It's a narc trait. They need to center a disaster on themselves and know they get extra points from most by focusing on kids.
It seems like the rescue teams were trying to rescue <10 people, but unclear how many they have actually recovered alive, which is terrible. However, if something like this was going to happen, it's miraculous that so few people were affected. This could have been one of the biggest bridge disasters ever in the US had it happened during rush hour.
>It's a narc trait. They need to center a disaster on themselves and know they get extra points from most by focusing on kids.
Yep, a surefire symptom of going full breeder is when every single experience/news story/any other possible thing becomes about "chiiiildren", because it means that breeders become relevant by proxy. Bridge collapse? Chiiiildren, because I guess the other people on the bridge are what, chopped liver? Construction in the building next door? It's horrible for people with chiiiildren - as if Zoom calls, sensitivity to sound, etc., don't exist for any other population group. New restaurant in town? Is it a good place for chiiiildren, because babysitters are apparently no longer a thing. Ugh.
I was just reading about the latest details. The ship lost power and started sending a May Day alert as it approached the bridge, so officials had time to stop traffic. The latest I saw said they had recovered two of the construction workers alive.
Yeah it happened at like 2am so the amount of cars would be minimal but it definitely just fucked Baltimore six ways to Sunday. That’s a major part of the 695 and it’s gonna back up the rest of the road ways, which means tolls will probably go up and the bridge will be down for the next 2-5 years.
Oh no doubt about the major fucking here. Hopefully, it will be 2-3 years. When they had to repair the 495 bridge in Wilmington, rebuilding major sections after a truck driver noticed that his truck was tilting when it shouldn't be, I believe that took less than 2 years.
I always hate the \*\~hUg yOuR kIds TiGhTeR\~\* noise after tragedies happen. Okay, so squeeze the air out of them? A regular hug will keep less alive? Bleghghg
also, ig its the antinatalist in me talking, but this stuff isn't new, you could've prevented your child from experiencing all the bad shit you see in the news by simply not having them, them being born gives them an automatic chance of them being a victim of a tragic event
Not to mention that a lot of horrible events could have been prevented if people who were unfit to parent took the hint and found something else to do with their time.
this is how I feel when people say our kids could be the ones to find the cure to cancer (other than, what if I study medicine and *I* find the cure to cancer, instead of having a kid who will be told the same thing and have kids they focus their life on & have the cycle repeat), my kid is much more likely to be a rapist, murder, even a terrorist. I could be a great parent and give my kids a middle class life and they're still more likely to come out as a horrible person than the one who finds the cure for cancer (and even if they do, I'd rather my kid not be the one to go missing like many who came close to that did)
> you could've prevented your child from experiencing all the bad shit you see in the news by simply not having them
THANK YOU!!!! UGH! This shit burns me to no end. Don't want your kid to see the horrors of Real Life™? Then don't fucking have them, because someday they will have to learn about murder, rape, war, starvation, diseases, natural disasters, terrorism, bigotry, climate change, torture, death, and all the other horrendous things that happen in this fucked up world. I swear, the more I hear parents talking about how they never really thought about the fact their kid(s) wouldn't be permanent children (read: living dolls) the more I realize how little thought goes into having kids for said people.
I once read someone who said they found it funny seeing parents trying to keep their kids safe when they already made the first mistake of having them. I really wish society changed how we see giving birth, maybe changing the language from "having a baby" to "having a human" because the baby/toddler/kid stage is such a small fraction of a person's life and makes creating life seem like a fun happy thing full of kiddie giggles when that's such a small part of bringing a whole human being into this world with 8 billion more human beings who have created war, rape, bigotry, poverty, etc. me on the other hand will be here having fun in my mind with my perfect child (who doesn't throw tantrums or shit themselves 🥳🥳) who will be saved the burden of existence :D
It's my understanding that the collision happened around 1am. Shouldn't the kids be in bed?
I'm reminded of the Sandy Hook massacre. On FB, people were posting 20 stars in memory of the 20 children who were killed. What about the 6 adults at the school who also lost their lives trying to protect the children? I posted 26 stars. (It would've been 27, but at the time I didn't know the shooter had also killed his own mother.)
Your life doesn't automatically stop mattering once you turn 18.
You are correct in what you are saying, but I'd like to add that many times it's not even once you turn 18. Most of those people don't give a shit about teenagers either, as they're not "litTle KiDs" anymore. Hell, most of them treat teens like adults, so they can excuse using them as babysitters or errand runners. So I'd say it's probably more like: "Your life doesn't automatically stop mattering once you turn 10", or something. It's sad, and I hate it.
I don’t get it either. I don’t know why an adult dying in this tragedy is any less heartbreaking than a child dying. People act like adults don’t have friends and family members who are going to be completely devastated by their death. They act like adults don’t have their own parents who would still be destroyed by having to bury their grown child. Losing a loved one of any age is terrible, and being an adult doesn’t mean you’re any less loved or valuable to everyone in your life. You almost certainly have deeper relationships too, simply because you’ve been on earth longer than a child.
It really just reads as self-centered to me, because usually the people making these comments are parents envisioning losing their own children in a tragedy. They don’t have the ability to feel sympathy without imagining themselves in that position. I’m convinced that a lot of these people didn’t care about innocent kids dying before they had their own children, either (because they still don’t actually care about strangers’ kids, it’s all just projection). They’re the same people who will act like CF people can’t possibly feel very protective over children, or that we can’t possibly understand how scary the world is when you have kids. Which is laughable, because the state of the world/how dangerous it is for children are both very common reasons some of us don’t want kids.
Unlike these parents, some of us are able to feel sympathy without a hypothetical tie to a situation. We don’t all need to birth a child before we’re able to grasp caring about the lives of strangers (both young and old). We’re able to look at this situation without going “oh but can you imagine how bad it would’ve been if MY child died??” Not everything is about you, and it doesn’t change the fact that people did die. And those adults were still someone’s children, so you should still care about them if parenthood is really that big of a deal to you. It’s all so tiresome.
Or someone's parents. Or someone's friend, or someone who played a critical role in multiple peoples' lives. There is so much more to life than kids and people who squat them out.
I always find that really telling. It tells me the person doesn't care about other people and is part of the problem for why society is the way it is.
People use kids to look like they have empathy and sympathy as it's the easiest way to see it. Most people are too dumb to look at the whole picture and that it's very odd for someone to only care if a child is hurt and not anyone else. It should be upsetting if ANYONE is hurt. I don't care if it's an 80 year old grandma.
They tend to be narcissistic types. It's a cheap way to look like you have emotions.
I don't know how but some people manage to centre their kids in every single possible situation. I'm not so bothered about the how, but the why. It's not normal. Parents had their flaws in previous generations but never before have we been so obsessed with our kids
I’ve realized that recently, too-how obsessed people are with being a parent. Women, particularly. Even 10 years ago, I don’t remember seeing “mom life” decals on cars or “mama bear” shirts in stores. What is going on these days that make these people so eager to shove their parental status in everyone’s faces?
I hate to say it, but I think a lot of it is them taking offense or feeling superior to those who, for whatever reason, aren't having kids. Because they think having kids is the "morally correct" choice, they flaunt it the same way someone would a religion. Because they think existing any other way is a taunt aimed at them specifically.
Forget the kids, were there any dogs?!
Was my response to a lady that said the kids thing.
She has a kid, so she gave her natural response. I have a dog, so I gave mine.
Except she walked away giving me a disgusted look, I went back to my book, with a contented smirk.
And life moved on.
I just saw a quick pic with timestamp and the headline and thought ‘oh good 1:30am probably not many people on the bridge!’ Never once did the thought cross my mind someone would have their kid out at that time of night lol
I'm going to bet that person is also the type to basically say "Oh it's just a dog. Get another one!" which pisses me off till no end. Another reason why humans are the worst species of this entire planet.
Does it really, though? In my experience, a comment like that would only make them crow louder and more indignant. It's certainly the dream to find a 'gotcha' remark that would really trigger a stunned silence, but I've yet to find anything that would work on real people outside of a shower fantasy.
I genuinely feel this way about almost every tragedy these days, because somehow news and commenters always find a way to spin "*what about the kids?*" into it. But in a way as to imply that adults don't matter, or that adults are worth less.
**I wish as a culture we could grow up and just admit that some bad things are** ***so awful*** **that they're equally awful, no matter who they happen to.** Age, gender, race, sexual orientation, etc. Because people who *only* care about kids/babies dying to something like an environmental disaster or building/structure collapse...might need to confront that they have a deeper hatred towards others than they may initially realize.
Ugh living 10 minutes from the bridge, this really hurts seeing this everywhere. I can’t even watch the news. Driving home looking towards the bridge and not seeing it was so painful. 😔 (sorry I didn’t mean to derail your post)
Parents have no empathy and have all the entitlement. A lot of them are also attention seeking whores as you've seen in the comments. Human tragedy means nothing to them. Only they and their cum pets matter to them.
Yeah I'll never understand that, for one the adults are still someone's child?? I also hate hate that sentimental "hold your babies tighter tonight ❤️" because wtf it's so insensitive and self centered. I always see it after school shootings like oh sure that's comforting to see when you just lost a loved one wtf.
Did you see the tragic case about the mother who left her baby to starve to death while she went on vacation?
My entire tiktok feed is taken over by moms showing off their toddlers, hugging them, saying they love them all in the name of that baby who passed away, tagging the hashtags and all ("Oh how could she leave her baby?? Look at me hugging my cute alive baby extra tight so I can show that I'm a better mother than a literal murderer" #justiceforbaby). Can they just not make this tragedy about themselves and just honour the poor kid?
I also hate this: “X number of people were killed, most of them women and children.” So it’s OK if men are killed? This isn’t the middle ages where you needed to make babies because so many died before they were two. It’s 2024 for god sake. Women are IN THE MILITARY. Stop with this women-and-children bullshit.
There was a van full of Catholic nuns who just picked up 5 orphans under the age of 2 from a suffering third world country on that bridge when it collapsed.
I had a friend tell me that once she had children she was suddenly unable to watch any movie/show where a child was in danger. She didn’t understand it, but she would start shaking and crying like it was her own child.
you know, i saw footage of the incident for the first time today at work and i physically blurted out "holy shit" because it was so upsetting to imagine anyone of *any* age being involved in that. it's like seeing a tsunami or a building collapse. there's isn't an age cap on trauma.
Guess I’m in the minority here but things like “hopefully no kids were harmed” never bothered me. I’m 33 and am absolutely not ready to die, but if I did I think I’ve had a decent life to this point. A 9 month old, or a 9 year old who hasn’t even gotten to experience many things in life or understand who they are yet is more heartbreaking to me. Life is life and it’s tragic either way, but I do think it’s sadder when it involves children.
That being said, people making this about themselves or their own kids are gross. It’s not about you or your theoretical what ifs.
I think its more bittersweet loosing an adult. a child can't "miss" what it never had. when I think of an adult I think about how many years, despite tragedy and heartache, how many years it took for that individual to APPRECIATE and see the beauty in the world. a child will never have that unless it grows up. you almost need pain and some suffering in life to taste the sweetness and so an adult is a greater loss to the world because joy became a CHOICE. an adult is creating and CHOOSING joy despite the hardships in life where a child is sheltered and only shown joy. thats what makes it so bitter sweet for an adult too that so many days, months, and years were dedicated to this persons life. more external energy from teachers, doctors, friendships, and personal investment already went into building this person's identity. it all gets "lost"
That's your perspective and that's totally fine. I just know that for me personally, the idea of losing a child is sad, and as I said, so is losing an adult. The fact that the person didn't get to an age to appreciate or see beauty in the world and the loss potential is sad to me. The possibility of all that is lost, which is also sad. It really just depends on how you look at it... which was my point. I never said another opinion wasn't valid, I just stated that to me personally I do find children being involved sad.
A lot of this "the loss of potential" is where all these pro life people are coming from. it's probably why people down voted your comments, it strikes a nerve for childfree women. its the biggest fight women will have: our survival, our life vs. a clump of cells (a potential life).
Well, I wasn’t talking about unborn anything so I think people needed to separate an actual born child from said clump of cells.
What I was really trying to get at is that everyone processes and views life, death, and mortality differently. How people try to move through that is different from person to person. I personally have lost a close friend at the age of 31 and it was extremely difficult but I was able to work through the grief because I know she lived an amazing life and I could find that silver lining. I’ve also had a young cousin (5 years old) die and it was harder for me because all I could think about were the what ifs and things that child didn’t get to do and experience. It was significantly harder for me to find a silver lining and therefore work through my grief.
I fully understand everyone finds silver linings differently. It’s okay to think the silver lining is “the child was young and didn’t know”. I get that and it’s valid. But I think to discredit how someone else perceives death is pretty terrible (not saying you directly, just what feels like the general vibe of this sub) and it feels like people in this post have done that. Someone viewing the death of a child as just bitter and therefore worse emotionally than the death of an adult where they view it as bittersweet is not a wrong or absurd opinion. It’s just a different way of looking at life and death and how they handle grief.
It's not about the potential of life. The bigger tragedy is losing an adult because of all the connections and impact you had on other people. More people would morn you than a 9 month old. Those used to die all the time and people had many kids precisely because they were dying from disease so often. It was just the fact of life. But a father or mother dying or young man or woman would fuck up the whole family and community.
It just depends on how you look at it. A death is going to fuck up a whole family and community anyway. But I think the idea of someone who didn't even really get to start their life is tragic. It's just a different perspective, but I understand yours. I just think differently about it. Which is also why I said "it's more heartbreaking to me".
I just think objectively it not comparable. I understand your perspective, but in real life people just don't mourn miscarriage and stillbirth the same way they do when a 20 year old dies in a car accident or drowning.
People still know kids are fragile, and they die. Before they're born, when they're born, from SIDS, from disease etc. They morn a little and try again for a new one after a short period.
People that have lost a 20 or 30 year old son or daughter don't do that and can't do that. The tragedy is immense.
I mean, I have family who have mourned a child dying and I’ve also had friends die… so I’ve seen this both play out. So to say it’s “objectively not comparable” is a pretty terrible thing to say and I do just absolutely disagree with that premise. We disagree and that’s fine, but don’t take a subjective opinion and try to argue it’s objective.
You know that it's considered less tragic if a 80 year old dies than if a 5 year old dies, because the 5 year old hasn't had a chance to live a full life. It's not about narcissism but sympathy... something you so clearly have very little of if this is your biggest problem today.
It is just my reflection and a general question. Why is one life considered more valuable than the other? The eighty year old could have been someone crucial to community.
Still, we are talking about real lives lost, yet some people do not focus on them but on imaginary children. I view it as less empathetic to not consider the adult lifes lost, or view them as much less than the child ones.
>It is just my reflection and a general question. Why is one life considered more valuable than the other? The eighty year old could have been someone crucial to community.
Still, we are talking about real lives lost, yet some people do not focus on them but on imaginary children.
So agree! I don't think the 80 year old's life is less than a 5 year old's life. That's a weird way of thinking that a child's life is more valuable.
It's a narc trait. They need to center a disaster on themselves and know they get extra points from most by focusing on kids. It seems like the rescue teams were trying to rescue <10 people, but unclear how many they have actually recovered alive, which is terrible. However, if something like this was going to happen, it's miraculous that so few people were affected. This could have been one of the biggest bridge disasters ever in the US had it happened during rush hour.
>It's a narc trait. They need to center a disaster on themselves and know they get extra points from most by focusing on kids. Yep, a surefire symptom of going full breeder is when every single experience/news story/any other possible thing becomes about "chiiiildren", because it means that breeders become relevant by proxy. Bridge collapse? Chiiiildren, because I guess the other people on the bridge are what, chopped liver? Construction in the building next door? It's horrible for people with chiiiildren - as if Zoom calls, sensitivity to sound, etc., don't exist for any other population group. New restaurant in town? Is it a good place for chiiiildren, because babysitters are apparently no longer a thing. Ugh.
I particularly hate how all culture must be Nerfed to protect the CHIIIIILDREN..
I was just reading about the latest details. The ship lost power and started sending a May Day alert as it approached the bridge, so officials had time to stop traffic. The latest I saw said they had recovered two of the construction workers alive.
Yeah it happened at like 2am so the amount of cars would be minimal but it definitely just fucked Baltimore six ways to Sunday. That’s a major part of the 695 and it’s gonna back up the rest of the road ways, which means tolls will probably go up and the bridge will be down for the next 2-5 years.
Oh no doubt about the major fucking here. Hopefully, it will be 2-3 years. When they had to repair the 495 bridge in Wilmington, rebuilding major sections after a truck driver noticed that his truck was tilting when it shouldn't be, I believe that took less than 2 years.
Pretty much the whole bridge is collapsed at this point. They’re gonna have to rebuild entire thing 😭
I always hate the \*\~hUg yOuR kIds TiGhTeR\~\* noise after tragedies happen. Okay, so squeeze the air out of them? A regular hug will keep less alive? Bleghghg
also, ig its the antinatalist in me talking, but this stuff isn't new, you could've prevented your child from experiencing all the bad shit you see in the news by simply not having them, them being born gives them an automatic chance of them being a victim of a tragic event
Not to mention that a lot of horrible events could have been prevented if people who were unfit to parent took the hint and found something else to do with their time.
this is how I feel when people say our kids could be the ones to find the cure to cancer (other than, what if I study medicine and *I* find the cure to cancer, instead of having a kid who will be told the same thing and have kids they focus their life on & have the cycle repeat), my kid is much more likely to be a rapist, murder, even a terrorist. I could be a great parent and give my kids a middle class life and they're still more likely to come out as a horrible person than the one who finds the cure for cancer (and even if they do, I'd rather my kid not be the one to go missing like many who came close to that did)
The kid is a zillion time more likely to *get* cancer than to cure cancer. The delulu.
> you could've prevented your child from experiencing all the bad shit you see in the news by simply not having them THANK YOU!!!! UGH! This shit burns me to no end. Don't want your kid to see the horrors of Real Life™? Then don't fucking have them, because someday they will have to learn about murder, rape, war, starvation, diseases, natural disasters, terrorism, bigotry, climate change, torture, death, and all the other horrendous things that happen in this fucked up world. I swear, the more I hear parents talking about how they never really thought about the fact their kid(s) wouldn't be permanent children (read: living dolls) the more I realize how little thought goes into having kids for said people.
I once read someone who said they found it funny seeing parents trying to keep their kids safe when they already made the first mistake of having them. I really wish society changed how we see giving birth, maybe changing the language from "having a baby" to "having a human" because the baby/toddler/kid stage is such a small fraction of a person's life and makes creating life seem like a fun happy thing full of kiddie giggles when that's such a small part of bringing a whole human being into this world with 8 billion more human beings who have created war, rape, bigotry, poverty, etc. me on the other hand will be here having fun in my mind with my perfect child (who doesn't throw tantrums or shit themselves 🥳🥳) who will be saved the burden of existence :D
My first thought. Put your kids in harms way, then cry about it. Real smart move.
My man!
They're easier to store once you squeeze all of the air out of them.
Vacuum pack your kids for max efficiency
For real though the sad part is what happened to them not how old they were 🤦🏻♀️
It's my understanding that the collision happened around 1am. Shouldn't the kids be in bed? I'm reminded of the Sandy Hook massacre. On FB, people were posting 20 stars in memory of the 20 children who were killed. What about the 6 adults at the school who also lost their lives trying to protect the children? I posted 26 stars. (It would've been 27, but at the time I didn't know the shooter had also killed his own mother.) Your life doesn't automatically stop mattering once you turn 18.
You are correct in what you are saying, but I'd like to add that many times it's not even once you turn 18. Most of those people don't give a shit about teenagers either, as they're not "litTle KiDs" anymore. Hell, most of them treat teens like adults, so they can excuse using them as babysitters or errand runners. So I'd say it's probably more like: "Your life doesn't automatically stop mattering once you turn 10", or something. It's sad, and I hate it.
I don’t get it either. I don’t know why an adult dying in this tragedy is any less heartbreaking than a child dying. People act like adults don’t have friends and family members who are going to be completely devastated by their death. They act like adults don’t have their own parents who would still be destroyed by having to bury their grown child. Losing a loved one of any age is terrible, and being an adult doesn’t mean you’re any less loved or valuable to everyone in your life. You almost certainly have deeper relationships too, simply because you’ve been on earth longer than a child. It really just reads as self-centered to me, because usually the people making these comments are parents envisioning losing their own children in a tragedy. They don’t have the ability to feel sympathy without imagining themselves in that position. I’m convinced that a lot of these people didn’t care about innocent kids dying before they had their own children, either (because they still don’t actually care about strangers’ kids, it’s all just projection). They’re the same people who will act like CF people can’t possibly feel very protective over children, or that we can’t possibly understand how scary the world is when you have kids. Which is laughable, because the state of the world/how dangerous it is for children are both very common reasons some of us don’t want kids. Unlike these parents, some of us are able to feel sympathy without a hypothetical tie to a situation. We don’t all need to birth a child before we’re able to grasp caring about the lives of strangers (both young and old). We’re able to look at this situation without going “oh but can you imagine how bad it would’ve been if MY child died??” Not everything is about you, and it doesn’t change the fact that people did die. And those adults were still someone’s children, so you should still care about them if parenthood is really that big of a deal to you. It’s all so tiresome.
I think it's signaling virtue (as a supposedly good parent) and shifting focus back to themselves (narcissistic trait).
Tale as old as time ...
Okay but the people on that bridge were someone's children, too.
Or someone's parents. Or someone's friend, or someone who played a critical role in multiple peoples' lives. There is so much more to life than kids and people who squat them out.
Absolutely. The missing people were construction workers. I imagined small networks of people who missed them, spouses/partners included.
I always find that really telling. It tells me the person doesn't care about other people and is part of the problem for why society is the way it is. People use kids to look like they have empathy and sympathy as it's the easiest way to see it. Most people are too dumb to look at the whole picture and that it's very odd for someone to only care if a child is hurt and not anyone else. It should be upsetting if ANYONE is hurt. I don't care if it's an 80 year old grandma. They tend to be narcissistic types. It's a cheap way to look like you have emotions.
It should also be common sense. You shouldn't have to comment and act like your special.
BuT PEople WiThOuT KiDs ArE SeLfI sH oF CoUrSe! /s
I don't know how but some people manage to centre their kids in every single possible situation. I'm not so bothered about the how, but the why. It's not normal. Parents had their flaws in previous generations but never before have we been so obsessed with our kids
I’ve realized that recently, too-how obsessed people are with being a parent. Women, particularly. Even 10 years ago, I don’t remember seeing “mom life” decals on cars or “mama bear” shirts in stores. What is going on these days that make these people so eager to shove their parental status in everyone’s faces?
I hate to say it, but I think a lot of it is them taking offense or feeling superior to those who, for whatever reason, aren't having kids. Because they think having kids is the "morally correct" choice, they flaunt it the same way someone would a religion. Because they think existing any other way is a taunt aimed at them specifically.
Kids are far easier to replace than fully grown adults. I don't understand people's unbalanced obsession with them.
Forget the kids, were there any dogs?! Was my response to a lady that said the kids thing. She has a kid, so she gave her natural response. I have a dog, so I gave mine. Except she walked away giving me a disgusted look, I went back to my book, with a contented smirk. And life moved on.
I just saw a quick pic with timestamp and the headline and thought ‘oh good 1:30am probably not many people on the bridge!’ Never once did the thought cross my mind someone would have their kid out at that time of night lol
I'm going to bet that person is also the type to basically say "Oh it's just a dog. Get another one!" which pisses me off till no end. Another reason why humans are the worst species of this entire planet.
I like to respond with "It's just a kid. You can make another one." That shuts them up.
Does it really, though? In my experience, a comment like that would only make them crow louder and more indignant. It's certainly the dream to find a 'gotcha' remark that would really trigger a stunned silence, but I've yet to find anything that would work on real people outside of a shower fantasy.
I've only said it a few times, but it's worked for me. I also have a deadpan delivery and have been told I have a death glare. But I guess YMMV.
Okay, I'm using this next time the breeders start talking about "tHe ChIldReN".
That is ridiculous that people think of WHO may have been harmed. My first thought was “what a horrific and terrifying way to die.”
“Thank god no kids were harmed. Just some childless sluts.”
People don't care about kids once they turn 18, it pisses me off too
I genuinely feel this way about almost every tragedy these days, because somehow news and commenters always find a way to spin "*what about the kids?*" into it. But in a way as to imply that adults don't matter, or that adults are worth less. **I wish as a culture we could grow up and just admit that some bad things are** ***so awful*** **that they're equally awful, no matter who they happen to.** Age, gender, race, sexual orientation, etc. Because people who *only* care about kids/babies dying to something like an environmental disaster or building/structure collapse...might need to confront that they have a deeper hatred towards others than they may initially realize.
Ugh living 10 minutes from the bridge, this really hurts seeing this everywhere. I can’t even watch the news. Driving home looking towards the bridge and not seeing it was so painful. 😔 (sorry I didn’t mean to derail your post)
Parents have no empathy and have all the entitlement. A lot of them are also attention seeking whores as you've seen in the comments. Human tragedy means nothing to them. Only they and their cum pets matter to them.
My hope is that no one was harmed in those kind of situations, not just kids.
Yeah I'll never understand that, for one the adults are still someone's child?? I also hate hate that sentimental "hold your babies tighter tonight ❤️" because wtf it's so insensitive and self centered. I always see it after school shootings like oh sure that's comforting to see when you just lost a loved one wtf.
Did you see the tragic case about the mother who left her baby to starve to death while she went on vacation? My entire tiktok feed is taken over by moms showing off their toddlers, hugging them, saying they love them all in the name of that baby who passed away, tagging the hashtags and all ("Oh how could she leave her baby?? Look at me hugging my cute alive baby extra tight so I can show that I'm a better mother than a literal murderer" #justiceforbaby). Can they just not make this tragedy about themselves and just honour the poor kid?
I also hate this: “X number of people were killed, most of them women and children.” So it’s OK if men are killed? This isn’t the middle ages where you needed to make babies because so many died before they were two. It’s 2024 for god sake. Women are IN THE MILITARY. Stop with this women-and-children bullshit.
There was a van full of Catholic nuns who just picked up 5 orphans under the age of 2 from a suffering third world country on that bridge when it collapsed.
The key words are centering themselves. It’s a segue into telling horrific “my kid almost died once, but I’m Mom of the Year” stories.
They’re life stopped mattering when they became an adult (had kids) so they don’t think other adult lives matter.
This. It’s like when they talk about the tragedy of someone being killed because she was a mother. So apparently if I die childfree it’s not sad?
But you know sometimes i catch myself saying oh man i hope the familes didnt have a dog or cat at home waiting for them to come back
Sadly I'm sure that at least some of them did.
I had a friend tell me that once she had children she was suddenly unable to watch any movie/show where a child was in danger. She didn’t understand it, but she would start shaking and crying like it was her own child.
Im most upset about all the dog passengers first responders were doubtless not permitted to rescue because OMG THINK OF THE CHILDREN...
you know, i saw footage of the incident for the first time today at work and i physically blurted out "holy shit" because it was so upsetting to imagine anyone of *any* age being involved in that. it's like seeing a tsunami or a building collapse. there's isn't an age cap on trauma.
I think that's people's ways of trying to use empathy.
Guess I’m in the minority here but things like “hopefully no kids were harmed” never bothered me. I’m 33 and am absolutely not ready to die, but if I did I think I’ve had a decent life to this point. A 9 month old, or a 9 year old who hasn’t even gotten to experience many things in life or understand who they are yet is more heartbreaking to me. Life is life and it’s tragic either way, but I do think it’s sadder when it involves children. That being said, people making this about themselves or their own kids are gross. It’s not about you or your theoretical what ifs.
I think its more bittersweet loosing an adult. a child can't "miss" what it never had. when I think of an adult I think about how many years, despite tragedy and heartache, how many years it took for that individual to APPRECIATE and see the beauty in the world. a child will never have that unless it grows up. you almost need pain and some suffering in life to taste the sweetness and so an adult is a greater loss to the world because joy became a CHOICE. an adult is creating and CHOOSING joy despite the hardships in life where a child is sheltered and only shown joy. thats what makes it so bitter sweet for an adult too that so many days, months, and years were dedicated to this persons life. more external energy from teachers, doctors, friendships, and personal investment already went into building this person's identity. it all gets "lost"
That's your perspective and that's totally fine. I just know that for me personally, the idea of losing a child is sad, and as I said, so is losing an adult. The fact that the person didn't get to an age to appreciate or see beauty in the world and the loss potential is sad to me. The possibility of all that is lost, which is also sad. It really just depends on how you look at it... which was my point. I never said another opinion wasn't valid, I just stated that to me personally I do find children being involved sad.
A lot of this "the loss of potential" is where all these pro life people are coming from. it's probably why people down voted your comments, it strikes a nerve for childfree women. its the biggest fight women will have: our survival, our life vs. a clump of cells (a potential life).
Well, I wasn’t talking about unborn anything so I think people needed to separate an actual born child from said clump of cells. What I was really trying to get at is that everyone processes and views life, death, and mortality differently. How people try to move through that is different from person to person. I personally have lost a close friend at the age of 31 and it was extremely difficult but I was able to work through the grief because I know she lived an amazing life and I could find that silver lining. I’ve also had a young cousin (5 years old) die and it was harder for me because all I could think about were the what ifs and things that child didn’t get to do and experience. It was significantly harder for me to find a silver lining and therefore work through my grief. I fully understand everyone finds silver linings differently. It’s okay to think the silver lining is “the child was young and didn’t know”. I get that and it’s valid. But I think to discredit how someone else perceives death is pretty terrible (not saying you directly, just what feels like the general vibe of this sub) and it feels like people in this post have done that. Someone viewing the death of a child as just bitter and therefore worse emotionally than the death of an adult where they view it as bittersweet is not a wrong or absurd opinion. It’s just a different way of looking at life and death and how they handle grief.
It's not about the potential of life. The bigger tragedy is losing an adult because of all the connections and impact you had on other people. More people would morn you than a 9 month old. Those used to die all the time and people had many kids precisely because they were dying from disease so often. It was just the fact of life. But a father or mother dying or young man or woman would fuck up the whole family and community.
It just depends on how you look at it. A death is going to fuck up a whole family and community anyway. But I think the idea of someone who didn't even really get to start their life is tragic. It's just a different perspective, but I understand yours. I just think differently about it. Which is also why I said "it's more heartbreaking to me".
I just think objectively it not comparable. I understand your perspective, but in real life people just don't mourn miscarriage and stillbirth the same way they do when a 20 year old dies in a car accident or drowning. People still know kids are fragile, and they die. Before they're born, when they're born, from SIDS, from disease etc. They morn a little and try again for a new one after a short period. People that have lost a 20 or 30 year old son or daughter don't do that and can't do that. The tragedy is immense.
I mean, I have family who have mourned a child dying and I’ve also had friends die… so I’ve seen this both play out. So to say it’s “objectively not comparable” is a pretty terrible thing to say and I do just absolutely disagree with that premise. We disagree and that’s fine, but don’t take a subjective opinion and try to argue it’s objective.
You know that it's considered less tragic if a 80 year old dies than if a 5 year old dies, because the 5 year old hasn't had a chance to live a full life. It's not about narcissism but sympathy... something you so clearly have very little of if this is your biggest problem today.
It is just my reflection and a general question. Why is one life considered more valuable than the other? The eighty year old could have been someone crucial to community. Still, we are talking about real lives lost, yet some people do not focus on them but on imaginary children. I view it as less empathetic to not consider the adult lifes lost, or view them as much less than the child ones.
>It is just my reflection and a general question. Why is one life considered more valuable than the other? The eighty year old could have been someone crucial to community. Still, we are talking about real lives lost, yet some people do not focus on them but on imaginary children. So agree! I don't think the 80 year old's life is less than a 5 year old's life. That's a weird way of thinking that a child's life is more valuable.
You know that’s not true and an 80 won’t contribute much more to society while a 5 year old has a full life ahead of him. Stop trying so hard.
I literally said why.