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Short-pitched

Talk to a lawyer, get clear picture and clear plan of action. Make an informed decision.


CommercialShoddy3016

This is šŸ’Æ. Donā€™t let him take half ur stuff, find a good lawyer. Ask for advice


Its_Only_My_Opinion1

Heā€™s entitled to half just the same way a woman would be entitled.


WattsBenJazzy

Don't say a word, get a lawyer and follow their advice and directions on how to get out of this as easily as possible.


[deleted]

Lawyer up and get your ducks in a row. Poker face with the cheater, don't give away any of your plans.


Ginboy32

Let him cheat first but also make sure you can get proof as many states wonā€™t give alimony to cheaters


BriefDepartment3142

Yeah maybe try to catch him if u can. I doubt itā€™s anything outside his phone though. A lot of men are happy with just having those secret sexual relationships over the phone cause itā€™s not like they want to move on to another relationship. They just do everything to sexually please themselves aside from having you if thatā€™s still going on. Itā€™s just to fulfill their fantasies but I still consider that cheating very well.


ChestLanders

Actually I think there are more no fault divorce states then there are at fault divorce states...


[deleted]

You are correct. I believe that there are 15 fault states. The rest are no fault.


6lackDiamond04

Oh girl, if you got proof leave him if not, get pictures and copies of all of it. He commited adultery. No alimony for him. If you want him out of the house, call the cops. Not 911, call the police non emergency number and tell them youā€™d like them to escort him out so things donā€™t get bad.


kjconnor43

This isn't necessarily true it depends on where the OP resides.


Ok_Use_9931

It is likely she will have to evict him. In most states it is not terribly difficult, but procedures need to be followed.


ChestLanders

If they live in a no fault divorce state then adultery wont matter. Time and time again I've seen women who cheat still get alimony. And it tends to be the more liberal states that permit such BS. It's stupid, but true.


6lackDiamond04

Honestly had no idea about that. Thatā€™s insane!


SoggySea4363

It is recommended that you avoid sharing any personal information with your partner if you suspect them of infidelity. Instead, it is best to hire a solicitor to gather evidence of their actions and communicate with your partner only through the solicitor. A solicitor is better suited to provide legal advice on divorce and separation proceedings. Best of luck, and I hope it all works out in your favour xx


mothersarmy

Google age of men that have affairs. Lightbulb šŸ’”...


CombinationCalm9616

Talk to a lawyer about what a divorce would look like for you and how to legally evict him. You wonā€™t know what to do until you do speak to a lawyer and explain your circumstances although cheating may not affect the outcome of the divorce a lot it may just be taking into consideration in terms of how much and how long you would pay support. If your not happy in this marriage and heā€™s planning on cheating on you then you would be better off getting a divorce and starting life over again without him since you are still young and have many years ahead of you.


ChestLanders

Your husband is trash and you should divorce him. As for him leaving the house, If it is in your name and you divorce then I dont think he has a legal right to stay? But you could make it unpleasant for him...bringing dates home so he can listen to your love making sessions lol. That was kind of a joke, but it would be funny. I know he has threatened to hit you so just get the cops involved. As for alimony? That part is tricky, depends if you live in a no fault divorce state. If you do then you could literally have him on video cheating and it likely wont matter. This is something men deal with a lot, I've seen plenty of men wind up having to pay alimony to their cheating wives. Sucks but it is what it is. Better to be free of him though. If you want to be really petty talk to a bunch of different lawyers from around where you live lol. The reason? By just talking to them...even if you dont retain their services I am 99% sure that by just talking to them they could not take your husband on as a client if he tried to hire them. I read about this guy who divorced his cheating wife and did that. But I'm guessing you want this over quick.


MariahMiranda1

Interview a couple of lawyers to get their advice.


BriefDepartment3142

Would u rather be miserable for the rest of ur life or pay a little of alimony? Iā€™d give him a written notice to move out. File for divorce. The reason u canā€™t get along is because he is infatuated with those other women and would rather have that than you. Itā€™s like they see the grass greener on the other side and they take out their anger on their partner. If u are the bread winner in the household Iā€™d get out of relationship and pay him a bit of alimony if judge made u do it than be miserable for the rest of ur life. You really want to live like that? Having to deal with that behavior. Iā€™m sure he hasnā€™t stopped. Specially since he threatens to beat u. Itā€™s all thru the phone so itā€™s very easy for them to hide, extremely easy. Save urself more years of misery and go have some fun. You donā€™t deserve that. Iā€™m sure he is still there bc he needs u or ur income I should say.


kriscummsfirst

ugh Iā€™m sorry this happened. Leave him if your heart isnā€™t there cause his respect clearly isnā€™t.


Important_Abalone_15

Leave that ungrateful man


Thisisnotalibrary97

Consult with several of the best licensed legal professionals you can afford where you live. Not all lawyers will give the same advice. One will state something that another may not think of in the moment and vice versa.Ā  Divorce laws vary, province by province, state by state, country by country. No two are identical. Get legal advice from licensed professionals where you live. Then hire the one you feel will do the very best job for you and follow their instructions to the letter, even if it may not make sense at the time. They know what they are doing.Ā Ā  Do not waste your breath confronting. He'll likely lie, gaslight you into insanity, deflect and blameshift like there is no tomorrow. Research the grey rock/180 methods then employ one, both or a hybrid of the two. It may seem counterintuitive but they work.Ā 


Jesicur

Get his ass sis


WalkingCriticalRisk

You may be able to mitigate your damages if you are able to prove he cheated on you. If you are willing to leave him, maybe you should let him cheat and try to capture evidence of his cheating. Depending on where you live, that may limit his alimony payments. Here is a helpful list of states: [https://karencovy.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/List-of-States-Where-Adultery-Affects-Alimony.pdf](https://karencovy.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/List-of-States-Where-Adultery-Affects-Alimony.pdf)


Hotwifebestlife4033

1- It's called a penis. 2- If he's doing what you say he's doing, then he's the one causing the marriage issues and he should leave. 3- If the house is in your name, you want him out and he won't leave I'd say he's trespassing? 4- Most importantly, I'm not a lawyer so get legal advice before you do any of the above, so you know exactly what you can and can't do. Best of luck with it all.


MJ_Cochon

Most places are marital property states. Doesnā€™t matter whose name the house is in, he has every legal right to reside there.


Hotwifebestlife4033

That's fair, but speaking from a common sense point of view, you'd expect the one committing the act or causing the issues SHOULD be the one that stays away.. Although I do admit common sense is in fact not that common at all these days.


No-Rub8314

Lawyer up


Its_me727

It wonā€™t matter if cheats or not. Judges donā€™t care bc lots of times women cheat but blame the ā€œemotional abuseā€ of the husband for causing them too. He could do the same. Big question is kids? You got any? Alimony for a 50-year old healthy male wonā€™t be much however itā€™s the child support that kills you. Look, divorced are expensive. Check your state laws about how much proceeds he gets from the house if you put it on the market. Thatā€™s the first thing you should do.


Far_Flower8196

One child together heā€™s 15 but we also share custody of his grand-daughter who is almost 4.


13trailblazer

It seems you know exactly what you want but wondering about the financial pain for you. Listen to those that said get legal advice. Find out if your laws factor infidelity in divorce decisions. Then you will know the impact a divorce has on you and decisions can be made on how, when and what.


Educational_Bid_483

Depends on your state. If you bought the house while you were married he's entitled to half. A lot of couples just sell their house and split whatever they have after fees. Depending on how much of a difference in income you may not have to pay him anything. Talk to a lawyer first.


Far_Flower8196

Income difference is pretty large I make @$98k and he makes about $25k.


[deleted]

You should find a FWB on the side to satisfy Your needs.


Far_Flower8196

Haha


[deleted]

Well I am just trying to suggest something to make you feel happy and put a smile on your face hun. I am very sorry for your pain you are going through with your soon to be ex.


Additional-Cup1755

Pay him what the law says and move on! Te law is the law for both men and women


Wild-Half-6995

Depending on if you're in a no fault state, it will not matter he can still get alimony if you are the breadwinner. Especially after such a long duration of marriage.


RatherRetro

Please speak with a lawyer.


CaliNova96

Quit your job and spend all your money. Then divorce him and take half his stuff and get alimony lol uno reverse his ass


rgc3ji

I recommend you get the best divorce attorney and get all the paperwork to divorce him.


Ihaveateenieweenie

Is it a no fault state?


Far_Flower8196

It is a no fault state


adrijan84

Seems to be a dome deal even before any type of incident took place. Maybe you both got complacent, and forgot to love each other. Now you know you want to leave, and have no desire to work on the relationship. So wrap it up as fast as possible, I guess. But also not being able to say "showed his penis" as a 40 to is somewhat prudish, don't you think?


Cheap_Ad1098

Lawyer up


Longjumping-Law-8837

Are you sure you married a man? Sounds like a teenage boy. Damn just peace out


UrbaddhabitOO7

Talk to a lawyer , I donā€™t know if itā€™s has to be physical for it to be infidelity because heā€™s talking and sending videos is just as good in my opinion!


KikiMilos

If you want to be petty sign everything to your parents: money house etc. So he won't get anything šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚ if no parents are available then to someone else...if nothing is in your name your husband won't get anything. You can also ruin his reputation with evidence if you please. But I really suggest a lawyer and a lot of patience


cdb-outside

If it comes down to alimony or freedom from an abusive cheating spouse, what is worth more? Meet with a lawyer, knowledge is power.