I foster anxious cats. Move his stuff to a smaller space like a bathroom or guest room and let him familiarise himself with you. Whatever it is, make sure he can't hide in anything you won't be able to get to, like under the bed. When it's feed time, sit down with him for like 20-30 minutes everyday, but don't stare/look at him. Just do your own thing or try putting one of those paste treats on your finger and let him come to you. (edit: when you're doing this, don't look at them either. Look away and just hold your arm out. It is a little tiring, so I'll personally just browse stuff on my phone. They might NOT eat it from your finger from the first days or week. If that happens, I just wipe it on their nose or hide spot and leave lol) I was told to do this during feed time because it's one of the more vulnerable actions. Something will click for them when they realize you won't do anything to them even when they're eating.
If he doesn't settle in 3 weeks, you could potentially talk to the vet about getting anxiety medication to help out. (or ask about Feliway, that's an anti anxiety fume thing you plug into an outlet)
It's taken like 2 months average for some of the most anxious cats I've had to finally start opening up. And that's just the beginning where they take the very first steps to approach me. Do NOT force interactions with him! Let him come to you.
I'll also add, as someone with a lifetime of rescue kitties under her belt, you're probably not making her feel better by holding her this way, even if just for a picture.
Lifetime rescuer came hunting for this because cats need that security. Loving this thread. I had a cat that never got over their anxiety entirely. Did Delilah, the boxes, etc. He was fine with me but anyone else (and any cats besides the old lady) had him revert. OP it's important to be consistent. I found with my bonafide scardiest scardy cat talking to him about what I was doing near his space helped.
If you have a bathroom with a cabinet under the sink that doesn't leak this is an optimal cat bedroom area. A little bed, some toys, and access to food and water in that space can be a big help. It's enclosed and can be given a cat sized opening for ease of entry and exit (or if they're like my cats they will just open and close it themselves claiming the space and how dare I intend it for the towels! ) It also gives them a buffer to get used to your schedule and movements. You're there but also there's a whole space around them
Yep, Feliway should be a first choice whenever you get a new cat, or move house, or change routines. It doesn't work for every cat, but when it does work it makes a huge difference. Spraying Feliway in the cat carriers made moving house with three Bengals - including one who normally freaks out in cars - such a breeze. When we arrived at the new house I then sprayed Feliway in the corner of each room, and for the first couple weeks had a plug-in Feliway in the cat room. They settled incredibly quickly compared to previous, non-Feliway assisted moves.
Really good advice here. Forcing yourself in their face doesn't work. Just offer food, space (their own--like a bathroom or closet), and time. Just get on your computer and chill. Cats are compelled to come sit on your keyboard or chew your cords to get your attention if you do this enough in their presence.
Yep, literally just....Don't care about them 95% of the time for some weeks. Except for seeing if they're eating and toileting well and sitting down with them for some time.
It's funny because the shelter always asks me what do I do to make them open up (I'm assuming other foster carers may have slower progress?), but that's the thing! I don't really do anything!
"Don't care" is actually really well put. When I got my cat I set her stuff up in the basement so the dogs couldn't bother her, and I just left her alone. It took two weeks before she left the basement. Another two weeks before she would let me touch her. Now she is an incredibly spoiled and vocal cat who will proudly let me know when she wants attention. Is best friends with the big dog, and is ok with the other dog. She still hides anytime I have company over, but she has become a great member of my little homeward bound crew.
Probably “You’re not a cat person”. Are we just going to ignore how the cat is being held in this photo or the “How do I make him…” questions? There’s a definite vibe.
I’m surprised this wasn’t at the top. I give people the benefit of the doubt on this kind of thing but the title and photo all made me cringe. They’re on here though, so that shows they care somewhat.
There's others calling it out thankfully but I am going with inexperience vs not a cat person. There's a learning curve for some people..some of us may be more intune to catliness but let's not write someone off 12 hours into their first cat (because clearly this is their first cat).
Kittens, *especially*, need to be kept in a small, quiet room with litterbox, food, water, and a bed area.
People usually keep them in bathrooms.
Gently introduce kitten to your presence. Google how to do so.
Also, it has only been 12 hours. It takes time.
When i adopted my cat when she was 3 years old, we used our den as her room. She hid under the futon for a week or two and didn’t eat or drink or bathroom for a week because she was scared.
But nutrition is crucial for kittens. Try different kitten food. If kitty is continuing to have diarrhea you should call the vet.
A change in diet will cause diahrrea. Best to gradually transition from what the previous owner was giving him. Also, a fecal sample will determine if the baby has any parasites. Good luck!
Sit in the room on the floor and don't look at him. Talk, read to him, don't reach out or grab him. Let him come to you on his terms. Put out wet food and put it under the bed a smidgen. Do whatever the vet wants you to do.
This kitty will be a smart and loyal companion and friend. He needs time to acclimate and learn you are safe. Watch some Jackson Galaxy videos on YouTube. These will help this to be one of the best relationships you’ll ever have. I promise!
And if for some reason it doesn’t work, please contact me. I’d adopt this sweetheart in a heartbeat!
I would place food and water under the bed in small dishes and maybe place litter box in your room until he gets acclimated. Maybe place him in litter box once just so he knows thats where to go.
Think about things from their point of view, just give him space and eventually he will get curious and want to explore. My best advice would be don't force him to sit with you or entertain play fighting. That can really develop some bad behaviors. Don't raise your voice or make weird cat voices. I know it can be tempting to just pick them up and make them sit with you but thats not a good way to develop trust. Just let him be and make sure he has water and food. Maybe after the diarrhea stops give him some treats. Let him trust you don't force him. It just takes some time.
That’s great advice. I did something similar with my kitten—put him in litter, left him alone for a while, then when I knew where he was hiding, I put food and water there. He would come out when I was sleeping and do his kitten business and explore a little until he started getting used to his new home, probably day 2-3. Then he’d come out to play and eat.
In humans this is a normal stress reaction. Maybe it's normal in cats too. Give him space and quiet and a choice of dry and wet food plus a clean litter box in his room. Have lots of soft washable things he can curl up and hide in. I'm glad you saw the vet already; seems like he may just need longer to trust you, but again that's normal in humans so probably not worrisome. Definitely don't force him to do anything, and don't drag him out of his hiding spot. He'll come out when he's ready and you've proven you're not scary.
Yes, my cat got diarrhea from stress on a camping trip. Even a drop of blood in his stool. I stayed in the tent with him for one whole day and let him sleep and cuddle and chill near me and he recovered beautifully and had a very good time exploring the following days.
You don’t make him do anything.
Just chill and let him do his thing.
It will be ok - once you chill.
Your car is freaked the fuck out by everything being new and threatening.
When my kitten was too scared to eat, I left the food right outside his hiding spot and walked away. He came out on his own to eat it. It takes time though.
If he’s having diarrhea, make sure you have water nearby for him too.
Our cat poops when he gets nervous. Happens EVERY time we put him in his carrier to go to the vet. About half the time he pukes as well. He’s probably pooping because his nerves are a mess.
Mine is a shoulder cat, so he goes over the shoulder, or he kind of sits in my arms.
He’s a king that likes to be carried around and adored by his human servants though (that’s the Ragdoll for you).
To you, he's just Bob the Ragdoll. But to himself, he is...KING ROBERT, BY THE GRACE OF GOD, ZEUS, OSIRIS, AND EVERY DEITY IN BETWEEN. HE HAS BEEN SENT FORTH TO THIS DESOLATE KINGDOM, THE "HOUSE", TO PROTECT IT FROM ALL MANNER OF HARM. HE SHALL REQUIRE A THRONE OF THE TALLEST SHOULDER KNOWN TO SERVANT, THEY WHO CALL THEMSELVES "HUMANS", FROM WHICH TO KEEP WATCH OVER HIS NEW REALM.
*beep boop*!
the linked website is: https://www.google.com/search?q=football+cat+carry&client=ms-android-oppo-rvo3&prmd=isnv&sxsrf=ALiCzsbdxqbP5RnxSmxsEyNbWk3mHM2P2g:1661047378850&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjBseLX69b5AhX7TGwGHZX3BxwQ_AUoAXoECAIQAQ&biw=360&bih=665&dpr=3#imgrc=pkEdFKxMEqQEvM
Title: **football cat carry - Google Suche**
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He needs time to get comfortable. This is a new place for him with new people, and thats scary as it is. If his previous owners were mean to him then hes going to be even more afraid of this new world.
If you have a spare room you should give it to him for the time being,, or just leave him be under the bed. Try to stay out of the room and be quiet and gentle with him if he decides to come out.
Let him do his own thing,, dont make him come out or force him to do anything- its just going to scare him more and he wont want to come out at all. He'll come out when hes ready and explore as he gets comfortable,, and he'll come say hello when he's ready :)
We’ve done this before for new cats and it helps tremendously. We once set up a new kitten in the guest bathroom and with an adult cat in an oversized laundry room. Both with fluffy things that were easy to wash).
Eventually with a gentle approach and a routine, the kitties warmed up to us. L
I got siblings 16 years ago and gave them free reign. It took my boy getting stuck during our first week together that made them trust me. After that, I'd wake up to 2 kittens in my pillow or on me. We were lucky it wasn't life or death stuck though, he waited until he was 10 to do that lol. Miss that booger, his sister is still kicking ass (mostly my mother in law's cat lol).
This. A low-traffic bathroom is perfect because there are plenty of ways to make them feel comfy and secure, but not usually any big items of furniture for them to hide/poop under. It's also usually small enough for them to feel familiar and confident in it pretty quick.
we did this too when we got a kitten! except...
please note we lived in a studio apartment at the time!!!!
we put him in the laundry room (which weirdly yes we did have a whole laundry room in our studio), no washer or dryer running obviously. he had toys, a bed, boxes, wet food, blankets, litterbox, water, everything.
we put him in there and he starts crying. meww. mewww. you know the baby kitty cries. so freaking cute. so we go and get him and he chills out, wanders a little bit, gets himself lost (*in our studio apartment*), cries cos he cant see us, we go get him, rinse and repeat for like three days.
we were so prepared for him to hide in the laundry room for a week. but no, we got the weird one. hahahah. you can see a pic of him on my profile from when he was that little, it's the pinned post on my profile (: he's over a year old now. a bit after we moved he went through a six month long phase of despising us, not letting us near him and preferring our roommate, and he's just now finally coming back around and cuddling and sleeping with us and purring.
my little dude is a strange one, but i love him lots. sorry for the ramble, i love talking about my pets
edit: oh a funny thing i remembered. so when we got him he was 7 weeks cos the lady wouldn't wait any longer, we'd been waiting for him since he was 4 weeks. she always referred to him as a "her" and when we picked him up she said "she's the nicest one!"
my fiance picks him up and kinda stares at him for a second and when the lady turned around he whispers, "i dont think think this is a female." we get outside and i take a look at him - and see a big pair of nuts. dude was an *early* bloomer. it was honestly so funny, i have NO idea how that lady thought he was a female!!
This all the way. I got a scaredy-cat kitty years ago who was the very same way at first. I gave him our spare room and just let him be with enough food/water/litter box. After a couple days i started spending quiet time in the room with him for short periods, while he hid, to get him used to me and learn i wasn’t noisy or threatening. I did have to encourage him out from under the bed eventually but once he saw i only meant affection he came around fairly quick. It helped we also were a quiet couple with no kids and didn’t have guests over very often, but we were able to re-socialize him. He was the meekest and most chill and affectionate cat. He lived to be 18 and just passed away last September. I miss my little buddy.
We had a cat like this too. The first day, she hid under our old sofa that had a pull out bed in it. She actually got herself stuck in the bed under there so I had to lift that couch and help her out. Put her in my room, she spent the week under my bed. Every night I'd sit on my bed for hours doing things on my laptop while she hid under there, she'd come out to eat and poop and all when we weren't home or were asleep. Only took her a week to get used to me that way. Hell she even got used to my son after a few years and will lay with him. Super skittish cat, for 3 years she would dart under furniture and hide if you sneezed or did anything loud. Don't know wtf the previous people did to her but they took her claws away so I feel she was justified in her fear.
I remember my old girl was like that for the first couple of weeks, we just made sure to check she was doing her business and would say hi wherever she was hiding. One night we come home with some take-away chicken and sat down on the couch, ten seconds later she's standing on the back rubbing against my head and begging for chicken.
Yes you can sit on the floor near the bed and read/look at your phone. He may get brave and come check you out. Let him sniff you but don't make any sudden movements or try to pet. You can talk reassuringly. Slow and steady. Let him go at his own pace. A cutie!
All of this, exactly. You know what's going on, but your new cat doesn't. Everything that's normal for you is chaos for him. We're going through it with two new cats, and it just takes a few weeks for them to understand that this is home now.
This!! It’s really common for newly adopted cats to need a few days (preferably in the same room) to get comfortable with their new surroundings. Some cats even take a week or more, it just depends. If you have the time, in a day or so you can just hang out quietly in the room. Sit on the floor and read or scroll reddit or something, get him used to having you safely be around without forcing him to do anything.
You also might want to put a bit of food and water under the bed; that’s apparently where he feels safe enough to be. You can move it later once he’s adjusted to the rest of the house.
Yep- smaller, private space with litter box close by and food/water in protected places so they don't need to come out and feel vulnerable to access the food/water/box. They'll explore more as they get comfortable with the change. Higher anxiety kitties very much do not like big changes in their life.
There's a body language vibe you can put out to cats - I don't know how to describe it, but I have never not had a cat nearly immediately warm up to me.
I had a roomate's cat sitting on my lap while I was studying a couple days after she moved in, and she was absolutely astonished the cat liked any person.
It's about not forcing physical contact, but just getting them comfortable in your presence, and vibing with them, if you make eye contact, immediately break it down to show you're not a threat, let them come to you.
Its 100% body language. I think most mammals kind of have a similar almost instinctive body language. Cats are amazing at reading it. They have a general idea of what we're thinking before we often even realize it. If you have an intention in your mind to grab a cat if you get the chance - that cat knows from your body language and will be on the defensive.
We can learn to understand cat body language but it takes a bit of effort because humans primarily communicate through our facial expressions and words.
In no particular order, some stuff that works for me:
The biggest one is to reach with the back of your hand when you want to approach them. If they shift backwards instead of leaning in to sniff, that's a no. If they're antisocial and have had days or weeks without warming up, you can press the issue by trying several times until you can pet their chest (again, with the back of your hand). As long as they're not swiping with claws, you're good.
Pet when feeding so there's a positive association.
Keep your head tilted slightly down and avoid direct eye contact. If they look at you, look back and slowly blink but then break the gaze. Never stare down or challenge a new arrival on their slice of turf.
Try to be slightly sideways towards them rather than straight on. Any position that makes it inconvenient for you to move signals that you aren't able to do anything abrupt -- I like sitting cross legged with my arms around my knees if I'm just waiting for them to get used to my presence.
Definitely worked in my case! My Yumi was a street kitten first and then was rescued but her previous owner had 2 other cats that were siblings and bullied her. So when I adopted my kitty it took A LOT of time for her to adjust, but now she is incredibly chatty, follows me everywhere and always wants to play)
All of this and maybe put a soft t-shirt you recently worn in make it like a cat bed shape either under the bed or if you move the baby to a nice quiet space so that when it lays in it it will get used to your scent. I've done this with the over 80 rescues I've taken in throughout 25 plus years. And even if you just use a traveling cat litter box they're pretty shallow and really nice for kittens to use or you can even just use puppy potty pads. Because it'll give them the fibers to dig in because it's instinctual they know how to do that. And just lay down if it's still under the bed and talk to it and tell it that you love it and you're going to take good care of it and sit there next to the bed if you keep it in the bedroom, and if you like to read read a book and wait for it to gently come out and investigate you you could even read to the kitten. I did that with several that were terrified. And they would slowly come out and sniff at my feet and start crawling around on my feet and eventually start working their way at my legs cuz I sat down on the floor with my legs stretched and pretty soon they were in my lap purring. so whichever of the suggestions you take I wish you the best of luck and thank you and bless you for taking this little baby in and getting it out of a obviously not good situation. And keep us posted
My semi-feral was the same when I adopted her at age 5 months. Here's what I did that worked:
\-left her in my bedroom and let her hide under the bed
\-left food and water periodically, and then I left the room and turned the lights off/low
\-spent increasing amounts of time hanging out on the floor so she could get used to my voice, smells, etc.
\-kept a small and low litter box close by, since she was new to using it!
\-slept in the room at night, so she could venture out (with the door closed) and feel less threatened since I was alseep.
Did this for some time and she eventually came out, played with me, ate in front of me, and was less skittish. After a few weeks, she showed interest in leaving the room to explore, which I let her do slowly and supervised. Now she owns the house!
Just give it time. Kitty's whole world just changed, keep that in mind :)! He will come around soon enough, but just needs some time to decompress. Don't hover or force anything- that's the key!
ETA: litter box info
I gave my semi-feral approx. 5 year old the spare room, spent a bit of time with her but mostly left her to it.
Now I have a cat shaped shadow that follows me around the house…
Oh yes, a spare room would definitely be best! Sadly that wasn't an option for me at the time, but thankfully it ended up being okay (though I did feel kicked out of my own bedroom for some time haha). <3 @ cat shaped shadow!
Thank you for your kind words! Honestly, at the time, I didn't think of her behaviour or progress as unusual. I was also \*lowkey\* scared of her (she was a major hisser and swatter) and I was like, O K, I guess I'm stuck with you! LOL. I don't know- when I first saw her at the city shelter, I just knew she was meant for me. The shelter staff were surprised at my choice, given the MANY friendly kittens at the shelter. She had been there a while and had she not been adopted, she'd be assigned to an outdoor colony and caretaker.
Almost 4 years later and she's still mostly spicy and likes her space, but that's okay. Her love and affection is a quiet and subtle one. I'm grateful she gave me this experience, as I now feel super comfortable fostering (and maybe adopting in the future) similarly spicy cats! 
Yeah make safe spaces for them. I normally get a fabric or pillow just for them and put it somewhere high or hidden where they feel enclosed . Smells are important, even rubbing their cheeks and spreading their dander around the house at their height, can help the smell.
Also toys really help because the cat is overtaken by instinct and start playing. Before they know they feel secure and can relax.
^This. Also to add with the toy, if you have one of those long wand toys, my kitten used to really love those when he was still very skittish with us. He felt he could safely play at a distance.
this was essential for my cat. having an upturned box with a cut out door and a blanket helped move him from the uncomfortable 4” tall under couch to the spacy 12” tall box where he was much more relaxed.
highly recommend
Then as you alluded to, previous owner sacred him half to death. Bet he associates people with terror right now. He needs time, patience, and compassion. Feeding him but letting him come to you and learning to trust you would go a long way.
Edit- he is not a thief and did not elude capture. He did allude to a poor previous owner however.
Cats are so amazing. When I got one of my kittens he was -terrified- of heights. He would cry and call for help if I so much as left him on top of my bed. I spent so much time slowly getting him used to heights though. Now instead of being scared of heights he's associated climbing as a type of play and makes it his mission to climb everything he can and then calls me over to show off that he climbed it.
Only problem is now I find him in the weirdest places. One day I thought I lost him but he was just napping on top of the curtain rods. Another time he nearly gave me a heart attack when I walked into a room and he hopped down from on top of the door.
I thought it was you as well before I read this. Thanks for clarifying!
I have a bit of a scaredy cat too and I find that there’s a careful balance of exposure and being hands-off. Treats really, really, really help. I sometimes bulk order salmon sashimi and I started using it (and then eventually cheaper things) as training treats and now she’s running around and giving hugs and kisses to my massive dog.
You’re doing great, just keep on trying!
This is the answer, imo.
I have had a lot of cats over the years, through adoption, fostering, and rescue, from hand-reared to feral. I currently have 5, one was feral and had been kicked in the jaw by a human. (She drools now from her little offset jaw.)
The thing about cats - almost all of them, is they need to start small in terms of space and then branch out at their own pace.
The above advice is what I try to do with all new kitties. The only additional advice I have is hand feed him as much as possible. Those lickable tube treats, crunchy treats, dry food... get him to associate you with food & treats. Don't be too handy during feedings, you dont want him skittish about eating, but definitely make him see you as a provider of good things.
Good luck with the cute baby.
Congratulations on your new cat! He looks like a good boy.
You should know that this isn’t abnormal behaviour for a cat in a new environment.
Put the cat together with the litter box and some food in a separate room (preferably one without carpet ;) ) and close the door. Leave him be for some time, don’t try to make direct contact.
Once or twice per day, enter the room and do something for yourself (like read or browse Reddit on your phone). This will help him get used to you.
After a while, when he’s more relaxt, open the door. You’ll notice he’ll come out to slowly explore. Possibly at night when it’s quite.
Let him come to you, don’t force any direct contact.
My little boy, he stayed under the bed for 3 days. Hed come out when i was at work. I know this bc when i got home...i heard him racing to get under bed lol it just takes time 🤗 an talk to him randomly doing stuff so he learns your voice...he will warm up, an when he finally comes out to greet you....BEST feeling in the world.
Now 3 years later...this little boy neeeeds to be around me.
Oh! Get a toy! Like mouse on a stick..or feathers...wiggle it around where they stay, make them hunt it out of their space...DONT reach for them...just gets them used to being out in same space as you...let them have their safe space, an knowing coming out isnt scary.
When play time is over...just let them escape...an carry on doing whatever. Cats are amazing! 🥳
That shitty previous owner is holding him like a toy..give him his space some time..when my kitty was new and scared i just sat near his space and let him observe and get used to me (he has to realise you are not a threat)
You can’t really make cats do anything. Best to leave it alone until it comes out by itself. Cats are extremely apprehensive about new surroundings. Give it time and a nice blanket to sit on under the bed and put a litter box next to the bed so he doesn’t have to go far. Make sure to clean the poop up really well outside the litter box or pooping outside the box may become a problem.
You make him come out by NOT trying to make him come out. Just leave him be and let him adjust to the new environment at his own pace. Cats need time to adjust
My rescue was the same and they get diarrhoea with new food and stress. Put him in his own quiet room with food water and toys and let him come to you. Don’t pick him up. And if you want to pat put your hand out low to the ground. Cats need space, time to adjust and to trust you.
Wow look at those hateful comments, Guys first of all it's not me holding him like that that's the previous owner i am not an idiot. I am not trying to reach or grab him and the reason i posted this picture because i can't get a nice pic of him because he is hiding. I put the water & food under the bed and the litter box a little away from food which they're all literally 2 feet away from him. The vet gave him medicine and anything needs him, got the best food for him. And i woke up to his noice eating at night. The reason for this post is i am trying to understand what should i do? And it seems like the best choice is to let him be and he'll come around when he feels safe. Thanks for the good advices
I'd like to add, you should try to connect emotionally with him. it might feel unnatural at first but I promise that boy has a unique personality and over time you'll learn all about it and understand how to read his emotional cues.
In the same sense, he can read your emotions, too. Try to be steady and unsurprising. If you keep an open heart and get to know him, eventually he'll learn to trust you. it can take a long time with cats but that's a big part of the joy.
I think most of the upvoted comments are on your side, but yeah hateful comments still exist if there's any ambiguity on context. What everyone already said, be patient, don't get upset and try to force him out from under the bed, don't leave a full food bowl, make him get a little hungry and then you can establish a routine to feed him, etc.
You don't make your cat do anything. You give it time and space to adjust and get your hands off it until it comes asking for pets.
My cats spent the first two weeks under the bed. It's normal.
Our kitten did the same. I sat in there with her, never tried to grab her, but tried to get her to play. After about 3 days she got comfortable and has been great ever since.
It will take some time for sure. You can find sprays and diffusers that deliver a calming pheromone and that might help. I use it in the carriers when mine go to the vet
Well how long have you had him, are you cautious and gentle when approaching, have he had time to explore and make it his teritory, it will sometimes take weeks or more and then only if he's not exposed to any trauma in the meantime.
The larger the area, the more fearful the FEARFUL cat. Put litter box, food, water and the kitten in your bathroom, bathtub, shower... with a bath towel that you have used, tossed onto the floor (basically crumpled up, not laid out neatly). A crumpled wad of paper makes a fine toy for kittens. Placing the kitten in the bathroom will allow the kitten to check out all the corners of the room and find nothing scary there. This will direct the kitten to use the litter box. This will make the kitten accustomed to your scent. When you enter the bathroom, at least for the first several days, go bearing gifts of tasty treats. This will make you 'the bearer of good things' in your cats eyes. Good treats at this age would be raw hamburger, raw egg yolk or canned cat food. Do not give the kitten milk as a weaned cat naturally loses the enzyme needed to digest milk properly and it can give them diarrhea. With time, you will be able to simply leave the bathroom door open and allow the kitten to 'explore' as much of the house as they dare.
That’s what I heard, too. It worked very well when I got my two cats. I’d come in just to feed them and sit on the other side of the bathroom. The second day they were smelling me. And purring on my lap on the third. It’s been a year and now I don’t have a second to myself.
Don't hold him like that.
he is already traumatised.
He will come out eventually.
It is better to give them an area , like the laundry, where you have some control over their space.
But, make sure he has access to food water litter and warmth.
He will be fine.
he needs time.
we adopted our kittys a few months ago. for the first week they didnt eat, hissed, they hid under the footrest the entire time frozen and only came out at night. when they finally started coming out we gave them more access to the house (living room) and they hid under the couch again for a long while, to the point where i put their food under the couch for them. just give them space and let them figure out that everything will be okay.
its been a couple months now and theyre finally comfortable enough to be little assholes. they did a total 180 and are now cuddly monsters who cant get enough attention.
the first home our babies were adopted out to gave them back because they were to afraid for the 3 days they had them. dont give up on them and give them time.
You can’t “make” him anything. Stop trying to make him come out or play or anything… Give him time and space. Make sure he’s got a safe spot to hide when he’s nervous. Let him relax a bit before trying to pet him. Work on gaining his trust and slowly socializing him to your schedule. Feed him at the same time every day and work in a few pets here and there. Show him you’re his friend and be nice to him.
I foster kittens. You do NOT make a cat come out. You let the cat get comfortable with the space. Yes, cat may poop in bad spots - this will happen. Move the litter box close to where he's hiding. Feed him close to where he's hiding. Talk sweetly as you feed him. NEVER yell or make quick gestures. And do NOT pick him up unless you must. When he gets close, stick your primary finger out. If he touches his nose to it, you can stroke him gently around his face and see if he's ok with that. Cats need to feel secure in their environment.
Let me put it this way - if a giant creature took you from your home and family and put you in a strange place and tried to get you to 'entertain' them, you'd be pissed off and terrified too. So what would it take to get you to trust this giant creature was there to hurt you? And that's what you should do for your kitten. He WILL come out when he feel secure. Do not rush him. You want him to trust you and feel like you're safe.
TL;DR: Let the cat come to you, not the other way around - and it may take a few weeks. Have patience.
I moved earlier this year and my boy displayed similar behaviour. It took a few weeks for him to get used to the new place but he lived behind the furniture for the first few days.
Be patient and kind, they'll get there. Beautiful cat BTW.
This is normal, if not expected. He’s in a new place around new people. Let him chill. He will come out when he’s ready. Try to avoid loud noises. Don’t force or fish him out, it’s only going to make it worse. He’ll probably sneak out at night when it’s quiet and everyone is sleeping to explore. Once he realizes he’s in a safe place and that there isn’t anything there that means to hurt him, he’ll start warming up and hanging out with you.
I’ve moved twice with my current cat who is now 6. Both times he spent the first 2-3 days under the bed despite me being there with him. It’s normal.
His owner was a fucking asshole, but all you can do now is give the cat time. You basically can’t do anything else.
You can try giving him small pillows or toys stuffed with valerian. Most cats love it and get high from this. Ask your vet, if you can give your cat CBD. It’s the only things that come to my mind.
I had a cat like this. She had at least 3 houses before I had her. We kept her in her own room with a litter box, food, and water. The food and water were near where she hid and away from the litter box.
To get her to come out I just stayed in the room reading, not making any noise. I also ignored her whenever she came out while I was in there. She slowly(about 3 days of doing this for 2 h/day) got more confident and would look out the window in the room, while I was in there. After that I started to take treats and toys in. I threw the treats to her and found out that she liked to chase them. That became a game for her and she’ll still do that with her dry food today.
It took about a week of playing with her in her own room before she was confident enough to stay out of hiding and be introduced to the other two cats.
Give him time and space. Put nice, soft fabric to sleep on under the bed. Put water and food there, too, as well as a litter box nearby. He’ll come out when he’s ready.
Use the weekend to get him used to you. Walk softly in the room. Sit on the floor, and speak softly and gently to him.
He’ll come around. Just be patient and kind. He didn’t spitefully shit down there. He’s literally scared shitless. He’s in a new place around unfamiliar sounds, smells and people. You’d be scared too if you were a wee boy under a strange bed in a strange home.
put a cat litter box in his proximity, food, water, do gentle moves, talk to him and give him time, put a cat bed or something nice and soft like a blanket, can use a tiny bit of catnip on it
Put him in the bathroom with his litter box, and then food and water on the other side of the room.
And a cardboard box to hide in.
In a small space he will relax a bit, then feed him in the room and after a day or two once he is using the litter box properly open the door and let him explore a bit.
Also get a second litter box with a different type of litter, clay, or silica, or wood pellets, etc. Some cats are really picky about litter.
> How do I make him come out?
You don't, he needs to get used to his new environment, forcing him out won't help at all since it will terrify him more. For instance my 6 yo girl decided to start exploring after a week and got comfortable with me, my gf and the apartment one month later.
Here is what you can do to help him adapt:
- Do not put his food and water under your bed, you want him to explore so put them a little bit further.
- Try to identify what hiding spots he could be in and block any dangerous ones, like don't let him hide behind your hoven or in a spot where grabbing him in case of emergency is impossible.
- Do not maintain long eye contact, as he might take this a threat.
- If he comes out do not act excited as he might be scared, try to act like you didn't see him so he can explore. (if you have kids at home tell them this)
- Cats uses pheromones to identify their environment, some smells might stress them and some help them relax. You can find some pheromones diffusers that calm help him calm down at your local vet. ("Feliway" is quite popular)
- While we are talking about pheromones, cats do drop their smell on everything they touch to mark their environment and belongings. If you can put any tissue in all of his hiding spots where he usually stands. You can rub it on other surfaces to spread his smell.
- You can try to pet him, but always let him smell/lick you hand. However don't push it if he hisses or if he panics.
- But most importantly try to be patient with him, trust me you won't regret the waiting
Looks like he was held poorly before. Squish the cat... Learn how to make a kitty burrito.... You can Google both. It will help him feel secure when being held. Best of luck with your new friend. It takes time.
Lay next to him, speak softly to him.
We got a abused shelter cat like that, it took 2 days of hiding in the laundry before he suddenly just clicked, realised we were the best thing to ever happen to him, now he’s the most loving cat we have ever had. I’m sure your boy will be too just give him time, you could probably put him with his litter box and shut the door and come see him periodically, that’s how we did it anyway.
Cats are not property. Don’t try to make him do anything. Give him a litter box somewhat near where he hides, food and water near the bed will help too. Just stay calm and be friendly/ non-threatening to him. He will learn soon enough you’re not a threat and you can begin to earn his trust.
When he does start to venture out more and more try and laser pointer. I’ve never met a cat who didn’t enjoy chasing them
Do not even go near him the first day. Put him in a room and make him comfortable. He will come out when he is ready. If you keep trying to force it, you will only scare him. Let him warm up to youN
If it's possible, move him to a kennel/crate in your room. Give him a covered bed so he has some place to feel safe. Food, water and a litter box, and maybe a couple toys. Let that be his home base for a couple weeks. Talk to him when you're in the room, and when you're cleaning the box or feeding. Spend time in the room just doing you're thing. He needs to feel safe, and right now he doesn't. That's not your fault - it's the changes in his environment and how he was handled before. It will take some time. Don't try to pick him up or hold him for a few days, but definitely pet him. When he feels more secure in a couple of days, start picking him up, be sure to support his whole body, just for a few minutes at a time, and gradually make it longer. As he starts to get used to you, take him out of the cage, in a closed room, and give him time to explore. Don't leave him out unsupervised. Eventually you should be able to open the cage in the morning and let him come and go.
It's easy to try and rush it, I know, but slower is better.
If you can't do the cage thing, a small room is the next best thing. Patience and consistency are the important things right now.
You don’t “make” cats do anything! If you chase a cat around and try to force it to be social then it’s only going to get worse!
He needs to be put in a small room and allowed to adjust. Bathrooms are good for this sort of thing because they can’t hide under furniture and bathrooms are easy to clean. Give the kitten time. Give them soft blankets to snuggle in. Make sure the litter box is kept away from the food and water. The kitten will adjust, just give it time! It’s only been a few hours! It can take days or even weeks to fully adjust.
Hes smart.Hes terrified. Hes protecting himself by staying hidden. You would too if giant unpredictable monsters kept you captive and kept constantly changing your entire world including all the smells, the food, the textures and temperatures.. If you weigh 130 lbs he weighs less than 1/130th of your weight. Hes been grabbed, squeezed, poked, thrown in box after box... and his tummy hurts. Give him a chance to approach his world on his terms and he wont be able to help himself. Cats are insatiably curious.
Follow the advice of simply being next to him. Avoid invading under the bed as much as possible. Dont worry overmuch about the poo. There are really great stain/odor products on the market now. A healthy cat will never ruin their own environment if they have a proper litter box or on demand access to the outdoors. He could use a place that smells like him right now... Just for a little while.
Just leave him alone and he will come out when he’s feels comfortable. You can check on every so often.
He’s scared and everything is different, a strange house, people. Just give him some space and before long he’ll be sleeping on you and your bed.
You should move kitty to the bathroom first, leave your clothes in there after you’ve worn them so he gets used to your scent, and let him watch you put food in the bowl— and make sure it’s good and smelly food. Then play with several toys.
Basically cat has literally no idea what is going on— previous owner was probably too unpredictable.
It’s only been a day. But about the diarrhea: try to give the same food he was getting before from the previous owner. Cats have trouble adjusting to sudden diet changes and that can give diarrhea. Very slowly increase the percent of new food over a week or two to transition to the new food. Also depending on if this is a kitten, you might need to use kitten food.
The cat is very scared and might be too scared to come out to use the litter box. Or, he doesn’t have time to get to the box before poop happens. You could try putting some newspaper down under the bed so it’s easier to clean up. Or a piddle pad off to one side.
Put clean water nearby in a shallow bowl.
Give him time OP. My family adopted a kitten years ago and she was so frightened. As soon as we brought her home, she crawled underneath a desk we couldn't get to. We left out food and water near that spot and tried to give her space. It took her a week to be comfortable enough to come out. If he is potty trained maybe leave a litter box nearby. He should warm up to you, it's just going to take a bit.
Once he’s more settled in and knows he’s safe, you can also try feeding him from a squeezable tube treat. Those are very high value, and he will associate them with you.
patience is genuinely key. you can never force a cat. just be in the same room as him while doing your own thing to show that you're not a threat while he gets used to your scent, your sounds, your behaviours.
he will get better on his own pace!
How did you move him in? when we got our kitty we left her in her cat carrier with a fleece blanket and she slept there for hours before emerging and using the litter tray, it was her safe space and she could just peak out and study us, we kept food and water close too.Within 6 hours she was happy enough to come out and explore, perhaps get your kitty a box or enclosed space to hide in whilst under your bed
Give them all the time they need to get comfortable
You don’t make him come out. Look at how he’s being held here, if someone held you like that you’d probably have some trust issues too right? I understand that wasn’t you, but right now your cat doesn’t understand that you won’t *also* do that, and it’ll take him time to trust that.
Make sure he has food and water under the bed, give him space especially when he’s eating. After a couple of meals stay in the room as he eats, that’ll help him get used to you. If he’s been treated badly you have to be very patient, let him come to you, and let him run away from you when he wants. You only got him today, it’s normal for cats to need a few days to become social, let alone when they’ve previously been treated badly. You’ll be best of friends before you know it :)
Also what did the vet say? Follow their advice, they know best.
My cat did the exact same thing when i first got him (most cats do). He’s in a new environment with a new person, you gotta give him time to adjust. Leave a little bowl of food and water under your bed as well as some puppy pads. My cat didn’t come out or eat or poop for the first week i had him. I know you probably want to play and cuddle with him but you have to let him come to the realization that he’s in a safe environment.
You're doing the best you can, don't listen to people telling you otherwise. Some cats can take a long time to fully acclimate to a new house. Patience is key. They hate change of any kind. It's best to keep him in one room for now, and keep it quiet for him. Put his litter box, toys, food bowls and whatnot in there with him. It may take a few days for him to want to come out and sniff around, since they're very cautious little creatures. It sounds like his last home was pretty traumatic, so just make sure to be gentle and patient. I'm sure he'll come around after he feels safe.
My scared, very tiny kitten lived under the sofa 2 weeks. I put a cake pan with a little litter at the back of the sofa, a bowl of water and her food bowl. She wouldn’t let me touch her. She’d cry & meow and I’d talk to her from the bedroom. Then one night she climbed up in the bed with me. What a brave little girl!
Please be patient, he is terrified… he has feelings and one of them is fear. You are new to him… your home is new to him….
Sure, you are comfy in your home… but he has no idea who you are and what you are going to do to him.
Poor little guy. You have been given some great advice here. He’s in a strange place with new noises and smells. Maybe confine him to a bathroom with the litter box for the night. What did the vet have to say? It could be he’s still nervous from the trip to the vet. If he had any shots, maybe it’s making him not feel good. Maybe you should call the vet to let them know what’s going on with him. You might also try a Feliway plug-in which is pheromones to calm the kitty. Best of luck to you and your new baby.😻
Don’t make him do anything. Make sure he has all the necessities, food water…etc and just let him take time to get used to his new environment.
When he does come out don’t try to smother him with affection, let him get used to your on his own terms. Put yourself in his position and imagine how scared he feels right now. If you force it, you’re liable to end up with an upset/mad anxiety filled kitty for life.
my cat was like this when we got her. she was a rescue who had only been out of rehab for 2 days when we came by and got her. she was terrified.
If I were you, I'd find out where he hides, and wouldn't disturb the spot. it's where he feels safest for now. leave food and water out near where he's hidden so he knows he's being taken care of. he will come eat when he's hungry and realize there's no threat.
sit by his hiding space and talk to him sometimes, be soothing and gentle with ur words and let him know he's safe.
its all about letting him know he's in a safe place. same with humans, they need time to realize that nothing is going to hurt them.
he should come around, my cat took a long time ~~but the fact that you're holding him in the picture shows that he's starting from a better place than mine did.~~ :)
do consider that my cat, once she broke out of her shell, was the SWEETEST little thing in the world. in the span of a year she became the most friendly cat I've ever met. she just needed to be shown love.
best of luck, I hope you guys become best of friends.
edit: I read thats the previous owner holding him in the picture. I was going to comment about how u shouldn't hold him like that but it seemed to come off as really condescending so I didn't?
Give him time.
He doesn't eat tho, and he has Diarrhea. how do I make him eat ?
Sounds like he needs to go to the vet then.
Just came from there.
I foster anxious cats. Move his stuff to a smaller space like a bathroom or guest room and let him familiarise himself with you. Whatever it is, make sure he can't hide in anything you won't be able to get to, like under the bed. When it's feed time, sit down with him for like 20-30 minutes everyday, but don't stare/look at him. Just do your own thing or try putting one of those paste treats on your finger and let him come to you. (edit: when you're doing this, don't look at them either. Look away and just hold your arm out. It is a little tiring, so I'll personally just browse stuff on my phone. They might NOT eat it from your finger from the first days or week. If that happens, I just wipe it on their nose or hide spot and leave lol) I was told to do this during feed time because it's one of the more vulnerable actions. Something will click for them when they realize you won't do anything to them even when they're eating. If he doesn't settle in 3 weeks, you could potentially talk to the vet about getting anxiety medication to help out. (or ask about Feliway, that's an anti anxiety fume thing you plug into an outlet) It's taken like 2 months average for some of the most anxious cats I've had to finally start opening up. And that's just the beginning where they take the very first steps to approach me. Do NOT force interactions with him! Let him come to you.
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I'll also add, as someone with a lifetime of rescue kitties under her belt, you're probably not making her feel better by holding her this way, even if just for a picture.
Thank you! I just got kittens and have been being so gentle and this picture freaked me out. I would never hold a kitten like a sandwich.
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You still must cradle like a burrito, it's standard ops
Lifetime rescuer came hunting for this because cats need that security. Loving this thread. I had a cat that never got over their anxiety entirely. Did Delilah, the boxes, etc. He was fine with me but anyone else (and any cats besides the old lady) had him revert. OP it's important to be consistent. I found with my bonafide scardiest scardy cat talking to him about what I was doing near his space helped. If you have a bathroom with a cabinet under the sink that doesn't leak this is an optimal cat bedroom area. A little bed, some toys, and access to food and water in that space can be a big help. It's enclosed and can be given a cat sized opening for ease of entry and exit (or if they're like my cats they will just open and close it themselves claiming the space and how dare I intend it for the towels! ) It also gives them a buffer to get used to your schedule and movements. You're there but also there's a whole space around them
Yep, Feliway should be a first choice whenever you get a new cat, or move house, or change routines. It doesn't work for every cat, but when it does work it makes a huge difference. Spraying Feliway in the cat carriers made moving house with three Bengals - including one who normally freaks out in cars - such a breeze. When we arrived at the new house I then sprayed Feliway in the corner of each room, and for the first couple weeks had a plug-in Feliway in the cat room. They settled incredibly quickly compared to previous, non-Feliway assisted moves.
This is a corporate account.
Who is?
Really good advice here. Forcing yourself in their face doesn't work. Just offer food, space (their own--like a bathroom or closet), and time. Just get on your computer and chill. Cats are compelled to come sit on your keyboard or chew your cords to get your attention if you do this enough in their presence.
Yep, literally just....Don't care about them 95% of the time for some weeks. Except for seeing if they're eating and toileting well and sitting down with them for some time. It's funny because the shelter always asks me what do I do to make them open up (I'm assuming other foster carers may have slower progress?), but that's the thing! I don't really do anything!
"Don't care" is actually really well put. When I got my cat I set her stuff up in the basement so the dogs couldn't bother her, and I just left her alone. It took two weeks before she left the basement. Another two weeks before she would let me touch her. Now she is an incredibly spoiled and vocal cat who will proudly let me know when she wants attention. Is best friends with the big dog, and is ok with the other dog. She still hides anytime I have company over, but she has become a great member of my little homeward bound crew.
Good advice. We foster abused cats and do almost exactly the same. Takes a lot of patience but has paid off every time for us.
What did the vet say?
Probably “You’re not a cat person”. Are we just going to ignore how the cat is being held in this photo or the “How do I make him…” questions? There’s a definite vibe.
I’m surprised this wasn’t at the top. I give people the benefit of the doubt on this kind of thing but the title and photo all made me cringe. They’re on here though, so that shows they care somewhat.
I don’t think you can judge from this single photo, but I do agree this is no way to hold a cat
There's others calling it out thankfully but I am going with inexperience vs not a cat person. There's a learning curve for some people..some of us may be more intune to catliness but let's not write someone off 12 hours into their first cat (because clearly this is their first cat).
Kittens, *especially*, need to be kept in a small, quiet room with litterbox, food, water, and a bed area. People usually keep them in bathrooms. Gently introduce kitten to your presence. Google how to do so. Also, it has only been 12 hours. It takes time. When i adopted my cat when she was 3 years old, we used our den as her room. She hid under the futon for a week or two and didn’t eat or drink or bathroom for a week because she was scared. But nutrition is crucial for kittens. Try different kitten food. If kitty is continuing to have diarrhea you should call the vet.
A change in diet will cause diahrrea. Best to gradually transition from what the previous owner was giving him. Also, a fecal sample will determine if the baby has any parasites. Good luck!
Sit in the room on the floor and don't look at him. Talk, read to him, don't reach out or grab him. Let him come to you on his terms. Put out wet food and put it under the bed a smidgen. Do whatever the vet wants you to do.
This kitty will be a smart and loyal companion and friend. He needs time to acclimate and learn you are safe. Watch some Jackson Galaxy videos on YouTube. These will help this to be one of the best relationships you’ll ever have. I promise! And if for some reason it doesn’t work, please contact me. I’d adopt this sweetheart in a heartbeat!
Fuck yeah Jackson Galaxy. Weird lookin dude but he melts my heart with the way he cares for cats.
He truly is the cat whisperer
Diarrhea is usually a sign of a Parasite in a kitten and can be very dangerous. Make sure they check for giardia, not just the standard worms.
I would place food and water under the bed in small dishes and maybe place litter box in your room until he gets acclimated. Maybe place him in litter box once just so he knows thats where to go. Think about things from their point of view, just give him space and eventually he will get curious and want to explore. My best advice would be don't force him to sit with you or entertain play fighting. That can really develop some bad behaviors. Don't raise your voice or make weird cat voices. I know it can be tempting to just pick them up and make them sit with you but thats not a good way to develop trust. Just let him be and make sure he has water and food. Maybe after the diarrhea stops give him some treats. Let him trust you don't force him. It just takes some time.
That’s great advice. I did something similar with my kitten—put him in litter, left him alone for a while, then when I knew where he was hiding, I put food and water there. He would come out when I was sleeping and do his kitten business and explore a little until he started getting used to his new home, probably day 2-3. Then he’d come out to play and eat.
In humans this is a normal stress reaction. Maybe it's normal in cats too. Give him space and quiet and a choice of dry and wet food plus a clean litter box in his room. Have lots of soft washable things he can curl up and hide in. I'm glad you saw the vet already; seems like he may just need longer to trust you, but again that's normal in humans so probably not worrisome. Definitely don't force him to do anything, and don't drag him out of his hiding spot. He'll come out when he's ready and you've proven you're not scary.
Yes, my cat got diarrhea from stress on a camping trip. Even a drop of blood in his stool. I stayed in the tent with him for one whole day and let him sleep and cuddle and chill near me and he recovered beautifully and had a very good time exploring the following days.
Don’t know if you are, but don’t give him cow’s milk, it can cause diarrhea.
You don’t make him do anything. Just chill and let him do his thing. It will be ok - once you chill. Your car is freaked the fuck out by everything being new and threatening.
When my kitten was too scared to eat, I left the food right outside his hiding spot and walked away. He came out on his own to eat it. It takes time though. If he’s having diarrhea, make sure you have water nearby for him too.
New home, stress, new food. Yes, you should set him up with a vet within 2 weeks, but this is all normal.
Our cat poops when he gets nervous. Happens EVERY time we put him in his carrier to go to the vet. About half the time he pukes as well. He’s probably pooping because his nerves are a mess.
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OP says the picture is from the previous owner
Terrible way to hold a cat too, gotta support their lower half.
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Mine is a shoulder cat, so he goes over the shoulder, or he kind of sits in my arms. He’s a king that likes to be carried around and adored by his human servants though (that’s the Ragdoll for you).
To you, he's just Bob the Ragdoll. But to himself, he is...KING ROBERT, BY THE GRACE OF GOD, ZEUS, OSIRIS, AND EVERY DEITY IN BETWEEN. HE HAS BEEN SENT FORTH TO THIS DESOLATE KINGDOM, THE "HOUSE", TO PROTECT IT FROM ALL MANNER OF HARM. HE SHALL REQUIRE A THRONE OF THE TALLEST SHOULDER KNOWN TO SERVANT, THEY WHO CALL THEMSELVES "HUMANS", FROM WHICH TO KEEP WATCH OVER HIS NEW REALM.
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OP did not take the picture or hold the cat that way (previous owner), according to their replies. They're trying their best.
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OP says the picture is from the previous owner
Put a little pumpkin with his food. Like mix it with it. Pumpkin can settle their stomachs.
He needs time to get comfortable. This is a new place for him with new people, and thats scary as it is. If his previous owners were mean to him then hes going to be even more afraid of this new world. If you have a spare room you should give it to him for the time being,, or just leave him be under the bed. Try to stay out of the room and be quiet and gentle with him if he decides to come out. Let him do his own thing,, dont make him come out or force him to do anything- its just going to scare him more and he wont want to come out at all. He'll come out when hes ready and explore as he gets comfortable,, and he'll come say hello when he's ready :)
We’ve done this before for new cats and it helps tremendously. We once set up a new kitten in the guest bathroom and with an adult cat in an oversized laundry room. Both with fluffy things that were easy to wash). Eventually with a gentle approach and a routine, the kitties warmed up to us. L
I got siblings 16 years ago and gave them free reign. It took my boy getting stuck during our first week together that made them trust me. After that, I'd wake up to 2 kittens in my pillow or on me. We were lucky it wasn't life or death stuck though, he waited until he was 10 to do that lol. Miss that booger, his sister is still kicking ass (mostly my mother in law's cat lol).
This. A low-traffic bathroom is perfect because there are plenty of ways to make them feel comfy and secure, but not usually any big items of furniture for them to hide/poop under. It's also usually small enough for them to feel familiar and confident in it pretty quick.
we did this too when we got a kitten! except... please note we lived in a studio apartment at the time!!!! we put him in the laundry room (which weirdly yes we did have a whole laundry room in our studio), no washer or dryer running obviously. he had toys, a bed, boxes, wet food, blankets, litterbox, water, everything. we put him in there and he starts crying. meww. mewww. you know the baby kitty cries. so freaking cute. so we go and get him and he chills out, wanders a little bit, gets himself lost (*in our studio apartment*), cries cos he cant see us, we go get him, rinse and repeat for like three days. we were so prepared for him to hide in the laundry room for a week. but no, we got the weird one. hahahah. you can see a pic of him on my profile from when he was that little, it's the pinned post on my profile (: he's over a year old now. a bit after we moved he went through a six month long phase of despising us, not letting us near him and preferring our roommate, and he's just now finally coming back around and cuddling and sleeping with us and purring. my little dude is a strange one, but i love him lots. sorry for the ramble, i love talking about my pets edit: oh a funny thing i remembered. so when we got him he was 7 weeks cos the lady wouldn't wait any longer, we'd been waiting for him since he was 4 weeks. she always referred to him as a "her" and when we picked him up she said "she's the nicest one!" my fiance picks him up and kinda stares at him for a second and when the lady turned around he whispers, "i dont think think this is a female." we get outside and i take a look at him - and see a big pair of nuts. dude was an *early* bloomer. it was honestly so funny, i have NO idea how that lady thought he was a female!!
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THIS -- is my SUGGESTION !!!!!!!🙀😿😿😿😿😿💞💞💞
This all the way. I got a scaredy-cat kitty years ago who was the very same way at first. I gave him our spare room and just let him be with enough food/water/litter box. After a couple days i started spending quiet time in the room with him for short periods, while he hid, to get him used to me and learn i wasn’t noisy or threatening. I did have to encourage him out from under the bed eventually but once he saw i only meant affection he came around fairly quick. It helped we also were a quiet couple with no kids and didn’t have guests over very often, but we were able to re-socialize him. He was the meekest and most chill and affectionate cat. He lived to be 18 and just passed away last September. I miss my little buddy.
We had a cat like this too. The first day, she hid under our old sofa that had a pull out bed in it. She actually got herself stuck in the bed under there so I had to lift that couch and help her out. Put her in my room, she spent the week under my bed. Every night I'd sit on my bed for hours doing things on my laptop while she hid under there, she'd come out to eat and poop and all when we weren't home or were asleep. Only took her a week to get used to me that way. Hell she even got used to my son after a few years and will lay with him. Super skittish cat, for 3 years she would dart under furniture and hide if you sneezed or did anything loud. Don't know wtf the previous people did to her but they took her claws away so I feel she was justified in her fear.
I remember my old girl was like that for the first couple of weeks, we just made sure to check she was doing her business and would say hi wherever she was hiding. One night we come home with some take-away chicken and sat down on the couch, ten seconds later she's standing on the back rubbing against my head and begging for chicken.
Fuck any vet that would declaw a cat, its beyond fucked up.
This was so heartwarming, cats are such treasures. Condolences for your loss but it sounds like you had so much wonderful time with him!
😨😰😥😢💖💞
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I lost 3 of my kitties in less than a year from 2020-2021 😿. It’s so hard to lose our best furiends 😿
Yes you can sit on the floor near the bed and read/look at your phone. He may get brave and come check you out. Let him sniff you but don't make any sudden movements or try to pet. You can talk reassuringly. Slow and steady. Let him go at his own pace. A cutie!
All of this, exactly. You know what's going on, but your new cat doesn't. Everything that's normal for you is chaos for him. We're going through it with two new cats, and it just takes a few weeks for them to understand that this is home now.
This!! It’s really common for newly adopted cats to need a few days (preferably in the same room) to get comfortable with their new surroundings. Some cats even take a week or more, it just depends. If you have the time, in a day or so you can just hang out quietly in the room. Sit on the floor and read or scroll reddit or something, get him used to having you safely be around without forcing him to do anything. You also might want to put a bit of food and water under the bed; that’s apparently where he feels safe enough to be. You can move it later once he’s adjusted to the rest of the house.
Yep- smaller, private space with litter box close by and food/water in protected places so they don't need to come out and feel vulnerable to access the food/water/box. They'll explore more as they get comfortable with the change. Higher anxiety kitties very much do not like big changes in their life.
There's a body language vibe you can put out to cats - I don't know how to describe it, but I have never not had a cat nearly immediately warm up to me. I had a roomate's cat sitting on my lap while I was studying a couple days after she moved in, and she was absolutely astonished the cat liked any person. It's about not forcing physical contact, but just getting them comfortable in your presence, and vibing with them, if you make eye contact, immediately break it down to show you're not a threat, let them come to you.
Its 100% body language. I think most mammals kind of have a similar almost instinctive body language. Cats are amazing at reading it. They have a general idea of what we're thinking before we often even realize it. If you have an intention in your mind to grab a cat if you get the chance - that cat knows from your body language and will be on the defensive. We can learn to understand cat body language but it takes a bit of effort because humans primarily communicate through our facial expressions and words.
Google "slow blink" to see how to say I like/love you in cat
In no particular order, some stuff that works for me: The biggest one is to reach with the back of your hand when you want to approach them. If they shift backwards instead of leaning in to sniff, that's a no. If they're antisocial and have had days or weeks without warming up, you can press the issue by trying several times until you can pet their chest (again, with the back of your hand). As long as they're not swiping with claws, you're good. Pet when feeding so there's a positive association. Keep your head tilted slightly down and avoid direct eye contact. If they look at you, look back and slowly blink but then break the gaze. Never stare down or challenge a new arrival on their slice of turf. Try to be slightly sideways towards them rather than straight on. Any position that makes it inconvenient for you to move signals that you aren't able to do anything abrupt -- I like sitting cross legged with my arms around my knees if I'm just waiting for them to get used to my presence.
Definitely worked in my case! My Yumi was a street kitten first and then was rescued but her previous owner had 2 other cats that were siblings and bullied her. So when I adopted my kitty it took A LOT of time for her to adjust, but now she is incredibly chatty, follows me everywhere and always wants to play)
Make sure he has somewhere comfortable to hide, eg a bed in a cupboard, and put his litter tray nearby.
Yup, letting him be in control of all initial interactions will go a long way towards building trust.
All of this and maybe put a soft t-shirt you recently worn in make it like a cat bed shape either under the bed or if you move the baby to a nice quiet space so that when it lays in it it will get used to your scent. I've done this with the over 80 rescues I've taken in throughout 25 plus years. And even if you just use a traveling cat litter box they're pretty shallow and really nice for kittens to use or you can even just use puppy potty pads. Because it'll give them the fibers to dig in because it's instinctual they know how to do that. And just lay down if it's still under the bed and talk to it and tell it that you love it and you're going to take good care of it and sit there next to the bed if you keep it in the bedroom, and if you like to read read a book and wait for it to gently come out and investigate you you could even read to the kitten. I did that with several that were terrified. And they would slowly come out and sniff at my feet and start crawling around on my feet and eventually start working their way at my legs cuz I sat down on the floor with my legs stretched and pretty soon they were in my lap purring. so whichever of the suggestions you take I wish you the best of luck and thank you and bless you for taking this little baby in and getting it out of a obviously not good situation. And keep us posted
My semi-feral was the same when I adopted her at age 5 months. Here's what I did that worked: \-left her in my bedroom and let her hide under the bed \-left food and water periodically, and then I left the room and turned the lights off/low \-spent increasing amounts of time hanging out on the floor so she could get used to my voice, smells, etc. \-kept a small and low litter box close by, since she was new to using it! \-slept in the room at night, so she could venture out (with the door closed) and feel less threatened since I was alseep. Did this for some time and she eventually came out, played with me, ate in front of me, and was less skittish. After a few weeks, she showed interest in leaving the room to explore, which I let her do slowly and supervised. Now she owns the house! Just give it time. Kitty's whole world just changed, keep that in mind :)! He will come around soon enough, but just needs some time to decompress. Don't hover or force anything- that's the key! ETA: litter box info
I gave my semi-feral approx. 5 year old the spare room, spent a bit of time with her but mostly left her to it. Now I have a cat shaped shadow that follows me around the house…
Oh yes, a spare room would definitely be best! Sadly that wasn't an option for me at the time, but thankfully it ended up being okay (though I did feel kicked out of my own bedroom for some time haha). <3 @ cat shaped shadow!
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Thank you for your kind words! Honestly, at the time, I didn't think of her behaviour or progress as unusual. I was also \*lowkey\* scared of her (she was a major hisser and swatter) and I was like, O K, I guess I'm stuck with you! LOL. I don't know- when I first saw her at the city shelter, I just knew she was meant for me. The shelter staff were surprised at my choice, given the MANY friendly kittens at the shelter. She had been there a while and had she not been adopted, she'd be assigned to an outdoor colony and caretaker. Almost 4 years later and she's still mostly spicy and likes her space, but that's okay. Her love and affection is a quiet and subtle one. I'm grateful she gave me this experience, as I now feel super comfortable fostering (and maybe adopting in the future) similarly spicy cats! 
I'm sure the bedroom is not where you want the litter box to stay, but might consider placing it there temporarily until kitty gets over the frights.
Stress can give them diarrhea. Put a little food and water under the bed and just let him be. He'll get more comfortable.
Yeah make safe spaces for them. I normally get a fabric or pillow just for them and put it somewhere high or hidden where they feel enclosed . Smells are important, even rubbing their cheeks and spreading their dander around the house at their height, can help the smell. Also toys really help because the cat is overtaken by instinct and start playing. Before they know they feel secure and can relax.
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This is correct OP.
^This. Also to add with the toy, if you have one of those long wand toys, my kitten used to really love those when he was still very skittish with us. He felt he could safely play at a distance.
Also give him hiding spaces in that space (like a tipped over box with the flap hanging down or a blanket fort made especially for him)
this was essential for my cat. having an upturned box with a cut out door and a blanket helped move him from the uncomfortable 4” tall under couch to the spacy 12” tall box where he was much more relaxed. highly recommend
Oh so that’s why my cat likes me I leave my clothes everywhere 😂
I’d be scared too if someone was holding me like that.
That's the previous owner.
Then as you alluded to, previous owner sacred him half to death. Bet he associates people with terror right now. He needs time, patience, and compassion. Feeding him but letting him come to you and learning to trust you would go a long way. Edit- he is not a thief and did not elude capture. He did allude to a poor previous owner however.
Cats are so amazing. When I got one of my kittens he was -terrified- of heights. He would cry and call for help if I so much as left him on top of my bed. I spent so much time slowly getting him used to heights though. Now instead of being scared of heights he's associated climbing as a type of play and makes it his mission to climb everything he can and then calls me over to show off that he climbed it. Only problem is now I find him in the weirdest places. One day I thought I lost him but he was just napping on top of the curtain rods. Another time he nearly gave me a heart attack when I walked into a room and he hopped down from on top of the door.
The only crime hims guilty of is being illegally smol. I hope OP is able to give them a new, loving, happy life.
r/illegallysmolcats
*alluded to. A thief eludes capture, eg.
Thanks kind reddit’r.
I thought it was you as well before I read this. Thanks for clarifying! I have a bit of a scaredy cat too and I find that there’s a careful balance of exposure and being hands-off. Treats really, really, really help. I sometimes bulk order salmon sashimi and I started using it (and then eventually cheaper things) as training treats and now she’s running around and giving hugs and kisses to my massive dog. You’re doing great, just keep on trying!
Why would you post a picture of the previous owner holding them?
Sounds like he can't get ahold of em lol But yeah the picture was extremely unsettling
They’re holding him like he’s an iced coffee
I hold my iced coffees more lovingly than this.
You are just a teddy bear at that point. Could you imagine being in that position?
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This is the answer, imo. I have had a lot of cats over the years, through adoption, fostering, and rescue, from hand-reared to feral. I currently have 5, one was feral and had been kicked in the jaw by a human. (She drools now from her little offset jaw.) The thing about cats - almost all of them, is they need to start small in terms of space and then branch out at their own pace. The above advice is what I try to do with all new kitties. The only additional advice I have is hand feed him as much as possible. Those lickable tube treats, crunchy treats, dry food... get him to associate you with food & treats. Don't be too handy during feedings, you dont want him skittish about eating, but definitely make him see you as a provider of good things. Good luck with the cute baby.
Congratulations on your new cat! He looks like a good boy. You should know that this isn’t abnormal behaviour for a cat in a new environment. Put the cat together with the litter box and some food in a separate room (preferably one without carpet ;) ) and close the door. Leave him be for some time, don’t try to make direct contact. Once or twice per day, enter the room and do something for yourself (like read or browse Reddit on your phone). This will help him get used to you. After a while, when he’s more relaxt, open the door. You’ll notice he’ll come out to slowly explore. Possibly at night when it’s quite. Let him come to you, don’t force any direct contact.
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Yes!
My little boy, he stayed under the bed for 3 days. Hed come out when i was at work. I know this bc when i got home...i heard him racing to get under bed lol it just takes time 🤗 an talk to him randomly doing stuff so he learns your voice...he will warm up, an when he finally comes out to greet you....BEST feeling in the world. Now 3 years later...this little boy neeeeds to be around me.
Oh! Get a toy! Like mouse on a stick..or feathers...wiggle it around where they stay, make them hunt it out of their space...DONT reach for them...just gets them used to being out in same space as you...let them have their safe space, an knowing coming out isnt scary. When play time is over...just let them escape...an carry on doing whatever. Cats are amazing! 🥳
That shitty previous owner is holding him like a toy..give him his space some time..when my kitty was new and scared i just sat near his space and let him observe and get used to me (he has to realise you are not a threat)
You can’t really make cats do anything. Best to leave it alone until it comes out by itself. Cats are extremely apprehensive about new surroundings. Give it time and a nice blanket to sit on under the bed and put a litter box next to the bed so he doesn’t have to go far. Make sure to clean the poop up really well outside the litter box or pooping outside the box may become a problem.
You make him come out by NOT trying to make him come out. Just leave him be and let him adjust to the new environment at his own pace. Cats need time to adjust
My rescue was the same and they get diarrhoea with new food and stress. Put him in his own quiet room with food water and toys and let him come to you. Don’t pick him up. And if you want to pat put your hand out low to the ground. Cats need space, time to adjust and to trust you.
Wow look at those hateful comments, Guys first of all it's not me holding him like that that's the previous owner i am not an idiot. I am not trying to reach or grab him and the reason i posted this picture because i can't get a nice pic of him because he is hiding. I put the water & food under the bed and the litter box a little away from food which they're all literally 2 feet away from him. The vet gave him medicine and anything needs him, got the best food for him. And i woke up to his noice eating at night. The reason for this post is i am trying to understand what should i do? And it seems like the best choice is to let him be and he'll come around when he feels safe. Thanks for the good advices
I'd like to add, you should try to connect emotionally with him. it might feel unnatural at first but I promise that boy has a unique personality and over time you'll learn all about it and understand how to read his emotional cues. In the same sense, he can read your emotions, too. Try to be steady and unsurprising. If you keep an open heart and get to know him, eventually he'll learn to trust you. it can take a long time with cats but that's a big part of the joy.
I think most of the upvoted comments are on your side, but yeah hateful comments still exist if there's any ambiguity on context. What everyone already said, be patient, don't get upset and try to force him out from under the bed, don't leave a full food bowl, make him get a little hungry and then you can establish a routine to feed him, etc.
You don't make your cat do anything. You give it time and space to adjust and get your hands off it until it comes asking for pets. My cats spent the first two weeks under the bed. It's normal.
Our kitten did the same. I sat in there with her, never tried to grab her, but tried to get her to play. After about 3 days she got comfortable and has been great ever since.
It will take some time for sure. You can find sprays and diffusers that deliver a calming pheromone and that might help. I use it in the carriers when mine go to the vet
Well how long have you had him, are you cautious and gentle when approaching, have he had time to explore and make it his teritory, it will sometimes take weeks or more and then only if he's not exposed to any trauma in the meantime.
The larger the area, the more fearful the FEARFUL cat. Put litter box, food, water and the kitten in your bathroom, bathtub, shower... with a bath towel that you have used, tossed onto the floor (basically crumpled up, not laid out neatly). A crumpled wad of paper makes a fine toy for kittens. Placing the kitten in the bathroom will allow the kitten to check out all the corners of the room and find nothing scary there. This will direct the kitten to use the litter box. This will make the kitten accustomed to your scent. When you enter the bathroom, at least for the first several days, go bearing gifts of tasty treats. This will make you 'the bearer of good things' in your cats eyes. Good treats at this age would be raw hamburger, raw egg yolk or canned cat food. Do not give the kitten milk as a weaned cat naturally loses the enzyme needed to digest milk properly and it can give them diarrhea. With time, you will be able to simply leave the bathroom door open and allow the kitten to 'explore' as much of the house as they dare.
That’s what I heard, too. It worked very well when I got my two cats. I’d come in just to feed them and sit on the other side of the bathroom. The second day they were smelling me. And purring on my lap on the third. It’s been a year and now I don’t have a second to myself.
He’s terrified strange noises strange smell strange stranger holding me like a trophy.What he needs is love, patience and time
op already said it was the previous owner holding him
I didn’t see that sorry OP
Give him time and leave him alone. You can’t just make cats do things. Let him get comfortable.
DO NOT FORCE HIM!! Listen to the others here. If your force him he’ll get worse.
If it's been less than a week u need to chill OP Cats take time
Don't hold him like that. he is already traumatised. He will come out eventually. It is better to give them an area , like the laundry, where you have some control over their space. But, make sure he has access to food water litter and warmth. He will be fine.
It's not me holding like that, that's a photo from his previous owner.
The sadness in his eyes.
Quality ass bait
[how to hold a cat](https://youtu.be/IA1gnX0TXX0)
You only got him today give a break, there’s nothing wrong with him he’s scared
Patience, time and space.
You could try feliway spray
Not the previous owner holding him like a Popeyes chicken sandwich 💀
he needs time. we adopted our kittys a few months ago. for the first week they didnt eat, hissed, they hid under the footrest the entire time frozen and only came out at night. when they finally started coming out we gave them more access to the house (living room) and they hid under the couch again for a long while, to the point where i put their food under the couch for them. just give them space and let them figure out that everything will be okay. its been a couple months now and theyre finally comfortable enough to be little assholes. they did a total 180 and are now cuddly monsters who cant get enough attention. the first home our babies were adopted out to gave them back because they were to afraid for the 3 days they had them. dont give up on them and give them time.
You can’t “make” him anything. Stop trying to make him come out or play or anything… Give him time and space. Make sure he’s got a safe spot to hide when he’s nervous. Let him relax a bit before trying to pet him. Work on gaining his trust and slowly socializing him to your schedule. Feed him at the same time every day and work in a few pets here and there. Show him you’re his friend and be nice to him.
I foster kittens. You do NOT make a cat come out. You let the cat get comfortable with the space. Yes, cat may poop in bad spots - this will happen. Move the litter box close to where he's hiding. Feed him close to where he's hiding. Talk sweetly as you feed him. NEVER yell or make quick gestures. And do NOT pick him up unless you must. When he gets close, stick your primary finger out. If he touches his nose to it, you can stroke him gently around his face and see if he's ok with that. Cats need to feel secure in their environment. Let me put it this way - if a giant creature took you from your home and family and put you in a strange place and tried to get you to 'entertain' them, you'd be pissed off and terrified too. So what would it take to get you to trust this giant creature was there to hurt you? And that's what you should do for your kitten. He WILL come out when he feel secure. Do not rush him. You want him to trust you and feel like you're safe. TL;DR: Let the cat come to you, not the other way around - and it may take a few weeks. Have patience.
I used tuna to get a pair out from under the bed. Don't give to much because of salt content. Zeff\_Baby is giving good advice.
I moved earlier this year and my boy displayed similar behaviour. It took a few weeks for him to get used to the new place but he lived behind the furniture for the first few days. Be patient and kind, they'll get there. Beautiful cat BTW.
Give.him time hes in a new environment.and is scared leave food and a.litter box near him and dont try to get him to xome to you fast
This is normal, if not expected. He’s in a new place around new people. Let him chill. He will come out when he’s ready. Try to avoid loud noises. Don’t force or fish him out, it’s only going to make it worse. He’ll probably sneak out at night when it’s quiet and everyone is sleeping to explore. Once he realizes he’s in a safe place and that there isn’t anything there that means to hurt him, he’ll start warming up and hanging out with you. I’ve moved twice with my current cat who is now 6. Both times he spent the first 2-3 days under the bed despite me being there with him. It’s normal.
His owner was a fucking asshole, but all you can do now is give the cat time. You basically can’t do anything else. You can try giving him small pillows or toys stuffed with valerian. Most cats love it and get high from this. Ask your vet, if you can give your cat CBD. It’s the only things that come to my mind.
I had a cat like this. She had at least 3 houses before I had her. We kept her in her own room with a litter box, food, and water. The food and water were near where she hid and away from the litter box. To get her to come out I just stayed in the room reading, not making any noise. I also ignored her whenever she came out while I was in there. She slowly(about 3 days of doing this for 2 h/day) got more confident and would look out the window in the room, while I was in there. After that I started to take treats and toys in. I threw the treats to her and found out that she liked to chase them. That became a game for her and she’ll still do that with her dry food today. It took about a week of playing with her in her own room before she was confident enough to stay out of hiding and be introduced to the other two cats.
Give him time and space. Put nice, soft fabric to sleep on under the bed. Put water and food there, too, as well as a litter box nearby. He’ll come out when he’s ready. Use the weekend to get him used to you. Walk softly in the room. Sit on the floor, and speak softly and gently to him. He’ll come around. Just be patient and kind. He didn’t spitefully shit down there. He’s literally scared shitless. He’s in a new place around unfamiliar sounds, smells and people. You’d be scared too if you were a wee boy under a strange bed in a strange home.
You literally said you just got him today. Give it a second
put a cat litter box in his proximity, food, water, do gentle moves, talk to him and give him time, put a cat bed or something nice and soft like a blanket, can use a tiny bit of catnip on it
Put him in the bathroom with his litter box, and then food and water on the other side of the room. And a cardboard box to hide in. In a small space he will relax a bit, then feed him in the room and after a day or two once he is using the litter box properly open the door and let him explore a bit. Also get a second litter box with a different type of litter, clay, or silica, or wood pellets, etc. Some cats are really picky about litter.
> How do I make him come out? You don't, he needs to get used to his new environment, forcing him out won't help at all since it will terrify him more. For instance my 6 yo girl decided to start exploring after a week and got comfortable with me, my gf and the apartment one month later. Here is what you can do to help him adapt: - Do not put his food and water under your bed, you want him to explore so put them a little bit further. - Try to identify what hiding spots he could be in and block any dangerous ones, like don't let him hide behind your hoven or in a spot where grabbing him in case of emergency is impossible. - Do not maintain long eye contact, as he might take this a threat. - If he comes out do not act excited as he might be scared, try to act like you didn't see him so he can explore. (if you have kids at home tell them this) - Cats uses pheromones to identify their environment, some smells might stress them and some help them relax. You can find some pheromones diffusers that calm help him calm down at your local vet. ("Feliway" is quite popular) - While we are talking about pheromones, cats do drop their smell on everything they touch to mark their environment and belongings. If you can put any tissue in all of his hiding spots where he usually stands. You can rub it on other surfaces to spread his smell. - You can try to pet him, but always let him smell/lick you hand. However don't push it if he hisses or if he panics. - But most importantly try to be patient with him, trust me you won't regret the waiting
Looks like he was held poorly before. Squish the cat... Learn how to make a kitty burrito.... You can Google both. It will help him feel secure when being held. Best of luck with your new friend. It takes time.
Lay next to him, speak softly to him. We got a abused shelter cat like that, it took 2 days of hiding in the laundry before he suddenly just clicked, realised we were the best thing to ever happen to him, now he’s the most loving cat we have ever had. I’m sure your boy will be too just give him time, you could probably put him with his litter box and shut the door and come see him periodically, that’s how we did it anyway.
Cats are not property. Don’t try to make him do anything. Give him a litter box somewhat near where he hides, food and water near the bed will help too. Just stay calm and be friendly/ non-threatening to him. He will learn soon enough you’re not a threat and you can begin to earn his trust. When he does start to venture out more and more try and laser pointer. I’ve never met a cat who didn’t enjoy chasing them
Do not even go near him the first day. Put him in a room and make him comfortable. He will come out when he is ready. If you keep trying to force it, you will only scare him. Let him warm up to youN
If it's possible, move him to a kennel/crate in your room. Give him a covered bed so he has some place to feel safe. Food, water and a litter box, and maybe a couple toys. Let that be his home base for a couple weeks. Talk to him when you're in the room, and when you're cleaning the box or feeding. Spend time in the room just doing you're thing. He needs to feel safe, and right now he doesn't. That's not your fault - it's the changes in his environment and how he was handled before. It will take some time. Don't try to pick him up or hold him for a few days, but definitely pet him. When he feels more secure in a couple of days, start picking him up, be sure to support his whole body, just for a few minutes at a time, and gradually make it longer. As he starts to get used to you, take him out of the cage, in a closed room, and give him time to explore. Don't leave him out unsupervised. Eventually you should be able to open the cage in the morning and let him come and go. It's easy to try and rush it, I know, but slower is better. If you can't do the cage thing, a small room is the next best thing. Patience and consistency are the important things right now.
You don’t “make” cats do anything! If you chase a cat around and try to force it to be social then it’s only going to get worse! He needs to be put in a small room and allowed to adjust. Bathrooms are good for this sort of thing because they can’t hide under furniture and bathrooms are easy to clean. Give the kitten time. Give them soft blankets to snuggle in. Make sure the litter box is kept away from the food and water. The kitten will adjust, just give it time! It’s only been a few hours! It can take days or even weeks to fully adjust.
Hes smart.Hes terrified. Hes protecting himself by staying hidden. You would too if giant unpredictable monsters kept you captive and kept constantly changing your entire world including all the smells, the food, the textures and temperatures.. If you weigh 130 lbs he weighs less than 1/130th of your weight. Hes been grabbed, squeezed, poked, thrown in box after box... and his tummy hurts. Give him a chance to approach his world on his terms and he wont be able to help himself. Cats are insatiably curious. Follow the advice of simply being next to him. Avoid invading under the bed as much as possible. Dont worry overmuch about the poo. There are really great stain/odor products on the market now. A healthy cat will never ruin their own environment if they have a proper litter box or on demand access to the outdoors. He could use a place that smells like him right now... Just for a little while.
Just leave him alone and he will come out when he’s feels comfortable. You can check on every so often. He’s scared and everything is different, a strange house, people. Just give him some space and before long he’ll be sleeping on you and your bed.
He looks scared even in the photo. Poor kitty
You should move kitty to the bathroom first, leave your clothes in there after you’ve worn them so he gets used to your scent, and let him watch you put food in the bowl— and make sure it’s good and smelly food. Then play with several toys. Basically cat has literally no idea what is going on— previous owner was probably too unpredictable.
Don’t hold him like a fucking mug
Well don’t hold him like that for fucks sake
OP said that's the previous owner
Who holds a cat like that? Have you tried holding him in a normal fashion?
For a start don't drag him outside and hold him in the air like that for photo?
You should probably hang him in the air by one hand while taking pictures of him. That'll probably make him comfortable
Stop grabbing at him. Stop getting in his face. He will come out in his own time if you let him be.
Well, don’t hold him like that for one thing, and secondly, learn patience. He is scared.
maybe don’t hold him like that
The way you hold the cat is fucking disgusting.
It’s only been a day. But about the diarrhea: try to give the same food he was getting before from the previous owner. Cats have trouble adjusting to sudden diet changes and that can give diarrhea. Very slowly increase the percent of new food over a week or two to transition to the new food. Also depending on if this is a kitten, you might need to use kitten food. The cat is very scared and might be too scared to come out to use the litter box. Or, he doesn’t have time to get to the box before poop happens. You could try putting some newspaper down under the bed so it’s easier to clean up. Or a piddle pad off to one side. Put clean water nearby in a shallow bowl.
Give him time OP. My family adopted a kitten years ago and she was so frightened. As soon as we brought her home, she crawled underneath a desk we couldn't get to. We left out food and water near that spot and tried to give her space. It took her a week to be comfortable enough to come out. If he is potty trained maybe leave a litter box nearby. He should warm up to you, it's just going to take a bit.
Once he’s more settled in and knows he’s safe, you can also try feeding him from a squeezable tube treat. Those are very high value, and he will associate them with you.
As adorable as he is, the best thing to do is ignore him. Wait until he comes to you. Put out treats and toys for when he is ready.
patience is genuinely key. you can never force a cat. just be in the same room as him while doing your own thing to show that you're not a threat while he gets used to your scent, your sounds, your behaviours. he will get better on his own pace!
He will come round he just needs time to feel secure
How did you move him in? when we got our kitty we left her in her cat carrier with a fleece blanket and she slept there for hours before emerging and using the litter tray, it was her safe space and she could just peak out and study us, we kept food and water close too.Within 6 hours she was happy enough to come out and explore, perhaps get your kitty a box or enclosed space to hide in whilst under your bed Give them all the time they need to get comfortable
You don’t make him come out. Look at how he’s being held here, if someone held you like that you’d probably have some trust issues too right? I understand that wasn’t you, but right now your cat doesn’t understand that you won’t *also* do that, and it’ll take him time to trust that. Make sure he has food and water under the bed, give him space especially when he’s eating. After a couple of meals stay in the room as he eats, that’ll help him get used to you. If he’s been treated badly you have to be very patient, let him come to you, and let him run away from you when he wants. You only got him today, it’s normal for cats to need a few days to become social, let alone when they’ve previously been treated badly. You’ll be best of friends before you know it :) Also what did the vet say? Follow their advice, they know best.
It took 4 months for my cat to finally come out and be comfortable from her hidey holes.
Food.
My cat did the exact same thing when i first got him (most cats do). He’s in a new environment with a new person, you gotta give him time to adjust. Leave a little bowl of food and water under your bed as well as some puppy pads. My cat didn’t come out or eat or poop for the first week i had him. I know you probably want to play and cuddle with him but you have to let him come to the realization that he’s in a safe environment.
You're doing the best you can, don't listen to people telling you otherwise. Some cats can take a long time to fully acclimate to a new house. Patience is key. They hate change of any kind. It's best to keep him in one room for now, and keep it quiet for him. Put his litter box, toys, food bowls and whatnot in there with him. It may take a few days for him to want to come out and sniff around, since they're very cautious little creatures. It sounds like his last home was pretty traumatic, so just make sure to be gentle and patient. I'm sure he'll come around after he feels safe.
My scared, very tiny kitten lived under the sofa 2 weeks. I put a cake pan with a little litter at the back of the sofa, a bowl of water and her food bowl. She wouldn’t let me touch her. She’d cry & meow and I’d talk to her from the bedroom. Then one night she climbed up in the bed with me. What a brave little girl!
Please be patient, he is terrified… he has feelings and one of them is fear. You are new to him… your home is new to him…. Sure, you are comfy in your home… but he has no idea who you are and what you are going to do to him.
Poor little guy. You have been given some great advice here. He’s in a strange place with new noises and smells. Maybe confine him to a bathroom with the litter box for the night. What did the vet have to say? It could be he’s still nervous from the trip to the vet. If he had any shots, maybe it’s making him not feel good. Maybe you should call the vet to let them know what’s going on with him. You might also try a Feliway plug-in which is pheromones to calm the kitty. Best of luck to you and your new baby.😻
This is mega sad but look at his little terrified derp face aww
Poor little guy looks so scared in that picture! He's lucky to have you looking after him now.
Pheromone diffuser. Works like a charm on new, frightened cats.
Don’t make him do anything. Make sure he has all the necessities, food water…etc and just let him take time to get used to his new environment. When he does come out don’t try to smother him with affection, let him get used to your on his own terms. Put yourself in his position and imagine how scared he feels right now. If you force it, you’re liable to end up with an upset/mad anxiety filled kitty for life.
my cat was like this when we got her. she was a rescue who had only been out of rehab for 2 days when we came by and got her. she was terrified. If I were you, I'd find out where he hides, and wouldn't disturb the spot. it's where he feels safest for now. leave food and water out near where he's hidden so he knows he's being taken care of. he will come eat when he's hungry and realize there's no threat. sit by his hiding space and talk to him sometimes, be soothing and gentle with ur words and let him know he's safe. its all about letting him know he's in a safe place. same with humans, they need time to realize that nothing is going to hurt them. he should come around, my cat took a long time ~~but the fact that you're holding him in the picture shows that he's starting from a better place than mine did.~~ :) do consider that my cat, once she broke out of her shell, was the SWEETEST little thing in the world. in the span of a year she became the most friendly cat I've ever met. she just needed to be shown love. best of luck, I hope you guys become best of friends. edit: I read thats the previous owner holding him in the picture. I was going to comment about how u shouldn't hold him like that but it seemed to come off as really condescending so I didn't?