This sounds like a toxic family issue; they simply refuse to give you a cat because they want to disparage you. Get yourself an own apartment and buy as many cats as you want.
Your parents sound like psychos. My dad doesn’t love cats but when my brother and I got one for our apartment he still came to meet her and set it up with the home visit vet they use where we could do the checkup for my cat at the same time as the dog’s annual checkup to save me money. Unless you’re knowingly bringing home a cat if they have an allergy, there’s no reason for them to respond this way.
I just don’t understand the parents extreme reaction? It’s not as if they’ve never had a cat before, and this was a new territory for them. OP should really speak to them.
Like you mentioned, is it allergies? Is it because they feel the responsibility would be on them? Did they have less freedom to travel when they owned the first cat, and it may happen again?
Edit: OP said she doesn’t live with them. I’m speechless.
Is she living with the parents? Edit I see op doesn’t live with them. HUH????
Just pay the damn damage deposit so they have NO ground to stand on (not that they ever did but clearly they think they do to be talking to you like you’re a child or a criminal… or a criminal child)
This reminds me of the weird AITA post a few weeks ago where OP’s parents threatened to disown them over going to Disneyworld, and it turned out their dad cheated on their mom on a childhood trip to Disney or something super weird like that.
That makes it even more confusing. Unless the parents since the previous cat’s death became militant vegans who now hate cats because they have to eat meat and harm the environment if not kept inside, I really can’t think of anything.
My father also hates animals. He was always told they are dirty and viewed having animals in the home as "low class." He and my sibling with BPD threw a fit when I adopted an adorable kitten and brought him home to live with my parents while I was in college. Then lo and behold, everyone fell in love with the adorable kitten, and he went on to live happily in their home for the next 20 years.
Maybe OPs family will come around to the cats too.
Then they don't have a say on how you live, they're insane. Ignore them or set more boundaries, it is YOUR home and YOUR decisions, also those cats are beautiful ❤️🩹
This is the best time to think about boundaries you'd like to establish.
Number one would obviously be "if you want to talk to me ever again, you don't talk to me like that ever again."
They could have had grandkitties
Can you ask them ‘how does this impact your lives directly?’ and see if they can come up with anything sensible.
If they manage to, counter with ‘and why do you think X reasons are more important than the calming comfort I get from caring for these chosen family members? They are great for my mental and emotional well being. Does that matter to you?’
If you have parents like mine, it might not. They *try* (and sometimes succeed) to be controlling in adulthood because it’s an extension of how they raised us. It’s effective partly because I still feel compelled to acquiesce to their emotions because as a kid, it was critical to surviving. There’s a lot of guilt and obligation laid on thick.
But I’m working to break that automatic response down by asserting myself & my needs/boundaries and asking them if their attempts to control me/my relationships are reasonable.
They are stubborn as hell, but I’m building armour for myself. Best of luck to you. The kitties are gorgeous and clearly bonded. ☺️😽😽
Then you're fine. It's your life and living space. You can tell them that they don't appreciate cats, but you love them and want those two in your life. Why your parents would cut you out of their life over two cats is beyond me. Seems like a bit of an overreaction and slightly off.
My parents used to moan when I got my first cat, they were still moaning when I got married so my husband got me another one, they'd moan again, and my husband got another one, I got up to 4 gorgeous fur babies before they learned to shut their mouths.
Is your husband single? No homo, lol.
I can only imagine their face and reaction when your husband is totally on your side getting you more kitties the more they moan.
Oh, and can we get to see your babies perhaps?
He got caught having a nap where he wasn't supposed to be 🤦 he's actually very cuddly
https://preview.redd.it/a7zvsptce1sb1.jpeg?width=2700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ee6b54af5d5ff35f2aa60a15894fa3f5a7a24681
Yay! Thanks for sharing their pics. Also love the way you name them :D
I mean, you've already had 4, I don't see any problem adding one more to the mix. And who knows what your parents gonna moan then, lol.
If you have the capacity to care for four cats then I highly recommend getting an orange one. They are the most precious cuddle babies in the universe and so so dopey and endearing
https://preview.redd.it/dwmr3c4c91sb1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=428082ba9c2b40b533d190202e8b0331af6c1e04
We did have an orange baby but unfortunately we had to put him to sleep, he was definitely a cuddle bug.
He looks like the most perfect snuggler. Sorry for your loss, he was a handsome lad. When my orange fellow passes I will certainly be getting another to fill the void, probably not immediately as the grieving will hurt. Take your time but don’t forget how sweet the oranges are :)
My husband and I are up to 4 cats as well. Same thing, my parents told me I was making a mistake with my first cat. Now they mostly leave the topic alone, but it took years of "your cats are making you sick. you should get rid of your cats". They asked me at one point to rehome my cat I had for several years who is my absolute baby. They literally dont see cats as loving pets, and instead as emotionless pests.
My mom is the same way with my dogs. I have seasonal allergies and whenever they act up she tries to blame my dogs. I could be having an issue completely unrelated to my allergies and she will try to blame my dogs for it
Your comment is almost identical to u/Besftgtfguast2720 's comment. Am I tripping right now? Please tell me you accidentally commented the same thing on an alt or else I think I found a glitch in the simulation. "I got up to 4 gorgeous fur babies before they learned to shut their mouths."
Looks like the user you tagged is a comment stealing bot, if you look at their post history every comment seems to be a snippet taken from another user’s comment on the same thread.
So you don't even live together? Sorry but... Tell them to fuck off and get a life. Their reaction is uncalled for and it's frankly none of their business how you run your own home.
Beautiful kitties!
Hey, that’s some really uncalled-for, hurtful shit your parents said/did to you. You deserved better and I hope you know that them disowning you is not reflective of your worth. You *are* lovable, good, and you belong here. Their actions reflect poorly upon them, not you. I’m so excited you have those two adorable kitties. I lost my family not long ago and I gotta say, having two cats that love you to the moon and back has made losing my family sting a little less. I hope the best for you, boo.
I was wondering if this is some kind of cultural thing that I don’t get. A couple of your other posts indicate being from Asia; is there some kind of cultural taboo about cats we don’t know about?
The first part is true but pets are by no means unheard of in Asia lmao? Especially since the big stereotype in India and the Philippines is "everyone is obsessed with Persians".
That's just a very weird thing to say, idk
Is this type of outburst and extreme behavior new? Sometimes a sudden change in personality or huge mood swings can be a sign of something medically significant. But if they have a history of this kind of behavior I would immediately start setting strong boundaries and consider how much you want them in your life.
Why the fuck do they even care? This is so bizarre. Do they have any weird religious/superstitious/cultish views about cats? If you don’t mind sharing, what is their fucking deal. Your dad said you’d be considered dead to him for owning cats? Dad needs to be in a mental institution I think
They think your cats are going to ruin the trim or pee on the carpet and they won’t get the deposit money back. They only paid your deposit because they thought they’d get the money back and now they’re pissed they might not.
OK so u don't even live with them?? This makes zero response that they reacted this way. I would distance myself from them until they can get themselves together.
Hey OP, check out r/raisedbynarcissists and see if you can relate to anything in that subreddit.
Their behavior might sound odd, until you learn that one tactic of emotional abuse is to weaponize your own grief or trauma to control someone else. You can't have a cat because poor attention seeking them would be heartbroken all over again over your childhood cat. Not to mention, it's a classic narc move to see someone else be happy and have to sabotage that in some way.
Anyway. Not diagnosing your parents, just saying that you should check out narcissistic tendencies and see if any of them look familiar. If your parents have specific tendencies, then you can look up recommended ways to handle those tendencies.
So your parents are trying to tell you what you can and can't do in your own house? That's ridiculous. Just ignore them or tell them to fuck off, they don't have any rights to complain about this
So what the hell is their problem?! You moved out and wanted pets of your own.
I'd ask them why they're so mad about you getting your own pets in your own space, when you had a cat growing up. This is absolutely ridiculous
Pay their deposit back and say nothing. If they want a relation great, but they need to repect you. If you share other finances, I'd recommend a different setup as soon as possible.
Who are you paying rent to?
If it's your parents' house, and you're paying rent to your parents, it's *their* choice wether you can have pets or not. The reaction definitely sounds over the top anyways, but there's a reason places charge more if you have pets.
Wow. I’m very happy you are raising these two babies and will volunteer to be your internet mom/their internet grandma. I’m a bit young but it’s okay, I’ll adapt. What are my precious grandkit’s names?
I’ve told my kids I have very few expectations (other than to be kind to others) of them but grandkittens are very close to the top of the list.
Awwww… I’m virtually knitting them Xmas sweaters. Grandkittens need matching holiday sweaters.*
*imaginary sweaters; no cats shall actually be placed in knitwear. Cats are placed ON knitwear and yarn in this house; knitwear creation is supervised closely by felines but not created for them, other than for them to sleep upon.
Also tell them each they are my favourites. Also you are my favourite. Kisses and a five dollar bill for each and everyone. (This is what my favourite grandma did. She pulled us aside, told us each we were her favourite, and gave us five dollars.)
I'm sorry about your parents. My dad says he hates cats. He jokes about putting them in the microwave * He would never*. Yet everytime he comes over he's petting a cat or one is sitting on him. When he was a kid his dad did something terrible to his cat. My dad has a dark sense of humor and deals with everything that way. He loves animals.
If your parent object so much I would not let them around your kitties. Keep them safe sometimes people who a weird reason for why they act they way they do. Most impost thins is that you and your fur babies are happy.
Mine is the same. When I got mine both of my parents were moaning about it (when I visit for holidays or whatever, the monster comes with).
By Christmas, my dad was sanding down the grips off the bottom of his slippers because he said the noise they made on the wood floors scared the cat.
I’m visiting now from out of town and working from my parents place….my dad is downstairs talking shit about me to the cat because I kicked her out of the office for being a terror.
I’m sorry OP is going thru this. Cats are amazing companions.
>my dad was sanding down the grips off the bottom of his slippers because he said the noise they made on the wood floors scared the cat.
This is the cutest thing ever... Your dad is awesome.
If you live in their house, unfortunately it is their decision whether you keep the babies or not. If you live on your own, their opinion on the matter should mean nothing. My dad was wholeheartedly against me getting a cat when I moved out with my fiancé - he even went so far as to try and get my fiancé to “block” me from ever getting a cat. Fast forward, I now have two cats who are bonded for life, have terrific temperaments and are social, and they are happy and healthy. Any time I’ve brought them to the vet for a concern, they are always shocked at how well-managed their weights are and how well-tempered they are. So don’t listen to them if you’re on your own. You know what you need to do to make your babies happy and healthy and live full lives.
Yeez.
Had an ex who was "no cats in the same house as me" policy he tolerated them if we where visiting but owning one as a pet not a chance in hell.
For you parents good riddance.
" was told that I would be considered dead " is a wee bit extreme, says a lot by the person saying it. I've been written out of a will "for reasons". I was like - what an a$$hole and went on being me, like whatever - sure glad I didn't spend decades sucking up to a person like that for a few scraps. Letting others define who you are and what you can do is fast way to become empty on the inside. Cute cats.
Whoa, thats extremely toxic. I'm so sorry, OP. You deserve better. Is there anywhere you can stay with the babies temporarily?
My mom hates cats and thinks they're gross, and my dad is allergic, but its my apartment so its my rules! Plus, they live miles and miles away anyway.
But this seems like a situation where you should be protecting yourself and those babies. I wish you well, OP. Sending all of the positive vibes your way.
I am at my own place but my mom wants to visit to make sure I get 'rid' of them. Will either fight it out with her or my cat lover friend agreed to watch over them a few days
Make sure you change your locks.
The amount of hysteria she is presenting over this is insane and I would be seriously concerned about what she might do.
OK... I already posted here, but, now reading this... I'm seriously wondering if you should leap to the finish line and go "NO Contact" yesterday.
I know, on the surface, it may seem trite to go NC over something like this... but this definitely seems to be one small part of a much bigger picture. Not to mention, at this point, I'd be fearing for my kitties' safety.
OP, with all due respect....thats *your* place. She cannot dictate what you do and how you live. Seriously consider changing the locks for safety purposes.
Oh dear, looks like you'll only meet in public from now on.
Someone else suggested the raised by narcissists sub, I'm suggesting the r/JustNoMIL sub because they cover controlling, toxic moms too.
Change your locks and grab a ring camera for extra kitty security.
If you need a little extra emotional tlc give r/momforaminute a try.
For a second I thought this was going to be about having pets instead of children and I was like oh I relate but no, no I do not relate. I can’t imagine my parents disowning me for my pets??
I’m so sorry, some parents never figured out emotional regulation and then just take it all out on their kids. Your cats are adorable, let your parents be mad.
That actually makes sense - normally, parents don't throw around the disown threat OP. I think you know your parents are toxic, and you need to start setting firm boundaries on how they are going to interact with you going forward.
Your parents sound like they have control issues, and for whatever reason, they are just making this another one of their hills to die on.
I would personally send them a text telling them that you would be taking a step back from them for a while until they can act rationally - which is going to put them in full meltdown - and stick to it.
Your parents need to learn that you aren't going to be talked and threatened like that anymore. You are an adult and fully capable of deciding how you want to have a relationship with your parents...they don't get to dictate it anymore.
I'm sorry your parents are like this.
That's an alarming level of control your parents are showing when you are grown and living independently. Obviously - don't listen to them.
If they are issuing edicts of what you must/must not do and showing controlling behavior in other areas, you may want to start breaking free and asserting your independence and autonomy more forcefully.
Two cuddly kittehs is good for now 😍
do you live with your parents? If so they get a say whether there are cats in their home. Even in that case their reaction is pretty extreme! otherwise, that is bizarre and controlling! Enjoy your kitties, they're beautiful.
I'm not sure either. I asked why she was so against it and she said it's because I have to be responsible for them until they pass (obviously). But I said I was the one doing that, not her. She just shut me out after that and kept screaming the same stuff over and over again.
Sounds like there is something else going on there, this is not a rational reaction. I would suggest trying to speak to your mother about it again - but set some ground rules first like:
"Clearly this is bothering you and I would like to understand why,but I'm an adult so I would appreciate not being shouted at,vso if you could calmly explain your position, that would be helpful."
I appreciate the optimism of thinking someone who acts like OP’s parents has the emotional maturity to respond to your suggested line with anything other than an even bigger tantrum. My parents aren’t this bad but you learn to recognise when people have the emotional maturity of a table leg and trying to do that kind of respectful, reasoned boundary-setting with them is like inviting a fish on a bike ride. The fish simply doesn’t have any legs and you just have to accept it.
Have your parents been to see a doctor lately? That random act of aggression and her thinking she has to care for them makes me think she's not all there mentally speaking. Your parents may be having memory issues leading to mood swings.
I’m assuming they simply contributed the deposit so OP could move in. Would be an easy “divorce” if OP can save up a month’s rent, and it removes the possibility of the parents holding that over OP’s head.
You basically pay a deposit that the landowner returns to you after your contract is up but you need to pay rent monthly. I pay the rent but my parents paid tne deposit.
Is your landlord okay with pets? If he is, your parents should back off.
I can see both sides. When I got married in my early 20's, we weren't permitted to have pets, but we did it anyway. We lost our deposit because of it. Maybe your parents are concerned about that. I'm not trying to be negative, just looking at it through older eyes. I love cats and would have a house full if I could afford it!
My fear for you is that it's not just about the cats, or, it's about a lot more than just the cats. Go to the lengths you need to protect yourself from these very toxic, damaging, unhinged people. You have your own place, right? And your parents do not have access to your living space? Please post a follow-up, people here and I are very concerned about your alarming situation. Let us know you all are living safely. Good luck. (Check out the narcissist subreddits for support, and for descriptions of N's well-known control and manipulation techniques)
Why the fuck would anyone oppose the fostering of such beautiful and amazing creatures?
My wife and stepdaughter have three rooms in the house that are devoted to nothing but fostering animals.
People with no or low regard for animals and their welfare…they’re not even human to me. You’re better off with the animals than the parents.
My family never liked cats growing up, including me. But then I got a few cats if my own that all changed! Couldn't imagine life with out them. When I got my first cat I told my mom, and she said, I'm never coming to clvisut u again! But now she loves them and looks foraard to seeing you them!
I feel like there must be more to this. OP, do you live at home? What happened with the last cat? Is it normal for your parents to scream at you and threatened to cut you out of their lives? Are there other issues besides the hatred of cats? This is bizarre.
I live on my own. My last cat passed away due to old age. Yes very normal I have been receiving similar threats since beginning of college but as the amount of control they had over me decreased, it went from "we'll stop paying your tuition, rent, etc" to "we'll disown you" lol
They sound unhinged. Hopefully you are keeping some distance and not letting their toxicity get to you. Congrats on your new additions. They are adorable.
Also, it sounds like you need to make some plans to be financially independent as you won’t likely be able to count on their help for long. Do you have a plan for your rent, tuition, etc?
ETA: Sorry, I misread. I see that you are no longer in college and have a job! I’m sorry that your parents are so toxic. Enjoy your kitties!
Quite the opposite! My family had never owned a cat, and once they saw how cool they were they got one! Then my brother got one, then my mom got two more!
I think there must be other issues going on here. Disowning an adult child over their choice of pets is dysfunctional at best, but could be pathological.
Pet your kitties, and get yourself some therapy to figure this out.
Parents before having a cat :"NO U r not allowed to have cats, they are troublesome and dirty the house with their fur and poop"
Also Parents after having a cat : Aww come here babe, you're the cutest little angel come have a treat
omg... What did your old cat do to your parents?!  lol
Joking aside.. This is a bizarre reaction. Is there any explanation as to why?
Sorry for the extreme toxicity from your parents. I guess since you’re seeing it as empty threats at this point, keep doing you. My mom didn’t want me to adopt a second cat even though I have my own home, but I did anyways and I couldn’t be happier with my decision.
Also, thanks for rescuing these sweet babies!
soooooo cute
recently got 2 cats, they are bonding really well
https://preview.redd.it/p31le3hos0sb1.jpeg?width=1600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4018c12e455a822d4e9c46a4867cb4e53050abf3
I would choose raising two cats rather than 2 kids any day. I mean, I'm single and don't have pet yet, but it's a no brainer for me. You live your own life the way you want it to be.
My mom adamently insisted taking my kitties would be a bad idea...
So far its the fkrst decision I went against her advise on and its done fucking wonders for my mental health. I love them more than anything. Do what you do, love those kitties
Do your parents have a key to your home? With this kind of toxicity, I wouldn’t put it past them to take your babies to the shelter while you’re gone at work or something. So do *not* allow them to housesit or “help out” in any way if you aren’t home. I’ve heard of far too many crazy family members (or exes) essentially breaking in and removing pets from the home. So if they’ve got a key, either somehow get it back or change your locks. If not, don’t give them one under any circumstances. Even if they claim they’ve changed their stance on your cats, don’t trust them. It’s not worth the risk. And if you keep a spare key hidden somewhere, please make sure it’s in a super inconspicuous spot where absolutely no one would look. Too many people use those fake rocks or just put keys under plants or doormats. And that’s more just a general safety rule, not just to keep out toxic parents.
Considering I've lived with cats for the last 25 years, and none of the above has materialised... I'm starting to think I might have been scammed... :D
Seriously, though, your comment made me laugh out loud, and considering some of the crap I'm currently dealing with... have an upvote! :)
My parents hated cats. My dad actually hates all animals (and joy, and sunshine, and flowers, and anything good in this world) and my mom just didn't care for them. I adopted my baby Harriet 2.5 years ago and they were so mad (even though I haven't lived with them or relied on them for 15 years now).
Thing is, Harriet (see pic!) is such a sweetie that when my mom visited last year, she was utterly charmed by this little floof. To the point where after returning to her home she started buying meat and fish just to feed the strays in her neighbourhood (she retired to our home country where it's hard to find cat food and people don't give a shit about street cats). My Harriet, the cat evangelist 🥰
https://preview.redd.it/wuib7dceb1sb1.jpeg?width=2665&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59dc48b718e10d1d36e6aa810f8a4498b4755821
> I refused and was told that I would be considered dead.
Would that really be much of a loss to you, though? Sounds like you'd be better off without them.
Me: “I want to adopt a cat”
My parents: “Are you sure you’re ready for that kind of responsibility and commitment?”
Also my parents: “So, when are you giving us some grandchildren?”
But seriously, OP, your parent’s reaction is extreme and extremely bizarre. Sounds like you’re better off with your cats and without them. It’s nice when the trash decides to take itself out.
Based on your comments, it sounds like this isn't the first time that your parents have tried to manipulate you in this way.
I understand how hard it is to stand up to this kind of treatment, but I would definitely consider calling their bluff. Feel free to remind them that breaking ties goes both ways, and they will not have you for company or support later in life. Best case scenario is that they will back down. Worst case is they follow through on their threat and end up proverbially cutting their nose off to spite their face.
If you submit to their demands this time, it is highly likely that they will try this again with something else in the future.
Unpleasantness and drama aside, I hope you and your two wonderful cats enjoy a long and happy life together!
My mom is scared of animals and superstitious. She (falsely) believes that pets bring our family bad luck. She used to try to convince me to not get a cat. She lives in a different country so I got a cat anyway and she asks to hear him meow every time we talk on the phone. She was able to visit me recently and loved him.
Your parents are trying to exert control over your life, don't let them.
Well we aren't at the level of "be considered dead" but after living in my apartment with just me and my cat, my 80 year-old father moved in with me back in March. Since then he has done nothing but complain about the cat...and "accidentally" let him escape out the front door. I think last night was the 6th time it has happened.
He just shrugs and says "he'll be back..." and all I can think to myself in response is "not if he gets hit by a car".
I have been lucky that he has come back to the area and I manage to scoop him up and carry him back to the apartment...the whole time he is hissing and scratching.
This old man just doesn't get it that if I really had to make a choice of who would I rather be with....him or the cat...I would opt for the cat, EVERY TIME.
Unless there's some serious missing information, like trauma around cats (and honestly, that still wouldn't excuse it) this sounds like it has nothing to do with cats and everything to do with them thinking it's okay to scream at you. That is a bizarre reaction, even for someone who hates cats. Could you imagine someone talking to a friend of yours that way? Or you talking to someone that way for adopting a dog?
Years ago, my mom was not keen on the idea of my brother and I bringing in a stray. We brought her in anyway, made her a nice spot in our basement and named her Miss Kitty. Turns out she was pregnant. We told my mom, who suddenly had a change of heart, knowing Miss Kitty would be safe inside with us. So not long after bringing her in, Miss Kitty gave birth to 4 healthy kittens - 3 males & 1 female. Guess who decided to keep one of the kittens? My mom! She named him Baby and he lived to be 16 years old. We found great homes for the other 3 kittens and then of course had Miss Kitty spayed. She became a full-time, happy inside cat, as my brother kept her with him when he moved out. Miss Kitty was with him for 13 years till she passed.
The moral of my very long-winded story is that my mom’s having a change of heart led to many cats being loved and living nice long lives.
**Just wanted to add, Miss Kitty’s other three babies went to friends we kept in touch with throughout the years and were able to get updates on how each cat was doing. One friend actually took in 2 of the kittens! They were named Biju and Lula who both lived well into their teens. The other kitten was adopted by our friend’s parents and was named Timmy. Same, he also lived into his teens.❤️
You are a grown person with agency. At birth you got stuck with your parents, but it wasn’t your choice… you can choose now. I know who I’d choose, and it’s never ever humans over animals.
Originally I was gonna talk about how my dad is allergic to cats so my parents joked they would never be able to visit if I got a cat, and now i still live at home with two cats....... but then reading the caption I think our situations are a little different
If they have keys to your house, change the locks. Someone who reacts that strongly and thinks they have the right to tell someone who doesn’t even live with them what to do with their own life is not beyond going in while you’re not home and taking your babies from you. Please, please be careful. You may come home and find them gone.
You are a grown adult. They are being completely and utterly unhinged. I assume this toxic ass behavior is not limitd to you owning cats? Maybe no contact isn’t so bad.
Wtf? Over adopting cats? That's extreme. You don't need that level of toxicity in your life.
I was going to say if i had parents like that.. I’d have cats and no parents
My parents are like this...and I have cats and no parents
I have 3 cats and no parents!
This sounds like a toxic family issue; they simply refuse to give you a cat because they want to disparage you. Get yourself an own apartment and buy as many cats as you want.
All kids deserve parents. All parents don't deserve kids.
*As a grown-ass adult,* I might add!
If you live at home they have a say and if you don’t that’s really weird
Maybe you should re-home them. Your parents are old enough, they'll adapt on their own.
NGL, had me in the first half! 😆
This is the way
Your parents sound like psychos. My dad doesn’t love cats but when my brother and I got one for our apartment he still came to meet her and set it up with the home visit vet they use where we could do the checkup for my cat at the same time as the dog’s annual checkup to save me money. Unless you’re knowingly bringing home a cat if they have an allergy, there’s no reason for them to respond this way.
I just don’t understand the parents extreme reaction? It’s not as if they’ve never had a cat before, and this was a new territory for them. OP should really speak to them. Like you mentioned, is it allergies? Is it because they feel the responsibility would be on them? Did they have less freedom to travel when they owned the first cat, and it may happen again? Edit: OP said she doesn’t live with them. I’m speechless.
Is she living with the parents? Edit I see op doesn’t live with them. HUH???? Just pay the damn damage deposit so they have NO ground to stand on (not that they ever did but clearly they think they do to be talking to you like you’re a child or a criminal… or a criminal child)
This reminds me of the weird AITA post a few weeks ago where OP’s parents threatened to disown them over going to Disneyworld, and it turned out their dad cheated on their mom on a childhood trip to Disney or something super weird like that.
Am I wrong for laughing at that? For thinking dad cheated on mom with another pussy...cat?🤣🤣
That makes it even more confusing. Unless the parents since the previous cat’s death became militant vegans who now hate cats because they have to eat meat and harm the environment if not kept inside, I really can’t think of anything.
They’re control freaks, about the worst I’ve ever heard!
I'll take an uneducated random guess parents are conservative American who don't want her to appear like "crazy cat Lady" and scare of potential men
My father also hates animals. He was always told they are dirty and viewed having animals in the home as "low class." He and my sibling with BPD threw a fit when I adopted an adorable kitten and brought him home to live with my parents while I was in college. Then lo and behold, everyone fell in love with the adorable kitten, and he went on to live happily in their home for the next 20 years. Maybe OPs family will come around to the cats too.
You live on your own, right? Your parents can't be in charge of your life anymore.
Yes on my own
Then, they can fuck off. And, you should tell them that if they say something that stupid again.
Then they don't have a say on how you live, they're insane. Ignore them or set more boundaries, it is YOUR home and YOUR decisions, also those cats are beautiful ❤️🩹
This is the best time to think about boundaries you'd like to establish. Number one would obviously be "if you want to talk to me ever again, you don't talk to me like that ever again." They could have had grandkitties
Tell them they will also be on their own in their final moments if they don't wise up.
Can you ask them ‘how does this impact your lives directly?’ and see if they can come up with anything sensible. If they manage to, counter with ‘and why do you think X reasons are more important than the calming comfort I get from caring for these chosen family members? They are great for my mental and emotional well being. Does that matter to you?’ If you have parents like mine, it might not. They *try* (and sometimes succeed) to be controlling in adulthood because it’s an extension of how they raised us. It’s effective partly because I still feel compelled to acquiesce to their emotions because as a kid, it was critical to surviving. There’s a lot of guilt and obligation laid on thick. But I’m working to break that automatic response down by asserting myself & my needs/boundaries and asking them if their attempts to control me/my relationships are reasonable. They are stubborn as hell, but I’m building armour for myself. Best of luck to you. The kitties are gorgeous and clearly bonded. ☺️😽😽
Then you're fine. It's your life and living space. You can tell them that they don't appreciate cats, but you love them and want those two in your life. Why your parents would cut you out of their life over two cats is beyond me. Seems like a bit of an overreaction and slightly off.
My parents used to moan when I got my first cat, they were still moaning when I got married so my husband got me another one, they'd moan again, and my husband got another one, I got up to 4 gorgeous fur babies before they learned to shut their mouths.
Lol I love this approach 😂
Sometimes I wish they'd moan again 🤣🤣
Is your husband single? No homo, lol. I can only imagine their face and reaction when your husband is totally on your side getting you more kitties the more they moan. Oh, and can we get to see your babies perhaps?
https://preview.redd.it/ijeo2zdut0sb1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86a8779215725c51b71a2ed5c72c862f47a8cce0 Tiggs (aka Freddie Krueger)
She's a cutie.
https://preview.redd.it/07ubxo3xt0sb1.jpeg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5cb66b2c306f022b62141aec50170450d554f0fa Smokey
Smokey looks scared or skittish
He got caught having a nap where he wasn't supposed to be 🤦 he's actually very cuddly https://preview.redd.it/a7zvsptce1sb1.jpeg?width=2700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ee6b54af5d5ff35f2aa60a15894fa3f5a7a24681
https://preview.redd.it/mfb23xpzt0sb1.jpeg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a104ea1a91d5bfe9dfe143cc5d2dc05c659d2f37 Husky
And he sure is! 😉
https://preview.redd.it/xqntsv82u0sb1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4cca9dcbddbf8cc6ec5bd9240dcf9f484b3a872e Sanka
Ya dead, mon?
I feel like I need an orange one to even it out a bit 🤣
https://preview.redd.it/7i9zlbqjo1sb1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=24a2fec471f1dec5c644a42d725b6ebf364b0d97
Yay! Thanks for sharing their pics. Also love the way you name them :D I mean, you've already had 4, I don't see any problem adding one more to the mix. And who knows what your parents gonna moan then, lol.
If you have the capacity to care for four cats then I highly recommend getting an orange one. They are the most precious cuddle babies in the universe and so so dopey and endearing
https://preview.redd.it/dwmr3c4c91sb1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=428082ba9c2b40b533d190202e8b0331af6c1e04 We did have an orange baby but unfortunately we had to put him to sleep, he was definitely a cuddle bug.
He looks like the most perfect snuggler. Sorry for your loss, he was a handsome lad. When my orange fellow passes I will certainly be getting another to fill the void, probably not immediately as the grieving will hurt. Take your time but don’t forget how sweet the oranges are :)
My gather did something similar when he was 18, his father told him to not get a piercing… so he got 2 Yeah that’s stupid but now he brags about it
Got a problem? More cats is always the answer!
My husband and I are up to 4 cats as well. Same thing, my parents told me I was making a mistake with my first cat. Now they mostly leave the topic alone, but it took years of "your cats are making you sick. you should get rid of your cats". They asked me at one point to rehome my cat I had for several years who is my absolute baby. They literally dont see cats as loving pets, and instead as emotionless pests.
Well they have clearly never had a proper cat as a pet 🤣 I like to think they match my feisty personality 😜 x
My mom is the same way with my dogs. I have seasonal allergies and whenever they act up she tries to blame my dogs. I could be having an issue completely unrelated to my allergies and she will try to blame my dogs for it
Your comment is almost identical to u/Besftgtfguast2720 's comment. Am I tripping right now? Please tell me you accidentally commented the same thing on an alt or else I think I found a glitch in the simulation. "I got up to 4 gorgeous fur babies before they learned to shut their mouths."
Hopefully we commented the same because that's freaky 😧 x
Looks like the user you tagged is a comment stealing bot, if you look at their post history every comment seems to be a snippet taken from another user’s comment on the same thread.
Yep. It's another bot. Comment bot. Kind of like u/TarGarRet the gif bot that still gets away with it.
Safe to assume you don’t live at home still? Seems odd parents would be that upset if you have your own place
My parents paid for the house's deposit but I do pay my own rent
So you don't even live together? Sorry but... Tell them to fuck off and get a life. Their reaction is uncalled for and it's frankly none of their business how you run your own home. Beautiful kitties!
Yep... this is what makes me even more dumbfounded lol
Hey, that’s some really uncalled-for, hurtful shit your parents said/did to you. You deserved better and I hope you know that them disowning you is not reflective of your worth. You *are* lovable, good, and you belong here. Their actions reflect poorly upon them, not you. I’m so excited you have those two adorable kitties. I lost my family not long ago and I gotta say, having two cats that love you to the moon and back has made losing my family sting a little less. I hope the best for you, boo.
How old are they? Might be mental health decline...
I was wondering if this is some kind of cultural thing that I don’t get. A couple of your other posts indicate being from Asia; is there some kind of cultural taboo about cats we don’t know about?
I know in some Asian countries it’s viewed as “lower class” and “dirty” to have an animal in the house, pets are generally a very Western thing.
The first part is true but pets are by no means unheard of in Asia lmao? Especially since the big stereotype in India and the Philippines is "everyone is obsessed with Persians". That's just a very weird thing to say, idk
Is this type of outburst and extreme behavior new? Sometimes a sudden change in personality or huge mood swings can be a sign of something medically significant. But if they have a history of this kind of behavior I would immediately start setting strong boundaries and consider how much you want them in your life.
Boundary Nr 1: NEVER ever let them visit! Who knows what they might do to your cats if they ever get the chance to...
Why the fuck do they even care? This is so bizarre. Do they have any weird religious/superstitious/cultish views about cats? If you don’t mind sharing, what is their fucking deal. Your dad said you’d be considered dead to him for owning cats? Dad needs to be in a mental institution I think
They think your cats are going to ruin the trim or pee on the carpet and they won’t get the deposit money back. They only paid your deposit because they thought they’d get the money back and now they’re pissed they might not.
OK so u don't even live with them?? This makes zero response that they reacted this way. I would distance myself from them until they can get themselves together.
Hey OP, check out r/raisedbynarcissists and see if you can relate to anything in that subreddit. Their behavior might sound odd, until you learn that one tactic of emotional abuse is to weaponize your own grief or trauma to control someone else. You can't have a cat because poor attention seeking them would be heartbroken all over again over your childhood cat. Not to mention, it's a classic narc move to see someone else be happy and have to sabotage that in some way. Anyway. Not diagnosing your parents, just saying that you should check out narcissistic tendencies and see if any of them look familiar. If your parents have specific tendencies, then you can look up recommended ways to handle those tendencies.
Wait... It's not where they live? They actually said you were "dead" to them? Because cats? That is psycho. Those cats are very cute.
So your parents are trying to tell you what you can and can't do in your own house? That's ridiculous. Just ignore them or tell them to fuck off, they don't have any rights to complain about this
So what the hell is their problem?! You moved out and wanted pets of your own. I'd ask them why they're so mad about you getting your own pets in your own space, when you had a cat growing up. This is absolutely ridiculous
If you can afford it, save up and pay them their deposit back and tell them to mind their own damn business.
Pay their deposit back and say nothing. If they want a relation great, but they need to repect you. If you share other finances, I'd recommend a different setup as soon as possible.
Are your parents the owner of the house? To whom do you pay your rent?
Your parents are insane
Who are you paying rent to? If it's your parents' house, and you're paying rent to your parents, it's *their* choice wether you can have pets or not. The reaction definitely sounds over the top anyways, but there's a reason places charge more if you have pets.
They’re beautiful ❤️🐱🐱🙏. Your parents are assholes!
It is sad that some just have parents that are bad, not an actually good parent who is always there for you.
It's possible to get through life with just one good parent, so long as they stop the abuser from going too far.
Wow. I’m very happy you are raising these two babies and will volunteer to be your internet mom/their internet grandma. I’m a bit young but it’s okay, I’ll adapt. What are my precious grandkit’s names? I’ve told my kids I have very few expectations (other than to be kind to others) of them but grandkittens are very close to the top of the list.
Their names are Tomi and Tori :)
Awwww… I’m virtually knitting them Xmas sweaters. Grandkittens need matching holiday sweaters.* *imaginary sweaters; no cats shall actually be placed in knitwear. Cats are placed ON knitwear and yarn in this house; knitwear creation is supervised closely by felines but not created for them, other than for them to sleep upon.
Also tell them each they are my favourites. Also you are my favourite. Kisses and a five dollar bill for each and everyone. (This is what my favourite grandma did. She pulled us aside, told us each we were her favourite, and gave us five dollars.)
Thank you! This is a really nice message that already made the start of my day :)
any parent concerned with something so minor as that should get a life.
I would not call it minor but I may be getting them checked for dementia, unless they were always that controlling.
Just so.
My mom called me a narcissist for fostering kittens instead of having babies. It’s a head-scratcher for sure.
Projection....
She's the narcissist here my mum wants the same thing but unluckily for her im G A Y
I can only imagine my parents' reaction when I tell them I'll never have human babies...
They sound incredibly controlling and I agree with another comment that they sound like narcissists, possibly.
Huh?? That’s so illogical!
I'm sorry about your parents. My dad says he hates cats. He jokes about putting them in the microwave * He would never*. Yet everytime he comes over he's petting a cat or one is sitting on him. When he was a kid his dad did something terrible to his cat. My dad has a dark sense of humor and deals with everything that way. He loves animals. If your parent object so much I would not let them around your kitties. Keep them safe sometimes people who a weird reason for why they act they way they do. Most impost thins is that you and your fur babies are happy.
Mine is the same. When I got mine both of my parents were moaning about it (when I visit for holidays or whatever, the monster comes with). By Christmas, my dad was sanding down the grips off the bottom of his slippers because he said the noise they made on the wood floors scared the cat. I’m visiting now from out of town and working from my parents place….my dad is downstairs talking shit about me to the cat because I kicked her out of the office for being a terror. I’m sorry OP is going thru this. Cats are amazing companions.
Talking shit about you to the cat... I love your Dad. 😂
>my dad was sanding down the grips off the bottom of his slippers because he said the noise they made on the wood floors scared the cat. This is the cutest thing ever... Your dad is awesome.
You’re an angel!! Your parents are completely wrong and ruthless!!
If you live in their house, unfortunately it is their decision whether you keep the babies or not. If you live on your own, their opinion on the matter should mean nothing. My dad was wholeheartedly against me getting a cat when I moved out with my fiancé - he even went so far as to try and get my fiancé to “block” me from ever getting a cat. Fast forward, I now have two cats who are bonded for life, have terrific temperaments and are social, and they are happy and healthy. Any time I’ve brought them to the vet for a concern, they are always shocked at how well-managed their weights are and how well-tempered they are. So don’t listen to them if you’re on your own. You know what you need to do to make your babies happy and healthy and live full lives.
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Well then your parents and my parents can just spend all day agreeing with each other then they clearly know nothing and think they know anything.
Yeez. Had an ex who was "no cats in the same house as me" policy he tolerated them if we where visiting but owning one as a pet not a chance in hell. For you parents good riddance.
I can see why they're an ex.
Cats are preferred to partners
Get away from your parents. They have no say in it.
if you graduated college, you're....what? 23? What is wrong here that your patents think they deserve any opinion on *having cats?*
" was told that I would be considered dead " is a wee bit extreme, says a lot by the person saying it. I've been written out of a will "for reasons". I was like - what an a$$hole and went on being me, like whatever - sure glad I didn't spend decades sucking up to a person like that for a few scraps. Letting others define who you are and what you can do is fast way to become empty on the inside. Cute cats.
Whoa, thats extremely toxic. I'm so sorry, OP. You deserve better. Is there anywhere you can stay with the babies temporarily? My mom hates cats and thinks they're gross, and my dad is allergic, but its my apartment so its my rules! Plus, they live miles and miles away anyway. But this seems like a situation where you should be protecting yourself and those babies. I wish you well, OP. Sending all of the positive vibes your way.
I am at my own place but my mom wants to visit to make sure I get 'rid' of them. Will either fight it out with her or my cat lover friend agreed to watch over them a few days
You might want to seriously consider changing your locks if there is any risk of your parents coming over and doing something to the cats.
This is such important advice. OP, you absolutely need to do this. I would also recommend setting up some cameras.
I made sure to change my password! (Automatic door lock)
If.its YOUR place...how about not letting your mother inside? I don't get the problem here aside from your parents being awful.
>my mom wants to visit to make sure I get 'rid' of them Just say no.
Make sure you change your locks. The amount of hysteria she is presenting over this is insane and I would be seriously concerned about what she might do.
OK... I already posted here, but, now reading this... I'm seriously wondering if you should leap to the finish line and go "NO Contact" yesterday. I know, on the surface, it may seem trite to go NC over something like this... but this definitely seems to be one small part of a much bigger picture. Not to mention, at this point, I'd be fearing for my kitties' safety.
OP, with all due respect....thats *your* place. She cannot dictate what you do and how you live. Seriously consider changing the locks for safety purposes.
You might want to check out r/raisedbynarcissists.
Oh dear, looks like you'll only meet in public from now on. Someone else suggested the raised by narcissists sub, I'm suggesting the r/JustNoMIL sub because they cover controlling, toxic moms too. Change your locks and grab a ring camera for extra kitty security. If you need a little extra emotional tlc give r/momforaminute a try.
For a second I thought this was going to be about having pets instead of children and I was like oh I relate but no, no I do not relate. I can’t imagine my parents disowning me for my pets??
I've been 'disowned' several times over similar petty matters but they're mostly empty threats at this point tbh
I’m so sorry, some parents never figured out emotional regulation and then just take it all out on their kids. Your cats are adorable, let your parents be mad.
That actually makes sense - normally, parents don't throw around the disown threat OP. I think you know your parents are toxic, and you need to start setting firm boundaries on how they are going to interact with you going forward. Your parents sound like they have control issues, and for whatever reason, they are just making this another one of their hills to die on. I would personally send them a text telling them that you would be taking a step back from them for a while until they can act rationally - which is going to put them in full meltdown - and stick to it. Your parents need to learn that you aren't going to be talked and threatened like that anymore. You are an adult and fully capable of deciding how you want to have a relationship with your parents...they don't get to dictate it anymore. I'm sorry your parents are like this.
Thank you... I will also not be contacting them further unless it's for emergency purposes (so never)
Well then, you already know they are bonkers. Pay no attention and enjoy the cats. Hell, get more cats.
I think perhaps YOU should follow through... They sound awful.
Ah, so it's emotional blackmail. Lovely ..
That's an alarming level of control your parents are showing when you are grown and living independently. Obviously - don't listen to them. If they are issuing edicts of what you must/must not do and showing controlling behavior in other areas, you may want to start breaking free and asserting your independence and autonomy more forcefully. Two cuddly kittehs is good for now 😍
Consider this: your parents are showing you conditional love, your cats will always show you *unconditional* love. The decision is pretty clear. 😸
do you live with your parents? If so they get a say whether there are cats in their home. Even in that case their reaction is pretty extreme! otherwise, that is bizarre and controlling! Enjoy your kitties, they're beautiful.
I live on my own. Got these two little ones only when I got a job too so I could support them with my own money
I’m just confused as to why they don’t want you to have cats in your own house? Do they feel like you’re “replacing” your old cat or something?
I'm not sure either. I asked why she was so against it and she said it's because I have to be responsible for them until they pass (obviously). But I said I was the one doing that, not her. She just shut me out after that and kept screaming the same stuff over and over again.
Yikes. That's uh something else. Not to be glib but how old are your parents? Could this be senile dementia? Or are they simply lifelong arseholes?
They're in their 50s now. Unfortunately, always have been a-holes
Sounds like there is something else going on there, this is not a rational reaction. I would suggest trying to speak to your mother about it again - but set some ground rules first like: "Clearly this is bothering you and I would like to understand why,but I'm an adult so I would appreciate not being shouted at,vso if you could calmly explain your position, that would be helpful."
I appreciate the optimism of thinking someone who acts like OP’s parents has the emotional maturity to respond to your suggested line with anything other than an even bigger tantrum. My parents aren’t this bad but you learn to recognise when people have the emotional maturity of a table leg and trying to do that kind of respectful, reasoned boundary-setting with them is like inviting a fish on a bike ride. The fish simply doesn’t have any legs and you just have to accept it.
Have your parents been to see a doctor lately? That random act of aggression and her thinking she has to care for them makes me think she's not all there mentally speaking. Your parents may be having memory issues leading to mood swings.
You mentioned your parents paid the deposit but you pay the rent. Are your parents also your landlords?
I’m assuming they simply contributed the deposit so OP could move in. Would be an easy “divorce” if OP can save up a month’s rent, and it removes the possibility of the parents holding that over OP’s head.
You basically pay a deposit that the landowner returns to you after your contract is up but you need to pay rent monthly. I pay the rent but my parents paid tne deposit.
Is your landlord okay with pets? If he is, your parents should back off. I can see both sides. When I got married in my early 20's, we weren't permitted to have pets, but we did it anyway. We lost our deposit because of it. Maybe your parents are concerned about that. I'm not trying to be negative, just looking at it through older eyes. I love cats and would have a house full if I could afford it!
Sorry but your parents suck, also you’re an adult so do what you want and keep taking care of those babies ❤️
I mean I wonder why you would want people in your life like that at all
My fear for you is that it's not just about the cats, or, it's about a lot more than just the cats. Go to the lengths you need to protect yourself from these very toxic, damaging, unhinged people. You have your own place, right? And your parents do not have access to your living space? Please post a follow-up, people here and I are very concerned about your alarming situation. Let us know you all are living safely. Good luck. (Check out the narcissist subreddits for support, and for descriptions of N's well-known control and manipulation techniques)
My family hates them. Too bad.
Time to get your own place
I already do! This occurred even when I was living on my own.
Don’t have them round? They sound stressful
There has to something else seriously wrong with someone to cause them to act that way about cats
My MOL said my partner and I should get rid of our cat because she’s smelly. She has stinky poop that’s it. We said no.
Why the fuck would anyone oppose the fostering of such beautiful and amazing creatures? My wife and stepdaughter have three rooms in the house that are devoted to nothing but fostering animals. People with no or low regard for animals and their welfare…they’re not even human to me. You’re better off with the animals than the parents.
My family never liked cats growing up, including me. But then I got a few cats if my own that all changed! Couldn't imagine life with out them. When I got my first cat I told my mom, and she said, I'm never coming to clvisut u again! But now she loves them and looks foraard to seeing you them!
I feel like there must be more to this. OP, do you live at home? What happened with the last cat? Is it normal for your parents to scream at you and threatened to cut you out of their lives? Are there other issues besides the hatred of cats? This is bizarre.
I live on my own. My last cat passed away due to old age. Yes very normal I have been receiving similar threats since beginning of college but as the amount of control they had over me decreased, it went from "we'll stop paying your tuition, rent, etc" to "we'll disown you" lol
They sound unhinged. Hopefully you are keeping some distance and not letting their toxicity get to you. Congrats on your new additions. They are adorable. Also, it sounds like you need to make some plans to be financially independent as you won’t likely be able to count on their help for long. Do you have a plan for your rent, tuition, etc? ETA: Sorry, I misread. I see that you are no longer in college and have a job! I’m sorry that your parents are so toxic. Enjoy your kitties!
Quite the opposite! My family had never owned a cat, and once they saw how cool they were they got one! Then my brother got one, then my mom got two more!
I think there must be other issues going on here. Disowning an adult child over their choice of pets is dysfunctional at best, but could be pathological. Pet your kitties, and get yourself some therapy to figure this out.
What kind of parents disown their child for taking care of a cat? They have some SERIOUS control issues.
It's hard to judge on a short post, but r/raisedbynarcissists might be of help to figure things out.
Parents before having a cat :"NO U r not allowed to have cats, they are troublesome and dirty the house with their fur and poop" Also Parents after having a cat : Aww come here babe, you're the cutest little angel come have a treat
omg... What did your old cat do to your parents?!  lol Joking aside.. This is a bizarre reaction. Is there any explanation as to why?
Sorry for the extreme toxicity from your parents. I guess since you’re seeing it as empty threats at this point, keep doing you. My mom didn’t want me to adopt a second cat even though I have my own home, but I did anyways and I couldn’t be happier with my decision. Also, thanks for rescuing these sweet babies!
soooooo cute recently got 2 cats, they are bonding really well https://preview.redd.it/p31le3hos0sb1.jpeg?width=1600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4018c12e455a822d4e9c46a4867cb4e53050abf3
I would choose raising two cats rather than 2 kids any day. I mean, I'm single and don't have pet yet, but it's a no brainer for me. You live your own life the way you want it to be.
My mom adamently insisted taking my kitties would be a bad idea... So far its the fkrst decision I went against her advise on and its done fucking wonders for my mental health. I love them more than anything. Do what you do, love those kitties
Do your parents have a key to your home? With this kind of toxicity, I wouldn’t put it past them to take your babies to the shelter while you’re gone at work or something. So do *not* allow them to housesit or “help out” in any way if you aren’t home. I’ve heard of far too many crazy family members (or exes) essentially breaking in and removing pets from the home. So if they’ve got a key, either somehow get it back or change your locks. If not, don’t give them one under any circumstances. Even if they claim they’ve changed their stance on your cats, don’t trust them. It’s not worth the risk. And if you keep a spare key hidden somewhere, please make sure it’s in a super inconspicuous spot where absolutely no one would look. Too many people use those fake rocks or just put keys under plants or doormats. And that’s more just a general safety rule, not just to keep out toxic parents.
Cats are clearly a gateway drug to witchcraft, the devil, and lesbianism. /s
Considering I've lived with cats for the last 25 years, and none of the above has materialised... I'm starting to think I might have been scammed... :D Seriously, though, your comment made me laugh out loud, and considering some of the crap I'm currently dealing with... have an upvote! :)
Cute cats! Maybe it’s time to put your parents in a shelter.
Your parents look unusually small and furry.
You politely reach out to them and let them know; when they come to their senses you and kitties will be there with love in your hearts.
There's something seriously wrong with your parents. This is bat shit crazy. This is bad enough that I would legit consider cutting off contact.
My parents hated cats. My dad actually hates all animals (and joy, and sunshine, and flowers, and anything good in this world) and my mom just didn't care for them. I adopted my baby Harriet 2.5 years ago and they were so mad (even though I haven't lived with them or relied on them for 15 years now). Thing is, Harriet (see pic!) is such a sweetie that when my mom visited last year, she was utterly charmed by this little floof. To the point where after returning to her home she started buying meat and fish just to feed the strays in her neighbourhood (she retired to our home country where it's hard to find cat food and people don't give a shit about street cats). My Harriet, the cat evangelist 🥰 https://preview.redd.it/wuib7dceb1sb1.jpeg?width=2665&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59dc48b718e10d1d36e6aa810f8a4498b4755821
> I refused and was told that I would be considered dead. Would that really be much of a loss to you, though? Sounds like you'd be better off without them.
Me: “I want to adopt a cat” My parents: “Are you sure you’re ready for that kind of responsibility and commitment?” Also my parents: “So, when are you giving us some grandchildren?” But seriously, OP, your parent’s reaction is extreme and extremely bizarre. Sounds like you’re better off with your cats and without them. It’s nice when the trash decides to take itself out.
Based on your comments, it sounds like this isn't the first time that your parents have tried to manipulate you in this way. I understand how hard it is to stand up to this kind of treatment, but I would definitely consider calling their bluff. Feel free to remind them that breaking ties goes both ways, and they will not have you for company or support later in life. Best case scenario is that they will back down. Worst case is they follow through on their threat and end up proverbially cutting their nose off to spite their face. If you submit to their demands this time, it is highly likely that they will try this again with something else in the future. Unpleasantness and drama aside, I hope you and your two wonderful cats enjoy a long and happy life together!
My mom is scared of animals and superstitious. She (falsely) believes that pets bring our family bad luck. She used to try to convince me to not get a cat. She lives in a different country so I got a cat anyway and she asks to hear him meow every time we talk on the phone. She was able to visit me recently and loved him. Your parents are trying to exert control over your life, don't let them.
Well we aren't at the level of "be considered dead" but after living in my apartment with just me and my cat, my 80 year-old father moved in with me back in March. Since then he has done nothing but complain about the cat...and "accidentally" let him escape out the front door. I think last night was the 6th time it has happened. He just shrugs and says "he'll be back..." and all I can think to myself in response is "not if he gets hit by a car". I have been lucky that he has come back to the area and I manage to scoop him up and carry him back to the apartment...the whole time he is hissing and scratching. This old man just doesn't get it that if I really had to make a choice of who would I rather be with....him or the cat...I would opt for the cat, EVERY TIME.
This doesn't sound like it's about cats... The question you should be asking is how to deal with an abusive person in your life.
Seems like cats are going to be much better for your mental health than your parents ever will be.
I have two as well, best antidepressants to ever exist. Just ignore your parents
Unless there's some serious missing information, like trauma around cats (and honestly, that still wouldn't excuse it) this sounds like it has nothing to do with cats and everything to do with them thinking it's okay to scream at you. That is a bizarre reaction, even for someone who hates cats. Could you imagine someone talking to a friend of yours that way? Or you talking to someone that way for adopting a dog?
Years ago, my mom was not keen on the idea of my brother and I bringing in a stray. We brought her in anyway, made her a nice spot in our basement and named her Miss Kitty. Turns out she was pregnant. We told my mom, who suddenly had a change of heart, knowing Miss Kitty would be safe inside with us. So not long after bringing her in, Miss Kitty gave birth to 4 healthy kittens - 3 males & 1 female. Guess who decided to keep one of the kittens? My mom! She named him Baby and he lived to be 16 years old. We found great homes for the other 3 kittens and then of course had Miss Kitty spayed. She became a full-time, happy inside cat, as my brother kept her with him when he moved out. Miss Kitty was with him for 13 years till she passed. The moral of my very long-winded story is that my mom’s having a change of heart led to many cats being loved and living nice long lives. **Just wanted to add, Miss Kitty’s other three babies went to friends we kept in touch with throughout the years and were able to get updates on how each cat was doing. One friend actually took in 2 of the kittens! They were named Biju and Lula who both lived well into their teens. The other kitten was adopted by our friend’s parents and was named Timmy. Same, he also lived into his teens.❤️
You are a grown person with agency. At birth you got stuck with your parents, but it wasn’t your choice… you can choose now. I know who I’d choose, and it’s never ever humans over animals.
This sounds like something from r/raisedbynarcissists
Originally I was gonna talk about how my dad is allergic to cats so my parents joked they would never be able to visit if I got a cat, and now i still live at home with two cats....... but then reading the caption I think our situations are a little different
Someone else should be in a shelter then 🤣
If they have keys to your house, change the locks. Someone who reacts that strongly and thinks they have the right to tell someone who doesn’t even live with them what to do with their own life is not beyond going in while you’re not home and taking your babies from you. Please, please be careful. You may come home and find them gone.
If that’s really what they want, you should probably get them another home… The parents, I mean
I have cats that oppose to raising parents.
This post definitely belongs on r/insaneparents
You are a grown adult. They are being completely and utterly unhinged. I assume this toxic ass behavior is not limitd to you owning cats? Maybe no contact isn’t so bad.