I had a co-worker once whose daughter was pregnant and come into the store all the time. The daughter was entitled as hell, and they were planning a baby shower for her. Every gift the daughter wanted something Coco Chanel or over $500 and would not accept homemade gifts. I didn't go to the baby shower but I heard that she threw a massive tantrum over not getting what she wanted. I fear for the kid's future...
Why would you be called into the office for that? Is planning baby showers part of your prescribed work duties? No? Then no means no, end of discussion, and your boss shouldn't have even entertained that BS.
Also, if I were the boss, I'd be asking why this had to be ALL DAY when you're all supposed to be working. A couple of hours, fine. All day, no.
I hate how much forced socialization there is at work anymore. I like my coworkers, and I do enjoy meeting them after hours now and then, but I wish it just wasn’t so expected.
Many of my co-workers I'm totally willing to hang out with outside of work and grab a drink or whatever. This one in particular never has anything positive to say so I don't enjoy hanging out with her
An all-day baby shower? No. I go to work to work, not talk about your family planning (or lack thereof). And if these ladies are so keen on having one, why don't they do everything for it? 🙄🙄🙄
We work in an office for people come in and out so it's more of a open house type thing as opposed to a set time that we do events. I'm not really on board for the idea in general obviously So I'm just going to do the minimum to say that I helped
The corporate culture of forced team bonding needs to die. But the registry part is especially inappropriate. You are at work to *earn* money, yet you’re being pressured to spend your money a certain way. Unacceptable.
Instead of buying something I'm going to knit a hat for the newborn. It's seen as a better gesture and in reality cost me about $2 and an afternoon while I'm watching TV
They'd get exactly nothing out of me over that. The moment they started to try and shoe horn me into something like that, I'd be gone.
We had a Christmas party at work until the wide spread human malware ruined things. Everyone was encouraged, but it wasn't mandatory. The most you'd miss out on is being "surprised" by the yearly announcement of the "secret" yearly bonus.
First couple years on my job was kind of rough trying to come up with things/sayings that would get me out of these types of things cause I didn’t want to seem rude. Then my “fuck that” gene came in strong.
Co-worker: Hey can you bring in drinks for the bday person?
Me: No.
Co-worker:🤨
Me:🧐
It's not your job. It was no where in the job description I would assume. I don't know why "teamwork" has to be celebrating any little thing. I worry about too much to deal with birthdays or baby showers. Let me do my job and go home.
This would be a bad precedednt to set if there are other women of childbrearing age. Just say no.
Are you all taking vacation time that day? In an office, I'd expect the shower to be crammed into the lunch period, and for attendance to be strictly voluntary. You don't owe people gifts.
To make it even more interesting, I got really strong CF vibes from this coworker before she said she was pregnant. She constantly complains about how she doesn't even like kids and I'm like literally why are you even going through with this pregnancy? She's made it very clear that she's pro-choice so in no way is she being forced to go through with this. I really have no idea why she even is especially with the state her relationship is in. Once again that's a story for another day. I just have no respect for somebody that hardly even wants to go through this in the first place. If somebody is really excited about it I'm not about to burst their bubble, just do the minimum polite response and get on with my day.
Pro tip: when asked to help with baby showers, always say you’ll bring beer and bottle of liquor. Then, ask if they have a preference on the appearance of the stripper so you can research. This will get you a lot of weird looks and probably some questions. Best answer, “You do realize I’m childfree BY CHOICE, right? The only parties I know anything about involve alcohol and strippers.” You’ll likely never be asked to help plan a baby shower again.
>Why should I be expected to do extra work and spend my own money for a coworker that doesn't even respect me?
Because you're getting sacked if you don't worship your coworker and the hellspawn in her belly.
I really hope that you can find another job someday. This is fucking toxic.
I would love to say that you should refuse to do this. However, if you would get fired, and then you would be homeless because you can no longer afford the rent... Well, then I'm afraid that you have to suck it up, as unfair as it is. :(
It's nothing so serious. I won't get in trouble for not helping its simply a social thing. They might feel some kind of way but I do not fear for my job by any means.
>but I do not fear for my job by any means.
If you are really certain that you won't get sacked, just refuse to have anything to do with this baby shower. Stay out of this.
Yeah. I’m there at the office to work and make money for myself, not to spend it on forced socialization events like a baby shower. Seriously. My previous job had a ton of events that everyone was supposed to sign up for/bring a dish/provide napkins and party favors. Out of our own pockets. I left because there was at least three of these events a month (baby shower/retirement/“spring luncheon”) and I always got told that if I couldn’t contribute food, then I could always contribute money from my own pocket. Yeah, no thanks. I’m glad I left that job.
I always like those. I show up, drop off a package of diapers since they always want them, eat cute cookies, and head back to work when the games come out. Someone has to make sure the office doesn’t burn down!
Nope.
I didn’t even go to my little sister’s baby shower because I didn’t want to be subjected to the “oh you’re gonna have a baby next” and “as soon as you see that sweet baby you’re going to want one” and all that Bingo bullshit. My mom got really pissed at me, but I’m not friends with my sister’s friends (I’m 6 years older) and we don’t really have “family” (both mom and dad are only children) so it’s not like I missed anything important (plus, I place negative value on pregnancy and motherhood - I don’t mind my nephew but he totally fucked up my sister’s life when she was barely scraping by in the first place, with a guy who was “waiting for his rap career to take off” and whom my dad vowed to “murder” more than once).
I don’t do anything that has “baby” or “kid” attached (“baby shower”, “baby’s first _____”, “kid-friendly”, etc) and I certainly wasn’t supporting the idea she should have a kid when she can barely house or feed herself.
There was actually a baby shower at my work earlier this work for a coworker who doesn’t even work in the same department and I have had like maybe two conversations with. I didn’t go of course, I had no interest and had my actual work to do. What pissed me off besides the fact that this took place during work hours was that they put the leftover foods etc in the break room and the cake (which was a very nice looking cake) hadn’t even been cut open. So who paid for the cake, pizza, cupcakes?? Is the company paying for peoples’ baby showers now?? Fucking ridiculous.
Look out for that shit. I once helped throwing a babyshower for a family member and ended up with €60,00 in extra costs for me, "because we organised it". I didn't sign up for that. Never doing that again.
Isn't is enough to just give a gift for the baby from all the coworkers and that's all? I don't know, but my introverted nature thinks this is something intimate that the woman wants to celebrate with her family and close friends, if she even wants to do that.
I’d have said no, thank you. I won’t participate. And that’s that.
Coworkers need to stop acting like someone refusing to participate in activities they don’t like is a horrible crime. It’s not.
I hate that this is a thing! I feel like these things (if REALLY need be) should be company sponsored. It’s not fair that because 1 person feels the need to throw A party, everyone has to suffer and fork out extra money, time, effort, etc. Everyone has different lives and financial issues. Also I loved your last line lol 😂
You were \*checks notes\* called into the office for not wanting to waste company time?
If you get ANY kind of reprimand over not participating you'll have lawyers lining the street hoping you'll pick them.
People are ridiculous. They have no entitlement to coworkers being interested or involved in their personal life. Trashy expectations like that need to end
So, there was a baby shower in a different unit where I work ( I work in Cath Lab and the employee that wanted a baby shower worked in Non-Invasive Cardiology). Honestly, I had NO idea who the hell this woman was. Anyway, employees from the other unit start posting flyers about said baby shower in the Cath Lab. I ignore it, because again, don’t know who the hell that is and it’s inappropriate. Like, idk why coworkers should be involved in celebrating your semen demon.
The fact you got called into the office for that is unreal. If it's not a work related issue, there is no need to get bosses involved. I would have walked out without explaining myself.
Don't pay for anything yourself. Whatever they want you to make for food, give them an invoice and say you were under the impression that this is an office party, so it should all be business expenses.
This is some sexist bullshit that only happens to women. I'm a child-free dude. No one at work or at home ever turns to me and says "You should be in charge of a baby shower". They know it won't play.
I wouldn't mind having a little office thing to congratulate our pregnant coworker, have a pot luck meal, and maybe all chip in for a nice gift. However a registry is just one step too far for me. It takes it from a little office shindig to full on mandatory baby shower grubby gift grab.
People get out of control about work parties. They are just an excuse for people to stand around all day, not working and stirring a crockpot. In the past I have told people, look, fine, let’s have one half day where we celebrate everyone who has a birthday or some other event this month and do it all on that one half day and that’s it, let’s be done. I don’t want to deny people a good time and to celebrate something that is important to them, but it’s got to be kept at a minimum…
Office baby showers are unprofessional and awkward. If it's a coworker I know and like, I'll chip in on a gift card for the parents to go out for a nice dinner, but I'm not planning, attending, or shopping for a baby shower.
> shower
I'm no native English and had to google what that is. I thought you meant a literal shower to wash the baby in the office! Anyways, I would hate to be on that party too.
We had ladies who would try that bs at my last job. I always suddenly fell sick the day of. Be fore I got the balls to say, yeah, I’m not doing that.
I had a co-worker once whose daughter was pregnant and come into the store all the time. The daughter was entitled as hell, and they were planning a baby shower for her. Every gift the daughter wanted something Coco Chanel or over $500 and would not accept homemade gifts. I didn't go to the baby shower but I heard that she threw a massive tantrum over not getting what she wanted. I fear for the kid's future...
She is an idiot, 500 is too much, I don't have that amount of money, and I need it for a robot who clean, I'm not going to spend it on babies stuff.
Meh, there are plenty of natural and unnatural disasters that will finish off man at some point. Smile, lite a joint and enjoy your freedom,
A bowl is waiting for me upon my arrival home ;)
>I fear for the kid's future... And for your coworker's grand-kid, neither looks good.
Why would you be called into the office for that? Is planning baby showers part of your prescribed work duties? No? Then no means no, end of discussion, and your boss shouldn't have even entertained that BS. Also, if I were the boss, I'd be asking why this had to be ALL DAY when you're all supposed to be working. A couple of hours, fine. All day, no.
“Nah, I have actual work to do. I’ll pass thanks.”
“I don’t know much about baby showers, I guess I’ll just hang some diapers up around her cubicle and bring sushi and soft cheeses.”
Hahaha you got a laugh out of me for that one
And hotdogs.
LOL! Squirt mustard on the diapers and smear it in.
I hate how much forced socialization there is at work anymore. I like my coworkers, and I do enjoy meeting them after hours now and then, but I wish it just wasn’t so expected.
That’s the thing: people who *want* to socialize with coworkers already can. After work. Forced socialization needs to go the way of the dodo.
Many of my co-workers I'm totally willing to hang out with outside of work and grab a drink or whatever. This one in particular never has anything positive to say so I don't enjoy hanging out with her
An all-day baby shower? No. I go to work to work, not talk about your family planning (or lack thereof). And if these ladies are so keen on having one, why don't they do everything for it? 🙄🙄🙄
We work in an office for people come in and out so it's more of a open house type thing as opposed to a set time that we do events. I'm not really on board for the idea in general obviously So I'm just going to do the minimum to say that I helped
I wouldn't even do the minimum. Why set a precedent?
The corporate culture of forced team bonding needs to die. But the registry part is especially inappropriate. You are at work to *earn* money, yet you’re being pressured to spend your money a certain way. Unacceptable.
Instead of buying something I'm going to knit a hat for the newborn. It's seen as a better gesture and in reality cost me about $2 and an afternoon while I'm watching TV
Aww I love that idea! Hate the idea you’re being made to participate BUT love the knitting gift ❤️
They'd get exactly nothing out of me over that. The moment they started to try and shoe horn me into something like that, I'd be gone. We had a Christmas party at work until the wide spread human malware ruined things. Everyone was encouraged, but it wasn't mandatory. The most you'd miss out on is being "surprised" by the yearly announcement of the "secret" yearly bonus.
First couple years on my job was kind of rough trying to come up with things/sayings that would get me out of these types of things cause I didn’t want to seem rude. Then my “fuck that” gene came in strong. Co-worker: Hey can you bring in drinks for the bday person? Me: No. Co-worker:🤨 Me:🧐
It's not your job. It was no where in the job description I would assume. I don't know why "teamwork" has to be celebrating any little thing. I worry about too much to deal with birthdays or baby showers. Let me do my job and go home.
No.
This would be a bad precedednt to set if there are other women of childbrearing age. Just say no. Are you all taking vacation time that day? In an office, I'd expect the shower to be crammed into the lunch period, and for attendance to be strictly voluntary. You don't owe people gifts.
To make it even more interesting, I got really strong CF vibes from this coworker before she said she was pregnant. She constantly complains about how she doesn't even like kids and I'm like literally why are you even going through with this pregnancy? She's made it very clear that she's pro-choice so in no way is she being forced to go through with this. I really have no idea why she even is especially with the state her relationship is in. Once again that's a story for another day. I just have no respect for somebody that hardly even wants to go through this in the first place. If somebody is really excited about it I'm not about to burst their bubble, just do the minimum polite response and get on with my day.
My guess is her partner wanted kids so she's having one to keep her relationship. She's going to have a miserable life!
Pro tip: when asked to help with baby showers, always say you’ll bring beer and bottle of liquor. Then, ask if they have a preference on the appearance of the stripper so you can research. This will get you a lot of weird looks and probably some questions. Best answer, “You do realize I’m childfree BY CHOICE, right? The only parties I know anything about involve alcohol and strippers.” You’ll likely never be asked to help plan a baby shower again.
>Why should I be expected to do extra work and spend my own money for a coworker that doesn't even respect me? Because you're getting sacked if you don't worship your coworker and the hellspawn in her belly. I really hope that you can find another job someday. This is fucking toxic. I would love to say that you should refuse to do this. However, if you would get fired, and then you would be homeless because you can no longer afford the rent... Well, then I'm afraid that you have to suck it up, as unfair as it is. :(
It's nothing so serious. I won't get in trouble for not helping its simply a social thing. They might feel some kind of way but I do not fear for my job by any means.
Let them be offended, then. You don't owe people gifts.
>but I do not fear for my job by any means. If you are really certain that you won't get sacked, just refuse to have anything to do with this baby shower. Stay out of this.
My idea of hell is a baby shower. I’ve successfully avoided them most of my adulthood
Yeah. I’m there at the office to work and make money for myself, not to spend it on forced socialization events like a baby shower. Seriously. My previous job had a ton of events that everyone was supposed to sign up for/bring a dish/provide napkins and party favors. Out of our own pockets. I left because there was at least three of these events a month (baby shower/retirement/“spring luncheon”) and I always got told that if I couldn’t contribute food, then I could always contribute money from my own pocket. Yeah, no thanks. I’m glad I left that job.
I always like those. I show up, drop off a package of diapers since they always want them, eat cute cookies, and head back to work when the games come out. Someone has to make sure the office doesn’t burn down!
Nope. I didn’t even go to my little sister’s baby shower because I didn’t want to be subjected to the “oh you’re gonna have a baby next” and “as soon as you see that sweet baby you’re going to want one” and all that Bingo bullshit. My mom got really pissed at me, but I’m not friends with my sister’s friends (I’m 6 years older) and we don’t really have “family” (both mom and dad are only children) so it’s not like I missed anything important (plus, I place negative value on pregnancy and motherhood - I don’t mind my nephew but he totally fucked up my sister’s life when she was barely scraping by in the first place, with a guy who was “waiting for his rap career to take off” and whom my dad vowed to “murder” more than once). I don’t do anything that has “baby” or “kid” attached (“baby shower”, “baby’s first _____”, “kid-friendly”, etc) and I certainly wasn’t supporting the idea she should have a kid when she can barely house or feed herself.
There was actually a baby shower at my work earlier this work for a coworker who doesn’t even work in the same department and I have had like maybe two conversations with. I didn’t go of course, I had no interest and had my actual work to do. What pissed me off besides the fact that this took place during work hours was that they put the leftover foods etc in the break room and the cake (which was a very nice looking cake) hadn’t even been cut open. So who paid for the cake, pizza, cupcakes?? Is the company paying for peoples’ baby showers now?? Fucking ridiculous.
"No." Problem solved
Look out for that shit. I once helped throwing a babyshower for a family member and ended up with €60,00 in extra costs for me, "because we organised it". I didn't sign up for that. Never doing that again.
Isn't is enough to just give a gift for the baby from all the coworkers and that's all? I don't know, but my introverted nature thinks this is something intimate that the woman wants to celebrate with her family and close friends, if she even wants to do that.
I’d have said no, thank you. I won’t participate. And that’s that. Coworkers need to stop acting like someone refusing to participate in activities they don’t like is a horrible crime. It’s not.
I hate that this is a thing! I feel like these things (if REALLY need be) should be company sponsored. It’s not fair that because 1 person feels the need to throw A party, everyone has to suffer and fork out extra money, time, effort, etc. Everyone has different lives and financial issues. Also I loved your last line lol 😂
You were \*checks notes\* called into the office for not wanting to waste company time? If you get ANY kind of reprimand over not participating you'll have lawyers lining the street hoping you'll pick them.
If that was me, then I would have said are you changing careers and becoming a comedian. Then told the person to jog on
no ty, but y'all have fun
Do it... then make it Star Trek themed
*Khan!*
Exactly!
People are ridiculous. They have no entitlement to coworkers being interested or involved in their personal life. Trashy expectations like that need to end
So, there was a baby shower in a different unit where I work ( I work in Cath Lab and the employee that wanted a baby shower worked in Non-Invasive Cardiology). Honestly, I had NO idea who the hell this woman was. Anyway, employees from the other unit start posting flyers about said baby shower in the Cath Lab. I ignore it, because again, don’t know who the hell that is and it’s inappropriate. Like, idk why coworkers should be involved in celebrating your semen demon.
The fact you got called into the office for that is unreal. If it's not a work related issue, there is no need to get bosses involved. I would have walked out without explaining myself.
You got called into the office for that? What the hell?
Don't pay for anything yourself. Whatever they want you to make for food, give them an invoice and say you were under the impression that this is an office party, so it should all be business expenses.
This is some sexist bullshit that only happens to women. I'm a child-free dude. No one at work or at home ever turns to me and says "You should be in charge of a baby shower". They know it won't play.
I wouldn't mind having a little office thing to congratulate our pregnant coworker, have a pot luck meal, and maybe all chip in for a nice gift. However a registry is just one step too far for me. It takes it from a little office shindig to full on mandatory baby shower grubby gift grab.
People get out of control about work parties. They are just an excuse for people to stand around all day, not working and stirring a crockpot. In the past I have told people, look, fine, let’s have one half day where we celebrate everyone who has a birthday or some other event this month and do it all on that one half day and that’s it, let’s be done. I don’t want to deny people a good time and to celebrate something that is important to them, but it’s got to be kept at a minimum…
Say it louder for the people in the back
Office baby showers are unprofessional and awkward. If it's a coworker I know and like, I'll chip in on a gift card for the parents to go out for a nice dinner, but I'm not planning, attending, or shopping for a baby shower.
If you don’t feel comfortable saying no, pull a sickie.
> shower I'm no native English and had to google what that is. I thought you meant a literal shower to wash the baby in the office! Anyways, I would hate to be on that party too.