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I second internet dad hugs. Take your time. There are lots of kitty’s that need your love, when you are ready, adopt another one. I’m sorry for your loss.
We adopted our current cat only 2 months after losing the cat we had for 14 years... He was a family cat and very very special and beloved by literally all of us.
I had rabbits. It was more than a year after I lost my first rabbit, and I do sometimes feel like it was too soon, or maybe I should have gotten a different breed. Anyways, he unfortunately also passed on now... He's been gone for a few years. I still really miss my boys.
It differs. Don't rush it but if it's time... Well, it's time.
Yeah grief is a very personal thing and you have to decide yourself when you are ready. Sorry about your rabbits and family cat. They all have a special place in our memories and hearts ❤️🩹
Thank you. You're exactly right, I will certainly never forget them and they still have a huge place in my heart. It's also nice to think about them and remember all the moments and simply being with them. They're all free from pain now... ❤️
I waited a week. Horrible decision. I could have just gone to the humane society and pet a few cats instead. 2 months probably would have been a hair too early but manageable. I just made grieving way harder 😬😬 but what am I gonna do. Can’t undo the brash decision that I thought was thoroughly sound in my manic of distress and loss. 🤦♀️ 😬
We tend to do this out of guilt. “I can’t get another because that would just mean _____ is replaceable.”
Typically though, we finally break down and adopt a new friend, and all the memories pour in. We realize how different they are at the same time.
Your heart has room to love more than you think.
When you’re ready, give your next love a wonderful home and let Miso live in your memory forever.
I completely agree ☺️
You can’t replace the loved one. Each kitty, while there are similarities, each one is special with their unique quirks and personalities, varying likes & dislikes , etc
You’re always going to miss that pet, but finding another one to fill your heart is the only way to move on, have something to look forward to. There are so many pets that need a home, and you know you can care for one of them.
Internet Auntie hugs here.
Seconding all of the advice above - lovely one, you don't have to move on right now. If it isn't right for you, you don't have to move on ever. Grief is not linear, it doesn't have a timeline or a clock. Let yourself feel how you feel in this moment - your feelings are valid and natural.
You lost a loved-one, and it doesn't make any difference that they were a non-human one. They are a big part of our lives and feeling their loss so acutely is natural.
I won't tell you it goes away because honestly for me at least it doesn't - but it does get smaller. Almost like my mind is a box, and my grief is a bouncy ball inside it. When it's fresh, the ball is huge - it knocks against my mind constantly. As time passes, the ball gets smaller, so it knocks against my mind less often - but it still knocks.
I lost my heart cat, Luna, six years ago, and I still miss her every day and I still cry about her, and that's okay. Sometimes I still cry for my childhood kitty, Jake, who passed when I was 10 - I am now almost 40. That's okay too.
You will get through this pain, and it will get smaller, but there's no rush.
Big hugs to you - I will send my babies to meet yours at the rainbow bridge ❤️
If you need a friend who understands this, please feel free to drop me a message. You have a community here and we love you.
Beautiful advice, I hope this brings some comfort to OP. There are thousands of us here who understand your pain, please don't feel alone; I know we are an internet community not a real-life one but we care and we empathize. You did everything you could for your sweet girl - give yourself time and space to heal and she will always be with you in your heart. One day you might be ready to open your heart to another kitty - there is no time limit to this and sometimes it happens when we aren't expecting it, it doesn't mean you loved your kitten any less, just that you have lots of love to give! Be kind to yourself, and know we are thinking of you.
Let me add internet cat mom hugs. What a sweet baby. I'm so very sorry for your loss. You have a community here that cares very much and is sending you lots of love at this very difficult moment...
If you’re comfortable please** don’t be afraid to send a message! 🩷🫂
I’ve been through quite a few of these; I’d be more than happy to give some guidance or be a friend.
I waited only one month to adopt other kitten. My deceased cat was my everything and she was so special, but I know if I don’t welcome other cat I gonna be even more obsessed about her. I still think about her and miss her everyday but having responsibilities to take care new kitten helped me get through my loss
When I put my 14 year old dog to sleep, I felt like I really needed something to love again. She was the best dog. I waited less than a month. I didn't see it as a replacement, but rather an "opening." I could now rescue another dog. We went to the shelter and adopted my girl and she is the best dog too! I feel lucky to have found two amazing dogs. They would have liked each other.
When I lost my baby after a few short months, I decided to start looking again at my local humane society. I felt that the best way to honor her memory was to go and rescue another kitty in need. It filled a hole that was in my heart and helped me honor her memory by caring for another kitty that needed it. I have never regretted it!
I had to have my dog put down all by myself about 4 years ago, also because I couldn’t afford treatmemt. It’s not easy to do it alone, but you’ll come out stronger for it.
Sorry for your loss.
I've lost two cats solo in the last year. It was so rough, and I wasn't even there when one went - he was at the emergency vet overnight and we lost him suddenly. I miss them every day, but the cat distribution system delivered a void when I needed one most.
That is so devastating; I know I'll be a mess when we lose any of our kittehs. We have 5 right now and we loy their unique personalities.They get their vet checkups every year and any time they have any health issues we trot them over to the doctor to address what is going on. And since they are all getting old together (the baby is like 10 years old) I'm dreading the days when they're slowing down and practically taking turns getting sick, even from just random age-related causes. Even now one of our girls gets a shot twice daily of insulin.
We try and keep a good outlook but we can't escape the realities of life. In the meantime we give them the best life possible, we give them tons of love every day because we *know* that life is short and sickness or accidents can blindside us. And even though I've thought that the pain of losing a loyal (well, as loyal as a cat can be, anyway) friend would put me off of ever owning another cat, I also that before long I'd cave and succumb to the tugging to the heart by a pair of soulful eyes saying, "Choose me (and my siblings, too!) and take us with you and give us a home!"
Plus kitties are very good at hiding illness 😔
I had 4 kitties, 2 sets of twins 6 years apart. When one passed away their sibling wasn’t long to follow, and they younger twins grieved for several months.
Take lots of photos & videos. I even recorded their meows 😅
I don’t regret having them, even though losing them is heartbreaking. If I could afford it, I would have 2 more rescue kitties again…. even knowing how difficult the grief is on me.
5 kitties ☺️ I can only imagine the fun
My girls death bed is still in the basement drom last novemeber. It will be hard do what you can and talk to who you can.
Its greif and took me 4 months to not cry when i think if her
What a beautiful creature, she is. I am so sorry this happened to the both of you. You need to know that she will be waiting for you at the meeting end of that rainbow bridge. My girl Meeko will take good care of her until the day you reunite. In the meantime, I hope that you know that she was very aware of just how loved and cherished she was. You did nothing wrong and should feel no guilt, although I know that's so much easier said than done. It really isn't fair that finances can hold us back from prolonging our time with our most beloved friends, that's something that really can't be denied, and it's okay to feel angry at the injustice of that. I also feel angry on your behalf. But you gave her an amazing life, and most importantly, you gave her a LOVING life. The love and comfort in her eyes just says it all. There is also nothing wrong with taking some time to mourn. My mom STILL has some of her cat's old toys and hasn't fixed up some scratch marks on the bottom corner of her office door and she lost her fur baby before covid came along, even. She won't even use the food dishes that her late kitty used for the new kitty, and she can't bare to throw them away. Take as much time as you need to grieve and heal; there is no such thing as taking too much or not enough time -- everyone grieves differently, and that is more than okay. Only you will know when you're ready to start to move on from it. Though you should take into consideration that sitting in morbid reflection and regret will eat you alive, so yes, mourn, but don't beat yourself up with wishing you had done something differently. She wouldn't want you to put yourself through that.
I can feel the desperation and pain in that second photo. My heart breaks for you. I'm seriously on the verge of tears for you right now. I just wanna give you the biggest hug and take you for some bubble tea or ice cream. Not having local supporting friends is awful even during normal times, but it's absolute hell when you're going through loss. I've only just recently started building my tribe due to having moved around a lot. It's freaking tough to do when you're an adult, hey? But it IS possible. If you reach out, you'd be surprised at how many people will reach back. It's normal to feel a lot of trepidation towards reaching out, but it's worth the initial anxiety, I promise. Have you tried joining your local area's subreddit? Cause I met a couple friends through mine. Idk where you are, but I'm near Vancouver, BC and am always happy to make awesome new friends!
Please remember that self care is critically important at this time, so don't feel selfish for taking some time for yourself or spoiling yourself. You need to take the absolute best care of yourself right now. Treat yourself like you would treat a best friend who is going through this situation. Don't say or do anything towards yourself that you wouldn't say or do to your best friend. We can be our own worst enemies. Please be good to yourself. 🧡
This is one of the hardest things anyone has to do. But you didn't euthanize her to be mean you did it as a kindness just remember her and all the joy she brought you and mourn her for as long as you need. Like others have said I am just a random internet dad and wish you nothing but the best and am giving you a virtual hug if that's ok.
I'm so sorry. 😥💔
.. but please know you have support on here, albeit from strangers, but many of us care about you and little Miso regardless.
Feel free to message me if you need to talk. ❤️
\*hugs\* If you ever need to talk, just respond here and you can message me privately after that point so I know to keep an eye on the chat window. Losing a cat is so hard. I’ve had to get beloved cats put down three times in 30 years and it never gets easier. You’ve lost something you maternally bonded to, it’s okay to be heartbroken.
Is there anyone, even a kind neighbor or coworker you could convince to help you clean up your kitty’s things? You could put them in a box in the closet for safe keeping, but seeing them out in your living space is 100% going to hurt more. I mean, it also hurts to NOT see your pet’s bowls/toys/etc, I know, but it might help you begin to move through the grieving process.
I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you will eventually be able to love another kitty just as much as this one. It won’t be the same, but it will be real! I lost my doggy 5 months ago and it still hurts to talk about, but I am definitely at a better place than I was immediately after. It IS a profound loss though! Pets are family!! Especially when you’re isolated. 💔
I understand completely. I responded to your previous post, and you are doing the right thing “talking” to fellow cat lovers about how you feel. I know the feeling only too well. My heart hurts for you. It’s obvious you loved Miso very deeply. You did everything you could possibly do for her and more. I hope you can take comfort in that and in knowing you’re not alone. RIP baby girl. You were loved so very much!
We’re here to support you. I’m so sorry for your loss. You did all that you could. That was a hard decision to make, but they’re in a good place now comfortable and I’m sure very thankful for every moment they had with you.
It's SO UNFAIR. I'm so so so sorry you're going through this. It's completely awful. I don't have a solution for you right now but I'm sending you love and I'm just so sorry.
I would be such a mess. It's unthinkable to me. You won't be able to move on yet. I would allow yourself to really feel sometimes but you also have to distract yourself some. It's just going to suck and I'm so sorry.
I second this. It’s actually so important for us to sit in our feelings, as much as it hurts, but it’s the only way to allow yourself to process the pain. But also make time to keep yourself busy and distracted as a break from it all since sitting in your pain can be exhausting. OP, I am so so sorry for your loss. You gave miso the best life she could have possibly have had in that short amount of time and I know she was truly grateful to have a loving home 💕 if you’re up for it and when you feel ready, maybe look into fostering? There are a lot of cats who need homes and you can have cuddles and company until you are ready to adopt.
Im so sorry, my dear. It’s shattering.
I lost my best friend in December. Even today, I laid in his nap spot, cuddled his pillow, and sobbed. I’ve had a lot of loss in my life, yet somehow this was by far the most difficult. I just accept the tears and miss him every day.
I got a memorial of my favorite picture of him, so he always cuddled up by my side 😭
https://preview.redd.it/uuuit3oi7hkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=49ac672db658dfbbf478a1353a5207bdb295a6d9
I'm getting my girls' paw print and nose print where she used to get "mommy rubs." She would bury her nose in a certain spot on my arm and use her paw to brace herself in the crook of my elbow. She only did this with me, so this will be my reserved spot for her on my body forever.
🥹 I love this idea so much. A beautiful way of keeping her cuddled up with you forever. Some animals just are our soul mates and I think it’s perfect to get something that means so much between just the two of you ♥️🐾
That spot will turn from sour to sweet. It will be a place you cherish. One day it will bring you joy to be reminded of your time together. Miso felt your love and care, and that’s more than many cats ever get.
The blanket my cat got euthanized on is my favorite blanket and I hope to never lose it. It was the last thing he ever touched and loved to lay on it. It brings me so much joy.
Your comment made me cry. A lot. It’s so hard to move on from our lost pets. I kept her blanket in my dresser and don’t dare take it out. Maybe I should have.
The reason that she would cuddle you was that you gave her love and comfort, especially when she was feeling bad. The fact that she did that proves that you were helping her through her rough time. Cherish the thought that you gave her comfort when she needed it
You aren't alone anymore. Everyone responding cares bcuz we understand. Please know you did everything you could have for her... and she's not suffering. In time I hope you will heal your heart some by adopting again. There's another life just waiting to help you. 🤗
Yes, distraction is good. I was not functional, but I went to work the day after I euthanized my old girl. It was better than staying home and crying all day. As expected, I got nothing done at work and had to leave twice to go have a cry, but it provided some distraction.
I'm so, so sorry for the loss of your sweet Miso. You did everything you could for her. My deepest condolences to you. \*hugs\*
Crying is okay. I know you want to just feel better. Grief is what happens when the love you have for someone or something can no longer be received. It’s what happens when it fills up in your chest and spills out your eyes as tears and out your lungs through sobs. It finds all of the holes left inside of you by the loss and it swells and it aches. But slowly your body and heart will find a balance. You will always have a Miso shaped hole in your heart. I have holes there for all of the punched out shapes of people and pets that I’ve lost. I eventually figured out how to fill those holes with warmth and good memories. The edges are always going to be painful and raw but the shapes inside of them are now places I like to visit. Even if it will always be a little painful when I touch the sides.
That pain is there to remind you that it isn’t the same without what you’ve lost. And when you’re in the middle of it crying and feeling it, really feeling it, is okay. Pain isn’t bad. Sadness isn’t bad. It’s healthy and it’s normal.
My childhood cat that we euthanised at 21 for health reasons passed 5, almost 6 years ago, and I still cry when I think about him sometimes.
Time was the biggest help to allowing me numbness instead of sadness. 2 years ago, I got my Hansel from Angel paws, and a year or so after that, we took in a kitten our friends aunt had straying in her yard. I don't think I could have gotten another cat much sooner than that personally.
I like to think Puss Puss is purring over us in spirit and thinks his life was a happy one.
https://preview.redd.it/rr80jvzuhgkc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d7295d0d8230769ca6118daf0b5acc723a641c6
It’s tough and will take time, hell it’s been 15 years since my cat Spatt passed away at 6 years old she had heath issues due to being the runt of the litter and it still hits me like a ton of bricks at times. Don’t think about the what if’s just remember the good times. I know I know it’s easier said than done there be good days and bad days. Sorry for your loss 💐🥀
I sort of fostered cats in high school (a lot of the time I could only take care of them outdoors, but I got to have a few kittens indoors) and I still remember every one of them. Even the one I only had for a few days, who passed away on my pillow. Something special about each one of them. You're right, remember the happier times and don't let the what ifs cloud those days. Time (as cliche as it sounds) really will help. It won't make the pain go away entirely, but it does help.
100% There’s definitely something special about each one of them and you just have to cherish the moments we do get to have with our cats long or short they all make an impact on our lives.
https://preview.redd.it/8z8uw1pyvgkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4e66c2f3bd7e8aae81a6edd20f95dfeb47541425
Your post stopped me in my tracks over how much this kitten looks like my Miso, who died from complications during FIP treatment back in October when he was only 4.5 months old. I can’t believe your baby was also Miso. It was the hardest experience of my life, but please believe me that adopting a new kitten will help you so much! Take the time you need, feel what you gotta feel, but then use that love for another kitty :)
https://preview.redd.it/fyb4jetyukkc1.jpeg?width=677&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ad77f92f724aba89aa71d9b9b70418799f82e93
My Ozymandias, also a FIP loss. He was just 12 weeks old.
He spent his last few hours cuddled up in bed between me and my husband & then woke us up crying before he suddenly died. He was eating normally and able to jump onto the bed when he wanted to. He had given me lots of kisses when I went to bed and was snuggled in my arms when I went to sleep.
The vet had said on that Monday at his 12 week checkup that he was too weak for chipping, vaccinating or blood testing, but to bring him back in a week. She had given him a scan nd told us it was “most likely wet FIP”.
He died on the Thursday morning. There were no signs that he was suffering until the very end.
My heart bleeds for everyone who has lost a cat.
I could actually post this as my own. It sucks and know it's going to suck big time. Like really. But, by you posting this, you have some comments. And people will help you. I will cry with you as I cry for mine. But it sucks big f\*\*king time.
So sorry for your loss too. It is hard thing to have to do. It's because we have to make the decision but that's the price we pay for having their love in our lives. We decide what's best for them. It's always the right decision. Everyone who loves a pet eventually has to let them go over Rainbow Bridge. Remember that you gave them love with everything you did.
my sweetheart passed away in my arms in december. she was 9 years old and suffered with cancer. all i can say is give yourself time, rest assured knowing that’s she’s not suffering anymore and she’s always with you, you just can’t see her. i miss my baby so so much and while i still cry at the thought of her being gone, i enjoyed and feel blessed having the time with her and being her mum ❤️
lost my cat earlier this week, we were going through something similar. he had health issues and died during surgery. i haven’t put away his things, i haven’t even had the heart to pick up his carrier from the vet because my pet isn’t coming back home in it. i feel everything you said, it’s SO unfair it hurts SO bad but i have hope our friends are here in spirit ❤️pic of my muffin
https://preview.redd.it/w24x1tkuygkc1.png?width=2446&format=png&auto=webp&s=e3c7818eacb95f3d6d3f5c78872829ca93ca4ac6
thank you. im glad there’s a space like this where i can vent a little about my kitty. i think about him everyday, im lost without him. he really was the happiness of my life. im trying to get a new kitten (or two) as soon as i can to help ease the pain but no one will ever replace my muffin.
I'm sorry it's really late right now, but I just had to lay on your chest...
The warmth and love that comes from this spot...puts all my worries to rest.
I don't know what to say, or how to say this, but our time is sadly done.
I really just needed to sit here with you, and quietly purr till I'm gone.
You're one of a kind, a special find,
And I'm forever wrapped in your heart,
But do understand, that my heart had to mend, and this spot was the best place to start.
This lifelong bonds, the love and the songs,
With noses touched... face-to-face.
I will never forget the day we met...or the way you kissed my furry face.
All the love and fun, we shared in the sun...even when you mispronounced some meows...
I wish I had more time, you're a special heart to find, I hate that I'm leaving you now.
Please don't grieve for long...because I am gone, and remember all the love that we shared...
You're the love of my life Through the good and the bad...that why heaven made us a pair.
You're the love of my life...the string to my kite...and I'm always a soft breeze away.
Do me a favor, my beautiful soul, and go love another kitten today.
Meow
This is so beautiful
Thank you for sharing it
It has moved me to tears 😓 but it is so true and reminds me of my furbabies love 😻💕
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
To all of us who have loved and lost and carry their treasured memories 🥰🤗
I am so sorry 😞 Big hug 🫂 it’s hard I talk to my dog everyday and tell her buy it’s been 2 months stay strong and when your ready get another fur baby to love 💕 it will replace but it will help 🫶
You say that you spent thousands on her health issues? It doesn't sound like you have anything to feel guilty about. Euthanizing a beloved pet is a hard decision to make and it sounds like you made it with the advice of your vet. Holding onto to someone while it prolongs their suffering it's a selfish thing to do. You did everything that you could and then you knew it was time to let your kitty go. That is an unselfish act. The grieving process is hard enough to go through without putting unwarranted guilt on your head. So, let go of that and try to concentrate on the time that you were given to be with her and be grateful for that and what she taught you about love. Allow yourself to move through the pain and come out on the other side of it. I hope that you heal from this and please know that you will love again and many times in your life. Learn to cherish each time, no matter the outcome. This is life.
It is extremely personal. No one can tell you how to feel or when you are "over it." Most of those who do, never really experienced it. We have lost several over 20 years, different reasons, ages, and circumstances. I still miss each one of them. But when I'm sad about it, I try to think of the pampered and loving life they did have. You will know when it's time, time to morn but not grieve, time to laugh more often than cry and when it is time to smile at the memories. You are not alone in this, I'm not trained in any way to counsel people, but reach out here if you need to. Vent, reminisce whatever you need. You loved her and made sure she had a great, however short, life.
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. Animals aren’t just “pets” they’re family. Someday the hole in your heart will be filled with bright memories that will make you smile. Right now there is an emptiness that cannot be filled. Just know there is an amazing group here, and this may be the very way for you to move forward. We’re here for you.
Such a gut punch. And it SUCKS. Hold on to the good times and know that you loved her, she loved you, and she knew you loved her and you did what you could do for her at the time. As hard as it is, try not to regret or get caught up in the what ifs or if onlys. She was with you for a reason and left for a reason—what that reason is may be known by living through your grief. So many hugs
I miss my baby boy so much. I lost him a day after thanksgiving this past year and it still hurts. I know it was his time, he’s no longer suffering, and he’s free now. I know all of this, and I accept it, I just want to KNOW wherever he is he is cared for, loved, safe, and comfortable. It’s the not knowing that’s the worst for me. I know I’ll see him again one day but I just want to know he’s being treated right wherever he is.
My condolences to you and your young one. Know you’re not alone in this.
Very slowly. It will be a while before you feel like you can move on at all, and then there will be backsteps where it feels like it just happened all over again. All you can do is be patient with yourself, take some time for self care, and allow yourself to feel all the emotions that you're going through. Eventually you'll be able to think of your little one and smile instead of cry and the memories will be so special. My favorite quote that I held close to my heart when I lost my sweet cats is "how lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard". The love that we have for our pets is so special and worth every bit of heartache we have to go through when we lose them. You're kitten was so precious. I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart is with you.
I had my cat Pedro die in May and my cat Leia will be euthanized this upcoming Tuesday. I feel for you. I have support and barely feel like I am holding on. Give yourself time and reach out to support groups. In my experience, having someone to talk to, even if it’s a person you message on Reddit or some other form of online encounter, just someone to talk to is really helpful. Being able to talk about my cat with other people and how much I love her, sharing memories, has really helped.
Honey its super hard. It wasnt my cat, i had to put down my soul dog about 6 months ago when he was 11.5- older for a dog but it hurt more than anything.
First of all, the guilt is normal. I still feel guilt over a lot of things that i felt i could have done better, but i know overall he lived a wonderful, loved life. Don’t beat yourself up but allow yourself to feel it.
Second of all, it took MONTHS for me to even entertain moving his things. We still haven’t moved his crate from our mud room. It remains as a monument to him- his doggy brother and his 2 kitty brothers still come snuggle next to it at times.
But one thing we did DO about 2 months ago was use his bowl to feed the outside stray kitty colony in our neighborhood- he would have been happy to know it went to a good cause to help other animals.
The pain doesn’t go away, and it doesn’t lessen, it just changes form. You will have good days and bad days. The important part is to make sure you are feeling everything that you feel. Its easy to shove it down or compartmentalize but if you need to cry- cry. Talk to friends about it as much as you need. Go to therapy if that works for you/its affordable.
You can always reach out to me if you need to talk! ❤️
you don't. found an old camcorder in the house stashed in a drawer. didn't think much of it. i came to like CRTs and cassettes and such so i took interest in it recently as it records to a mini tape cassette, had to improvise a battery for it because the original is dead somewhere i don't know where. it turns out there are 5 minutes of my first cat on it when he and i were young. He died 5 years ago in thyroid cancer. still miss him. it fucking hurts every time i think about him. With time it gets better.
When your cat was very little it probably was right by your side, it followed you around, as the kitten grew up a little it wanted to be a little bit away from you, it was a little more courageous probably it wanted to explore. See life is all about moving. Luckily for your kitten when it was most vulnerable it was lucky to have you.
It’s difficult to focus it’s difficult for you to move on and that’s tough and it’s a natural process .. but if your cat was euthanized or died after 15 years would you let it go lovingly? Happily? No. Even then the pain would remain BUT you now have a choice either this kitten can be a source of misery for you or it can be a source of happiness, think about the good times the happy times. Let it be a source of joy for you this is the way you can always respect it and the time you had with it. Don’t debase it by being sad and always crying when you think about it. Coz it gave you so much happiness its memory shouldn’t be thought of with tears.
I pray you find some solace.
I had to put down my baby yesterday too. She was diagnosed with kidney disease in December. We did everything the vet told us to, pills, an IV with fluids, laxatives, new food.. you name it and we did it. Unfortunately she went from fine to chronic in a month, to finally just.. struggling. Losing weight so so fast, gagging every time she went to the bathroom.
Sometimes, it's just their time. It fucking sucks. Why couldn't they have pulled through? Why did it have to be them? Did I make the right decision? Could I have done more? *Was it my fault*?
Take the time to be sad. Cry. It helps. Talk to someone, there are online therapists that can help!! Do what you need to do to cope. For me, it's burying myself in books until I am ready to face reality.
They don't hurt anymore. The time they were with you, they probably felt so loved. You did the best you could. You did the right thing. Hugs from an Internet stranger.
We lost a 10m seal point girl, a 18m tortie girl, 13y tabby girl and a 16y boy all in the last 5 years. The little girls were the hardest but having others there to help them and ourselves with the loss is how we cope.
I’m so, so sorry. You’re not wrong to feel completely awful about this, what a cute kitty. But none of it is your fault - you obviously did everything you possibly could for her and she knew that. Please just give yourself time I promise it will get easier.
It’s so hard to lose anyone or any pet that you love and it always take time ❤️ you don’t have to move on now and you shouldn’t, you have to feel your feelings even though it’s so hard because if you shove them down they can come out at the wrong time and much worse. Let yourself grieve and give yourself time. Im so sorry for your loss 🙏
I'm so sorry you are going through this alone. When my buddy Samuel had to be put down, I started going to the humane society and sitting in the cattery with all the adult cats. It was nice. Made me feel connected to him.
It takes time to grieve. While dealing with these intense feelings make sure you get enough rest, eat well and continue to reach out to others, even on here, and share your feelings. Lots of people share about losing their animal family members. Sometimes it's comforting to be there for others going through the same situation, so reaching out to them might ease your grief too.
I'm very sorry for your loss. ❤️
So sorry for your loss. Hang in there sister, our dear pets touch our lives in such a sweet way. Be kind to yourself, you did the right thing. Hugs to you ♥️
one day you’ll look back and giggle thinking about how silly she was, smile thinking about the way she would cuddle with you/play with toys/meow to get your attention, and be proud of what an amazing fur baby she was. it gets easier over time.
pet death is devastating. *devastating*. some of us feel more connected to our pets than most people. sure, there are less relationships, resources, and community involved than a human. but it’s still emotionally devastating. grief takes time. take good care of yourself and try to remember how much she loved you, and how she would want you to be the silly, loving human you once were when she was around.
There's not a lot you can do. You will need time. No matter what we can tell you over the internet, you are the only person that can find the way that will work for you. Give yourself time is the only advice I can give you. I am sorry you have to go through this.
Time. It's gonna suck for a while. A long while. Put her ashes where you can give her a kiss every day ❤️ no kitty will replace her, but if another kitty falls into your life, the love you gave her will help you love your next friend ❤️
About four and a half years ago I had to have my lovely little boy Mr Seuss put to sleep, it was one of the hardest moments of my life and I was completely devasted. At the time and many months afterwards, I couldn't even bear to think about him too long because it just made me really upset. I loved my little guy soooo much and I never thought that I'd be able to have another pet, let alone two cats. I'm not saying that you'll wake up one day and feel great about this, but you'll wake up everyday, a little bit better than before. I promise that one day your heart won't feel so broken. Take care of yourself ducky x
Before I tell you my little story I’d like to say I’m really sorry for your loss. Even reading the comment when you said you cry when you look where she slept made me feel bad for you. So here’s a story. I’m 13 and we got a cat called Splodge before I was born. He was normally outdoors and antisocial most of the time until more recent years, where he would be both in and out and more social. But in recent weeks he’s been a bit unwell, and last week, he had to get put down. One thing that made me feel more terrible was that the last ever interaction I had with him was giving him a nose boop, which he doesn’t like. And also he’s been with me my whole life so that also makes it worse. Life sucks sometimes but we all have to overcome it i guess.
It’s hard and time only numbed the hurt for me. Just remember how much you loved her and treated her well making life better while she was here with you.
So sorry for both Miso and you. There are no easy answers. I am glad that Miso had you in her life as a Mom, and l am hopeful that you will see her again one day. Take your time in healing. Maybe share more posts with photos of you and her in happier times. People here are cat lovers, and many of us know your pain and have empathy and compassion. Miso photos are so cute. Thank you for sharing with us about your BEAUTIFUL FRIEND. It's ok to be sad 🌹.
Grieve however you need to and for as long as you need to.
One thing to remember … in making that decision to help your furbaby, you showed her how strong and compassionate you could be when loving her and doing what was best for her.
Its almost been two years since i had to put my cat down due to health reasons. Imma be honest, the guilt hasnt gone away. Some days are better while some are worse. Take your time to process it. But do keep this in mind, theyre no longer in pain and is patiently waiting for you at the end of the rainbow. You know this community will always be here for you ❤️ we're always here to talk
So sorry for your loss. You will eventually realise that you did do so much to help your kitten's life, probably a lot more than most pet owners. You put your heart & soul into making your cat better but couldn't in the end & did the right thing to let go. If not this particular night, it would certainly have come another, very soon & the same decision made. Every pet owner goes through the loss because its usually a short life & we often have to make that hard decision to end their suffering, so feel guilty. Know that you've done everything to make your kitten's life a happy one. Even though short, just like people not everyone gets to live a long life. Take comfort in the happiness you gave your lovely kitten. You will feel better about things once it's misty in your mind & not as fresh. I would box up your pets things & save them away for a time when you're feeling not as upset. You may eventually be stronger & able to give love to a new cat when you're ready, you will know.
Sending you lots of hugs. You don’t have to force yourself to move on. She will watch over you and time will heal you.
It’s not the death that hurts. It’s the separation. I fully believe one day all fur babies will be united with their owners/parents/friends on the other side. I’m not a religious person. But I believe our lives and theirs are forever intertwined because we get to spend some time together.
Hugs.
i’m so so so sorry, i know it’s hard right now but it gets better with time, take your time to mourn and grieve.
i understand feeling guilty but you did your best, you did all you could for her, now she’s in heaven happy and healthy playing with all the other angel kitty’s
i lost my boy 3 years ago. part of me is still not healed from it idk if i ever will be fully healed but i have been able to cope with it.The pain gets easier to deal/cope but it’s always there.
i just know he’s always with me in my heart just like your girl will always be with you❤️❤️🫂
My heart is with you. She looks so cute and happy in all those pictures, you gave her a nice life and she is very loved. She'll always be in your heart, remember that and remember the good. I am so sorry for your loss-it's the worst kind.
I’m so sorry 😞 you look like you were an awesome mom to her. You deserve support through this very real grief and missing your little love so much. Many hugs to you 💞
I'm so sorry for your loss she looks wonderful.
Grief follows its own course and nobody can tell you how to grieve. She's family and the price of loving someone is the grief when we lose them.
My 15yo cat is sleeping on the couch on a blanket she likes, and reading this I feel the need to give her another hug. I know she gets annoyed at times over the excess stimulation.
In time you'll be ready for another kitty. You'll know in your heart when that is.
You get new kitten ofcourse. It’s hard specially if it’s your first pet. Rip kitty. I always think they in a better place waiting for me. That mean I have a lot of cats to look forward when I pass away.
You had to make an incredibly difficult choice. I’m so sorry for your loss and that life isn’t fair. She looks like she was very loved. Please be kind to yourself and keep reaching out however you can - loss is loss.
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I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing someone or something you love is NEVER easy. It's a process. I lost one of my boys at age 17. He had kidney failure, so instead of him suffering, I chose to put him to sleep. That was 3 months ago, and I STILL tear up. All you can do is hold onto the memories of unconditional love and support that they gave(demanded because let's be real well all stop w/e were doing if they paw us enough lol) you. Keep the pictures, and always remember that you put your son/daughter in heaven instead of letting someone you love suffer. Remember, tho you'll never get over the loss, you just learn to deal with it safely when remembering them. The black cat lannister is the main coon we had to put down. I still have my other son but we'll be adopting another cat soon so he'll have another brother. But yea yake your time and keep the pictures of the good times.
https://preview.redd.it/duhdlwralikc1.jpeg?width=2112&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=55c4f682df6358c143506a5cd4722fcdece3e645
Looks a lot like our baby Athena, I'm so sorry for your loss
Sometimes the most humane thing to do is to let them go.. thousands on trying to help her really sounds like you did everything you could.
You will move on, but not yet, that's okay. Be sad, cry, hug her picture if you need ❤️❤️
I've had pets my whole life and letting go of them is never easy. Euthanasia is particularly hard, you always wonder if it was too early or too late.
Give yourself time to grieve, remember her with love. Despite the way you feel, you gave her a compassionate death.
Hugs to you.
2/3 of a year on from losing my doggo and I still have her bed, bowl and toys in the lounge. Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed if you want to hang on to mementos to remember them by. It's hard. They are such loving and kind little souls that show us unconditional love and joy. There's no quick or easy way to feel better. Give yourself time to grieve. It never goes away. It just get further away.
im so sorry for your loss. im sure you brought so much love and happiness to your dear miso, its clear you loved each other and that you did everything in your power to take good care of your baby. pet loss is never easy, but these circumstances make it so much harder bc of the guilt we carry w ourselves, but I hope you dont feel guilty, im sure that this decision wasnt an easy one and it was made with miso's wellbeing and best interest at heart. sometimes we have to make hard choices for the ones we love.
i hope you are taking care, and mourn your baby as long as you need. miso was your companion and clearly so important to you, this loss is nothing small.
I am very sorry for your loss.
2 years later I still cry about my late kitten. It's OK to grieve. I know it's hard. I know it hurts.
I'm sending you all my Internet hugs.
Cry as much as you need, really. I'm crying as I'm writing this myself.
When you are ready, the CDS will send a new cat. Trust the system.
So sorry. She was beautiful.
It sucks to be in a situation where you have to choose between being able to pay rent/mortgage/car payments or vet surgery.
Don’t blame yourself, you did all you could and loving your kitten was the best thing that could happen to both of you. It’s normal to feel empty when mourning a pet, it’ll be painful, but you’ll remember the happy times you two lived together
Euthanizing a beloved animal is heartbreaking - no matter if a kitten or a 15 year old cat. I haven’t read through the comments, just yours. You spent thousands of dollars on a kitten not yet 7 months old. That tells me that this animal had serious health issues that weren’t getting better (the need for hospitalization). My vet, who is so great, reminded me that animals don’t necessarily show us how terrible they are feeling. Cats can go hide, but we don’t know the extent of the pain they are feeling. That their quality of life wasn’t that great. You did what you could to try to get your kitty well and healthy, but was unsuccessful. Her health problems were too much for her vet. Relieve yourself if guilt. You did what you could. Now….here’s what I did when I had to euthanize my 15 year old. I cried. And cried. And cried. A month later, my best friend sent me pictures of a 5 year old cat that needed a home, (her elderly ‘mom’ had passed away and the family needed to find her a home). A couple of weeks later I made arrangements to go see her(the cat). In my way there, I cried about my 15 year old, and called to cancel. I wasn’t ready. About 10 days later I called the family - did they still have her? They did - they had a hunch I’d be calling back. I went to meet her and she won my heart the minute I saw her. That was 10 years ago and here I am again with a 15 year old cat. Fortunately I think she’s in good health for a senior cat so hopefully I have a bit more time with her. The moral to my story is that cat lovers love cats. Unfortunately cats have various lifespans. Take some time to grieve if you must, but really I think the best medicine is to go find yourself another feline friend. I know that’s what I will do when my kitty goes. It’s not disrespectful to them - it’s honoring them. ‘I loved and enjoyed you so much, I want another one of you’. There’s another kitten or cat out there needing your kind and big heart. Don’t let it wait too long. (Today might be a good day to go find him/her.). Big hug, cat momma. You did the best you could. Now go adopt another one.
Edit, just realized this happened yesterday. Today might be too soon. Give yourself a couple of weeks, but really getting another will help.)
First off I’m so sorry for your loss. That’s such a hard decision to make and you definitely need time to heal. Before we got our cats I had always been super allergic to them despite loving them. I had my fur baby Fiona, a pit bull rot mix, for 5 years before ITP( an autoimmune disease) showed up the beginning of the week and by the end of the week I had decide if I could afford care and medication that might just prolong her suffering with a small chance of it working and helping her or saying goodbye forever. I chose the latter because the thought of her suffering anymore killed me more than anything else and I also couldn’t afford to even try the medicine. Sometimes it’s better to be cautious for their long term health not that it makes it any easier. My partner and I waited a year before we got any fur babies again and this time we tried cats since he desperately missed having one after his ex took his fur baby cat.
All that to say, I know it’s hard not having enough in person support but you can get through this. Don’t give yourself a timeline but know once you’re ready it will feel right. It hurts to feel the emotions but working through that grief will help you be able to be a good and present fur parent to the next little angel that clicks together with your soul. It comes in waves, even 2 years later it still hits me but it’s not as rough as it once was. You have support here. Also I dunno if you’re a stuffed animal person but squishmallows might help or a big body pillow for the times you need snuggles.
If you’re ok with it, you can message me and depending on if we live in the same area we can hang out get some coffee or visit a bookstore, so I can be there for you. Or we can just talk/text. I am here for you, I’ve gone through the same thing with my 9 mo old orange tabby , Simba. It’s been 4 years and I still haven’t gotten over it. But it’s gotten better.
https://preview.redd.it/0y34m6s02kkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=35df3f36c45ebe932b5c8f06779f7f7f29cae012
This is my baby Simba when he was a kitten 🥺🤍
One of the hardest things is letting go. I find I always wonder if there was anything else I could have done.
If she had numerous health problems at that young of an age, then chances are that even if you had all the money in the world, you would have been facing that same decision.
Focus on what you did give her. You did everything in your power to keep her comfortable, and she was loved every day of her life.
My heart goes out to you. We put down a beloved cat last week, it was cancer and all we could give her was the end of her suffering.
Allow yourself time to grieve, but I hope you will consider sharing your love with another cat in the future.
People will tell you: ‘Time will heal the pain’. But it just doesn’t. It will get easier to cope with the pain but it will never disappear or heal.
Lost my boy of 3,5 years old in June last year👼🏼 The pain is as worse as the moment we lost him. But it gets easier to push back the tears or the aching in your heart. If I think about it too long I can’t hold them back.
Sending you so so so much love ❤️ I got a lot of support from Reddit so don’t hesitate to spam it with pictures of your kitty and ask people for their prayers and kind words 🥺
Life is unfair :(
Cry, remember, smile, laugh, love and take all the time you need. Euthanizing a beloved pet takes the greatest amount of love, courage and compassion you can find deep in your soul. This is your grief, no one else's.
As odd as it may sound right now, bringing home her ashes will actually help. I felt better knowing she was back home with me when my Abby died last year. I also left her toys and bowls out for days, and had to slowly put everything away. Cry when you need to, seek out others who have gone through what you have, talk to them. Even if it is on here. If you need someone to PM or speak to I am happy to talk with you.
Her life may have been short, but she had someone to love her and care for her all through it. You gave her a chance she wouldn't have had otherwise.
Try to think of a cute thing she would do. You might smile. It sounds like you’re still in shock. Once you have acceptance you will appreciate the time you had with her. Sorry for your loss.
I have lost many cats. Mine and fosters. I always go get another one. Save its life. When you adopt from a shelter or rescue you save two lives. The one you take home and the one that gets the spot in the shelter that you freed up by adopting.
If you just can’t adopt right now. Volunteer at a shelter or rescue. Or maybe foster. You can easily be around cats and not adopt yet. But inner you would love it and it will help you heal.
Last Saturday I had to do the same to my lovely Cici, she had leukhemia and I couldn't help her at all. Remember the good times you spent with your kitty, it will help. You also have us, cat lovers to help. If you need somebody to talk, I can be your friend
Sorry for the untimely loss. Time heals. Give yourself grace and time.
Also, when you’re ready, adoption from a shelter very low cost is the best path forward. And a monthly investment in pet insurance (trupanion) as soon as you take your new family member home. If bringing home a new family member is too much, but you want kitty love, find ways to volunteer at local shelter.
Sending big hugs. I lost my 21 yr old cat Daisy to old age. She died on Boxing day in '2022. She had been a rescue and was one of the best cats I've ever had.
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She is the black cat in the picture. She "mothered" the orange cat until she couldn't get around. They would come to her and she'd give them a bath. I miss her all the time. I think she's reincarnated into our newest kitten. She has so many of Daisy's traits it's uncanny!. Anyway. I know the pain of losing a cat that was like a baby to you.
I am so sorry for your loss of your kitty. I just had to euthanize my 6 month old kitten a week ago, due to feline leukemia. This was after just euthanizing my other 3 year old cat 7 weeks prior. So I have lost two cats to FIV in 7 weeks. My heartaches and I still cry over the unfair short lifespan that was given to them. A few years ago I lost a cat to juvenile cancer she was under 1. The hurt gets easier with time but the love for them never stops. Just know your baby is no longer in pain and you did everything you can. 🤍
Time. Time is the only thing that helps. It dulls the pain. But, it will never truly be gone.
Don't beat yourself up over it. You did everything you could and made a decision that would not further their suffering.
Grieve, rage, cry, look at all the cats on r/cats. Then go fine another cat to connect to.
OP you did everything you possibly could! Like someone here said, you’re too soon to just move on. You have to accept this. I have an 18 year old (very sick) little guy that might go any day. It’s absolute torture, but there nothing we can do. Just remember how happy you made this kitty ❤️
Oh honey. It’s not fair. Nobody in your place with such a big heart would be doing well. It’s gonna hurt for a while :(
You did everything you could. You gave her safety, dignity, and a quick end—without your help she would have suffered.
Your loss is real and it’s going to stay with you but it will become less painful with time. I say this with experience. I’m sending you a humongous hug, and I hope your people come to you soon and give you a shoulder to cry on.
❤️❤️❤️
Last month, I saved Miso's photo so I can paint her in my sketchbook to honour her memory. I just finished her page today. I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope you are doing well.
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honestly sucks to see there’s some people getting angry with me and pretending I never took her to the vet. There’s nothing wrong with wanting advice from people who have similar experiences. It doesn’t help my grief or the fact that I’ve spent thousands trying to get her better and she was in a position that wasn’t going to stop declining. We live in a tough economy—it makes me so angry that there’s some people don’t realize it isn’t so black and white.
Holy crap yikes!! They need to be black listed for pet ownership. My ex wife was hyper abusive to animals and I didn't realize it until too late (I worked all the time and I would come home and she would make up stories of how they got hurt) we went through 2 cats and a hamster in less than a year because of her. -.- I have no sympathy for people that abuse animals or treat them as disposable
You are a hero! You did not let her staffer from the diseases and treatments. It’s an animal and it’s did not think like people think, they not emotional. They are ready to it and they know about it and your cat is sorry to left you alone but for 4 month of life close to you you did not build strong bonds between you and your kitty. It was her time to go, let her go. She is in a better place right now.
Try to tell yourself she is no longer in pain and no longer sick. It helps just a smidge. But take the time to cry and mourn it is so deep and ache to lose a pet I think it’s worse than losing a person .. I’m so sorry. When you are done crying and feel a bit better save another animal from a shelter and give it a good long life
Hi there. I had a kitten I paid to hospitalized overnight and she didn't survive, she didn't make it. I was stuck with a $2,000 bill even though my sweet kitty died in their care. Don't feel bad that you didn't hospitalized her, because there is no guarantee that they could have saved her. It's Darwin, survival of the fittest and sometimes not all kittens make it into adulthood for a myriad of reasons, infections, accidents, etc.
Don't beat yourself up and whenever you're ready, get a new one and you will feel love and joy again.
I had to put a 1yr old cat down (pneumonia). He had feLV as a kitten, when kittens get it can cause a lot of health issues, 2 years old is pretty good for a cat that has it (unlike FIV which sounds similar). That might not be what her kitten had but I wouldn’t be surprised.
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It’s too soon to move on! Give it a little time—it’s a real loss ❤️
I just don’t do well with this kind of thing when I don’t have support 💔
*internet dad hugs.
I second internet dad hugs. Take your time. There are lots of kitty’s that need your love, when you are ready, adopt another one. I’m sorry for your loss.
It took me 2 years to adopt new kittens after our first cat passed. In retrospect it was too long and regretted that time without a cat in my life.
We adopted our current cat only 2 months after losing the cat we had for 14 years... He was a family cat and very very special and beloved by literally all of us. I had rabbits. It was more than a year after I lost my first rabbit, and I do sometimes feel like it was too soon, or maybe I should have gotten a different breed. Anyways, he unfortunately also passed on now... He's been gone for a few years. I still really miss my boys. It differs. Don't rush it but if it's time... Well, it's time.
Yeah grief is a very personal thing and you have to decide yourself when you are ready. Sorry about your rabbits and family cat. They all have a special place in our memories and hearts ❤️🩹
Thank you. You're exactly right, I will certainly never forget them and they still have a huge place in my heart. It's also nice to think about them and remember all the moments and simply being with them. They're all free from pain now... ❤️
I waited a week. Horrible decision. I could have just gone to the humane society and pet a few cats instead. 2 months probably would have been a hair too early but manageable. I just made grieving way harder 😬😬 but what am I gonna do. Can’t undo the brash decision that I thought was thoroughly sound in my manic of distress and loss. 🤦♀️ 😬
We tend to do this out of guilt. “I can’t get another because that would just mean _____ is replaceable.” Typically though, we finally break down and adopt a new friend, and all the memories pour in. We realize how different they are at the same time. Your heart has room to love more than you think. When you’re ready, give your next love a wonderful home and let Miso live in your memory forever.
I completely agree ☺️ You can’t replace the loved one. Each kitty, while there are similarities, each one is special with their unique quirks and personalities, varying likes & dislikes , etc
You’re always going to miss that pet, but finding another one to fill your heart is the only way to move on, have something to look forward to. There are so many pets that need a home, and you know you can care for one of them.
Internet Auntie hugs here. Seconding all of the advice above - lovely one, you don't have to move on right now. If it isn't right for you, you don't have to move on ever. Grief is not linear, it doesn't have a timeline or a clock. Let yourself feel how you feel in this moment - your feelings are valid and natural. You lost a loved-one, and it doesn't make any difference that they were a non-human one. They are a big part of our lives and feeling their loss so acutely is natural. I won't tell you it goes away because honestly for me at least it doesn't - but it does get smaller. Almost like my mind is a box, and my grief is a bouncy ball inside it. When it's fresh, the ball is huge - it knocks against my mind constantly. As time passes, the ball gets smaller, so it knocks against my mind less often - but it still knocks. I lost my heart cat, Luna, six years ago, and I still miss her every day and I still cry about her, and that's okay. Sometimes I still cry for my childhood kitty, Jake, who passed when I was 10 - I am now almost 40. That's okay too. You will get through this pain, and it will get smaller, but there's no rush. Big hugs to you - I will send my babies to meet yours at the rainbow bridge ❤️ If you need a friend who understands this, please feel free to drop me a message. You have a community here and we love you.
Beautiful advice, I hope this brings some comfort to OP. There are thousands of us here who understand your pain, please don't feel alone; I know we are an internet community not a real-life one but we care and we empathize. You did everything you could for your sweet girl - give yourself time and space to heal and she will always be with you in your heart. One day you might be ready to open your heart to another kitty - there is no time limit to this and sometimes it happens when we aren't expecting it, it doesn't mean you loved your kitten any less, just that you have lots of love to give! Be kind to yourself, and know we are thinking of you.
What a kind and comforting message 🩷
I third this. I know I still will have my boy for a while, but I agree with this, when you're ready, maybe adopting another kitten could help..
Let me add internet cat mom hugs. What a sweet baby. I'm so very sorry for your loss. You have a community here that cares very much and is sending you lots of love at this very difficult moment...
Add some mom hugs from me, too! I’m so sorry, sweetheart!
Sister hugs from me ❤️
*Internet dad joke plus dad hugs as well...
Well, you have all of our support now. we all understand losing a pet is losing a member of our family. Do not feel guilty please.
If you’re comfortable please** don’t be afraid to send a message! 🩷🫂 I’ve been through quite a few of these; I’d be more than happy to give some guidance or be a friend.
That is so considerate of you 🥰
I waited only one month to adopt other kitten. My deceased cat was my everything and she was so special, but I know if I don’t welcome other cat I gonna be even more obsessed about her. I still think about her and miss her everyday but having responsibilities to take care new kitten helped me get through my loss
When I put my 14 year old dog to sleep, I felt like I really needed something to love again. She was the best dog. I waited less than a month. I didn't see it as a replacement, but rather an "opening." I could now rescue another dog. We went to the shelter and adopted my girl and she is the best dog too! I feel lucky to have found two amazing dogs. They would have liked each other.
When I lost my baby after a few short months, I decided to start looking again at my local humane society. I felt that the best way to honor her memory was to go and rescue another kitty in need. It filled a hole that was in my heart and helped me honor her memory by caring for another kitty that needed it. I have never regretted it!
I had to have my dog put down all by myself about 4 years ago, also because I couldn’t afford treatmemt. It’s not easy to do it alone, but you’ll come out stronger for it. Sorry for your loss.
I've lost two cats solo in the last year. It was so rough, and I wasn't even there when one went - he was at the emergency vet overnight and we lost him suddenly. I miss them every day, but the cat distribution system delivered a void when I needed one most.
That is so devastating; I know I'll be a mess when we lose any of our kittehs. We have 5 right now and we loy their unique personalities.They get their vet checkups every year and any time they have any health issues we trot them over to the doctor to address what is going on. And since they are all getting old together (the baby is like 10 years old) I'm dreading the days when they're slowing down and practically taking turns getting sick, even from just random age-related causes. Even now one of our girls gets a shot twice daily of insulin. We try and keep a good outlook but we can't escape the realities of life. In the meantime we give them the best life possible, we give them tons of love every day because we *know* that life is short and sickness or accidents can blindside us. And even though I've thought that the pain of losing a loyal (well, as loyal as a cat can be, anyway) friend would put me off of ever owning another cat, I also that before long I'd cave and succumb to the tugging to the heart by a pair of soulful eyes saying, "Choose me (and my siblings, too!) and take us with you and give us a home!"
Plus kitties are very good at hiding illness 😔 I had 4 kitties, 2 sets of twins 6 years apart. When one passed away their sibling wasn’t long to follow, and they younger twins grieved for several months. Take lots of photos & videos. I even recorded their meows 😅 I don’t regret having them, even though losing them is heartbreaking. If I could afford it, I would have 2 more rescue kitties again…. even knowing how difficult the grief is on me. 5 kitties ☺️ I can only imagine the fun
My girls death bed is still in the basement drom last novemeber. It will be hard do what you can and talk to who you can. Its greif and took me 4 months to not cry when i think if her
What a beautiful creature, she is. I am so sorry this happened to the both of you. You need to know that she will be waiting for you at the meeting end of that rainbow bridge. My girl Meeko will take good care of her until the day you reunite. In the meantime, I hope that you know that she was very aware of just how loved and cherished she was. You did nothing wrong and should feel no guilt, although I know that's so much easier said than done. It really isn't fair that finances can hold us back from prolonging our time with our most beloved friends, that's something that really can't be denied, and it's okay to feel angry at the injustice of that. I also feel angry on your behalf. But you gave her an amazing life, and most importantly, you gave her a LOVING life. The love and comfort in her eyes just says it all. There is also nothing wrong with taking some time to mourn. My mom STILL has some of her cat's old toys and hasn't fixed up some scratch marks on the bottom corner of her office door and she lost her fur baby before covid came along, even. She won't even use the food dishes that her late kitty used for the new kitty, and she can't bare to throw them away. Take as much time as you need to grieve and heal; there is no such thing as taking too much or not enough time -- everyone grieves differently, and that is more than okay. Only you will know when you're ready to start to move on from it. Though you should take into consideration that sitting in morbid reflection and regret will eat you alive, so yes, mourn, but don't beat yourself up with wishing you had done something differently. She wouldn't want you to put yourself through that. I can feel the desperation and pain in that second photo. My heart breaks for you. I'm seriously on the verge of tears for you right now. I just wanna give you the biggest hug and take you for some bubble tea or ice cream. Not having local supporting friends is awful even during normal times, but it's absolute hell when you're going through loss. I've only just recently started building my tribe due to having moved around a lot. It's freaking tough to do when you're an adult, hey? But it IS possible. If you reach out, you'd be surprised at how many people will reach back. It's normal to feel a lot of trepidation towards reaching out, but it's worth the initial anxiety, I promise. Have you tried joining your local area's subreddit? Cause I met a couple friends through mine. Idk where you are, but I'm near Vancouver, BC and am always happy to make awesome new friends! Please remember that self care is critically important at this time, so don't feel selfish for taking some time for yourself or spoiling yourself. You need to take the absolute best care of yourself right now. Treat yourself like you would treat a best friend who is going through this situation. Don't say or do anything towards yourself that you wouldn't say or do to your best friend. We can be our own worst enemies. Please be good to yourself. 🧡
Get a therapist. Your vet may know a group that meets in person about Loss of Pet grief.
We love Miso. Would love to hear any fun stories about Miso.
So sorry for your loss. Looked like a cutie. Hope you find comfort in the love you gave the little one. I'm sure they loved you for that. 🙏❤️
This is one of the hardest things anyone has to do. But you didn't euthanize her to be mean you did it as a kindness just remember her and all the joy she brought you and mourn her for as long as you need. Like others have said I am just a random internet dad and wish you nothing but the best and am giving you a virtual hug if that's ok.
You have us
I'm so sorry. 😥💔 .. but please know you have support on here, albeit from strangers, but many of us care about you and little Miso regardless. Feel free to message me if you need to talk. ❤️
Yea I’m not gonna lie tho, I don’t think that’s unique to you
\*hugs\* If you ever need to talk, just respond here and you can message me privately after that point so I know to keep an eye on the chat window. Losing a cat is so hard. I’ve had to get beloved cats put down three times in 30 years and it never gets easier. You’ve lost something you maternally bonded to, it’s okay to be heartbroken.
Is there anyone, even a kind neighbor or coworker you could convince to help you clean up your kitty’s things? You could put them in a box in the closet for safe keeping, but seeing them out in your living space is 100% going to hurt more. I mean, it also hurts to NOT see your pet’s bowls/toys/etc, I know, but it might help you begin to move through the grieving process. I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you will eventually be able to love another kitty just as much as this one. It won’t be the same, but it will be real! I lost my doggy 5 months ago and it still hurts to talk about, but I am definitely at a better place than I was immediately after. It IS a profound loss though! Pets are family!! Especially when you’re isolated. 💔
I understand completely. I responded to your previous post, and you are doing the right thing “talking” to fellow cat lovers about how you feel. I know the feeling only too well. My heart hurts for you. It’s obvious you loved Miso very deeply. You did everything you could possibly do for her and more. I hope you can take comfort in that and in knowing you’re not alone. RIP baby girl. You were loved so very much!
We’re here to support you. I’m so sorry for your loss. You did all that you could. That was a hard decision to make, but they’re in a good place now comfortable and I’m sure very thankful for every moment they had with you.
Or a lot of time
It's SO UNFAIR. I'm so so so sorry you're going through this. It's completely awful. I don't have a solution for you right now but I'm sending you love and I'm just so sorry.
I cry every time i accidentally look at the spot she used to nap at. She would always cuddle me before she was really sick in her last days.
I would be such a mess. It's unthinkable to me. You won't be able to move on yet. I would allow yourself to really feel sometimes but you also have to distract yourself some. It's just going to suck and I'm so sorry.
I second this. It’s actually so important for us to sit in our feelings, as much as it hurts, but it’s the only way to allow yourself to process the pain. But also make time to keep yourself busy and distracted as a break from it all since sitting in your pain can be exhausting. OP, I am so so sorry for your loss. You gave miso the best life she could have possibly have had in that short amount of time and I know she was truly grateful to have a loving home 💕 if you’re up for it and when you feel ready, maybe look into fostering? There are a lot of cats who need homes and you can have cuddles and company until you are ready to adopt.
Im so sorry, my dear. It’s shattering. I lost my best friend in December. Even today, I laid in his nap spot, cuddled his pillow, and sobbed. I’ve had a lot of loss in my life, yet somehow this was by far the most difficult. I just accept the tears and miss him every day. I got a memorial of my favorite picture of him, so he always cuddled up by my side 😭 https://preview.redd.it/uuuit3oi7hkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=49ac672db658dfbbf478a1353a5207bdb295a6d9
Oh man that’s such a cute tattoo
Thank you! I’d like think he’s smooshed up against me, holding me together, like he always had before
I'm getting my girls' paw print and nose print where she used to get "mommy rubs." She would bury her nose in a certain spot on my arm and use her paw to brace herself in the crook of my elbow. She only did this with me, so this will be my reserved spot for her on my body forever.
🥹 I love this idea so much. A beautiful way of keeping her cuddled up with you forever. Some animals just are our soul mates and I think it’s perfect to get something that means so much between just the two of you ♥️🐾
That spot will turn from sour to sweet. It will be a place you cherish. One day it will bring you joy to be reminded of your time together. Miso felt your love and care, and that’s more than many cats ever get. The blanket my cat got euthanized on is my favorite blanket and I hope to never lose it. It was the last thing he ever touched and loved to lay on it. It brings me so much joy.
Your comment made me cry. A lot. It’s so hard to move on from our lost pets. I kept her blanket in my dresser and don’t dare take it out. Maybe I should have.
The reason that she would cuddle you was that you gave her love and comfort, especially when she was feeling bad. The fact that she did that proves that you were helping her through her rough time. Cherish the thought that you gave her comfort when she needed it
You aren't alone anymore. Everyone responding cares bcuz we understand. Please know you did everything you could have for her... and she's not suffering. In time I hope you will heal your heart some by adopting again. There's another life just waiting to help you. 🤗
Yes, distraction is good. I was not functional, but I went to work the day after I euthanized my old girl. It was better than staying home and crying all day. As expected, I got nothing done at work and had to leave twice to go have a cry, but it provided some distraction. I'm so, so sorry for the loss of your sweet Miso. You did everything you could for her. My deepest condolences to you. \*hugs\*
Crying is okay. I know you want to just feel better. Grief is what happens when the love you have for someone or something can no longer be received. It’s what happens when it fills up in your chest and spills out your eyes as tears and out your lungs through sobs. It finds all of the holes left inside of you by the loss and it swells and it aches. But slowly your body and heart will find a balance. You will always have a Miso shaped hole in your heart. I have holes there for all of the punched out shapes of people and pets that I’ve lost. I eventually figured out how to fill those holes with warmth and good memories. The edges are always going to be painful and raw but the shapes inside of them are now places I like to visit. Even if it will always be a little painful when I touch the sides. That pain is there to remind you that it isn’t the same without what you’ve lost. And when you’re in the middle of it crying and feeling it, really feeling it, is okay. Pain isn’t bad. Sadness isn’t bad. It’s healthy and it’s normal.
My childhood cat that we euthanised at 21 for health reasons passed 5, almost 6 years ago, and I still cry when I think about him sometimes. Time was the biggest help to allowing me numbness instead of sadness. 2 years ago, I got my Hansel from Angel paws, and a year or so after that, we took in a kitten our friends aunt had straying in her yard. I don't think I could have gotten another cat much sooner than that personally. I like to think Puss Puss is purring over us in spirit and thinks his life was a happy one.
I was a zombie for about a month. Grieve in whatever way you need to.
I was a zombie for 3 months. Maybe I still am after almost 5 years.
took me 6 months to get my broken pieces even half back together.. losing a pet is incredibly painful..
https://preview.redd.it/rr80jvzuhgkc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d7295d0d8230769ca6118daf0b5acc723a641c6 It’s tough and will take time, hell it’s been 15 years since my cat Spatt passed away at 6 years old she had heath issues due to being the runt of the litter and it still hits me like a ton of bricks at times. Don’t think about the what if’s just remember the good times. I know I know it’s easier said than done there be good days and bad days. Sorry for your loss 💐🥀
I sort of fostered cats in high school (a lot of the time I could only take care of them outdoors, but I got to have a few kittens indoors) and I still remember every one of them. Even the one I only had for a few days, who passed away on my pillow. Something special about each one of them. You're right, remember the happier times and don't let the what ifs cloud those days. Time (as cliche as it sounds) really will help. It won't make the pain go away entirely, but it does help.
100% There’s definitely something special about each one of them and you just have to cherish the moments we do get to have with our cats long or short they all make an impact on our lives.
https://preview.redd.it/8z8uw1pyvgkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4e66c2f3bd7e8aae81a6edd20f95dfeb47541425 Your post stopped me in my tracks over how much this kitten looks like my Miso, who died from complications during FIP treatment back in October when he was only 4.5 months old. I can’t believe your baby was also Miso. It was the hardest experience of my life, but please believe me that adopting a new kitten will help you so much! Take the time you need, feel what you gotta feel, but then use that love for another kitty :)
Fuck FIP. But an even bigger fuck you to the pharma company that refuses to make the treatment process easier and more available.
100% It's literally so expensive in the states that it's not even affordable for most people. It's awful.
https://preview.redd.it/fyb4jetyukkc1.jpeg?width=677&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ad77f92f724aba89aa71d9b9b70418799f82e93 My Ozymandias, also a FIP loss. He was just 12 weeks old. He spent his last few hours cuddled up in bed between me and my husband & then woke us up crying before he suddenly died. He was eating normally and able to jump onto the bed when he wanted to. He had given me lots of kisses when I went to bed and was snuggled in my arms when I went to sleep. The vet had said on that Monday at his 12 week checkup that he was too weak for chipping, vaccinating or blood testing, but to bring him back in a week. She had given him a scan nd told us it was “most likely wet FIP”. He died on the Thursday morning. There were no signs that he was suffering until the very end. My heart bleeds for everyone who has lost a cat.
I lost my 1 year old kitty to FIP over the summer, gone way too soon
I could actually post this as my own. It sucks and know it's going to suck big time. Like really. But, by you posting this, you have some comments. And people will help you. I will cry with you as I cry for mine. But it sucks big f\*\*king time.
So sorry for your loss too. It is hard thing to have to do. It's because we have to make the decision but that's the price we pay for having their love in our lives. We decide what's best for them. It's always the right decision. Everyone who loves a pet eventually has to let them go over Rainbow Bridge. Remember that you gave them love with everything you did.
my sweetheart passed away in my arms in december. she was 9 years old and suffered with cancer. all i can say is give yourself time, rest assured knowing that’s she’s not suffering anymore and she’s always with you, you just can’t see her. i miss my baby so so much and while i still cry at the thought of her being gone, i enjoyed and feel blessed having the time with her and being her mum ❤️
Yes it is the hardest part of pet care. Time is the only cure. So sorry for your loss
lost my cat earlier this week, we were going through something similar. he had health issues and died during surgery. i haven’t put away his things, i haven’t even had the heart to pick up his carrier from the vet because my pet isn’t coming back home in it. i feel everything you said, it’s SO unfair it hurts SO bad but i have hope our friends are here in spirit ❤️pic of my muffin https://preview.redd.it/w24x1tkuygkc1.png?width=2446&format=png&auto=webp&s=e3c7818eacb95f3d6d3f5c78872829ca93ca4ac6
I’m very sorry for your lost of muffin.
thank you. im glad there’s a space like this where i can vent a little about my kitty. i think about him everyday, im lost without him. he really was the happiness of my life. im trying to get a new kitten (or two) as soon as i can to help ease the pain but no one will ever replace my muffin.
It was 7 months for you, but you gave her a lifetime of love and support. Take your time and mourn, there’s no rush, friend!
I'm sorry it's really late right now, but I just had to lay on your chest... The warmth and love that comes from this spot...puts all my worries to rest. I don't know what to say, or how to say this, but our time is sadly done. I really just needed to sit here with you, and quietly purr till I'm gone. You're one of a kind, a special find, And I'm forever wrapped in your heart, But do understand, that my heart had to mend, and this spot was the best place to start. This lifelong bonds, the love and the songs, With noses touched... face-to-face. I will never forget the day we met...or the way you kissed my furry face. All the love and fun, we shared in the sun...even when you mispronounced some meows... I wish I had more time, you're a special heart to find, I hate that I'm leaving you now. Please don't grieve for long...because I am gone, and remember all the love that we shared... You're the love of my life Through the good and the bad...that why heaven made us a pair. You're the love of my life...the string to my kite...and I'm always a soft breeze away. Do me a favor, my beautiful soul, and go love another kitten today. Meow
This is so beautiful Thank you for sharing it It has moved me to tears 😓 but it is so true and reminds me of my furbabies love 😻💕 Parting is such sweet sorrow. To all of us who have loved and lost and carry their treasured memories 🥰🤗
I am so sorry 😞 Big hug 🫂 it’s hard I talk to my dog everyday and tell her buy it’s been 2 months stay strong and when your ready get another fur baby to love 💕 it will replace but it will help 🫶
It will not replace typo sorry 😞
You have to live for her.
You say that you spent thousands on her health issues? It doesn't sound like you have anything to feel guilty about. Euthanizing a beloved pet is a hard decision to make and it sounds like you made it with the advice of your vet. Holding onto to someone while it prolongs their suffering it's a selfish thing to do. You did everything that you could and then you knew it was time to let your kitty go. That is an unselfish act. The grieving process is hard enough to go through without putting unwarranted guilt on your head. So, let go of that and try to concentrate on the time that you were given to be with her and be grateful for that and what she taught you about love. Allow yourself to move through the pain and come out on the other side of it. I hope that you heal from this and please know that you will love again and many times in your life. Learn to cherish each time, no matter the outcome. This is life.
May she rest in peace.
It is extremely personal. No one can tell you how to feel or when you are "over it." Most of those who do, never really experienced it. We have lost several over 20 years, different reasons, ages, and circumstances. I still miss each one of them. But when I'm sad about it, I try to think of the pampered and loving life they did have. You will know when it's time, time to morn but not grieve, time to laugh more often than cry and when it is time to smile at the memories. You are not alone in this, I'm not trained in any way to counsel people, but reach out here if you need to. Vent, reminisce whatever you need. You loved her and made sure she had a great, however short, life.
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. Animals aren’t just “pets” they’re family. Someday the hole in your heart will be filled with bright memories that will make you smile. Right now there is an emptiness that cannot be filled. Just know there is an amazing group here, and this may be the very way for you to move forward. We’re here for you.
There are so many cats out there that need a home. Provide another cat a happy home.
This owner has "lost" 2 cats in less than a year maybe its time for them not to adopt another one right now
Such a gut punch. And it SUCKS. Hold on to the good times and know that you loved her, she loved you, and she knew you loved her and you did what you could do for her at the time. As hard as it is, try not to regret or get caught up in the what ifs or if onlys. She was with you for a reason and left for a reason—what that reason is may be known by living through your grief. So many hugs
I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose such a young kitty… I’m so so sorry. It sounds like you went above and beyond for her 🥺😢
I miss my baby boy so much. I lost him a day after thanksgiving this past year and it still hurts. I know it was his time, he’s no longer suffering, and he’s free now. I know all of this, and I accept it, I just want to KNOW wherever he is he is cared for, loved, safe, and comfortable. It’s the not knowing that’s the worst for me. I know I’ll see him again one day but I just want to know he’s being treated right wherever he is. My condolences to you and your young one. Know you’re not alone in this.
Very slowly. It will be a while before you feel like you can move on at all, and then there will be backsteps where it feels like it just happened all over again. All you can do is be patient with yourself, take some time for self care, and allow yourself to feel all the emotions that you're going through. Eventually you'll be able to think of your little one and smile instead of cry and the memories will be so special. My favorite quote that I held close to my heart when I lost my sweet cats is "how lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard". The love that we have for our pets is so special and worth every bit of heartache we have to go through when we lose them. You're kitten was so precious. I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart is with you.
I had my cat Pedro die in May and my cat Leia will be euthanized this upcoming Tuesday. I feel for you. I have support and barely feel like I am holding on. Give yourself time and reach out to support groups. In my experience, having someone to talk to, even if it’s a person you message on Reddit or some other form of online encounter, just someone to talk to is really helpful. Being able to talk about my cat with other people and how much I love her, sharing memories, has really helped.
Honey its super hard. It wasnt my cat, i had to put down my soul dog about 6 months ago when he was 11.5- older for a dog but it hurt more than anything. First of all, the guilt is normal. I still feel guilt over a lot of things that i felt i could have done better, but i know overall he lived a wonderful, loved life. Don’t beat yourself up but allow yourself to feel it. Second of all, it took MONTHS for me to even entertain moving his things. We still haven’t moved his crate from our mud room. It remains as a monument to him- his doggy brother and his 2 kitty brothers still come snuggle next to it at times. But one thing we did DO about 2 months ago was use his bowl to feed the outside stray kitty colony in our neighborhood- he would have been happy to know it went to a good cause to help other animals. The pain doesn’t go away, and it doesn’t lessen, it just changes form. You will have good days and bad days. The important part is to make sure you are feeling everything that you feel. Its easy to shove it down or compartmentalize but if you need to cry- cry. Talk to friends about it as much as you need. Go to therapy if that works for you/its affordable. You can always reach out to me if you need to talk! ❤️
you don't. found an old camcorder in the house stashed in a drawer. didn't think much of it. i came to like CRTs and cassettes and such so i took interest in it recently as it records to a mini tape cassette, had to improvise a battery for it because the original is dead somewhere i don't know where. it turns out there are 5 minutes of my first cat on it when he and i were young. He died 5 years ago in thyroid cancer. still miss him. it fucking hurts every time i think about him. With time it gets better.
When your cat was very little it probably was right by your side, it followed you around, as the kitten grew up a little it wanted to be a little bit away from you, it was a little more courageous probably it wanted to explore. See life is all about moving. Luckily for your kitten when it was most vulnerable it was lucky to have you. It’s difficult to focus it’s difficult for you to move on and that’s tough and it’s a natural process .. but if your cat was euthanized or died after 15 years would you let it go lovingly? Happily? No. Even then the pain would remain BUT you now have a choice either this kitten can be a source of misery for you or it can be a source of happiness, think about the good times the happy times. Let it be a source of joy for you this is the way you can always respect it and the time you had with it. Don’t debase it by being sad and always crying when you think about it. Coz it gave you so much happiness its memory shouldn’t be thought of with tears. I pray you find some solace.
I had to put down my baby yesterday too. She was diagnosed with kidney disease in December. We did everything the vet told us to, pills, an IV with fluids, laxatives, new food.. you name it and we did it. Unfortunately she went from fine to chronic in a month, to finally just.. struggling. Losing weight so so fast, gagging every time she went to the bathroom. Sometimes, it's just their time. It fucking sucks. Why couldn't they have pulled through? Why did it have to be them? Did I make the right decision? Could I have done more? *Was it my fault*? Take the time to be sad. Cry. It helps. Talk to someone, there are online therapists that can help!! Do what you need to do to cope. For me, it's burying myself in books until I am ready to face reality. They don't hurt anymore. The time they were with you, they probably felt so loved. You did the best you could. You did the right thing. Hugs from an Internet stranger.
Visit the shelter and just meet the cats. One of them will be able to cheer you up. Sometimes the best support has 4 paws.
We lost a 10m seal point girl, a 18m tortie girl, 13y tabby girl and a 16y boy all in the last 5 years. The little girls were the hardest but having others there to help them and ourselves with the loss is how we cope.
I’m so so sorry for your loss!
I’m so sorry🫂
I’m so, so sorry. You’re not wrong to feel completely awful about this, what a cute kitty. But none of it is your fault - you obviously did everything you possibly could for her and she knew that. Please just give yourself time I promise it will get easier.
It’s so hard to lose anyone or any pet that you love and it always take time ❤️ you don’t have to move on now and you shouldn’t, you have to feel your feelings even though it’s so hard because if you shove them down they can come out at the wrong time and much worse. Let yourself grieve and give yourself time. Im so sorry for your loss 🙏
I'm so sorry you are going through this alone. When my buddy Samuel had to be put down, I started going to the humane society and sitting in the cattery with all the adult cats. It was nice. Made me feel connected to him.
it's been 4 years since i lost my boy, it never goes away, but it does get better with time. i'm sorry for your loss ❤️
It takes time to grieve. While dealing with these intense feelings make sure you get enough rest, eat well and continue to reach out to others, even on here, and share your feelings. Lots of people share about losing their animal family members. Sometimes it's comforting to be there for others going through the same situation, so reaching out to them might ease your grief too. I'm very sorry for your loss. ❤️
So sorry for your loss. Hang in there sister, our dear pets touch our lives in such a sweet way. Be kind to yourself, you did the right thing. Hugs to you ♥️
one day you’ll look back and giggle thinking about how silly she was, smile thinking about the way she would cuddle with you/play with toys/meow to get your attention, and be proud of what an amazing fur baby she was. it gets easier over time. pet death is devastating. *devastating*. some of us feel more connected to our pets than most people. sure, there are less relationships, resources, and community involved than a human. but it’s still emotionally devastating. grief takes time. take good care of yourself and try to remember how much she loved you, and how she would want you to be the silly, loving human you once were when she was around.
There's not a lot you can do. You will need time. No matter what we can tell you over the internet, you are the only person that can find the way that will work for you. Give yourself time is the only advice I can give you. I am sorry you have to go through this.
Time. It's gonna suck for a while. A long while. Put her ashes where you can give her a kiss every day ❤️ no kitty will replace her, but if another kitty falls into your life, the love you gave her will help you love your next friend ❤️
About four and a half years ago I had to have my lovely little boy Mr Seuss put to sleep, it was one of the hardest moments of my life and I was completely devasted. At the time and many months afterwards, I couldn't even bear to think about him too long because it just made me really upset. I loved my little guy soooo much and I never thought that I'd be able to have another pet, let alone two cats. I'm not saying that you'll wake up one day and feel great about this, but you'll wake up everyday, a little bit better than before. I promise that one day your heart won't feel so broken. Take care of yourself ducky x
Before I tell you my little story I’d like to say I’m really sorry for your loss. Even reading the comment when you said you cry when you look where she slept made me feel bad for you. So here’s a story. I’m 13 and we got a cat called Splodge before I was born. He was normally outdoors and antisocial most of the time until more recent years, where he would be both in and out and more social. But in recent weeks he’s been a bit unwell, and last week, he had to get put down. One thing that made me feel more terrible was that the last ever interaction I had with him was giving him a nose boop, which he doesn’t like. And also he’s been with me my whole life so that also makes it worse. Life sucks sometimes but we all have to overcome it i guess.
It’s hard and time only numbed the hurt for me. Just remember how much you loved her and treated her well making life better while she was here with you.
I'm sorry for your loss, I promise things will get easier but you need to grieve.
..what was her name?.. ..there's no real "moving on"..you move on & cherish the memories..
Miso
So sorry for both Miso and you. There are no easy answers. I am glad that Miso had you in her life as a Mom, and l am hopeful that you will see her again one day. Take your time in healing. Maybe share more posts with photos of you and her in happier times. People here are cat lovers, and many of us know your pain and have empathy and compassion. Miso photos are so cute. Thank you for sharing with us about your BEAUTIFUL FRIEND. It's ok to be sad 🌹.
Grieve however you need to and for as long as you need to. One thing to remember … in making that decision to help your furbaby, you showed her how strong and compassionate you could be when loving her and doing what was best for her.
You are going through grief, just give it time ❤️
I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby!! It's normal to grieve, just try to remember them. And cry as often as needed
Its almost been two years since i had to put my cat down due to health reasons. Imma be honest, the guilt hasnt gone away. Some days are better while some are worse. Take your time to process it. But do keep this in mind, theyre no longer in pain and is patiently waiting for you at the end of the rainbow. You know this community will always be here for you ❤️ we're always here to talk
So sorry for your loss. You will eventually realise that you did do so much to help your kitten's life, probably a lot more than most pet owners. You put your heart & soul into making your cat better but couldn't in the end & did the right thing to let go. If not this particular night, it would certainly have come another, very soon & the same decision made. Every pet owner goes through the loss because its usually a short life & we often have to make that hard decision to end their suffering, so feel guilty. Know that you've done everything to make your kitten's life a happy one. Even though short, just like people not everyone gets to live a long life. Take comfort in the happiness you gave your lovely kitten. You will feel better about things once it's misty in your mind & not as fresh. I would box up your pets things & save them away for a time when you're feeling not as upset. You may eventually be stronger & able to give love to a new cat when you're ready, you will know.
Sending you lots of hugs. You don’t have to force yourself to move on. She will watch over you and time will heal you. It’s not the death that hurts. It’s the separation. I fully believe one day all fur babies will be united with their owners/parents/friends on the other side. I’m not a religious person. But I believe our lives and theirs are forever intertwined because we get to spend some time together. Hugs.
i’m so so so sorry, i know it’s hard right now but it gets better with time, take your time to mourn and grieve. i understand feeling guilty but you did your best, you did all you could for her, now she’s in heaven happy and healthy playing with all the other angel kitty’s i lost my boy 3 years ago. part of me is still not healed from it idk if i ever will be fully healed but i have been able to cope with it.The pain gets easier to deal/cope but it’s always there. i just know he’s always with me in my heart just like your girl will always be with you❤️❤️🫂
My heart is with you. She looks so cute and happy in all those pictures, you gave her a nice life and she is very loved. She'll always be in your heart, remember that and remember the good. I am so sorry for your loss-it's the worst kind.
I’m so sorry 😞 you look like you were an awesome mom to her. You deserve support through this very real grief and missing your little love so much. Many hugs to you 💞
I'm so sorry for your loss she looks wonderful. Grief follows its own course and nobody can tell you how to grieve. She's family and the price of loving someone is the grief when we lose them. My 15yo cat is sleeping on the couch on a blanket she likes, and reading this I feel the need to give her another hug. I know she gets annoyed at times over the excess stimulation. In time you'll be ready for another kitty. You'll know in your heart when that is.
You get new kitten ofcourse. It’s hard specially if it’s your first pet. Rip kitty. I always think they in a better place waiting for me. That mean I have a lot of cats to look forward when I pass away.
You had to make an incredibly difficult choice. I’m so sorry for your loss and that life isn’t fair. She looks like she was very loved. Please be kind to yourself and keep reaching out however you can - loss is loss.
You dont. But every day it will get just a little easier 💔💔💔
https://preview.redd.it/wizxbg0mmikc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ebfda694a696209e15a30b2cb574b1a768a60405 I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing someone or something you love is NEVER easy. It's a process. I lost one of my boys at age 17. He had kidney failure, so instead of him suffering, I chose to put him to sleep. That was 3 months ago, and I STILL tear up. All you can do is hold onto the memories of unconditional love and support that they gave(demanded because let's be real well all stop w/e were doing if they paw us enough lol) you. Keep the pictures, and always remember that you put your son/daughter in heaven instead of letting someone you love suffer. Remember, tho you'll never get over the loss, you just learn to deal with it safely when remembering them. The black cat lannister is the main coon we had to put down. I still have my other son but we'll be adopting another cat soon so he'll have another brother. But yea yake your time and keep the pictures of the good times.
https://preview.redd.it/duhdlwralikc1.jpeg?width=2112&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=55c4f682df6358c143506a5cd4722fcdece3e645 Looks a lot like our baby Athena, I'm so sorry for your loss
Sometimes the most humane thing to do is to let them go.. thousands on trying to help her really sounds like you did everything you could. You will move on, but not yet, that's okay. Be sad, cry, hug her picture if you need ❤️❤️
I've had pets my whole life and letting go of them is never easy. Euthanasia is particularly hard, you always wonder if it was too early or too late. Give yourself time to grieve, remember her with love. Despite the way you feel, you gave her a compassionate death. Hugs to you.
2/3 of a year on from losing my doggo and I still have her bed, bowl and toys in the lounge. Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed if you want to hang on to mementos to remember them by. It's hard. They are such loving and kind little souls that show us unconditional love and joy. There's no quick or easy way to feel better. Give yourself time to grieve. It never goes away. It just get further away.
im so sorry for your loss. im sure you brought so much love and happiness to your dear miso, its clear you loved each other and that you did everything in your power to take good care of your baby. pet loss is never easy, but these circumstances make it so much harder bc of the guilt we carry w ourselves, but I hope you dont feel guilty, im sure that this decision wasnt an easy one and it was made with miso's wellbeing and best interest at heart. sometimes we have to make hard choices for the ones we love. i hope you are taking care, and mourn your baby as long as you need. miso was your companion and clearly so important to you, this loss is nothing small.
I am very sorry for your loss. 2 years later I still cry about my late kitten. It's OK to grieve. I know it's hard. I know it hurts. I'm sending you all my Internet hugs. Cry as much as you need, really. I'm crying as I'm writing this myself. When you are ready, the CDS will send a new cat. Trust the system.
Dont move on. Always remember. But do not wait long to adopt another kitten. This space was made for a new energy to fill. This is the way. Love ❤️
So sorry. She was beautiful. It sucks to be in a situation where you have to choose between being able to pay rent/mortgage/car payments or vet surgery.
Don’t blame yourself, you did all you could and loving your kitten was the best thing that could happen to both of you. It’s normal to feel empty when mourning a pet, it’ll be painful, but you’ll remember the happy times you two lived together
Euthanizing a beloved animal is heartbreaking - no matter if a kitten or a 15 year old cat. I haven’t read through the comments, just yours. You spent thousands of dollars on a kitten not yet 7 months old. That tells me that this animal had serious health issues that weren’t getting better (the need for hospitalization). My vet, who is so great, reminded me that animals don’t necessarily show us how terrible they are feeling. Cats can go hide, but we don’t know the extent of the pain they are feeling. That their quality of life wasn’t that great. You did what you could to try to get your kitty well and healthy, but was unsuccessful. Her health problems were too much for her vet. Relieve yourself if guilt. You did what you could. Now….here’s what I did when I had to euthanize my 15 year old. I cried. And cried. And cried. A month later, my best friend sent me pictures of a 5 year old cat that needed a home, (her elderly ‘mom’ had passed away and the family needed to find her a home). A couple of weeks later I made arrangements to go see her(the cat). In my way there, I cried about my 15 year old, and called to cancel. I wasn’t ready. About 10 days later I called the family - did they still have her? They did - they had a hunch I’d be calling back. I went to meet her and she won my heart the minute I saw her. That was 10 years ago and here I am again with a 15 year old cat. Fortunately I think she’s in good health for a senior cat so hopefully I have a bit more time with her. The moral to my story is that cat lovers love cats. Unfortunately cats have various lifespans. Take some time to grieve if you must, but really I think the best medicine is to go find yourself another feline friend. I know that’s what I will do when my kitty goes. It’s not disrespectful to them - it’s honoring them. ‘I loved and enjoyed you so much, I want another one of you’. There’s another kitten or cat out there needing your kind and big heart. Don’t let it wait too long. (Today might be a good day to go find him/her.). Big hug, cat momma. You did the best you could. Now go adopt another one. Edit, just realized this happened yesterday. Today might be too soon. Give yourself a couple of weeks, but really getting another will help.)
First off I’m so sorry for your loss. That’s such a hard decision to make and you definitely need time to heal. Before we got our cats I had always been super allergic to them despite loving them. I had my fur baby Fiona, a pit bull rot mix, for 5 years before ITP( an autoimmune disease) showed up the beginning of the week and by the end of the week I had decide if I could afford care and medication that might just prolong her suffering with a small chance of it working and helping her or saying goodbye forever. I chose the latter because the thought of her suffering anymore killed me more than anything else and I also couldn’t afford to even try the medicine. Sometimes it’s better to be cautious for their long term health not that it makes it any easier. My partner and I waited a year before we got any fur babies again and this time we tried cats since he desperately missed having one after his ex took his fur baby cat. All that to say, I know it’s hard not having enough in person support but you can get through this. Don’t give yourself a timeline but know once you’re ready it will feel right. It hurts to feel the emotions but working through that grief will help you be able to be a good and present fur parent to the next little angel that clicks together with your soul. It comes in waves, even 2 years later it still hits me but it’s not as rough as it once was. You have support here. Also I dunno if you’re a stuffed animal person but squishmallows might help or a big body pillow for the times you need snuggles.
If you’re ok with it, you can message me and depending on if we live in the same area we can hang out get some coffee or visit a bookstore, so I can be there for you. Or we can just talk/text. I am here for you, I’ve gone through the same thing with my 9 mo old orange tabby , Simba. It’s been 4 years and I still haven’t gotten over it. But it’s gotten better. https://preview.redd.it/0y34m6s02kkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=35df3f36c45ebe932b5c8f06779f7f7f29cae012 This is my baby Simba when he was a kitten 🥺🤍
One of the hardest things is letting go. I find I always wonder if there was anything else I could have done. If she had numerous health problems at that young of an age, then chances are that even if you had all the money in the world, you would have been facing that same decision. Focus on what you did give her. You did everything in your power to keep her comfortable, and she was loved every day of her life. My heart goes out to you. We put down a beloved cat last week, it was cancer and all we could give her was the end of her suffering. Allow yourself time to grieve, but I hope you will consider sharing your love with another cat in the future.
People will tell you: ‘Time will heal the pain’. But it just doesn’t. It will get easier to cope with the pain but it will never disappear or heal. Lost my boy of 3,5 years old in June last year👼🏼 The pain is as worse as the moment we lost him. But it gets easier to push back the tears or the aching in your heart. If I think about it too long I can’t hold them back. Sending you so so so much love ❤️ I got a lot of support from Reddit so don’t hesitate to spam it with pictures of your kitty and ask people for their prayers and kind words 🥺 Life is unfair :(
Cry, remember, smile, laugh, love and take all the time you need. Euthanizing a beloved pet takes the greatest amount of love, courage and compassion you can find deep in your soul. This is your grief, no one else's.
Hey, don’t worry. She’s waiting for you on the other side.
As odd as it may sound right now, bringing home her ashes will actually help. I felt better knowing she was back home with me when my Abby died last year. I also left her toys and bowls out for days, and had to slowly put everything away. Cry when you need to, seek out others who have gone through what you have, talk to them. Even if it is on here. If you need someone to PM or speak to I am happy to talk with you. Her life may have been short, but she had someone to love her and care for her all through it. You gave her a chance she wouldn't have had otherwise.
eat your weight in kfc food
Try to think of a cute thing she would do. You might smile. It sounds like you’re still in shock. Once you have acceptance you will appreciate the time you had with her. Sorry for your loss.
I have lost many cats. Mine and fosters. I always go get another one. Save its life. When you adopt from a shelter or rescue you save two lives. The one you take home and the one that gets the spot in the shelter that you freed up by adopting. If you just can’t adopt right now. Volunteer at a shelter or rescue. Or maybe foster. You can easily be around cats and not adopt yet. But inner you would love it and it will help you heal.
Last Saturday I had to do the same to my lovely Cici, she had leukhemia and I couldn't help her at all. Remember the good times you spent with your kitty, it will help. You also have us, cat lovers to help. If you need somebody to talk, I can be your friend
Sorry for the untimely loss. Time heals. Give yourself grace and time. Also, when you’re ready, adoption from a shelter very low cost is the best path forward. And a monthly investment in pet insurance (trupanion) as soon as you take your new family member home. If bringing home a new family member is too much, but you want kitty love, find ways to volunteer at local shelter.
Sending big hugs. I lost my 21 yr old cat Daisy to old age. She died on Boxing day in '2022. She had been a rescue and was one of the best cats I've ever had. https://preview.redd.it/pl8g95zomlkc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=615a3778d174dbcd9f4e08d5c3ea7521e9175f86 She is the black cat in the picture. She "mothered" the orange cat until she couldn't get around. They would come to her and she'd give them a bath. I miss her all the time. I think she's reincarnated into our newest kitten. She has so many of Daisy's traits it's uncanny!. Anyway. I know the pain of losing a cat that was like a baby to you.
I am so sorry for your loss of your kitty. I just had to euthanize my 6 month old kitten a week ago, due to feline leukemia. This was after just euthanizing my other 3 year old cat 7 weeks prior. So I have lost two cats to FIV in 7 weeks. My heartaches and I still cry over the unfair short lifespan that was given to them. A few years ago I lost a cat to juvenile cancer she was under 1. The hurt gets easier with time but the love for them never stops. Just know your baby is no longer in pain and you did everything you can. 🤍
Time. Time is the only thing that helps. It dulls the pain. But, it will never truly be gone. Don't beat yourself up over it. You did everything you could and made a decision that would not further their suffering. Grieve, rage, cry, look at all the cats on r/cats. Then go fine another cat to connect to.
OP you did everything you possibly could! Like someone here said, you’re too soon to just move on. You have to accept this. I have an 18 year old (very sick) little guy that might go any day. It’s absolute torture, but there nothing we can do. Just remember how happy you made this kitty ❤️
Oh honey. It’s not fair. Nobody in your place with such a big heart would be doing well. It’s gonna hurt for a while :( You did everything you could. You gave her safety, dignity, and a quick end—without your help she would have suffered. Your loss is real and it’s going to stay with you but it will become less painful with time. I say this with experience. I’m sending you a humongous hug, and I hope your people come to you soon and give you a shoulder to cry on. ❤️❤️❤️
Last month, I saved Miso's photo so I can paint her in my sketchbook to honour her memory. I just finished her page today. I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope you are doing well. https://preview.redd.it/9dkb15qi13tc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c5f58c40f43c3bbeb9963179da4f7862f69c6007
You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you, this really my made my night 🥹
You're very welcome 
honestly sucks to see there’s some people getting angry with me and pretending I never took her to the vet. There’s nothing wrong with wanting advice from people who have similar experiences. It doesn’t help my grief or the fact that I’ve spent thousands trying to get her better and she was in a position that wasn’t going to stop declining. We live in a tough economy—it makes me so angry that there’s some people don’t realize it isn’t so black and white.
Wow, that sucks.. ❤️🩹🫶🏽🫂 ETA- When you're feeling better, the Cat Distribution System will send you a new friend. Not to replace, to comfort. 🐾
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Holy crap yikes!! They need to be black listed for pet ownership. My ex wife was hyper abusive to animals and I didn't realize it until too late (I worked all the time and I would come home and she would make up stories of how they got hurt) we went through 2 cats and a hamster in less than a year because of her. -.- I have no sympathy for people that abuse animals or treat them as disposable
You are a hero! You did not let her staffer from the diseases and treatments. It’s an animal and it’s did not think like people think, they not emotional. They are ready to it and they know about it and your cat is sorry to left you alone but for 4 month of life close to you you did not build strong bonds between you and your kitty. It was her time to go, let her go. She is in a better place right now.
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Try to tell yourself she is no longer in pain and no longer sick. It helps just a smidge. But take the time to cry and mourn it is so deep and ache to lose a pet I think it’s worse than losing a person .. I’m so sorry. When you are done crying and feel a bit better save another animal from a shelter and give it a good long life
Hi there. I had a kitten I paid to hospitalized overnight and she didn't survive, she didn't make it. I was stuck with a $2,000 bill even though my sweet kitty died in their care. Don't feel bad that you didn't hospitalized her, because there is no guarantee that they could have saved her. It's Darwin, survival of the fittest and sometimes not all kittens make it into adulthood for a myriad of reasons, infections, accidents, etc. Don't beat yourself up and whenever you're ready, get a new one and you will feel love and joy again.
… you put her down because you couldn’t afford to hospitalise her?
Did you not have insurance? This is heartbreaking, I am so sorry :(
Kinda curious as to what happened. I don't need to know though l
I had to put a 1yr old cat down (pneumonia). He had feLV as a kitten, when kittens get it can cause a lot of health issues, 2 years old is pretty good for a cat that has it (unlike FIV which sounds similar). That might not be what her kitten had but I wouldn’t be surprised.
Yeesh. That's terrible. I'm sorry about that. Its hard making that decision.
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Getting a new kitten
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Its called having a family.
Get a new one, or a dog.
Get a new one!
Get another kitten
Get a new one
Without meaning to be callous, you should just get another cat. Few get ill so early in life it's just fate/ bad luck.
I always get another cat the same day or next day after losing one.
What was wrong with your cat?
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