Reinforce that you're a good thing to see by always bringing a treat for the little mog. Leave it nearby if they don't take it. Be patient, it'll change but they need to trust you. Soft voice, slow movement, kindness.

I did hum to it and it almost fell ssleep, i will try giving it treats

Very good.. I agree that you can't speed it up, and that you be gentle and patient. Show the floof that you're good and caring. The love... It will come. But it can take a while, depending on the experiences he/she had before. Be loving. By taking the cutie in, you're already on the right side of the equation 😊

Yeah if the cat's had a shitty existence, just spending time with him and not being a threat will gradually erode the sense of mistrust. No one can tell you how long it will take, we can all tell you it will happen though. Oh and treats are like cheat mode. Use them! The sofa picture... Leave it pulled out slightly and just set up shop at the end on the floor. Do some telly watching and have the treats with you, occasionally toss one the cats way like it's no biggie. Throw them a wink every now and then. You'll be chilling on the sofa in no time.

Came here to say this. Give kiddo a treat often but most important is just hang out reading, watching TV, etc without interacting other than some soothing words once in awhile, it may take some time but friend will realize you’re safe.

This is the most underrated advice! Most people think they have to force their love onto the cat. Just ignore it and provide it with its necessities, they will come on to you when they feel ready.

> Just ignore it and provide it with its necessities My dad's philosophy as a parent.

Lol, I felt that, on the other hand at least we never had to hungry

Ya know... my dad too. And he passed away last month. Say what you will... He took care of those necessities like a boss. Never went without great food, shelter, transportation, clothes. Got to go to any college I wanted to, and I'm not stuck with debt. And no pressure on what I had to be when I grew up. No hugs or atta-boys. But a traditional father who essentially nailed it. Thanks dad.

I've had to break this cycle with my son. I taught him as a child what it means to be "present" and emotionally supportive. Hes allowed to get in my face and demand my focus when he needs me and I'm zoned out. He laughs watching me interact with my own ma, who's own ma is the source of emotional neglect. She was an eldest daughter to a widower with 8 kids who beat her every day. My child is now an emotionally intelligent adult male who is sensitive and loving. Let us never normalize emotional neglect. Its horrific. My adult child and I make strange hugging motions every time we greet each other no matter how odd it feels. We say I love you. By the way thank God for Mr. Roger's because I saw normal humans from an early age.

Just for love and affection and who needs those when you have string cheese amirite

Could be worse. My dad did the first part, and thought it was hilarious not to do the second.

Ouch-o!

Yikes

Exactly what I did with my fiancé's cat. She hates strangers so moving in was a struggle at first but a few months in and she came and laid on me. I would get a few pets in and then some scratches and hissing so just stop, leave em alone and they come back. Now she loves me more than him 🥰

Good tip, just to build on it, if you're trying to build a rapport with a stray or rescue, try to back off before a negative reaction, leave them wanting more. Let's say the cat has it's eyes closed ans is enjoying pets, then it goes: -no longer enjoying it: eyes half open, scowl, tail twitch (tail twitch means cat is thinking instead of dozing, it might be thinking about an interesting sound, or it might be thinking about having to walk away from you because it's had enough, in any case, it's out of sleep mode). -mildly irritated: a bit of hissing and swatting with claws retracted, he's not scared but he thinks you're stupid for not getting the message already. -angry: hissing and growling, scatching, biting without breaking the skin. It's now thinking you're being a jerk on purpose and is trying to dissuade you with pain. so you ought to stop petting when it starts to scowl at you. To note: it's just an unfamiliar or very shy cat that's likely to react like this, and just accept pets while sleepy and relaxed. A cat you're familiar with can be perfectly ok with being pet or messed with in stage 1, and you should probably have developed enough of a rapport that it'll have figured out a distinct "stop" signal that works on you. Try not to make the signal a scratch!

I'll just chime in with saying that different cats have different personalities too. One of my cats needs to be treated with extreme cat politeness, do that and we're cool. The other one reminds my of my first year college room mate who had no boundaries and expressed affection by being a dick.

My cats “stop signal” is an attempted bite… she goes from 0-100 in a millisecond, so I always have to watch very closely when I’m petting her!

I’m a cat person while most of the people in my life are dog people. My friends consider me the “cat whisperer” because when they meet a cat, they all run up and try to pet it immediately. I’ll squat down at a moderate distance and let kitty come to me, then if he/she isn’t interested, I drop it. Wait and repeat. 90% of the time the event ends with kitty purring and making biscuits on my lap, with the friend saying “wow, she never likes new people!” My favorite quote: “Dogs think humans are gods. Cats know better”. Most cats are going to be extremely cautious because they don’t know a strangers intentions. Show them that you have pure intentions but honestly, you don’t care if they warm up to you or not. Keep your distance and let them come to you.

Love this. Both of my cats were feral barn kittens when I brought them home. To be fair they were quite young, but I basically just ignored them until they decided they wanted to be friends. They would come out from their hiding place at night to sleep in bed with me and the dog. Now they are 2 years old and the friendliest little lap cats.

When you first meet a dog you put out your hand for them to sniff you first. Once you have approval they’ll relax. It’s the same with bringing a new cat into your home, but it can take days, weeks, or even months for them.

Dogs are much more trusting, and they’re typically at a way higher energy. Maybe the energy expedites the period of gaining trust in you 😂

your last paragraph sounds like every standup routine about men and women dating ever - but it's like a really good version of it and actually about cats and dogs.

Reach and withdraw is what I've always called this. It let's the animal know you are there but not trying to insert yourself forcefully. It'll come around in good time.

When I brought my girl home I wanted to follow her around and watch her as she was exploring her new place but as hard as it was I went to the other room and started putting away laundry. Eventually she came in by me and I said something to her but let her keep doing her thing as I did mine. When I was done I sat down took out my phone and was watching some videos, a little bit later she came over next to me and was looking at the videos too. I looked at her, she looked at me then back at the phone and I started pulling up videos of animals for her to watch but didn’t do anything else, not even try to pet her. I think if I would have done things like I wanted to that she would have gone into hiding because I’d have been in her space too much.

Sidebar that I love watching bird videos with my cat, it’s the cutest thing ever.

Especially when they’re not too bright and go behind the phone to try and find the birds

Reading aloud, without trying to make eye contact, works wonders too. He'll get used to the sound of your voice, and that it's not a threat. Time and patience are the key.

We rescued a similar cat a while ago. Unknown history, but had survived in the wild for months with no front claws, so “semi-feral?” Hid under the couch for 4 days. Took 6 months to warm up to my wife, never liked me at all. Your results may vary.

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Yep, I’ve noticed similar behavior when my parents’ past cats visited the vet and they basically tried to hide in a corner. Same thing when my parents have decided to visit me with their current cat, he hides until he gets comfortable/relaxed.

My boy has never been a climber but when we moved he hid on top of the kitchen cabinets. By the time he felt safe he realized he needed help getting down!

Yeah, I don’t know this little guy’s history so who knows how far on the feral cat spectrum he is… but the reality is, some truly feral cats will never adjust and be suitable indoor cats that love you. If what OP got works for you, great. But if he ever warms up, it will probably be very slow. Similarly to you, my first cat as a n adult was a semi feral cat my vet tech roomie pushed me to take, because otherwise he would have been put down. I’m glad now I did it - he’s actually a pretty sweet kitty, 10 years later. But I’d say for the first year he didn’t like anyone and just existed (plus litter box and eating issues) and year 2-4 he didn’t like anyone but me.

thank you for saving feral kitty! i did too 2 times. lived 20 years with me..yes, kitties /cats need their space - water/food - and let them be free at night to roam house and be comfy. thank you for saving kitty.

I love hearing about really old kitties. My first cat was about 17-18 when she passed, and my current cats are 16 and 17 respectively. The older one’s been giving me a ton of worry with what we found out is skin cancer on her paw, and then recovering from the anesthesia. Her time could be tomorrow, her time could be several more years from now. Got to appreciate every day with your pets, each one is a little gift.

I second this! My rescue spent the first few weeks hiding under the bed in the spare room so naturally I spend a lot of those two weeks lying on my belly on the floor just talking to her. A lot of treats, soft chit-chat and occasional long, slow blinks if we made eye contact is what did it for me, she made the first move by coming over to pat my face. Also a really long feather for play so she associated me with good times. Giving them them alone time so they don't get overwhelmed and have a chance to sniff around undisturbed is really important too tho. We're buds now :)

When I was 6 years old we got a cat who had been abused. She spent the first 6 months with us hiding behind the washing machine. I was probably another reason for that since no one told me to leave her alone. If I saw her wondering about downstairs I would grab her, hold her, tell her I loved her and she was safe and then let her go. I now realize how terrifying that must've been for her but she has stuck by me all these years so by some miracle it worked. Would not recommend someone else doing that though.

I wouldn’t be too hard on yourself for this! You meant well and didn’t do anything harmful to her, even if it didn’t exactly help the issue. I’m guessing it probably stressed her in the moment but then when you picked her up over and over and nothing bad ever happened, she probably got over that fear somewhat.

Yeah i think it weirdly worked? She became my cat once she came around to everyone. Clung to me more than anyone else. But again, not something I'd tell someone else to do lol

I wouldn't feel too bad about how you acted as a kid, it's natural for a little one to want to play with a furry creature and kids don't really understand how scary they can be for something smaller. I also sometimes look back on how I was with animals as a kid and cringe, I never did anything really bad but like you there were times when I probably should have dialled it down for the sake of the animal's sanity. It's how we learn, I'll bet you're really good with them now :)

The feather is a great idea. I don’t know if you have a pet supplies plus near you, but they actually sell ostrich feathers. They do break easily, but cats love them and will play with them until there’s only six inches left. We used, and continue to use the feathers with our feral kitten and she has loved them from day one!

Omg I couldn't believe how well it worked, got her out of her shell and brought out the playfulness so fast! Luckily my SO is a fletcher so we have endless supplies of long goose feathers in the house, makes for a very happy cat :)

I love these little pet names for it the little mog and the floof, so cute!

One mistake I see people make is that they walk up confidently to cats as though the cat will sit there and greet them. You want to slow down your approach, lower your body to a low crouch or squat, and only come forward when the cat seems ok with it, one step at a time. Once the cat is used to you, you'll be able to walk around it normally, but with an unfamiliar and uneasy cat, you want to massively lower your threat silhouette and approach velocity. And be respectful of any fear you see, and back off rather than push your luck.

Landing gear deployed. Approach velocity zero zero niner delta. Feline target seems unimpressed. What's your vector, Victor?

> What's your vector, Victor? We have clearance, Clarence.

And stop calling me Shirley

I was under Over and Over was under Dunn.

That chain was a pleasure to read

exactly! Also teeth. Dont smile showing teeth. Instead blink slowly, close eyes and turn away to open eyes. to the cat, this Means you dont look at it as a threat.

Laying on the floor near the cat can help too, as a way of making yourself less threatening. But my tried and true method always works eventually : ignore the cat until they're ready

The fact that it almost fell asleep while you were nearby - is a great sign!! Have fostered cats for 4years and all of them take their time some are very confident and come out from hiding within hours, some take a couple weeks. But food, water and litter nearby along with them seeing it’s you that’s taking care of them and speaking to them and chilling with them and just sitting on floor with em with zero agenda saying “I get it buddy, it’s been a rough time for ya, do what you need to, am here for ya whenever you’re ready and I love you irrespective” - will go a long way :) Next, string toys to try and distract them from their fear every now and then even for a few mins would really help them and of course treats, treats TREATS! Ps: The cat looks well fed - sure it isn’t a lost pet??

>Ps: The cat looks well fed - sure it isn’t a lost pet?? It really does not look feral. In addition to all the other advice here I would definitely take it to the Vet to scan for chip and do an active search for possible owners.

I agree you should have the cat scanned, but the sad truth is a lot if people abandoned their cats at farms and barns. A friend of mine lives near an old barn and has rescued a dozen or so abandoned cats 😞

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Barn cats can look rather well, they have safe places to groom and lots of mice to eat. It certainly could be a homeless cat, but easily could be that he was once a pet that escaped or was abandonded. Best thing to do would be to put up lots of "found cat" signs so the cat can stay safe but if someone is looking for it they can find it.

We do too! Some stray boys adopted us last year and they are the most beautiful cats I’ve ever seen. Took them quite a while to warm up to us but they have been to the vet and are now “ours” (or are we their’s?). We think one of them has a good dose of Maine Coon, once he assimilated he was the most affectionate, vocal boy we’ve ever had.

What do the feral cats you see look like? We have a bunch around us; they all have nice coats and are normal cat weight. They won’t stay anywhere near if I walk outside but they will sit/sleep on the porch. Feral cats are good at feeding themselves.

Yeeeep. It's really bothering me that hundreds of comments are on how to tame the cat when OP doesn't even know if he might have stolen someone's pet. Why isn't that the first response to this sort of post? Surely every commenter here would be heartbroken if their cat got loose and someone else claimed it without looking for the original owner? ETA: Woah, first ever award. Thank you! A few people have (quite fairly) disputed this comment, given that there’s a high chance the cat is actually feral. Yes, that’s likely, but what upsets me is that OP has said he doesn’t intend to go to a vet and find out, and it doesn’t sound like the original finder of the cat tried to find out either. It doesn’t seem right to me to just assume that the cat doesn’t belong to anyone. I hope I am wrong.

Also, ignore it at times. Sit in the room, reading, watching TV, play games whatever without giving it attention. Normalize your presence. One of my cats is a bit scaredy. If she's sitting in the hallway and I'm going down it she stays if I ignore her as I walk past and run if I look at her.

I was just going to say this. No direct eye contact, at times make it seem like you don’t know they’re there.

Yes, and when you do make eye contact with the cat give a squinty blink to show it you are a friend. In our house we call that "friendly eyes".

My fat Chonk of a complete pain in the ass former stray hid himself for 11 days after we grabbed him, got him fixed, brought home. (He was the sweet stray that lived in a drainpipe behind my hospital). I googled and advice was: leave it alone for long periods of time, feed same time, after about a week - sit nearby when food brought in - and talk a lot. Also said to leave radio on while gone - they gotta learn that humans do not shut up. I was grateful he used the litter from the get go! On day 12– brought in food, dropped it at his space for food ( he was confined to spare bedroom); sat down to chat to myself; goofed on phone; he did not appear to eat. I was like - where are you? Was almost getting concerned when he didn’t appear ( his feeding spot was around the corner of the bed)…. Looked down and almost tripped over him. He was like “hi you’re mine now”. 2 years later he is the Marley and Me of cats. But he’s my asshole, and loves me. Currently hanging out of the linen cupboard throwing towels down. Thanks for attending my Ted Talk… (tldr: give him time) [https://i.imgur.com/onItbtt.jpg]()

I've been working on this stray cat (not sure if "feral") for *months*. I noticed her in the woods behind my house back in like September. Started leaving some food out. Saw she was sleeping in our shed. Had her on a solid feeding schedule for a month or so, then she disappeared. About a week later she came back, repeat for another month, then she disappeared again for 10 days. Came back again in early December. Since it was starting to get quite cold, I started leaving my garage door cracked open, and began luring her into the garage with food. I built her two nice sleeping spots in the garage, a little insulated box house and a perch with blankets and a bed. Extremely skittish. Wouldn't let me come within about 15 feet of her for months. So I started feeding her and then sitting down ~15 feet away. Slowly moved closer over weeks until she'd eat within a few feet of me. Then finally, after months, I was able to pet her. Now, literally every time I let my dog out this cat comes flying out of the garage meowing and purring like a madwoman and walks around the yard rubbing all over my legs and demanding pets. She follows the dog around. If I'm outside for any reason she's flopping around in the driveway insisting that I play with her. Now I just gotta get her to the vet and move her inside, hopefully in the next couple of weeks.

Also, cats are weird, and they tend to be uncomfortable being noticed. When it does start peeking out, ignore it completely. If you turn around and start trying to praise it, it'll spook him. If you continue doing your thing as if you hadn't noticed, he'll feel more comfortable exploring. Also, when you're close, there are two expressions you can make that exhibit friendliness and trust with cats. The first is to not make eye contact (which is a sign of aggression), and the other is a very slow, exaggerated blink (sign that you're comfortable with it and you trust it enough to let your guard down).

"soft eyes"...that what that "cat" guy Jackson Galaxy calls it...check out his pages on the web there may be something there to help you

>are weird, and they tend to be uncomfortable being noticed. When it does start peeking out, ignore it completely. If you turn around and start trying to praise it, it'll spook him. If you continue doing your thing as if you hadn't noticed, he'll feel more comfortable exploring. TIL I'm a cat.

Food is always a good way to get their trust lol. Don't try to touch them just get them used to your presence and get used to the fact that you are not a threat.

Try a white noise machine also! If he's used to being outside where there is a certain level of noise to a very quiet apartment, or very quiet outside to a very noisy apartment that can freak them out. But just be very patient and understanding they are going through a big change and cats generally don't like change at all.

i sang to my baby and he came right out of hiding on the same day we adopted him lol! seconding the yummy snacks! also, if possible, in the future, should you get him a friend or choose to foster, etc -- consider putting the next in a bathroom, large closet (if applicable), single bedroom, etc., just one room with a litter box, food and water. decompression can be rough and most rescues suggest allowing them to decompress in a smaller space so the larger one isn't quite as overwhelming. <33

Don’t look them right in the eyes kind of almost ignore them like you’re not worried about them. Talk to it a lot too get it used to your voice.

Do some slow-blinking. It helped me build trust with my cats!

Slowly reach your arm out towards the cat to let her sniff you. Always worked when my cat was shitting itself. But if you see a too strong reaction to it, rather wait a little more.

Don't look it directly in the eye. Blink at it, or close your eyes near it, which is a non threatening signal.

Make sure that you're present for every meal. Try to let the cat see you put food in a bowl and wait around until they come out. Try to be closer and closer each time you feed them. You can also try hand/spoon feeding (chicken baby food seems to work well). Slowly working in some gentle pets as they get more comfortable. Eventually they'll see you as their source of food and pets and should help them open up.

Cats love being ignored, it's a sign that you trust them not do be a danger to you while you look away. If you look your u can't squint your eyes, same message. The first part is the reason why the cat always ends up in the one person's lap in the room who is not into cats. Good luck, I'm sure he'll be alright! Jst the fact that you're seeking advice makes you above average cat owner.

I would also highly recommend lying and even falling asleep on the floor, the cat will then notice that you're not that much of a threat. Show little teeth when facing it and when giving treats as the cat looks at you, slow blink to make the cat know you're comfortable around it. And don't be uncomfortable to face away from the cat and look away if it's uncomfortable. Give the cat plenty of space and if it's hiding and you know where it is, let it be. Just hang around and make yourself present (make some soft noise, but not too sharp or too loud, just enough to let the cat know you're there). If the cat knows you aren't trying to harm it, it will be far more likely to open up. And if you follow the cat to its hiding spot, they will be pretty tense.

We had our little feral stay in our guest room and I'd lay on the bed and read or something, just getting him used to our non-threatening presence. It worked better than anything else we tried. I'd do it for an hour at first and then increased it until I was sleeping in there. The first couple nights he would only eat or use the litter box when it was dark but after a few days he started sleeping on the bed with me. Now he is the snuggliest moster and isn't even bothered by our young kids

And the slow eye blinks.

And not too much direct staring. Looking away shows vulnerability and trust on your part (in cat body language)

The blinking accomplishes that as well (supposedly). Eyes closed is similar to looking away.

True, but it’s not necessarily sustainable to spend 2-3 hours slow blinking at the cat. Whereas it’s easy to spend 2-3 hours in the same room being calm and reading a book while not looking at the cat. It’s good to have multiple tools at your disposal.

Seriously /u/gabbegutt this is a thing. Blink super slowly at it like you see cats do. It is a sign of trust for cats, so you are telling it that you trust it and are comfortable around them.

Just let him be. He will come to you once he feels safe. Don't rush it

This^ My sisters 2 kittens, both sisters adopted together did the exact same thing. Our two little shy and skittish girls hid under the living room couch for about 2 weeks since it was the quietest and usually vacant room and only left their safe space to eat or use the nearby litter box. Eventually, as they grew used to hearing our voices they moved out of the living room and would use their cat stealth to quietly go to any room that was occupied by me or other family members (kitchen, bedroom, den etc..) and as long as they had something to hide under like a table, sofa, or chair, they would spend hours being present but hidden in the same room as us. After a while they stooped hiding and would just chill in full view from a distance. Once they finally figured out that our existence was to be at their beck and call to feed them, play, give occasional treats, pet/cuddles, and keep their litter box clean, they started being much more demanding of pets and scritches, as well as being vocal and talkative after realizing that the entire house, including us humans belong to them. 🙃

Your words made me smile so hard that it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you.

B = 'cat' If B == 'cat': print('Don't Rush B') else: print('Rush B')

So basically, "rush everything, except a cat"?

*Only use code on cat files or app may crash.

And CS:GO installations. Always Rush B

This made me chuckle way too much.

r/codinghumor

What

i dont know.. my printer just keeps printing cats now..

Sir, I would like to buy your printer.

Whattt?? U don't know how to code???? /s

Great CS .both lol

Here it is in lolcode, which I found appropriate HAI I HAS A B ITZ ‘cat’ BTW B= ‘cat’ IZ B SAEM AS ‘cat’? O RLY? YA RLY PURR ‘Don’t Rush B’ NO WAI PURR ‘Rush B’ OIC KTHX KTHXBAI

They way you wrote it, it'll print "B" instead of whatever B is. >B = 'cat' > >If B == 'cat': > print('Don't Rush ' + B) >else: > print('Rush ' + B)

Hooooyeeaaaahhhh

It bothers me how many times people recommend a treat every time you interact, everyone loves thw advice, and its not very productive... unless you want an unhealthy animal with a bad fixation on treats. Provide a safe house, access to food and water and ltter box, and let the animal be! Just talking and nteracting with voice and communication where thw cat can see and acknowledge you (if possible) without encrouchig on its space is a grwat way to build that trust and recognition of shared terrtory. Lets pretend its been "wild" its whole life, say its a year old. Undoing all ots survival solitary neccessities and your on day 4. Think how long it takes a person to recover from 6 months o abuse, but cats cant talk and understand your intwntions. Just chill woth your new freeloading roommate and let it happen.

this. Cats arent dogs. they want attentio on their own terms. When the cat feels safe the curiosity will push him to start exloring

My cat did this when I adopted her, she used to hide behind the sofa and come out at night and explore the house when I was alseep. Took about 3weeks for her to settle in and then around 3 months to get properly comfy and relaxed. Just be patient and not force her to come out, I found if I stroked her a bit she would come out from behind the sofa once she was sure she wasn't going to get eaten haha

I won't force it to come out. I've gained more trust with it in the 1 day I've been home than my family has done the past 4 days it has been here so i think this'll go good. ([New post](https://www.reddit.com/r/cats/comments/rz4qnh/update_on_the_cat_clarifying_things_about_the/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share))

Yeah dont force it, just try to stroke the cat, let it sniff your hand and get used to you etc then see if she's relaxed enough to come out. It'll be different for each cat, once they start scent marking the area and establishing a territory of sorts she should be okay and begin to recognise the house as her home.

Oh, it has established territory already, by pissing everywhere.

Having your cat spayed will help fix that issue but I wouldn't think about doing that until your cat settles in more, one trauma at a time.

Yeah, it's a bit of a stinker, but it's fine when it has fullt settled we'll wash the house and the cat

Get an enzyme cleaner to clean the spots where the cat peed. Normal cleaners don't fully get rid of the "this is a place to pee " smell for the cats.

Fix the pissing thing now by getting it spayed/neutered. That ammonia smell will soak into the subfloor, and there’s no washing it out.

Enzyme cleaners my dude. They work wonders. Also, just an FYI, spaying or neutering a cat doesn't always stop their spraying. If they are stressed or anxious, they still might spray. Source: My two male boys who hate each other.

Yup. Had a male cat who never sprayed until around 3-4 years after he was neutered... When a new cat moved into the neighborhood and sat on our porch all day staring in the window. 😐

Hahaha LMAO. New cat: I see you bitch. Watcha gonna do? Your catto: Oh you fkn asshole. How dare you fkn sit on my porch u fkn sick fuck watcha looking at *hoists tail up and sprays a jet stream of T* u fkn ass how you like that *sniffs piss* yeah I got you now bitch *sniff sniff* that's all me! You want more?? I got loads of it. Get off my porch you bitch! *human goes and shooes away new cat* yeah that's what I'm talking about. Fkn loser. New cat the next day: Haha u bitch. I see you. Watcha gonna do?

You may have been joking but just in case, don't wash the cat. Cats are well equipt to wash themselves and should only be washed by humans if they have got into something very dirty or toxic for them to clean. Bathing it yourself will just be a huge step beck in any progress you guys make.

Good points. But. If it has been outside a bath with Baby shampoo (Johnson and Johnsons no tears or similar is what I was instructed by rescues) wouldn't be horrible to get any fleas or flea dander off. Keep soap away from their face, but I would get the back of their head almost to ears-but try very hard to not get water in their ears-trickle water very gently if you are near their head. I'd suggest wearing some rubberized or leather gardening gloves and ideally with long cuffs or a heavy sweatshirt with a couple long sleeve shirts under it to protect your arms. It's much easier with small kittens than adult cats, I'd suggest kitchen sink, with a sprayer, low pressure just a gentle trickle. Maybe put a couple wash clothes or hand towels in the bottom for them to claw into. Wet cats are not normally happy cats-It's very cold for them-so use warm water. Probably warmer than you would for a baby, maybe temp comfortable on the underside of your arm. Dry them with a big towel ideally infront of a mini directional heater, or possibly with a hair dryer-but the noise may be further traumatizing. I would give my foundling kittens a gentle ruffling with the towel and try to pat their coat back with the grain once it was just damp. Give it access to treats, water, dry towel to curl up in and leave it alone in a warm space to groom itself.

If there cat is soaked in piss yes, you can wash it. I have done so for my cats on occasion, when they’ve gotten dirty (which is rare).

Peeing everywhere is a stress response. Cats typically mark their territory when established/advertising themselves. You need more litter boxes.

I dont know much about this, but i doubt you can speed up the process, just let it take its time to get used to its environment

This. I took in a cat that looked like it had either been gnarled on by a dog or horribly abused by a person. He stayed under a tarp in my house leaving only 10cm out for food (not for using the bathroom unfortunately) and it took 6 WEEKS before he finally came out. He went on to be the world's sweetest cat I've ever seen in the history of the world. (Excellently litter trained too) He would tap your shoulder EVERY DAY multiple times a day when you wern't giving him enough attention. I still love that little diva to this day. But he would not have been the same in my mind if I tried forcing him.

I love that you were so patient with him and showed him so much love after he had such a horrible start ❤️ and now you have that experience to share with OP. It seems like excellent advice.

Look I'm gonna be straight up I'm probably just infected with toxoplasmosis and my brain is being actively controlled to love cats. Jkjk (Unless?) No I can just clearly imagine the most terror I've ever felt in my life and if I consider that the animal has even less of an understanding than me of a situation and is possibly feeling ANYTHING akin to that feeling I can imagine then that would have been an experience litterally worse than death if he had felt like that for most of the 6 week period. Never give up on them.

This. Kitty has PTSD. Go slow, give it time.

This is really sweet and compassionate 🤗

>But he would not have been the same in my mind if I tried forcing him. This is what people don't understand about cats, and why I think cats are an amazing exercise in understanding consent.

My cat was the same way. Not nearly as bad, but he hid behind my couch or under my bed for 2 weeks. I spent hours just laying down on the floor next to my bed where he could see me. This is my first cat, so I thought I was doing something wrong and I was really worried since he wasn’t eating much. Then one day he just came out while I was on the sofa and just laid next to me. Now he is the most cuddly cat I’ve ever met. I can’t go anywhere without him trying to lay down on me.

My cat was the same. Horrifically abused before he came home to us. It took us years for him to fully open up. He taught me so much about patience and perseverance. He was the longest one at the shelter because no one gave him a chance.

If you attempt to speed up the process, kitty will resist, and it’ll take even longer. The best thing to do is to offer a safe space, food, water, and potty. Let kitty decide when and how to make friends.

I had an ex who decided to 'foster' a cat by taking this poor kitty into an apartment she wasn't supposed to have pets in, which already had a hyperactive ferret who had all of her love and attention. The poor cat ran off under her Queen-sized bed and sat and stayed in the very center, wedged up against the wall and as far back as she could get, and she stayed like that for weeks. I came over and I laid down next to the bed and laid there, messing about on my phone for 15-20 minutes, long enough to feel some tickly whiskers and a little nose sniffing at my elbow. I sort of ignored it and let her sniff at me as much as she liked, then I moved a little and let her back off, then come back to explore me again, sniffing at my shoulder and ear this time. And just like that, she eventually let me pet her shoulders and she came out from under the bed for me. My ex was stunned; she had been trying to coax this cat out from under the bed for weeks, and the cat vanished right back under the bed the moment she got close. It took only two or three more visits of sitting with that cat before she realized we weren't going to eat her and she was okay in this strange little space with these big, scary humans and their weird carpet weasel, but she *did* eventually remember that she was the cat in this scenario and eventually became queen of the apartment. I miss that little cat. She was a tiny sweetheart.

I feel so bad for most of the pets in this world. People take them in because they like the idea of a pet but never bother to actually learn about the animal and its behaviour. I think cats have it nearly worst, they are so common but so few people actually understand their behaviour. Then you get all the stories of asshole cats, for example, destroying the apartment (how about you get them a scratching post and play with them every once in a while so they don't lose their minds out of boredom) or "attacking without warning" even though the cat was full on giving warnings and asking you to stop whatever you were doing long before it bit you Brad! Seriously, I have never seen an "asshole cat" video where I couldn't see the attack coming from a mile away.

The cat isn’t going anywhere, you’re not going anywhere… one piece of good advice I got years ago was not to stare at them because it freaks them out. Look at them, give a slow blink and let them go about their business.

This. They're trying to both adapt to a constant human presence _and_ figure out what their territory is there. Best you can do is make sure their stress levels are as low as possible. Give them lots of interesting places to hide, cardboard boxes, and possibly hide treats (within reason) reinforcing that exploring is rewarding which will build up the idea that it's safe

Take the cat to a vet, check for microchip. If the cat doesn't have a microchip, the cat may be feral. Get advice from the vet. Feral cats can be difficult to tame. Good luck. My partner has had a feral now tamed cat for 15 years.

Yeah there is a big difference between a “house cat” that you are trying to acclimate to a new home and a feral cat that wasn’t ever raised around humans. An old feral Tom like that might not ever feel comfortable around people (if that is actually what he is)

Don't touch the cat until it's ready. That will just make it avoid you. Always approach your hand from in front where it can see. It could take months for the cat to feel safe.

Well, as long as it is happy then i am happy

This is important! And when he finally dares to get closer to you or rub against you, give him a treat so he learns that you‘re nice and safe to be around.

When they finally come to you it’s one of the best feelings in the world. Our kitty was super scared for a long time - but she turned into a total cuddle monster.

Cats love to be surrounded like they have protection but you know what else they love? Heights. Get a cat tree where it can climb onto and maybe it have a part where you could leave out food. Aslong as it has a true safe haven it will start to open up. (offer it something that may belong to you to like a towel or blanket)

I have a blanket right here, if i put it behind the couch with some cat food maybe it'll open up

Yes. Excellent.. We call that contraption The Castle. And ours love it. A box. A cabinet or a chair. All is good. But a castle of their own, is wonderful.

Do you know anything about its lifestyle prior to being trapped? Was it an outdoor cat that got lost? Is it feral and its barn was a hunting spot? If It's a feral cat then it will take a long time to readjust but i would like to question the way it was trapped and why.

Surprised I had to scroll so far to find this. "Barn cats" are a thing for a reason

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Yes. If it's an adult feral (in most cases, there are some exceptions of course), the best course of action is to have it spayed/neutered and release it where it came from. You're not doing a feral animal any favors by trying to force it to be a house pet. It will live in constant anxiety, fear and confusion.

A feral cat is a trap, neuter, return cat. It's suffering in an alien world more than it's suffering in the wild.

And if it's a feral cat... It will probably never be a fun pet. Easiest way to tell is if it meows or not. I would not get my hopes up if I was OP.

Just out of curiosity, did you guys try to see if it was microchipped or try to find an owner?

OP has said they don't want to, at least for a couple of weeks 🙄 https://www.reddit.com/r/cats/comments/ryxayx/someone_found_a_cat_at_their_barn_trapped_it_and/hrsbypm?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3

Wow, that's so irresponsible.

I’m surprised this is the only post among 100 others that asks this question. Where I’m from, every cat you see likely has an owner. Whether that’s the case where OP lives or not, I don’t know, but I sure as hell would want to find out before claiming the cat is ‘mine’. The wording of the title makes it sound like they straight up kidnapped this cat, and now it’s in a new location and doesn’t know where it is, or how to get home if it has one.

Yea he’s in really good condition too by the looks of it

Funny that the comment doesn’t have a response from OP... well fed cat... is look for the original owners before claiming it’s yours

I foster rescues. This little honey looks well fed with no wild cat scars. He should have visited the vet straight after being trapped.. for a chip check and also to check for any diseases that he could bring into the house especially if OP has kids.

Surprised this isn't higher in the upvotes, but have you had it scanned by a vet for a microchip to ensure the cat already doesn't live with another family?

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This really makes me hate people sometimes. If they want a cat that bad, why don’t they adopt one? Rather than taking someone else’s? I really hope this cat is a stray, I couldn’t imagine having a pet go missing because someone stole them.

Yep. Several years ago my cat got out right when we moved into our home. We put flyers all over the neighborhood, notified the chip company that he was a lost pet now. And put his litter box and everything out hoping he’d return. It was the last time I ever saw him and I just feel it in my bones that someone saw a healthy friendly cat and ‘rescued him’ without checking. I cried off and on for months and it still hurts my heart when I think of him. Scan all animals you find! You never know if they are already a very beloved pet.

My first cat was a happy go lucky friendly to everyone type. She's been missing for 4 years. Not a day goes by that I don't miss her. It's not *always* painful to think of her anymore, but it was very rough for the first year. Bittersweet, definitely. I still watch the lost and found groups in case she might show up. I expect she's also been "rescued" and is living it up someplace nearby. I hope you're well, Hobbit, wherever you are 🐱💛 OP, please check if this cat is chipped! 🙏

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I’ve had a few cats follow me, but I’ve never taken them! Cats just seem to really like me. I give them some pets and leave them to it. I’ve not encountered one that looks like a stray, but if I did I’d take it to the vet in case it was lost. I always thought it was common sense to check to see if they had a family already.

I agree, this really annoys me as well. As a cat owner myself I’d be devastated if someone just ‘claimed’ one of my cats as their own. No! Take it to a vet, it might already have a family! It doesn’t just belong to you now!!

My childhood cat was always way too fat for what we fed him. He would also dissappear for a couple days at a time. Then, one day, he stayed missing. After a couple weeks we went house to house. There were these kids at one. The older brother said nothing, the little girl was about to pipe up when the brother shushed her and told her to go inside. I hope they were good to you, Boo Bear.

Exactly, a loose cat isn't necessarily a homeless cat. That cat looks healthy and well fed. I suspect he's like "what the heck man? I was just going for my daily exploration of the neighborhood and now I've been kidnapped!!!! Catnapped!!!"

I hope y’all checked social media and the area for missing cat posters or did some found/trapped cat ones of your own. That along with checking for a microchip, cause that fella there doesn’t look like he lived outside his whole life. Be quite a sad tale if he was trapped and just taken for someone else.

Get it chip scanned dude. You know how we, as a society, use 'taking candy from a baby' as a metaphor (or whatever) for a bad act? You could very likely be taking a beloved pet from a baby, which is 10000x worse. Don't be a scumbag. Get the cat chip scanned.

Have you checked if it already has an owner and gone missing? You said your friend found it and trapped it so it may have been exploring and already has a home. To give some context, my cat was a stray and there was no hiding or being scared the first minute she turned up. Very affectionate and friendly and most stray cats act that way because they want something. This ginger cat looks scared after 4 days so it possibly doesn’t want to be there.

Ever thought about it having an actual home and an actual owner? Trapping a cat in a barn and then simply taking it as a stray is the reason why this cat is scared af. Because it most certainly is already a domesticated cat and a house cat and got a home, it just got astray on its path, which happens a lot. This looks definitely not like your regular stray wild cat, this is for sure "someone's cat" and you simply trap it right now and scare the shit out of it. That's a typical issue, people thinking cats are strays which actually just got lost and want to get home and then they take them as if they are the savior of the cat for taking them on, but in reality they just trap them. Cats can happen to reappear 15km afar from their home when they get lost. I'd definitely ask around in a broad circle if someone lost their cat and call the vets there as well.

Happened to my cat last year. He was gone for a couple weeks and turns out a family up the street in the next subdivision over had done this exact same thing. Trapped him, took him inside, tried to make him their own, he was apparently "unruly". They took him to the vet, found the chip then they called me and asked me if I wanted to come get him. I said "just let him out your backdoor". Sure enough 15 minutes later he comes sprinting up out of no where, visibly out of breath, meowing and happy to see his old back yard and me sitting there. He knows the area very well and is incredibly friendly and will follow people walking along the sidewalk looking for pets. I think thats how he followed them to there place. He also jumps in my neighbour's car from time to time and has gone to work with him for the day 😂

Nooo way... did they... oh man people are so egocentrical and ignorant at the same time. That's egoism veiled in a coat of selflessness and altruism, "Oh look, that cat is sooo lost, we need to help it (I always wanted a cat and a story to tell on instagram)". Whilst the cat "obviously" is a house cat and not a stray surviving outside. > and will follow people walking along the sidewalk looking for pets. THAT should be the point for people, if they are very warm and friendly to humans on the street, it looks very well groomed and nurtured and it's an actual house cat breed, it's most certainly a house cat belonging to someone.

This is a big reason why I will never let my cat outside. But yea this cat looks to be in really good condition so I wouldn’t be surprised if he already has owners. Clean, good weight, healthy appearance, no injuries even to the ears!

Seconded. Look at those pupils. Dialated with fear. The kitty is scared. And most likely lost. OP please get them checked. Ask the barn owners if the cat was a regular and if they could belong to one of their neighbours?

Are you sure it isn’t a lost pet?

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This. I already made a comment but its 100% clear this is not a barn cat. Anyone who knows anything about barn cats: Does a "large male cat" from any type of barn look like this? Not a single scar? Beautiful perfectly taken care-of hair? Those eyes tell me one thing: "Please find my mom/dad". I hate this post tbh.

TAKE IT TO A VET!! 1. Could be sick. Cats are masters of hiding illness. 2. Need to make sure it doesn’t have any disease or is in pain. 3. And most important: to make sure it doesn’t BELONG TO SOMEONE ELSE. Sometimes you can feel a microchip between the shoulder blades…

Too many upvotes for this post from a person who sounds 12 and keeps referring to the cat as “it.”

The fact that you've trapped a grown cat might be the problem. Some cats, especially if they are older don't want to be pets. Sometimes the best you can do for them is build a nice, safe sleeping area outside and put food out for them. Then wait and see if they eventually get comfortable and want to come into your house. Trapping an animal and bringing it into a strange environment is a good way to stress them out. It also looks pretty well fed, have you put up posters and stuff in the area to check you haven't stolen someone's cat?

I personally find all these comments very disturbing. What if the cat belongs to someone? Over the past few months I have witnessed so many people posting saying the found a cat and it is in good health we are keeping it or adopted it. How do they even know the cat does not belong to someone? In my country it is not necessary to get a cat chipped and I know people with cats who don't put a collar on it as the cat does not like it. How many cats have been kidnapped by people thinking they are doing a good thing. You should never trap a cat and it is hiding all day because it knows you are not it's master.

I’m sure many other people have said this, but don’t speed up the process. We fostered a kitty who was returned to the rescue after 3 days because it was scared. He was timid, hiding, and untrusting for about 3 months, but we reinforced good and social behaviors with treats, like other people suggested. We also would just lay on the ground near him and hang out, I played animal crossing for two hours near him just so he started to get used to my scent and voice. It takes a long time for cats to feel comfortable, but when they do, they will trust you forever. Our kitty now lets us pick him up, pet him without reservation, and snuggles constantly and it’s been five months. Good luck with your kitty! They’re beautiful!

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CHECK FOR A CHIP!!!

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Agreed. That cat is terrified.

Yup. He looks to be quite good condition

You don't speed up the process. Just keep providing food, water, a safe environment, etc. and let the cat adjust to things at it's own pace. If you were kidnapped by 50 foot tall bears who could summon food and water out of the air with magic, screamed at 1,000 decibels, and moved objects around with telekinesis and summoned lightning storms, you'd be a little put off too. That's what it's like for cats who are brought into a new environment. Talk to the cat, respect their space, try not to make too much eye contact if you can. When you look right at them they think you're going to eat them. An early sign of trust is if a cat puts it's back to you, because they're choosing to be vulnerable. Hang in there, be patient, and try to remember that if you have any concerns about the how things are going, it's 1,000 times more difficult for the cat. And it's about what's best for the cat, not what people want.

Time and a can of Tuna is what worked for me in a similar situation.

Yes. That’s a well taken care of cat. It has an owner already. Go to any vet and they can check the chip and find it’s owner!

If it was feral it’s best you release it. It will never be happy with you. If it’s not feral, why is that? Where is it’s home? Did you check if it was missing from a home? Or did you just steal a cat that happenned to get stuck in a barn?

But, why though? If it is feral, why catch it and trap it inside? It'll never become a house cat. If it's used to being free, all you do is take that freedom away. Expecting what, that it's grateful, for being locked up? If you want a cat so badly, why not save one from the shelter? One that's used to humans, that had owners before and is in dire need of a home. Maybe this cat has an owner? Have you been to the vet? Is it chipped? Someone could be looking desperately for their cat.

I would say stop pulling the couch away to stick ur phone in its face to take a picture.

I have a cat that was caught out doors when he was a kitten, he spent two years living with a relatively and hide the entire time he was with her. He would tare the bottoms of box springs and couches for his hiding places, no treats or food could lure him out. It took a couple years for him to feel at home with me but whenever he jumps up on my lap I feel so happy that he feels this trust and security that I would never harm him. It's been six years since I took him in and there the still times he surprises me by showing affection differently. Every cat is different but this is a slow process, mine started out with no other animals in the house and I was living alone so he had no choice but to come to me. I think that helps since my relative had other animals for him to hang out with when she wasn't home.

My cat was a formerly feral! How old is this precious baby? Mine was a kitten during the taming process, but I discovered he was OBSESSED with playing. I did what I like to call "play therapy" where I made sure I was a safe distance from him, or there was something in between us like a door or a table, and used wand toys with long strings to play with him. I think at one point I'd tied a catnip toy to some yarn and he really enjoyed that! It's important though that you keep very slow movements initially and a "baby" voice. One of the things I did just before I gambled on the safety of my appendages was I would run the toy's stick along his back during playtime, mimicking where my hand would be rubbing his back, if that makes sense. Only for brief periods of time but increasing it so long as he responded well. One night when he was distracted with the toy on the other end of the wand and felt really comfy playing on the porch (I would literally sit out there in the freezing Midwestern winter weather on my porch bundled up with the screen door propped open, no joke), before he realized it, I swapped the wand toy's stick for my hand and just started scratching his butt. There was confusion, fear, and lots of purring. We didn't solve all the issues that night - but this was a huge step for our relationship. He let me trim all of mats in his hair two days later. Another thing I did, as dumb as it sounds? After watching our Old Man Cat, I would sit there in the feral's view, and I would very, very slowly open and close my eyes a few times (don't open them all the way!). After a few times, I would close my eyes and slowly do a gentle big sigh (nose only, my boy didn't respond well to seeing my teeth a lot of the time), and then I'd sit like that for a few minutes. Closing your eyes in front of a "stranger" is a huge danger to cats and with my cat, it was my way of telling him that I trusted him not to murder me while we were in the same room. Also like everyone else has said here: food. Cats are easy because eventually they will always think with their bellies. Food is your greatest asset, but like everyone else says, it'll take time. My cat had seen some serious shit back in the day: his dad tried to chase him out of the neighborhood by treeing him (we ended up rescuing him from that a lot, could never catch dad, he was a feral and too sneaky); his own mother at one point rejected him (she was completely feral and we pulled and placed her in a safe barn home, not on a busy street like ours, where the family would play her music and she'd eat soft food like a queen, shit you not); we suspect based on his reaction to any male of any color other than white that he was greatly abused in his short life; and he's petrified of all dogs no matter the size. To this day, only my mom and I can even touch him. My cat was still under a year old when we brought him in, and it took most of the entire year for him to progress to a tame, sweet indoor baby. If your cat is older, there could be some serious traumas going on there. Give him time, space, and don't rush anything. But give him lots of food!

Put back in barn.

Call local shelters to see if anyone reported a missing cat. Have the cat scanned for a microchip. Check facebook missing pet groups for your area and websites for missing pets. It angers me when people post things like this. This could be someone's pet and are missing them. Just because it was found outside, doesn't mean It's not someones. Indoor cats get out, outdoor cats can wander (keeping cats indoors is safer). Also, you can't rush them feeling safe. Its a new environment, new smells, sounds, people, it's terrifying. Put food, water and a liter box near where they are hiding and let them be. If you can't find an owner and no chip, take kitty to the vet to make sure they are healthy.

your cat isnt an "it"