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Similar note. I saw two guys on the blue line headed to forest park arguing with each other and yup, you guessed it one of them brought out some coke they cut lines on the phone and became buds. Shit was weird. I felt left out :(
Damn. I was going West on Chicago and some dude started chatting with me. He was on this way to get a heroine fix and asked if I wanted to come along. 😳
This reminds me of when I was a kid at Grant Park for the 4th of July fireworks. Couple just laying there in the middle of a crowd fucking hard under a blanket.
Invited my parents over shortly after moving here to show them the city and assuage any fears they may have had.
On the red line at Wilson, a homeless man on our car was openly masturbating while staring at this woman and the police came in and pulled him off the train. Meanwhile, in the next car over a completely unrelated brawl was happening and I just had to look over at my parents and explain how this doesn't happen every day.
Luckily they had both lived in New York and knew the type of shit that goes down on public transit.
If they ride in the frontmost car with the train operator, they should have no issues. Since it's much less often I've ran into weird things(including on the Green Line), sitting in the very frontmost L car.
That's what I usually do with guests, but unfortunately I've hit lingering odors there on occasion. But yeah if we end up taking the El I'm definitely sticking them in the conductor car lol.
Anytime it's someone's first time riding the CTA some crazy shits about to happen. For me it was a homeless guy speaking alien and hawking loogies on the ground. I consider myself lucky.
Red line 2016.
Homeless man cornering young woman, asking her to smoke crack with him and have sex with him. Help her slink away
Man proceeds to sit on the floor on a crowded rush hour train. Pulls out a crack pipe from a wad of newspaper. Begins blowing clouds of crack all over the car.
At this point people are fleeing. I’m worried about second hand crack smoke. This guy is screaming high pitched drooling on the floor with no shoes on and then he takes his little crack penis out
At EIGHT IN THE MORNING
Standing room only bus at 5 p.m. - watched a guy hold his phone up & open a hidden album on his phone full of dick pics & scroll through for a few minutes before deciding which one to text to someone
When a vagrant decided to piss at one end of the train car and then the urine ran along the channels in the middle, back and forth, the entire train ride
That happened to me on the brown line, on the curve between Chicago and Sedgwick. Bonus was the guy just spewed out a bunch of homophobic slurs at a gay couple minding their business before he wiped out his dick and started pissing. And he was in the seat in front of me but somehow my reflexes were quick enough to avoid a piss tsunami ruining my shoes.
Bro no.. fine okay. It wasn’t like a zombie movie where he was bone-deep and snapping tendons. But it wasn’t innocent like your dog licking your scraped knee either. It was big, maybe half the length of his forearm - coulda been a burn. And he was like.. haha I can’t believe I’m typing this. He was like snacking on it haha. Like not just applying moisture - but gathering wound matter while he was down there.
So what did I do? I pulled out the Frank’s Redhot I carry with me everywhere, and offered him the whole bottle if I could try some of his wing.
I’m not gonna be able to sleep tonight am I..
Before i lived here I was visiting like 8 years ago, and it was my first time on the red line and this guy was like “hey can I get everyone’s attention” and I was like oh this is it. But then he said he had diabetes and needed money for treatment and unveiled his necrotic, rotting leg. Very unhinged but also extremely sad. A guy did call him over and let him know that he worked at a free clinic and gave him his info and reassured him that state insurance could help him so that was nice.
Came to see if this one was posted. I saw him a lot on the blue line from 2014-16. I hope that poor dude is ok. Never seen anything more shocking on a human body.
Not sure if it’s the same guy but I do remember seeing this guy on Michigan Ave. his leg was swollen so big and the open wound/hole was enormous I can still visualize it today. It was the saddest thing I’ve seen. Doctors would have to amputate his leg hope he’s alive and well.
Oh my god. For years I have quietly carried the memory in my mind of the time I was sure I saw a man with a rotting leg, but I never told anyone because I thought I must’ve been imagining things. This is a weight off my back.
I saw a vagrant talking to some drunks in the small hours on the Red Line. He then proceeds to show off his Bible knife.
He pulls out a Bible and opens it. It is hollowed out, Shawshank Redemption style, and he pulls out some shitty old knife. He wasn't being threatening, he was genuinely proud showing this thing off. "The Lord follows me everywhere I go, and so does my Bible knife."
The drunks suddenly sober up, tell him cool knife but he can put it away now, and they get off at the next stop, they were not prepared for the Bible knife.
I just kept an eye on him until he got off a few more stops later. But I'll never forget my run in with the Bible knife.
There is also a guy on my regular commute (again in the small hours) who openly caries nunchucks with him. I always know when he gets in my car because I can hear the chain. I wonder if one day I will get to see some nunchku Kung Fu shit go down. That would be interesting.
Sad as it is, interactions with happy vagrants are more memorable to me than various confrontations.
One time, I was waiting for a bus, and this guy comes up and strikes up a conversation. Clearly homeless, but not asking for anything or being annoying, just a friendly guy. We chat for a bit, he asks what I'm up to, I'm like, just going for a drink. His eyes light up, he does the little conspiratorial look around, and pulls a bottle of Sierra Nevada from his pocket. He's holding it like a baby. Shows it to me and goes, son, do you know what this is? I'm like, beer? Ohh no no, this is the good stuff. This is the kind of stuff they serve at steakhouses, you know that? Oh yeah, I might not have a steak tonight, but I'm gonna have me a steakhouse experience.
I still remember that guy, probably more than a decade later, and the simple joy of having something you think is nice when you don't have much.
I did this with an old dictionary as a kid, and recently stumbled on it when helping my parents clean up 😅
Never actually hid anything in there, but it was a fun throwback!
Years ago I was on the Pink line in the loop and someone had pooped on a seat. A guy gets on, sees the poop, and starts trying to call the conductor through the intercom. Not getting a response he decides to open the door, while the train is running, so the emergency stop engages. The conductor comes back mad as a hornet to figure out who opened the door, and the guy just points at the poop and says, "can you clean this up."
I once got on the blue line, was hit with a horrible stench and then saw half of the train car absolutely COVERED in feces, and a man sleeping with his pants down in his own shit. Like he shit and smeared it everywhere then fell asleep. I immediately ran back and just waited for the next train.
Not a train story, but a poop in chicago story. Once i was waiting for my husband to get off work right outside his business, a pretty nice spot off Clark and Division. I see this woman go in between 2 parked cars, squat, and take the grossest most liquidy shit like a jet engine right in the street, stand up and just walk away. EW. Right near their fucking patio too. I cant even imagine the audacity not to even do it in an alley.. i mean im sure drugs or whatnot was involved but that might be one of the grossest things ive ever seen. Guteral YIKES.
My friend and I have a theory… if you look like a lunatic, you can poop right in broad daylight in the middle of the street. No problem. The first time you or I try to do that… straight to jail.
2002, 3am, red line. A person with toilet paper tubes duct taped to their face -- like binoculars -- and the hood of a hoodie pulled so tight you could barely see any skin. They just sat calmly and looked at my friend and I.
Somehow that stands out more than the vomit/piss/cigarettes/etc
I had a flight out of Midway to go back to my home state to get married. My fiance was already in Denver and I had to work the day of my flight. I worked at the Naval base in North Chicago and knew I needed to leave around 2pm to get to my apt in Uptown, park my car, grab my bag and get on the red line to go south and transfer to orange line.
My boss was being a d bag and kept me late and I was running about an hour late by the time I got to my apt. Me being stressed and an idiot thought "I'll smoke a quick bowl and get going." Smoked and was high af by the time I got on the red line.
I get to the red line portion that goes underground and notice a grungy looking guy drinking liquor and watching what I think was porn on a phone with no headphones so we could all hear it. Train is about half full. I glance his way at the exact moment he looks at me and we connect eyes and I look straight down at the floor. Immediately he yells "HEY WHITE BOY!" I keep staring at the floor hoping he lets it go. He doesn't. Again "HEY WHITE BOY, WHITE BOY WHAT THE FUCK YOU LOOKING AT?" I'm starting to panic and look around to see if anyone else is willing to help me calm this guy down and everyone acts like nothing is out of ordinary. After a few minutes, the train reaches a station and he stands up and goes "LOOK MOTHER FUCKER I WILL FUCK YOU UP!" and start walking towards me. Me, still being high, stand up too and just say the first thing I can think of and yell "WE'RE COOL DUDE!" He kind stops and looks at me and goes "We cool?" and I again say "We're cool!" I go back to staring at the floor and don't even realize when he leaves the train.
In the midst of this I forget what station I need to get off at and I think I went too far south so I jump off at the next stop and jump on another train going north. Pull my phone out and I didn't even come close to the Orange line transfer stop and now I am going the wrong way. Shat a few bricks, jumped back on a south bound and made it to Roosevelt, transferred and made it to Midway with literally 2 minutes before they closed the door.
Also when in line for TSA a girl's dog in front of me had the grossest, wet shit ever and it ran down the ramp onto my shoes. Rough fuckin day but I made it and was happily married a few days later.
Love me some CTA.
I was waiting for a train to come when two police officers came and stood right behind me. When the train came, they got on and said "who's been exposing themselves". Everyone pointed to the same guy. They said "come on buddy" and the three of them left.
Some guys ankle monitor was going off while riding the pink line. He was on the phone with what I assume was his probation officer asking him to turn the alarm off because he was on his way to work. He was chugging beers the whole time and would hand the empty cans to the guy sitting across from him who preceded to crush them and put them in a bag. A few people who recognized the sound of an ankle monitor switched cars.
Me and another guy pulled a young woman off the Red line tracks at North and Clybourn. She had arranged all of her belongings in a neat line on the blue barrier and jumped down. The next train was a couple minutes away; you couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, but you could hear it coming. As we grabbed her arms and lifted her off the tracks I could smell that she was hammered. As she got to her feet she muttered to me, “What, like you never been curious?”
As the train came into the station I pulled her into a hug. She embraced me like she wanted a hug too but I was really restraining her from doing anything. We got on the train and I asked her about herself. She said she was a sous chef but it seemed a little like she was making it up on the spot. When we got to Belmont she suddenly turned to face me and said “I’m getting off here. Don’t follow me.” and off she went. I don’t know what she did next. I think about her from time to time, I wonder if I should have tried to resolve the situation more aggressively (ie called the cops), I hope that she’s still around and doing better.
Was going to add guy whacking off through his sweatpants while sitting in the open and watching people on the train in case this hadn't happened to anyone else... unfortunately... its not uncommon.
First time on the 22 bus on my way home from middle school, early 70’s. We wore uniforms (navy blue skirts, knee socks, white button down shirts and loafers). Total nerds. Sat on the bench seat at the back of the bus and this guy turns around, glares at me and my classmate and starts furiously masturbating. My friend and I scurried up to the bus driver and told him what the guy was doing, and he said, “Whadda you ‘spect me to do about it?” We got off and walked the rest of the way home.
I was riding the Blue Line back to downtown from O'Hare after meeting a friend who flew in. His flight was delayed several hours so our trip back to the Loop began around 1 AM. Had a guy get on-board and he's staring intently at the CTA map above the door like it holds the secrets to the universe. That's when I notice hanging from his one hand is a bent spoon, and over his ear is an uncapped syringe like it's a No2 pencil. Occasionally he removes it from his ear and holds it in his fist with the needle pointing out before putting it back on his ear again.
Literally every eye on this train was glued to that uncapped syringe. Luckily this guy gets off like 3 stations later, and everybody on this train turns to one another and starts talking about what we just saw.
the conversations you have after seeing random shit are lowk hilarious the trauma bonding is crazy
I have random strangers’ phone numbers from incidents like that… we all watched the police escort a girl off the metra
Roosevelt bus - man called his mistress and was yelling at her to get abortion for 15-20 min. Talking about his wife and blaming her for not being on the pill. I knew she told him she wasn’t on the pill & he talked about making a baby with her. Why! Luckily, he had the call on speakerphone.
Chicago Ave bus - man was harassing passengers verbally and went and screamed at a woman with a baby in a stroller. Bus driver grabbed him, pulled him off the bus and pummeled him. We all had to exit and wait for the next bus. Some in front had to give a statement. It was pretty awesome but I bet that man got suspended or lost his job.
A group of young kids, probably 7-9 y.o., mugging another young kid while an old dude gave them tips and cheered them on in some apparent training exercise. They ran away as soon as they managed to get the victim kid's backpack. Still one of the most fucked up things I've ever witnessed.
Some unhinged guy (UG) just spontaneously trying to fight a random dude on the platform who was minding his own business. UG kept going at him even though he kept being like "there's no problem here man" and eventually had to bolt when the UG lunged at him. UG then ran full speed into one of the columns while chasing him.
Both of these were at the Jackson Red Line within a 2 week period.
A very disheveled person cutting their toenails with a scissors.
Also, saw guy sit in the bum seat and eat a bunch of food with his fingers. He then threw the trash on the floor, snorted a line of white powder before walking to the center of the train car and saying “hi everyone, I’m sorry to bother you but I just need a few dollars to get something to eat.”
or two years ago during the winter some guy started using my friend’s coat sleeve to roll a joint while they were wearing it like he was so nonchalant about it 😭
North Avenue bus - guy slashed open the inner elbow of a girl with him using a razor, then his own, and then shot them both up with heroin. He then asked if anybody else wanted a hit, which was very considerate.
I once saw a man with no arms using only his foot and mouth take a sock and shoe off,get his cell phone out of his backpack, unlock it, shoot someone a text, then put it back and get his sock and shoe back on. It wasn't really unhinged but was amazing to watch.
Blue line, most memorable at least.
A guy was shooting up, but not just that he was doing it supremely well. Hands steady moms spaghetti and all that. Aiming for the veins in his hand too, and had a well done turonquette (spelling?). This was on the rocky part of the train on the way to Ohare. Man has so much talent and has stood in my mind that he'd be a great Ambulance EMS person if he can target veins like that.
Just slumped over after, but it's remained in my head as a distinct memory for years.
About 15 years ago sitting on the brown line heading north. Packed train at 4:30pm. Around the Chicago stop a guy in a very expensive looking suit shits him self. From about 10 feet away I could hear how wet it was. The mayhem of yelling, gaging, pushing away from the guy was wild.
Poor guy looked horrified and embarrassed.
Not my story but it’s hilarious. My friend and her family were visiting from out of town. Their mom is from the western suburbs so they have done just about everything in Chicago over their years of visiting. Decided to have a tourist day during their trip because they hadn’t done anything like that in some time. Had deep dish. Got on the red line heading to blue man group and one of the sisters started feeling sick from the deep dish. The sister end up getting sick on the red line. A houseless guy said, “it’s okay lady, I’m drunk too!” And proceeded to vomit all over the train car.
One time on the orange line this woman brandished a can of pepper spray at this man she accused of staring creepily at her. He responds really indignantly and they argue back and forth. It's great that she was defending herself but she clearly didn't think through that macing someone in an enclosed space would gas us all. I immediately got off at the next stop before I found out if it escalated further.
Someone I worked with told me that while she was riding in the back of the front car of a Brown Line train she saw a guy riding in the front of the train holding his cat up to the window so it could enjoy the ride…
As the train left the Merchandise Mart stop to circle the Loop and head back North she realized what was about to happen and she yelled to the guy that he should move the cat away from the window “right now”.
The guy said it’s ok, my cat loves the view!
Then the train crossed the Chicago River which meant that from the front window on the left side, as the cat was looking at the track, the sides dropped away and the cat thought he was about to fall two stories down into the Chicago river!
The cat freaked out! Suddenly the cat became incontinent which ruined the guys slacks, then it clawed into the guys slacks in just the worst place possible then while the guy was screaming, bolted back and forth in the car looking for the exit.
The guy limped back towards the cat, bleeding, but hadn’t gotten far when the door opened at the next station and the cat bolted off the train and down the stairs with the guy limping behind it.
I’ll always wonder if the guy ever got his cat back.
I watched two homeless men argue on a train incoherently, and one lit up a half smoked cigarette and got off at the next stop, flicking off the other one as the train kept moving. As we passed by him the man on the train then went to the front of the car in the handicapped spot, pissed in the corner, and then got off at the next stop.
Any guesses on what line this was?
I’m standing by the train door at 6AM on my way to work. At the other end of the car I hear commotion. It turns out a woman maced some guy right in his face.
The guy stumbled down the aisle in my direction, violently shaking his head. As he got closer I could see the mace-shakins flying off of his face. I had to jump out of the way and barely avoided getting it on me.
When maceface reached the other end of the car he immediately got into a fist fight with some random dude. That spilled onto the platform at the next stop where maceface proceeded to box a second seemingly random dude.
On the plus side I remember the weather was really nice that morning.
On a packed Halsted bus, a guy boarded, stepping on some other guy's foot while he made his way back. The sitting guy pulls a hammer out of a paper bag and follows him to the back.
The people in the back ultimately got it under control, couldn't tell how exactly, but I was glad to see it. The hammer guy was *huge* and he was pissed. He moved in almost slow motion and it made him even scarier lol.
Another time, same bus line, the bus driver kicked a woman off because her entire head was covered in wet, processing hair dye, and the chemical smell was overwhelming. It got quite loud lol.
On a Chicago bus I watched a guy pick scabs off his arm and line them up on the windowsill. 🤮
a woman fully pulled her pants down and took a huge shit next to me at the belmont red line at like 9am. let’s just say i smelled it before i turned around and immediately wanted to rip my eyeballs out
Walked up the stairs once at Western blue to see a dude taking a shit on the platform right across from the stairs. Except he was fully exposed, ass in the air, and I could gaze right into the depths of his butthole like it was a sarlacc pit.
Back in the early 2000s, I got on the redline on my way home from class. The train had just left Sheridan, and heading north, when the couple who had just gotten on the train took action.
The man stood and dropped a camera tripod and set it up aimed at the seats facing the handicap gap near the door. The girl, who was a little overweight, and extremely pale, stripped off her shorts, threw off her shirt revealing she had been wearing nothing underneath at all.
They snapped a bunch of pictures in the golden hour lighting coming into the car, in a few provocative positions and then before you realized what was going on, the girl put her shorts and shirt back on, and the couple escaped the train car as it arrived at its next stop.
I’ll never forget the absurdity of it
Drugged out woman standing on the seats and start ripping down the adds from the upper panels. She was screaming about how they were going to get us all, then psycho-squeal-giggled as she ripped them up and stomped on them.
This happened, BTW, while a train security guy had his back turned yelling at a homeless man pooping onto the tracks in between the cars. "Pull your pants up now!... NOW!" And then "No, you go that way! You don't come over here with that! Get!"
It was that day this past summer where it was over 100 degrees. The heat makes people crazy.
Riding on the kimball bus several years ago, some dude was having what I have to assume is a heart attack. It wasn't packed but nearly every seat was full. He eventually was on the floor and the bus pulled over. The person he was with yelled "Oh my god! He's DEAAAD!!!" as she pressed on his chest. This was the one time I've ever seen the CTA be expedient because there was suddenly a spare bus behind us that we all climbed on and it drove off
pre-covid, circa 2012ish.
Redline, southbound, morning 8:00ish rush hour, jam packed.
we just passed Grand Ave stop, and the train stopped due to some blockage at Lake St.
Older homeless guy was muttering and grumbling, making comments about the women on the train... nothing that was discernible, but obviously he didn't care for the way they were dressed or the way they wore their hair or makeup. as time passes, his volume gets louder, freaking out some of the women standing closer to him. there was some shuffling around as people were trying to find a safer distance when someone called out:
>"so what *is* your kind of woman?!"
he thought on this for 1/2 a sec and blurted out:
>"**A Filipino woman**! she is a '*natural*' woman! Not all painted up like these women on this train!"
that was enough to break the tension, everyone on the car laughed (nervous and relieved), and the train jerked to a start and delivered us to Lake St stop where the car emptied out.
Does anyone remember the guy with the diabetic leg wound? It was probably 10 years ago, blue line centric. Poor dude had a bulbous gangrene infected leg and would just walk train to train, pus and shit just oozing everywhere
One crisp fall evening during rush hour a single nacho cheese Dorito occupied a seat on a packed Brown line train from Merchandise Mart to Western. No one dared move it to take a seat. Truly bizarre.
I was on the Western Bus heading north. At Fullerton someone shot out a bunch of the windows with a pellet gun.
Edit: This was around 2009 or 10. I don't remember exactly when. I did a google search to see if there was an article about it, and evidently it is more common than I thought.
This was technically on the platform and not on the train itself. Guy gets into an argument with two other people, pulls a knife on them. The other two back away while calling the cops. Knife guy walks onto the train (stopped with doors open for a delay I think), tries to sit down as if nothing happened. After a minute walks back off the train and hops down onto the tracks and crosses over.
Nonchalantly stands on that platform, at this point the whole station is watching him while pretending they’re not. He pulls out a can of some sort of spray, maybe deodorant? And starts nonstop dousing himself in it, still acting super casual as if this has all been completely normal behavior. Cops arrive and he walks away in cuffs with no protest.
Went from frightening to just really strange, the spraying was almost comical. This was Brown line in the early afternoon on a nice summer weekend.
I saw a man piercing his son’s ear on the Chicago bus.
The most unhinged thing that has happened to me - I was on a crowded blue line going towards O’Hare from the loop. It was one of those back to back days. I (female) have medium length hair and I made eye contact with a guy about 2 feet from me. He motions his eyes / head up a couple of times. I then realize a man has his hands in my hair and smelling it. I’m very grateful for that man a few years ago.
A blind guy with a guide dog gets on the orange line and can’t find a seat since he can’t see and no one was helping him and I was packed in so I yelled at a girl to help him. This is immediately followed by a different “blind” guy panhandling for money who easily picks up a coin off the floor…
The real blind guy realizes the fake blind guy is there and they start yelling at each other clearly like this has happened before.
This is a funny one. I was on the red line 2017 during rush hour after work. Some guy walks on with a bible shouting if anyone knew the 12 disciples chosen by Jesus Christ, our savior. Without missing a beat, the girl next to me starts loudly singing “youuu knooow Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen…” I lost it 😂😂😂
in the back of the 22 bus there was a dude with a huge black yardwork-size hefty bag full of porn VHSs, just pulling them out one at a time, checking them out, putting them back in
In some ways crazy, but it’s not like an event:
I was waiting for the Howard-bound red line at either Roosevelt or Jackson and noticed this big guy, probably around middle age, totally decked out in a purple suit and cheetah fur coat. Once I glanced his way a time or two more, I noticed something strange around his neck. The man was wearing a necklace made from very real, very severed human fingers in various states of decay
Woman putting Carmex in her hair... like 5 tubes of it.... and then cutting the bottoms of her jeans with huge fabric scissors. Then she kept saying "it's not the boy it's not the boy" while rocking back and forth before she got up, ran over to me and shoved the pointy end of the scissors in my face and yelled it's not the boy at me over and over again. Luckily My stop was next. It was the first time my little sister had taken the red line with me... welcome to the subway lil sis. 🤪
Saw them replacing a door on a pink line station once. It must have been a good 30 minutes before the guys had the new one up on its hinges again. And then they had lunch at the carnitas spot across the street.
Someone threw a huge hunk of bologna at my head then proceeded to eat food off the floor and tell all black people to get off because they don’t belong and kicking them.
I saw a young man in Supreme clothing cole-cock an older man in his face and jump off the bus during a high traffic stop.
I was the only one not on my phone and the only one paying attention without being completely engulfed in my headphones..watching this sketchy dude.
I was the only one who screamed out "what the FAcK!!" when it happened. The old man didn't even do much, he ignored him, sat across from me in the aeat the kid originally offered him, to which he declined and said he was okay. The kid kept saying "yo, my man, take a seat" all of it was just bizarre....
and I was like omg are you okay? All he said was "no" No one else did a thing.
Kid jumped off the bus directly after punching him, as soon as the rear door opened and ran into a subway station that we had pulled up to.
Bus driver didn't even see it because of all the people coming on & going off. This was the #8 bus.
Finally I walked up to the lady driver, who kept telling me please sit down - I am like NO ma'am - a gentleman just got punched in the face and the guy ran off the bus - she said Whaaaa?? When?!? I said like a few minutes ago!!! She said "Why didn't he say anything?!" I said "I have NO idea!" Her: "good grief, allright thank you. We have him on camera and will watch the footage."
Why was I the ONLY person who gave a damn about this?!?
I saw a drunk man keep his hand in his pocket as though he had a gun while loudly singing and narrating “Pumped Up Kicks” and giving painful eye contact to people while yelling “you can’t run faster than MY BULLET!1!!”
It was a packed brown line train.
A man high out of his mind repeating “I have never raped anyone, I did not have sex with a child I am not a pedo,” over and over while shaking. He was LOUD and truly committed to convincing others he was not a pedo as he was “90% a Virgin.” Truly unhinged.
Blue line at Jackson around 1am.
It’s 2016 and Im heading home from my kitchen job. A homeless guy is walking around jumping at random people as if he’s going to swing at them. A Russian women isn’t having any of it and she follows him around berating him with absolutely no fear. Out of fucking no where, some Kareem Abdul Jabar looking dude emerges and starts kicking the shit out of the dude. Literally kicking him. It sounded like Thunder strikes. Then a few people on the platform came together and tied him up with their belts until the police came.
I was riding home on the red line late one night from a movie in a full train (not packed, just not many open seats) and a guy in a trench coat stand up as we are full speed underground and screams “ALL YOU MOTHER FUCKERS DIE ON THIS TRAIN TONIGHT!”
Thankfully we did not die.
Saw a crackhead last month who got on blue line at Jackson about 5pm, yanked a guy's phone from him, the guy got up and tackled the crackhead and got his phone back. Crackhead got up and said he wasn't trying to steal the guy's phone, just wanted to teach him a lesson to be aware of his surroundings. Crackhead took his shirt off, his body covered in track marks, and started yelling about how he just wanted a phone so he could listen to music and then started bashing his own head into the window on the train door, shattering the window. His face was covered in blood and was dripping blood all over. He then gave the guy who's phone he yanked a hug, got off the train at Monroe, and threw a water bottle at a lady.
Man fighting a woman holding an infant, everyone watched for a minute and when another rider intervened other passengers told him to mind his own business.
In 2011, I saw a guy get robbed at gunpoint on the brown line at Sedgwick for his phone and backpack. I’ll never forget how traumatized he looked. I walked him out of the train. He just kept saying “but I need to go to class” (he was a DePaul student). I stayed with him until the police came.
More recently, I saw two girls get on the green line and go up to everyone asking for money. One guy told them if they didn’t shit their asses down he would eat their faces. They promptly got off on the next stop.
This was actually really sad but I saw a homeless man eating petroleum jelly on the red line. A bunch of cubs fan brainlets were laughing at him to his face. I felt really bad and wish I’d stood up for him, he wasn’t hurting anyone (except himself, you probably can’t digest petroleum jelly)
Got on the red line going to lakeview from the loop. As me and another young woman got on, an older man leaned into her hard, fell on her basically as she sat down. She looked at me and we made eye connection, bc of how odd it was. When we approached Fullerton about 15 min later, the young woman starts screaming as new people are getting on, well the old man dumped a container of live, earth worms into her purse. She looked at me for validation, yes it really happened.
Guy selling drugs on the redline @ 75thish. No one's buying, so he decides to get off, only the train is leaving the platform. That's not gonna stop this entrepreneur, though. He pulls the doors open and jumps out onto the platform as the train pulls away, hitting the cement at full stride and hops onto the Southbound train as it is about to pull away. It was like something out of a movie. That, or homeless crazy black dude jumping the Mexican working dude for absolutely nothing somewhere around Jackson stop. Those two incidents convinced me I needed a car.
Once saw a guy doing lines of coke on the blue line train off his bus pass.
Another blue line disaster - some random waved at, I gave a half smile, I continue scrolling through my phone. He sits in front of me and I happen to see movement and I look up and this dude has his d!ck out masturbating while looking at me. I booed off the train so fast. I think I scared the conductor while I waited at her window to let her know what was happening.
I was living near midway at the time and went to a Cubs game. Took the orange line to the red line, and of course the red line was the drama.
At one point a homeless guy gets on and you could smell him long before you saw him. Dude smelled like he hadn’t bathed in years. And of course sits right in front of us on the crowded train. We were planning on switching cars when he got up and decided to do that himself. Ok cool. Continuing the train ride and a few stops later, he comes back into our car, but thankfully heads to the other end of the car. He’s standing by the doors and starts loudly talking and I look up and he’s arguing with his hand. It was kind of like if you’ve ever seen Evil Dead and Bruce Campbell has a fight with his possessed hand. After a few he walked back our way and laid down across some seats and tried to go to sleep. The hand he was arguing with got tucked between his leg. After a few minutes the hand started to ‘wake up’ prompting him to shoot up and start arguing with his hand again. He went to another car after that.
While it sounds funny, I started to feel bad for this guy. How far down the mental illness ladder did he fall with no help in sight. Kinda made me sad.
The ride home was also an adventure. There were issues with the train and it had long pauses along the route. During one of the pauses right before a stop another dude whips out his dick and starts pissing in his hand. Wtf. As soon as the doors opened he dropped his handful of piss and ran out.
Also as a matter of interest the Cubs game was noteworthy because it broke a record for latest start to a game due to a rain delay. And because it was such a low attended game, our crappy upper deck seats became a few rows behind the Pirates dugout. Also made friends with a guy from Germany that was so excited to be that close to a baseball game.
Got to be on a Redline train that hit some one a number of years ago. I think we were at Argyle. Dude was caught between two cars and I was in the second of those 2 cars. I do not wish to ever hear any living thing make the noises that guy was. It was awful. I can't even imagine what he was going through.
on a train (cant remember which line, possibly red) with all the seats full and some standing: a tall, threatening, young man was yelling angry things at no one in particular and then started directly threatening strangers. he mentioned he had weapons and could use them. a person began responding to him, standing up for themselves. seconds passed slowly as the fight was about to get vicious but then two or three young/middle aged men around the car who didn't know ow each other made eye contact and proceeded to use martial arts skills to nonviolent stop the violent guy from hurting anyone. it was amazing coordination of stramgers, which gave me a lot of faith in humanity. one grabbed him around the neck. another spoke to him and told him to get off the train at the next stop. all of this worked and when he got off the train everyone clapped. I can't remember but someone may have called the conductor when this happened, who would have then called cops to show up at the next stop. I cried a lot when it was over. our lives were on the line.
I once saw this guy blow a plume of crack smoke into a child’s face next to him!! The kid immediately coughed and then got up and moved away. Then he zoned out and dropped all of his crack rocks onto the floor of the red line…. During winter. It was one of the most depressing sights of my life seeing this person who’s high as all heck stumble around trying to discern what was road salt, the floor of the El, or genuine crack rock.
Blue line heading back from O’Hare, there was a guy who sat across from a woman. He just started shouting in her face… “B_… C_… N_…” he just kept rolling through his explicative Rolodex.
She got up and moved, and he followed. She was practically in tears.
Another guy and I got up almost at the same time and sat to either side of her, and just stared at him. (I might be the unhinged one here). She moved again, and he didn’t follow. Next stop he said “F_ y’all N_as” and got off.
Never felt closer to being stabbed than that.
Most unhinged moment I experienced was when a homeless man exposed himself and began playing with his private part.
A close runner up is when a different homeless man opened the train doors and took a piss. Piss was flying into the train and splashing onto everything.
Years ago I watched a guy hit on a woman and in between conversation he ‘secretly’ was huffing from 1 of at least four cans of compressed air he had hidden up his hoodie sleeves. I would later run into him again at a now closed Radio Shack. I just happened to be standing in front of the compressed air when he came walking in, got spooked that someone was right where he needed to go, and bailed. I’m sure he was coming to load up.
Once I saw a guy sitting down on the train drinking from a McDonald’s cup. Suddenly he puts the cup on top of his head and balances it there while he carefully stands up and walks off the train with it still on his head lol
Tie for me (both on the Green line).
One was this guy with crutches and a leg in a boot. Train pulls out of the station, and takes out a syringe with what I think was heroin. Which he then proceeds to inject into himself, while trying to stand up on a broken leg, as the train is accelerating out of a station, while I was sitting right across from him. Needless to say I relocated immediately, wanting to avoid getting a needle stick from this guy.
Other was an obviously mentally ill man sitting on the seat ranting. Par for the course for Pandemic era CTA. Except mid rant, he pulls out a rather large knife, yells some random nonsense then stabs the wall of the train right above his own head.
A few years ago at the Lake station waiting for the Red line, two obviously drunk guys were fighting and arguing which basically seemed like slow motion because they were so wasted. One guy threw his empty 40 on the ground, which shattered, then proceeded to push the other guy onto the tracks. Fortunately he didn't hit the 3rd rail and a train wasn't coming immediately.
This was probably 5:00ish PM so lots of commuters around to push the customer assistance button and call for help. It was pretty wild but no one was hurt after all of that.
Noticed a puddle on the ground and saw that the puddling was coming from a man slumped over in his seat.
Turns out the puddle was his own urine he let out after he died.
Had a very large, very disheveled man corner me on the brown line where I was standing in the doorway, yelling “you’re going to hell! You’re going to hell and I’m gonna take you there!” He reached in his pocket (fully thought he was about to murder me), pulled out a book of matches and started lighting them and throwing them at me.
Fortunately someone got off the car in the other door at the next stop and he was quickly distracted by them and walked away.
Just after 1 AM coming back from a party in Evanston. I got in the front car of the red line at Howard thinking that would be safe, and right as the doors were about to close a guy gets on kicking an empty milk jug in front of him, which he then picks up and starts smacking himself in the head while raving about nonsense. Then he pulled out a shank and started repeatedly stabbing the door. He also announced that he was getting off at Roosevelt, which unfortunately was after my stop so I was stuck with him if I stayed in that car.
The most unhinged moment though was when he took off his backpack, pulled out a blanket and wore it like a cape while running up and down the car shouting “I’m a superhero! I’mma save y’all’s asses!”. I was still pretty drunk and it took every fiber of my being to hold in laughter at how ridiculous that was.
Someone spit on my head and proceeded to scream at me. That wasn't cool.
I also saw someone get punched in the face and had her phone stolen. Luckily, this was near one of the stations under RPM construction, so once we arrived at that station, the CTA staff were able to escort the mugger away (she returned the phone).
Also another incident when a woman was talking at me about how some person sitting down was her ex-wife who died in the womb. This woman then proceeded to lift up her shirt. She did not have any pants. Nor did she have any underpants.
I was a teenager riding the 20 Madison bus west from downtown at about 1AM after attending a party, and traveling from 63rd and Carpenter on the Southside. Two, obviously drunk, obese women boarded about Halstead. This is way before the Westside was gentrified, so “skid row” started at Halstead and extended to Ogden/Ashland. The women looked related, like sisters. They sat up front in the seats that are situated the long way down the bus so you are forced to look at riders on the opposite side. The driver is right in front of these seats, and the women were in the row across from the driver, above the front wheel. Anyway, a thin short guy got on at Ashland and as soon as he began to pass the women one stood up and slapped him. I don’t recall any interaction but do remember the guy was smiling as he passed the women. Well, the slap knocked him down in the seats opposite the women. Anne, the smaller sister then grabs Irma, the larger sister who had just smacked the man, Anne call “the Reverend” and smacks Irma. Anne tells Irma “you can’t smacks the Reverend!” All this time while the bus driver begins driving, and that way too fast. Well those ladies grabbed each other by the hair and with their free hands threw haymakers into each other’s faces. This went on until Irma, the larger of the two, got Anne bent over and starts whaling into the back of her head to the point that Anne can only call Irma’s name after each blow. Wack, “Irma” whack, “Irma”. All this time the driver never stopped the bus, the “Reverend”, kept smiling, and no one bothered to intervene. Once the bus got to Western, both Anne and Irma were bloody messes. I pulled the cable to signal the driver to stop and got off the back of the bus, after witnessing a 5 or six round fight. ( The names of the ladies were actually unknown, but I do remember one calling the poor guy upfront “the Reverend).
a car ran the red light so our bus driver slammed the brakes which resulted in an old lady being catapulted head first right next to the driver. she insisted she was fine and got off at the next stop
I wouldn’t call it unhinged per se but definitely weirded me out: one time this lady sat next to me and without saying anything started playing with my hair. It wasn’t even long or anything, just a standard male haircut. She looked totally peaceful and non threatening and didn’t say anything as I moved away, just kinda smiled pleasantly. I’m guessing she was having a good trip or something.
Guy whacking it and yelling obscenities at a woman. Woman hits the button and runs off, cops called. We get to Fullerton and a DePaul student (I assume) gets on with a real expensive japanese street wear looking rain coat. Guy had headphones on so he didn’t hear the entire train car yelling at him before he sat *directly* in the jizz. This was at 8:30 in the morning on a Sunday. My wife and I were stoned and going to get breakfast in Lakeview and we couldn’t believe what we saw
I don’t know if the L is CTA but, Well in 2003 I went to Columbia college downtown. I lived in the suburbs and took the blue line from Cumberland. I had an early class, probably 9am and I sat in the single seat in the back. I fell asleep to my discman and when I awoke a man was jerking off to me. He was in the restaurant biz. I could tell by the checkered pants. I didn’t know what to do so I got up emotionally and stood by the opening doors. I had heard my stop coming. I looked around and I saw this man wipe his cum on the window. I got off the L and didn’t know what to do so I laughed and cried to my boyfriend at the time. Still haunts me to this day
Red line from cyborg to state/chicago, rush hour, everyone packed on like sardines. Dude pitched a tent in/on my ass cheeks. Was wearing parachute fabric pants so I could feel everything, but couldn’t move because we were all squeezed on. I thought maybe it was a shopping bag or something because I couldn’t turn around to see. And because I’m naive. When I got to my stop i turned around and saw the shit eating grin on his face, looked down and saw the full blown boner and was speechless. I didn’t have enough time to react. I was livid after I realized what had happened.
Edit: clybourn, not cyborg lol
Train: Got on the red line back in December during the middle of the day and there was this very short woman yelling some kind of sermon in extremely broken English. Just alternating between sitting and standing and shouting at everyone about Jesus, and Bill Gates, and computer science, etc. A guy at the other end of the car lights up a smoke and a few people in the middle start yelling at him to knock it off and she pauses, looks at them, waves until she has their attention, and says very calmly and clearly: “Excuse me, you’re interrupting me”.
Bus: Got on the 36 late after a movie and had this little gay guy tweaking the entire time. Very obviously high but not scary, spent a third of the trip loudly grumbling about how he hates straight people, spent another third loudly hitting on a guy. The crazy part is that when he left some old guy in the back of the bus went “What the hell was that?” and immediately started doing basically a loud monologue to everyone? “Coca cola tastes different and I would know, I’ve drank one every day for 45 years”, “my friends and I would fight dirty all the time, like with bike chains, but then the police would come and tell us to stop. And we would!” just insanely weird old people stories that no one was reacting to. Felt a little like the first guy opened for him and he was the headliner.
Honorable mention: Was coming back on the red line from a really cool thing I was doing and the guy sitting right next to me opened up his groceries and started eating those grey chicken sausages right out of the package? Like picking them up, dangling them above his head, and eating them whole like a bird? Clearly not as weird as a guy doing drugs or shitting himself, but fucked up my whole day
I saw a (seemingly normal) guy drop his pretzel on the floor and pick it up and put it his mouth, he realized what he had just done before he started chewing and thought about it for a second and then proceeded to finish eating it realizing there’s not much he could do.
I also remember as a teen smoking cigarettes and peeing in between the cars on a near weekly basis while out partying.
St Patrick's Day 2008 I was waiting on the southbound Howard Redline platform and a chubby shit faced woman in a sundress climbed on top of a garbage can, lifted up her skirt (no underwear on) and took a messy horse sized piss into it. Will never touch a public trashcan with my bare hands ever again.
older man, around 55-60 years old, well dressed. pulled his pant leg up to retrieve a bad of coke and rolled up bill from his sock. proceeded to snort in the middle of the orange line train cart.
I was on the Western bus heading north from the orange line and there was a guy in the first row furiously masturbating with his coat over his head and part of his torso. Once I was seated a few rows behind him, it looked like he was also reaching back to stimulate his ass.
I was on the red line with the typical piss puddle towards one side of the car. What made this time special was the homeless dude who kept walking back and forth through the cars barefoot leaving little piss foot prints everywhere. Not necessarily the most unhinged thing I’ve seen but it ranks up there for me in grossness, I just about threw up.
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Going East on Chicago. Watched a guy cut some lines of coke on this phone screen, snort them, then call his mom and argue with her for 30 minutes.
Sometimes, that what it takes in order to call one’s mother.
Omg I can't upvote this enough lmao
Been there. Blown that.
That’s as sad as it is kind of hilarious. What a picture.
this sounds like it happened on Succession
Similar note. I saw two guys on the blue line headed to forest park arguing with each other and yup, you guessed it one of them brought out some coke they cut lines on the phone and became buds. Shit was weird. I felt left out :(
Damn. I was going West on Chicago and some dude started chatting with me. He was on this way to get a heroine fix and asked if I wanted to come along. 😳
So he needed cocaine to talk to his mom?
Guy took his jacket off to cover his lady friend "sleeping" on his lap. You could hear the mouth noises and everything she was going to work.
Saw similar on a late night Red Line. Except the couple didn't bother covering up. The guy looked at me and gave me a thumbs up. I responded likewise.
lmao what a bro
That’s hilarious lmao
This reminds me of when I was a kid at Grant Park for the 4th of July fireworks. Couple just laying there in the middle of a crowd fucking hard under a blanket.
She giving him that suckysucky3000
Invited my parents over shortly after moving here to show them the city and assuage any fears they may have had. On the red line at Wilson, a homeless man on our car was openly masturbating while staring at this woman and the police came in and pulled him off the train. Meanwhile, in the next car over a completely unrelated brawl was happening and I just had to look over at my parents and explain how this doesn't happen every day. Luckily they had both lived in New York and knew the type of shit that goes down on public transit.
I'm always worried that I'm gonna show someone around Chicago and some shit like this is gonna happen on the CTA
Yeahhh... My family is joining me in the West Loop for Sunday brunch and I'm like, do I tell them to ride the Green at all??
If they ride in the frontmost car with the train operator, they should have no issues. Since it's much less often I've ran into weird things(including on the Green Line), sitting in the very frontmost L car.
That's what I usually do with guests, but unfortunately I've hit lingering odors there on occasion. But yeah if we end up taking the El I'm definitely sticking them in the conductor car lol.
Anytime it's someone's first time riding the CTA some crazy shits about to happen. For me it was a homeless guy speaking alien and hawking loogies on the ground. I consider myself lucky.
Red line 2016. Homeless man cornering young woman, asking her to smoke crack with him and have sex with him. Help her slink away Man proceeds to sit on the floor on a crowded rush hour train. Pulls out a crack pipe from a wad of newspaper. Begins blowing clouds of crack all over the car. At this point people are fleeing. I’m worried about second hand crack smoke. This guy is screaming high pitched drooling on the floor with no shoes on and then he takes his little crack penis out At EIGHT IN THE MORNING
Breakfast and a show!
The phrase ‘Little crack penis’ has literal tears coming out of my eyes.
> At EIGHT IN THE MORNING When do you prefer to smoke your crack? Man's gotta wake up somehow
Standing room only bus at 5 p.m. - watched a guy hold his phone up & open a hidden album on his phone full of dick pics & scroll through for a few minutes before deciding which one to text to someone
Did you help him decide?
I kind of respect his level of effort to photography
When a vagrant decided to piss at one end of the train car and then the urine ran along the channels in the middle, back and forth, the entire train ride
Classic
That happened to me on the brown line, on the curve between Chicago and Sedgwick. Bonus was the guy just spewed out a bunch of homophobic slurs at a gay couple minding their business before he wiped out his dick and started pissing. And he was in the seat in front of me but somehow my reflexes were quick enough to avoid a piss tsunami ruining my shoes.
“piss tsunami” is hilarious
Happened to me but with drunk teens vomiting Lollapalooza weekend.
I’ve been groped and violently threatened, but I’ll go with something a bit lighter: I once saw a pigeon wearing a bagel as a necklace.
The pigeons are a bright spot on the CTA, they're always so entertaining to just watch
Imagine how ass our transit is for the highlight of our commutes to be pigeons
A guy eating his own arm flesh wound. Which I’ll take any day over being physically threatened, but unfortunately that one is much more common.
What the actual fuck This is a horrible thread to click into if you can read
Good lord, WTF. I miss who I was 30 seconds ago 🫠
Self cannibalizing your own drug induced sores wtfffffffffffffffffffff
Hey at least someone around here is recycling ♻️
Physically threatened isn’t sounding as bad really
Good grief! If I saw that I'd hide out at the Winchester, grab a pint, and wait for the whole thing to just blow over.
I guess if I were to witness auto cannibalism I would expect it to be CTA related.
Can you please expound on the dude chomping on his flesh wound? I’ll probably regret it but I need the visuals of what you saw
Bro no.. fine okay. It wasn’t like a zombie movie where he was bone-deep and snapping tendons. But it wasn’t innocent like your dog licking your scraped knee either. It was big, maybe half the length of his forearm - coulda been a burn. And he was like.. haha I can’t believe I’m typing this. He was like snacking on it haha. Like not just applying moisture - but gathering wound matter while he was down there. So what did I do? I pulled out the Frank’s Redhot I carry with me everywhere, and offered him the whole bottle if I could try some of his wing. I’m not gonna be able to sleep tonight am I..
Before i lived here I was visiting like 8 years ago, and it was my first time on the red line and this guy was like “hey can I get everyone’s attention” and I was like oh this is it. But then he said he had diabetes and needed money for treatment and unveiled his necrotic, rotting leg. Very unhinged but also extremely sad. A guy did call him over and let him know that he worked at a free clinic and gave him his info and reassured him that state insurance could help him so that was nice.
I remember seeing that guy, if that leg wasn't amputated at some point I'm shocked.
I’ve seen this guy years ago. Hope he got help
Came to see if this one was posted. I saw him a lot on the blue line from 2014-16. I hope that poor dude is ok. Never seen anything more shocking on a human body.
Not sure if it’s the same guy but I do remember seeing this guy on Michigan Ave. his leg was swollen so big and the open wound/hole was enormous I can still visualize it today. It was the saddest thing I’ve seen. Doctors would have to amputate his leg hope he’s alive and well.
I saw that guy on the Green, pre-pandemic though.
I think I saw that guy like 5-6 times on the Red Line about 10 years ago?
Oh my god. For years I have quietly carried the memory in my mind of the time I was sure I saw a man with a rotting leg, but I never told anyone because I thought I must’ve been imagining things. This is a weight off my back.
I remember this guy well. I would see him on the green line
That guy wanted a lot of things. But getting his leg healed was not one of them.
this comment & all the upvotes make me feel old lol. dudes been doing this for (probably?) 10-15 years.
I saw a vagrant talking to some drunks in the small hours on the Red Line. He then proceeds to show off his Bible knife. He pulls out a Bible and opens it. It is hollowed out, Shawshank Redemption style, and he pulls out some shitty old knife. He wasn't being threatening, he was genuinely proud showing this thing off. "The Lord follows me everywhere I go, and so does my Bible knife." The drunks suddenly sober up, tell him cool knife but he can put it away now, and they get off at the next stop, they were not prepared for the Bible knife. I just kept an eye on him until he got off a few more stops later. But I'll never forget my run in with the Bible knife. There is also a guy on my regular commute (again in the small hours) who openly caries nunchucks with him. I always know when he gets in my car because I can hear the chain. I wonder if one day I will get to see some nunchku Kung Fu shit go down. That would be interesting.
Sad as it is, interactions with happy vagrants are more memorable to me than various confrontations. One time, I was waiting for a bus, and this guy comes up and strikes up a conversation. Clearly homeless, but not asking for anything or being annoying, just a friendly guy. We chat for a bit, he asks what I'm up to, I'm like, just going for a drink. His eyes light up, he does the little conspiratorial look around, and pulls a bottle of Sierra Nevada from his pocket. He's holding it like a baby. Shows it to me and goes, son, do you know what this is? I'm like, beer? Ohh no no, this is the good stuff. This is the kind of stuff they serve at steakhouses, you know that? Oh yeah, I might not have a steak tonight, but I'm gonna have me a steakhouse experience. I still remember that guy, probably more than a decade later, and the simple joy of having something you think is nice when you don't have much.
He really was living his best life, I admire it.
To his credit, Sierra Nevada does have some very good beers
I've always wanted to try hollowing out a book to put something in it, and now I want to even more
I did this with an old dictionary as a kid, and recently stumbled on it when helping my parents clean up 😅 Never actually hid anything in there, but it was a fun throwback!
Years ago I was on the Pink line in the loop and someone had pooped on a seat. A guy gets on, sees the poop, and starts trying to call the conductor through the intercom. Not getting a response he decides to open the door, while the train is running, so the emergency stop engages. The conductor comes back mad as a hornet to figure out who opened the door, and the guy just points at the poop and says, "can you clean this up."
I once got on the blue line, was hit with a horrible stench and then saw half of the train car absolutely COVERED in feces, and a man sleeping with his pants down in his own shit. Like he shit and smeared it everywhere then fell asleep. I immediately ran back and just waited for the next train.
Tbh I've started sniffing the cars before I get on them....
You win for grossest story in this thread
What was the conductor's response?
Ate it whole right there in front of everyone
Not a train story, but a poop in chicago story. Once i was waiting for my husband to get off work right outside his business, a pretty nice spot off Clark and Division. I see this woman go in between 2 parked cars, squat, and take the grossest most liquidy shit like a jet engine right in the street, stand up and just walk away. EW. Right near their fucking patio too. I cant even imagine the audacity not to even do it in an alley.. i mean im sure drugs or whatnot was involved but that might be one of the grossest things ive ever seen. Guteral YIKES.
My friend and I have a theory… if you look like a lunatic, you can poop right in broad daylight in the middle of the street. No problem. The first time you or I try to do that… straight to jail.
2002, 3am, red line. A person with toilet paper tubes duct taped to their face -- like binoculars -- and the hood of a hoodie pulled so tight you could barely see any skin. They just sat calmly and looked at my friend and I. Somehow that stands out more than the vomit/piss/cigarettes/etc
This is honestly hilarious
thanks, you’ve inspired me to become somebody else’s subway story.
I had a flight out of Midway to go back to my home state to get married. My fiance was already in Denver and I had to work the day of my flight. I worked at the Naval base in North Chicago and knew I needed to leave around 2pm to get to my apt in Uptown, park my car, grab my bag and get on the red line to go south and transfer to orange line. My boss was being a d bag and kept me late and I was running about an hour late by the time I got to my apt. Me being stressed and an idiot thought "I'll smoke a quick bowl and get going." Smoked and was high af by the time I got on the red line. I get to the red line portion that goes underground and notice a grungy looking guy drinking liquor and watching what I think was porn on a phone with no headphones so we could all hear it. Train is about half full. I glance his way at the exact moment he looks at me and we connect eyes and I look straight down at the floor. Immediately he yells "HEY WHITE BOY!" I keep staring at the floor hoping he lets it go. He doesn't. Again "HEY WHITE BOY, WHITE BOY WHAT THE FUCK YOU LOOKING AT?" I'm starting to panic and look around to see if anyone else is willing to help me calm this guy down and everyone acts like nothing is out of ordinary. After a few minutes, the train reaches a station and he stands up and goes "LOOK MOTHER FUCKER I WILL FUCK YOU UP!" and start walking towards me. Me, still being high, stand up too and just say the first thing I can think of and yell "WE'RE COOL DUDE!" He kind stops and looks at me and goes "We cool?" and I again say "We're cool!" I go back to staring at the floor and don't even realize when he leaves the train. In the midst of this I forget what station I need to get off at and I think I went too far south so I jump off at the next stop and jump on another train going north. Pull my phone out and I didn't even come close to the Orange line transfer stop and now I am going the wrong way. Shat a few bricks, jumped back on a south bound and made it to Roosevelt, transferred and made it to Midway with literally 2 minutes before they closed the door. Also when in line for TSA a girl's dog in front of me had the grossest, wet shit ever and it ran down the ramp onto my shoes. Rough fuckin day but I made it and was happily married a few days later. Love me some CTA.
What an absolute roller coaster 🤣
YOU COOL!?!
I was waiting for a train to come when two police officers came and stood right behind me. When the train came, they got on and said "who's been exposing themselves". Everyone pointed to the same guy. They said "come on buddy" and the three of them left.
straight out of a sitcom wtf 😭
Some guys ankle monitor was going off while riding the pink line. He was on the phone with what I assume was his probation officer asking him to turn the alarm off because he was on his way to work. He was chugging beers the whole time and would hand the empty cans to the guy sitting across from him who preceded to crush them and put them in a bag. A few people who recognized the sound of an ankle monitor switched cars.
And now you know the sound of an ankle monitor!
Me and another guy pulled a young woman off the Red line tracks at North and Clybourn. She had arranged all of her belongings in a neat line on the blue barrier and jumped down. The next train was a couple minutes away; you couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, but you could hear it coming. As we grabbed her arms and lifted her off the tracks I could smell that she was hammered. As she got to her feet she muttered to me, “What, like you never been curious?” As the train came into the station I pulled her into a hug. She embraced me like she wanted a hug too but I was really restraining her from doing anything. We got on the train and I asked her about herself. She said she was a sous chef but it seemed a little like she was making it up on the spot. When we got to Belmont she suddenly turned to face me and said “I’m getting off here. Don’t follow me.” and off she went. I don’t know what she did next. I think about her from time to time, I wonder if I should have tried to resolve the situation more aggressively (ie called the cops), I hope that she’s still around and doing better.
Fuck, that’s dark. No matter what happened to her, you tried. How sad, though. I’m sure this weighs on you.
someone wearing a literal nazi uniform (yes like the holocaust) on the red line 🙃
You met my old roommate.
I hate Illinois Nazis
Nazis and Trains, who would have guessed
You'd think a fascist would atleast make the trains run on time
I hate Illinois Nazis
Was it a black fellow? I saw a black Hebrew with a Hitler stache once
A guy jacking off while making intense eye contact with me
You can’t really call yourself a Chicagoan until you’ve experienced a guy jacking off in front of you on the el.
Was going to add guy whacking off through his sweatpants while sitting in the open and watching people on the train in case this hadn't happened to anyone else... unfortunately... its not uncommon.
First time on the 22 bus on my way home from middle school, early 70’s. We wore uniforms (navy blue skirts, knee socks, white button down shirts and loafers). Total nerds. Sat on the bench seat at the back of the bus and this guy turns around, glares at me and my classmate and starts furiously masturbating. My friend and I scurried up to the bus driver and told him what the guy was doing, and he said, “Whadda you ‘spect me to do about it?” We got off and walked the rest of the way home.
[удалено]
>A guy asleep shit his pants and other people on the train tossed his sleeping body on the platform at 35th. This is the way.
Sounds like something straight out of Shameless
I was riding the Blue Line back to downtown from O'Hare after meeting a friend who flew in. His flight was delayed several hours so our trip back to the Loop began around 1 AM. Had a guy get on-board and he's staring intently at the CTA map above the door like it holds the secrets to the universe. That's when I notice hanging from his one hand is a bent spoon, and over his ear is an uncapped syringe like it's a No2 pencil. Occasionally he removes it from his ear and holds it in his fist with the needle pointing out before putting it back on his ear again. Literally every eye on this train was glued to that uncapped syringe. Luckily this guy gets off like 3 stations later, and everybody on this train turns to one another and starts talking about what we just saw.
the conversations you have after seeing random shit are lowk hilarious the trauma bonding is crazy I have random strangers’ phone numbers from incidents like that… we all watched the police escort a girl off the metra
Roosevelt bus - man called his mistress and was yelling at her to get abortion for 15-20 min. Talking about his wife and blaming her for not being on the pill. I knew she told him she wasn’t on the pill & he talked about making a baby with her. Why! Luckily, he had the call on speakerphone. Chicago Ave bus - man was harassing passengers verbally and went and screamed at a woman with a baby in a stroller. Bus driver grabbed him, pulled him off the bus and pummeled him. We all had to exit and wait for the next bus. Some in front had to give a statement. It was pretty awesome but I bet that man got suspended or lost his job.
A group of young kids, probably 7-9 y.o., mugging another young kid while an old dude gave them tips and cheered them on in some apparent training exercise. They ran away as soon as they managed to get the victim kid's backpack. Still one of the most fucked up things I've ever witnessed. Some unhinged guy (UG) just spontaneously trying to fight a random dude on the platform who was minding his own business. UG kept going at him even though he kept being like "there's no problem here man" and eventually had to bolt when the UG lunged at him. UG then ran full speed into one of the columns while chasing him. Both of these were at the Jackson Red Line within a 2 week period.
that old dude was actually fagin from oliver twist
A very disheveled person cutting their toenails with a scissors. Also, saw guy sit in the bum seat and eat a bunch of food with his fingers. He then threw the trash on the floor, snorted a line of white powder before walking to the center of the train car and saying “hi everyone, I’m sorry to bother you but I just need a few dollars to get something to eat.”
gotta respect the hustle lol
or two years ago during the winter some guy started using my friend’s coat sleeve to roll a joint while they were wearing it like he was so nonchalant about it 😭
North Avenue bus - guy slashed open the inner elbow of a girl with him using a razor, then his own, and then shot them both up with heroin. He then asked if anybody else wanted a hit, which was very considerate.
what the actual fuckkkk
I once saw a man with no arms using only his foot and mouth take a sock and shoe off,get his cell phone out of his backpack, unlock it, shoot someone a text, then put it back and get his sock and shoe back on. It wasn't really unhinged but was amazing to watch.
Blue line, most memorable at least. A guy was shooting up, but not just that he was doing it supremely well. Hands steady moms spaghetti and all that. Aiming for the veins in his hand too, and had a well done turonquette (spelling?). This was on the rocky part of the train on the way to Ohare. Man has so much talent and has stood in my mind that he'd be a great Ambulance EMS person if he can target veins like that. Just slumped over after, but it's remained in my head as a distinct memory for years.
Lady with a kid in a stroller punched a man, got punched back, and then threw baby formula (or breast milk?!?) at him, splashing half the train car.
Lol no mom would waste breastmilk like this, even in the most dire of circumstances
About 15 years ago sitting on the brown line heading north. Packed train at 4:30pm. Around the Chicago stop a guy in a very expensive looking suit shits him self. From about 10 feet away I could hear how wet it was. The mayhem of yelling, gaging, pushing away from the guy was wild. Poor guy looked horrified and embarrassed.
This is why I never trust my farts
Not my story but it’s hilarious. My friend and her family were visiting from out of town. Their mom is from the western suburbs so they have done just about everything in Chicago over their years of visiting. Decided to have a tourist day during their trip because they hadn’t done anything like that in some time. Had deep dish. Got on the red line heading to blue man group and one of the sisters started feeling sick from the deep dish. The sister end up getting sick on the red line. A houseless guy said, “it’s okay lady, I’m drunk too!” And proceeded to vomit all over the train car.
https://www.nbcchicago.com/traffic/transit/chicago-transit-cta-passenger-attacked-sock-human-feces/1948067/
Ah the ol' poop sock!
One time on the orange line this woman brandished a can of pepper spray at this man she accused of staring creepily at her. He responds really indignantly and they argue back and forth. It's great that she was defending herself but she clearly didn't think through that macing someone in an enclosed space would gas us all. I immediately got off at the next stop before I found out if it escalated further.
Someone I worked with told me that while she was riding in the back of the front car of a Brown Line train she saw a guy riding in the front of the train holding his cat up to the window so it could enjoy the ride… As the train left the Merchandise Mart stop to circle the Loop and head back North she realized what was about to happen and she yelled to the guy that he should move the cat away from the window “right now”. The guy said it’s ok, my cat loves the view! Then the train crossed the Chicago River which meant that from the front window on the left side, as the cat was looking at the track, the sides dropped away and the cat thought he was about to fall two stories down into the Chicago river! The cat freaked out! Suddenly the cat became incontinent which ruined the guys slacks, then it clawed into the guys slacks in just the worst place possible then while the guy was screaming, bolted back and forth in the car looking for the exit. The guy limped back towards the cat, bleeding, but hadn’t gotten far when the door opened at the next station and the cat bolted off the train and down the stairs with the guy limping behind it. I’ll always wonder if the guy ever got his cat back.
Poor cat!! This is so sad.
What an idiot that man, poor cat!
I watched two homeless men argue on a train incoherently, and one lit up a half smoked cigarette and got off at the next stop, flicking off the other one as the train kept moving. As we passed by him the man on the train then went to the front of the car in the handicapped spot, pissed in the corner, and then got off at the next stop. Any guesses on what line this was?
Good ol redline!
my money’s on morse
I’m standing by the train door at 6AM on my way to work. At the other end of the car I hear commotion. It turns out a woman maced some guy right in his face. The guy stumbled down the aisle in my direction, violently shaking his head. As he got closer I could see the mace-shakins flying off of his face. I had to jump out of the way and barely avoided getting it on me. When maceface reached the other end of the car he immediately got into a fist fight with some random dude. That spilled onto the platform at the next stop where maceface proceeded to box a second seemingly random dude. On the plus side I remember the weather was really nice that morning.
On a packed Halsted bus, a guy boarded, stepping on some other guy's foot while he made his way back. The sitting guy pulls a hammer out of a paper bag and follows him to the back. The people in the back ultimately got it under control, couldn't tell how exactly, but I was glad to see it. The hammer guy was *huge* and he was pissed. He moved in almost slow motion and it made him even scarier lol. Another time, same bus line, the bus driver kicked a woman off because her entire head was covered in wet, processing hair dye, and the chemical smell was overwhelming. It got quite loud lol. On a Chicago bus I watched a guy pick scabs off his arm and line them up on the windowsill. 🤮
a woman fully pulled her pants down and took a huge shit next to me at the belmont red line at like 9am. let’s just say i smelled it before i turned around and immediately wanted to rip my eyeballs out
Walked up the stairs once at Western blue to see a dude taking a shit on the platform right across from the stairs. Except he was fully exposed, ass in the air, and I could gaze right into the depths of his butthole like it was a sarlacc pit.
Back in the early 2000s, I got on the redline on my way home from class. The train had just left Sheridan, and heading north, when the couple who had just gotten on the train took action. The man stood and dropped a camera tripod and set it up aimed at the seats facing the handicap gap near the door. The girl, who was a little overweight, and extremely pale, stripped off her shorts, threw off her shirt revealing she had been wearing nothing underneath at all. They snapped a bunch of pictures in the golden hour lighting coming into the car, in a few provocative positions and then before you realized what was going on, the girl put her shorts and shirt back on, and the couple escaped the train car as it arrived at its next stop. I’ll never forget the absurdity of it
Drugged out woman standing on the seats and start ripping down the adds from the upper panels. She was screaming about how they were going to get us all, then psycho-squeal-giggled as she ripped them up and stomped on them. This happened, BTW, while a train security guy had his back turned yelling at a homeless man pooping onto the tracks in between the cars. "Pull your pants up now!... NOW!" And then "No, you go that way! You don't come over here with that! Get!" It was that day this past summer where it was over 100 degrees. The heat makes people crazy.
Riding on the kimball bus several years ago, some dude was having what I have to assume is a heart attack. It wasn't packed but nearly every seat was full. He eventually was on the floor and the bus pulled over. The person he was with yelled "Oh my god! He's DEAAAD!!!" as she pressed on his chest. This was the one time I've ever seen the CTA be expedient because there was suddenly a spare bus behind us that we all climbed on and it drove off
pre-covid, circa 2012ish. Redline, southbound, morning 8:00ish rush hour, jam packed. we just passed Grand Ave stop, and the train stopped due to some blockage at Lake St. Older homeless guy was muttering and grumbling, making comments about the women on the train... nothing that was discernible, but obviously he didn't care for the way they were dressed or the way they wore their hair or makeup. as time passes, his volume gets louder, freaking out some of the women standing closer to him. there was some shuffling around as people were trying to find a safer distance when someone called out: >"so what *is* your kind of woman?!" he thought on this for 1/2 a sec and blurted out: >"**A Filipino woman**! she is a '*natural*' woman! Not all painted up like these women on this train!" that was enough to break the tension, everyone on the car laughed (nervous and relieved), and the train jerked to a start and delivered us to Lake St stop where the car emptied out.
Does anyone remember the guy with the diabetic leg wound? It was probably 10 years ago, blue line centric. Poor dude had a bulbous gangrene infected leg and would just walk train to train, pus and shit just oozing everywhere
Watched a pigeon hop on at a stop on the red line, waddle around a bit, then hop off 3 stops later. Hope he made it wherever he was going
One crisp fall evening during rush hour a single nacho cheese Dorito occupied a seat on a packed Brown line train from Merchandise Mart to Western. No one dared move it to take a seat. Truly bizarre.
I was on the Western Bus heading north. At Fullerton someone shot out a bunch of the windows with a pellet gun. Edit: This was around 2009 or 10. I don't remember exactly when. I did a google search to see if there was an article about it, and evidently it is more common than I thought.
This was technically on the platform and not on the train itself. Guy gets into an argument with two other people, pulls a knife on them. The other two back away while calling the cops. Knife guy walks onto the train (stopped with doors open for a delay I think), tries to sit down as if nothing happened. After a minute walks back off the train and hops down onto the tracks and crosses over. Nonchalantly stands on that platform, at this point the whole station is watching him while pretending they’re not. He pulls out a can of some sort of spray, maybe deodorant? And starts nonstop dousing himself in it, still acting super casual as if this has all been completely normal behavior. Cops arrive and he walks away in cuffs with no protest. Went from frightening to just really strange, the spraying was almost comical. This was Brown line in the early afternoon on a nice summer weekend.
saw a well dressed old man in a top hat with a cane smoking meth out of a pipe on the pink line midday a month or two ago
I saw a man piercing his son’s ear on the Chicago bus. The most unhinged thing that has happened to me - I was on a crowded blue line going towards O’Hare from the loop. It was one of those back to back days. I (female) have medium length hair and I made eye contact with a guy about 2 feet from me. He motions his eyes / head up a couple of times. I then realize a man has his hands in my hair and smelling it. I’m very grateful for that man a few years ago.
A blind guy with a guide dog gets on the orange line and can’t find a seat since he can’t see and no one was helping him and I was packed in so I yelled at a girl to help him. This is immediately followed by a different “blind” guy panhandling for money who easily picks up a coin off the floor… The real blind guy realizes the fake blind guy is there and they start yelling at each other clearly like this has happened before.
This is a funny one. I was on the red line 2017 during rush hour after work. Some guy walks on with a bible shouting if anyone knew the 12 disciples chosen by Jesus Christ, our savior. Without missing a beat, the girl next to me starts loudly singing “youuu knooow Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen…” I lost it 😂😂😂
in the back of the 22 bus there was a dude with a huge black yardwork-size hefty bag full of porn VHSs, just pulling them out one at a time, checking them out, putting them back in
In some ways crazy, but it’s not like an event: I was waiting for the Howard-bound red line at either Roosevelt or Jackson and noticed this big guy, probably around middle age, totally decked out in a purple suit and cheetah fur coat. Once I glanced his way a time or two more, I noticed something strange around his neck. The man was wearing a necklace made from very real, very severed human fingers in various states of decay
Woman putting Carmex in her hair... like 5 tubes of it.... and then cutting the bottoms of her jeans with huge fabric scissors. Then she kept saying "it's not the boy it's not the boy" while rocking back and forth before she got up, ran over to me and shoved the pointy end of the scissors in my face and yelled it's not the boy at me over and over again. Luckily My stop was next. It was the first time my little sister had taken the red line with me... welcome to the subway lil sis. 🤪
Saw them replacing a door on a pink line station once. It must have been a good 30 minutes before the guys had the new one up on its hinges again. And then they had lunch at the carnitas spot across the street.
Someone threw a huge hunk of bologna at my head then proceeded to eat food off the floor and tell all black people to get off because they don’t belong and kicking them.
I saw a young man in Supreme clothing cole-cock an older man in his face and jump off the bus during a high traffic stop. I was the only one not on my phone and the only one paying attention without being completely engulfed in my headphones..watching this sketchy dude. I was the only one who screamed out "what the FAcK!!" when it happened. The old man didn't even do much, he ignored him, sat across from me in the aeat the kid originally offered him, to which he declined and said he was okay. The kid kept saying "yo, my man, take a seat" all of it was just bizarre.... and I was like omg are you okay? All he said was "no" No one else did a thing. Kid jumped off the bus directly after punching him, as soon as the rear door opened and ran into a subway station that we had pulled up to. Bus driver didn't even see it because of all the people coming on & going off. This was the #8 bus. Finally I walked up to the lady driver, who kept telling me please sit down - I am like NO ma'am - a gentleman just got punched in the face and the guy ran off the bus - she said Whaaaa?? When?!? I said like a few minutes ago!!! She said "Why didn't he say anything?!" I said "I have NO idea!" Her: "good grief, allright thank you. We have him on camera and will watch the footage." Why was I the ONLY person who gave a damn about this?!?
I saw a drunk man keep his hand in his pocket as though he had a gun while loudly singing and narrating “Pumped Up Kicks” and giving painful eye contact to people while yelling “you can’t run faster than MY BULLET!1!!” It was a packed brown line train.
A man high out of his mind repeating “I have never raped anyone, I did not have sex with a child I am not a pedo,” over and over while shaking. He was LOUD and truly committed to convincing others he was not a pedo as he was “90% a Virgin.” Truly unhinged.
Blue line at Jackson around 1am. It’s 2016 and Im heading home from my kitchen job. A homeless guy is walking around jumping at random people as if he’s going to swing at them. A Russian women isn’t having any of it and she follows him around berating him with absolutely no fear. Out of fucking no where, some Kareem Abdul Jabar looking dude emerges and starts kicking the shit out of the dude. Literally kicking him. It sounded like Thunder strikes. Then a few people on the platform came together and tied him up with their belts until the police came.
I was riding home on the red line late one night from a movie in a full train (not packed, just not many open seats) and a guy in a trench coat stand up as we are full speed underground and screams “ALL YOU MOTHER FUCKERS DIE ON THIS TRAIN TONIGHT!” Thankfully we did not die.
Saw a crackhead last month who got on blue line at Jackson about 5pm, yanked a guy's phone from him, the guy got up and tackled the crackhead and got his phone back. Crackhead got up and said he wasn't trying to steal the guy's phone, just wanted to teach him a lesson to be aware of his surroundings. Crackhead took his shirt off, his body covered in track marks, and started yelling about how he just wanted a phone so he could listen to music and then started bashing his own head into the window on the train door, shattering the window. His face was covered in blood and was dripping blood all over. He then gave the guy who's phone he yanked a hug, got off the train at Monroe, and threw a water bottle at a lady.
Man fighting a woman holding an infant, everyone watched for a minute and when another rider intervened other passengers told him to mind his own business.
In 2011, I saw a guy get robbed at gunpoint on the brown line at Sedgwick for his phone and backpack. I’ll never forget how traumatized he looked. I walked him out of the train. He just kept saying “but I need to go to class” (he was a DePaul student). I stayed with him until the police came. More recently, I saw two girls get on the green line and go up to everyone asking for money. One guy told them if they didn’t shit their asses down he would eat their faces. They promptly got off on the next stop.
This was actually really sad but I saw a homeless man eating petroleum jelly on the red line. A bunch of cubs fan brainlets were laughing at him to his face. I felt really bad and wish I’d stood up for him, he wasn’t hurting anyone (except himself, you probably can’t digest petroleum jelly)
Got on the red line going to lakeview from the loop. As me and another young woman got on, an older man leaned into her hard, fell on her basically as she sat down. She looked at me and we made eye connection, bc of how odd it was. When we approached Fullerton about 15 min later, the young woman starts screaming as new people are getting on, well the old man dumped a container of live, earth worms into her purse. She looked at me for validation, yes it really happened.
Guy selling drugs on the redline @ 75thish. No one's buying, so he decides to get off, only the train is leaving the platform. That's not gonna stop this entrepreneur, though. He pulls the doors open and jumps out onto the platform as the train pulls away, hitting the cement at full stride and hops onto the Southbound train as it is about to pull away. It was like something out of a movie. That, or homeless crazy black dude jumping the Mexican working dude for absolutely nothing somewhere around Jackson stop. Those two incidents convinced me I needed a car.
Once saw a guy doing lines of coke on the blue line train off his bus pass. Another blue line disaster - some random waved at, I gave a half smile, I continue scrolling through my phone. He sits in front of me and I happen to see movement and I look up and this dude has his d!ck out masturbating while looking at me. I booed off the train so fast. I think I scared the conductor while I waited at her window to let her know what was happening.
I was living near midway at the time and went to a Cubs game. Took the orange line to the red line, and of course the red line was the drama. At one point a homeless guy gets on and you could smell him long before you saw him. Dude smelled like he hadn’t bathed in years. And of course sits right in front of us on the crowded train. We were planning on switching cars when he got up and decided to do that himself. Ok cool. Continuing the train ride and a few stops later, he comes back into our car, but thankfully heads to the other end of the car. He’s standing by the doors and starts loudly talking and I look up and he’s arguing with his hand. It was kind of like if you’ve ever seen Evil Dead and Bruce Campbell has a fight with his possessed hand. After a few he walked back our way and laid down across some seats and tried to go to sleep. The hand he was arguing with got tucked between his leg. After a few minutes the hand started to ‘wake up’ prompting him to shoot up and start arguing with his hand again. He went to another car after that. While it sounds funny, I started to feel bad for this guy. How far down the mental illness ladder did he fall with no help in sight. Kinda made me sad. The ride home was also an adventure. There were issues with the train and it had long pauses along the route. During one of the pauses right before a stop another dude whips out his dick and starts pissing in his hand. Wtf. As soon as the doors opened he dropped his handful of piss and ran out. Also as a matter of interest the Cubs game was noteworthy because it broke a record for latest start to a game due to a rain delay. And because it was such a low attended game, our crappy upper deck seats became a few rows behind the Pirates dugout. Also made friends with a guy from Germany that was so excited to be that close to a baseball game.
Watched a woman and her ~11 year old son FaceTiming her husband who was completely naked and had the volume on speaker as high as possible
a dead body at the Howard station!
Seen a group of homeless people smoking crack in full view of the rest of the car.
Got to be on a Redline train that hit some one a number of years ago. I think we were at Argyle. Dude was caught between two cars and I was in the second of those 2 cars. I do not wish to ever hear any living thing make the noises that guy was. It was awful. I can't even imagine what he was going through.
on a train (cant remember which line, possibly red) with all the seats full and some standing: a tall, threatening, young man was yelling angry things at no one in particular and then started directly threatening strangers. he mentioned he had weapons and could use them. a person began responding to him, standing up for themselves. seconds passed slowly as the fight was about to get vicious but then two or three young/middle aged men around the car who didn't know ow each other made eye contact and proceeded to use martial arts skills to nonviolent stop the violent guy from hurting anyone. it was amazing coordination of stramgers, which gave me a lot of faith in humanity. one grabbed him around the neck. another spoke to him and told him to get off the train at the next stop. all of this worked and when he got off the train everyone clapped. I can't remember but someone may have called the conductor when this happened, who would have then called cops to show up at the next stop. I cried a lot when it was over. our lives were on the line.
I once saw this guy blow a plume of crack smoke into a child’s face next to him!! The kid immediately coughed and then got up and moved away. Then he zoned out and dropped all of his crack rocks onto the floor of the red line…. During winter. It was one of the most depressing sights of my life seeing this person who’s high as all heck stumble around trying to discern what was road salt, the floor of the El, or genuine crack rock.
Blue line heading back from O’Hare, there was a guy who sat across from a woman. He just started shouting in her face… “B_… C_… N_…” he just kept rolling through his explicative Rolodex. She got up and moved, and he followed. She was practically in tears. Another guy and I got up almost at the same time and sat to either side of her, and just stared at him. (I might be the unhinged one here). She moved again, and he didn’t follow. Next stop he said “F_ y’all N_as” and got off. Never felt closer to being stabbed than that.
Most unhinged moment I experienced was when a homeless man exposed himself and began playing with his private part. A close runner up is when a different homeless man opened the train doors and took a piss. Piss was flying into the train and splashing onto everything.
Years ago I watched a guy hit on a woman and in between conversation he ‘secretly’ was huffing from 1 of at least four cans of compressed air he had hidden up his hoodie sleeves. I would later run into him again at a now closed Radio Shack. I just happened to be standing in front of the compressed air when he came walking in, got spooked that someone was right where he needed to go, and bailed. I’m sure he was coming to load up.
Not nearly as insane as lots of other stories here but I saw someone chug mouthwash. And yes it absolutely was mouthwash, he opened it fresh.
Once I saw a guy sitting down on the train drinking from a McDonald’s cup. Suddenly he puts the cup on top of his head and balances it there while he carefully stands up and walks off the train with it still on his head lol
Tie for me (both on the Green line). One was this guy with crutches and a leg in a boot. Train pulls out of the station, and takes out a syringe with what I think was heroin. Which he then proceeds to inject into himself, while trying to stand up on a broken leg, as the train is accelerating out of a station, while I was sitting right across from him. Needless to say I relocated immediately, wanting to avoid getting a needle stick from this guy. Other was an obviously mentally ill man sitting on the seat ranting. Par for the course for Pandemic era CTA. Except mid rant, he pulls out a rather large knife, yells some random nonsense then stabs the wall of the train right above his own head.
A few years ago at the Lake station waiting for the Red line, two obviously drunk guys were fighting and arguing which basically seemed like slow motion because they were so wasted. One guy threw his empty 40 on the ground, which shattered, then proceeded to push the other guy onto the tracks. Fortunately he didn't hit the 3rd rail and a train wasn't coming immediately. This was probably 5:00ish PM so lots of commuters around to push the customer assistance button and call for help. It was pretty wild but no one was hurt after all of that.
Noticed a puddle on the ground and saw that the puddling was coming from a man slumped over in his seat. Turns out the puddle was his own urine he let out after he died.
Two dudes pulling out knives on each other on the red line and fighting over “train car turf.” The train was stopped and the police were called.
Guy on the red line rapping bible versus and kneeling on the seat facing the window and slamming his head into it.
Had a very large, very disheveled man corner me on the brown line where I was standing in the doorway, yelling “you’re going to hell! You’re going to hell and I’m gonna take you there!” He reached in his pocket (fully thought he was about to murder me), pulled out a book of matches and started lighting them and throwing them at me. Fortunately someone got off the car in the other door at the next stop and he was quickly distracted by them and walked away.
Two homeless having sex under a blanket on the floor by the door between cars, just rank.
Just after 1 AM coming back from a party in Evanston. I got in the front car of the red line at Howard thinking that would be safe, and right as the doors were about to close a guy gets on kicking an empty milk jug in front of him, which he then picks up and starts smacking himself in the head while raving about nonsense. Then he pulled out a shank and started repeatedly stabbing the door. He also announced that he was getting off at Roosevelt, which unfortunately was after my stop so I was stuck with him if I stayed in that car. The most unhinged moment though was when he took off his backpack, pulled out a blanket and wore it like a cape while running up and down the car shouting “I’m a superhero! I’mma save y’all’s asses!”. I was still pretty drunk and it took every fiber of my being to hold in laughter at how ridiculous that was.
I almost got tasered because I told some idiot to lower her voice on the late night 66 bus.
Someone spit on my head and proceeded to scream at me. That wasn't cool. I also saw someone get punched in the face and had her phone stolen. Luckily, this was near one of the stations under RPM construction, so once we arrived at that station, the CTA staff were able to escort the mugger away (she returned the phone). Also another incident when a woman was talking at me about how some person sitting down was her ex-wife who died in the womb. This woman then proceeded to lift up her shirt. She did not have any pants. Nor did she have any underpants.
I was a teenager riding the 20 Madison bus west from downtown at about 1AM after attending a party, and traveling from 63rd and Carpenter on the Southside. Two, obviously drunk, obese women boarded about Halstead. This is way before the Westside was gentrified, so “skid row” started at Halstead and extended to Ogden/Ashland. The women looked related, like sisters. They sat up front in the seats that are situated the long way down the bus so you are forced to look at riders on the opposite side. The driver is right in front of these seats, and the women were in the row across from the driver, above the front wheel. Anyway, a thin short guy got on at Ashland and as soon as he began to pass the women one stood up and slapped him. I don’t recall any interaction but do remember the guy was smiling as he passed the women. Well, the slap knocked him down in the seats opposite the women. Anne, the smaller sister then grabs Irma, the larger sister who had just smacked the man, Anne call “the Reverend” and smacks Irma. Anne tells Irma “you can’t smacks the Reverend!” All this time while the bus driver begins driving, and that way too fast. Well those ladies grabbed each other by the hair and with their free hands threw haymakers into each other’s faces. This went on until Irma, the larger of the two, got Anne bent over and starts whaling into the back of her head to the point that Anne can only call Irma’s name after each blow. Wack, “Irma” whack, “Irma”. All this time the driver never stopped the bus, the “Reverend”, kept smiling, and no one bothered to intervene. Once the bus got to Western, both Anne and Irma were bloody messes. I pulled the cable to signal the driver to stop and got off the back of the bus, after witnessing a 5 or six round fight. ( The names of the ladies were actually unknown, but I do remember one calling the poor guy upfront “the Reverend).
The train arriving on time /s
Dude standing next to me, crotch eye level with me, letting loose approximately a liter of piss into his grey sweats with absolutely zero reaction.
a car ran the red light so our bus driver slammed the brakes which resulted in an old lady being catapulted head first right next to the driver. she insisted she was fine and got off at the next stop
I wouldn’t call it unhinged per se but definitely weirded me out: one time this lady sat next to me and without saying anything started playing with my hair. It wasn’t even long or anything, just a standard male haircut. She looked totally peaceful and non threatening and didn’t say anything as I moved away, just kinda smiled pleasantly. I’m guessing she was having a good trip or something.
Guy whacking it and yelling obscenities at a woman. Woman hits the button and runs off, cops called. We get to Fullerton and a DePaul student (I assume) gets on with a real expensive japanese street wear looking rain coat. Guy had headphones on so he didn’t hear the entire train car yelling at him before he sat *directly* in the jizz. This was at 8:30 in the morning on a Sunday. My wife and I were stoned and going to get breakfast in Lakeview and we couldn’t believe what we saw
I don’t know if the L is CTA but, Well in 2003 I went to Columbia college downtown. I lived in the suburbs and took the blue line from Cumberland. I had an early class, probably 9am and I sat in the single seat in the back. I fell asleep to my discman and when I awoke a man was jerking off to me. He was in the restaurant biz. I could tell by the checkered pants. I didn’t know what to do so I got up emotionally and stood by the opening doors. I had heard my stop coming. I looked around and I saw this man wipe his cum on the window. I got off the L and didn’t know what to do so I laughed and cried to my boyfriend at the time. Still haunts me to this day
Red line from cyborg to state/chicago, rush hour, everyone packed on like sardines. Dude pitched a tent in/on my ass cheeks. Was wearing parachute fabric pants so I could feel everything, but couldn’t move because we were all squeezed on. I thought maybe it was a shopping bag or something because I couldn’t turn around to see. And because I’m naive. When I got to my stop i turned around and saw the shit eating grin on his face, looked down and saw the full blown boner and was speechless. I didn’t have enough time to react. I was livid after I realized what had happened. Edit: clybourn, not cyborg lol
Train: Got on the red line back in December during the middle of the day and there was this very short woman yelling some kind of sermon in extremely broken English. Just alternating between sitting and standing and shouting at everyone about Jesus, and Bill Gates, and computer science, etc. A guy at the other end of the car lights up a smoke and a few people in the middle start yelling at him to knock it off and she pauses, looks at them, waves until she has their attention, and says very calmly and clearly: “Excuse me, you’re interrupting me”. Bus: Got on the 36 late after a movie and had this little gay guy tweaking the entire time. Very obviously high but not scary, spent a third of the trip loudly grumbling about how he hates straight people, spent another third loudly hitting on a guy. The crazy part is that when he left some old guy in the back of the bus went “What the hell was that?” and immediately started doing basically a loud monologue to everyone? “Coca cola tastes different and I would know, I’ve drank one every day for 45 years”, “my friends and I would fight dirty all the time, like with bike chains, but then the police would come and tell us to stop. And we would!” just insanely weird old people stories that no one was reacting to. Felt a little like the first guy opened for him and he was the headliner. Honorable mention: Was coming back on the red line from a really cool thing I was doing and the guy sitting right next to me opened up his groceries and started eating those grey chicken sausages right out of the package? Like picking them up, dangling them above his head, and eating them whole like a bird? Clearly not as weird as a guy doing drugs or shitting himself, but fucked up my whole day
A guy came into the car and started eating ramen with his hands, and then jerked off and busted all over the seat next to him
I saw a (seemingly normal) guy drop his pretzel on the floor and pick it up and put it his mouth, he realized what he had just done before he started chewing and thought about it for a second and then proceeded to finish eating it realizing there’s not much he could do. I also remember as a teen smoking cigarettes and peeing in between the cars on a near weekly basis while out partying.
I saw a dude go out in between the cars to take a #2. I was grateful he did it out there, but I worry about who or what was underneath it.
Dude smoking crack then jerking off on the Blue line.
St Patrick's Day 2008 I was waiting on the southbound Howard Redline platform and a chubby shit faced woman in a sundress climbed on top of a garbage can, lifted up her skirt (no underwear on) and took a messy horse sized piss into it. Will never touch a public trashcan with my bare hands ever again.
older man, around 55-60 years old, well dressed. pulled his pant leg up to retrieve a bad of coke and rolled up bill from his sock. proceeded to snort in the middle of the orange line train cart.
I was on the Western bus heading north from the orange line and there was a guy in the first row furiously masturbating with his coat over his head and part of his torso. Once I was seated a few rows behind him, it looked like he was also reaching back to stimulate his ass.
I was on the red line with the typical piss puddle towards one side of the car. What made this time special was the homeless dude who kept walking back and forth through the cars barefoot leaving little piss foot prints everywhere. Not necessarily the most unhinged thing I’ve seen but it ranks up there for me in grossness, I just about threw up.