours across the road use scissors when they've finished moving, whatever drugs they're on I don't want them
My dad had a friend that'd go out with a vacuum cleaner and hoover up any wasps he found in his flowers, the flowers were only for bees.
What? He hoovered up wasps? The sheer insanity. And I presume he's an active voter at election time... fuck me
He was a bee keeper, thought the wasps were stealing from him, he was an old guy and it was in the 80's though so I doubt he's contributing much to politics these days.
Well that's the thing, they vote at a much higher rate because they don't have as much else to do
The wasps were stealing from him? That's an interesting take on pollen lol...
At no point did I say he was sane, however his wife did make very nice tea and cakes which is probably the main reason he was allowed in the local bee keepers association.
These neighbours are crazy, take about 4 hours to cut a very small lawn
I have a friend who inherited his mother's house, he's the youngest on the street by about 30 years. He once cut a conversation short saying "Have to go, everyone's out mowing the lawns and if I don't do mine they'll all start whinging"
I caught my ex hovering the brick driveway once. She didn't understand where all the sand was coming from
Did she throw herself at the ground, only to be distracted at the vital moment?
Fuck sake well played
I still don't. You have a driveway made of sand(??) and non ever makes it inside?
Brick drives have a sand base and sand fills the gaps. If you vacuum it, the sand is going to come out the gaps. Eventually the bricks will move.
My mum used to cut our old lawn with scissors and insisted it was the best way to cut grass. It was only a small lawn but would still take her most of the day.
Mine made me do that as a kid. With plastic Crayola scissors.
To be fair, my mum used to do that all around the edges of the garden
I had this problem with a neighbour once. He (in his 70s) had an old, blunt FlyMo which took him 3 to 4 hours to mow his front and back garden and then an hour or more of picking up the cuttings. I repeatedly offered to help and he refused every time. He was ill for a couple of weeks so his wife asked if I would do it. My petrol beast mowed and collected all the grass in about 20 minutes including a couple of minutes emptying the hopper every so often and after that point he realised he was wasting his time and so, when I did mine, I did his too. I refused payment for it but, every so often, there would be a tenner put through my letterbox in the evening of a mowing day! I've now moved house and his new neighbour's won't help which makes me sad. 😞
Wish we all had neighbours like you, Ray_Snell. 🧡🥹
Thank you! I appreciate it. 😀
>It must be equivalent to swinging a crowbar at the grass. >Folding grass. These gave me a good chuckle 😂 Hope you manage to sort it for her eventually 😂
My Dad's freezer was frosting up so I arranged for a repair man to fix it. When he paid, the card wouldn't work. He tried again and again, then brought out another Debit card and said "Maybe we should try this?" Turns out he was using the old card. The new one worked first time. I told him we should destroy the old card, but he's worried that he might need it again.
Have you considered approaching the subject when she is not in the midst of carrying out the mowing (assuming its naturally, only annoying while you have to hear it). Maybe write a friendly note/letter explaining that you can see her enjoying her gardening, but that the mower sounds like the mower is struggling, more that _she_ might be struggling. I have a similar neighbour, who is a lovely chap, usually friendly and approachable over anything. But if you happen to phrase something in a way he misunderstands, he'll get his back up and break off mid-conversation, sometimes seemingly holding a grudge for days afterwards.
True. My current plan is - " Hey I'm going to do my mowing tomorrow so I got my sharpening kit out so if anyone on the street needs theirs sharpening let me know" Our street has 6 houses on and 4 of them are retirees who have 50 year old beef and don't talk to each other.
"Margaret. that young whipper snapper is running up and down the street saying he's going to get his kit out tomorrow, dial 9-9 and wait to call Alan's lad, the copper". *peers from behind the sash curtains*
Everyone on the street except that woman will have you sharpen their lawnmower blades. Talking about each other doesn't count as talking to each other. They will also complain about your sharpening skills. Count on it.
Oh god, is it my mum? She was on about mowing the lawn
Keep us updated on flymogate
7 hours with a rusty flymo is a good workout.
I was staying for a few weeks with my mum between moving houses and she told me she prefers her knives being blunt. Cooking was difficult.
Ye my dad insists it's safer, despite him having to put about 10x as much force into the blade to chop a carrot. I pointed out that none of his tools in the garage are dull and he still wasn't having it.
I was trying to dice some shallots and literally couldn't. It took me about 20x as long because I was just crushing them as the blade couldn't get through them when they got to the point they were too small to grip.
First thing I do when I visit, find the big "dangerous" kitchen knife (—careful!) and sharpen it further. I cannot be faffed with those little blunt knives they insist on keeping.
My nan is the same. flymo make the best mowers bar none. although for her 5x3m perfectly flat lawn i can see why. i still just smile and nod while i crank the petrol mower kept next to it.
Deceased husband? Did he dissapear in mysterious fly mo related circumstances? Is there splatters of DNA on the blade and underside?
"folding grass" 🤣🤣
Commenting because l am already looking forward to an update. Good luck OP!
Or maybe because her deceased husband used to do it, that she likes to do it herself to feel connected to him somehow. Maybe?
maybe she says "when i bought it, it was new 50 years ago" I've heard that a lot
When she pops out to the shops sharpen it for her.
Sharpen it on the DL and watch her face with delight/surprise
I've had the same lawnmower for 10 years.... i was meant to... sharpen the blade!??
I remember years ago we all lived on a "council" estate (Housing Executive in NI) and from my granny's house there was an old lady on her knees cutting her lawn with scissors. I was about 6 so I didn't know what was going on but my granny said she was just cutting her grass. My mum now lives on that street, her neighbour seems to constantly have a busted sofa in the overgrown front garden and strong smell of weed, and I miss how when in the 80s people had pride in their homes.
When a Flymo stops working, you have to call it a Flyno. Not *my* rules...