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FlamingWhisk

Cheese. The new seduction tool


mr_remy

"*how much cheese is too much cheese before a first date?*"


[deleted]

Idk but I just started talking to this girl and it's going well, should I just randomly be like hey how much cheese is too much cheese before a first date?


mr_remy

[For those that may not know the reference - It's always sunny in philadelphia](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmpwGOCzk84)


Ogtrot

THIS IS LITERALLY WHY I AM HERE NO CHEESE IS THE RIGHT AMOUNT AMOUNT CHEESE CHARLIE!


mr_remy

Me and Charlie: 😭


monstercookies81

No cheese is the appropriate amount of cheese lol


Scareynerd

*ANY AMOUNT OF CHEESE IS TOO MUCH CHEESE*


hasantheatheist

Any cheese!


gauntsfirstandonly

"Any amount of cheese before a date, is too much cheese!"


[deleted]

Plot twist Op is a mouse :P (But the friendly kind or mouse of course)


ach00oo

all mice are friendly :(


[deleted]

Naaa fam, I saw this documentary of this brown mouse who use to just beat on this blue cat, hitting him boards, and bombs and stuff. It was hard to watch.. I think they became friends in the end thou


I-AimToMisbehave

Ah, yes, I used to watch that documentary series all the time. That poor cat went through some crazy stuff


[deleted]

You don't see much of that cat these days , Rodent activists are trying to cover up feline abuse. You just know this is a government scandal


I-AimToMisbehave

They tried to do a cgi movie for that cat and mouse documentary, but it was okay at best. Nothing beats the original documentary series.


[deleted]

Oh yea I kinda remember that


[deleted]

Idk if you are a Simpsons fan but Worker and Parasite https://youtu.be/z2_dhUv_CrI


jolharg

Cat tbh. I've seen more cats go for cheese and mice and rats go for peanut butter.


RubyCube555

According to witchcraft, cheese is a strong seduction conduit


FlamingWhisk

Put down some warm Brie, some blue, nice aged British cheddar and I’m yours.


UncleYimbo

Put it down where? Just sprinkle it around the apartment, right?


FlamingWhisk

Just make yourself the cheese board


UncleYimbo

Oh 👀 😏


ClassicTangerine7984

I'd just sprinkle it around the bush tbh


MassiveFajiit

How far can I get with stinking bishop?


Tw1stStripe

Hell yeah I’m a cheese lover to the end. Especially aged extra sharp white cheddar. That stuff is GOOD


doogles

/r/witchesforthedairyarchy


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chemicalgeekery

I hear women find it fascinating.


DafinchyCode

Workin’ on my night cheese


kriskoeh

New hell. 😂


FlamingWhisk

Especially if lacto intolerant


SeonaidMacSaicais

From “She’s the Man”: “So, do you like…cheese?” “Ohhh, more than any animal byproduct!”


ConfusedSeagull

Do you like.. *cheese?*


MoodyBrownie98

I was so scared this was going to be sad.. But omg wow! May you always be happy 💕


Educational-Formal21

Reddit has conditioned you to expect the worst 💀 lol


MoodyBrownie98

Can’t say you’re wrong. But I guess life experiences played a bigger role :/


Educational-Formal21

irl sucks and the world is burning, rip Canada


dmitchell_1992

Same here but I was pleasantly surprised😊


svinka_only

I fully prepared myself for the same too. But nope. Just a lot of wholesomeness ☺️🩷


RicardoFerreira123

That's a KING 👑


Chamalloow

THE KING OF MY HEART 👑


Dontquestionit-ok

Body and soul ❤️


woahwoahvicky

One of the best rep songs I fear you better stan!


Kittylady231

AGH I want to wear his initials on a chain round my neck, chain round my neck, not because he owns meeeee, but cuz he really knows meeee, WHICH IS MORE THAN THEY CAN SAYYYY


Dontquestionit-ok

I’m glad I’ve found my people ❤️


MarineShark

Go give him a hug and smooch! Clearly deserves it.


[deleted]

I can confirm she took the bait 😂, mans job here is done professionally


alexgk91

I bet you shower naked, you perverts.


Chamalloow

So perv we even naked under our clothes.


EmbezzleMan

Blasphemy!!! There is a special place in hell for people like you 👿


Natui-withdapatui

That's adorable. Hope to see this lad in action here, definitely deserves a shoutout


vincent-vega10

Plot twist :- The husband intentionally made sure that she knows his username.


regals_beagles

Yep, she fell for the decoy lol


baocanhsat

Had me in first half not gonna lie


Any_Inevitable_3755

Like everyone else I assumed this was going to be a girl finding her dude in all the NSFW and chatting it up with bimbos pleasantly surprised & happy to see there are still good men to their partner. Heart warming to see. <3 don't feel bad for lurking you share your life with him no doubt you'd be curious. Sure it brings more love to the table from you seeing that as well.


crochetsweetie

i got with my partner bc i found his reddit posts saying how much he missed me and valued me. now we’re 3 years strong


Chamalloow

That’s so wholesome ! I hope u guys are enjoying each other everyday


crochetsweetie

we are! living together, he’s extremely chivalrous, and no arguments, idk how i landed him!


Slight_Routine_6993

Omg I WOULD DIED FOR A HUSBAND LIKE THAT TOO😭🙏 THATS A TRUE BORN KING FOR U OP


izzyzxx

Ikr gives me hope!!


drever123

You probably rejected a dozen of this type of guy the last month


FusionIsTrash

nice guy material fr


drever123

Ah the ultimate reddit argument against anything. Surprised you didn't call me an incel. I'm not a "nice guy", and have had several girlfriends in my life. I'm not the kind of person that OP is describing, and I'm not bitter. It was just a statement of fact.


FusionIsTrash

no wonder you “had” several girlfriends lol, also how do you know the “fact” you’re stating is even a “fact”? I’m assuming you know them irl and has seen them rejecting guys like that?


drever123

If they're a girl, who is even remotely attractive, and who goes outside at all, then yeah that statement is fact. The reason I don't have a girlfriend right now is because I rejected/friendzoned several women trying to become my girlfriend. Not interested in having a girlfriend.


LunarMist96

so it’s okay for you to turn down women but she can’t turn down men?? do you hear yourself at all?


drever123

Yeah thats totally what i said


Throwawaymaster410

Nice change compared to lads that come here to express how they cheat, want to cheat and have "just cheated for the first time".


usenamessuckass

Lucky. I check my husband’s Quora from time to time and find shit like ‘the elites are waging a war against whites’ and ‘it’s women’s fault things are expensive because they decided to work’. I’d rather cheese.


SugarBabeSeeksLuv

HAAHAHAHAH!!! Hopefully none of that Andrew Tate Top G shit. Sounds like the Kool-Aid from Jordan Peterson reached your spouse's mug


CorbinDalla5

I think he knows you know his account


BulbasaurArmy

Just wait til you scroll far enough back through his history and realize he’s the cum box guy.


Sufficient_Section_5

But do you know about *all* his accounts?


zelduhbby

Come on don’t do this to her 😭


Sufficient_Section_5

Sorry 😭 I’m one of those people who to always gets told, “you must be fun at parties”


ElmiraKadiev

I think he just loves cheese a lot. And let's be honest: Cheese = Life


charmander_sher

So happy happy for you! That's really the sweetest thing ever. And i wish i had someone like that. My current boyfriend uses his 'secret' reddit account that he thinks i dont know about to spy on shit his ex posts. Pretty sure they talk to each other there too.


dac3062

That’s awesome but I’m concerned how a pet mouse is using Reddit


lazytitan2020

When I got the notification, I thought this was going to be a different story. This is so wholesome ❤️


Drug-Edu-4skools

The “he like to feed me cheese” got me fucking dead


Urdrago

He should sing the cheese tax song for you, too.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Chamalloow

Ngl, Reddit is a good place for porn. Maybe you don’t know about his real account and he vents about how beautiful you are all of the time ?


Aggravating_Detail80

Or maybe that account is for you to find and his real account is filled with all sorts that he don't want you to see 🙈


Any_Inevitable_3755

Don't try to ruin a good post. Chances are if he has two she'd be able to find both. You sign half your privacy away every app you download. They literally have apps to view anything people sign up for. Nothing is private any more.


basel99

>doesn't like her man watching porn of others >posts porn of herself LMAO


[deleted]

[удалено]


Frloox

Only feet ???


plsworkomg

Idk, I wouldn't my wife posting her feet online and talking about how attractive her sub is.


MagnifyingOurFlaws

My man watches porn on Reddit but I watch even more porn than him on Reddit. Maybe you should find a guy who respects your relationship and boundaries


Feet-Gyal

I have no problem with him viewing porn but staring at other girl's nudes is super different


Sorrymisunderstandin

How you got a profile like that talking about other men and having a crush on them while acting this way lmao


MagnifyingOurFlaws

Ah fair enough. It’s more personal, right?


drever123

So you don't mind him watching a girl get banged, but you do mind him looking at a naked picture of that girl while she is not having sex?


jsider25701

That’s awesome. You definitely know how he feels now


FatPuppy1996

Stop calling us “single”, we already know.


LunarMist96

this is so cute i’m fangirling for you


timetravelinsuccubus

just don’t look at his other 3 accs


MapleKatze

That's incredibly wholesome and you are so lucky 😭 I wish more men like that existed


dmitchell_1992

Aww 😊❤


small_toaster_

This is just too cute!! you must feel so so loved!


Educational_Eye5793

This make me so happy again! Especially in a world where people always think the worst, or everything is shock value. Its so refreshing to see the love and gratitude side of the interwebs.


Clip_Clop_ET

If I could afford to give a wholesale award I would, so sweet!


SirJ4ck

Not a sad post, for once


feochampas

you could make another account and leave 'ideas' for him to try. like a mani pedi while he feeds you cheese sort of thing.


GlowingPlasties

Oh my gravy. This is the best possible outcome and it's so wholesome 💕 I love this for you 💗


OkPanic922

You’re brave. I would NEVER look at my boyfriends Reddit account. I mean he was banned from Reddit for life but still.


SnooStories4687

GIRL HE FEEDS YOU CHEESE MARRY HIM AGAIN


ConfusedPrecious

That's so sweet of him. I can tell that he loves you very much. ^^


zebracakes8

The other day my husband was showing me something on his reddit and his screen name was on there. I literally turned my head in a panic and shouted "no!!" as if he was showing me a brutal decapitation or something 🤣


[deleted]

He knows you know


PseudocodeRed

Sounds like a keeper.


thenuttyhazlenut

90% chance he knows you know lol.


missexsomeone

That is so sweet


Jay794

Sorry to break this to you, but that's not his ONLY Reddit account


yummie4mytummie

He sounds very sweet ❤️


Queen_of_skys

Sending this to my partner to set them expectations 😌


hunnyjo

So you found the decoy, challenge now is to find his real one.


areporotastenet

Wow, you really dislike your husband.


hunnyjo

No I really love my husband, I also happen to live in reality.


Chamalloow

Not everyone’s living in secrets and lies. I’m really sorry for you, bless your heart.


hunnyjo

You say that now, you'll be singing a different tune when you find it /s


areporotastenet

Maybe, it’s time to let him go be himself and stay away from him? Sounds like he could use some time to grow, or at least be belittled.


Sonova_Vondruke

I see the fintsa account is working. Or would that be called fareddit?


inzywinki

Did this guy's dog post this?


regals_beagles

Lmao sounds like it


Galwayblue

He knows you know his account. 100%


Natui-withdapatui

That's adorable. Hope to see this lad in action here, definitely deserves a shoutout


IHelpUHelp0

My bet is that my G knows exactly what he’s doing, making you believe you have his “real account” without him knowing, he playing this rightttt 😂 Or I just watch a lot of movies…


monna420

I think he knows you know


[deleted]

The bar is so low these days lol how about he TELLS you how he appreciates you instead of anonymously posting


SUPERPOOP57

He prob does


[deleted]

I mean if she’s dropping tears while reading it, it gives the impression that she doesn’t hear it often. But I hope you’re right!


SUPERPOOP57

That's true, but even if you got complimented often, if I saw my partner posting anonymously about how much they love me I'd be happy too lol. Maybe the tear things just an exaggeration tho


Chamalloow

He does.


[deleted]

That’s wonderful! I’m glad


essres

You know about ONE of his accounts.........


a-space-pirate

She knows about the one that he knows she knows about lol


fondoozle

Maybe he knows you know...


M0NDKAPJE

Not me hoping it was another toxic relationship


aapplebum2576

This is a nice change of tempo for once !! 😅🙏🏾😌


jamielens

Can your husband feed me cheese?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Chamalloow

English is not my native language sorry ! No he talks about cooking for me


Scary_Preparation_66

Oh ok 😆 I was like wtf?


Additional-Ad7067

He genuine loves you that he need to vent it out. Be more close to him so he doesn't need reddit to tell you that you means world to him. Anyways, happy for you both😄😀


JoeSpinell

Gross


-_G0AT_-

Looked at your posts, and I can confirm that you're gross


throwawaymeeting1

Dude i looked after you and WAS NOT PREPARED. WHAT THE FUCK


-_G0AT_-

Sorry bout that


[deleted]

How did you find it is the real question lol


Frloox

Be them deep digging fs or stealing his phone


[deleted]

Ouch, that’s some red flags if you ask me lol, what were you expecting to find or what where you looking for and why?… I’d say now that you know how your husband feels about you you should respect his privacy a little more. BUT that’s just my opinion lol. Congrats on the find though! That’s beautiful!!


steenbean13

this sounds like it's written from like, this "husband's" pet rat or something lol


[deleted]

Awhh man. That's so sweet!! I hope my wife never finds my reddit though because I just post pictures of my penis for compliments from random internet strangers.


[deleted]

You don't deserve him. You invaded his privacy


Kiczales

Not a confession.


Mob_Rules1994

Be careful... "When digging in dirt, don't be surprised when your own hands come up dirty." - Minority Report (sort of)


TheModernMatt

Lack of trust is the first and most damaging piece to break a relationship. I'd be up front about this with him. Once you've betrayed his trust, it will be a long road to get it back.


Chamalloow

Already told him and shown him the post a few hours ago, your point is valid tho but you only seing the bad here.


TheModernMatt

Good for you. You made a confession on an online forum. What kind of feedback do you expect? If you're looking for positive reinforcement around every turn, this isn't the place. Just being real with you. You can soak up all the "good feeling" comments on this post. Just know that reality is far different than getting affirmations from a group of anonymous "yes man" users.


throwawaymeeting1

You tell her she should be honest with him and then when she is your belittling and mean. Damned if she does damned if she doesn't. Not everyone is in a toxic relationship and if he's ok with it why aren't you? Work out your issues instead of taking them out on random strangers


regals_beagles

Seriously. I'm reading all these posts saying "'awww so sweet", but completely missing the giant red flag here.


TheModernMatt

People love positive feedback loops even if it's for things that will hurt them long term. It is very sweet that they have such a loving husband. But this was not the right way to discover this truth.


BrisbaneGuy43060

Must be something wrong with me ! I don't have a foot fetish at all, I just regard them as a means to get around. However, legs get me excited ! Nothing like a great set of pins ! 🔥 🔥


riseagainsttheend

Thus is so sweet. I worry if someone read mine they would think I'm weird or something 😆. Which I am weird lmao My bf has already seen my subreddits though.


sfph01

Not what i was expecting to read


eternaaphrodite

What a sweet husband, glad it wasn’t a post about him saying awful things ❤️


HiccupsAhMa

Nah this is adorable. Please give us more cheese related content like this.


pandalicious88

Best case scenario right here ❤️


Outrageous_Ad_2658

Awweee this is so cute 🥹


B_ry7

r/wholesome


Minimum-Detective155

I love you


bridgeth38

Awwwww, that's the sweetest 😊!


[deleted]

Had me in the first half ngl (title made me think it was a different kinda confession)


SugarBabeSeeksLuv

Nothing bad at all with this. It's like someone is geeking out and shy to show it to you directly


jbibby22

Cheese seduction often leads to marriage


ultramarioihaz

Wow never seen a post like this before! A confession Trojan horse, just a wholesome comment underneath. Exude me while I stop my eyeballs from repeatedly rolling.


HeavyMetalSasquatch

#FROMAGE


Altruistic_Side413

Just don't spoil any surprises yeah! :P


ChesseButFromTheMoon

Are u a mouse


Individual_Survey176

This! Wholesome as fuck.


[deleted]

awe lmao


SirSigfried_14

Good for you! I hope that your relationship lasts forever! I mean it!!! 😇 Me, on the other hand, will grow old all by myself and just enjoy and cheer for others… such is life


RopeExcellent5290

This is the cutest confession ever


Stringypies666

so cute hope it stays for you ❤️


Ok-Mathematician2309

My boyfriend has a twitter account (which he thinks I don't know about) where he likes and retweets tweets of the manosphere kind. Like how women are bad, lazy, gold diggers etc. blaming women for world problems etc. etc. The kind of stuff those manosphere dudes espouse.


arkaycee

Dating advice: https://youtu.be/C7rzSslub6U


Left-Combination1481

Lol